Thanks to everyone who's still reading this story! It makes me happy to see your comments. I hope you're enjoying it so far even if it is a bit dramatic. I promise it get's happier.
It's mid-morning by the time Levi reaches the barracks, and most of his squad is sprawled out on the lawn. Eren, Mikasa, and Armin are clumped together whispering as usual. Connie and Sasha look to be practicing sparing but are really just fooling around. Jean is watching the duo in amusement all while throwing furtive glances over his shoulder towards the young Ackerman woman.
Tch. Teenagers. Bunch of hormone-fueled brats.
"All of you. We're doing ODM drills. Be in your gear at the training field in ten minutes." He barks, passing by them as they all jump to salute.
Levi had already been wearing his harness and is the first to arrive at the grounds. Ducking into the equipment shed to grab his blades and canisters, he happens to be out of sight as his squad shows up. While he doesn't typically care what gossip the kids peddle in their free time, he can't help but listen in when he heard Petra's name.
"So you actually knew her well?" Armin's soft voice can barely be heard. "What is she like?"
"She's probably one of the nicest people I've ever met." Eren says.
"Not to mention attractive." Jean slips in.
"Fuck off, Horse-face!" Eren yells back.
"Hey! I'm just saying."
"It's terrible what she went through. I can't imagine being in her position."
"She's strong. If she was on the original Special Ops Team, she must be." Mikasa says.
"Yeah. Those guys were legends." Connie comments.
"I don't care how strong you are. The idea of being locked away without anything to eat is just too terrible to think about!" Sasha wails.
"Do you ever think about anything other than food?" Jean snarks.
"Sometimes I think about drinks. Rich coffee with cream, ice-cold lemonade…"
"The Captain seems…different since they found her." Mikasa says quietly.
"Yeah. It's weird to see him upset or, you know, act like a person." Connie says.
"He and Petra were close. They spent a lot of time together."
"Do you mean they were close, or were they close?" Levi can practically hear Jean waggle his eyebrows.
"Gods, have some respect would you?" Eren lands a smack on the taller boy's head.
"There's no way! Levi in a relationship? Can you imagine?" Connie laughs.
The group collectively shudders.
"He'd probably stop her in the middle of sex to critic her form."
"He'd make her scrub every inch of her body before touching her."
"He'd shout out the name of his favorite cleaning product when he climaxes."
It was then Levi decides he's heard enough. He steps out of the shed.
"If you brats are finished, I think we'll start with a five kilometer run—with your gear on."
His squad's collective wide eyes and pale faces are enough to improve his mood.
"And while you're running why don't you consider the virtues of minding your own fucking business?"
"Yes, sir!" His squad salutes and follows him to the track exchanging terrified glances.
It's late afternoon by the time they finish training. After he assigns each of his subordinates chores, Levi decides to check-in on Petra, but when he arrives in her room she is no where to be found.
The last time he saw her she'd been fast asleep after taking some medicine to calm down. Now, her bed is neatly made and other than Eren's pink flowers on the bedside table, it's as though she'd never been there at all.
He feels the early tendrils of unease rise within him but refuses to acknowledge such feelings. As he leaves the room intending to locate a nurse, he hears the familiar cadence of Petra's voice from another patient's room down the hall. Relieved she hadn't been relocated without his knowledge, he approaches but stops short of making his presence known.
"They shouldn't have revived me. They should have let me die." A masculine voice speaks with no inflection.
"I know if feels that way," Petra says.
"Every time I close my eyes I see that man. I feel what he did to me. It's like the memory is seared into my brain. I don't want to live like this."
"Neither do I."
Levi's heart lurches as he hears her whisper those words.
"I wish I could erase the last year from my mind like it's been erased from my body. I wish I could forget the pain and the fear and the shame," Petra says, "but I can't. All I can do is try to move forward as best I can."
"I'm not as strong as you."
"You are. You survived. He tried to break you, he treated you like a sub-human thing, he beat you and hurt you, and you're still here. Just like me. You are strong, Harlo. Stronger than the Warden and stronger than you think."
Muffled sobs can be heard from the room as the boy tries to get ahold of himself.
"How can you talk like this? You were there longer than anyone. What he did to you…how can you be so…okay?" He says after a while.
Petra sighs, and Levi knows her shoulders are sagging and face is falling.
"I'm not okay. It's seared into my mind too. I can't sleep without nightmares. I wake up reliving it all. Sometimes I feel like I'll never stop crying and sometimes I feel nothing, like everything I was has been scraped out and left me hollow. I don't know if I'll ever be same."
"I don't want to feel like this…I don't want to be this way…" Harlo cries.
"I know…I know…" Petra shushes and Levi knows she's holding the boy.
Standing in the hall listening to the intimate conversation between traumatized soldiers, Levi feels a mixture of shame for eavesdropping and awe in the young woman's ability to comfort in spite of her own pain. Another feeling crops up however, one which overshadows his other emotions.
Anger - a primal fury at the men who put these soldiers in such a state, who damaged their minds and bodies, who made Petra feel like a "sub-human thing."
Hange told him the prisoners would not be fully interrogated until she had all the recovered soldiers' accounts. Fine. He doesn't want to interrogate them. He wants to hurt them. He wants to make them suffer.
Levi turns on his heel and leaves the medical ward without a word. He stalks across the grounds with his nostrils flaring, blood boiling. Other scouts who see him coming get out of his way. The monster inside has awoken. It had been asleep for far too long.
