Im back. I'm sorry. No excuse. 2020 kicked every one's ass. I know you know it. All I can say is I'm sorry and I'm back. I hope I haven't lost all of you. Happy new year. Let's make this a better one. What better way to apologise then to give you some lemon hmmm? So on with it, I have some recs at the bottom because yes I have been hiding out reading others amazing stories like a coward. Much love xx
Chapter 9 – "Can't keep my hands to myself"
I few months later
I'm not done, I won't be done, will I ever??? Now that's a scary thought.
I slept with Mike that night. After we left the pub, we went back to his place to continue the night, as always Mike roughed up some other dude and got kicked out. It was a convenience thing, technically, we both used each other I guess but with no hard feelings. The next morning, we both got up and everything went back to normal. While class was out for break, I worked full time hours and saved more money, partied it up with Mike and a few of the other boys and life went on. Every now and again there would be "Edward Cullen liked your photo". Nothing more nothing less. I still got the pain in my chest when I thought about him, you know the one, when your read something heart breaking and that lump forms in your throat, but life goes on and the world keeps spinning, such is life.
I heard from Rose via a letter shoved under my dorm's door. She apologised for her vicious words and made excuse after excuse of why she said the things she said. I sent her a message on Facebook accepting her apology, and that was that I guess. Rose went back to like it never happened and I put another arm's length between myself and her. I accepted her apology but it doesn't mean I forgot what she did. I just hate the drama.
She started to hang out with Mike and i, and our Group of friends grew large. Mostly people from high school, rekindling friendships lost while trying to navigate life after high school, even Jake was around, and I even started to get along with him, as a friend, he is still a dick, a pathological liar but it was his flavour of the months problem now, not mine. On the weekends we would all catch up at the local pub/club, it had a band that would play till 12am and then a DJ till 3am.
I was seeing a guy named Alec, it was nothing serious, if anything we were great friends that just happened to have sex on the side. It was the kind of thing I was after, no strings. No confusion.
The days, weeks and months pass, and my life is pretty much set on cruise control. I complete my first year in zoology and go into the winter break with my new apartment ready to roll. I paid my first and last month's rent and the boys helped me move out of my dorm and helped me pick up some second-hand furniture. To celebrate I'm throwing a house-warming party of sorts with few close friends.
Putting the last finishing touches and cleaning the last few things in my place, I start doing some food platters up. Mike, rose, Jake and Alec are showing up at 8pm. Finishing in the kitchen I go to get changed and do my make up. It was decided earlier in the day we would pre drink here and then head to a club afyer, as not to cause to much noise in my new complex. I liked the idea.
After showering and tending to my grooming needs, I hop out and apply some product to my hair. I recently took the plunge I cut my hair off to above my shoulder and bleached it white blonde, and it suits me, if I say so myself. I like my hair messy so after I apply product to my wet hair I begin the process of blow drying it, then straightening it and lastly some wax scrunched through. Still in my towel I apply my makeup, going with my usually smoky eye and a clear lip.
I've chosen a pair of high waist black skinny jeans and a black lace bralette type top with strings that criss cross my chest, I started to stretch my ears so I have black acrylic tapers in them. I put my high heeled combat boots on to finish the look. When we leave I'll add my dark charcoal woollen floor duster coat to the look.
I hear the buzz of my intercom just as I'm double checking my makeup and putting my perfume on. Black opium tonight. Have you smelt that? Mmmm even I can't resist myself tonight.
Answering the door to loud "hellos" "wow" this looks great.
I pass out drinks and the food on the coffee table and we all catch up with what we did over Christmas break. Rose looks out of place and is acting quiet, and I can not seem to find it in me to ask why. If she needs me, we all know she'll come to me. I'm not chasing though. Mike goes on and on about his week in Australia with his family, playing cricket on the beach, how hot it is and how sunburnt he got.
We have devoured the food and have pre drank enough and decide it's time to head out. We order an uber and Jake fills us in that we are meeting up with some of his friends as well as the usual. The problem I have with this is that I have heard the crowd Jake is currently hanging with is a little rough, and I worry because Mike... well, is Mike right?
