Rifiuto: Non Mirena

A/N: Written: 2013.- Licia

Two Months Later

Day by day, hour by hour, it was getting easier and easier for her to fill the role left behind by her alternative self.

They hadn't stopped trying to figure out what had sent Jo into this timeline, but between the disasters, near-death experiences, constant threats of world elimination and parenthood,what time they had was often limited to what they could carve out among the chaos. Zane had taken to bringing a tablet with data he could analyze on it home, taking a hour or so before going to bed to look over it for anything that might lead them to what had caused Jo's mysterious appearance. From what they could figure, it wasn't due to the Einstein-Grant Bridge device; that thing had never worked, and it sat rusting in the Eureka Museum, not even brought out for Founders' Day.

Not that Jo minded; she was quickly becoming content to have the investigation into her sudden appearance stall, and didn't particularly want to think about would happen if- when, because this was Eureka, and it would only be a matter of time- Zane and the others found the cause of her mysterious arrival in their version of Eureka. And while they researched and pieced together Jo's mystery, the woman in question was piecing together Zane's.

She found Zane's life with her just as fascinating- from their first meeting to their marriage to the births of their girls- but also exceedingly rage inducing.

Not at him, never at him.

At herself.

Jo could honestly say she'd never been more mad at herself than she was now. That her counterpart would be so callus, so flippant, in regards to her marriage- it didn't make sense! Sure, she and Evan had been together once, back in her original timeline, long before Jo had ever even heard of Eureka, but that was when they'd been kids, and any relationship that had developed afterwards- especially during the startup of Cross Photonics- had been fleeting, a passing fancy. They were ships passing in the night, meeting for a moment on the wide open ocean, never to cross paths again. Jo knew that, she understood that- and the fact that her counterpart hadn't, or didn't, or refused to admit it...

This takes being mad at yourself to a whole new level.

All the research she'd done, the home videos she'd watched, the stories she'd listened to- from the girls and Zane- were making it easier for her to fit into this timeline. She was no longer playing Jo Donovan, she was Jo Donovan. The kisses and touches and steamy looks she often shared with Zane behind their coworkers' backs or over their heads were no longer fake and awkward, but very, very real. Awkwardness had turned to passion, passion into a spark- their spark, that very familiar spark she had felt with Alternative Zane and the original- which had gone and started a wildfire, consuming them both and planning on leaving no survivors.

It was always there, in every timeline.

And surprisingly, though they shared a bed, they hadn't fallen into bed together- not yet.

Jo sighed, setting her data pad aside.

In the two months that had passed since her arrival, Jo had fallen into work easier than she had her home life; then again, she knew the ins and outs of GD like the back of her hand, so it wasn't too difficult to fall back into her role as the Director of Security. Her home life though, left much to be desired. Not so much her relationship with Annaleigh or Eleanora, or even with Zane; they were all perfectly willing to help her with whatever she didn't know or wasn't sure of. Slowly, the girls had come around as well; there were no more awkward silences over dinner, no more cautious glances when out in public, no more snickers or disdainful looks thrown at Jo behind her back, except for occasionally. It was Caterina who was the 'issue'- Jo balked; she hated using that word- but then again, Cate was a teenager, after all. Balking at her mother's authority was to be expected; but the disdain she held for Jo...

That was an entirely new issue; one Zane was constantly having to referee. At this point, Jo wasn't sure if she was grateful for summer break or not. With a sigh, she sat back in her chair and quickly swivelled it to face the computer; she'd come in a month earlier and changed things around, putting her computer in the open space in the wall behind her to give herself more space on her desk. It was slowly, starting to look more and more like her office back in the Alternate timeline. She'd stuck the letters her counterpart had written in the bottom drawer of her desk, not quite ready to deal with them yet.

