Akira wonders how Alice and Ryo even put up with each other. "Outside looking in" prompt request from guest/anon reviewer.

Akira Hayama was completely convinced that Alice and Ryo were an incredibly dysfunctional relationship. He often wondered how the two had stayed together this long.

The first time he had an actual experience of their dynamic was the Lunar Festival, and it was no secret to everyone how much of a trainwreck that was. He had never been aware how selfish Alice could be. She was pretty oblivious to his and Ryo's suffering, as if she was as dense as a goddamn rock.

And Ryo, that damned Kurokiba, was an enabler. He grumbled and groaned, but he put up with everything Alice threw his way anyway, like an obedient, trained dog. Akira assumed he was head over heels for Alice, because why else would anyone endure such torture?

That, and he still remembers the glare Ryo gave him when Alice ended up listening to Akira's advice during the festival, when it was Akira who brought her to her senses. Ryo glared at him for a split second, as if he'd suddenly become a threat.

The only other way to describe it was that he looked damn jealous.

Akira didn't care. It's not like he would ever have feelings for someone as insufferable as Alice Nakiri.

"You don't get it. Alice to me is like Jun Shiomi to you. I can't get rid of her that easily, not that I want to. And even if I wanted to, I actually have a formal contract as her aide."

Akira had asked Ryo once why he just couldn't shake off Alice, after his third consecutive day grumbling about how demanding and ridiculous she was on her period, crying for the most absurd of reasons. Ryo looked more deprived of sleep than he usually was, what with Alice whining that she wanted Danish bread now, when it was twelve midnight.

It was after Ryo ranted about that when Akira found out he was actually orphaned like him, and it was Alice's family who took him in. It was Alice's family spending on his living expenses and education, and he was actually on her dad's payroll as her aide.

"No wonder you can't leave her, then," Akira said.

Ryo just shrugged. "There's that. But then there's one other thing."

"Which is…?"

Ryo drank down the hibiscus tea that Jun had prepared for them in one swing, as if it was beer or liquor. He put the teacup down, and then said:

"If it was the other way around, Alice wouldn't leave me, either."

Akira often questioned that statement. Alice often threatened leaving when she was in a tantrum.

It's over! We're through! Don't talk to me ever again! Akira had heard those words and variants of them every time Alice threw a fit, at Ryo or even at Akira himself.

But she never really did leave. Ryo, being Ryo, would just apologize to her and all would be forgotten. But Akira, being Akira, would stand his ground. Alice would eventually send him a text that she'd forgiven him now, and then she would carry on as usual like nothing happened.

Akira only understood what Ryo really meant after he'd been expelled from Totsuki, after betraying everyone for Central.

It was a humiliating way to go--joining Central but being expelled for it, anyway. He'd resigned himself to his fate, and going back to Tokyo the next day to nurse his wounds and figure out where he and Jun could stay.

But Alice kept blowing up his phone with calls, that persistent woman. Akira never answered. The last thing he wanted right now was Alice nagging him and chastising him for his poor life choices.

The caller ID on the phone suddenly changed. It was Ryo calling him how. At least Ryo could be a little more reasonable to talk to, and Akira thought he could at least tell him to tell Alice to stop calling him--

"AKIRA HAYAMA! Why the hell have you been ignoring my calls?!"

Akira groaned. It was Alice on the line, probably just switching to Ryo's phone. "Anyway, don't get on the plane to Tokyo tomorrow, okay?! I chartered a van and a ship so we could all go to see the Regiment and support Yukihira. I've already taken care of everything, so you just need to show up!"

"Alice," Akira began, already sounding done before he'd even started, "I'll have to decline. I'm sure no one wants me there. Everyone's down enough as it is and I…"

I betrayed everyone. Akira couldn't say it.

"Hmph! You idiot!" Akira could almost hear Alice pouting on the other end of the line. "Who cares about what you did? I certainly don't care, and I certainly want you there with us! You're my friend, Akira! The bond between the Lab Coat Trio is absolute!"

Akira was stunned into silence.

"And I'm damn sure Yukihira wants you there as well, okay?" Alice continued. "And Ryo does too, of course. Ryo! Come over here and tell Akira to come with us tomorrow!"

There was a small silence at the other end of the line, and Akira assumed Alice handed the phone over to Ryo. It was his voice on the line that came out next.

"...Go home," Ryo said. "Loser."

"Screw you, Kurokiba," Akira said, but he caught the sound of Ryo chuckling, and Alice nagging at him for being so mean. But Akira knew Ryo was joking. "I heard you lost as well, so that makes two of us."

