Happy October!

It's been a while since I've uploaded, but here I am with a brand new chapter, with a TON more character developments. I'm too excited to talk so read on and see for yourselves!

The Thought

Aris

I wait outside the council chamber, where Kwintessa is currently discussing the war with the Jedi. I look around nervously, as the realization that I'm probably one of the first non-Jedi to enter the temple hit me a while ago. And at that, probably one of the first clones that has. If not the first. On my way in, and for every step I've taken inside, I haven't seen any. But I've seen plenty of Jedi, all of whom look at me with very different expressions. Some look at me kindly, but not many. Most seem suspicious, and some of the younger ones are almost fearful. The entire way to the council chamber, Kwintessa held her head high and kept her expression darkened, looking only forward and not acknowledging anyone. And looking around myself, I finally realized her reasoning behind why she always talks about the Jedi with a sour taste in her mouth.

I was taught on Kamino that the Jedi where the righteous peacekeepers of the galaxy. And after meeting Kwintessa, I figured that was true. She was kind enough, and while I had my initial suspicions, they were quickly alleviated. But now, my old suspicions are resurfacing. Because why? Why would the Jedi react in such a way? A simple salute would be nice, maybe even a nod. But not the glares, turning the opposite direction or making an abrupt turn to a different hallway, stopping in their tracks and staring as I walk by, or other behaviors. But that's not even the worst part. For me, as a soldier, I can handle those looks. They are upsetting, and I certainly don't think the same way about the Jedi as I once did, but the worst of it is different. The worst of it is that most of the looks thrown were directed not to me, but to my General.

As Kwintessa entered the building, her saber hilts hanging from her weathered belt, there were all sorts of expressions on her fellow Jedi's faces. However, I didn't need to be a Jedi to identify their emotions. Most of their faces clearly read, Oh, so you're not dead yet? And others told me that they were certainly wishing that she was, which made me more angry. And now, I pace the floor outside the chamber, wishing more and more that we could leave and go back to the battlefield.

It's not too many moments later when Kwintessa exits the chamber, looking hot and bothered. I can tell that the council was giving her as much crap as the others. I study her a moment, debating what to say and when to say it. She starts for me though, with a simple, concise thought that summarizes exactly how I feel.

"Let's go back to the ship."

As we head down the hall, I walk a little pace behind her, and I feel myself smile despite our situation. The two of us are different in a lot of ways, but sometimes a similarity comes up that forces out a positive reaction.

We make the ship fairly fast, and on the whole way there Kwintessa just hangs onto the rail of the gunship. She looks beat like I've never seen anyone be before, and she walks with a tired sort of movement after we leave the Jedi Temple. As we walk down the ramps to get to the gunship, she slumps over with her head down and her neck bent over; a position Heilian would say is bad for your posture. In fact, as we walk to the bridge, he passes us, and comments on the fact.

"Everything alright General?"

"I'm fine," she sighs, trying to look as positive as possible.

"Stand straighter; it's not good for your health to slouch," he says matter-of-factly. Then, after he does, he looks as though he wants to take his words back, realizing that this isn't the best way to talk to your general.

However, Kwintessa just smirks; the best reaction I've seen out of her all day. "Thanks for the pro tip, Heilian." She puts a hand on his shoulder and gives him a wink before continuing down the hall. I follow her, shrugging when Heilian raises an eyebrow at me.

Fayrin isn't present when reach the bridge, but the holotable is on so she must be somewhere nearby. Kwintessa ignores it, however, and she walks straight back to the table behind it and collapses in a chair with her head on the top. For I moment, I just study her; her usually braided hair is hanging loose around her shoulders, veiling her head from view. She breathes slowly but steadily, and I can tell that something's up. So I take the seat next to her, and after a moment of my hand hovering in the air, I finally place it softly on her shoulder.

"What's wrong, Kwintessa?" I ask. I was about to call her "General", but in this situation I think she need a friend and not her soldier.

She sighs heavily, raising her head to look at me. "I'm just… just emotionally exhausted. Which is making me physically exhausted. I'm so done with people." However, to contradict her point, she leans back and buries her head on my shoulder, ignoring the army and relaxing her muscles.

