Puffgirl1952 the 2nd: yeah pretty much, had to add some humor to it considering. Lol
Princesakarlita411: yeah she is. 😊
SerenityxEndymion: hey not a problem. I getcha, I think I have read some of that author's stories. And yeah Naru was needed in this story to have this transition.
LoveInTheBattleField: no problem.
Jovemako: yeah Naru was great and of course how she'd notice Usagi's lack of presence around. As for Mamoru, there with be a twist before the end that's coming up soon…real soon.
CassieRaven: its gonna get both worse and better, you'll see what I mean. Mamoru is gonna get hit with it again before things change. And yes they do.
Joanne Frances Tiano Cajilig: well even in the anime it was left implied that she knew but it was never expressed. I just put it out there. But yes besties and Naru is smarter than she appears to be.
AimlesslyGera: it was in his head, not said on hers since it was a time difference. It kinda jumps around a bit.
karseneau1: thanks you, no problem and his view needed to be seen to.
Rjzero00: yeah I don't think she should have been let out either. Would have saved a lot of headaches to be honest. As for the butterfly effect yes Pluto is playing with fire on it BUT I think as long as Chronos allows it to happen it can be accepted. Or something to that effect. I know for sure one of the taboos is to freeze/stop time. Or/and to use a time key without permission. I remember for the longest time Pluto wasn't allowed to leave the gates of time till the death busters arrived so allowances were made for certain situations I guess. As for Mamoru getting help that's going to be touched up on in the next coming chapter. Glad you like the interactions though as there's more to come.
10 reviews nice, there's only a couple at best now chapters left, then this is over everyone. I'm shocked its lasted this long. Now I do have a few request ideas but its like one idea for each one so I don't know which one to pick at this point, I might choose one of them or go with something already pre-set up I don't know yet, in the mean time please read and review!
Breaking point ch.35
Minako POV
When I got off the phone with Mamoru, I was honestly a bit scared. Usagi was clearly much more upset that I had anticipated, I mean I knew she would be, but this was a level I hadn't thought of. I immediately tried to get ahold of her. Tried to tell her things from our side of things, but it was mute as her phone just went to voicemail. I knew she didn't turn her phone off since it still rung before the voicemail but still it meant she was ignoring the calls and to ignore mine considering everything we'd been through I was worried.
I really should have tried to find a way to tell her sooner what happened. The girls insisted on it, Mamoru insisted on it, yet I still used my position to pressure them in a sense to NOT tell her anything and it may have truly backfired in our faces. I used my senses to see if their red string of destiny was still strong as it had been getting stronger and while it was unmoving it looked more fragile than before.
I bit the inside of my mouth as my nerves were beginning to get the better of me as I called the girls, knowing Usagi wasn't going to pick up at this point, and put them all on speaker when they answered, "What's up?" Makoto asked as Ami and Rei soon joined in, "She knows." Was all I had to say to get the shocked reactions I was expecting. "Are you serious? How?!" Makoto asked while Ami asked, "How did she respond?"
I let out a sigh, "Not good." Was all I could get out, "She's not picking up my calls." I admit as Ami regretfully says, "I knew we should have told her sooner." As Rei added in with, "what's done is done, how do we fix this?" I rubbed my temples as I tried to think of a solution to this problem at hand. "Right now, I don't know, I'm picking everyone's brains right now cause my original plan is now tossed out the window regardless."
I see Artemis pop in looking at me in question. I wordlessly tell him 'she knows'. He sees the worried look on my face as he gains an 'oh no, this doesn't look good' expression on his face as he walks closer towards me. "As of right now Mamoru is trying to find her to explain things to her more in depth." I tell them as he gets up on the bed where I am, "Great so one of the main reasons why she's fled to begin with is now out there looking for her." Rei muttered and I agree it may not be the best plan.
However… "He does have that connection link with her, he should be able to find her unless you Rei can get a read on where she is." I subtly ask her hoping we can find her quicker and fix this mess up. "I can do a fire reading to try to find out, I usually look for enemies with it and don't usually use it to find one of our own but it's worth a shot." She agrees, "Okay let us know if you get anything." I tell her as she gets off the line.
