Chapter 35: Lean

November 15, 1943

"Sergeant Barnes, you know you're not supposed to be over here." Nurse Barbara chided, sneaking her hand around Bucky's elbow and tugging him away from the intensive care ward doors. He gave her his most charming grin, the one he used to use when trying to get girls to dance with him back in New York. It was a little rusty, which was probably the only reason the older woman was unimpressed.

"Now, Babs, I'm just taking a walk like the day shift nurse prescribed." he said, turning with her and then continuing the move so they were going his original direction. Barbara was unperturbed, pulling him around again in a sick doe-see-doe.

"Yes, but you see I've noticed every time you walk this direction, you happen to walk by Nurse Peters' room, and then you have a habit of falling asleep in there." Barbara said, only a little sarcastic. She patted his arm sweetly, as if comforting a grandchild. She had plenty of practice with that - she'd told him she had twelve of them. "And I can't have you soiling the reputation of one of our most highly decorated nurses."

"Babs! Whatever are you implying?" he asked, finally letting her lead him back towards his room. He could just escape when she went on her smoke break at five till midnight. Barbara sent an icy glare over the rims of her glasses.

"Just remember, Sergeant Barnes, I raised quite a few boys and even more girls. I know what's going on up there." she said, flicking the side of his head. He tried to swat her hand away, but she had surprising speed for an old woman.

"She's got a scar six inches long on her ribs-"

"And how do you know how long the scar is?"

"-and I worry about her, you know? She gets the nightmares too-"

"Which you also shouldn't know."

"But I love her, Babs!"

"I know, Sergeant Barnes. And you can tell her that every day and every night as soon you're discharged from the hospital." Barbara concluded, patting his hand again. "But until that day, you need to stay in your room and let the poor woman heal."

"She's fine, they said that they didn't find anything with the thoracotomy. And every day she's getting better." he said. Stubbornness may not have been his most attractive quality, but it was one of his more functional ones. Barbara glared at him again.

"And why were the doctors giving you information exactly?" she asked, a warning in her tone. Bucky decided to pretend he didn't hear it.

"She was asleep for once. Like you said, she needs to rest." he quipped, giving her that award winning smile again. She pinched his arm hard enough to leave a bruise, and held on so tight that he couldn't wriggle out of her grasp. She held him like that, despite protest and bargaining and whining, until they reached his room on the opposite side of the hospital. Of course he didn't share the real reason that he wanted to sleep in Lu's room: when he slept in his own, he had dreams that they were back in the cages, and that he was awoken by her screams echoing through the bunker. He wanted to stay in her room so that when he woke up, he could see that she was okay, thoracotomy scar and all.

"Stay in your room, Sergeant Barnes." Barbara said, letting go of him just so she could put her hands on her hips. For a woman that barely cleared five feet, she could certainly strike fear into a man. But then, some of her words from earlier sank in.

"Wait, so I can see her when I'm discharged?" he asked, trying and failing to hide the look of triumph on his face.

"Now that doesn't-"

"Discharge me! I'm fine! See? Fit as a fiddle. Right as rain. C'mon, Babs, I'm gonna go crazy if you make me stay in here. Give this bed to someone who needs it!" he bartered, for once speaking only the truth. It was a good offer, he really did feel fine, but the only move Barbara made was to cross her arms over her chest.

"You need that bed. Now lay down and go to sleep before I make you go to sleep." she said, raising her eyebrows and staring at him with a look that said she'd put down many men before. He mirrored her pose, standing up straight and crossing his arms, glaring back at her with every ounce of ferocity that he could muster. But Barbara had been holding staring contests since before he was born, and had a winning record that any hall-of-famer would be jealous of. After a few long, tense minutes, he sighed in defeat, going to flop down on the bed. He decided not to show her how much the movement hurt. "Good. Now stay there. If I catch you in the intensive ward again, I'll cuff you so hard your grandchildren will be born with a mark on their ear."

"Love you too, Babs." he deadpanned, staring at the ceiling and putting on a good show of sulking. Out of the corner of his eye he could see Barbara staring at him, finally stepping away once she was satisfied that he was staying put. Of course, as soon as he didn't hear her footsteps anymore, he leapt out of bed, using a hand on the doorframe to swing out of the room faster.

