Frostmask headed back towards camp with Lizardpaw walking at her shoulder. Her jaw was clenched in silent frustration towards Pineshade and Dampfang, but the edge of her bad mood was softened by the fact that it had finally stopped snowing. Although, the forest around the two cats was still coated in a substantial layer of it.
You okay? Lizardpaw asked her, for the second time today.
Frostmask sighed, and she paused walking.
Dampfang's a jerk. Frostmask signed. I don't like him. And, I wish he didn't spend so much time with Pineshade because it'd be a lot easier for me to ignore him then...
Lizardpaw nodded, his brow furrowed. Frostmask gave her head a sharp shake to try to pull herself from her brooding. Although it was nice to feel like Lizardpaw was on her side, he was still her apprentice, not her peer. Her job was to mentor and train him. It felt a bit improper to wrap him up in her drama with Pineshade and Dampfang. She nudged Lizardpaw's shoulder with her muzzle, deciding to change the subject.
You were amazing back there. She signed. No other cat in ShadowClan could track Cedarpaw down like you did. You saved his life! I'm really proud of you.
Lizardpaw ducked his head shyly, but his blue eyes were bright with pleasure. Frostmask purred, feeling a warm glow of affection in her chest.
I'll make sure Sedgestar knows about what you did today. She continued.
They started walking again and soon reached the thorn barrier. Pushing through the tunnel, Frostmask was greeted by the reassuringly familiar sight of the ShadowClan camp at sun-high. Some cats had crept out of their dens now that the snowfall had stopped, and they were either eating or quietly working in camp. Frostmask noticed Featherpaw and Yewpaw were busy shoving snow away from the holly bush to clear the entrance to the apprentices' den. Larkfoot and Amberberry were by the elders' den, a massive stump of a long-gone pine tree, and they were weaving branches between gaps in the roots and shoving in moss plastered with mud to seal the chill and the snow out of the den. Greytail stuck her head out of the den's entrance, blinking at the she-cats gratefully.
"There's still a draft coming in from the back," the elder rasped.
Larkfoot nodded and snatched up another muddy moss patch, padding around the stump.
Frostmask glanced towards the nursery, feeling a flash of surprise that the queens were reinforcing the elders' den rather than the bramble bush, but she blinked when she realized that now that Cricketpaw, Cedarpaw, Buzzardpaw, and Hollowpaw were apprentices, for the first time in Frostmask's life, there were no kits in ShadowClan.
Frostmask's tail-tip twitched uneasily at the thought. As far as she knew, no she-cat was expecting right now either... Maybe it was for the best. Leaf-bare had only just begun, and fresh-kill was already getting harder and harder to find. It wasn't a good time to be having kits.
As if to emphasize Frostmask's gloomy sentiment, Dawntail started coughing as she was eating a black-bird with Dustleap a few tail-lengths away from the entrance to the medicine cats' den. Elmclaw emerged, drawn out by the sound. He padded over to her, but Dawntail just waved him away with her tail.
"I only swallowed a feather," she meowed around her coughs.
Elmclaw relented and padded back into his cave, but Frostmask's felt worry swirling in her belly. Hopefully it was just a feather, and Dawntail wasn't getting sick like her kits.
Frostmask turned to Lizardpaw, giving him a nod to dismiss him from duties for the sun-high. He padded off towards his siblings, his tail perking up high in greeting to them. Frostmask took a few steps in the direction of Sedgestar's den, but she paused for a moment to watch Lizardpaw, Featherpaw, and Yewpaw together. Featherpaw's and Yewpaw's diligent clearing of the apprentices' den's entrance had turned from work to play when their brother joined them, and now the three of them were pouncing on little mounds of snow and throwing the powder up into the air with their paws.
Today's the first day they've ever seen snow. Frostmask realized with a blink.
It was a bit of a strange thought. The snow and the cold seemed to be something so ingrained into Frostmask's life and her memories, it was odd to imagine that for some cats, today was their first experience with it. Sometimes Frostmask felt like winter, for all its cruelty and death, was what had given her her life. To take it away from her, would be like changing her pelt color or turning her plumy tail into a stub.