My initial response is a warm surge of blood through my body to my face, followed by my heart rate speeding up. She's never done this before; nor would I assume her to. I don't know what it means. I've seen only a couple people do this before on Coruscant, and it was usually a gesture of love. Does that mean she loves me? I don't think so. But when I do process that thought, it sends another spike through my heart, and unsure of what to do in response to her action, I just tense up, debating my possible responses. In the end, I decide to place an arm around her shoulder, pulling her in slightly closer.

We wait in this position for a moment before she speaks. "Thank you Aris."

"What for?"

"For being a friend. I've never been very good at friends."

I smile, even though she can't see it. "You're welcome. Thank you, too."

She looks up at me, taking her head off my shoulder. "What for?"

"For understanding the clones. For being nice to us," I tell her. This time, I smile so she can see. She smiles back.

Suddenly, the doors open and in walks Fayrin. For a split second, Kwintessa and I don't register what's going on, until she smirks and puts her hands on her hips. "Am I interrupting something?"

We both simultaneously jump up, knocking over our chairs and resulting in her tripping and falling against me, her hands on my chestplate and mine going to catch her. "N-no!" we both say at once. Then, we realize our new position and we separate; Kwintessa regaining her balance and the two of us righting our chairs. "No, you're fine," she tells Fayrin. I nod in agreement, throwing in a stand at attention to prove the point. Fayrin gives us one more long look before satisfying herself with a sigh and an eye-roll, then she nods towards the holotable.

"Alright then, c'mon, we have battle to talk here," she says. I glance at Kwintessa for a moment to place her reaction, but she's already looking at me so then I duck my head, and then we're looking at each other again and I start to nervously laugh.

"G-go ahead," I tell her motioning for her to walk first. She stammers a thanks and then nods, walking forward and leaving me to follow her.

We stand around the holotable with Fayrin crossing her arms and giving Kwintessa a hard look. "So how bad was it?" she asks. Other than me and Heilian and maybe a couple of the only Jedi masters Kwintessa likes, she's the only one who knows about Kwintessa's Jedi trouble.

"Awful," she responds, her voice edgy. "They still hate me, or at least distrust me, and they don't want me to do anything they can't immediately control or have an input with. They only gave me a few minor operation choices before I yelled at them and told them to grow up and give me something I could deal with, and I'm tired of trying to be nice to them. I just can't keep lying and being polite and pretending that we're friends because we're not."

The air hangs in a deafening silence, with no beeping or moving to break the pressure. Fayrin studies the General for a moment, then nods. "We don't have to be friends with them; we just have to win the war for them. The three of us; we're the best people in the army. You're the best General, and Aris is the best commander. I'd like to think I'm the best Admiral," she smirks. "The three of us, we can make it if we're together. Don't let them get you down."

I have to say it for Fayrin; initially, I wasn't so sure about her, but as time's passed she has proven to be one of the best motivators and very good at keeping everyone in good spirits. She's not cheap about it though; it's more of a 'get up and work and stop being lazy because you're too good for that' sort of way. But she gets the point across well, because of all the words and actions any of us have said or done today, it is her words that make Kwintessa finally smile and straighten her posture, raise her head, and resume the confident position I've grown to trust.

"You're right," she says. "Thank you."

Fayrin looks at me and smiles, and I nod my approval. "Okay, so what was the war report?" she continues.

Kwintessa gives us a brief summary. There have been major battles on many planets, including the location of Christophsis. Alliances have been made with shady figures, most notable the Hutt Clan in order to take down the Separatist forces. Additionally, the planet of Antar 4 that we helped evacuate has been completely taken over, but the Gotal on Atzerri are thus far fine and thriving.

"Our next move is to launch a Republic attack of the planet Uquine," says Kwintessa. "It'll be instrumental to the war's success."

"Uquine, eh?" I've heard of the planet. A Colonies world that is relatively mundane, and doesn't like to see too much action. "Why does the Republic need that planet?"

"We don't need to capture it, we just need to invade it," she informs. "There's a Separatists cybercenter there that houses battle strategies and other intel; a Republic spy infiltrated it and managed to get a base location for us to get to. But we'll need to be careful. We need to get the information without being noticed, but in the end it might be profitable to destroy the station."

"Do the Jedi want you to destroy the station?" asks Fayrin.

"Don't know, don't care," she responds.

Fayrin chuckles. "Alright, I'll alert the pilots. It's gonna be a short trip, but you might as well get some rest while you can. Any more battle details?"