And come face to face with Barbara.

"Bed, Sergeant!" she yelled sharply. Bucky bit back a groan, giving in and letting her shove him back into the room.

"Are you sure you're not the sergeant here, Babs? You've got the voice down." he said. As promised, a thwack was delivered to the back of his head, actually making him see stars for a moment. "Hey! Whoa! That's patient abuse!"

"Turn in a T.S. slip to the chaplain." she said, shoving him to the bed. In his daze, he couldn't really fight back. Huh. Perhaps he was a little less 'fine' than he thought. Tough Shit indeed.

"Alright, alright, I've learned my lesson." he grumbled, this time getting under the blanket. Barbara thumped him on the ear for good measure.

"Damn right you did. Now stay put. I told you, if I find you in that girl's room-"

"Right, right, grandchildren, ear, all that. But if you never let me in her room then I can't give you grandchildren - AH. I WAS KIDDING." Bucky tried to make a joke, but Barbara put an end to it. Instead of thumping his ear, this time she pinched it. Hard.

"Hush, Sergeant Barnes. You'll wake Private Connors." she said, sweet and serene and giving him a smile that would cause the Devil himself to break into a cold sweat. Bucky decided not to quip that Private Connors hadn't awoken the entire week he'd been here, but instead squirmed until she finally let go. "Stay. In. Your. Room."

"Sir, yes, sir." he said, this time throwing a hand up in time to block her attack. She didn't persist, instead giving him a firm look over her glasses before sauntering out of the room. Fine. That was fine. He could spend one night away from Lu. She'd be okay. Probably. Maybe? Probably. Definitely...Probably.

The bed was definitely more comfortable than the chair in her room, but that didn't seem to help him rest any easier. Every creak and rustle on the hospital floor kept him from falling asleep, and he could hear Barbara and the other nurses with their sure, purposeful steps as they made their rounds. They often walked together, murmuring quietly about the dayshift gossip in an attempt to stay awake all night. Patients groaned and coughed, rusty bed springs creaking as they rolled over heavily. And someone's goddamned IV pole was squeaking with every slow step they took down the hall.

"Barnes?" Lu whispered from the door, making him jolt out of the half-doze. In his annoyance, he hadn't realized the wheels were coming closer to his room. He sat up, barely letting the blood come back to his head as he stumbled out of bed to her.

"Hey, alright?" he asked quickly, his voice just a touch too loud in the night. He glanced out into the hallway; no Barbara in sight. He put a supportive arm around Lu's waist, guiding her inside. "Come on. Sit down."

"Thanks." she said. She still walked with a slight lean, favoring the side that got cut into a couple days before. After the quick needle procedure to release the excess air in her chest, the doctors had insisted they explore further and make sure there was no internal damage that needed addressing. Lu had completely agreed, knowing the protocol for the situation. But when they got in there everything was perfectly healed, as if she'd never had issues at all. So, they'd simply closed up the scar and left her to regain her strength.

"Was it another nightmare?" he asked as she sat on the edge of his bed. She shook her head no, looking down at the ground. He sat down next to her, looking for any sign of what was wrong. "Does it hurt?"

"A little. Not really." she said, shaking her head again. "Just feels tight."

He looked for any clues on her face, but she wasn't giving him anything more than furtive glances from beneath her blonde hair. He reached up to smooth it away from her face, one corner of his mouth lifting in a grin as she subconsciously leaned into his touch. "Ah, Doc. Did you miss me?"

"Was worried Barbara finally got sick of your shit and threw you out the window." she said, and even in the dim light from the moon through the window, he could see her cheeks color. He gave a dry laugh.

"I was put on house arrest. There were a lot of threats made, and a couple of them already followed through." he explained. His smile dropped, his eyes going serious. "But I was still gonna find a way to get to you."

"Sorry. Got impatient." she said, gracing him with a small smile. He nodded, leaning forward to press his lips to her forehead. She leaned into him fully, his embrace much more comfortable than any bed or chair. "Are you tired?"