I'm at the bar ordering a drink, Alec has his arms around my waist from behind. Leaning back I have to yell, as the music is loud, to ask him what he wants after he hands me cash, not so subtly Alec nibbles my ear and makes me giggle when his stubble tickles my neck, he eventually tells me what to get, I order his and a rum and coke for myself. While waiting we bump and grind together at the bar.
Alec is handsome, dark hair and eyes, quiet most of the time but is goofy and makes me laugh. He isn't tall, actually he is about my hight when I haven't got heels on. His build is a bit more on the stocky side then lean, but his smile is cheeky and he is a genuinely nice guy. He isn't my one and I'm not his, it's more than convenience for both of us but it's also not forever, we both know it and we are both completely comfortable with that. He is fun.
The night wears on, we have a blast listening to all the old RnB music, getting out on the dance floor, flirting with anyone and everyone, singing at the top of our lungs.
I need a break so I tell Mike I'm going out for a smoke; he just kisses my cheek and nods at me. Grabbing my coat from my chair and my bag I exit the club into the fresh hair. I'm happy drunk, not legless but happy as I walk myself out to the smoker's area by the shop fronts near the club. Sitting myself on the manmade rock wall I pull a smoke out and place it between my lips.
"need a light" shit fuck shit shit fuck!!
Looking up into green eyes my smoke drops out of my mouth into my top.
" ahh... nooo I think im good thanx EDward" I look away, quickly searching down my top for my lost smoke and my lighter in my hand, quickly place said smoke back into my mouth and lighting it.
Taking a long drag and blowing it out slowly, I watch as the smoke swirls round and round.
Edward is still standing there; I can see the tips of his converse high tops.
He doesn't move, and I don't look up but I do sigh, loudly.
" can I sit" I asks quickly
"it's a free world Edward, do as you always do... and do what you want" I sigh without looking up, taking another drag and ashing my cigarette just to watch it float down to the ground.
"You do realise if I did what I want, you most likely wouldn't hate the living fuck out of me right now?" ..." scratch that maybe you would either way" he says that last part quieter and turns away as if that little bit at the end wasn't actually for me and was more like an errant though escaping his brain.
I lift my head to look at him, he isn't looking at me, he staring off the other way blowing O smoke rings into the air, so nonchalant like he doesn't flip my world up on its ass every time he makes an appearance. Surely my feelings are written on my face, right? Is he that blind? Metaphorically speaking of course. Or am I making an assumption, am I doing too him what I think he is doing to me. Gahhh I'm too drunk to figure that shit out. Even now I'm sobering up, my brain is too foggy.
Studying him, he is just as magical as ever. In my brazen mood I think about all the things I'd want to do to him if we were alone. That long neck that's currently stretched to the side as if to say "Bella... oh Bella... I'm right here just come lick me right here"
" Why are you out here alone?" I shake my head from its daze. I see his lips move but I heard nothing
"huh" is my very educated reply
He smirks at me but it doesn't reach his eyes, but I want to see them spark up again. I only seen it a handful of times but I need see it.
"I asked why you're out here alone" he repeats
" oh... ahhh... I need some hair" I reply wiggling my cigarette in my fingers to emphasise my real reason.
" you shouldn't be out here alone... there are some creepers around B...it's not ok"
I laugh, like big embarrassing belly laugh. Hold my stomach, nearly end up on the ground, tears rolling, laugh.
Edward looks at me like I've completely lost my mind. Most likely questioning my sanity.
"" the one person that can hurt me Edward...is sitting right here" I state nodding towards him just to make sure he gets it.
Elbows on his knees his head bows down to rest the heel of his palms into his eyes, releasing a growl. He just sits there breathing heavy. I stomp my smoke out and pick up the but to deposit it in the ashtray nearby.
Getting ready to leave Edward there because what else am I supposed to do, but I can't just walk away so I say a quick "catch you later" and start my walk back to the club.
I'm grabbed by my wrist, not tight but its firm enough to shock me. Of course, it's Edward and he is pulling me round a corner that has no one around. He cages me between his body and a shop front that's long closed down for the night, it dark but not too dark. I can hear the music from the club muffled by the walls.
He isn't touching me but his hand is up against the glass behind my head, his head bowed looking at his feet, leave me looking at the top of his head.
