Chapter 88: Sirius, Best Man
Sirius had three goals for the summer: he wanted Remus and Tonks to have a successful wedding, he wanted Harry to have a happy birthday, and he wanted Regulus to have a peaceful burial.
Through no decision of Sirius', the wedding came first. Tonks and Remus organized the wedding so quickly that under ordinary circumstances Sirius would have kept himself busy with a constant stream of jokes about how obviously the two of them had to get married right away, and why hadn't Moony been more careful?
But those jokes weren't funny in a world where Remus might have eliminated his son from existence by tampering with the very essence of time. These weren't ordinary circumstances. Once again, Sirius wondered what he would do if he were really, truly presented with ordinary circumstances. He had never experienced such a thing.
Sirius found the wedding preparations largely uninteresting. He wan't certain whether it would have been better or worse if Remus had actually cared about the details.
There was, of course, the day that Remus casually suggested that the wedding cake ought to be a carrot cake, and Tonks had flown into a fit of disbelief that carrot cake was not cake it was a vegetable before she'd realized that Remus was joking.
The cake turned out to be chocolate, with fifty ribbons twirled around the base that guests would pull to get a prize along with their slice of cake. Sirius was more or less looking forward to that. He hadn't seen a ribbon prize cake since his early childhood, and he knew that the prizes in this cake weren't going to be small gemstones emblazoned with the names of the Sacred Twenty-Eight.
Then there was the day that Tonks decided that she wanted to be married in a short purple-and-black dress that she had noticed in the window of a Muggle shop. No one disagreed with her proposal that Penny and Tulip should wear Muggle clothing while Remus, Harry, and Sirius wore dress robes to properly reflect the mixed heritage of the happy couple. But there was a certain amount of consternation regarding the color of her hair. Her favorite pink didn't match the dress, the shade of purple that did match the dress apparently made her look peaky, and she certainly wasn't going to wear her natural shade of brown to her own wedding. Eventually Penny determined that Tonks should color one half of her hair black while the other half faded from turquoise to purple to pink.
Sirius considered sending Penny flowers as a thank-you for making that conversation stop.
Three days before the wedding, Harry and Sirius all but moved into Andromeda and Ted's house to prepare their garden for the wedding. The wedding had been scheduled too quickly to allow for any other location, and Tonks liked the idea of having an outdoor ceremony at her beloved childhood home anyway.
Ted and Andromeda wanted to cast spells to keep anyone from accidentally tumbling into the pond. Sirius and Harry thought that it would be better to leave the pond unprotected in the event that someone disrupted the ceremony and needed to be thrown in. Andromeda eventually agreed with Sirius' plan, although he wasn't certain whether she was humoring him or whether she'd decided that he was right.
Otherwise, the preparations were what Sirius understood to be rather normal. Rows of rented chairs (real, not conjured, lest a spell fail at an inopportune time); many flowers, bewitched to appear purple and black like Tonks' dress; and tables that would be laden with food as soon as the ceremony ended. The coordination of food deliveries from a dozen establishments and the hiring of waiters were so frustrating that Andromeda spoke wistfully of using a house-elf.
Sirius never gave any real consideration to summoning Kreacher. Kreacher had gotten better at minding his tongue over the past six months, but under no circumstances did Sirius trust him not to describe the lot of wedding guests as mudbloods and half-breeds and Muggle filth.
It seemed that almost everyone Remus and Tonks invited made a great effort to arrange their schedules to attend the last-minute ceremony. There were a dozen Aurors, including a more-suspicious-than-usual Mad-Eye; a dozen of Tonks' classmates from school; a handful of Ted's Muggle relatives, looking dazzled by their surroundings; all of the Weasleys, since it hadn't seemed right to invite the four youngest siblings but not the rest of the family, and Molly apparently loved a wedding of any kind; and most of the Hogwarts faculty. Dumbledore had actively hinted for an invitation before they'd even been written/ Tonks and Sirius had found that slightly obnoxious, but Remus had found it charming.
Sirius and Remus stood in Andromeda's front room and watched the guests seat themselves. Peals of laughter occasionally drifted toward them from the upstairs bedroom where Tonks and her friends were getting ready.
Remus looked so pleased and amused that Sirius didn't quite know what to do. He had expected last minute panic. He had planned for flight attempts and self-loathing. He hadn't really considered the possibility that Remus would be relaxed and happy while Sirius himself felt dreadfully nervous.
Even James hadn't been this calm on the morning of his wedding, and James had gone through life expecting everyone to respect him and everything to work out in his favor.
"Did you drink a calming draught or something?" Sirius asked more harshly than he'd intended.