Frostmask gave her head a small, melancholy shake. Things really would've been so different for her if today was the first time she'd seen snow. If leaf-bare had not killed them, she'd still have a mother and two siblings. Would she even still be named Frost if the world hadn't been frozen solid the day she was born? She'd have a whole different identity.
I wouldn't be in ShadowClan. May only sought shelter here because leaf-bare was starving us.
Frostmask felt herself tense.
…Would she make that trade if she could? Get her mother back and her brothers, the four of them living together as loners, in trade for all the cats she'd come to know here and all the hardships she'd faced in ShadowClan? When she was a kit, she knew what her answer would be, quite easily, but now it was much more difficult question.
Frostmask glanced around the clearing for a moment before her gaze settled back down on Lizardpaw and his siblings. Watching them tumbling around together made the tightness her heart ease.
I couldn't.
Frostmask relaxed as the thought rang certainly in her mind. Although she'd experienced many terrible things here, losing her mother, growing up as an outcast, losing Swoopstrike… she didn't want to leave ShadowClan. She had just as many, if not more good things here too. She wanted the cats she lost back, but she wasn't going to give up all of things that she had now for them.
Frostmask felt a pang at that thought.
I'm sorry, she thought, whispering the words to the ghosts in her mind.
She gave her ears a small shake to clear her head.
There's no sense in thinking that way anyway. They aren't coming back… I don't have to feel guilty that I wouldn't trade everything else here for them.
Frostmask heard Grovepelt's words echoing in her ears again.
"They wouldn't want you to live the rest of your life in misery."
I'm trying not to, she thought back to herself.
Frostmask gave a soft sigh as she realized that she had completely failed to have any meaningful conversation with Pineshade during her patrol. She would have to deal with her later. Frostmask blinked and pulled herself back to the present moment. She watched Lizardpaw rolling around in the snow for a heartbeat longer, a soft purr in her throat before she turned and padded towards the entrance to Sedgestar's den at the base of the Oak Tree. She could pick up his scent wafting strongly out the roots.
"Sedgestar?" she called. "Can I speak with you?"
"Frostmask?" Sedgestar's voice, rough with sleep replied. "Come in."
Frostmask padded into the earthen tunnel, murmuring a pleased sigh that it was much warmer inside than out in the snow. Once she entered into the dimly lit den, she saw both Sedgestar and Emberflower in their nest. Sedgestar was sitting up, looking at her expectantly, but Emberflower was still curled into a ball by his side. Frostmask's tail flipped guiltily. She'd clearly interrupted their sun-high nap.
Frostmask dipped her head to them briefly. The events of her hectic patrol played out in her mind again, and she felt a moment of nervousness about what Sedgestar's reaction to it would be. But, she gave her head a small shake, making a snap decision to just get it over with and tell her leader everything.
"Some things happened while I was out on patrol that I thought you should know about," Frostmask said, speaking quickly. "When I was with Dampfang, Pineshade and our apprentices, Dampfang and I had a hunting competition with Lizardpaw and Cedarpaw. Dampfang sent Cedarpaw out alone, and he ended up in the Carrionplace. Thanks to Lizardpaw, we were able to track his scent, and rescue him from a group of rats which had trapped him in the Carrionplace. Although Cedarpaw sustained some relatively minor injuries, which he will need to see the medicine cats for. Lizardpaw is back in camp now, and the rest of them were just behind me, so they should be back soon as well."
Sedgestar nodded slowly as he absorbed everything she told him. Emberflower had raised her head from their nest, her gaze troubled. Sedgestar gave a sharp sigh when Frostmask finished her report.
"Agitating the rats is never a good idea," he said, looking weary. "We rely on the fragile truce which keeps them within the bounds of the Carrionplace, as long as we stay out. There will be trouble for ShadowClan if they've been provoked to travel outside of their boundaries… Why exactly did Cedarpaw end up in there again?"
Frostmask shook her head.
"I'm not completely sure. But, I don't think he really knew any better," she meowed. "...I don't think he fully understood that hunting in the Carrionplace was forbidden."
Sedgestar's tail-tip twitched slightly.
"I see," he said, his eyes unreadable. "Thank you for the report, Frostmask. You are dismissed, but please send Dampfang in once he gets to camp."
"I will," she murmured, but she didn't move to leave yet. "I also wanted to be sure that you knew how well Lizardpaw did today, though. Without his tracking abilities, I'm certain we wouldn't've been able to get to Cedarpaw in time."