"What about us, what can we do?" Ami asks, "I think for the rest of us we could get out there and look for her to." I suggest. "Isn't Mamoru already looking for her?" Makoto asked. "Yes." I answer as I wonder where she's taking this, "As much as I hate to say this, but maybe this is something that he needs to finish doing." Makoto suggests. I pause on the phone as Ami even agree saying, "It makes sense."
Now I'm a bit poleaxed, "Explain?" I ask of her, "Mamoru has been getting our help from the start of this really. Whether we like it or not we have been helping him in little ways to get her back." I wonder how much we actually have been helping him now as Makoto talks. "Think about it, Mamoru startled to flail and instead of letting him find his own footing we helped out a bit here and there." That is true I realize.
"If we go out there and find her then what? We stop her from leaving the area so that he can explain things as we can too?" that was the plan…now. "Make her feel boxed in and unable to escape or feel that she's being pressured into being with him even by us? That choice needs to feel naturally her own and not something conceived by us all being there to help him yet again to find her." Makoto says as I see where she's coming from. Mamoru did eventually receive help from all of us at one point or another.
"She's got a point, we all talked to Mamoru at one point or another to get the ball rolling." Ami adds on, though I don't think Rei and he ever talked about Usagi. She was more of an antagonist at the time. At least not in a sense where she was helpful towards Usagi. Part of me wondered if she could be helpful in this matter since her relationship with Usagi did improve. but in the end Makoto and Ami did have valid points.
"If we go there, she'll see it as us backing him up again when really it should be us backing her up and respecting her decisions to be made. She'd do the same for us." She was right and I had to admit to the fact that we really didn't have much of a choice. We had to back off and let Mamoru handle this issue himself. "We still do need to do one thing though." I tell them as I reside to accepting that decision.
"What's that?" Ami asks, "Come to terms with our own culpability in this. We messed up to and we need to face judgement. Not really you guys since you were following my orders, but we did mess up." I admit, "I messed up." I express further. I hear silence on the line before Makoto breaks it by saying, "No we all did…" I look at the phone in question before speaking again, "Come again?" I asked.
"We could have ruled against you in favor of telling Usagi." She continues on as I hadn't thought about it. "She's right, we could have, with Rei involved, overruled your decision if we felt that it was causing harm to Usagi in any form." That thought never struck me as we had never experienced it before. They could have overruled my decision IF in fact the majority ruled that it would cause harm onto Usagi.
Well in the technical sense, as it was our duty to protect our princess it was also in our duty to make sure that no harm come to her even if it was from within. In this case since Usagi was harmed, though it was more emotional and mental rather than physical, IF it could have resulted in a physical pain then the senshi would have had the full rights to disobey the order if it could have caused harm to our future Queen.
In this case, senshi related or not, our actions, the ones that I ordered and stuck to did cause Usagi pain. I think the only real technicality here is that since it was emotional and mental versus physical, that's the only reason I would still be able to over-rule them. After all there's nothing that could indicate so far that Usagi would be in physical harm's way over this decision made. As least I hoped so.
I debated on telling them for a moment before I realized that it was better to be honest about this than not, "Technically speaking I could still over rule you all considering it wasn't harmful in a physical way. This decision wouldn't have hurt her physically." I tell them, "Wouldn't matter." Makoto's words next floored me, "The moment we would have felt anything threatening Usagi, even if it wasn't physical, we would have abstained from continuing forward." I was stunned as she continued on.
"We reserve the rights, not just as senshi, but as her close friends to be there for her. To guide her the way we would hope to avoid her from going into conflict that she couldn't handle. It's just called being a good friend. Usagi's handled a lot of crap from all of us over time. She's dealt with a lot, this may not be a drop in the bucket for her to us, it may be her breaking point with us, but it doesn't mean we'll ever stop loving her or caring about her." I know she's right on every level she's on.
"She's right, and if we were to go out there it would only showcase to Usagi that once again we don't trust her to make the right call, when that's all she's ever done. Make the hard right call. I know it'll be hard, but we need to step back and let Mamoru find her himself. Let him figure this out for himself going forward. Only then will all of us know if it's truly meant to be for them." I sigh as I see her point to.