Remus didn't seem to mind the harshness. Remus didn't seem to notice the harshness. "No," he said vaguely. "I can't drink calming draught because one of the ingredients is aconite, and aside from the fact that it might poison me, it could also alter the effects of the wolfsbane potion I take before the next full moon."
Sirius flickered with annoyance. He knew perfectly well what was in a calming draught and why it was worthless to Remus. That wasn't his point. "I mean, are you really not nervous at all? About being bonded for life to my nine-year-old cousin?"
"If she comes down here looking nine years old to anyone other than you, I suppose I shall be concerned," said Remus. Now Remus understood exactly what Sirius had meant and was teasing him. Sirius was even more annoyed. He was tempted to shout for Harry to stop laughing with his friends and get back inside. It was almost time, after all.
"James was more nervous than you are," said Sirius.
"James was nineteen years old and he hadn't done this before," said Remus. "And it was the middle of a war."
It was depressing to be reminded that Remus was more worldly and confident than Sirius was. When they'd been students, Remus had looked to James and Sirius for protection and guidance. If James had lived, their roles would never have been reversed.
James' memory hung thickly in the air; speaking his name made the feeling neither better nor worse. It was in no way a betrayal for Sirius to stand up with Remus. James would have wanted Sirius and Harry to be in the wedding; James would have wanted to be in the wedding himself.
James wouldn't have been jealous.
Sirius was jealous. He was jealous that Remus was ready to bond himself for life to a woman who adored him while Sirius hadn't kissed a woman, let alone done anything else with a woman, for over a year. And when he'd kissed Félicité, she'd told him it wouldn't do, and she'd been right.
"You didn't invite Félicité Palomer?" he asked. Just because things wouldn't do in the long term didn't mean that they wouldn't do in the short term. What one would do with the balance of one's life was quite different from what one would do after attending a wedding. Wasn't it in the grand tradition of best men to have ill-advised sex with one of the guests?
"We did. She wasn't able to come, but she sent a gift with Fleur." Remus pointed to Fleur Delacour, who was draped over Bill Weasley's arm. Most of Bill's siblings were nearby; none of them looked entirely happy. Harry, predictably, was within the cluster of Weasleys. He broke away from them and trotted toward the house when he caught Sirius' eye.
"Is it almost time?" Harry asked.
"Very soon," Remus told him. "Are you ready?"
"Walk down the aisle and then stand there. Yes," said Harry, repeating the directions Sirius had given him more than once.
"Excellent," said Remus. "I knew I made the right choice when I asked you. I think your godfather may be in a little over his head."
Sirius muttered a vague obscenity that made both Harry and Remus laugh.
"Is it about making the toast?" asked Harry. "Because Fred said he's been to about a thousand weddings and he's never heard a good one, so there's not really any pressure. Everyone expects you to fail anyway."
"That's very helpful, Harry," said Sirius.
"I do like to be helpful," said Harry.
"You can make a toast, too, if you'd like," Remus suggested.
"I wrote one just in case," said Harry seriously. "It goes like this: let's all raise our glasses to Remus and Tonks right now so we can eat cake as soon as possible."
"That might put the Weasleys in a better mood." Sirius glanced outside once more. "What's wrong with them?"
Harry lowered his voice. "Bill's asked Fleur to marry him and she's said yes. The rest of his family doesn't like her."
"That happened the first time, too," Remus whispered. "They'll come around once they get to know Fleur better."
"You sure, Moony?" asked Sirius. "Because I don't think Molly will ever think anyone is good enough for any of her precious darlings. She might lock them all up in her attic to make sure no one ever takes them away from her."
Remus raised an eyebrow. "Be nice, Padfoot."
"I'll be nice today because it's your wedding day. I won't make a blanket promise covering all of eternity."
"Remus, on the other hand, had best be willing to make blanket promises covering all of eternity." A new voice interrupted them. Andromeda had come downstairs. "Nymphadora is ready. Tell the musicians and take your places."
Sirius, Remus, and Harry obeyed.
The ceremony was short. Kingsley murmured to Sirius that Tonks had threatened him with a particularly painful sort of dismemberment if he allowed the ceremony to be anything other than short. Remus said I do, and Tonks said I do, and Kingsley said bonded for life, so Sirius figured that the important bits were covered.
Tonks did trip as she stepped off the makeshift altar. Remus, who had obviously been anticipating as much, caught her easily.
Sirius took Penny's arm as Harry took Tulip's, and they all followed Remus and Tonks back up the aisle, stopping at the end to direct the guests to the tables on the other side of the garden.
