Chapter 35

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Alex's eyes widened when she spotted the woman walking away with Caleb. She hadn't been at the meeting the previous evening, but Alex remembered her from years ago. Emma Rogers had worked closely together with Alex and Jonas on a couple of projects, including the enormous task of sorting files and translations. The work on the steles and what they had recovered from the meeting point was especially on Alex's mind as she watched the other woman talk with Caleb and Hernandez before they vanished into the forest.

"Is that Doctor Rogers?" she asked, hoping for confirmation.

Alex felt Ronon's eyes rest on her, forcing her to turn her head to look at him. Ronon's upper lip twitched and after a moment, he said, almost cautiously: "It is."

Alex let out a long breath. Another person she'd known had made it here. Without meaning to Alex had started a list of people, and she hesitantly added Emma Rogers to it.

A list felt wrong, and if anything, shouldn't they cross the survivors off the list of casualties? A list which would never make it onto a monument for as long as the Stargate Program remained secret?

But there it was. That list. And Alex repeated the names in her head:

Emma Rogers.

Amelia Banks.

Ronon Dex.

Three. It meant there were still seventeen names to be added to that list. The number of possible survivors kept shrinking, and the thought twisted her gut. Who else had made it out of that death trap their Gate Room had become in the final moments of their expedition? Her fingers twitched as she made to reach for Evan's hand, but she forced herself to cross her arms over her chest instead as her eyes followed the patrol teams leaving the clearing.

"Is there any way others might want to talk to us as well?" Evan knew what to say before she could even fathom to find the right words. It was his job and it had never been hers. She'd always relied more on the team leaders to do the talking upon first contact. Only that this wasn't first contact. The low level of hostility still hung heavily in the air. The prospect of returning home must made it even worse for some people.

Halling nodded. "They do," he said. "A couple of refugees only returned here this morning, but we kept most of them out of talks yesterday anyway. The other survivors and their families want to meet with you around noon and I believe afterwards Guide will want to talk with you as well."

Great. A meeting with the Wraith on top of everything else. Well, if that wasn't exactly the thing they needed right now, Alex didn't know what was. After spending the entire morning first in the infirmary and then with Halling, Ronon, Carter and Evan organizing patrols, all Alex wanted to do now was to take a shower and then sit with Grace and Torren.

Again she watched as Evan reacted. This was routine. Even after years of not going through the Gate on a regular basis, he was still the perfect team leader, and it seemed as though, for the first time, she figured that he had been chosen for this position, not just because he had always been good at following orders, but also because he was communicative when he needed to be. He was persuasive. He was well-suited for this job, because he could lead easily, no matter how tired he was. Only the dark shadows under his eyes told the story of how little sleep he'd gotten, but his posture was the same as it had always been when encountering a difficult situation and his blue eyes were full of purpose when he spoke again. "We will come to the village as soon as we can," he promised.

They waited there at the bottom of the ramp until Ronon and Halling were both out of earshot before he gently touched her lower back and his eyes softened when he looked at her again. "Are you okay?"

Alex shook her head. Carter would already be waiting for him in her office. She couldn't take up more of his time. "It'll be alight." The frown on his face almost made her take back the words. "I'm just going to go to the infirmary and check up on the kids. It'll help."

"I'll come up with you."

She could sense there was no use arguing with him about this. Instead, she slipped her hand into his. There wasn't anyone looking at them right now anyway.

Jonas rubbed his nose with the inside of his elbow. His eyes were fixed on Sheppard. "How's Torren dealing with it all?"

"Well..." Sheppard cleared his throat. "I think he likes me. I'm just worried about what his father is gonna say when we get back and I've bonded with him."

"Well," Evan said, "Kanaan and Teyla separated two years ago… and it's not like you're replacing him. We'll be back there." Keep it up, old boy, the voice in his head muttered. It's already been six months and we haven't heard back from the IOA yet. "And you started dating her half a year later. I mean, it's just natural that he's bonding with you, right?"

"Oh, have another beer, Daddy," Sheppard muttered grumpily.

Two weeks away from it all. That was more than any one of them could have asked for. And if he was honest, he had expected about anything after their return from that disastrous last mission but the break Landry insisted on. The only good thing that could be said about the trip to P3-S351 was that nobody had died. At least they'd managed to blow up one of the Furlings' ships. That wasn't nothing. It wasn't good either though, given they'd blown an informants' cover and risked the lives of the entire population of that planet. Given that this was supposed to be nothing but a mere recon mission lasting three days maximum, with the added bonus of a bit of archaeological digging for Alex and Jonas, things had turned quite sour indeed.