Sedgestar nodded again and some of his stern expression softened.
"Very good," he meowed. "I'm sure that will help reassure some of our clan-mates that question his usefulness."
Frostmask's tail raised in pride for her apprentice. She dipped her head to Sedgestar again before turning and padding back out of the den. When Frostmask emerged, shivering at the cold that rushed back over her, she saw that the others still hadn't made it back to camp yet.
Frostmask wandered over into the center of the clearing, hesitating as she glanced around. She wasn't sure what to do with herself while she waited for Dampfang, Pineshade and their apprentices to get back. It felt too cold to linger outside, just standing around. But, she wasn't sure that she wanted to go in the warriors' den either.
Her tail twitched uneasily.
What if Autumnleap is in there?
Frostmask sighed softly, wishing she could go back to a few moons ago, when she had plenty of cats to seek out to spend time with, instead of worrying about running into them.
"Hey, Frostmask." A voice interrupted her, and she turned to see Poolcloud padding over to her.
Frostmask raised her tail in greeting, feeling a rush of happiness at the sight of him. He was one of the few uncomplicated, friendly faces she had left.
"Hey, what's up?" she meowed.
Poolcloud shrugged in his good-natured way.
"Nothing much," he meowed. "I wanted to come see how you're doing."
"Me?" Frostmask said, angling an ear at him questioningly.
Poolcloud scuffled his paws in the snow for a moment.
"Yeah," he said. "I mean, I know you and Pineshade aren't on great terms since Pineshade and... you know."
Poolcloud cleared his throat awkwardly like he didn't want to say Dampfang's name out loud, as if he was worry about upsetting her.
"Yeah," Frostmask admitted. "I was trying to make up with her today, but it didn't go exactly great... our patrol was kinda a disaster in fact."
Poolcloud pricked his ears in an expression of interest. Frostmask sighed.
"Dampfang showed up," she explained. "Cedarpaw got lost and ended up in the Carrionplace. He was injured by rats... Everyone is okay, but it was this whole thing."
Frostmask lashed her tail a few times in emphasis.
"...Well you know that Pineshade can be difficult," Poolcloud said. "But, I'm glad that you're making up."
"Trying to," Frostmask corrected with a bitter purr. "And, failing right now, but I'll attempt again later."
Poolcloud nodded before falling quiet for a moment, and he looked down at his paws.
"Anyway, I'm also worried about Autumnleap," he said, his tail twitching faintly, and Frostmask's stomach lurched at the sound of his name. "He's been not himself for the past few days, and I've seen you avoiding him…"
Frostmask's ears flattened guilty.
"So, I just wanted to make sure you're okay," Poolcloud continued, studying her with concern.
"I'm okay..." Frostmask meowed slowly, even though she knew it wasn't totally true.
But, she grimaced at the thought of Poolcloud finding out that only a heartbeat before he appeared, she had been standing alone, feeling lost in their own camp... If Poolcloud knew, it'd just make him fret about her like he was about Autumnleap, and Frostmask felt bad about worrying him.
Poolcloud glanced at her as if he didn't totally believe her, and Frostmask ducked her head.
"Kinda okay," she qualified.
"Autumnleap told me a bit about what happened," Poolcloud said in a soft voice.
Frostmask winced faintly, shutting her eyes for a moment.
"He did?" she meowed, dread in her voice.
Poolcloud nodded solemnly. Frostmask glanced at his face again, afraid to find anger towards her there for how badly she reacted that day to Autumnleap, but Poolcloud's expression was just sympathetic.
"I didn't mean to hurt his feelings," Frostmask whispered. "I just..."
Her voice trailed off, and she sighed. She didn't really want to get into the whole story right now. Poolcloud seemed to understand, so he just walked over to her so he could lean against her side, his long, dense fur enveloping her.
"You know, I'm here for you if you ever want to talk about anything," Poolcloud said.
He rumbled a quick purr.
"Or if you want to just hang out and not talk about anything," he said.
Frostmask pressed herself back against him and gave his shoulder fur a brief lick so he knew his words were appreciated.
"Thanks Poolcloud," she mewed.
