All This Time

by LenaDeMon

Elena was always composed and methodical. She knew how to survive the world way before it finished. She wasn't looking for attachments, for people to call a family. Because attachments are liability, make you weak especially in this new world where dead are walking and living are more dangerous than before.

37. Chapter 37

Day 293

In the past week, we've been working hard. We ventured back inside the prison, to the places that we already secured, to retrieve the bodies. Moving the corpses from inside and courtyard into one place. Today we were going to finally burn them and bring the cars in.

Hershel was in and out of consciousness for the first two days, but today he looked way better. His cheeks gained color, and he was eating full meals again. And he definitely was bored, he was moaning to me about it this morning.

We were out with the first light, bringing the cars into the main gate. The most fun was pushing the tipped bus out of the way, so we could even drive through. I mean, I'm not going to lie. Watching Daryl next to me, clenching his jaw, and tensing those muscles was worth it. Even Carol's smug face, when she caught me checking Dixon out, didn't destroy my mood.

"OK, let's get the other car in," Rick said after Carol brought the pick-up in. "Park them in the west entry of the yard."

"Good. Our vehicles camped out there looked like a giant vacancy sign," Daryl commented, seriously where he gets these anecdotes from?

"After that, we need to load up these corpses so we can burn 'em."

"Make sure we do it where we don't plan to plant anything," I told Rick, walking ahead next to him.

"Where's Glenn and Maggie?" Carol asked. I exchanged glances with Daryl, and we both smirked. We were the first two up this morning, and when we came out for a cigarette, let's say that we heard the young couple, and they were very occupied at that point. "We could use some help."

"Up in the guard tower," Daryl pointed ahead, and Rick furrowed his brows, looking in that direction.

"Guard tower? They were just up there last night."

"Let's be happy they doing it there, not in the cell block," I commented, making Carol laugh, and T-Dog flinched at the thought.

"Glenn!" Daryl stepped forward and shouted. Oh, boy. What the hell are you doing, Dixon? "Maggie!"

We watched from the distance as someone jumped to their feet inside the tower and opened the door to the dock. Glenn came out, without a shirt, buttoning his pants. Well, at least someone is having fun in this group.

"Hey! What's up, guys?" The Asian man called over, his hair was a complete mess, and I could see Maggie behind him, trying to see what we want. We all giggled lightly, and the hunter put hands on his hips. Daryl glanced at me, his eyes flickered mischievously.

"Ya comin'?" Oh. My. God. I nearly choked, trying not to laugh, biting down on my bottom lip. Beside me, Carol and T didn't try to hide their amusement.

"What?" Glenn answered, his voice cracked a little.

"Ya comin'?" Daryl repeated, chuckling to himself. Even from here, I could see Glenn glancing over at his girlfriend, not knowing how to answer that kind of question. "Come on. We could use a hand."

"Yeah, we- we'll be right down."

We walked back to the cars, Carol smacking Daryl's shoulder playfully, while I bumped him with my shoulder.

"Daryl Dixon got fucking jokes, who would've thought," I teased him, making him smirk at me.

"Ya know I do, princess."

"Huh. So, do you wanna take a watch with me tonight?" I asked him, wiggling my eyebrows. Carol and T started laughing again, and Daryl pushed me gently and rolled his eyes.

"Shut up, woman." I was about to go and get the Hyundai when T-Dog spoke slowly, getting our attention.

"Hey, Rick." I turned around two see two remaining prisoners, coming in our direction, from their cell block. Sheriff's expression changed momentarily, his lips scowling, and eyes getting cold.

"Come with me," Rick ordered sternly and walked forward, to meet the men halfway, to stop them from getting any closer.

"That's close enough!" The sheriff told the prisoners, clenching his fists. "We had an agreement."

"Please, mister," Axel started, shifting on his legs, and his arms were crossed on his chest. "We know that. We made a deal. But you gotta understand, we can't live in that place another minute."

While he was talking, Glenn and Maggie came down from the tower, now standing behind the two men.

"You follow me?" Axel continued. I was wondering how long he was rehearsing that speech. "All the bodies. People we knew. Blood, brains everywhere. There's ghosts."

"Well, then you move the bodies out," Daryl told them, his voice tense.

