Chapter 7

Iroh was running as fast as his old legs would let him, down the mountain him and Aang had hiked that morning. When they had spotted the airships, Iroh insisted that Aang leave him behind and go up ahead to fight them. His mastery of the sky was too much of a precious resource against these new machines of war the Fire Nation had created.

Through breaks in the trees, Iroh could catch glimpses of an airship in the sky, as well as flashes of light from the battle. Distant explosions could be heard, muffled by the foliage of the trees. Iroh reached a clearing and the city gate was in sight. He had made it just in time to watch the only airship that had reached the city crash into the mountain base on the opposite side.

"Grandmaster Iroh, there you are," one of the White Lotus guards called out and ran to him. "We've been trying to find you. What are your orders?"

"The battle is over, for now. Focus on tending to the wounded. I will go speak with the other masters and decide what our next moves should be."

The guard saluted Iroh, and Iroh went on his way, heading towards the White Lotus headquarters nearer the center of the city. He kept an eye out for anyone that might need his help; he was so thankful that most of the city was okay. This attack would have been devastating if all three airships had managed to complete their bombardment.

As Iroh walked, he heard someone call from behind him.

"Lee's uncle?"

He turned around and saw the familiar face of a teenage girl. It took Iroh a second to recognize who it was. "You're the girl from the teashop. Jin, right?" he asked. "You went on a date with my nephew."

"I can't believe it's you! I'm so glad you're okay," she said, smiling. "Did Lee make it out of Ba Sing Se too?"

Iroh hesitated to respond, and the weary smile on Jin's face rapidly faded as her mind jumped to the most obvious conclusion. "Oh no…" she whispered.

Iroh let out a sad sigh, knowing he was about to do the wrong thing. He faked a smile and said, "Don't worry about Lee, he wasn't in Ba Sing Se when the attack happened. He left a while ago."

Relief washed over Jin's face. Iroh placed his hand on her shoulder as he continued his warm, but fake smile. "Lee's not going to be able to come back, but I assure you he's safe where he is. I need to get going, but stay safe and try to help anyone that needs it. I'm afraid we might see more attacks like this in the future."

"Thanks," she gave him a quick, friendly hug and left. Iroh continued on his way. He could feel his eyes sting as they became watery. Not from sadness, but from anger. He hated that he had to lie to that poor girl. Hate was something that he had worked so hard to purge from his heart, but now after everything that had happened, he began to feel nothing but hatred for his brother, Ozai. He knew that Ozai would not stop at Ba Sing Se's destruction. He would keep trying until the entire world was conquered, or destroyed.

. . .

A war meeting was about to start in Iroh's tent that afternoon. Around his main table sat the White Lotus masters, as well as some other high ranking White Lotus members. Aang, Katara, Toph, and Sokka were there too, sitting next to each other. The table had a large map of the world on its center, with various clay figurines marking places of interest.

"Today's attack was not unexpected," Iroh said. "But what was unexpected was our lack of defensive capabilities against the Fire Nation's airships. The fact is, high-altitude aerial bombardments are a new form of warfare we are not ready for. The city owes their lives to the Avatar and his brave friends, as well as his flying bison. Without them, the city would have been destroyed."

Everyone looked at Aang, Katara, Toph, and Sokka and expressed their gratitude. Aang smiled sheepishly, Katara blushed, and Toph gave a thumbs up.

"It's what we do," Sokka said with a nonchalant shrug.

"Not to dismiss their victory," one of the White Lotus members began to say, "But based on their own account, the battle was won by only a slim margin. What are we to do when more airships come? What if instead of three, they send a dozen?"

"You are correct," Iroh said. "The Firelord—or the 'Pheonix King' as he is calling himself now—has shown that he will not stop until this city is destroyed. I know my brother; he will not take this defeat lightly. Our time is running out, and we will need to strike back, and soon." Iroh then walked over to Aang and said, "Avatar, you have spent the last several weeks training very diligently to learn the ways of fire. It was the last element left on your journey. You have shown incredible talent in your training; you are a natural-born firebender. This morning was to be your final lesson and your mastery of fire is now complete."

One of the White Lotus members said, "So he's mastered all four elements? That means he's a fully realized Avatar! We're ready to strike back at the Fire Nation now!"

Aang was taken aback. Befuddled, he quickly responded with, "What? No, no I'm not. I'm not a fully realized Avatar. There's still a lot I don't know."

"You are correct, there is much left for you to learn. But that is true of all masters. Becoming a master has never been about reaching the point where there is nothing left to learn; quite the opposite. Becoming a master means you have reached the point to truly begin your journey. You should know this, you have already mastered the other elements."

"No, I haven't. Air, yeah, I guess, but not the others. I'm not ready for this yet!"

