I have another chapter for you
Recap: Willow called Angel and told him what happened to Buffy and asked him to come home. Buffy named her diary Liam, Angel's birth name to help her feel connected to her diary. Angel showed up at Buffy's home and got a very cold reception from Joyce but she allowed him to go and see Buffy.
Thank you for coming back, I hope you are all enjoying this story so far. I am excited to see where we go from here; I am excited to see Buffy's reaction to Angel's return. I have a feeling it's going to be explosive!
A lot of dialogue and emotion in this chapter.
Disclaimer: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and its original characters do not belong to me
Built Up Walls: Chapter 7: Helping Hand
Buffy
My bedroom door knocked, I looked at the clock on my bedside table and saw that it was probably my mom with my dinner. I told her that I wasn't hungry and I didn't want anything, I don't know why she doesn't listen to me.
"Come in." I said and the door opened.
Angel, he was here. He stood in my bedroom doorway with a plate that had my dinner on it... what? Why is he here? Why did my mom let him in? I don't want him to see me like this.
"Hi Buffy," He greeted softly as he came into my bedroom and placed the dinner plate on the dresser.
"What are you doing here?" I demanded.
"I came here to see you," He answered.
"Who called you?" I questioned "It was Willow, wasn't it? She got you to come here," I stated and got off of my bed to stand face to face with him.
"She's worried about you Buffy. Everyone is, they all just want to help," He told me and reached out a hand to touch me but I moved back from him, he looked pained that I rejected his touch.
"I thought leaving the hospital would mean I would finally get some peace and quiet," I scoffed and shook my head at him.
"I know you're angry, you have every-"
"Angry?" I questioned as I cut him off "Angry doesn't even begin to cover what I am feeling right now!" I shouted at him, I could feel the tears threatening to fall but I did my best to try and hold them back.
"Tell me what you're feeling," He said.
"No!" I shouted and pushed him towards my bedroom door "Leave me alone," I told him sternly.
"I'm not going anywhere unless you stake me," He argued and came back into my room, closing the door behind him.
"Leave!" I shouted as loud as I could at him but he didn't budge.
I pushed him but he didn't move, I pushed him again but this time he grabbed hold of my wrists, over my bruises, to stop me pushing him "Let go," I demanded and he did "You need to leave," I stated.
"I told you Buffy. I'm not going anywhere, not until I know that you're ok again. I came here to help you and be there for you," He told me.
"Why?" I questioned "You made it pretty clear where I stand with you. You promised me that I would never see you again, that didn't last long did it," I said angrily "The Slayer got raped so you came to take a look at the freak!" I shouted.
"Of course not! You are not a freak. I came here to check on you and help you. I left Buffy but I never stopped loving you and caring for you, it broke my heart when I heard what had happened to you so I came straight here. Just let me help you, whatever it is you need from me, but please don't push me away now," I explained to her.
"I've had enough of people trying to help me," I stated and pushed him out of the way to open my bedroom door.
"Where are you going?" He asked.
"To get away from here, from all of you. If you won't leave then I'll leave," I told him.
Angel rushed in front of me and pushed my bedroom door closed, he stood between me and the door so I couldn't leave.
"We love you Buffy, all of us, we want to help you." He said calmly.
"No one can help me!" I screamed and the tears finally started to fall.
Angel wrapped his arms around me but I started pushing him away, he didn't move and just held on to me tighter. I cried as I tried to get him off me but it was clear he wasn't going to let me so I stopped and cried into his chest, my legs gave out and fell onto the floor and Angel came down with me. The two of us sat on the floor, he had his arms wrapped around me as I sat in his lap and cried into his chest.
He still smelled the same. It was comforting. I felt like I was safe in Angel's arms but I knew this was temporary because he was going to leave again, I don't know when but he said he came to check on me and help me, he didn't say he had come back for good meaning he has a life somewhere else. How am I supposed to deal with that again on top of all of this? It wasn't fair. He shouldn't have come back here, I know I told Willow I wanted him here but now that he's here... maybe that was a mistake.
I pulled my head away from his chest and saw him looking down at me and I wanted to start crying again but for a different reason. I pulled myself away from him and stood up, he followed and reached out to take my hand and this time I let him. He intertwined our fingers, I closed my eyes and I was transported back a couple of months ago to when we were together and in love and my heart broke.
"Why are you here?" I asked him.
"I told you, I want to be there for you and help you," He replied.
I sat on my bed and he came and sat down next to me.