"We can work out the minutia when we get there," says Kwintessa. Fayrin nods and walks away. The General nods at me and then leaves for her chamber, and I follow her out. When we reach the hall, I find myself wanting to say something to her, something to tell her that I care about her troubles. I want to tell her that I can help her, but I don't know the words to say. They catch in my mouth and make me sweat, and with all the armor on I start to get very hot. I open and close my mouth several times, trying to figure out how to grab her attention. Eventually, I just settle for her name.

"Kwintessa?" I manage, a little more gruff than I wanted.

She stops in her tracks and whips around, seemingly sensing the accidental harshness of my voice. "What?" she says, almost in judgment.

I struggle for the words, and in the back of my head is a voice saying "say it! Say it!"

"If you ever need a shoulder, mine is free," I breathe, my voice (thankfully) kinder and soft.

I take a deep breath in, waiting for her reaction. As she waits and stares at me for a moment, a dozen questions run through my head. Did I overstep my bounds? Was that the best thing to say in this situation? Was that even an appropriate thing to say to my General? Was it an appropriate thing to say to a friend? If it wasn't will I be punished?

She takes a few steps forward, her expression unreadable. At first, I think she might slap me, or maybe, if she didn't mind the comment, she might simply smile or salute. But she does something different, something that surprises me. She wraps her arms around my neck and hugs me.

"Thank you for the support Aris," she says into my shoulder.

My heart rate spikes and I feel my mouth forced into a smile as I return the embrace. "Any time."

She loosens her grip and steps back, giving me a final smile before walking down the hall to her chamber. I watch her as she gets smaller and disappears behind a corner. I stand there for a moment, in a bit of a mental stupor. When I finally get my head together, I register what happened. She hugged me.

I've never gotten a hug from anyone before. We had no physical contact on Kamino, save a handshake and maybe the "bro hug" if we won an assignment. But never a real embrace; where you can feel each other's heartbeat and hear each other breathe. Never one where you feel close to another person, when you feel accepted and wanted. I've never had another person to feel close to, not even my other squad members. Sure, I regard them as brothers, but this is different. I don't know how exactly. I can't tell what Kwintessa thinks about me. Does she like me? Like, in that way? I quickly rule out the thought. She's a Jedi; she has more important things to handle. And plus, attachments are forbidden by the order, not that she would care. But even though she doesn't, I don't think she would love me in that way. I think she just regards me as a simple friend, something she's never had. Maybe she's just like me. Maybe she hasn't gotten to hug anyone in her life either, and she wanted to have a moment to feel close to another person. It doesn't have to be a romantic gesture, right? It can just be a sign of trust. Between friends. No, I don't think she likes me. She just trusts me. Which she should; I'm her Commander.

I shake my head and walk through a side hallway that I know leads to the hangar bay. I should oversee some of the battle prep. I arrive in good time, and while Captain Match has handled most the work thus far, he's grateful for the assistance. I get through about half the assignments we've laid out before a new though starts to nag at me; first in the back of my head, then interrupting my focus, and finally worming it's way to the front of my mind.

Do I like Kwintessa? Immediately, my mind says a firm and solid no. I don't like her. But then why is my heart warming and beating slightly faster at the thought? It starts to threaten to introduce a new opinion, but I close the blast door on it and tell it to shut up. I don't love her. It's the same as her with me: I just trust her. And why shouldn't I? She's my general. She's my friend. More than that; she's my best friend. But that's it, right? We behave like perfectly normal friends. And I would never be romantically interested in anyone. My allegiance is to the Republic, not to any one person. It always will be. Same as Kwintessa; she might not care about attachments, but she wouldn't compromise her service to the Grand Army, or to the Jedi, no matter how much she disagrees with them. I don't like her. She just a friend. And that's fine, right? I'm not breaking any by-laws. We aren't. We're allowed to be friends. I'm sure plenty of other generals are friends with their clone commanders. We're probably not the first, and I doubt we'll be the last. It's a normal casualty of war. You make friends with the people you protect and care about. And I care about her in a perfectly formal way, of course. She's a good general. And a good Jedi. The galaxy would be a lot darker if she was gone. It's my job to keep her alive when she can't do it for herself. Which, granted, isn't that often, but still; I'm here if I'm needed. And that's all.