Dampfang, Pineshade, Cedarpaw, and Cricketpaw entered through the thorn tunnel then, and Frostmask pulled away from Poolcloud. She shook her head, trying to dislodge her thoughts about Autumnleap.
"I have to go talk to them," she explained to Poolcloud, nodding in Dampfang's and Pineshade's direction.
"Alright, I'll see you later," he said, nodding in goodbye.
Frostmask turned away and strode over to Dampfang, Pineshade and their apprentices, her chin held up in what she hoped was a confident and collected expression.
"I gave Sedgestar the report," she said, locking her gaze on Dampfang. "He wants to speak with you, Dampfang."
Dampfang glanced at her, his eyes narrowing suspiciously, but when he spoke, he was icily polite.
"Of course. Thank you, Frostmask," he meowed, brushing past her to head towards Sedgestar's den.
"Cricketpaw, take Cedarpaw to the medicine cats' den, and then take a break for a while," Pineshade meowed to the apprentices. "Also, make sure you two tell Clearstream and Elmclaw that the injuries are rat bites. And, you should get checked out yourself for your cough, Cricketpaw. I heard you wheezing a bit on the way back."
Cricketpaw and Cedarpaw nodded, their gazes glazed with exhaustion. They were propping each other by leaning their shoulders together, and they staggered side by side to the medicine cats' den. Even though they'd only been out for a half a day, Cricketpaw and Cedarpaw were clearly wiped out.
Well Cricketpaw was sick not that long ago. And, Cedarpaw was pretty chewed up by the rats... so they probably have good reason to be tired.
"Not the greatest first day out of camp," Frostmask thought out-loud, her gaze still on the apprentices.
She glanced at Pineshade to see if she'd agree, but the she-cat was silent. Frostmask's tail twitched.
She probably was still mad at Frostmask for arguing with her about Dampfang.
Frostmask huffed quietly to herself at the thought.
"What?" Pineshade snapped, the fur on her shoulders already rising defensively.
"I didn't say anything," Frostmask muttered, turning away from her.
Frostmask figured it was better to just walk away than to start another fight. She'd try again a different day to make up with Pineshade. A day when Dampfang wasn't around.
"But, I can tell you want to say something," Pineshade said, the snarl obvious in her voice. "You've already spent the past moon brooding on it. So, just spit it out Frostmask."
Frostmask clenched her jaw, then turned to face her. Pineshade was glaring at her, her spiky black fur prickling.
Fine.
Pineshade wanted to hear her grievances? Then she'd tell her. But, not in front of all their clan-mates.
Frostmask jerked her chin towards the thorn tunnel and stalked out of camp, leaving Pineshade to follow. Frostmask led them a ways away into the forest, until she could be reassured that no clan-mates back in camp would overhear them. Then she turned to Pineshade. Frostmask exhaled forcefully through her nose, trying to wrangle her emotions under control.
"Look, you know I don't like Dampfang," Frostmask said, doing her best to keep her voice level and calm despite the annoyance that smarted just beneath the surface. "Even ignoring all the frog-brained stuff that happened today, I don't think he's a good mate for you, and I don't even think he's a nice cat—"
"You don't know the side of him that I do," Pineshade snapped, and Frostmask felt her calm facade starting to crumble.
"I just don't understand," Frostmask growled, attempting but failing to stifle the anger that boiled inside her. "Out of all the cats in the clan, why him? There are so many other nicer toms. Why did you have to pick the one that's tormented me the most out of anyone?! And, hasn't even ever apologized for it!"
Pineshade lashed her tail agitatedly. But, she looked more torn than angry.
"I'm sorry about what Dampfang's done to you," Pineshade said. "But, I told you that I'd do my best to make sure that he's never like that again. And, ultimately, the reason I'm with him has nothing to do with you."
"But, don't you care about me?" Frostmask snapped, her back arching defensively as she took a pace back from Pineshade.
Frostmask's eyes stung as she blinked hard at Pineshade. The subdued embers of hurt and anger now suddenly roared to life like a fire in her chest. A part of her hated how she was being right now. She knew she was losing control again, just like what had happened when she spoke to Autumnleap. Her paws shook and her heart hammered in her ears, urging her to flee from the source of her distress. But, she dug her paws into the freezing snow, determined not to run away this time.