"I can stay up, if you want." he whispered into her hair. He'd recovered from most of the exhaustion, but it still clung to him in the early morning hours. She shook her head.

"I'm tired too." she said, almost sounding grateful. Bucky kissed her head again, then made to stand.

"Lay down, go to sleep. I've got the chair." he said, wrapping his hand around the armrest in an attempt to pull it to the bedside. He stopped when he felt Lu's hand on his arm.

"This is your bed. I can take the chair." she said, trying to get up.

"Hell no. Get in that bed." he said. "That's an order."

"I still outrank you." she pointed out. He waved the comment off.

"Semantics. Come on, you gotta sleep." he said, guiding her towards the bed again. She paused, holding his hands.

"Lay with me? Just for a few minutes?" she whispered, so softly that he could barely hear it. It wasn't the first time they'd stolen a few moments to share a bed, and yet every time she acted like they were breaking a huge rule. Didn't she see that they'd escaped death, and that the rules didn't apply to them anymore?

"Of course." he said, laying down with her. Questions about mores and beliefs and societal constructs of morality could wait for the morning. She curled up against him, still shifting around the incision on her ribs. Her breathing immediately settled as he held her. "Do you want me to rub your scar?"

"Barnes…" even at the lowest possible volume, she could still pack a warning into her voice. He felt her lashes brush the hollow of his throat as she opened her eyes again.

"No funny business, I promise." he said softly. She hesitated for a moment, her lashes still tickling his skin as she thought. She silently moved her shirt, taking his hand and leading it up to the scar. He slowly found the edges of it, surprised to find no bandages, and no scabs. "It's closed already."

"Yea." she said tightly. He could feel her heart pounding against her sternum.

"That seems...fast." he murmured, his brows pinching together.

"Yea." she said again, gripping his shirt tightly. Just a couple days ago they'd sliced her open, but now it was already healing. Already healed. Again he wondered what the hell they did to them back in that bunker; he'd been trying not to think about it, trying to just ignore the fact that most of the time he didn't feel like he'd been tortured and kept captive for a month, but the idea grew in the back of his mind like a dark shadow. It wouldn't stay there forever.

Lu was probably thinking the same thing, but neither of them spoke further about it. Instead, he just lightly massaged the puckered skin of her scar, rubbing tiny circles in one spot before moving on to the next one. It was slow and tedious, but he didn't mind, especially when Lu sighed with relief as the tension decreased, and even moreso when her breathing evened out and she fully relaxed into his arms. Even then he kept up the motions, telling himself that when she woke up she wouldn't feel the tightness anymore, and that she could breathe a little easier.

Barbara of course came back around sometime in the wee hours of the morning, her eyes flashing in the low light. Bucky held a finger to his lips, not wanting to wake Lu. Barbara's steps were quiet, but she marched over to him all the same, ready to unleash hell.

"Technically I'm not in her room." he whispered. Lu stirred, murmuring a half-asleep hm? that he quieted with a kiss to the side of her head. Barbara definitely looked like she wanted to strangle him, but when her eyes drifted to Lu her gaze softened. That look was all Bucky needed to know that Lu hadn't been sleeping at all on her own; like him, something just felt wrong about trying to sleep and not being near each other. Barbara heaved a mighty sigh, so passive aggressive that Lu mumbled again in her sleep, before turning on her heel and exiting the room. Bucky felt himself relax again, tucking Lu a little tighter before finally succumbing to sleep.

He didn't see Barbara again until the sun was starting to rise. It would be a bright and sunny day despite the season, the early rays already strong enough to paint the room gold. The woman gently awoke them using just her voice, learning long ago that shaking a soldier awake was a good way to get a broken wrist. "You've got to go back to your room, darling." she said, placing a motherly hand on Lu's shoulder once she saw that she was awake. "Day shift will be here soon."

Lu nodded, giving Bucky a meaningful look and a grateful smile before crawling out of bed, detangling her IV line and using the pole to help herself onto her feet. The first few steps in the morning were always a little rough, and he couldn't help but feel disappointed that she was still leaning towards her scar. Barbara put a hand on her back, gently leading her towards the door.