"Then as the very least once Rei finds her location we will go, but…" I pause for a moment to prevent their protests, "We won't do anything to guide the other. It'll be up to her and him to make the right choice that's best for them both. No more destiny interfering. No more guidance from us. We'll just watch and see what happens and respect what happens and be there for her no matter the results."
The girls agreed with me, "That sounds appropriate. We do definitely need to be far enough away to avoid either of them from spotting us." Ami states logically. "Once Rei calls back with some information, we can inform her on what's going on and go from there." That's when I see Rei's name flash across the screen waiting to be picked up, "Time to see if Mamoru will sink or float." I reply as push the button to join Rei in.
Usagi POV
I sat on the ground by the pier as I watched birds chirping and listened to the quiet hum of nature around me. My thoughts were less turbulent than before. Naru's words helping to make me see things more clearly than before and making me glad that confided in her about our secret life to as her opinions do matter to me. I realize now let my anger get the better of me for a little bit and now I needed to do some deep reflecting on it.
So when I saw Chibi Usa out of the corner of my eyes coming up to me from the trees near the road I was admittedly shocked to see her, "What are you doing out here?" it was late at night and she should he at home in bed not out here. Truthfully I would have thought that she'd be tucked away in Mamoru's bed while he tried to call me. To which I purposely avoided his calls as I was to upset with him at the time to answer.
She looked worried before, but now she looked different, less worried and more resolute. "I went looking for you when Mamo – chan had me leave." She admitted making me also shocked that Mamoru had her leave his place to begin with, "I had to use Luna P to find you, something I didn't know she could do, but it worked." It made me wonder if he was around here somewhere as I quickly darted my eyes around.
"Does he know you're here?" I hoped not, I suddenly came up with the wonderment that may be this was a ploy or something. "No, he has no idea where you are. I'm alone here." She assures me as she waved her hands around to showcase that he in fact didn't know where I was. I then asked her, "Why?" she walked up to me. "Cause I've been really terrible to you and you didn't really deserve it."
I arched a brow to her as it hit me that she was having a moment of self-discovery. She was realizing her faults on another level cause before this she really hasn't come to me to apologize yet, "I let my anger of what I thought was good reason in the future get the better of me so often here and didn't think about how it affected other people." I almost couldn't help the smile that threatened to erupt on my face considering I did something similar recently.
"When I first got here, I was scared and was on a mission to save my mama." She looked at the water now herself, "Despite what I did and how I acted you were always only ever trying to protect me and guide me, and I made things worse for you." This was true, "I hurt your feelings and made you feel bad even after all the nice things you did for me." I saw the emotions pass over her face.
"Then even after I was taken by Wiseman you still fought for me, got me back and I barely treated you any better. If anything, I got worse." I noticed she was upset with herself over this and while one part of me wanted to comfort her this wasn't something needed for that. She needed to get this out. "It wasn't right and while before I knew I was causing grief onto you lately I've been feeling it more and more so." She admits.
"I'm sorry for everything, I really should have tried harder to listen to you more early on. Had I put more trust into you earlier I might have gotten back to my mother in the future faster. I might have not been so trusting of the Wiseman and let him play his mind tricks on me." I was stunned to hear this from her as I motioned for her to sit next to me, hoping I wasn't inviting an argument along with it.
She came closer to me as she huddles herself between her knees, "He would have killed me, and you stopped it. You did so much for me, and I didn't do hardly anything for you." This was all true and to hear her acknowledge it tells me she's making definite progress. "You did do all of those things." I watch her face as she bends her head down in acceptance of her wrong doings towards me.
"You hurt my feelings time and time again, you piled on when Rei did to…down right cruel at times…" I add on as she burrows her head in her lap, "You made life miserable for me at home at times…anything to get me into trouble." her shoulders sunk in, "I know…." She muttered as I then asked her, "During that time how did that make you feel?" throwing her a bit off as I knew she wasn't expecting that.
She looks up to me afraid to answer only to see me 'go on' look, "Good." She gives me, "And now?" I ask her, "I feel bad. Pained that I hurt you. Like I can't figure out why I was so angry before. They weren't things to feel so easily angered about." I smile, "It's because the level of power you had in you. That added with how your growing up here and how your grow up in the future." She looks to me.