Pineshade stared at her, and her demeanor softened, the fur on her back flattening. Frostmask found her tension also easing some in response to Pineshade's deescalation.
"Of course I care about you, frog-brain," Pineshade murmured. "But, I also love Dampfang."
Pineshade's amber eyes were pleading like they were the first time she told Frostmask about Dampfang, asking for her to understand. Frostmask forced her posture to relax, loosening her taunt muscles with some difficulty. Frostmask stared down at the ground as the icy air around her cooled the anger in her chest.
"He doesn't deserve it," Frostmask muttered to the snow.
Pineshade didn't say anything in response, evidently knowing that there was nothing she could do to change Frostmask's mind on that front. Silence hung between them for a long few heartbeats as Frostmask tried to figure out what to say.
Grovepelt is right. There's room for more than one cat in someone's heart. I should try to act like it, instead of fighting with Dampfang over Pineshade like she's some kind of prize to be won.
Frostmask sighed heavily and all at once, she felt the rest of the anger drain out of her.
"I spoke with Grovepelt this morning," Frostmask said in a low voice, glancing back up at Pineshade.
Pineshade angled an ear in her direction.
"Oh, you did?" she asked.
"Yeah," Frostmask said. "…He helped me see some sense."
"He has an infuriating way of doing that," Pineshade said drily.
Frostmask felt a soft purr rising in her throat, one that Pineshade echoed, and the tension between them began melting like the snow in warm sunlight.
"I'm sorry for how I've been ignoring you," Frostmask meowed, blinking at her. "I still don't agree with you being with Dampfang… but I care about you too. And, I want to be your friend. As long as I didn't already ruin that by being a badger for the past moon."
Pineshade shook her head.
"You didn't ruin anything, frog-brain," she meowed. "I know it must've come as a shock to you."
Frostmask sighed.
"Honestly, I don't know if I'll ever understand it," she admitted.
Pineshade took a few paces closer so she could stand by Frostmask's side.
"Then I won't try to convince you," Pineshade said in a quiet voice. "If you don't want me too."
Frostmask nodded, and Pineshade cast her a glance out of the corner of her eye.
"And, I won't try to make you forgive him either," she murmured.
"Thank you," Frostmask said.
Pineshade arched a brow at her, her expression becoming more light-hearted.
"And, I propose we should try to limit the time all of us patrol together too," Pineshade said drily.
Frostmask purred in response.
"That I can definitely agree with," she meowed.
Frostmask felt lighter than she had in a while as the two of them began to pad back towards camp, walking side by side. It felt like she'd been walking on a thorn in her pad for the past moon, and she finally had dug it out. Maybe the wound hadn't completely sealed over yet, but at least now it was beginning to heal.
"Okay, well now that we've agreed that we're friends again," Pineshade said and Frostmask purred quietly at the playfulness in her voice. "I'm dying to know: what's up with Autumnleap? For the past few days, he's been going around looking like someone's put mouse-bile in his water. But, the frog-brain won't tell me what's wrong when I ask him, of course."
Frostmask jerked in surprise at the sudden mention of Autumnleap and stumbled over her own paws in what was probably the most obviously suspicious manner possible. Pineshade stopped walking to stare at Frostmask. Her black-furred tail started to twitch in badly contained excitement.
"Oh, you know something don't you?" Pineshade meowed.
"I- I-" Frostmask tripped over her tongue as she felt embarrassed heat rising to her ears.
Pineshade started to purr in amusement, which just made Frostmask's pelt warm more.
"This must be good!" Pineshade's amber eyes shone with eagerness as if she was dying to know what piece of juicy gossip Frostmask had on Autumnleap. "Come on! Tell me!"
Frostmask groaned, dipping her chin to rasp her tongue over her chest fur in a futile attempt to quell her embarrassment.
What do I do?
Pineshade had already figured out that Frostmask knew what happened, so there was no use lying to her. Frostmask could tell her that she didn't want to talk about it, but that'd just be delaying the inevitable. Pineshade was obviously very curious, and Frostmask knew that she was an easier target for Pineshade than Autumnleap. So knowing the determined she-cat, Pineshade would just relentlessly needle Frostmask until she caved. Telling her now seemed like the less-painful option.