"Hey, Babs?" Bucky whispered. It still felt too early to speak normally, as if the volume would break the magic of their little conspiracy bubble. Barbara looked over her shoulder, raising her eyebrows in response. "Thank you."

She smiled at him then. "You're welcome." she said with a nod. She didn't add an anytime or an of course because technically she was aiding and abetting. But she was also willing to bend the rules if it would help her patients. Bucky knew another nurse just like that.

He settled back into his bed, knowing that he had to at least pretend for the first part of the morning so that the day shift wouldn't be wise to his shenanigans. The squeaking from Lu's IV pole got fainter and fainter as she went down the hallway, and even if he knew that it was necessary, he still found himself feeling antsy that she was out of his sight. He tapped his toes against the foot of the bed, a fast, anxious rhythm that really did nothing to soothe him. In fact, after a moment, it started to annoy him.

"Sorry." he said gruffly to his roommate, who as usual, gave no response. Bucky got out of bed and started pacing the side of the tiny room that had a window overlooking the front of the hospital, looking for anything to distract him for the time being. There was dust rising in the direction of the road, a big billow of it that signified multiple trucks speeding towards them. He paused, watching the cloud grow closer and closer. That probably wasn't a good sign.

"Sergeant Barnes!" a woman said, not hiding her stress near as well as she thought she did. He snapped around at the sound, standing at attention out of habit. The day shift nurse - Ellen, he thought her name was - already looked slightly haggard, flyaway hairs escaping from her bun and her hat just slightly off kilter.

"Yes, ma'am?" he asked, relaxing again. He wasn't in trouble, for once.

"Good news, you're getting out of here today!" she said. If she'd noticed his startle, she didn't comment on it. She didn't comment on him being out of bed either. Instead she marched right up to him, looking at her clipboard. "You have discharge instructions to continue drinking fluids, and to gently ease into activity. Of course, you'll be returning home-"

"Home? Like, home home?" he asked. He'd spent the last six months dreaming of going back to New York. But now it suddenly seemed very, very far away.

"All members of the 107th that were held behind enemy lines are granted an honorable discharge." she said, still looking through paperwork.

"That doesn't sound right." he said. The Army generally didn't care about prior prisoner of war status, they usually only cared if you were able-bodied enough to return to the fight. Ellen looked up, blinking as if she was just now seeing him.

"I'm sorry?" she asked. He shook his head.

"Nevermind. You were giving me discharge instructions?" he said, able to hide his anxiety better than her. What was going to happen now? Where was he going to go? Where was Lu going?

"Right, um…" she ran the tip of her pen over the pages, trying to find her spot and failing. "A Steven Rogers is coming to collect you?"

"And what about the other patients here? What is happening with Lucille Peters?" he asked. He could've told the nurse without papers that Steve was coming to get him. Therefore, he had other concerns at the moment.

"The entire ambulatory floor is discharged, though some patients will be going to volunteer care facilities before returning either to active duty or home." she said. She pushed the clipboard in front of him, holding the pen to his face. "Sign here, please."

"But what about Lucille Peters?" he asked, signing the paper without reading it. It was all happening so fast.

"I don't know, Sergeant. I'm sorry. We have a major catastrophe coming in, so we'll need to vacate the floor as soon as possible. An orderly will be in shortly with clothing for you." Ellen turned on her heel and walked out of the room, breaking into a little jog once she thought he couldn't see her.

"Fuck a duck." Bucky muttered, turning to his roommate. "Can you believe this shit?"

Once again, he received no answer.

Sure enough, a big man in white brought him some olive drab clothes a few minutes later, asking if he needed help with them and barely hearing the no, thanks before he was back out of the room. Bucky changed quickly and tucked his discharge papers into his back pocket, disregarding all hospital staff as he went down the hallway to Lu's room. The curtains were closed around her bed, and he could see two pairs of feet below them. The nurse must be helping her dress; he was sure she loved that.

"The place you're going is wonderful. The mountain air will heal you right up." the kindly nurse was saying. So Lu wasn't going home, she was going to a care facility.

"I can just go. I don't need to take up the resources." Lu responded. There was a sharp intake of breath from her; she'd moved something wrong, and wasn't able to hide the pain.