"You had a privileged lifestyle in the future till my 'future self' wanted you to learn more independence in the simplest of forms. You missed being 'entitled' and being 'extra special' and you definitely didn't get that here, so you retaliated on the one person whom you felt was most responsible for it." I told her simply, "But isn't that something that bad guys sometimes do?" she asked, probably recalling her time as wicked lady.
I had to treated carefully here so that she understood how that worked out. Cause while yes, she was evil for a period of time, she wasn't born that or made that way. Much like Mamoru was manipulated and brainwashed into being evil for the time that he was, she herself was brainwashed and manipulated by a great evil force. It wasn't something that either of them asked for, granted both cases started out differently, but still they had similarities.
His being that he was terribly injured and was kidnapped from me once we discovered who we really were and she was an emotional child caught unawares and able to be deceived quickly since the Wiseman exploited her worst fears on her and she sub come to them as any child could or would. A cowardly move in my opinion to go after a child merely because she has power and all of a sudden becomes useful to you. That doesn't speak of a great dark power, that speaks of a rat to me…a cowardly rat.
Wiseman was more coward that any previous enemy we had. Hiding behind his robes and using others to his will. He may have been clever to a degree to be able to manipulate an entire family clan in his war against us, but in the end when he showed his true colors as seeing them as expendable to HIS cause he lost the rest of their loyalty and had to fight them himself. It was jus sad that the few that saw him for the monster he was lost their lives to him when they could have been redeemed.
That was when he met his match in all of us. We fought him off in the end and showed him what happens when you mess with the other side of the moon. Cowardly doesn't win you anything in the end. Just a painful death. "Yes, but the difference is at the end of the day you can see where you went wrong and as you just expressed your regret and understanding of the pain you caused. Real bad guys can't." I explain to her as she looks unconvinced.
"Bad guys, real true bad guys don't care about the pain they cause. In fact they would even revel in it, enjoy the pain their inflicting onto someone else and that's whether or not they have a lot of power. My point is, is that you expressed a level of care and regret in it, you showed me remorse over your actions and verbiage. Bad guys, true bad guys don't care." I had run into my fair share of them since I became a senshi so I knew how bad guys could be.
Beryl held no regrets and risked her life for what she wanted and since she couldn't have Mamoru, she chose my death and the destruction of the world instead as an outlet for her anger over events. She wanted to get even and was unable to accept her failure even after everything she'd done to obtain what she truly wanted. Power over the earth that was denied to her in the past and the present and Mamoru. Even when the truth of it starred her in the face, she refused to accept and in the end, it killed her.
Remembering that really made me also think about how she did so much to get what she wanted and how in the end all it did was make things worse for everyone. Two kingdoms destroyed and yet technically she was manipulated to. Queen Metallia had her by the balls…so to speak, and to get what she wanted she let her in and gave her what she asked for. "They only care about their own purpose and goals, no matter the cost." I tell her.
"Like when Wiseman took me and wanted to use me as a power conduit for the dark crystal. I hadn't cared at the time, but that power could have killed me." she states as I sigh, "It would have killed you." She looked up at me startled that I would say it, "Your very powerful yes, but you have no real control over your powers." I could tell she was startled by the admission from me but it was true.
"Wiseman sought to exploit that and knew you couldn't handle it. He was counting on the power going through you added to your own power to decimate the world with your lack of control. Your emotions at that time were contorted and twisted into what he put inside of your mind so you were more reckless and less concerned with what could or would have happen." I looked down at her hurt expression.
"It would have destroyed you and the earth but it's what he wanted regardless." I think while she knew in the end that the was bad she may have wanted to think in some form that since Diamond wasn't completely evil, despite his record, that perhaps Wiseman wasn't completely either, truth was he was bad. From what I had been told about him by the king when we were there, he had seen my future self as a blasphemy for being of Lunarian blood line and giving people of earth loner life spans.
He seeded this belief into the black moon clan's minds to make them want to go against us to so he could have them work for him. "Bad guys have needs and wants to Chibi Usa. We just don't agree with destroying all life because we feed the earth as the earth feeds us. We protect this world and others that are around it cause we all need each other. The Wiseman made a critical error though when it came to you." She looked to me, "What's that?" I smiled, "He didn't count on how deep the bond between parents and children could be."
