The Call of the Moon

Chapter Twenty-Eight

While Remus had always been quieter, and far more withdrawn than the rest of the Marauders, he had come far out of his shell from what he had once been. Or at least until now. Struggling in his own way to deal with his grief, Remus had drawn back into himself. The first few weeks after the holidays were a trial. The first time he set foot back into the Common Room, Lily had thrown her arms around him in a warm hug.

"James told me…oh, Remus, I'm so sorry."

Taken aback at first, not in the least because she had called James by his first name and not just 'Potter', and though he appreciated her concern he was very aware of a few curious glances. James clapped him on the back just as Remus turned to raise an eyebrow at him.
"Did he?"

"I thought you wouldn't mind, and she was asking."

He didn't really mind that James had told her. Lily was one of the most genuine people Remus had ever met, and one of the kindest too.

"I did ask, I'm sorry." Lily offered him a kind smile as she released him. "If I can do anything, please just ask."

"…thank you, Lily, but you really can't." He returned the smile as best he could and let his gaze wander over to the couches where the Prewett twins quickly pretended they had not been watching the exchange. "I think…I'm just gonna go to bed."

Stepping around Lily he moved over towards the staircases leading up to the dormitories and slid between Frank and Alice who stood talking just at the foot of the stairs. "Excuse me."

Sinking down onto the fourposter, quilted in scarlet, Remus immediately felt much more at home than he ever had in his own house. He just lay there, staring up at the curtains of his bed for a full two minutes before he realised he was crying again.
Muttering under his breath, Remus reached up to dry his eyes and slowly sat up. Silently he got up and moved around to his old trunk which by now was held together only with magic. Withdrawing from within, safely stowed away so as to avoid damage, a picture frame Remus fell back on his ankles and traced the picture with his fingertips.

It was the only one he had with his parents. He'd only been a little boy, no older than six or seven when it had been taken with Hope's muggle camera. Sitting on his father's knee, young, unscarred Remus sat grinning at the camera, looking thrilled with himself as both his mother and father stared at him instead of the camera. Their smiles were so real, and yet even then so full of fear for their son that Remus could see it through a photograph. Despite that, there was a happiness there that he remembered well, one that brought the tears back to his eyes as he stood and placed it on his bedside table. By the time anyone else came in, Remus was balled under the blankets and pretending to sleep.

Then there was Jenna. He'd left her letters unanswered too in the holidays, and she didn't know. So when she had slipped in to the spot beside him at the Gryffindor table at lunch and asked him how his holidays were he'd had to say it out loud for the first time.

"Did you get my letters? I got worried when you didn't write back." Her Irish lilt usually made him smile but it did not so much as earn a twitch of his lips. He could feel Sirius' eyes on him across the table as he absently stabbed holes in the roast chicken on his plate and couldn't bear to even look up at her.

"I got them." He answered as simply as he could "Sorry I didn't answer you."

"Look, Jenna, Remus just had…busy holidays." Sirius jumped in in a quick attempt to rescue Remus from an awkward conversation but Remus just shook his head and dropped the cutlery to his plate.

"Thanks, Sirius, you don't have to do that, it's alright." He drew in a long breath and absently drew away from the hand that Jenna had placed on his back as he turned to look at her. Unable to meet her eyes he just focused on her red curls. "My mother…my mother died just before Christmas."

It was blunt and direct and he hoped invited no questions as he swallowed the lump that leapt into his throat and unconsciously raised a hand to his chest as if that would stem the pain of the hole there.

"Oh my-I had no idea…Remus, I'm so sor-" There were tears in her eyes when he managed to meet them for just a second and he was sure she had leaned over to kiss his cheek before he quickly lifted a hand to stop her.

"I'd really rather not talk about that. I'm dealing with it."

Words blurred in his classes and he imagined everyone in the room was staring at him, he could barely focus anymore on the runes he was trying to study, or the incantation he was trying to memorise.

And then there was the full moon, falling right in the middle of the second week of term as if mocking him and only adding to the alienation he already felt. That was the night things went from terrible to much worse.

xxxXxxx

Inside the Shrieking Shack, the beast paced, breaths coming in heavy pants as it dropped to four paws on the floor, its human mind, human grief and worries all erased clean away to make room for the impatient, hungry mind of a wolf that wanted freedom. It knew this place, it knew the scent of the fresh air that wafted up from the trapdoor down the corridor. The anger than once inhabited its mind was abated now, somewhat. There were friends, companions waiting for it at the end of the tunnel that would race, and run with him to make him forget about the starving hunger that was ever present.