Then why is something still nagging at me? It's like the handle of a rifle digging into your shoulder blade when it's slung over your back. You can readjust it whenever you want, but no matter how much you try to move it or avoid it, it still digs in. It leaves a mark once you reach your destination and take it off. Something about my equation is not adding up. There's still something I'm not admitting. And the feeling's not gonna go away until I admit it. However, just like a long hike with a blaster slung over your arm, I ignore it, waiting to address the feeling until I reach my destination. I don't know what that is yet. A different time, perhaps a different place. I'm not sure. All I know is that I'm willing to deal with whatever nagging thoughts come at me until I'm ready to fully process my feelings. And I'm not feeling anything! At least not specific. I'm not admitting I'm feeling anything. I'm just saying that I'm not gonna admit to myself that I do until I'm sure that I do. Yeah. That's it.

Over the loudspeaker, a pilot announces that we're dropping out of hyperspace. I realize that now would be a good time to head back to the bridge, and so I run there as fast as I can. Somewhere on the way, Heilian materializes next to me, reading a report from a holopad.

"All the medical supplies have been loaded and are ready; I've prepared antidotes for possible diseases that the planet might carry," he says.

"Excellent," I tell him. We reach the bridge doors and enter, and through the large windows I can see Uquine below us. It's a pretty boring planet to be honest: it looks to be more like an agricultural setting than a battlefield. But nonetheless, it must be important. So far, I see no evidence of Separatist soldiers; no ships in the atmosphere, no scuffle on the surface.

"There are no signs of clankers on the surface, which means that the citizens are unaware of the seppies," I say to no one in particular.

"And since the people of Uquine don't like intrusions, this'll mean that they won't be happy with our arrival," says Kwintessa, entering the room and walking over to the holopad at a brisk pace. "We'll have to enter quietly."

"Do you have a plan?" asks Fayrin with a touch of irony.

"Shut up," says Kwintessa, in good spirits of course. "I have a vague idea of what we should do in this situation. I think it'd be safest if we take one squad."

"The other men won't like that," I tell her.

"Oh don't worry; they'll be kept busy. I have a little mission of my own for them," she says with a ghost of a smile.

"And what is that?" asks Fayrin, slightly concerned.

Kwintessa presses a few buttons on the holotable, pulling up an image of what looks like a space station. "There's a separatist cargo station located only half a parsec away. We'll send soldiers there in starfighters to take it out while Raven Squad and I are on the ground."

"This could severely impair Separatist traffic to and from the core worlds," says Fayrin, her face brightening with excitement. "They wouldn't be able to supply their droids as easily if we took out such an easily accessible port. This could work."

It certainly is a good plan; but it comes with a lot of risks. "I think this is a great idea," I tell them. "But I'm concerned about leadership and observation. I can put Captain Match in charge of this, but we don't quite know what we're going into here. I'm sure there are all sorts of air defenses that we don't know how to counteract, and you can bet your lightsabers that reinforcements will come very, very quickly."

"So send a recon; learn what you can as quickly as possible before we leave," suggests Kwintessa. "We can wait here above the planet for a rotation. Gather what intel you need."

"Yes sir," I respond. I leave for the hangar bay to coordinate this operation, which promises to be delicate and certainly dangerous. But, if Kwintessa and Fayrin are right, this'll speed things up very quickly.

OH BOI WE'RE FINALLY HERE

So first I'll cool my jets and start with a chapter commentary:

- So while by this time I'm sure a clone or two have wandered into the Jedi Temple, I figured that there was no way for Aris to know that so I had him think what he did.

- I know I know Aris is a whole SIMP but I don't really care cause it's cute.

- Aaaaaand Kwintessa isn't too much better but again why do Hallmark movies work? Because the whole heckin lot of them are a bunch of simps and it's ridiculously cute so stay with it.

- Alright so I've backed byself into a corner AGAIN by setting up another battle arc. BUT seeing as though it's the Clone Wars I have to have something in there somewhere; we can't just have the romance.

So there you have it, chapter 8. I decided it was high time for Aris to get his act together so you can see it starting, but I'm staying by my original plan so you'll have to wait for chapter 10 for it all to pan out.

Welp that's all I have to say here; hope yall enjoyed and I will see you soon (hopefully) with another chapter!

- DASCKRON