And now here they were, in a holiday home in Northern Italy. They hadn't told anyone outside their teams that they were going on a spontaneous vacation, or Alex's mother would have insisted they visit them, or Evan's family would have dropped by in Colorado Springs. No, what they needed was some time to themselves with friends. Too bad Murdoch and Anna had decided to visit Murdoch's parents instead.

Evan couldn't quite remember when exactly Sheppard had entered that circle of friend. Probably around the same time the children had started playing together and Sheppard had become Teyla's significant other. Life was weird sometimes. Or had it been before that? The truth was, Evan had always liked the Colonel.

With a slight nod, Evan took the cold bottle Sheppard had already opened for him while he kept stirring the sauce. "Thanks." Evan took a short sip. He remembered all too well the last time he had had a beer with Jonas and Sheppard. Murdoch had been there as well then, as had been McKay, Woolsey and Beckett. Somehow they had all shown up more or less at the same time in the Daedalus' commissary the first night aboard the ship after they all started to realize the utter defeat and the loss of their expedition members. It'd been a quiet occasion then.

"They've been out forever, huh?" Jonas said, grating the last bit of cheese into a bowl.

"The beach isn't further than ten minutes, but I guess they have to haul them back now," Sheppard said with a slight grin. He was leaning against the counter.

"Well, this is gonna take at least another hour," Evan said, taking a step back to turn down the heat. He threw a quick look out the window, at the burnt grass and the woodstove on the paved terrace. The moment Alex had seen it, her eyes had started to glow and for a second there Evan thought he'd have to build one in their backyard. And then he remembered they would return to Pegasus once this war was over and won… if that ever happened. He quickly pushed the thought away and focused back on the sauce.

"An hour?!" Sheppard exclaimed incredulously, his eyes wide. "Are you kidding me? That sauce looks ready to me. Just look! Everything's in. And you've been stirring forever."

At this Evan couldn't hold back a smile. "Just because everything's in, doesn't mean it's ready. This sauce needs to simmer and I haven't even started on the bechamel." He almost snuck in a "sir" but he quickly bit it back. Sheppard wouldn't like that. Not in their current situation. Not on holiday.

"I can do that."

"No," Evan said firmly with a furrowed brow. If he wanted anyone to mess up one of the sauces, he'd ask Alex. "Get the pasta if you want to help at all."

"Wow," Sheppard breathed, exchanging a glance with Jonas, who merely grinned. "Off-duty Lorne is bossy."

"On-duty Lorne can be bossy, too," Jonas said. "You just never notice on missions, because McKay is hogging all the attention."

"Huh." Sheppard reached for a spoon from the jar of utensils on the counter, dipped it into the sauce and slipped the spoon into his mouth. "Tastes good by the way." He lifted the spoon in appreciation, waved it around once and made to dip it in again, when Evan slapped his hand, before the metal could break the dark red surface. "Wow! Would you've done that to Alex as well?"

"No, my wife knows she has to get a new spoon," Evan said, grinning at the pot. He had to admit, being around his former commanding officer in his free time had taken some getting used to. But things had changed. They were both holding the same rank now, were both leading a team at the SGC and had both been part of that disastrous recent mission.

"I'm pretty damn sure you don't slap your wife, Lorne."

"Well, you're not my wife, Sheppard." Evan carefully placed the spoon on the pot and nodded at Jonas who handed him the next pot for the bechamel. They might have only been back on Earth for half a year, but already Jonas and his wife Amanda had moved into a house not far away from him and Alex and the two of them had been over plenty of times. Jonas knew exactly what Evan needed at what point when he was making lasagna.

"You two are cute," Jonas said before Sheppard had the chance to shoot something back. "Should I tell Alex and Teyla, or would you like to do that yourselves?"

"Nah, I'd better do that myself." Sheppard slapped Evan on the shoulder. "Here they come."

Evan followed his gaze to the huge windows overlooking the garden and the first thing he saw was that Alex was carrying Caleb and that his son was crying. His heart sank, but Jonas was by the door before he even had the chance to move.

Torren was through the door first, helping Jonas hold it open for Alex and Caleb. His son's cries were heart breaking and the moment Alex stepped inside, he saw the rash underneath his foot. "Baking soda!" Amanda shouted at Jonas, who immediately jumped into action while Evan rushed forward.