Nearly too large to squeeze itself through the opening in the floor the grey brown werewolf landed with a thud on the earth, its heart beginning to beat with anticipation as it set off at a run down the tunnel. Heavy paws thundered along the ground until with a great burst of strength he hurtled out through the opening beneath the great tree in one bound. Squeezing out between the roots and leaving a tuft of thick fur behind, the werewolf immediately turned its head skyward. Drawn by nature to the moonlight, it reared up onto its hind legs, forelegs hanging down and scraping the grass with its claws, and howled. It was a long, lonely sort of sound, echoed almost immediately by a chorus on the wind.
The wolves, neither regular nor were, which inhabited the forest responding to the commanding presence of the far stronger werewolf and for a moment, the wolf that was Remus dropped and turned its head. Ears pricked attentively towards the trees and haunches poised to leap into action.

Until a loud bark caught its attention and it spun to face the ever odd assembly of animals that waited to greet it.

Moony let out a low rumble that wasn't quite a growl and bounded up the slope to meet them. The stag that stood eye to eye with it dipped its head in greeting and the rat, perched upon its antlers squeaked a hello.

With the dog, the stag and the rat, Moony could pass a night that was full of freedom and fun, and take him away from the vicious creature that only wanted to hurt and kill things. It rarely turned on itself anymore. But of course that made the few months when it was locked up in a cellar even harder to endure.
Most months the rag tag group of animals kept to the shelter of the trees, but there were some nights they dared wander the grounds of the school. Not so near that the werewolf would be tempted by the scent of humans, but free in the open air where Prongs could leap about without entangling himself in a bush, where they didn't need to worry about Wormtail getting too lost, and where Moony could bask in the light of the full moon.

Padfoot broke into a sprint with a playful growl challenging his friends to a race, one which Moony would easily outstrip him in, his powerful legs carrying him three times the distance in a single bound as the dog could manage. So they wandered and explored and raced around the deserted the grounds, far from any danger of harm coming to anyone so long as his friends stayed in their animal forms. Until in the late hours of the night, when Prongs had stopped to take a breath near the Owlery and Wormtail dropped unsteadily to the ground to gain his feet again. The wind changed.

Padfoot caught up next, unaware for a second that the werewolf wasn't with him until the stage snorted and they exchanged a very human look.

A growl, deep and menacing such as they had only heard once before on that fateful night that Severus had discovered Remus' secret, sounded somewhere behind them.

The werewolf stood frozen a ways back, his head turned sharply in the direction of the castle and ears flat back against its head.

The wind had changed, carrying not the scent of owls and night air toward him, but a rare and tantalising smell. The only thing that could have flipped that tentative switch from content to carnivorous.

Humans. Flesh and blood. That was the only thought that filled Moony's head now as he breathed in deeply. Slowly, every inch the perfect hunter, he turned his great body followed his nose toward the castle. They were too far away for any human eyes to see. But a werewolf could make out the two shapes in the dark that crept from the great doors of the castle. Everything was forgotten. His animal companions and the fun he had running in the night was gone, wiped clean from his mind as his every thought turned into one. Kill.

He growled low in his throat, and then the werewolf sprung.

It all happened in less than two seconds.
One moment the dog was trotting happily alongside the werewolf towards Prongs and Wormtail, and then the next Padfoot was alone.
One moment Moony had been happy with them and the next it was as if they weren't there at all.

One moment Remus could find peace with his transformation, and the next he was taking off after some smell he alone could trace.

Padfoot and Prongs exchanged a glance, all the time it took for the werewolf to take off uninhibited.

And then they saw them too. Two students leaving the castle and it suddenly made sense. But they were too far away to see the danger that they'd suddenly put themselves in. Prongs snorted in a way that only meant "Go!" and as one they took off at full speed after the werewolf, leaving the rat squeaking in a panic on the grass.