She held her head higher, "I'm sorry about that to." She tells me, "I shouldn't have gotten between you and Mamo – chan so often. I really messed up my own future with it. I got carried away and hurt my own future. I hurt those that I love." She cried as I pulled her to me, unable to stop the need to want to comfort her now, "You still have time to change though and you already have." I tell her.
She wept, "I thought I was, then I saw how my being here was effecting you still. I think I need to go home. To tell mama what happened and accept my punishment." She said. I was shocked by her words. She may not have seen it but to tell me that spoke of real growth and progress. I believed there may be hope for her yet as I held her. Unfortunately, it also spoke to me of the unresolved issue between Mamoru and I. I came here to think in silence and yet I've come to see that if Chibi Usa can admit to fault over her actions then maybe…
I wipe the stray tear from my eye as she stands up and pulls out the time key. She looks at it as if debating on what she just stated she would do. Not that I doubt her, if I were her, I'd want to be home to and not with my past parents. Don't get me wrong I love my parents but to meet them in the past is one thing, to live them and get to know them in the past when their a few years older than myself is completely different.
I know Chibi Usa likes it here but I'm willing to bet anything she really misses her parents and her friends. "Chibi Usa…" I start as she looks to me, "You have to finish your training down here." I tell her. As much as I would love for her to be back with them, she did come down here for a purpose. "Besides I told you before myself, the decision to make you go back home was between Mamoru and I."
I tell her. She looks to me, "But I want to go back home and see mama…one last time at least…" I wonder what she means by that when I see her form looking slightly see through as she tries to hold in her tears. It occurs to me that while yes Mamoru and I made that decision it's only conclusive when we're working together. Is my being out here working with him? Or can it be seen as running away.
I go to touch her form and can feel my hand pass through her. I see the real tears in her eyes and I briefly wondered if this is what Mamoru felt when she was disappearing in front of him in the park that day. The fear that you can't do anything really. There's only so much a person in our position can do. When she becomes solid again, I grasp onto her and tell her, "No matter what Chibi Usa, we will always love you."
She nods in acceptance. "I will always love all of you to…no matter what. I accept my responsibility in this and hope someday you'll find your way back to him, and if not that you'll find happiness no matter what. You've earned it." I can't help the tears that come to my eyes as I hear her heart felt words. She didn't care anymore about being born, she just wanted me to be happy. I had never heard more selfless words from her mouth.
"Go home, to my parents." It was a silence but gentle order as she sighed, "Usagi…" I looked pointedly at her, "I'm not asking Chibi Usa, their probably worried sick. Don't make them worry any more than they already have. You owe them that much." I order as she resigns and goes back in the direction she came. Whether she wants to go home or not, it wouldn't be fair to leave my parents high and dry right now.
They deserved better than that. They treated her as if she were their own since she's been here and made sure she was given everything a growing happy child needs to flourish and feel at home. I know when she's in the future that she has a much bigger 'residence' to run through but sending her back here, so that she can learn another way of where she came from is highly important to. I understand more than she does as to why my 'future self' sent her here and in time she will understand to.
I debate on what to do next for a moment. The conversations going on and around in my head nearly give me a headache as I sigh. I knew in my heart what I needed to do, or rather who I needed to talk to. I know he's still looking for me and he won't remember this place with ease considering how many technical first kisses we've shared. It's why I picked this spot, it would take him a moment to figure out.
As I get up from the ground, prepared to leave to find him I hear my name being called out. For a moment I'm hopeful on who it could be till I turn my head in time to see a stunned but happy Tyler coming up to me. I admittedly deflate a bit as I was hoping it was Mamoru, but put on a smile seeing him coming by but know that while I do need to talk to him as well I just wasn't in the mood to do it now.
"Might as well get it over with." I mutter as I greet him. "Hey how have you been?" he asks me giving me a hug. I hugged him back as I respond, "I'm okay, Mamoru and I had a small argument but I might have blown things a tad out of proportion." I admit, not sure why I did but I did. "Sorry to hear that." He looks genuine about it but I can see hope blooming behind his eyes at the possibilities.
