Kamala, Kate and Natasha were in the hangar of the Helicarrier, cleaning the Quinjet. After their unauthorised mission to Lataveria, which had potentially put the whole team at risk, they understood that there had to be some kind of reckoning for them. It wasn't as though the Avengers were a particularly formal organisation with an HR department or anything, but they also understood that in the event a member did something that reflected badly on the group or that could potentially put them in danger, then there had to be some kind of corrective action for that.
The whole thing had been very civil all things considered. The fact that their mission was to save Sable and her allies was an entirely understandable motive, and all of them had gone rogue at one time or another to do the right thing. Doing the wrong thing for the right reasons was sadly something that was a common paradox of their existence, and so after much discussion, Cap, Thor, Tony and Bruce had decided on their punishment. After the Quinjet was repaired, they were to clean it inside and out. All things considered, since they had risked an International Incident and even military retaliation from a foreign Government, as far as punishments went, they knew they'd gotten off pretty lightly.
It didn't mean it didn't suck a little though. The Quinjet normally was cleaned and maintained by JARVIS' many systems, and it didn't take long for them to realise exactly how big the Quinjet really was. Kamala groaned as she scrubbed down one of the surfaces with a sponge.
"You think this is bad? One time Clint took my bow." Kate told her. "He said he'd only give it back to me if I could pull off the 'Robin Hood shot'. It took me six months to finally land that shot."
"You mean the one where you split an arrow?" Kamala asked her. Kate just nodded. "But…didn't the Mythbusters prove that was impossible?"
"Turns out, not so much." Kate told her. "Man, it sucked having to practice with a different bow. Don't get me wrong, I can use other bows, but that one is just…it's like a part of me, you know? I know the weight, the balance, the torsion…it felt like getting a limb back when he finally gave it back to me."
"Well, the good news is, we're nearly done here for the day." Nat sighed as she tied up a trash bag. "Only twenty more days to go."
"I swear, I don't know how even though my skin is basically play dough, I still get wrinkled fingers." Kamala commented, looking at her hands. Just then, they all looked around, curious as they heard something from the room nearby. There were a couple of loud voices.
"Is that Tony and Thor?" Kate asked.
"I think it is." Kamala agreed. They couldn't exactly hear what they were saying, but the voices were raised, at least loud enough that they could hear them in the hangar. Nat, Kate and Kamala headed through to the Commissary, finding Bruce sitting, reading a book, trying to ignore them, while Steve watched Tony and Thor standing a few feet away from each other, seemingly yelling at each other.
"I received a commendation,
On the President's Log,
Your little brother turned you,
Into a frog!"
Tony was staring straight at Thor as he spat out the insult. Nat, Kate and Kamala just stared at them both. It wasn't unknown for there to be arguments on the ship, it was kind of just a fact of life, but they didn't know what could have sparked the fight.
"When I was victorious, I changed right back,
You're still what you always were, a preening show dog!"
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, time out, time out!" Kamala called out, getting between them. "Dudes, what's going on here? What are you fighting about?"
"Fighting?" Tony asked, chuckling a little, before looking to Thor. "Dude, she thought we were fighting."
Thor just roared with laughter. The three women just kind of looked at each other, not really understanding what the joke was. Thor finally turned to them.
"What you were witnessing is the art of Flyting." Thor explained to them.
"Flyting?" Kamala asked him. "What's that?"
"It was a very popular pastime back in my homeland." Thor told them. "It is a contest of wits, humour and wordplay. The objective is to insult your opponent with an improvised rhyme."
"What?" Kate asked him.
"Think of it as rap battling…without the music." Tony tried to explain. "Thor introduced us to it a while back, when he was feeling nostalgic for the old hometown. It turns out it's pretty fun."
"So, you guys actually hurl insults at each other…for fun?" Kamala asked.
"Yeah." Tony said rather abruptly. "What do you say, would you guys like to give it a shot?"
"Oh no, I don't think I could." Kamala said, shying away from them. She was getting more used to being around the heroes she had idolised all her life, but she still was largely in awe of them. She couldn't bring herself to even think of insulting them, even if they were inviting her to do so.
"No, but it does sound like something that'd be fun to watch though." Kate said, finding herself a spot on a couch. Nat thought about it for a moment.
"You know what? You're on!" She said, stepping up. Tony just clapped her.
"Great, we've got another willing participant, it looks like you finally get an opponent, Steve!" Tony said as Steve got up, coming onto the floor to face her. "Banner is too uptight for this kind of thing; he just sits there with his nose in that book pretending not to notice us."
"Alright, Nat, since you're the newcomer, Steve can go first." Tony said, patting Cap on the shoulder. Steve held his chin for a moment, thinking of how to lead off, before he considered his first lines.