"And then you're going to leave again and I have to get over you again and get used to you being gone again," I told him.
"I'm not going anywhere right now," He said.
"But you will be... to be honest I still haven't gotten over you being gone the first time. I missed you so much, I wear your chain around my neck just to feel close to you," I showed him the chain and he smiled at it but then his face changed and his eyes focused on my neck... he noticed the bruises.
"Are they from...?" He couldn't even finish.
"Yeah," I answered and moved my hand away from my neck.
"What do you need from me right now?" He questioned.
"I don't know. I didn't think I was going to see you again but here you are in my hour of need," I answered.
"Maybe for now I can just stay here with you," He suggested.
"Ok." I agreed.
I laid down on my bed and got myself comfortable, Angel laid down next to me and took me into his arms, he held me close to him and rested his head on top of mine. This was what I missed most; just being in his arms and having him hold me. I always felt so safe and secure in his arms, it was my favourite place to be. One day I had him and the next he was gone. I think him leaving was going to be worse second time around because we both know its coming but we don't know when.
Angel
Buffy had fallen asleep a couple of hours ago and as much as I wanted to stay by her side and be there when she wakes up I had to go. The sun was going to be coming up soon and I had to find somewhere to stay, I don't know how long I was going to be here but I can't leave now, not when she needs me here. Seeing her has me worried. She is not the same Buffy, there is something about her that has changed and I can't see it ending well for her. She has this angry and fiery streak in her now and I know how it will go... she is going to be looking for revenge very soon but its justice she needs, not revenge.
I grabbed my jacket and shoes, placed a kiss on the top of her head and left her bedroom. I went downstairs to leave and was surprised to see Joyce still up. She was in the living room with a book in her hand; she looked up at me as I appeared in the doorway.
"Buffy is asleep," I stated.
"Sounds like it was quite the reunion up there," She said.
"She's hurting and pushing people away," I replied.
"Not you," She quipped back.
"Oh she was but... I wouldn't let her," I said.
"Are you leaving?" She asked noticing my shoes and jacket in my hands.
"Yeah. I have to try and find somewhere to stay before the sun comes up," I told her.
"I've set up the basement for you," She stood from the sofa and walked towards the basement door, I followed behind her in confusion; I thought she would want me gone as soon as possible. She opened the door and the two of us went down.
Joyce had blacked the windows out with trash bags to stop the light getting in, she had set up a blow up bed with a blanket and a pillow as well some spare clothes she had sitting on top of an old desk.
"Thank you. You didn't have to do this, I know how much you hate me," I said.
"Tonight is the most she has spoken to anyone since it happened. I am thankful that she is talking to someone," She replied.
"I blame myself for this," I stated as I put my jacket on a hook.
"Don't,"
"I broke up with her and that's why she was at The Bronze... if I hadn't broken up with her, she probably would've been on a date with me or I would've been at The Bronze with her. This never would've happened if I had just stayed here," I explained.
"If it wasn't Buffy it would have been some other girl, maybe even Willow. That sick bastard went looking for a victim the other night and he found one," She told me.
"Buffy is many things but a victim isn't one of them," I replied... Buffy was too strong for that.
"Right now, that is exactly what she is,"
"Thank you again for all of this." I said.
Joyce got the hint. She gave me a soft smile and walked up the stairs, closing the door. I heard her walk through the house and up the stairs; I guess she was going to get some sleep as well.
Buffy was a victim. I had never seen her as a victim before now, maybe that was the change in her that I saw. Right now Buffy is not The Slayer, she is the victim. I should never have left, this never would've happened to her if I hadn't left. I would've kept her safe from this and she wouldn't have to deal with this right now... her biggest concern should be school and homework, she has had to grow up way too quickly because of all this Slayer stuff.
For the first time since I met her, I actually feel sorry for her. It is hard to remember that Buffy is only 17 years old, she deals with so much and she is such a strong person and really mature for her age and I never really thought of her as anything different. When I saw her for the first time as The Slayer I knew I wanted to be around her and I was going to help her but I never imagined all of this... I was never supposed to fall in love with her, how crazy was it that The Slayer and a vampire fell in love?
Wow... that was a lot of emotion for one chapter, won't you agree? However, at least Buffy knows that Angel is there for her and it just goes to show how much he loves her. He dropped everything to come back and be there for her.
Thank you for reading, I hope you have enjoyed this chapter. The next one is going to be another emotional one I'm afraid and I think we're going to see Buffy really snap.
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