…Maybe it actually wouldn't be so bad. Although Pineshade certainly couldn't offer the warm support Poolcloud could, she was analytical and clever. Maybe Pineshade had some insight into the situation which Frostmask had missed.
"Well?" Pineshade prompted, her tail flicking from side to side behind her,
"It's horribly embarrassing," Frostmask meowed in a low voice. "But, not for who you think."
Pineshade tilted her head to the side, considering.
"...You?" Pineshade said slowly.
"Yes," Frostmask admitted.
Pineshade's eyes stretched wide.
"What happened?" she demanded.
Frostmask sighed heavily and padded over to the shelter of a nearby spruce tree to take a seat on ground that wasn't covered in snow. Pineshade mirrored her, her curious gaze never wavering from Frostmask's face.
"We got into a fight," she muttered.
Pineshade blinked in surprise.
"You two never fight," she meowed.
"There's a first time for everything," Frostmask said with bitter humor.
Pineshade tilted her head to the side again.
"I did notice that you and him didn't seem to be spending much time together recently," Pineshade meowed. "But, I wasn't sure if I was imagining it."
"We've hardly talked in days," Frostmask admitted.
Pineshade's already wide eyes went as round as moons.
"That's serious," she said.
Frostmask nodded grimly, giving a reluctant sigh. She braced herself. She had to tell Pineshade the full story.
"What happened was..." Frostmask mewed haltingly. "Well... he told me that he loved me, and I got overwhelmed and ran away from him."
For a heartbeat, Pineshade just stared at her in silence as Frostmask's words sunk in.
"Everything's ruined," Frostmask sighed.
"Oh is that all?" Pineshade meowed at the same time.
Frostmask blinked at Pineshade in confusion.
"What?" she meowed. "What do you mean?"
Pineshade's brow furrowed.
"I was expecting something much worse," Pineshade said, giving a dismissive tail-flick. "You've just bruised his ego a bit. He'll get over it."
"I ran away from him," Frostmask emphasized, staring at her in bewilderment.
"Not the best choice in response," Pineshade admitted. "But, the situation just doesn't really seem like that big of a deal? What I'm most surprised about is that you two haven't talked about something like this sooner. I mean, given the way he's been mooning after you for seasons."
Frostmask felt her fur flush with heat again.
"I didn't know that," she muttered, staring down at her paws.
Pineshade purred in amusement.
"You had no idea?" Pineshade meowed. "Autumnleap isn't like exactlythe most subtle cat in the forest."
Frostmask felt her pelt growing even warmer at Pineshade's teasing.
"Maybe I suspected something, towards the end," Frostmask said. "But, I didn't, I guess, think the confession would be so... abrupt."
Pineshade arched a brow at her.
"Was it abrupt though?" she meowed. "I mean, clearly you weren't picking up on any of the hints, so what other choice did he have but to tell you? If you were just a little less oblivious—"
"Pineshade!" Frostmask complained. "Not helping!"
Pineshade rolled her eyes but gave a brief purr.
"Alright, I'll stop," Pineshade meowed.
She prodded Frostmask's side with her paw playfully.
"You just make teasing you so easy," Pineshade purred.
Frostmask swatted Pineshade's paw away, but the movement wasn't angry.
"But, it's a serious situation!" Frostmask meowed. "I'm worried that he doesn't want anything to do with me! I feel like our friendship is ruined..."
Pineshade's tail twitched as she thought.
"He probably just needs more time," she meowed after a few heartbeats of silence. "I don't think you've ruined your friendship. I mean, I'm sure his feelings might still be a bit hurt, but Autumnleap acts like you personally put the sun and the moon in the sky. He's not gonna stop thinking that just because of this argument."
Frostmask ducked her head at the unexpectedly sweet comment from Pineshade.
"Besides, if Autumnleap and I can still mostly get along after all the snake-dung that we've done to each other in the past," Pineshade continued with a shrug. "Then you two will definitely be able to make up."
Frostmask nervously kneaded her claws into the hard ground.
"But, it's more than an argument," Frostmask murmured. "He was being vulnerable with me and I… I…"
"Ripped his exposed underbelly open?" Pineshade suggested.
Frostmask stared at her, aghast.
"That's terrible!" Frostmask gasped, the mental image of Autumnleap's wounded stomach after the SkyClan battle appearing in her mind.