"Your tattoos are proof of your air mastery. But all your other instructors are here, let's ask them." Iroh looked at Katara and asked, "Is he a waterbending master?"

Katara smiled. "Yes, he is." She looked at Aang and told him directly: "You've been a waterbending master for a long time now, and I'm so proud of you."

"In fact, you're the best pupil Katara's ever had!" Sokka said.

"Uh, he's the only pupil I've ever had."

"Exactly, that's the joke!" Sokka responded and laughed at his own joke. Katara just looked at him, annoyed.

Iroh then spoke to Toph. "How about Earth? Toph, as his teacher, do you believe he's an earthbending master?"

"Alright, let's just get one thing straight," Toph said. "He is not a better earthbender than me. But, then again, who is?" She punched Aang on the arm and said, "Congratulations, Twinkletoes. I officially deem you an earthbending master."

"Heh heh! Let's hear it for the Avatar!" Bumi announced and started clapping. Everyone joined in and applauded, too.

Aang only continued to look more hesitant and afraid as he saw everyone cheering him on. He could see the excitement and hope in everyone's eyes as they all looked at him and applauded.

"Stop it!" he shouted and it all immediately died down. "I'm not ready! I'm not a fully realized Avatar!"

Iroh looked concerned and asked, "You have mastered the four elements. All of your teachers have confirmed it. What else is left?"

Aang felt ready to start crying and closed his eyes tightly to keep tears from forming. "If all I had to do was defeat the Firelord—Phoenix King, or whatever he calls himself—then maybe I'd be ready. But I can't fight him and his armies and his airships. I barely even survived fighting a few airships today! I'm just one kid, I can't do this!"

Aang looked away and angrily wiped at his eyes. Katara tried to put her arm around him to comfort him, but he pulled away.

One of the White Lotus members scoffed and said, "This is our best hope? Some child on the brink of crying?"

"Be quiet!" Iroh angrily shouted at him. "This is the Avatar, and you will show him respect!"

The White Lotus member immediately looked embarrassed and didn't say another word. Aang wanted to be angry at the man, but the truth was, he agreed with him.

Jeong Jeong looked at Aang and said, "I don't understand. The Fire Nation has spent a hundred years looking for you. Why, if you're not a big threat? What about all those historical records of Avatars defeating entire armies?"

"They had the Avatar state!" Aang shouted in response. "I don't have it anymore! I had finally learned how to do it, then like an idiot, I let my guard down and practically got killed. Now it's gone and I can't get it back."

Katara placed her hand on his shoulder and quietly told him, "Please don't get upset. We're just trying to figure out what to do."

"Yeah, it's okay, Aang," Sokka said with a rare sincerity. "We'll figure this out, buddy."

Aang took a deep breath to calm himself down. As he looked at Katara's face, his anger rapidly decayed into sadness. He continued talking, now calmer, but also sadder, as he explained the Avatar State to everyone. "The Avatar State is how I'm able to channel the power and experience of all my past lives. It grants me unbelievable power. I had never been able to fully control it; it was just something that happened when I was in danger or really upset. But then I learned from a guru how to control it. When I finally was able to enter it on my own, I let my guard down and I got taken out. I'm only alive now because Katara was able to bring me back, but now I can't enter it at all anymore. I'll never be a fully realized Avatar until I can control it."

"I saw for myself the power of the Avatar State," Pakku said. "During the siege of the North Pole, the Avatar used it to join with La, the ocean spirit. Together, they decimated the Fire Nation's entire fleet. If we had access to that kind of power on demand, the Fire Nation would not stand a chance."

"That does sound powerful," Piandao said. "But even without this 'Avatar State,' you can still bend all four elements. That's a lot of power, too."

"It's not any better than just having four different types of benders," Aang said. "Four masters wouldn't be able to defeat the Fire Nation, and I can't either."

Sokka's face lit up as he got an idea. "Why don't you go back to the guru? He might still be at the Eastern Air Temple. I bet after a little guru-advice, you'll be back to glowing it up in no time!"

The truth was that Aang had already thought of that in the past. He also knew that if he had properly completed his training in the first place, he might have been able to stop this war already and saved countless lives. It was yet another failure; another source of regret.

"Yeah, good idea, Sokka," Aang said half-heartedly. He was ashamed to go back to the guru after failing him the first time and wished there could be another way. Aang didn't want to go see him, but ultimately, he knew he had no other choice.

"You should leave as soon as you can," Iroh said. "I fear we will need you to face the Firelord before long."

"If I leave on Appa tomorrow morning and we hurry, I can be at the Eastern Air Temple in a day," Aang said.

"The Eastern Air Temple is some distance away. There is a request I need to make of you, on behalf of the entire city: I need you to leave your bison here."

"What?"

"I know it's a big request. Please understand, as it stands, Appa is our only defense against the airships. We're not anticipating any attacks in the immediate future, but we can't be sure. If more of them attack while you're away, we will be completely defenseless."

