On Monday, Stephanie sat down at lunch along side with her friends, chatting jubilantly until she spotted her former bully out of the corner of her eye, marching towards the group.
She crossed her arms and pointed him out to her friends who copied her motion and glared. She still felt nervous seeing him.
"Hey, I know it's weird for me to ask, but…" the boy murmured, scratching the back of his head. "Can I sit with you guys?"
A bit shocked, the group dropped their defenses. "You really want to sit with us?" Stingy asked aloud, his arms uncrossing.
"Yeah, if that's okay with you guys." He clenched the tiny bag in his hands. "If not, I can go sit somewhere else."
Trixie squinted slightly. "Why do you want to sit with us instead of your other friends?" She glanced over his shoulder at where Tristan and Paul sat.
"To tell ya the truth, they don't want me sitting with them anymore."
Confused, Stephanie stepped forward. "Why not? That's not very nice of them."
"I told them about yesterday, and they got mad at me." He rubbed the back of his head again, frowning slightly.
Visibly upset at that, Stephanie rubbed the boy's shoulders. "Well, if you promise to be nice you can sit with us."
Nodding, the boy sat down, pouting.
"So, why are they upset at you?" Pixel asked, a bit lost. "They left you all alone."
"I know." Gabe huffed, opening his lunch box. "But they think you guys are weird…kinda like I did before. And I still don't understand you guys a lot, but…" he took a deep breath, "I thought…maybe if you guys let me, I'd try and learn."
Tina hummed at that. "What do you mean, 'learn more about us?'" She sounded unconvinced by his polite façade.
"Well, ya know…about the whole LGBTQ thing…I was always told it was something bad, but…after how you guys were so nice to me yesterday, I feel like maybe I should learn for myself…" He seemed embarrassed. "Maybe I should just go sit alone, I don't want to bother you guys."
"Wait!" Stephanie murmured, catching his wrist. "How about you join the group with us?"
The kids all whispered and muttered in uncertain tones, their eyes glued on Stephanie and the boy.
"Are you sure that's okay?" The boy seemed lifted up by the offer. "After how I acted..."
"Do you promise to call her Stephanie, and only Stephanie?" Trixie interrogated, and Ella joined in as well.
"And only use she and her when you refer to Stephanie. She's a girl."
The boy nodded. "Yeah, I can do that." He smiled at the group. "Thank you guys so much. I promise I'll try and be nice."
"You better be." Stingy murmured, causing the group to laugh a little at their own protective antics.
"Anyway, you said you're on the football team, right? What's that like?" Trixie leaned over and questioned the boy, the group continuing on jubilantly until recess came.
Gabe volunteered to teach the group some of his dance moves when they spotted his two ruthless and usually loyal lackeys approaching the group. Nervously, some of the kids stepped back, leaving Stephanie, Trixie, and Gabe on the front lines.
"Hey Gabey." Tristan growled upon the sight of the other boy. "Why you hanging around with these bozos?"
Gabe nervously glanced between his ex-friend and the two girls on his sides. "I was teaching them to dance."
Paul laughed. "Why? Didn't your mom just make you join that talent show?"
"Yeah... don't tell me you actually like dancing? You're a bigger loser than I thought." Tristan laughed, and Trixie stood in front of the boy.
"What do you want?" She glared him down, her hands clenched in fists.
Tristan snickered and pushed her away. "Out of the way, girlie."
Trixie didn't take the words well, and with a glance to her friends and back to the bully, she wound up her fist and punched Tristan in the nose. The boy covered his nose momentarily, and upon the sight of blood, he turned to punch Trixie back.
Gabe stood in front of the girl and watched his friend hesitate. "Leave us alone."
The two bullies stared them down, grinding their teeth. "You'll regret this, Gabey." Tristan growled, turning away and departing from the group, Paul following him with a reluctant look back towards his old best friend.
Luckily, none of the kids got in trouble for Trixie's confident punch because of how the boy had shoved her before-hand. The two got off on a warning and went back to class as if it didn't happen.