"Now, Penny," Tonks ordered almost before everyone had reseated themselves. Behind them, one of the waiters was magically stacking the chairs they had used for the ceremony while another conjured a dance floor in their place.
Penny held up a glass of champagne and magically amplified her voice.
"Hi, everyone," she said. "All of you who know Tonks know that she wants you to have as much fun as possible today, and that her idea of fun is not listening to her maid of honor make a long speech. She doesn't want me to tell you about the first day we met, when we all should have been homesick but instead we spent the whole night laughing at her jokes. She doesn't want me to tell you about how loyal she is to her family and her friends. She definitely doesn't want me to tell you that sometimes when she's dancing she manages to elbow other people in the face even though they're five feet away. But she might be okay with me telling you that she has never been as happy, or as sure of herself, as she has been since she and Remus decided to get married. I'm happy to see the two of them happy, and I know that the rest of you are as well. So I'm going to ask you to please raise your glasses. To Remus and Tonks!"
"To Remus and Tonks," the others echoed, and Tonks pointed at Sirius.
Sirius' mind went blank. He wasn't bothered by the idea of speaking in front of a crowd. He'd testified in front of the entire Wizengamot about the worst experience of his life; what was one little wedding toast? He'd done a perfectly fine job when James had married Lily— said that James was his brother in all but blood and that gaining Lily as a sister made this one of the best days of his life.
There was no reason for him to freeze now.
There was no reason to feel like he ought to be at James' wedding, not at Remus', and like he ought to be nineteen years old, not thirty-six.
Sometimes there didn't need to be a reason.
He hesitated long enough that Remus made a move to intervene.
Sirius cast the charm to amplify his voice and raised his glass. He knew that his voice would be rough, but at least he would be able to force himself to speak. "I've been informed that virtually all wedding toasts are terribly forgettable and a waste of everyone's time. As Penny has already beaten those odds today with her tribute to my wonderful cousin, I don't think it's worth it for me to try to surpass her. I have also promised Remus— my best friend in this world— that I will be nice today, which further limits what I can say to you. So I will follow the advice of a wise young man and inform you that the sooner you raise your glasses, the sooner you will be allowed to eat cake. To Remus and Tonks!"
"To Remus and Tonks," the crowd echoed obediently, many of them tittering slightly.
The music snapped back to attention, and Remus led Tonks onto the newly-conjured dance floor. They danced alone for only a moment or two before gesturing to the members of the wedding party. Penny put her hand on Sirius' arm.
Sirius glanced nervously across the floor at Harry. He recalled that Harry had all but sworn off dancing at the Yule Ball; he doubted that Harry was pleased to have to dance with Tulip, pretty as she was in her blue dress.
"Are you worried about Harry?" asked Penny as Sirius led her robotically through the steps of the dance. It was something slow and wizard-composed, to Sirius' relief. He didn't have to think much to look like he was paying attention.
"He's only ever been to one school dance. Dancing at a wedding is new to him, especially with a grown woman he doesn't even know."
Penny giggled indulgently. "Tulip will take good care of him."
"Tulip is the one who accused Remus of murdering his last girlfriend."
"She never technically accused him of it. She was just speculating." Penny smiled. "Tulip's like that. She sees a mystery and she has to solve it. Murder seemed more likely than lycanthropy, is all."
As they watched, Tulip said something that made Harry wave sarcastically at Sirius. "All right," said Sirius. "I don't suppose anything bad can happen in the next three minutes."
That was ridiculous. Bad things happened in three minutes all the time. It certainly hadn't taken Lily and James three minutes to die. But he spun Penny in his arms anyway.
A blonde witch stepped to the edge of the dance floor, camera in hand. Many of the attendees carried cameras, but most of the cameras were focused on Remus and Tonks. The blonde was focused on Sirius and Penny. When Sirius got a good look at her, he thought that he knew why.
"Is she your sister?" he asked.
Penny nodded. "Yes. Beatrice."
"You look a lot alike." It was a stupid thing to say. He had never enjoyed hearing that he and Regulus looked alike, not only because he was obviously taller and more handsome than Regulus, but also because he had not belonged with his family despite outward appearances.
"Only when we're dressed up." Penny's perpetual smile faltered. "She's usually dressed head to toe in dragon hide."
"Is that so terrible?" Sirius didn't think he would mind dressing from head to toe in dragon hide if the moment called for it.
"No." She bit her lip. "But she likes to get herself into dangerous situations. Curse breaking. Not trained, organized Gringotts curse breaking like Bill Weasley does. Freelance. Unofficial things. I worry about her."
"How much younger is she?"
"Four years."