"What about the airships we shot down? Can't you use them?" Katara asked.

"Those airships are too damaged. We have some engineering students from the Ba Sing Se University studying the wreckage, but it'll be months before we'll have anything viable. The recovered war balloons are easy to fix, but they aren't maneuvrable enough to engage the airships."

Aang sighed and rubbed his eyes, groaning. "How am I supposed to get to the Eastern Air Temple then? I don't even have my glider anymore."

"You can take one of the war balloons. Most of the ones we recovered were minimally damaged, with just some patches needed to repair the punctures."

Aang was visibly unhappy about all of this. In an attempt to comfort him, Sokka said, "Don't worry Aang, I flew in the war balloon prototype with the machinist from the Northern Air Temple. It's pretty good flying! Once they get going, they can move pretty fast. We'll just need to keep bathroom breaks to a minimum since they take a while to ascend or descend."

"I guess we don't have a choice," Aang responded.

"I have another request, Avatar," Iroh said. "I want some of your friends to stay here since they have experience flying your bison, as well as fighting these airships. But I also don't want you to travel alone. You are powerful, yes, but we can't risk you being captured or killed. I think Sokka and Toph should stay behind, and you should take Katara with you."

Me and Katara? Traveling together? Alone? Aang thought to himself. This was still too much information to process right now, but part of him immediately felt a tinge of excitement.

"Twinkletoes and Sugar Queen traveling together? Oh, yeah, I'm sure they'll hate that," Toph teased.

"Be quiet!" Katara snapped, then nervously laughed. "Don't worry Iroh, between Aang and me, there's nobody we can't beat," she said.

"Except Azula and Zuko, apparently," Toph retorted and snickered.

"There were also like fifty Dai Li agents!"

. . .

It was now later in the day and Aang was sitting on top of the crude rock wall that surrounded the refugee city. He sat at the south side of the wall, looking inward toward the north. The whole expanse of the city, which many of the locals started to call Xin Se, laid before him. It was densely packed with small homes, all lacking uniformity in shape. Points of light were starting to appear as the darkness of twilight began to move in.

I guess tomorrow morning I'll set off with Katara, Aang thought to himself. Is this the first time I've ever traveled with just her? I think so. I wonder how long we're even going to be out. It'll just be the two of us. Maybe this will finally be a good time to tell her how I feel. Maybe she'll feel the same way. Maybe we'll get to kiss again—

Ugh, you idiot. What's the matter with you? You already kissed her, and nothing came of it. And you know what? it doesn't matter! You have more important things to worry about! Stop obsessing over her and look at this city. These people are all that's left of Ba Sing Se because you failed. Just like you failed your own people. Just like you failed yourself. So stop being selfish and wasting your time thinking about Katara.

Why are you even going to bother to see the guru? You're just going to fail again. If you had listened to him in the first place and completed your training, you would have mastered the Avatar State already. You could have stopped this war before the Comet, and so many people wouldn't have died. All these people here could have been in their real homes.

Aang held his face and started to cry silently.

A different part of his mind now spoke up in an attempt to comfort him: Stop regretting everything; stop thinking like this. Remember what Avatar Kelzang said. Regret is folly. There's no way to know what truly would have happened. Maybe if you had stayed with the guru and mastered the Avatar State, it would have led to Katara dying when she was captured.

But wouldn't it be better if she did die, but all of Ba Sing Se was spared? Are millions of lives not worth more than hers?

Aang's thoughts came to an immediate end as he refused to follow that line of thinking. He became numb. He hated feeling numb; paradoxically, feeling numb was always worse than feeling pain. He stared blankly out into the distance. The occasional cool breeze hit, making his cheeks sting from his drying tears.

"Heh heh—snort—there you are!" he heard from below. It was Bumi. Aang quickly wiped at his face to dry off any remnants of his tears. Bumi raised a rock platform to lift him up to where Aang was and sat next to him. "I've been trying to find you. There's going to be a celebration tonight, and a party's not a party without at least one airbender!"

"A celebration? For what?" Aang asked.

"You saved the city today! Not dying is always worth celebrating, Heh heh!"

"Wow," Aang muttered. He had been so lost in his depression, he had completely forgotten people out there could be happy, even in such bad times. "The Earth Kingdom is amazing. Nothing can keep them down, huh?"

"Rock is tough, Aang! It's hard to break a rock."

Aang fell silent for a moment before responding. "I don't think I'll go. I don't really feel like celebrating."

"Oh, that's too bad. Your friends are already there, getting things set up. You sure you don't want to come? There'll be music, probably some dancing, too, and airbenders are natural born dancers." Bumi said. He continued, "Remember when we were young? Well, when I was young? We were in that dance contest, and you cheated your way to first place?"