Stephanie turned to Gabe as the group was walking back inside. "You really stood up for us back there. Thank you, Gabe."
The boy laughed awkwardly and rubbed the back of his head. "Was the least I could do. You guys were so nice to me…I know you would have done the same."
"That's right!" She cheered, smiling down at him. "Remember to ask your mom if you can join the club today."
He nodded and the two bounded off to class.
That afternoon, Gabe sat down with his parents at dinner, chomping down on the roast beef and vegetables that is father had made that evening. While the two were focused on their food, Gabe sat down his fork and glimpsed up at them. "I'm thinking of joining another club."
His mother flickered her eyes upwards. "And what club is that?"
"The LGBTQ club." He took a bite of his food and watched as his mother wiped her lips, her eyebrows knit in thought. His father just stared, surprised.
"That's fine." His father uttered, returning to his food.
"That is everything but fine! Gabe, you are a Carter, you are not going to join some sick freak-show club." She stood up, her husband following.
"Honey, it's just a club, it's not going to do anything to do him." His father reasoned, as the two made their way into the kitchen, Gabe staring after them in confusion.
"What if it does? I don't want a gay son." She wiped her brow, as Gabe peeked into the room and watched his parents argue. "Maybe I've been too soft on him. That's what I get for letting him join a dancing class."
The two adults went back and forth until Gabe had eaten his entire bowl of food, that now felt like slimy slop in his stomach. Lost, the boy made his way up the stairs and to his room, tossing his laptop open. Once Youtube was opened, he searched up videos on LGBTQ people and leaned his head against a pillow, dozing off as he learned some of the common terms.
Once he was finished, he turned his laptop off and lay down with the lights off, staring at the wall in concentration. He couldn't comprehend his mother's thought process, and he felt sick thinking about how upset he had made her by simply bringing up the club. The distant sound of his parents arguing still droned on in the hallway, and he found himself tearing up a bit.
Why was she being so hateful? All he had asked was to join a club in school to support the few people who made him feel appreciated. At least his father seemed fine with it. Maybe if he asked his father the next day, he'd be allowed.
As if summoning his parents, he heard the creaking of his bedroom door, and he knew by the shadow that if turned around he would see his mother staring down at him. Instead, he closed his eyes and ignored her presence.
"My son is not joining that club." She whispered to her husband, who simply hummed, as if giving in. "He's my baby. I can't let them corrupt him."
Gabe felt like screaming at her about how nice they had been to him, about how reading what LGBTQ meant how despicable his mother seemed, but he zipped his mouth closed and forced himself to fall asleep.
When the boy went to school the next day and met with his friends at lunch time yet again, he found himself dreading to tell them the news. "I don't know why, but when I asked Mom if I could join, she freaked out on me." He crossed his arms and pouted. "Her and my step-dad fought for hours over it. He thought it would be fine for me to join, but she threw a fit over that and decided I'm absolutely not able to join."
Stephanie exchanged glances with some of her friends. They all had been able to join rather uneventfully, so she had no clue what to say.
Ella leaned forward. "Well, she'll come around. In the meantime, we can sneak you in."
Unsure, the boy fiddled with his hands. "How are we supposed to do that?" He seemed completely defeated.
"Well, isn't there a chess club that meets on Friday nights, too? Why don't you just pretend to join chess, instead?" Trixie suggested, and the boy nodded.
"Yeah, okay… but if Sportacus drops me off, she'll figure it out."
Stingy hummed in concentration. "How about you tell your step-dad, and have him pick you up?"
The boy bit his lip. "I don't know, he'd probably just tell my mom."
"What if you get a chess uniform and just wait in the office a few minutes before the meeting ends? Then she would think you just came from the chess club." Pixel suggested, bringing light back to the boy's eyes.
"That's a perfect idea!" He exclaimed, smiling at it. He could already feel some of his fears melting away. "Hey, you wanted to join the football team, didn't you?" He turned to Trixie, who smiled at the words.