The dungeons were located underground beneath a solid stone building close to the armory. Two guards stood attention at the entrance. Making a beeline towards them, Levi catches their expressions as they glance at each other in apprehension. He figures they were instructed to not let him enter. Too fucking bad.
Before he can demand entrance though, a booming voice calling his name halts him in his tracks. I know that voice. Turning to the source, Levi sees a tall, lumbering man dashing towards him from the stables. Petra's father had finally arrived.
"Captain Levi!" He calls again and, seeing that he's got the younger man's attention, slows his gait to catch his breath.
"Mr. Ral." Levi forces his bloodlust back to a simmer and reaches out to shake his hand.
It's not an action he typically takes with anyone, but he wants to show respect to Petra's father. To be truthful, a large part of him still feels guilt over the day he first met the man. He's not surprised when he doesn't take his hand.
"Where is my daughter?" Mr. Ral's face is red from exertion. He must have ridden for two days straight to get there. His eyes are swimming with unshed tears.
"Petra is safe and healthy. She's in the medical building. I'll take you to her."
They walk at a fast pace as Petra's father is clearly eager to see his daughter after having thought her dead for the past year. Levi had considered reaching out to him once or twice throughout that time thinking perhaps it would help him find closure if he could apologize for his lack of response that day, but he never did.
That day was another memory he tried not to dwell on. The shock of his squad-mates' deaths and abandonment of their bodies had left him zombified as he re-entered the Walls. He hadn't even registered that it was Petra's father at first who was talking to him, and when he pulled out that letter, well…Levi wanted the ground to swallow him right then. He didn't tell the man his daughter hadn't come back. He'd let him find out on his own.
The two men are silent as they make their journey, both tense for entirely different reasons. Levi can't help but feel small compared to Mr. Ral, who's tall, thick frame towers over his short stature. Petra must take after her mother, Levi muses. He does see features the father and daughter share, though. He has the same amber eyes, rosy cheeks and gingery hair Levi always found so distinctive in Petra.
When they reach the building, Mr. Ral stops abruptly.
"How…how is this even possible?" He asks, bracing himself against the door. Like Levi when he first heard the news, the man doesn't quite believe it.
"The solider who came to tell me said they found her outside the Walls."
"There's only so much I can tell you." Levi answered, his voice measured as he considers his words. "But she is alive and eager to see you."
"But she was dead! They told me she died! Did they lie? Are you all a bunch of liars?"
"Mr. Ral—"
"You!" He jabs his finger against Levi's chest. "You took my daughter away from me. If she hadn't been so infatuated with you…she followed your orders, she followed you beyond the Walls, and she never came back. Now you're telling me she was out there this whole time? She was scared and alone and abandoned!"
His shoulders are heaving now, angry tears trailing his ruddy cheeks.
"What kind of captain are you? You left her body out there, and she was alive! What kind of man… She should never have joined you bloody people. This is no line of work for a girl like her."
Levi says nothing while Mr. Ral berates him. He knows the man is hysterical with grief and confusion, so he can't really blame him for his behavior. The way the man sees it Levi is the face of the Scouts, and the Scouts took his daughter away. Of course he's angry. Of course he wants to lash out.
When he seems to have tired from yelling, Levi hands him a handkerchief.
"Clean yourself up," he says. "Petra shouldn't see you like this."
Mr. Ral sighs, accepting the fabric. He wipes his eyes and blows his nose loudly then tries to hand the soiled item back.
"Keep it." Levi tries very hard to keep the disgust from his face with mild success.
Levi then leads them to the correct ward. As they enter the corridor of patient rooms, a woman steps out into the hall.
"Petra?" Mr. Ral calls out tentatively.
"Papa?" Her eyes grow wide. Joy spreads across her face in the form of a wide smile.
"Papa!" She runs into his arms and he lifts her from the ground as though she weighs no more than a sack of potatoes.
"Oh, Petra. Oh, my darling girl." Her father whimpers into her hair.
Levi, watching the tearful exchange, tries to back away from their emotional reunion so as not to intrude or invoke further ire from her father.
"Petra…how is this possible?" Mr. Ral gently sets his daughter back on the floor, keeping his hands on her shoulders as he takes her in.
"It's…a really long story." She forces a smile this time. "But, I'm okay!"
The man lets out something like a laugh and a sob.
"I thought you were dead. They said you were dead." Mr. Ral turns back to glare at Levi. As he does so, Petra finally notices her Captain awkwardly inching away from them.
"I demand you tell me what's happened to you."
"Maybe we should talk in my room." Petra says gently as she places a guiding hand on her father's arm. Once her father has stepped inside, Petra turns her back on him to look at Levi.
"Captain?" She asks, clearly wondering if he'll join them.
"You should catch up with your father. Just remember what's meant to be confidential." He says, referring to the healing serum.
"Of course, sir."
He turns to go, but is stopped when she places a hand on his arm.
"Will you…" She starts, looking a little bit flustered. A slight blush flowers on her cheeks. "Will you come back later tonight?"
Levi feels the involuntary tug of a smirk and his chest emits a pleasant warmth.
"If you'd like me to."
"I would."
"Then I will."
They hold gazes for a moment longer until Petra realizes she still has her hand on his arm. Her blush darkens as she pulls her hand away.
"I'll see you tonight, Petra."
"Till tonight then, Levi." She smiles and ducks back into her room.
Despite the heavy emotional toll of the day, Levi finds himself fighting the urge to smile as he walks away. For the first time in so, so long he has another evening with Petra to look forward to, and he wouldn't miss it for anything.
Thanks for reading! I appreciate any comments.