Alex carefully put Caleb down on the counter while Teyla ushered Grace and Lucas into the next room. Out of the corner of his eye Evan saw Torren clinging to Sheppard's pant leg.

"It's okay, honey," he heard Alex say as Evan carefully lifted Caleb's leg.

"It hurts, Dad!" Caleb wailed and Evan nodded, ignoring the tears shooting into his own eyes when he saw the sensitive skin tainted with dark red pustules.

"Jellyfish?" he asked quietly, looking up into the flushed face. Caleb's eyes were so wide he could barely make out the blue. The imprints of the thin arms were clearly visible.

"Amanda already treated it with sea water when he stepped into it," Alex said, her voice calmer than his own had been.

Caleb couldn't form any more words, but kept crying, his pudgy hands covering his eyes. Next second Amanda was beside Evan, holding a small bowl with a whitish paste. "What is it?" he asked as Amanda gently pushed him away and patted Caleb's cheek.

"It'll be okay," she said again. "Remember that sea water made it better already?"

Caleb nodded, though he wouldn't look at her.

"Sea water and baking soda," Amanda said quietly as she lifted Caleb's foot again to look at it. Boy, was he glad Amanda was a nurse. "Works miracles."

"Dad? Is Caleb gonna be okay?"

It wasn't Grace who had spoken. Or Lucas.

Evan turned his head.

Torren was still holding the fabric of Sheppard's leg, looking up at the man who had stepped into his life as a father figure some time ago, his lip trembling. Evan watched as Sheppard stared at Torren open-mouthed and carefully knelt next to him, his lips parting and closing as he returned Torren's gaze.

Evan's head snapped around when Caleb's hand dug into his shirt. Without waiting Caleb to ask for it, he threw his arm around his boy's tiny shoulders, who clutched at him, sobbing loudly as Amanda applied the salve.

"Daddy?" Torren asked.

Sheppard pulled a face and nodded. "He'll be okay," he said hoarsely and he visibly forced himself to accept that name. Because, how on Earth was he supposed to tell this boy not to call him that?

Torren and Grace were both awake when Alex and Evan entered the infirmary. Their heads turned around to the door the moment they stepped inside.

"How is everything?" Evan asked casually as he approached the beds.

"Headache's as good as gone," Torren answered, his eyes clear and wide awake. Montgomery was nowhere to be seen and in a way Evan was relieved to be alone with the three of them.

"Good to hear." Alex brushed her hand over Grace's cheek and sat down on the edge of the bed.

"Montgomery said we could go back to active duty tomorrow."

Evan realized too late he was pulling a face and he silently cursed himself for it. He knew he should stop babying his daughter. "We'll see," he said evasively and he watched as Grace's expression shifted from defiant to merely annoyed. Well, that was something. And he decided to keep himself from scolding the two of them until they were fully back on their feet.

"There are a couple of Earth names on the steles in the graveyard," Grace said and Evan nodded. What else should he have expected? But his eyes shifted to Torren. He didn't have to guess why the boy had made his way there. Torren had been shown around the village before anyone else, and rightly so. His parents were Athosians, so he should have been the first to meet as many people as possible. And one person at least hadn't been among those in the settlement.

"Who?" he heard Alex say, her voice trembling slightly, but Evan held Torren's gaze.

"I don't remember all of them," Grace said, brushing her hand over her eyes. "There was a French name… an Italian name… I'd have to go back."

"We will," Alex said quietly, touching Grace's forehead.

"Now I think about it, that place looked familiar."

"Grace." Alex shook her head. "You've been unconscious for a while. Get some rest. Things will look different in the morning, I promise."

"My father," Torren said hoarsely, his brown eyes dark with sorrow. "Kanaan."

Evan swallowed hard. What it must feel like to find that someone who had loved you and must have thought about you every single day was dead and you didn't remember that person at all. "I'm sorry, Torren," he said sincerely. "He was a good man."

Torren nodded and looked up at the ceiling again.

A/N: So, I learned something about treating jellyfish stings while writing this. Writing is the perfect opportunity to keep learning, be it about the medicinal uses of baking soda or getting rid of a body (something I learned on Breaking Bad: do NOT dissolve the body in acid in your bathtub! WE ALL KNOW THAT NOW!)

Thank you so much for reading and commenting! I wanted to keep working on the actual storyline, but I keep distracting myself with heart warming and/or painful flashbacks. Please forgive me. But I had this insane idea of skipping almost thirty years back when I started working on this…