1x05

Owen should've known that bringing TK to his chemo with him was a mistake.

He was glad the kid knew and all.

And he was more than thankful for the support.

But he was more of a nervous wreck that Owen ever was.

And it showed.

"TK!" The leg bouncing was a habit he got from him, but it didn't make it any less annoying.

"You need something?" Oh God he was such a mother hen. "I got peppermint oil, or uh, saltines, ginger chews, headphones…"

"You're freaking out." He really didn't need to be either.

Yeah, it was scary.

Yeah, it was a bit much.

But everything was fine.

"I'm not freaking out." If Owen knew one look on his son, it was his freak out face.

And he knew that only because it was the same freak out face his mother used to get whenever he did something stupid and quite possibly extremely dangerous.

TK may have been all Owen, or at least, mostly Owen, but if he got anything from Gwen, it was that face.

"I'm kind of freaking out." He was waving around Owen's $200 headphones like they were nothing and he was about to say something.

But he got it.

This was all new to him, and yeah, it was a little freaky.

"It's okay." It would totally be okay. "I was too the first time."

In fact, he had paced back and forth outside the hospital for twenty minutes before he convinced himself to go inside.

He didn't know how to handle what was about to happen to him.

He guessed that was maybe where TK was right now too.

"Hey." He watched as TK fidgeted nervously as he looked up at him. "Thanks for being with me."

"Of course." He said it like it was the easiest thing in the world for the kid to do, which he knew it wasn't. "I can't believe you've been dealing with everything on your own."

He wasn't, not quite.

But while Judd and Michelle both already knew about the cancer, neither one of them had seen this part.

The ugly part.

The part that stripped away his humanity and made him feel very, very small.

"To juggle it with the job, that's insane." Yeah, yeah he was definitely insane.

"It's been a lot, but…" A lot, yeah, that was an understatement. "Oof."

He saw Wayne and all he wanted to do was disappear.

The man was as nice as they came, but damn did he talk your ear off if you let him.

And believe it or not, Owen was not in the mood to talk.

"You nauseous?" And there was nervous TK again, rearing his ugly head once more.

"I will be when the advice starts." He didn't need advice, not today of all days.

"Captain Strand, good to see ya." And there it was, the booming voice that was undoubtedly going to tell him a thousand and one things about cancer that he didn't want to know.

"How you doing?" But Owen wasn't rude, so instead he extended his hand and shook Wayne's as if they were old buddies catching up.

"All right. Good to see ya." Yeah, he already said that.

"This is TK, my boy." Maybe he could distract him by pointing out the newest member of the chemo room.

"Oh, so you finally came clean." It hadn't exactly been by choice, but yes, yes he had. "Good for you."

He watched as TK stood, waiting for the right time to say something.

"Howdy." Wayne extended his hand to TK this time and shook it like he was meeting a legend. "Wayne Gettinger."

"Hi…" TK seemed so out of sorts and if Owen didn't know any better, he'd think he was a little nervous.

Maybe he could sense the vibe that Owen was giving off.

"You got your pops QB-1 looks." Neither of them would deny that, that's for sure. "Lucky boy."

Yeah, that apple didn't fall too far from the tree, that's for sure.

Owen smiled at TK as he raised an eyebrow, watching as the other man laughed.

He owed him big time for this.

"So TK, you local?" And here it goes… "Or you just coming to visit the old man?"

Who was he calling old?

"We work together." Owen figured it might be safer if he did all the talking.

"Oh you're firefighter too?" TK looked embarrassed and Owen chuckled.

This was going to be good.

"Yes, sir." He shifted in his seat as he gripped the armrest on his chair.

"Boy, the trouble you must get up to, huh?" If only Wayne knew. "Austin, lock up your daughters."

Well, not quite.

Although, Owen had seen plenty of women eyeing TK, and he knew the kid sure loved the attention, no matter who it came from.

"Actually, I play for the other team." Might as well just tell the man everything at this point.

Owen laughed as TK made a face.

At least he didn't seem as uncomfortable now as he had ten minutes ago.

"Oh." Yeah, oh was the most common response to TK's announcement of being gay. "Lock up your sons doesn't sound quite right does it?"

Owen shrugged as he closed his eyes.

"Aw hell, I don't judge." That's what most people said.

Until it came down to it.

Texas sure as hell wasn't like New York in that regard.

"The important thing is, we play when we can." Amen to that one. "Ain't that right Captain?"

Wait, he was talking to him?

Why was he talking to him about this?

He really didn't want to discuss his sex life with this complete stranger.