I have to nip this in the bud. "Have a seat with me." I suggest. He sits down on the ground with me as I start to talk, "Mamoru and I started to date again." I admit as he looks to me a tad awkwardly. "Are you two back together?" he asks timidly. "For a moment yeah, then the argument hit and now…" I look around, "Now I'm here, in a park." I then look to him, "Maybe it's a sign that things aren't meant to be with him." I furrow my brows towards him as he continues on.
"Think about it, the man drove you away…again. Usagi…" Tyler turned towards me as I do admit he has a slight point in that, "I hate to be brash about this as I'm not in the relationship so I can't speak for him or you, but from my perspective, how many times does it take of him messing up to make you see that things may not be as their supposed to between you to?" I sigh as I contemplate his words. "I may have overreacted though." I admit to him, "You don't seem like the type of person that would over react." He tells me.
"In this case I may have and I know we need to talk about things. I want to work things out between us." I confide as I look to him, "I love him and I always will. Even when he does stupid crap it won't stop me from loving him." I give a halfhearted chuckle. "I know it sounds dumb but even if we weren't together, I would still love him." I can sense Tyler tensing up beside me, "I know you may not want to hear this but it's true." I express to him.
"I know…I just feel like you deserve better than him." he looks to me then as if he wants to kiss me, but doesn't act on it. Perhaps I appear to guarded right now, I wasn't sure, but I was glad he didn't try to kiss me. I didn't want to be mean seeing as we had kissed before, but things were different now. I knew it would feel wrong to let him kiss me when Mamoru and I were working things out and only had one argument.
Even if the argument had been big. So when his hand touched mine I barely let it as things felt different between us now. Even as friends. At one point I did feel a kinship with him that he was sweet and cute, but now, now it seemed like my loneliness has affected me more than I originally thought it had. Tyler and I were never meant to be anything more than friends, even if Mamoru and I weren't together.
I felt bad as I realized this as Tyler hadn't asked for this as I hadn't either. "Perhaps so…but it doesn't stop me from feeling as I do about him." I resign as I feel the need to in some form back Mamoru up, "Don't get me wrong, were not at a hundred percent, but were getting there and we've come a long way already." I tell him as I look out at the lake. Memories of that kiss come to mind as I hear Tyler say more than ask, "It was never going to happen between us was it?" I looked over at his accepted but defeated face.
I couldn't stop the sad expression from crossing over my face, "Sorry…I wish I had a different response for you but truth is, while yeah I do see what attraction there is, my heart will always belong to him." I look back out on to the lake, "I don't know if you believe in fate but I do believe that he and I were fated together." Ignoring all the past and future life stuff though. I can sense the hesitation to respond to it so I explain.
"When Mamoru and I first met we were kids, young kids." I didn't bother to explain how that happened as it was a long time ago and he didn't need to know Mamoru's back history like that, he and Mamoru weren't exactly friends, not by any real measure or anything and it wasn't exactly my history to tell. Even if I was a part of it. "Then we met a few years ago again and things went from there." I tell him as he nods.
"Got it…perhaps you were fated…or perhaps it was co-incidence that brought you two together twice over." I look over at him. If only he knew it had been more than twice, then again come to think of it… "Actually…" I voice, "We met several times…" in this life…I add mentally, "After we first met as we are now we kept running into each other. We even started to accuse the other of following the other around." I laugh off even as at the time I accused him since Luna and I were talking and it was before we knew who we really were.
I didn't want him to know so I tried to accuse to throw him off and dart away. He then accused me when I caught him at events that I was at. We were constantly running into one another, making me now wonder how much fate had a part to play in it if that was the case. "Wow, that is pretty co-incidental…could almost be taken as stalking if you think about it…" I look to him sharply, "But he doesn't seem like that type of guy so…yeah…" I hadn't meant to shot him a look to cut him off but Mamoru wasn't the stalker type.
"On the other hand he did happen to find us when we were kissing…" he mentions. I had to resist explaining that since I couldn't without a reasonable explanation. That I couldn't prove right now though. Mamoru found me that day due to our connection and someone blabbing that I was out with him and friends. "He was out in the area already when he happened upon us." I told him quickly, hoping he'd buy it.