"You should be burning them," T-Dog added, and inmates exchanged glances before Axel spoke again.

"We tried. We did."

"The fence is down, the far side of the prison," Oscar continued explaining. "Every time we drag a body out, those things just line up. So, dropping the body, and just running back inside."

"Look, we had nothing to do with Tomas and Andrew. Nothin'." Axel stepped closer, his body language open, no signs of a lie. "You trying to prove a point, you proved it, bro. We'll do whatever it takes to be part of your group. Just please, please, don't make us live in that place."

Rick glared at the two men in front of him and cocked his head. "Our deal is non-negotiable. You either live in your cell block, or you leave."

I sighed internally. I knew where all that mistrust came from. We did meet hostile groups before. Hell, I was the one that dealt with all of them. But I could tell that situation here was different. They are only two people; there aren't any others who could come and attack us from nowhere. And from what I could tell so far, they were telling the truth, and really weren't kind of people Tomas was.

"I told you this was a waste of time," Oscar stated, looking over at Axel with a grim expression on his face. "They ain't no different than the pricks who shot up our boys. You know how many friend's corpses we had to drag out this week?"

Oscar's voice was getting stronger and more bitter with every word. And I could tell by looking at Glenn, Maggie, and T-Dog that it was starting to get to them. But he wasn't finished yet.

"Just threw 'em out, like- these were good guys. Good guys who had our backs against the really bad dudes in the joint, like Tomas and Andrew. Now, we've all made mistakes to get in here, chief. And I'm not gonna pretend to be a saint, but believe me, we've paid our due. Enough that we would rather hit that road than to go back into that shit hole."

There was a dreading silence after his speech, the words I recognized as truth. After a moment, Rick slowly glanced above his shoulder, locking his eyes with Daryl's. And right there, when I observed both men's faces, I knew that desition was made. Dixon bit his bottom lip, and slowly shook his head for 'no'.

So when Rick looked at me, I forced a smile on my lips and nodded. I believed the prisoners and that they had nothing to do with Tomas. But it was two to one, and although Rick acknowledged my opinion, it wasn't enough to convince him.

"Are you serious? You want them living in a cell next to you?" Rick was looking at T-Dog and me, his hand propped on the tilted bus. Daryl just came back from locking the prisoners away, on their side of the prison. "They'll just be waiting for a chance to grab our weapons. You want- you want to go back to sleeping with one eye open?"

"I never stopped," T-Dog replied in a feeble tone. "Bring them into the fold. Now, we send 'em off packing, we might as well execute them ourselves."

"I don't know. Axel seems a little unstable," Glenn said, not looking convinced.

"Because he's scared," I replied, trying to let them see my point of view.

"After all we've been through? We fought so hard for all this." Carol stated, making me sigh heavily. "What if they decide to take it?"

"It's just been us for so long. They're strangers," Maggie spoke in a hushed voice, as so the men in question won't hear. "It feels weird, all of a sudden having other people around."

"You brought us in," T told her, biting his bottom lip.

"Yeah, but you turned up with a shot boy in your arms. You didn't give us a choice."

"They can't even kill walkers," Glenn added, but I shook my head.

"So, we teach them."

"They convicts, bottom line," Carol said, and that made me twist to look at her with furrowed eyebrows.

"I killed eleven people since the turn. And more before all of this happened," I growled in a low voice. "Are you going to shut me on the other side of that gate, too?"

Carol flinched at that and averted her eyes. "That's different."

"I get guys like this," Daryl spoke before I could argue more with the gray-haired woman. I pressed my lips in the thin line and moved my eyes to Daryl, waiting for what he got to say. "Hell, I grew up with 'em. They degenerate, but they ain't psychos. I could have been in there with 'em just as easy as I'm out here with ya guys."

"So, you're with us?" T-Dog asked the hunter gesturing between himself and me.

"Hell no." My heart dropped at Daryl's answer, and I clenched my fists, looking away from him. "Let 'em take their chances out on the road, just like we did."

I groaned in frustration and raised my voice a little. "Look, I know you're all scared. Guess what, so am I. I am the one who had the closest calls over the winter. But also I know when people lie. And they don't. This all is fucking new to them, and they're scared. I saw guys like them, they aren't killers. We- I have more blood on my hands than they do, for sure."