"Stabbed him in the heart?" Pineshade amended, titling her head.
"Pineshade!" Frostmask said, widening her eyes at her.
"Have you talked to him about what happened?" Pineshade briskly continued on, ignoring her.
Frostmask's tail twitched.
"I apologized for running away from him," Frostmask meowed softly. "But, we didn't really talk about the conversation itself… honestly I've kinda been avoiding him because it's just really awkward, and I'm really embarrassed."
Pineshade arched a brow at her, her expression somehow amused, bemused, and pitying at the same time. It was as if Pineshade was watching a snake bite at its own side rather than the piece of fresh-kill in front of it. Wondering if she should intervene and try to help the poor creature, or if she should just watch the entertaining self-inflicted tragedy unfold.
"What?" Frostmask meowed defensively.
Pineshade gave the most exaggerated eye roll that Frostmask had ever seen, but managed to hold in the taunts that clearly sat on the tip of her tongue.
"Maybe the solution is to actually talk with him about the conversation and your feelings?" Pineshade said as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "I mean, how do you feel about him? Do you like him as more than a friend?"
Frostmask scuffled her paws on the ground, not making eye-contact with Pineshade.
"I'm not sure," she mumbled. "Everything is so confusing. I feel like I never really thought about him that way before... back when I was oblivious I mean. And, now I don't know... But, I don't feel like I want a mate right now. I just want things to be like they were before. I want things to be normal."
"Then tell him that," Pineshade said with a flick of her tail.
Frostmask flipped her tail worriedly as a line from her conversation with Autumnleap came back to her: her asking him why things couldn't be normal, and him telling her that he couldn't go on like that.
Frostmask looked at Pineshade.
"He won't like hearing that," Frostmask murmured.
"Okay, sure," Pineshade said, waving her tail dismissively. "But, it's tons better than running away from him and then barely speaking to him. I mean, since you've been avoiding him, he's probably got his tail twisted into a dozen knots, worried that you hate him now, because he confessed to you."
Frostmask felt a heavy stone drop down into her stomach, and her eyes widened.
"Oh," she breathed in a soft voice. "I hadn't thought about that."
Pineshade snorted with amusement.
"Of course you didn't, frog-brain," she said, her amber eyes glinting as if she couldn't resist the final jab. "So, you've got nowhere to go but up."
Author's Note: Pineshade's method of helping: 90% merciless teasing. 10% good advice. Frostmask really does need Pineshade around though to give her a kick in the right direction when she gets bogged down by her own worries. Thank you everyone for reading and reviewing!
Reviews: Brian.H.H: Very true, that's a really good analysis on Dampfang and Paledusk/villains in general! Haha yeah another thing Frostmask has learned from Swoopstrike is to really stand up to herself to cats like Dampfang. She's become a lot more self-assured as she's gotten older, so she'd no longer taking Dampfang's behavior lying down, and she's more than capable now to fire back haha. Although I think some bubbling anger towards Dampfang for "taking" Pineshade away from her definitely put fuel on the fire here. And, thanks, I'll be back with the next chapter soon!
Autumnleap: Aw thank you! I'm so glad you like it.
jason1777717: Haha I'm working on more! Thank you so much for the review! It's great to have you reading :)
opalsharma10: Thank you for the review and for reading! And, to answer your question, yes Lizardpaw is deaf. He prefers to communicate mostly through signs, but he can read lips (although not with 100% accuracy.) Frostmask communicates with him through both signs and verbally, and when she speaks to him verbally, I think it's safe to assume that she is also supplementing her words with signs since she knows it's his preferred method of communication. I know that she doesn't have to speak to him verbally if she is speaking and signing at the same time, but I imagine that while Frostmask is pretty fluent in their paw-sign language by now, she is generally more comfortable speaking out loud, which is why she does both.
Simitria: Haha I think we all are! Also, I like the "misplacing her spine" comment haha. It's a common affliction for Pineshade when she's around Dampfang lol :p
Avalanche: Yeah, sadly Dampfang is still a jerk. Pineshade just likes him for some inexplicable reason haha. (Although, if I were to be serious, I would say that he is a talented fighter, which impresses Pineshade, and she also likes him for his bravery. But, yeah, he's not particularly nice.) But, good news that now Pineshade and Frostmask have made up!