"Well, yeah, but they won't let me on. The other kids said that girls can't play on the team." She huffed at that and crossed her arms. "Why?"
"Well, I know the captain really well, and if you can prove that you're good, he'll be happy to let you join!" Gabe said proudly, warming up to the group. "There's no written rule about girls not being allowed to join. People just assume that."
Trixie puffed her chest out excitedly. "I can really join? That's awesome!"
The next few days went by quickly, with Trixie making the football team jubilantly after she tackled one of the quarterbacks. Right away, she was allowed on, though she had to be explained to that it was flag football and not tackle football. In response, Stingy, Stephanie, Ella, Gina, and Tina all joined the cheerleading team to help support their friends and also be involved in a sport aside from their dancing lessons with each other. In the meantime, Gabe, Pixel, Stephanie, and Ella gleefully joined the science club to help support their friend Stingy,
At one point, one of the kids had brought up the possibility of a fundraiser, and Stephanie suggested a bake sale during the meeting of the week. To make sure everyone had something they could eat samples of, they made sure to assign certain allergen-free treats to some kids, while others took on decorating the bags that the snacks were put into.
"What are we going to do with the money?" Gina signed to her friends one day, staring confused at the stack of cookies in front of her while the group worked together in the kitchen.
Ella noticed and hummed in thought before signing back that she would ask Sportacus.
Approaching the man who gingerly stirred some of the dairy and egg free brownie batter, she tapped him on his back and he spun around, a wide smile on his face.
"What's going on, Miss Ella?"
"We were wondering…we're doing a fundraiser, but what for? What are we going to use the money on?" She asked, twisting her arms behind her back.
"Hmmm… well it was going to be a surprise, but I guess I can tell you all now. Go get the other kids."
Ella did as she was told and the rest of the kids all stood around the man, bits of frosting and filling and icing splattered on the group's aprons. Sportacus smiled at the innocence and set his bowl and whisk down, waving over the present parents as well.
"Little Ella was wondering what we're raising money for. Is it alright if I tell them?" Sportacus asked Mr. Simpcan, who grinned widely.
"Alright, go ahead."
Sportacus cleared his throat, and every voice that belonged to a child went silent as they leaned forward in anticipation. "Well, we were thinking about taking all you kids on a field trip. If we make enough money for that, of course."
Right away, the kids erupted into cheers and Robbie had to shush them.
With cheery faces, the kids all left the room and went back to work.
Sportacus made his way over to the other man, who had a proud smile on his face. "Thank you again for providing us with all these recipes. We couldn't have done it without you."
Robbie glimpsed away abashedly. "Well, my daughter has never been this involved with other kids, and I wanted to do my part." He smiled contently. "She's been much happier since she's joined. And when she does get upset, she's able to cheer herself up faster than she was able to before."
A sly smile on is lips, Sportacus elbowed the other in the side. "You've seemed happier, too."
Robbie cleared his throat awkwardly. "Yes, well. Seeing your children thrive does that to a father. I'm sure you can relate."
"I'm…actually not Stephanie's father."
Intrigued, Robbie turned to the other. "Step-father…?"
Sportacus rubbed the back of his neck at the catechization. "Actually, I'm not related to her at all. It's a long story."
Robbie sipped out of his water and leaned back against the wall he was standing in front of. "Well, we will be here for a while."
With an awkward grin, Sportacus rambled on and on about the situation that Stephanie had been tossed into. Robbie nodded and provided questions every few minutes until the entire story had been told of how she ended up staying with her uncle who was too busy to care for a child.
"So, you're kind of an adoptive father to her?"
Sportacus gazed over at the little girl with softened eyes. "I…don't know how she thinks of it yet, but depending on her parents…I mean, we don't know if they plan to come back or not."
Nodding slowly, Robbie couldn't help but gaze sadly upon the child. "That's tough. Ya know, she doesn't act very upset, so I think that means you're doing a good job."
"You too."
Robbie coughed awkwardly and excused himself. He wasn't used to compliments like this.