My subconscious defending Mamoru knowing why I had to. "I know you want to defend him it just seems a bit fishy to me is all." He tells me as I resist the urge to respond. I had to get him off that subject. Before I can say anything though he tells me, "While I may not truly believe in fate I am glad that we met. Even if this is the outcome." I smiled grateful for the change of topic and heartily agree with him.
"Yeah me to." I tell him in all earnestly. "Still friends?" I ask, hoping that we can be, "Yeah…I mean you still babysit my nephew so of course. Plus I like having you around." I smile glad that that was for the most part dealt with. "And plus you never know, maybe things will change in a while or a few years. You might find me irresistible." He chuckled as I laugh along with him, "We'll cross that bridge when we get to it." I respond as we both get up. We pull each other in for a friendly hug.
It feels good to have talked to him now, to get that sorted out. As we begin to part ways I can't help but smile and giggle a bit as he takes my hand in his and in a slightly exaggerated move takes my hand in his to kiss it, "Well, my sweet Usagi, I should be off as I'm sure you have things to do." I laugh and agree, "As I'm sure you do to." He smiles, "True. See you around Usagi." We come back in for one last hug before we part ways.
Mamoru POV
I knew I had to find her before she would seek him out. I didn't want that to happen. I couldn't lose her again. I've had far too may close calls for my liking already, I DIDN'T want to make this habitual. I took off running for the general direction, I avoided using the link so I could for once prove to myself that in my gut I knew where she was…and that I knew which kiss she meant in reference to.
I hoped over benches, dodged trees, ran past people yelling at me to watch where I was going, and nearly collided with a hot dog vendor in my path. As tempted as I was to turn into my caped crusader form I didn't want her to sense me coming and hop off again. While I wasn't sure if she could sense me I wasn't about to take the chance. Though I do have to admit chasing her around like this is starting to make me feel like I'm in wonderland chasing after the rabbit that keeps hoping away.
Usagi would be my rabbit though. Only I'm not in wonderland and she's not hopping…well literally speaking she's not hopping away. However it doesn't mean that she's still not elusive and knows where to hide. I stop as I catch my breath, needing to find my bearings as I focus on the earth to help guide me. I feel a shift in the wind as it blows towards my left. Taking this as a sign I follow it and start to run again.
I only start to slow down when I avoid running into people on their own jogs. That's when I find myself in the park where we had our first kiss. I remembered now as I smiled upon reflection of the sweet times we shared while here the last time. I start to scan the area for her form hoping to find her. So far I wasn't seeing any signs of her signature style of hair as I started to jog around the park.
If it weren't for my own morning jogs I'd be huffing right now. I never realized how big this park was until just now. As I keep looking around for her I realize that I'm on the other side of the park. The part where we kissed was by the docks. I cursed myself for looking aimlessly for her while I could have been running straight towards her. I took off and finally managed to make it to the hilly area where the slop ran towards the docks.
It was there that I felt my knees become weak. I was too far away to hear anything even remotely close to sound from them. The sound of joggers and bikes going along were louder than hearing them but I saw them. I saw them. I saw her and him hugging. So at ease in the hug to that I ached for her to have her arms wrapped around me like she used to. I could feel my knees tremble, could hear passerby's warning me to get off the path I had run onto on the hill as I couldn't stop staring at the sight before me.
My throat and mouth went dry. I watched them hug before they parted and him kissing her hand in a romantic way that had her smiling at the simple action before they hugged again…the hugs were to long for me to handle. I always knew he'd go after her when her guard was down. He did exactly as I felt he would have done and I witnessed him stealing her from me. It was one of the worst feelings ever.
Loosing someone you love in front of you. I walked a few steps felt my knees give out. I slipped back to sitting down on the grassy ground. The first time I caught a kiss between on that night so long ago now, then I was full of jealousy and rage. Such anger that I couldn't process how my actions could have affected me or others that day as I had reacted without thinking and punched him, made demands of her and halted my progress to getting her back.