His breath is coming in short bursts like he is puffing, like he has run a marathon. Finally, he looks up into my eyes and all I see is pain. I want to fix it; I don't know how and if I try will I end up the one in pain.
"I'm going to kiss you" he whispers, his breath fanning across my face, cigarettes and mint. And as much as I want it...
"how's Tanya?" he slams his palm against the glass, but I don't flinch. I stay standing there just staring into his eyes
" Why... why can't you just forget about her Bella??? Hhhmmm why?" he asks, and im dumb founded
" How can I not Eddie!" he wants to call me Bella, tit for tat attitude is a toxic round about, but I'm sick of it all and I'm feeling quite childish right now. Like stomp foot and scream childish.
" She is your girlfriend, right? Hmmm? It's not something you just push aside Eddie!" I push my pointer finger into his chest but he doesn't budge
" You don't know anything B..." he sighs and its heart breaking. But is he playing me?
A tear slips thrown my cheek, he wipes it away and I look down at my toes.
"how am I supposed to know Edward??? How? You're so cryptic you make my head spin and stomach hurt..." sigh" ... "all that makes sense is that you come back into my life just enough times to make sure I'm still here... to make sure I don't forget" my tears are flowing freely now, no matter how many times he wipes he can't catch them anymore.
" do you want me to ask you to leave her? Because I won't... do you want to cheat on her? Is this your thing, is this what you do...?
" I have to go Edward... I can't go back in like this and... and I can't stand here all night while you look at me like that"
He steps back from me and I instantly grieve the loss of his nearness.
"what address?" he asked quietly.
" wh... why" hiccup
" Because im driving you home" he states matter of fact
I decide then and there it'd be better than have to uber it home in some stranger's car.
" lead the way" I gesture.
He grabs my hand and gently pulls me along past the club to the underground parking lot.
" BELLS" someone yells from behind, I quickly wipe under my eyes before turning around to see Jake, Mike and Alec jogging up to us with curious glances.
" What's wrong bells is everything ok" Alec states.
" um... yeah... yeah it will be once I'm home, Edward here offered and I couldn't say no..." glancing up at Edward giving him a half smile
" what happened" mike asks showing signs he is getting angry, something I need to nip in the bud
" don't stress Mike, seriously" I huff a fake laugh " dad just decided to send me a txt that had me worked up... Edward seen me and calmed me down and then offered to take me home.. promise Mike it's all ok"
Mike doesn't buy it but he is appease and pulls me in for a hug. Whispering in my ear to just say the words and Edward would be gone. For a split second I thought about it, but I couldn't. So, I laugh and shove him off and tell him to stop being ridiculous. I side hug Jake goodbye and Alec for the first time ever shows a possessive side and lays one on me and even adds in a groan for emphasis. Im to shocked to say anything other than a " see you later."
I turn around to grab Edwards elbow only to see he is angry and his fists are clenched. A slight tug and he responds, continuing to the parking lot. Only this time his hands are planted in his jean pockets.
He doesn't talk. He unlocks his car, gets in, starts the engine and backs out.
We drive in silence, his knuckles white on the wheel.
Pulling into my complex I point to my apartment parking space and he pulls in and shuts the engine off.
".. um... thanks for the ride" he is still staring at the concrete wall in front of us. I'm not done yet; I don't want him to go away again.
" can you come up for bit... um... well... if you have time... I mean" I stumbled over my words biting a whole through my bottom lip and then he finally looks at me and his eyes soften.
" Yeah, I think I do" and that's it. He jumps out of the car and I scramble out the other side. My heart is racing a million miles a minute.
Edward follows me up the stairs, I unlock my door and walk in stepping aside to let him in and closing the door behind him.
I take my coat off and hang it in the closet and I do the same with my boots. I sigh as my feet stand flat again.
I turn to see Edward is watching my every move as he stands between my dining nook a lounge room.
" this just your place?" he asks
I head to the kitchen to make a tea.
" Yep" I'm smile " sure is... it's not much but it's mine... would you like something to drink?
"Beer?"
I finish making tea and nod my head to the fridge to indicate to help himself then lead us into the lounge room.
I only have one couch so here we are.