By the time everything was baked, the kids were all tired and ready to go home. One by one children were picked up or dropped off, soon leaving just Ella and Stephanie.
With puppy-dog eyes and a pout, Ella approached her father, her hands in a begging motion.
"Dad, can I pretty please stay the night wit Stephanie?" The girl pleaded, shocking the father.
"Well, if that's alright with…"
Sportacus piped up before he could finish the sentence. "Of course it's alright."
Robbie laughed and pulled his daughter aside. "Are you sure you wanna stay the night? Ya think you can do it?"
Ella, while nervous, held a confident grin. "Yeah, I think so."
"If you change your mind in the middle of the night, you know my number, right?"
Snickering, Ella nodded. "Of course I do, Dad!" She grinned proudly up at her father. "So, I'm allowed?"
The man nodded and ruffled his daughter's hair. "Yeah, alright. I'll be going home soon, then, is that alright?" The girl simply nodded again before launching forward and hugging her father tightly and running off.
Once she left his sight, Robbie began searching for his jacket. Once he found it, he departed from the house, leaving his daughter behind.
At exactly 2:06 am, Ella woke up in a sweat. She had a dream of her parents wedding, remembering how she had felt so elated as she twirled in her little flower-girl attire. Her late father had knelt down and called her over, and when she reached him, he lifted her up and held her between him and her living father. The two men kissed and laughed, spinning the little girl around in their arms.
Ella wiped at her eyes. She hated nights like these, where her thoughts drifted to her memories, and she was unable to sleep. Looking over, her mind started to catch up and she realized where she was and why.
She didn't want to wake her friend, but she knew she had to talk to someone. Preferably her father, since he understood her grieving the best.
Still, she felt horrible at the idea of waking him up, so instead she tiptoed into the hall and onto the terrace, overlooking the back yard of the family.
Only now did she realize how cold it was. The concrete ground reminded her of the hospital floors as she pulled herself up onto the railing, dangling her feet over the world.
Staring at the sky, she felt her body stop fighting for glee and shroud itself in memories. When did she start crying? She didn't realize when, but sure enough, tears raced down her hands and onto her skirt. Snot slowly inched out of her nose and she couldn't help but feel alone.
It felt like months since she had been this lonely, but she knew it had only been weeks at most.
Glancing up at the stars, she began to calm down slightly. While the world seemed so large when you looked at the stars, it somehow helped her relax. If the world is so big, her problems will fade over time, just like the stars.
Like the stars, her problems weren't usually there anymore, but they still peaked out from behind the darkness when the timing was right. The thought made her smile and release a shudder that she didn't realize she had been holding.
A thought creeped into her mind and the girl slid off the railing and back onto the terrace, tiptoeing back inside. It didn't take her long to find a few candles and a kitchen lighter, returning to her spot outside, this time with a blanket draped around her shoulders.
Ella remembered seeing people sit in a circle and light candles to speak to the dead in movies, so surely it worked in real life, right? One by one the candles were brought to life with vivid orange and yellow flames. Carefully, she stepped over the flames and into the circle sitting criss-crossed in the center of her circle.
Clearing her throat, the girl began to speak. "Dad? I don't know if this works, but…I have to tell you something."
No response came, but Ella pressed on, if only for her own comfort. "I miss you. A lot. Dad misses you, too." She let another happy memory of one of her birthdays flicker through her mind. "But I've had a hard time remembering details." It was true. The longer she went without him, the harder it became to even recognize him in photos. "I remember what you sound like. Sometimes when I can't sleep, I just listen to your voice on repeat in my head." Taking a deep breath, she felt a shiver run down her spine. "But your face… the longer you're gone, the more gray you become in my memories. And it makes me scared."
Now she couldn't help but sob violently, and she didn't notice the silent silhouette behind her. "I don't want to forget you Dad, but if I do…please forgive me."
The shadowed figure stepped out from where her was hiding, sighing softly. "Ella, are you alright?"
It was Sportacus.