"You need to heal, you're still standing sideways. It'll be a short trip, I'm sure. Enjoy it while you can." the nurse continued. Lu grumbled something, but he didn't understand it.

"There you are!" a voice boomed down the hallway. Bucky turned to see Steve coming towards him, thank God dressed in Army fatigues instead of that ridiculous costume from before.

"Dammit, you found me." Bucky said with a grin. Steve came up and clapped him on the shoulder. Bucky fought against a wince - he still wasn't quite used to how strong Steve was now.

"I can outrun you now, don't you forget it." Steve said, smiling broadly. He'd been waiting his whole life for this moment, it seemed. Bucky was saved from having to come up with a retort by the curtain rings screeching, freeing Lu from her hiding place. Her eyes widened as she saw them both, her cheeks flushing ever so slightly.

"Oh, um, hello." she said, obviously surprised by their presence.

"Hey there, Doc." Steve said. Bucky, however, was stunned speechless. Lu was in a blue floral patterned dress, with a flowy skirt that moved when she did. It hung relatively loose on her, but it seemed to allude to what curves she still had as opposed to highlighting how thin she still was. The nurse had brushed her hair and twisted it into a low bun, much less severe than the one she usually used when she was working.

"Shit." he said, earning a slap on the back of the head from Steve.

"There are ladies present, Buck." he stage whispered. Lu's blush deepend, but she still held her head high. The nurse was right though, she was leaning toward her scarred side.

"Are you going to the house too?" she asked. To anyone else, it might sound like just a curiosity question, but Bucky was more attuned to her now and could hear the hopefulness.

"Nah, he's-" Steve started to say, but Bucky quickly interrupted him.

"Yea, I am. Someone's gotta look after you." he said. Steve and the nurse both looked at him in confusion, but he ignored them. Lu looked unconvinced, but chose not to comment on it.

"I think it's more the other way around, but whatever floats your boat." she said. She smiled at the nurse and picked up her discharge papers off the bed, doing her best to walk on her own out of the room. Once they were in the hallway, she tucked her hand into Bucky's elbow, using him to lean on.

"I guess I'm taking you to a house, then." Steve said, for once reading the room. Bucky nodded.

"Much obliged." he said, mimicking a terrible Southern accent. Lu glared out of the corner of her eye, pinching his arm.

"I changed my mind. Take him with you." Lu said to Steve. He held up his hands.

"Sorry, ma'am. Orders are orders." he said, shaking his head. She perked an eyebrow.

"Aren't you a captain?" she pointed out.

"Pretty much in name only. Don't tell anyone." he replied, whispering conspiratorially. He led them out of the hospital, making it down the front steps just as the wave of ambulances rolled into the driveway. Bucky put an arm around Lu, half guiding and half carrying her out of the way of the running medical staff. Steve took them over to a yellow taxi waiting in the wings, a young man leaning against it and smoking a cigarette.

"Where we go?" he asked around the cigarette, nodding his head towards them. He spoke with a thick Italian accent, but before Bucky could try his hand at the language, Lu pulled out her papers.

"Here." she said, pointing to an address stamped at the bottom of one. The man nodded, dropping the cigarette and stomping it out with his shoe.

"Ok. We go." he said with a flourish, opening the door for her. Bucky helped her in and slid in after, Steve choosing to go in the slightly more spacious passenger seat. The Italian gave him a weird look, but either didn't know the English to question it or didn't care to. He took off in a blaze of dust and gravel, sailing down the driveway without a second thought. Lu looked a little pale, but otherwise fine, reaching across the seat to hold his hand. He looked over and gave her a warm smile, squeezing her fingers slightly.

Eventually they'd have to talk about what came next, but for now they were just along for the ride.

And now we're back to my comfort zone, with fluff and relationship development and all the good stuff!

Thank y'all so, so much for the reviews. I can't express how much they mean to me. I'm sorry I'm terrible at responding to them, I tend to get unreasonably nervous about it? Who knows. But I seriously love hearing what y'all think of this story!

Thank you for reading, let me know what you thought of this chapter!

-XM