"When I was a rookie, I arrested this kid- nineteen years old," Rick interrupted me before I could continue. "Wanted for stabbing his girlfriend. Kid blubbered like a baby during the interrogation, during the trial. Suckered the jury. He was acquitted due to insufficient evidence, and then two weeks later, shot another girl. We've been through too much. Our deal with them stands," Rick finished and started to walk away.

I pushed past Daryl, who tried to stop me, but I shoved his arm off me, sending him a cold glare.

"Rick. All I'm asking is, let me talk to them," I said, running a hand over my sweaty face.

"Elena-"

"I told my piece of mind, and so did you. I get it. With the kid, How did you know he did it?"

"Evidence, digging through his past, witnesses said he was arguing with the girl for weeks prior. And then-" Rick paused for a second, tilting his head. "There was that one look he sent me."

"That was your instinct. You know me for eight months now. You trusted my opinions before. You know I can tell when someone's lying. Rick, I'd do everything for this group. Hell, I already did so much, I killed people for you, guys." I explained to the sheriff in a hushed voice.

"I know. And you know I'd do this same if it was me," He growled and pointed the finger at my face.

"Rick, it's not an argument! Since that night, after the farm, I told you that I trust you. That I'll follow you, but that you need to lean on someone in whatever means you need. I know better than any of you how horrible people, especially men, can be. But when I look at Axel and Oscar, I don't see it. Not once did they glanced at our weapons, not once they looked over at Maggie, Carol, or me like we're a piece of meat. We had a bad track with new people. And I'll always be wary and on edge when we'll meet more, but them?" I shook my head and laughed dryly. "We don't know them, but they're harmless. So let me talk to them, see what they got to say. Carol's worried that they're convicts, let me find out why they're here in the first place. Let me talk to them, please, Rick."

I took a deep breath, waiting for the sheriff to answer me. He tilted his head and clenched his jaw, but after a second of hesitation, he nodded.

"Have your gun and knives with you. We gonna go get the wood. In the meantime, we'll lock them by the gate. You can use that time to talk with them."

I walked slightly behind the rest towards the gate, separating two courtyards. We were bringing our cars closer to our block, so we can have quick access in case of emergency. But I was here to get the prisoners and start our chat.

I brushed past Dixon, trying to ignore him, but he grabbed my upper arm and leaned down, his raspy voice just a whisper in my ear.

"Ya mad?"

I moved my face to look into his blue eyes, and I sighed. Our noses were nearly brushing. He was chewing his lip again, and I glanced at it for second before looking back up.

"No, I don't expect us to agree on everything, Daryl."

"I just don't want 'em to hurt anyone," He said softly, his thumb running small circles on my dirty arm. I put a little smile on my face.

"I know. Me too, but we can't kill or get rid of every living people we encounter. Not all of them are bad."

"Just be careful."

"Alway am, Big Boy. Don't worry about me, take your baby inside, I'll wait here with them," I motioned at two men who were watching us, and Daryl nodded sharply. He dropped his hand and stepped back towards his bike. I smirked under my nose, he was adorable when embarrassed.

I walked towards the gate and waited for the others to drive through it, so I can stay with prisoners alone. I watched Axel looking over at Daryl's bike, the men's arms were crossed, and he was shifting from one leg to the other.

"Twin cylinders, that's Triumph?"

Daryl glared at the inmate while he sat down on his bike and turned on the engine. "Don't even look at it."

"Didn't want to bore it out? Sounds like it could use a tune-up." Axel kept talking, but Dixon was ignoring him, though I saw his jaw clenching, muscles on his neck tightening. "I'm pretty handy with a wrench. Heads are leakin'. I know my bikes!"

Daryl drove away, and Glenn shut the gate behind them, sending my worried glance. I smiled at him reassuringly and turned around to look at the two men.

"Man, will you just stop?" Oscar asked his friend, leaning on the office doors, shaking his head. I gained their attention when I snickered and moved closer to them.

Axel's eyes went wide, and Oscar looked at me, distrustfully.

"You here to kill us, Ma'am?" Axel asked me, swallowing harshly. I snorted and rose my eyebrows at him.

"No. You wanted to talk. We have questions. And I have a gift of separating truth from lies. But you try anything, at all, and yes, I'll kill you." I told him, glancing between both of them.