Especially with his son in the room.

"Cause Lord knows we don't get out on the playing field much." Who was he talking about?

Surely not Owen.

Cause Owen got out on that playing field plenty.

"Uh, speak for yourself Coach. I get on the field plenty." In fact, he had been on the playing field plenty last night, and this morning.

There were many reasons he had stayed with Michelle last night, one being that he was entirely too tired to leave Michelle's after the Uber dropped them off.

Another being that the second her lips had landed on his he had forgotten all about his plans to go home and sleep.

They had shed all clothing while still standing and had then made good use of her kitchen counter.

She had muttered something about them not being used for anything else anyway so why not.

"Oh now, you don't have to puff up for me." He wasn't puffing up, not at all.

His sex life was just fine thank you very much.

"I mean, there's no shame in it." No shame in what?

"I have no idea what you're talking about right now." And he didn't.

In fact, he was really lost.

What was there to be shameful about?

"Wait…" Oh shit, he forgot about TK for a minute. "What are you talking about?"

Maybe this wasn't the best conversation to be having in front of his son.

"Well the treatment that we get here can… well it can… make the 'little soldier' let's say um…" This was not where Owen thought this was going. "Take an extended furlough."

Well not his 'little soldier'!

His 'little soldier' was doing just fine.

In fact, he was better than fine.

TK laughed and Owen snapped his head toward him.

What was so damn funny?

"There's nothing wrong with my little soldier." He didn't know why he felt the need to tell TK that.

In fact, he probably really didn't want to know that.

Especially considering that he was very well aware of who his father was sleeping with.

A topic that they hadn't discussed anymore since that night three weeks ago.

"Perfectly healthy and active." He'd get Michelle to sign something if he needed too. "It's a patriot… and always ready to stand at attention."

That was so not what he wanted to say.

"Yeah, may seem like that now, but…" Oh God, there was a but. "Don't be too shocked if a day comes real soon and it turns out to be a deserter."

Why the hell was TK finding this so damn funny?

"Okay, I'll take those headphones." He didn't want to talk about this anymore.

Nope, he was officially done.

—

"Sooo… that Wayne…" Please don't go there TK, please don't.

"Yeah. He's something." He was hoping for a quiet ride home.

He just wanted to close his eyes and rest.

And then fall into his bed and sleep the day away.

He didn't want to talk about anything.

"So your little soldier huh?" And certainly not about this. "He's doing just fine."

"TK…" This was not the kind of conversation a grown man had with his son.

"Hey Wayne said…" Yes, yes Wayne did say.

"Wayne was wrong." He opened his eyes and turned his head toward the younger man, watching as TK chuckled and shook his head. "Whatever his chemo is doing to him, it's not doing it to me."

"Yet." No, no there was no yet in this.

"Never TK." Especially not with someone like Michelle in his life.

"So you and Michelle?" They were stopped at a red light and TK chanced a look at him. "Things are okay in that department?"

"Better than okay." He smiled and TK made a gagging noise as he turned back to the road.

"I don't need to know." Well he's the one who asked. "I just want you to be happy dad."

"Oh trust me, I'm very happy." And so was his sex life. "The sex is amazing."

"I… I didn't ask…" He figured embarrassing the kid a little was totally called for after the way he laughed at him earlier.

"And it's a pretty regular thing." He could practically hear TK freaking out.

"Oh God, dad, I have to work with her!" Owen laughed as he closed his eyes again and leaned back. "I'm never gonna be able to look at her the same way again."

"Oops." He heard TK sigh as they continued toward the house.

It stayed silent for a few minutes and Owen hoped that that meant that things would stay that way.

"She really makes you happy doesn't she?" Well that question came out of nowhere.

"Yeah son, she does." And that was the damn truth.

Just friends or friends with benefits or whatever the fuck they were, that part was true.

She made him happier than any other woman ever had.

"Good." That sounded pretty definite so he started to let himself dose off some, his mind wandering back to what Wayne had said.

Was it possible that his little soldier wouldn't always work the way he should?

—

But he didn't have to do hours of research like he normally would in order to find out.

Because instead he had met Zoe at the cosmetic store and she had flirted and he had flirted back.

And one thing led to another and the next thing Owen knew they were at his house and she was shedding her clothes.

This was so not where this was supposed to go.

Not that it mattered, because the second they got into the bedroom and the lights were off and it came time for his 'little solider' to make an appearance, he was duller than dull.

No standing at attention, no saluting, nothing.

Zoe had been sweet about it, but he wasn't stupid, he knew it was a turn off.