I fiddled with the string hanging from my cup while Edward just watches me.
" Me and Tanya are over" huh. Come again. What the actual fuck. But I can't lose it any more I'm too exhausted emotionally.
" And you couldn't just say that why?" I look expectantly at him
" I don't know, B I don't know!!!!" he growls out
I just look at him. I'm out words he confuses me to know end and no question I ask is going to answer any of mine. So, I just wait. Edward has always been a quiet person, even as a child he was brooding. His home life was never spoken about even though I practically lived there I was there that often. It was always just him and his mom. No dad that I've ever heard of and no other male influence. I reminisce on time much simpler than now. Times we were carefree. Edwards childish features that no longer exist on the face in front of me, appear in my mind. One day I got sent to sit in the front of class because Edward and I were always talking when we shouldn't have been, so the teacher separated us. Another boy asked to be my friend and Edward had heard. At play time Edward pushed him over on the playground and laughed at him and told him to never speak to me again. Now I think back on it, it wasn't a very nice thing to do but I had followed Edward blindly, he was my best friend after all.
Another memory popped into my head. My first kiss. On his roof top. It was grad 4 and it was me, Angela and Edward playing truth or dare. Angela at the time was Stevens "girlfriend" whatever that meant at the time but she dared us to kiss. Now I think back on it I wonder if it was because she wasn't brave enough to kiss him herself and if we were always destined to be close but too far apart to be each other's "one and only". Have we always been just slightly out of step with each other?
Coming back to the present I realise Edward has finished his beer and placed it on the table beside us, my tea has gone cold so I get up to place his bottle in the bin and tip my tea in the sink.
I feel him before he says anything, his heat, that spark I always feel when he is near, it's like im to close to a fallen power line, the hairs that stand up warning me not to touch, because it'll hurt me or even kill me. He yet again cages me between the kitchen counter and himself.
Whispering in my ear " I like the hair" he pushes it out of the way and kisses me in the hollow below my ear " you're into body mods?" he questioned, while bringing his fingers up to touch the tapers in my ear.
"" mmhmm" is my only response
Spinning me around, Edward places his hands on my hips, very reminiscent of the time he had me up against the wall at my mom's house so many years ago. Im still yet to feel that way again.
Edwards starts running his nose from the apex of my breasts torturously slow up my chest too my collar bone and then to my ear, where I feel his tongue dip out to trace the shell.
I shiver at the sensations his breath and tongue produce.
"You yet again smell too good not to taste B..." he moans
He moves his nose back town to my collar bone and I tilt my head back, as he moves slowly to the other side.
Again, in my other ear " but this time I'm coming to taste all of you... no more interruptions... no more... barriers" he nips my lobe to bring home his point.
I can't help but moan and jut my hips towards his. No more denying myself the one thing on this planet I couldn't have.
With this in mind I grasp the hair at the back of his neck and pull his mouth down to mine.
Lips lock teeth clash, and sounds are made that would rival the animals I study. I pull myself up him like he is a life raft and im drowning but never breaking the kiss.
Edward plants his hand firmly on my ass and I use the heels of my feet to pull myself closer.
We break the kiss to breath but I don't stop my kiss and licking and tasting him. I do what I wanted to do earlier and lick my way up from the peak of his shoulder and neck all the way up to suck and bite his ear.
Edward growls and thrusts his hips into mine, making my jeans seam rub where I'm needy and wanting, I bit down hard on his neck and cry out.
" bed!" Edward grunts out and I slide down his body to pull him to the bedroom.
Once in the room I spin around and rip Edwards hoodie and under shirt straight off. I'm not wasting any time and immediately start on his belt buckle and zipper. Until I get an idea.
I spin Edward around and push him back on the bed and stop for breath and just admire the man in front of me.
Laying on his back but up on his elbows. Long lean lines of abs and beautiful intricate designs decorate his body. Edwards eye are dark and calculated, jeans unbuckled and open and his cock clearly outlined and straining against his boxers.
If this is my one and only chance with this man, I want it to me memorable but I also need a small amount of control. He has had it all and I'm taking some back.