"We already told you, we-" I rose my hand to stop him from talking, and he shut his mouth.

"Let's go inside, it's fucking hot today. I hate Georgia." I muttered last words, and opened the guard's office door, walking in and glancing around. There were blood splatters on the floor and the walls, we already disposed of the body that was in here. Metal desk with four chairs and some drawers. Old, dusty computer, and some control station, probably to catalog all arrivals and departures. And then the stairs leading to the higher level of the watchtower.

"Sit down," I ordered them, walking around the desk. I put my legs on it after sitting down, and I stared at the men, who looked at each other for a moment before they took their seats in front of me. "Great. I ask questions, you answer truthfully. We don't have that much time, they do want to send you away."

"You don't?" Oscar interrupted me, disbelief evident on his face.

"Look, I stick up my neck for you guys, here. I believed when you said you had nothing to do with Tomas. But the rest? We were out since the beginning. And we learned that walkers aren't the only enemies. You've seen movies like that before, didn't you? The world goes to shit, and humans think that laws don't apply anymore, that they can do whatever they want to anyone. Primal law. The man above the woman."

"We understand, Ma'am."

"OK, first, I'm Elena. Don't call me Ma'am I feel fucking old, when you're doing that, Axel." I told the blonde guy, and he relaxed a little bit, but his companion was still tense, distrustful. Right, that's smart, keeps you alive for longer.

"Alrighty, you first Axel. What did you do before you get to jail?" I asked him, and he started talking immediately. He liked to chat, that's for sure.

"I was a mechanic. Um, part-time. That's what got me here."

"OK, what got you here?"

"Armed robbery, but it wasn't like that." He sighed heavily and shook his head. "I had a shit month, my brother borrowed some money, and I owed some to- well, dealers. And there wasn't a lot of jobs going on. I got into the store with a water pistol, grabbed some food and money from the register." I looked at him, making sure to keep my blank face on, but inside I was laughing like a maniac. Water fucking pistol? Is he for real? I nodded, letting him know to continue.

"I hid in my brother's place, but cops found me the next day. They found his gun, and wouldn't believe that anyone would be so stupid to rob a store with a water gun. I got ten years, still had two to go, when the riot started." He finished, and I hummed after listening to him.

"Did you ever even fired a real gun?"

"No, Ma- Elena."

I observed his body language and face. He was visibly ashamed of what he did eight years ago, and he seemed honest, answering my questions. I moved my eyes to the other man, who sat guarded on the chair, but we were interrupted by voices outside.

"El! Move yur ass." I rolled my eyes at Daryl's words and moved to the door.

"Don't talk about my ass, or I'll think you're interested," I answered when I stepped back into the sun, sending Dixon a smirk. He huffed and walked through the gate.

"Dixon," I called after him, making him turn around. "Be careful out there."

"Always am, woman."

"You sure you're alright with them?" Rick asked me, glancing towards the office.

"Yeah, we're fine, don't worry. I spoke to Axel, I just got Oscar left."

"And?"

"And I think we really should let them stay. They know the layout of the prison more than we do. They've worked here. Axel's a mechanic, that could be handy." I whispered I didn't want to raise any hopes in the inmates, in case Rick wouldn't agree. The sheriff looked grim but nodded before answering.

"I'm gonna think about it. We gonna take the keys."

"Alrighty, get going. I'll see you in a bit," I told him and walked back inside, sitting straight in the chair.

"Sorry about that, boys. So, Oscar," I glanced at the black man, and he looked me directly in the eyes, his face like stone. "What you've been doing before getting arrested?"

"I worked constructions, mainly electric." He said simply, not giving away to much.

"Axel mentioned before that you did B and E. Why? Construction isn't that badly paid."

"It was stupid, that's what it was," He grunted, looking away for a second. "I had one friend, for most of my life, we got in with a bad crowd when we were kids. I got out, but he stayed with them. And one day, he calls me and says that he needs help with something. He told me he needed an electrician to sort something out. So step one was to cut the power off, to check the installation."

"Except it wasn't to do a check, was it?" I asked him softly, seeing how he stopped talking for a moment.

"No. By the time I realized, we were inside, and he was pointing a gun at an old couple, while his crew grabbed what they could. The police came before we could go anywhere. I got three years."