I mean, of course it was.

So she had left and he had stood in the middle of the living room staring at the front door.

What the fuck did this mean?

So he grabbed his phone and pressed the familiar name and waited.

"It's almost midnight, on my night off, this had better be good." Well she sounded cranky.

"Can I come over?" He had almost just jumped into bed with another woman, maybe this wasn't his brightest idea.

But they weren't dating and that was a fact.

In fact, she had told him in not so definite terms, that they were just "having fun".

So that meant they could see other people?

Right?

"Yeah." And then the line went dead and he was left standing in silence, alone, once again.

"Fucking chemo man." He whispered his words as he grabbed his leather jacket, sliding it back on and grabbing his keys.

Hopefully being with Michelle would make it all better.

—

So he had driven to her house and let himself inside with the key she had left on his desk three days ago.

That didn't seem like they were just having fun, but he wasn't in the mood to argue when he'd found it.

He toed his shoes off and hung his jacket by the door before locking up.

And then he made his way down the hall and into her bedroom, smiling when he heard her let out a huff from the bed.

"I thought you were joking." He could make out the top of her head and one eye from where she was buried amongst the blankets in the middle of the bed.

She looked extremely cozy in there and he kind of felt bad.

"No, not joking." But only a little bit.

He shed his jeans and t-shirt and climbed under the blankets as she slid to one side.

He knew that she was surprised that he was there, but he wasn't about to sleep on the couch when this big bed was here, and she was in it.

"What's wrong?" She whispered her question as she rolled from her stomach to her side, facing him as she let out a yawn. "Are you okay? Is TK alright?"

Damn this woman and her big old heart.

Instantly making sure that he was fine.

Because, yeah, showing up in the middle of the night was kind of random.

"I almost had sex with another woman tonight." Well shit Owen, way to 'ease onto it'.

"Oh?" She raised an eyebrow as she stared back at him, her brows crinkling as she tensed up. "Did you now?"

"It was… stupid." Amongst other things.

"I'm sure." She didn't seem angry, rather, she seemed, annoyed.

Or was that jealousy?

It had been a while since he had witnessed that emotion when it came to him.

"We met at the beauty supply store." Cause that sounded so much better. "She thought I was gay."

"Well normally the only guys in Sephora, are…" She had point, sort of.

"I wasn't in Sephora." But that wasn't the point. "That's beside the point… we… she flirted and I flirted back and then one thing led to another and…"

"And you almost had sex with another woman?" The look on Michelle's face told him he probably should have left that part out.

"Almost." He had to tell her the truth right?

"So why didn't you have sex with her then?" Well he certainly didn't expect that question from her.

"Well… ya see…" He swallowed and chewed on his lip for a minute as he tried to figure out how to properly word what was going on in his mind right now. "We um…"

"Owen…" Michelle reached out and patted his cheek.

What was he, a puppy?

"I couldn't get it up okay?!" He hadn't meant to get so worked up about it and respond like that, but he wasn't handling this as well as he thought.

Was Wayne right?

Had he reached the point where sex was no longer going to be able to be his favorite past time?

"Oh…" He could tell she was trying not to laugh and he glared back at her. "Oh?"

And then it must have hit her what that really meant.

"Wayne said it would happen." Ugh. "But we had just had sex last night, and this morning, and nothing happened and…"

He didn't get to finish his sentence because the next thing he knew Michelle was slamming her lips against his and tangling her fingers in his hair.

"Did you…?" He tried to push her away but she rolled them over, straddling his waist as she leaned down and kissed him passionately. "Did you not hear what I just said?"

Michelle nipped at his bottom lip, a sign that she wanted him to stop talking, and so he shut up.

They laid there for a good fifteen minutes, their lips dancing over each other's as his hands ran up and down her back and her fingers made a mess of his hair.

"I heard you loud and clear." She whispered after a few minutes, her forehead falling to rest on his as she stared at him softly. "But it doesn't appear to be something I need to be concerned about."

Her smirk told him everything he needed to know.

And then the next thing he knew she was reaching down between them, her hand sliding inside his boxers as she wrapped her fingers around his erection.

His erection that he hadn't been able to get earlier.

But one that certainly didn't have a problem showing up now.

"Perhaps you were just trying to get it up for the wrong girl." She smirked at him as she moved her hand up and down and he moaned.

"Evil." He hissed out, his hands gripping her hips as he flipped them over quickly, his body hovering above hers as he pushed her underwear down.

He was incredibly thankful that she rarely slept with pants on.