"I'm an Iconic Avenger,
The one who set the bar,
It's difficult for people to insult you,
No knows who you are!
I'm the real deal,
The face of a Nation,
You're the one we call,
When we need a vacation."
Nat smirked a little, nodding in appreciation of his opening barbs. She thought about her response.
"At least I'm here on merit,
My skills are legit,
You took the easy road,
You're a red, white and blue hypocrite!
They might call you an icon,
I say you're a loser,
The only reason you're on the team,
Is you're an Olympic class Juicer!"
There was some sucking of teeth at that line. Cap just chuckled as he prepared a response.
"OK, I was being a Gentleman,
I was gonna let this slide,
But at least I didn't spend half my life,
Fighting for the wrong damn side!
I came back from a dozen deferments,
Just to fight the good fight,
You only came here,
After 20/20 hindsight."
There were a few reactions from that line. It was pretty brutal for Steve to go there. But they all knew they were still just playing around. Nat stepped up for one last turn.
"Yes, I defected,
I'm no longer a flunky,
At least I was never,
A flag-wrapped 'roid monkey!
But I've got to put to bed,
This tired old geezer,
Now I'm done cooking you,
I'll put you back in the freezer!"
The others applauded as she finished off her line. Steve just held up his hands.
"OK, there's no need to even judge, I'm giving that to Nat." He said with a wry smile on his face. "Wow, you came out with some brutal lines!"
"You didn't pull too many punches yourself there, Cap." Nat complimented him.
"OK, Thor, you mind if I school her?" Tony asked. Thor just gestured for him to continue. Tony stepped up before her, folding his arms.
"Your profile on this team,
Is at best infinitesimal,
Your stealth suit's quite apt,
Ask about the Avengers, you're invisible,
My worst movie,
Bankrolled the studio well,
Your movie spent a decade,
In developmental Hell."
Nat had to try hard to keep a straight face with that line. She brushed a hand through her hair as she thought about an answer.
"You're right, I don't make a show of myself,
At least I don't hide,
You need six inches of armour,
Just to go outside!
I infiltrated Monica's army,
Working hard to nail her,
You spent five years,
Sulking in your trailer!"
Tony reeled a little, and looked like he was about to laugh at that line. Still, he straightened himself out, and prepared to rally back.
"I bring an arsenal to the fight,
Missiles and lasers,
Your weapon of choice,
Is a glorified Taser.
My power is immense,
It's literally all in my heart,
Your Widow's bite,
Is on sale at Walmart."
Natasha couldn't keep a straight face with that line and just doubled over laughing.
"Sorry, sorry, it wasn't my best…"
"No, no it was good enough, there's no way I can concentrate after that line!" Nat laughed. "I'm tapping out, you win."
Tony threw up his hands and started parading around, while they gathered around.
"Alright, let's get some new matches going, are you two sure you don't want in on this?" Tony asked. Kate and Kamala both just shook their heads. "Alright, well, Thor, I guess we could go again…"
They all turned as they heard a snap, seeing that Bruce had slammed his book shut. He took off his glasses and stood up.
"I'm trying to concentrate,
Your rhyming's just sad,
You're giving me a headache,
You wouldn't like me when I'm mad!
I was trying to ignore,
Your childish game,
But it looks like the only way to deal with you,
Is put you to shame!"
He approached Thor, looking into his face.
"Your dad kicked you out,
For being an epic fail,
Your only tool's a hammer,
You just never found the nail.
You keep falling for your brother's tricks,
He keeps giving you grief,
You never learned not to trust him,
He's literally the God of Mischief!"
He rounded on Tony next.
"You talk about how brilliant you are,
But your intellect is so-so,
You made all those fancy weapons,
But still managed to lose all your dough!
You posed on magazines,
With your fancy suits and hair,
I achieved as much as you,
But I didn't need dad's name to get me there!"
He looked to Steve next.
"I expected better from you,
Than to play their games,
You were a Howling Commando,
But people remember THEIR real names!
Now you're an Icon,
Because of someone else's shield,
But matching wits with me?
You'd best just yield!"
He then started to head towards the door, before stopping and turning back and smiling.
"I don't need Big Green to beat you,
With my words I come gunning,
That's how I was Harvard's poetry slam champion,
Seven years running!
But now I'm bored,
So this contest has to stop,
And I believe this is what you call,
A mic…drop!"
He walked out of the room while all of the others just stared after him in amazement. Eventually Tony managed to say something.
"Did…did Banner just totally roast all of us?" Tony asked. Kamala let out a squeal.
"That was…AWESOME!" She squeaked. The others all just nodded in agreement, before laughing and turning to the kitchen.
"Alright, after that, I know could use something good." Tony stated. "I call pizza, anyone else?"