I nodded and sighed, looking at him with pity. "For property damage and entering without permission, and because the others had guns, right?"

Oscar looked at me carefully and nodded. "Yeah. Who were you before?"

"FBI," I smirked when Axel gasped, but Oscar just hummed, like my answer explained everything. "How much longer you had?"

"I should've been released six months ago."

"OK, what about Tomas and Andrew?"

"We didn't know them that much. They were bullies." Axel quickly answered. "Tomas robbed a bank with his gang and shot the cop while escaping."

"He ruled the C block. Aggressive, you saw what he did to Big Tiny, Elena," Oscar added, and I was ready to answer when I heard shots.

At that sound, I sprung back to my feet, and my heart leaped into my throat. It was hard to accurately pinpoint where it came from, but no one would use their guns like that without reason. Especially that by the time I got outside, it was more than one bullet being fired.

"What's that?" Axel asked behind me, but I ignored him and jogged towards the gate leading to the inner courtyard. Fuck, I forgot that Rick locked it.

"No!" I yelled and yanked at the gate, trying to force it open. In far, I could hear screams and shots, and I could see people and walkers alike in the small yard outside of our cellblock. We were fucking cut off. I was way too far to even attempt to fire my gun, and this guard tower didn't have any rifle in, and my lockpicking set was safe in my cell. I gritted my teeth and shook the gate one more time.

"Lori!" I could hear somewhere behind me, and when I glanced above my shoulder, I could see Rick, Daryl, and Glenn sprinting through the catwalk. "Keys, Keys!"

I watched with cold, trembling hands when Glenn threw the keys forward to Daryl, and hunter past them to Rick. I stood in a clear line of view, spreading my legs a little. The second gate was unlocked, I yelled at the sheriff, urging him to hurry up.

"Rick!" He threw me the keys, and I spun around, grabbed the right one, and put it into the lock, twisting and pushing metal aside. The men ran past me, Daryl pulling at my shirt to get me moving as well.

"What about us?" Axel shouted after us, and I turn around, still pushing forward.

"Stay behind me!" I took out my Glock and moved to the side, so I wouldn't hit my guys. By the time we got to the inner yard, my heart was racing, Hershel and Beth only people I could see. I fired at one of the remaining walkers, trying to get to the cage where Greenes where hiding.

"What the hell happened?" Rick asked, sticking his machete in the walker's head.

"The gate was open!" Beth told us, visibly distressed.

"Where's Lori? Carl? Everyone else?"

"Maggie let Lori and Carl into C block," Hershel replied, pointing the doors they took. I kicked at the geek that came closer to me and took out my machete. Putting my frustration and fear into the blow, I sliced his face and head in half, watching it slowly slip down to the ground.

"And T bit," My breath hitched in my throat when I heard what Beth said. My lips trembled. I took a sharp breath and tightened my grip on a blade, burying the pain deep inside me. There will be time for grieving later.

"Anyone else?" Rick keeps asking questions, while I ran at the last walker I could see. I took it's head off, stabbing it once it fell to the ground with an angry scream. T- they had to be wrong, maybe they didn't see everything properly. Surely he couldn't be bitten.

"I couldn't tell."

"Stay put."

Glenn checked the other gate and jogged back to us. "Those chains didn't break on their own. Someone took an ax or cutters to 'em."

Rick's face was a perfect example of fury. His mouth twitched and turned upside down, muscles in his jaw were tight, his nose flaring when he looked back at the prisoners who just made their way through the gate.

"You think they did it?"

"Who else?"

"No! Rick!" I yelled after him when he started marching towards Axel and Oscar. "I was with them all that time."

"Who else then?" Sheriff spun around, directing his anger at me.

'"How the fuck would I know? Are you sure Andrew is dead?"

Before we could go and ask two men about it, alarms started echoing through the courtyard. The speaker blasting, laud, high sound.

"Who's that?"

"Aw- you gotta be kiddin' me."

I looked around, the sound already attracting walkers from outside towards the prison. I took out my Glock and shot at the nearest speaker, hoping to control the damage a bit. Rick and Glenn were quickly repeating my actions.

"How the hell can this be happening?" Rick asked the prisoners, who were glancing around uneasily. He pointed his Colt at them, making Oscar raise his arms and step back a bit.