This was it, finally. Years of waiting, years of hunger and thirst for blood, and only near misses to claim, had finally paid off. The wolf snarled, every long leap of its strong legs bringing it closer to the meal that still stayed blissfully unaware. Their backs were turned.

His eyes, keen and angry took in the dressing gowns, the hair that flowed freely, his nose the smell of feminine shampoo and, above all, the blood that he hungered for. Slowing, the wolf crouched in the shadows, close enough now that one bound was all it would take. He growled, loudly and threateningly and a grotesque sort of salivating sound smacked from his jaws.

The girls turned, while the beast neither recognised nor cared who his next meal would be, when he woke the next morning, Remus would. Then at once three things happened. They screamed, a loud piercing shriek of terror, the werewolf lunged, teeth and claws flashing, and a huge, long limbed shape hurtled into him.

Caught off guard, the wolf was thrown off balance, antlers crashing into his shoulders and tumbled sideways onto the grass. But he didn't care about the stag that was in its way, he paid no mind at all to the angry snorting and the aggressive head lowering to charge him again. But so blinded was the wolf by the humans so close that it just swung out a heavy paw and pushed the animal aside, hurtling itself at its prey again just as the dog leapt onto his back. Teeth sunk into the fur at the back of his neck and it took a mammoth effort to dislodge its attacker.

Closing the gap in seconds as they ran, he snapped wildly, desperately, and caught the back of a dressing gown. It tore in his mouth and Moony let out an angry roar just as roots burst from the ground and tore it away.

It was mere seconds before he'd snapped through them but it was long enough for the door to slam closed in his face.

The promise of a meal so close and now out of its reach, did nothing but enrage the savage creature. Throwing its whole weight at the door which didn't so much as creak under the pressure, it raked its claws savagely into the wood and howled.

Bad was an understatement, hell, so was catastrophic. All James could do was distract the werewolf long enough to buy the girls a few vital seconds to get away unscathed. It worked, for just long enough when a spell shot out and dragged Remus backwards, long enough for the shelter of the castle to protect them. But not enough to stop Remus from waking the entire castle with the racket he was making lunging at the doors.

And then Sirius leapt back into action, and the werewolf let out a pained, and far from quiet yelp as teeth sunk into its tail.

Moony spun, claws lashing out and blood running from its tail. Padfoot let go at once and ducked just in time to avoid losing an ear.

There was no trapdoor to slam closed now, no wand to cast any sort of protective enchantments, or hell, even a silencing charm. Just hooves and teeth and brute force to try and force the werewolf away from a castle full of potential victims.

Then just as suddenly as he had the first time, Moony froze and spun to stare back in the direction they had come from. There, standing and waving his very human arms wildly, was the stout form of Peter Pettigrew. The mad idiot had done something so stupidly brilliant it worked.

Forgetting the dog and the stag trying to control it, Moony hurtled over them, a mindless monster following its nose to human blood, no matter what it took to get it.

There was running around with a werewolf every month, and then there was making a werewolf run toward you. Every part of Peter was gripped by fear as he stood staring at the chaotic scene before him. He was a rat. There was nothing he could have possibly done to try and subdue a crazed werewolf. But what he could do was vanish.

Truth be told he hadn't thought very far ahead at all other than if Remus could find another person, he might leave the castle alone. So squeaking all manner of obscenities, Wormtail became Peter once more.

It worked almost instantly, so fast that Peter allowed himself a second to grin at his quick thinking. And then that grin vanished instantly when the huge grey mass was hurtling at him instead.

The werewolf's jaws closed on…nothing. Air. Where a person had stood a second again, there was nothing. Moony whipped his head around madly, frustrated beyond anything and still driven mad by the scent he could no longer place.

A rat squeaked terrified as his paw squashed a tail accidently and angrily the wolf stared down at it. He couldn't have human blood, he couldn't have the thrill of the hunt, he was furious, mad with hunger and it would do. Opening his jaws wide he went to snap…and yelped instead.

Hooves met his snout, kicking hard and rearing up again to hit him again. Blow after blow rained down, driving the wolf back a few steps until it left the rat alone.

Moony was mad, far more crazed than even the night Snape had found out. He had been bloodthirsty then, but now with so much that kept getting away from him…well even Prongs had to admit that the monster had really come out. Between himself and Padfoot, chasing it down and then leaping back out of the way and kicking out again, the werewolf backed off slowly. With a particularly savage snarl the beast turned tail and raced away towards the shelter of the Forest.