"Three of us," Ryo corrected. Alice lost along with the both of them. "Just get yourself over here, because Miss isn't going to shut up about it otherwise. See you."

They hung up, and Akira just sat there, thinking back on Alice's words.

I want you there with us! You're my friend, Akira! Our bond is absolute!

He began to understand what Ryo meant, when he asked why he couldn't leave her.

If it were the other way around, she wouldn't leave me, either. Alice is incredibly loyal.

Akira figured out eventually what the keyword was: Loyalty.

Alice whined like a child and threw tantrums when she was at her worst, but Ryo put up with it anyway and waited for it to tide over, never threatening to leave her.

Ryo was far from being a saint; he too was prone to violent bursts when he was mad. But Alice would just jump in, and was often the only voice of reason that could make him simmer down when he was beyond consolation.

At times, things went less smoothly than that. Sometimes they meet the other's fire with fire, and start yelling at each other. Arguing was inevitable, and at many times, Akira found himself in the middle of it. But it never lasted. Almost everyone around them had that feeling of certainty, when Ryo and Alice would argue. They would fight, but they would never be over.

Akira thought he'd figured out why he and everyone felt that way.

Everyone else can feel that Alice and Ryo have already decided not to leave each other.

It was as if they had already made a vow to each other, long ago, that they weren't going to leave the other behind. If they'd actually made some silly promise like that to each other as kids, it wouldn't surprise Akira at all.

And then Akira wondered if relationships didn't care more for whether or not two people are functional, or were a perfect match. Passion for cooking aside, Alice and Ryo had little in common. Even their cooking styles were polar opposites. Alice cooked in a whimsical, almost impractical way, while Ryo cooked straightforwardly. Alice was the epitome of a girly girl; shopping trips and romance flicks and all that. Ryo was by all means stereotypically masculine; working out and fishing and liquor.

But strangely, they meet in the middle. Ryo would look exhausted as all hell, carrying a dozen shopping bags for Alice. Alice would look about ready to fall asleep and complain about how damn early it was, when Ryo took her to the fish markets. But they showed up for each other anyway. Even the best dishes the two had ever made were when they took notes from each other.

It was as if they'd already made a conscious decision to stay together, and compromise.

And maybe that was all that mattered.

Akira walked into the hotel lobby, cursing how old habits of having to water Jun's plants made him used to waking up so early. Today's Regiment de Cuisine match wasn't scheduled until later in the day, and the rest of the rebel group had way too much fun celebrating the landslide win the night prior. Most of them were probably still dead asleep in their rooms.

He spotted Ryo and Alice, though, sitting together on the lobby couch. Alice was snuggled up against Ryo, her head resting on his shoulders, eyes closed. Ryo had his arm around her shoulder, and the other hand on his phone, as if browsing something.

Akira felt as if he was walking into something private, and even thought about walking back into the elevator. But for Alice and Ryo, this was actually fairly expected. Akira had caught them holding hands so many times now.

"Oh. Hayama." Ryo spotted him, and then put a finger up to his lip, as if telling Akira to keep his voice down. With that, Akira deduced Alice was asleep. There were two cups of coffee in front of them. "You can take either of those. Alice fell asleep before she could drink hers."

Akira quietly took the seat in front of them. "Not much of a coffee person, no thanks," he said. That, and he could smell how sweet that coffee was from where he sat. The other one smelled overwhelmingly bitter, completely black. Even their coffee was at polar opposites. Akira mused for a while, trying to figure who was drinking what. "Did she get drunk last night?"

"Nope. Just got way too exhausted cheering, I suppose."

Akira chuckled at that. He remembered the Autumn Elections, when Ryo would be annoyed like hell at anyone cheering from the audience. Even Alice kept her mouth shut then, knowing Ryo would probably bark at her if she started making a fuss from the audience.

And here they all were, cheering on Yukihira and company from the sidelines. They've come a long way.

"You asked her out yet?" Akira casually asked. Ryo only gave him a confused look, and Akira groaned. "Are you two dating, or are we still in denial about that?"

You two share hotel rooms, for God's sake, Akira thought. They may as well keep up with this denial thing until their wedding day.

"...Huh. Who knows," Ryo said, trying to distractedly look at his phone. "...Maybe."

Akira sighed, knowing that was probably as close to a confession as he could get from the two. "Yeah, whatever you say. I've been third-wheeling between the two of you for so long, so you're not fooling me. I'm gonna take that as a yes. "

Ryo actually chuckled, and with that Akira knew that he was dead-on right.