Aang chortled and said, "I didn't cheat. The rules said you couldn't use any earthbending to help with your dancing. They didn't say anything about airbending."

Bumi laughed with several snorts. As his laughter came to an end, his face gradually began to look solemn, almost sad. He finally said, "I miss that silly kid."

"What do you mean? I'm still here."

"You are. But after you returned from your disappearance, you were different. Like, a piece of you had been taken away. And every time I've met you since then, a bigger and bigger piece was missing. There's not a whole left of the Aang I knew as a kid. I know this world has not been a good place the last hundred years, I just hope it doesn't take the last piece that's left."

Bumi got up and offered his hand to help Aang up. "You sure you don't want to come?"

Bumi's wild eyes looked calmer than usual; they exuded a rare, gentle warmth. Aang looked up at his old friend as he thought about what he said.

"Okay, you talked me into it."

. . .

The celebration was taking place outside, in one of the few places in the city that were clear of structures. During the day it was used as a type of town plaza, but now it was packed with people. Several large bonfires were lit all around with crowds of people standing around them, talking and laughing while music filled the air. Tables with food and drink were well lit with lanterns, while overhead, lights were strung up.

"There you are!" Katara called out as she saw Aang approach with Bumi. "Where were you? You're practically the guest of honor!"

Aang's heart skipped a beat when he saw Katara. She had changed into the green Earth Kingdom kimono she wore for the Earth King's party some months ago, back in Ba Sing Se. This time she had no makeup and her hair was down, but Aang thought she still looked beautiful.

"I knew it was a good idea to save this outfit," Katara continued, "How do I look?"

Aang smiled and tried not to blush. "You look really beautiful."

Katara responded with a big smile. She was about to say something but was interrupted by Sokka yelling.

"No, don't drink that!" Sokka yelled at a nearby man who was preparing drinks and slapped a desert cactus out of his hand. Sokka immediately yelled in pain from the cactus needles pricking his hand. "Ow!"

Sokka shook his hand to dismiss the pain and continued yelling at the man. "These desert cactuses will turn your brain into mush! What are you doing?!"

"Don't tell me you've drunk the juice from them without mixing it first? For Yangchen's sake, are you an idiot?"

"Come again?" Sokka responded, confused.

"Everyone knows these desert cactuses are hallucinogenic! But, if you mix them with water and a bit of citrus juice, it cancels out the effect and they become very refreshing," The man proceeded to do as he described, mixed a drink, and handed it to Sokka.

"Nuh-uh, no way. Not gonna try it," Sokka said and crossed his arms.

"Here, gimme that," Toph said, snatched it from the man, and drank it on one gulp. She smacked her lips a few times, "Hmm… yup, very refreshing, and I don't feel a thing." She sounded disappointed.

The celebration continued for a while, although Aang mostly kept to himself, sitting at a table and sipping the desert cactus fruit drink that the man prepared for the partygoers. The band was now playing more festive music, and many people were dancing. Aang had hoped that maybe the party would rub off on him and that he'd feel better but found that the longer it went on, the more isolated and bored he became. Occasionally, people would come to talk to him, wanting to meet "The Avatar" for themselves. But Aang kept most conversations short, just wanting to go back to being left alone. For the first time in his life, he realized he was at a party that he looked forward to ending.

He looked down at his cup and swirled the liquid around a bit in an attempt to distract himself. He noticed someone had approached him and he looked up and saw Katara standing in front of him. She held out her hand.

"Want to dance?" She asked.

A million conflicting thoughts ran through Aang's head which culminated in a simple "Yes."

Aang got up and Katara grabbed his hand. She pulled him in the direction of the dance floor.

"So, I gotta confess something. That night we had the dance party… that was the first time I really danced. I'm not sure what to do." She said and gave Aang a shy smile.

"That was your first time?" Aang said, "You were incredible, though."

Katara blushed and smiled in response. They were now on the dance floor, surrounded by people. Aang said, "The important thing is, don't think too much. Just let the music move you."

The two of them began moving with the music. Slowly at first, but quickly building up. They stepped forward and back and side to side as they let the music wear away at their inhibitions. Katara felt Aang take her hand and before she knew it, she had been swung around and dipped, only to be pulled up with an airbender assisted swirl of air that set the two spinning off the ground for a few just a few seconds that felt like hours.

Everyone stopped and watched as they spun in the air. Aang and Katara laughed as the dizziness hit them when their feet touched the ground again, bringing their spin to a sliding stop. They momentarily lost balance but kept each other from falling.

With big smiles on their faces, they both stared at each other's eyes as they took a moment to catch their breaths. Just like that, Aang felt happy and like himself again. And as he looked at her, he felt overwhelmed by a surge of love for her. It was at that moment he finally made a decision: during their trip together, he was going to confess his feelings for her.