"My brother was less than two years younger than I was. But there was still a time when our parents said that I was responsible for him because I was older, and it was rather difficult to shake that long after he'd decided that I should."
"Exactly!" Penny's smile flashed again, but only briefly. "Bea— well, she spent her first year at Hogwarts trapped inside a painting."
"How?"
"I'm still not certain. A curse, obviously, and we think she must have touched the wrong portrait at the wrong time. Once we broke the curse, I drove her mad trying to protect her. I wanted to take care of her but it only made her furious with me. She was growing up, she didn't idolize me any longer… it's a wonder that I didn't permanently destroy our relationship."
Sirius couldn't say anything to that. He'd permanently destroyed his relationship with Regulus. Or Regulus had. Or they both had. And now the only thing he could do was try to recover Regulus' body, almost twenty years too late.
It was bad enough that the specter of his brother-in-heart James insisted on hanging over Moony's wedding. Now the specter of his brother-in-blood had decided to visit as well.
"What was your brother's name?" Penny asked. Sirius was glad that she'd asked an easy question rather than When did you disown each other? or How did he die?
"Regulus."
"That's a nice name."
"As astronomy-textbook names go." He could have gone by Reg or Reggie and passed as a normal human being, but of course Regulus had never wanted to pass as anything but the Heir to the House of Black. Or had he? Sirius was never going to know.
"I think it's sweet that your family had a theme."
"And that is the only time the Black family has ever been called sweet."
"I didn't say the family was sweet. Just the names," said Penny.
Sirius chuckled. "In my horrid ancestral home, there's a family tree that's a real work of art. Or it was until they started blasting off the names of everyone who displeased them. I've restored all of the names that I can remember— I need to get Arthur Weasley to tell me his brothers' names today so I can fix that part of the tree. Regulus' name was never removed, of course. Mine was. But when I retraced his name, it was… well, it reminded me that you can't erase certain things as easily as you might think that you can."
"No," agreed Penny. "I'm glad you decided to fix it instead of destroy it."
"My mother's portrait is the thing I'd like to destroy." The song had ended and they walked from the floor toward the high table. "Unfortunately, there's no way to fix it or destroy it."
"Are you sure?"
"I've tried everything."
"But you're not a portrait specialist, are you?"
"Do you know a portrait specialist?" he challenged.
Penny looked rather victorious. "Let me introduce you to Badeea Ali. She was one of Tulip's roommates at school."
It was hours later—after they'd all eaten and danced and eaten again— when the young woman approached Sirius. She had brown eyes and pale skin and wore a blue-sparkled hijab. "My name is Badeea Ali. Penny said I needed to meet you."
"Does Penny often order you to meet people?" asked Sirius.
"Sometimes," said Badeea. "She's usually right about these things, so I listen. Tell me about your portrait."
"Tell me why I should tell you about my portrait."
She tilted her head as if seriously pondering the merits of his question. "I'm quite good at painting portraits and I know a lot about the spells you need to create them. When I was at Hogwarts, I used to spend hours talking to the portraits every day."
"You wouldn't want to talk to this one." Sirius didn't think he would be able to stand the idea of Badeea talking to his mother's portrait in any case. Badeea was obviously a half-blood if not Muggle-born. The things his mother would say about blood status alone didn't bear contemplation, and as to what she would think of Badeea's hijab… "That's the problem. She was a hateful, bigoted woman and her portrait cannot be stopped from screaming hateful, bigoted things. A silencing charm is barely worth casting. The best I can do is keep her asleep as much as possible, but that still makes the whole building useless."
"Portraits have a piece of the subject in them," said Badeea. "All humans can change, and that means all portraits can change. With the correct spell and enough time, of course."
"She didn't want to change and neither does her portrait."
Badeea's eyes flashed with a keen interest. "I like a challenge if you'll let me try."
To be continued.
Recommendation: White Flags by MarauderLover7. It is story number 9233100 on this site.
Summary: Who'd have thought that the man who tore them apart was the one who brought them together? Head Girl Lily Evans is determined to keep her distance from the Marauders but that's easier said than done when James is Head Boy and in love with her. It also doesn't help that she becomes rather attached to Sirius during an eventful Defence Against the Dark Arts lesson...
MarauderLover7 is better known for Innocent and its sequels, which follow Sirius as he raises Harry. I've been told I'd enjoy them, but a million words seems overwhelming at the moment so I haven't read them. I did, however, manage to read the prequel White Flags, which clocks in at a mere 113K words. What I like most about it is the dynamic between Sirius and James/Lily. Sirius has a relationship with Lily that's simultaneously part of their respective relationships with James and independent of their respective relationships with James. The other Marauders are well-represented, too.