Panting heavily, the three Animagi stood together staring after their poor friend who knew too much sadness in his sixteen years. Only when they heard the very distant and familiar howl did they deem it safe to turn back. In a moment, they stood there human again, coats instead of fur now shielding them from the cold night air. For a moment they said nothing, and James readjusted his glasses that had fallen askew.

Peter was trembling head to toe, unable to shake the terror he was still in the grips of. One single snap of the jaws would have been enough as a rat, for Remus to kill him in a second.

"That was bloody brave, Pete." Sirius clapped him on the back, "You can actually think quickly in a pinch."

"I-it was nothing compared t-to you both."

"Guys…not the time…" James muttered, chewing his bottom lip and staring off toward the tree line where Remus had disappeared. "We blew it. We went too close."

"In our own defence, those girls should not have been outside, I don't think it's our fault."

James tilted his head sideways in a 'fair point' kind of way but cringed all the same. "You saw who it was right?"

Sirius sighed and rubbed his face wearily. "Yeah I did. He's gonna hate himself."

Too far away from most of the action to be able to see more than a couple of dressing gowns and long hair, Peter looked obliviously between his friends. "I-I didn't. Who was it?"

xxxXxxx

He woke to a wet nose sniffing his hair and blearily opened one green eye. Letting out a shout of surprise as he came face to face with a wolf, Remus shot up and scrambled backwards on his hands. But the animal just blinked and huffed at him, completely uncaring about the not quite human intrusion in the woods.
Remus had known for years that they could smell that he was a werewolf, but the thought didn't disgust him any less now and impatiently he waved a hand at the animal.
"Well go on then…shoo."

He hurt all over. That in itself was nothing new but somehow it was worse than usual. It wasn't just the muscular aching and soreness from the transformation, but it was bruises and cuts that he was sure weren't self-inflicted this time. The back of his neck strung as he reached up and gingerly touched his fingertips to it. They came away with dried blood and he shuddered to think of how that could have happened. Things were blurry, fuzzy still but his memories would return quickly.

"Moony!"

The welcome shout made the wolf, which had still just sat watching him, turn and dart off amongst the trees and, with a pained gasp, Remus pulled himself to his feet and tried to call back. His voice, hoarse and throat dry, sounded weak in comparison. "Here!"

Just as he had sunk back down onto the forest floor, legs too weak to hold him and dropped his face into his hands, James, Sirius and Peter all came into view looking almost as overtired as he felt.

A bundle of clothes dropped in front of him and after a few moments spent summoning the energy, he started to pull them on.

"How you feeling, Moony?"

Sirius sounded too cheerful, the pretend kind of cheerful voice he put on when something had gone wrong.

"Sorry about the black eye, mate."

"Wha-ah!" He just stared confused at James as he raised a hand to his left eye and immediately felt pain throb through his head all over again. "…oh what did I do?"

"You…don't remember yet?"

"Give it a minute, I'm sure that I will." Remus mumbled, giving up with the jumper only halfway over his head and relishing the brief darkness. "Just…shush for a second."

He must have sat there longer than he'd thought, unmoving and trying to forget the pain. It was so much worse. He heard someone kneel in front of him and forced his head back into the light to come face to face with James.

"Remus…don't freak out, alright?"

Maybe it was the sombre look in the faces of his friends but it all began to come back to him. Something had gone wrong, terribly wrong like the night Snape had gotten into the shack. He remembered the smell first, warm and overpowering when he caught it on the air. And then like a wave he remembered the all too exhilarating thrill of the chase when he followed his nose. Someone had been in the grounds, no, two people, when they really shouldn't have been.

Slowly he lowered his gaze and ignored the hand on his shoulder as fuzzy clouds of memory began to make sense. His heart began to race, his breathing sped up anxiously and then Remus all but threw James' hand away from him. "Oh no…oh no, no, no…"
Girls, two girls. Copper coloured hair, and red curls. Red curls. He knew the smell of that shampoo anywhere.

And then with a surge of energy he hadn't been able to muster before, Remus took off running.

"Remus! Stop!"