"Whoa, whoa. Hey, it has to be the backup generators."

"Well, how to turn those on?"

"Look, there's- there's three that's connected to a diesel tank, OK? Each one controls a certain part of the prison. You had to shut 'em all off when the prison was overrun."

"Could someone open up the main gates electronically with full power?"

"Look, I- I only worked in there a few days. I- I guess it might be possible."

"All right, come with us." Rick didn't even wait for a reply, just started running into the prison.

When we got to our cell block, there were dozen of walkers inside; someone had to open the other side and lure them in here. And I was a hundred percent sure that it wasn't Axel or Oscar, I would notice something off when I spoke with them. We killed the geeks quickly and checked the cells for Lori, Maggie, and Carl, but they weren't there.

At the moment, our priority was to get to the generator room as fast as possible and shut this shit down before we'll get overrun.

We came around the corner, finally finding the room and Rick slammed his shoulder, opening a squicky, metal door. Daryl shut it as soon as I was inside. He and Oscar slammed their bodies against the door, which didn't want to close. Oh, I didn't mention? There were like twenty walkers outside, chasing us before we got here. And now they were banging and scraping at the piece of metal that was separating us from their deadly bites. I was out of bullets, only my knives and machete left as protection.

"How do you shut those down?" Rick yelled over the noise from inside the room, and Oscar glanced between Daryl and me.

"Go!" I told him and took his place against the door. It was bouncing, digging deep in my back, every time a body on the other side pushed. We had to shut it correctly before they all barge in. I looked at the hunter next to me, his sweaty form was pushing hard, arms bulging and his neck vein prominent. I glanced down at where he chucked his crossbow and back to him. I can't hold the door by myself, though.

"Hold it," I told him and stepped forward, lifting the bow I huffed a little at how heavy it actually was. Daryl always made it look so easy to carry, but that's bullshit. Dixon looked at me, and what I was doing, he fired the bolt at one of the geeks just before we came in, so I had to fucking reload.

I watched him enough times to do it, right? And even without my weekly exercises, I was still stronger than an average woman of my size. Breathing steady, I snatched the bolt from the holder and leaned the bow on the floor, the stock resting on my thigh. I lodged my right foot in the stirrup to hold it in spot and placed the bolt. OK, now for the hard part.

I heard the noises somewhere behind me, shouting and maybe a fight. But if we don't shut this fucking door, it won't matter. We'll all fucking die. My heart was racing in my chest with a new rush of adrenaline, and I bent down. Grabbing the string with both hands and holding the bolt at this same time, I pulled. Clenching my teeth, I let a strained gasp escape my lips, and it was done.

"Open!" I shouted, raising the weapon high, with both hands, and the second Daryl stepped away from the door, a walker came in. Glancing through the scope, I pressed the trigger, hearing familiar snap when the bolt was released. The recoil was greater than I anticipated, and I had to take a few steps back when the stock hit me in the face, slipping from my shoulder. I cried out in pain, tears instantly spilling from my eyes.

"Ya OK?" I heard after a second, and I opened my eyes to see that Daryl managed to close the door. He took his bow from my grasp and was looking worryingly at my face.

"Yeah, check what's happening!" The second I said it, we heard a gunshot behind us. I reached for my Glock and followed Dixon deeper inside the room.

Oscar stood there, pointing a Rick's Phyton at sheriff himself. When I stepped to the left, I noticed a body behind Rick, Andrew, the prick that apparently somehow escaped and tried to kill us all. So that's what all the noises were.

"Oscar," I spoke in a soft voice, lowering my gun and gesturing for Rick to stay put. The Black man didn't even look in my direction, in skillful motion he spun the weapon around, so the butt was facing Rick. I breathed out and touched Daryl's shoulder, making him put down his gun while the sheriff took back his Colt.

"There's about ten of 'em outside," Daryl grunted, motioning at the door when Rick finally shut down the generator.

"Well, let's do it now then. While I can still fucking see." I said, sternly grabbing two throwing knives from the reins on my ribs. I spread my legs and took the stance, ready to attack.

"What happened to you?" Rick's gruff voice asked me when he readied his machete next to me.