Still didn't regret it but now wasn't the time to think that way. However, with everything that's happened since then I felt jealousy sure, who wouldn't at seeing what I just saw, but I felt no rage. Anger yes towards him, it was slowly building in me, but no rage. Not yet at least. I lost my will to move as I saw them part ways and walk off in different directions. I knew my chance to go to her was now.
I knew I had to get up off my ass and run to her, catch up with her. Tell her that I love her and that I didn't want to lie, that I know I messed up and so much more, but the adrenaline that pumped in me previously was dissipating fast now. I felt like a car that lost its last bit of gas and was now on the side of the road. Unable to move any more. I even tried to force myself to move but I merely stumbled.
The emotions coursing through me made it hard to force myself to simply stand up. I had lost her and once more it was because of my own idiocy. She was right that I could have made my own choice to tell her sooner, and yeah I followed Minako's orders but truth is, I was also afraid to tell her the truth. Afraid of how she'd react, so like a scared little kid I kept it to myself and hide the truth from her.
As the seconds that past felt like hours almost I had my past self yelling at me like I was a moron 'so tell why you're not getting up off your ass and going to her?!' he/I shouted to me. Like a jolt of energy I stood on fumbling legs and took off after her. The sun had gone down by this point so it was that much more difficult to locate her. Yeah I risked running into people despite the darkness that was around but people liked to go for jogs after work or to take their pets out for walks after work.
I almost knocked into a few more people to as I was in my own head right now but at this point I didn't care. I needed to find her. It only took a few more minutes for me to realize she was once again lost to my vision. The darkness where she slipped into was only light up once more by the street lamps as the park dissipated slowly to give way to traffic and people walking home. I literally ran from one park of the park to the other end and lost her among all of it. I didn't try to push past people on the sidewalk.
She was too short to be seen among them so I knew I wouldn't find her. I stopped to give one final look around and nothing. It was like she was never there to begin with. She disappeared into the masses back on the streets. My little rabbit could flee when she wanted to. I grew frustrated now and growled it out scaring a few passing people as they looked at me like I was a tad crazy.
I tried to compose myself but at this point I didn't care anymore. I had once more lost sight of Usagi, this time it was because I was too busy sitting on my ass feeling sorry for myself and in my inner musings. I pulled out my phone to pulled Minako's information up to call her when I winced at what she might say. I put my phone back away in my pocket. I really didn't feel like getting a verbal beat down for failing to talk to Usagi.
Instead I went home and merely texted Minako…failure at park, she disappeared on me. Will try at her place tomorrow…and put my phone away as I tried to call Usagi once more. No response as I grow more frustrated. I run my hands through my hair as I feel it sticking up in different directions. All of the earlier anger that I tried to put into running comes back at me full force as I want to smash that guy's face in.
AGAIN! Hell I wanted to march up to him and beat him down for kissing her again, even if this time it wasn't on her face. I debate on going over to his house and beating on him but know that it's irrational to do so. I wasn't thinking straight and while I wouldn't get nailed for hitting a minor I would still get arrested if he decided to press charges. Plus I didn't know which house on her block he lived in. it was futile to do but thinking on it did make me feel better, what would really make me feel better though was Usagi in my arms.
If we had been at the resort instead. If this night hadn't turned into an utter night mare. I could have had her in my arms as we cuddled and kissed. I shut my eyes as I could only see now their kiss. I go into my bathroom and try to splash some cold water on my face. A shock if you will as I keep seeing the images flash before my face. I looked up to see my prince self-looking merely disappointed in me.
My anger getting the better of me I punched my mirror. My new mirror to before I hit the door with my hand. The door banged hard against the wall as I walked out. I grabbed a lamp and threw it at the balcony door as they both shattered and broke from the force. I kicked the coffee table. It was only Minako's text that stalled my rage on my place as I read it. Handle it…But I couldn't deal with her right now.
I didn't even bother to wonder what she didn't ask 'how' things went down when earlier she was '20 questioning me' all over when I was in front of Naru. I was to upset at myself to care though and I didn't want to take it out on someone who wasn't the sole reason for my anger. "You'll talk to her tomorrow." I tell myself as I force myself to sit down on the couch. I didn't even want to drink, the thought of it was nice but I wanted to be level headed while in this frame of mind, alcohol wouldn't aid in that.