The girl whipped her head around suddenly, and in an attempt to raise her arm and wipe her tears away, a corner of the blanket came up with her and got caught in the flame, immediately catching fire.
Ella stood up right away and stomped the fire out, wrapping her now bare and cold shoulders in her hands. "I'm sorry Mr. Sportacus," she whined softly, looking down at the crisp corner of the blanket.
With a deep sigh, Sportacus reached forward and put out the rest of the candles with his finger-tips. "What were you doing with all of these candles, anyways?"
Ella stared at the ground and tried to stop the tears in her eyes from falling, but she couldn't. "I'm sorry, I was just… I thought I could talk to my dad if I…"
Catching on quickly, Sportacus nodded and stepped a little closer to the girl. He pulled the two lawn chairs apart and set them beside each other, sitting on one. He pat the other one, calling the girl over.
Sighing, she sat down next to him. "I know it's silly to believe in ghosts and heaven and all that junk, I just…I'm really sad."
Giving the young girl a soft smile, Sportacus pulled his jacket off and slid it around the child's shoulders. "Do you want to tell me about why?"
The girl bit her lip. "Only if you promise not to tell my dad." She held out her pinkie, offering it to the other.
Nodding, Sportacus reached forward and pinkie-promised the child, a soft smile on his lips. "So, why are you up so early?"
Bringing her knees to her chest, the girl sighed and rested her chin. "Well, I had a dream about the day my dads got married."
"Why did that make you upset, Ella?" He knew that the girl's other father was dead, but hearing the girl grieve at a seemingly happy memory confused him.
Glimpsing up at the stars, she felt tears start to trickle down her cheeks again. "I just… I really miss him, and it's as if…I'm forgetting about him."
Sportacus reached forward and rubbed the girl's shoulders softly. "What makes you think you're forgetting about him, if you had a dream about him?"
"He's…changing in my dreams." She bit her lip. "His voice never changes, but…his face does, and his skin."
"What do you mean?"
Sighing, Ella returned her eyes to the ground. "His face has more wrinkles. His hair starts graying, and his skin…it looks oily and cold. As if, even in my memories, he's not…he's not alive anymore."
"Have you talked to your Dad about these memories?"
Ella shuddered slightly and sadly gazed at the ground. "Not really. I know we both miss him, but I hate bothering him…"
Sportacus cleared his throat and the girl glimpsed up at him, her eyes still watering. "You aren't bothering him. In fact, I think it helps you both a lot when you talk about it, instead of bottling it up."
"I…don't usually bottle it up. We had a big talk a few weeks ago, and we've been able to laugh at things together again, and we've both been smiling a lot more, but…is it really worth it? Will I ever feel better?"
His lips in a thin line, Sportacus took his eyes off the girl and stared into the sky. "I can't say that you'll ever feel 100% better again, but it will get easier to deal with. Some days you won't even think about him, and that's okay. But sometimes, you'll think about him for hours on end." He brought his eyes back to the child, who stared at him expectantly. "And that's okay, too. And soon, it will start to get easier."
Sighing, the girl leaned her head to the side. "Why does it take so long?"
Sportacus wasn't sure how to console that thought away. Turning his head, he caught the girl's eyes. "I don't have an answer for that. I can't tell you why. But just know that it will get better. Slowly, but it will."
The girl's shoulders tightened and she felt a sob run through her like a criminal being chased by the police. "I don't want to forget him. I only have so many memories of him, I don't want to lose those, too."
"You'll never fully lose those, Ella."
The girl bit her lip as she tried to stop her tears from falling. "Mr. Sportacus, can I have a hug?"
Chucking softly, Sportacus motioned the young child over so she sat on his chair's arm. After crying for about half an hour, the girl dried herself up. "I think I feel a bit better."
The man simply nodded. "It's good to cry every once in a while. It pushes the bad feelings out and makes room for good ones."
The girl nodded and leaned against the man completely now. "Do you think Stephanie will be angry that I burnt one of her blankets?"
"Nah. It wasn't hers." He comforted the child, who laughed a little in response.