"Maybe, but it's worth it." She leaned up and kissed him as she shoved his boxers down, smiling against his lips when he traced a finger over her core.

"Totally worth it." He whispered before sliding into her with ease.

So maybe the fact that he couldn't get it up with Zoe earlier wasn't such a bad thing after all.

—

The next two days hadn't been too bad, he and Michelle had chosen to spend their 48 hours off together, in bed.

And without one lack of performance from his 'little soldier' at that.

Maybe he just needed to be with the right person.

Maybe this was his body's way of telling him that he and Michelle belonged together.

Not that his heart hadn't figured that one already.

His brain on the other hand, well it was still in denial.

But the second that he was called to the scene of an accident and it was made it clear that Michelle was part of said accident, well his heart had decided to tell his brain to fuck itself.

Because in that instant, all he cared about was making sure she was okay.

"Blake and her team are stuck in there," No, no, not Michelle. "There's some toxic fumes, we couldn't get them out. He almost passed out. I don't know why."

Owen could see the instant but fleeting look of fear across Judd's face.

He could sense it in Carlos' voice too.

That was their friend in there and they were scared.

Not that they would ever show it.

Him on the other hand, yeah, he would probably show it.

"Captain Blake?" Oh yeah, he was showing it.

"Yeah, she's in there with her team and a patient they were trying to transport." He could tell that Judd was reading him like a book.

And right now, every word on Owen's page was screaming PANIC.

"PD got here first but they couldn't get close enough to pull anybody out 'cause they got hit with toxic fumes and it knocked them off their feet." He knew that he was looking at Judd like he had six heads, but damn was nothing about what he was saying making sense.

Maybe that was because he could only half hear him.

Maybe that was because his only focus right now was on the woman trapped inside that ambulance who had stolen his goddamn heart.

"All right, hazmat protocols everybody." That was the only way in and he knew it.

He rattled off instructions as he tried to move as fast as possible to grab his own gear.

He had to get to her and fast.

And the second he saw that she was still breathing his heart had done a little hiccup, reminding him of just how human he was.

She was okay, sort of.

"It is." The sound of her voice responding to Marjan's comment made him snap his head in her direction.

"All right everyone, let's secure this patient and get her out of there." Keep it cool Owen, keep it cool.

"Captain…" He could hear the distress in her voice and he was starting to panic again. "I'd appreciate if you start with my team first."

Of course she would.

Always the damn hero that stubborn woman.

"He won't mind. He's dead." Well okay then.

"Okay." He nodded his head as the others worked to get Nancy and Tim to safety.

And he made his way toward her.

She was pale, and her breathing was uneven, but it was hard to tell if that was from the panic of what had just happened, or because she was feeling the effects whatever had killed her patient.

"You okay?" He wanted to take the damn mask off and try to offer her some comfort, but he knew better.

"Just, get me out of here." She shook her head as she closed her eyes and he nodded, reaching out to safely move her into a standing position.

She let out a moan and a wince and he instantly did a visual check to make sure nothing was broken.

"Come on." He gently lead her outside and toward the waiting ambulances on the next block over. "Let's get you looked at."

"Tim? Nancy?" She was looking around for them and he felt her tense up when she realized they were nowhere to be seen.

"They're already on their way to the hospital." Carlos' voice was a welcome one and he was thankful for someone else being around.

Otherwise he was liable to pull her into his arms and tell her to never be so damn brave again.

"Thank God." She whispered as they helped her onto a gurney.

Carlos squeezed her hand before offering her a smile and Owen simply nodded his head.

He knew that Carlos knew they were sleeping together.

Hell, Carlos probably knew everything about him at this point.

But he wasn't sure how she'd feel about a public display of affection, so he kept it to himself.

"We're gonna get her out of here." The paramedic who took her offered them both a smile before wheeling the bed away.

And then he was just left standing there with his kind of girlfriend's best-friend and he felt a little awkward.

"She'll be fine Captain." She had better be.

"Yeah. I know." He watched as the ambulance pulled off, his hands reaching up to pull the damn helmet off his head.

"She's the strongest woman I know." He didn't doubt that for a second.

"That she is." He didn't know if he was supposed to open up to Carlos, it's not like they really knew each other.

And again, he wasn't certain how much Michelle would want him to say.

She figured she told Carlos what she wanted him to know.

He wasn't sure what exactly that would be at this point though.

"I'll check on her in an hour after my shift ends." Carlos offered him a smile and Owen nodded.

"Thanks." And then he was turning on his heel and heading back toward the scene.

His heart was tugging in a million different directions he didn't like it one bit.