With a sigh, she sank back in her chair, putting her foot against the lower ledge beneath where her computer sat and steepling her fingers. She closed her eyes, forcing herself to take a couple deep breaths to gather her thoughts. She wasn't in the mood to deal with Zane's daughters- no, her daughters, for however long she was here, they were her daughters as well- or the eggheads in this facility. It didn't help that she had to oversee one of Dr. Parrish's demonstrations down in the NLWPs lab; something about a crowd control device or... honestly, she'd zoned out when Henry had told her what they were working on. Clearly, regardless of the timeline, Dr. Parrish was still a pompous, self-serving ass. Some things never changed, even if the timeline did.

She heard the door to her office click open, and released a slow breath crossing her legs. "What do you need, babe?"

Silence, as the footsteps stopped. She could hear Zane's brow furrowing in confusion, his quick glance around, and the realization that she'd simply swiveled her chair around to face the back. The footsteps started up again, but before she could turn around, he was leaning against the back wall of her office, hands in the pockets of his jeans, the silver clasp of his belt glinting in the light as he crossed one foot over the other. Jo had quickly discovered that while she usually chose pantsuits, Zane alternated between suits and jeans, button downs and blazers; on the very rare occasion he wasn't feeling like going full out 'Section Five Head', he'd wear a plain white or black shirt with a button down; similar to what he'd worn in the original timeline, only without the hoodies. It had quickly become apparent to her that her husband's style was a mesh of her original timeline, her Alternate timeline and this one. "Whatever strikes your fancy as long as it's still professional," She concluded one night after dinner when they'd been clearing the table. He'd simply shrugged and kissed her, much to the girls' chagrin. "Well, this is new."

She raised an eyebrow at his smirk. "I don't feel like dealing with people today."

"Present company excluded, I hope."

She smirked, and with a soft snort, lowered her hands. "The father of my children? Always." She replied, as he pushed himself away from the wall and moved closer. Seeing that as his allowance, with one hand resting on either arm of her chair, he leaned down, meeting her gaze.

"Now you're gettin' it." He breathed, capturing her mouth with his. What started off soft, soon grew, and she reached up, sliding one hand around to cup his neck and tangle in his hair. Their familiar sparks jolted at their touch, and Zane sighed softly into the kiss before reluctantly pulling away. "I came to see if you wanted to go get lunch. I was gonna go pick up the girls, since it's... you know, summer," He reached up, gently tucking a loose strand behind her ear. "and then head over to Cafe Diem. Figured we could make a family thing out of it. What'd'ya say, Jojo? Come get lunch with me and our girls?"

She bit her lip. She was sorely tempted- "Lunch sounds fantastic, Zane,"

"But?"

She sighed, slumping back against her chair. "But I have that demonstration down in Dr. Parrish's lab in an hour and a half. Something about... crowd control or... RSK or something."

"The RSS device?" She nodded as he straightened. "They're actually going to test it?"

"What do you mean?" He shrugged, hands back in his pockets.

"Nothing, just... Parrish has been working on that thing for the last couple years. I'm surprised he hasn't scrapped it yet."

She snorted, swiveling her chair to face her desk, as he perched on the edge. "Apparently not. Maybe he should."

His brow furrowed. "What'd'ya mean?"

She looked up from the paperwork she'd been neglecting. "Nothing. Just as long as it doesn't induce major rage, it should be fine. Who knows, in this time, Parrish might actually be a competent asshole."

Now Zane was really confused. "I'm... sorry, what?" She waved it away, and he caught her hand. "Oh, no you don't. You know something. Come on, Jojo, what is it?"

She sighed, her paperwork abandoned as she turned to him. A quick glance around, before she reached for the button on the underside of her desk that activated the sonic protocols. Zane inhaled, understanding that this was clearly something from her timeline, but kept quiet. "Look, in the Alternate timeline... Parrish was... well, an ass." Zane snorted softly, playing with her fingers. "And... he had this... RSS device that was supposed to emit a calming affect on crowds to control them-"

"But it did the opposite." She nodded. "Let me guess... some major rage was released on Eureka?"

"No. Just GD."

"I think you'll be safe, babe." She raised an eyebrow, but gave it to him. "Why don't you come with me and the girls? It'll be a chance to spend some time together as a family-"

"We spend time as a family together all the time, Zane. Besides, you can handle three teenage and preteen girls, they are your children after all." She chuckled as he pouted. "Oh what's a'matter, Daddy, don't want to be left alone with your babies? Afraid you can't handle them?"