"Whose was it?"
"That was one of my spare blanket, but I'm not upset."
Still, the girl gave him an embarrassed smile. "Sorry Mr. Sportacus." A minute passed and she yawned against him. "Why is your name Sportacus, by the way? My dad has been wondering, and I have been, too."
"It's a nickname I got in college. I was always playing a sport, and my friend thought it was funny when I got a little competitive during basketball one day, so he called me Sportacus."
Ella giggled lightly. "Like the war guy, Spartacus?"
Sportacus nodded. "Yeah, like him."
Melting like butter, the girl yawned again. "You're really silly, Sportacus. My dad called you Sportaweirdo when we were in the car the night I asked to join, in fact."
That earned a snort out of Sportacus, who gently stood up, the little girl in his arms. "Really? That's a new one."
"Do people usually give you nicknames like that?" She seemed surprised at his response.
"Yeah, ever since college people have made variations of that original nickname."
Ella grew a sly grin. "Can I give you one?"
Sportacus gave a goofy grin in reply. "Yeah, sure."
"Hm…well, Sportafool doesn't sound too bad, but…it's kinda silly. Let's see, what do you remind me of…" The girl put a finger to her mouth in thought. "You're kinda like a dad to Stephanie, so I think…Sportadad or Sportapop both are good candidates."
Sportacus chuckled along. "Alright, but you do know that I'm not really Stephanie's dad, right?"
The girl rolled her eyes. "Of course I know that. I said you're like a dad. Stephanie has told me about her parents before."
Sportacus paled slightly. "She told you about them?"
Nodding, the girl relaxed into the other's arms. "She explained it during a meeting one night while the parents were talking to each other. She didn't want anyone to get confused and call you her dad."
Sportacus looked a bit upset at the info that even the idea of him being considered the girl's father upset her so much that she went out of her way to tell everyone about her home life, which was no doubt stressful for her.
"But, sometimes, if we're just at school and a kid not in our group asks about you, she'll just say you're her dad. And if the teachers ask, she tells them you're her dad. I think it's easier to o that then explain it all the time for her."
"I imagine." Sportacus mumbled, setting the girl down right outside of her friend's room. "Now, do you think you'll be able to go back to sleep? You'll need it. Your dad says he's coming to get you early tomorrow morning."
The girl nodded before hugging the man tightly. "Thanks, Sportacus. Talking helped me a lot, I think."
Sportacus simply grinned and ruffled the girl's hair before she tiptoed back into the room, staying in there for the rest of the night.
The next morning, Sportacus woke to the sound of someone knocking on the door. A quick glance around downstairs told him that the girls were most likely still asleep, so he let the parent in and ushered him into the kitchen right away, explaining what the purple-clad girl had talked to him about the previous night.
He knew that he promised the child he wouldn't tell, but he couldn't hold in the contents. Worriedly, he suggested therapy to the father, who solemnly nodded.
"Yes, thanks for letting me know. I'll have to call up our old family therapist."
Sportacus nodded and smiled at the man. "Hungry?"
A bit taken aback, Robbie chuckled. "Sure."
By the time the girls had woken up and made their way down the stairs, the two men had already finished eating, but surely, a stack of pancakes awaited the two children. Gleefully, they both took one and chowed down.
At one point as Robbie set his mug of coffee down, he stared the strange blue-clad man down. "Do you… do you have an actual name that I can call you?"
"Oh, of course." Sportacus replied, lifting his glass of orange juice up and holding it gingerly, "my real name is Marcus, but you can keep calling me Sportaweirdo, if you want." With that, he took a long sip of his juice, watching in amusement as the taller man stood up, taking his daughter's hand in his.
Without warning, he lifted up the child and with a smirk started heading towards the living room. "I'll take that as my cue to leave."
That caused everyone to start giggling uncontrollably. Robbie made his way back into the kitchen and set his daughter back down, who gave Sportacus a knowing glance.
Robbie just smirked and went along with it. It was funny, after all.