This is not an official chapter. This is a very vague description of why I haven't been uploading. It's a bit dark at times, so if you don't want to read it, I understand. The point is that I need to take a hiatus right now.
So, I'm not dead. That's something, right? Unfortunately, I'm not back for long.
I just want you all to know that I'm going to be taking a hiatus. I don't know for how long, I'm just not in the right mental state to be writing. Since I last uploaded, it feels like my life has been crumbling apart, starting with the death of my grandfather a few days after I uploaded last, and now… There's just so much shit going on in my life right now that I just can't focus on writing right now. There's much bigger priorities for me now, things that I need to do or help with, and writing... I don't have the motivation I once had for writing. I want to continue writing, but I just can't right now.
I'm hoping my life will return to normal soon, and once it does, I'll be back. I really enjoy writing, and it is something that I want to continue doing, but can't. I've also met some amazing people on this site, and to those of you who I've told about what's going inside of me (you know who you are), thank you for being here for me. Without this site, I don't know what I would've done. I'm not even fully sure if I would be alive right now without the people on this site. So, again, thank you. I cannot thank you enough.
And finally, if anyone decides to PM trying to help, I'll likely decline it. I don't want to put my sorrows on other's shoulders. You all have your own lives you're dealing with, I don't want to add my troubles to your lives. So, if anyone wants to help, feel free to try, it just likely won't work. I haven't even told the person I trust most a lot of the things that's happened, and I trust them with my life and would do anything for them. To that person, thank you. Thank you for staying with me no matter what and helping when I most need you. You know who you are, and I hope that you read this. In case you don't see the messages on discord, I'm not angry or mad. It wasn't your fault. You deserve the world, no matter what you believe.
Hopefully things will be better in 2021 and I can continue writing freely then. Until then, thank you for reading. You have no idea how much it means that people are supporting me, even virtually. Thank you. Seriously. I'm sorry about having to leave on such a depressing note, but I just wanted you all to know why I disappeared and had to give the real reason. I really hope that I will be able to continue writing, and I await that day.
Just so you all know, this is the most open I've ever been, publicly. It's hard for me to do things like this, which is why it took me so long to get to writing this message. But, I wanted to be honest. Let you know a bit of what's going on with me in my personal life. Thank you, all of you, and goodbye. I hope to return soon.