"I can handle them just fine. I spent a month handling them and their antics while you-" He stopped, as the awkward silence settled between them. "Right. Wrong timeline." He stood, leaning down to steal a kiss. "Want me to at least pick you up something? Your usual?"

"Sure." She deepened it slightly before he pulled away. "Zane-"

"Have fun with Parrish's demonstration." Before she could say anything else, he was out of her office. And then there was that-

Jo wasn't going to pretend that the awkwardness of bringing up her counterpart wasn't there; she had quickly learned that for all Zane's differences with his Alternate and original timeline counterparts, there was one thing that didn't change- his passive-aggressive nature. She sighed; that was something he would never outgrow, no matter how old he got, and no matter what timeline he was in. So far, he'd met her head on with the differences between their timelines, however this... her... was still a sensitive topic to him.

And why wouldn't it be? Her counterpart had all but flaunted her affair in his face, made it very clear that the children she shared with him were not her priority, that the last of his beloved daughters- not necessarily conceived with the intention of saving her parents' marriage- had been, at least on her mother's part, an attempt to put her blatant affair behind her and finally accept that the man she'd chosen to have a family with was the man she needed to stay with. She knew that Zane had never seen Eleanora as a bargaining chip as she had; he'd merely seen the baby they'd created as theirs, an extension of their love, and he treated the girl as such. He'd tried his hardest to shield his daughters from their mother's affair, even at the expense of his own pain.

With a sigh, she pulled the small thumb drive from the pocket of her slacks and studied it. It was the one video she hadn't had the heart to watch; though she'd stumbled upon it one night when she couldn't sleep, and had been downstairs in the living room, watching some of the family videos again. Instead, she'd asked AIDA to download it onto a thumb drive, determined to watch it when she next had a chance.

Taking a deep breath, she swiveled back to her computer and turned it on, sticking the thumb drive into the port once it was up and running. Quickly clicking on the video, she sat back and let it play. Nothing happened for several minutes, before her counterpart appeared on screen, taking a seat on the bed in what appeared to be a hotel room of some sort. Dressed in a pair of jeans, a tank top and a sweater, her hair tumbled down her shoulders in waves and she pulled her legs beneath her and took a deep breath.

"Hi Zane, I... I know you're probably watching this and scratching your head, wondering why you're getting a video message from me instead of... me being back in Eureka. Simple, really. I'm not coming back to Eureka." She looked around the room, running her hands slowly over the comforter she was sitting on. "Look, it's not that I don't love you, Zane, I just... I'm not in love with you anymore. And maybe I never was. Don't get me wrong, I love our girls, they're wonderful, but... but this marriage, this family? This... job? That town? I can't do it anymore, Zane. I'm not happy. I tried. I really tried, and I thought... I thought if we had Eleanora..." She paused, biting her lip.

"I thought that if we had Eleanora, then, maybe she would help save our marriage. I was wrong. I just..." A moment passed, as she took a deep breath. "I can't do it anymore, Zane. I'm sorry. But I'm not happy here, I'm not happy with you. I've come back up to Vancouver, and I'm going to take my old job back, at Cross Photonics. You've already got the divorce papers, all you need to do is sign them. And I'm giving you full custody of the girls; I know you'll raise them better than I ever could. I was never meant to be a wife or a mother. Please, let the girls know that this isn't their fault; some marriages just... don't work out. Ours just happens to be one of them."

Her blood boiling, she yanked the thumb drive from the computer, studying it for the briefest of moments before turning and yanking open the bottom drawer where the letters were. She tossed the thumb drive into the drawer, and slammed it shut, standing and straightening her jacket. That... that... selfish bitch! How dare she- Her thoughts were interrupted by the alarm going off on her PDA. With a roll of her eyes, she stormed out of her office.

Thank God she had Parrish's stupid demonstration now, otherwise she'd probably have hunted her counterpart down- in whatever timeline she was in- and rip her limb from limb.