"She shot my crossbow. Didn't count the recoil." Daryl snorted from the door, while Oscar stood behind us, holding an ax. The same that Andrew used to let walkers in.

"Yeah, and you'll never let me forget that," I commented dryly, smacking my lips and nodding for him to open the door.

We walked back through the corridors, looking for the rest of our people when we heard the steps on our right. We stood still against the wall, ready to attack. My knife in one hand, machete in the other I was tense and scared. Scared of what we going to find.

I rose my blade, but the face that emerged from the corner was familiar and alive. Glenn and Axel came into our view, making us all sigh in relief. But they were alone, and Glenn's grim expression told me that they didn't find anyone else.

We started to move again, forward. Down the corridor that will take us back to our cell block, and that's when I saw it. At the end, by the wall were two walkers feasting on a fresh body. A body in dark pants and cream, long-sleeve t-shirt. A sob escaped my lips before I could stop it, catching the geek's attention.

Rick didn't even hesitate and fired twice, putting both walkers down, and I ran to T-Dog. I tilted my head and sniffed at the sight. His chest was ripped open, completely covered in blood. The majority of his insides were missing. Even his face- the only reason I knew it's him was his clothes and dark skin color; not that there was a lot of skin left. I felt my stomach clench, and I turned to the side, away from the rest, retching. My body trembled while I emptied my stomach to the ground.

"Shh," Warm hand on my back, made me flinch for a second until I realized it's just Daryl. He waited patiently until I was finished and didn't say a word when I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand.

I turned back to my friend's body and took a deep breath. I saw that Rick was pacing in front of T, he couldn't bring himself to do this. And I saw Daryl pick up a familiar scarf from the floor, clenching his fist on the soft fabric. I licked my dry lips and rose my knife.

"El,-"

"I have to," I said in a raspy voice, ignoring the others. "Rest in peace, my friend," I whispered and gently pushed the blade into T-Dog's ear. More tears slip down my cheeks, and I closed my eyes. Rest, I hope you will find Jacqui and Amy and Dale. Watch over us, my friend. There was a cry, full of pain echoing in the corridor and it took me a second to realize it was me. My head low, and eyes closed, I took a few shaky breaths to calm down, focus.

Lori, Maggie, and Carl. That's who we needed to find, and Carol.

I stood up, placing a blank expression on my face, looking sternly at Rick. "We need to find the rest."

I pushed at the door and jogged out, towards Hershel and Beth, noticing that no one else came back.

"You didn't find them?" The old man asked, worry on his face evident.

"Thought maybe they came back out here," Glenn told him, panting heavily. I groaned when both Greene shook their head, Beth looked like she's about to cry.

"What about T?"

"Gone," I whispered, keeping my face still even though my heart was bleeding.

"Carol?"

"Found a scarf," Daryl's hoarse voice sounded from behind me, and that calmed me down. His presence always did that to me, and now I needed it even more.

"That doesn't mean the others didn't," Rick argued, running a hand over his face. "We're going back. Daryl and Glenn, you go with-"

My heart sped up again when I heard cries from behind me, soft, high screechy cries. I swallowed harshly and slowly turned around, scared of what we're going to see.

Maggie came down, out of the cage leading to another cell block entrance. In her arms, she was holding very naked, covered in blood, baby. It was wrapped in Carl's shirt. The boy himself walked behind a young woman, his face pale, but expressionless, holding a gun. Both of their hands were covered in red, fresh blood.

I took a deep, silent breath because I didn't have to be a profiler to know what happened. Maggie's face was red and puffy, Carl was holding a gun and looking at the ground.

Lori was gone.

Rick's ax cluttered to the ground when he slowly walked towards his children and Maggie. I can't even describe how he looked like - grief, anger, disbelief. All those emotions and more mixed on his face while he glanced between Mags and his son. The hand holding his Colt was trembling, something I never saw, not since he tried to put down Dale.

I looked to the side, at Daryl, and closed my eyes for a second, pushing tears back. Three. Suddenly three of us are gone, and it was all my fault. If only I wouldn't be so stubborn. If I would stay here, to protect them, none of this would have happened. I opened my eyes and reached out my hand, searching for my anchor. Slowly interlocking my fingers with Daryl's, I watched our leader brake down.

T-Dog was gone.

Carol was gone.

Lori was gone, but her baby was alive.