I turn to phone and connect it to a speaker and set to "can't keep my hands to myself by Selena Gomez", not Edwards usually MO of heavy metal but making sure that the songs afterwards will also suit "the mood"
Moving close to the side of the bed as the music starts, I slide down to my knees by Edwards legs that sit over the edge of bed.
Sliding my hands slowly from his knees and to his thighs close to the inseam of his jeans I look up at him through my lashes biting my lip. Making sure I'm doing OK.
His chest rises and falls more rapidly the closer I get to the crest of his thighs.
As I move up, I slowly rise my body, moving my hands to the waist band of his jeans I move my head closer and lick a line from hip bone to hip bone and get to see his abs magically contract as I taste his skin and blowblowing air after the wet trail I leave.
I start my taste testing further up along the ridges of his abs, sucking and licking my way from ab to his nipples. Never forgetting that my hands are trailing just above where my mouth is going. Always keeping eye contact.
Edwards arms start to shake, showing signs he is struggling to hold himself up so I move up his body and straddle his hips.
One torturous deep hard grind down with my hips I push Edward flat on his back. Palming both my hands up his belly and chest as I roll my hips into is hot cock. My panties are soaked already and the feel of him between my thighs is electric.
I pinch his nipples and earn guttural moan as Edwards throws is head back, giving me free reign at his neck again.
His hands come too grasp my hips to pull me down on him harder as he bucks up. But I'm not ready.
I remove his hand and place them by his head and begin my journey back down his body. This time I nibble on each nipple giving each their due turn.
" ohhh fuuuuuckk B"
I grow bold hearing my nick name fall from his lips like this and walk my hands down his body to push myself upright.
Edward still has his eyes tightly shut and his head thrown back.
" Edward!... look at me please" I ask when he opens his eyes and looks up at me, I see his eyes are completely black he is breathing heavy and I cannot be any more amazed than right now that he is here with me right now.
Still moving my hips to the beat, against him , I reach for the bottom of my top and slowly gyrate my hips as I pull it over my head.
Edwards eyes go wide and he goes to sit, up hands out stretched.
"Nah ahhh... not yet" I pant and he groans, flopping back down.
" you're killing me B, you know that, I finally have you and your denying me" he growls
" but I'll make it worth your while Edward" punctuating this one last time by jutting my core against his one last time before i backup and stand.
Moving my hips seductively with the music I unbutton my jeans and slide them down my legs.
" they need to be wrapped around me soon babe, really soon"
I bite lip and smile slyly at him. Standing before him in just my black lace boy shorts, I bend down to slide his jeans and boxers off.
Edwards smooth steal member springs free and I have a slight moment of panic. He is not exuberant in size not that ridiculous size always described in them trashy novels. But he is larger than anyone else I've been with. Maybe 8 and half inches. My mouth Waters and I can't wait any longer to taste his essence.
I kneel down on the floor in front of him and Edward quickly sits up right when he realises what I'm doing.
"B ... you..you don't have to... babe seriously"
Wrapping my fist around him for emphasis " but I want to Edward...please" I flutter my eye lashes looking up at him. My fingers just touch when I make a fist around him
He falls back onto his elbows with a low drawn out " fuck"
Tentatively I lick the head where there is a small drop of moisture, and it's salty and musky but it's Edward, so I hum
Using my hand to help I take him into my mouth and hollow my cheeks and suck him right to the back of my through and then humm again.
" Oh... fuck... yes!" his whispers and lightly places his hands in my hair, there is no pressure, it just like he needed to do some thing with his hands.
While working him with my mouth and hand, I use my other hand to roll his balls between my fingers
Within a split second and a resonding 'POP' from my mouth, im suddenly on my back with Edward over the top of me.
" as much as I'd love to cum in that pretty little mouth of yours babe..." he sucks my nipple into his mouth and gently bites it then sucks it again to sooth the sting " it'll have to be another time"
Im embarrassed about how wet I am, I'd put money on a wet patch on my bed.
Edward works his way down my body. Not as slowly as I did to him. He is a man on a mission. He gets to my belly button. Looks up at me. Grins that cheeky grin then rips my panties straight from my body. I know I'll have a thin bruise there tomorrow.
Edward wastes no time and shifts me so my legs are spread and his nose is inches from more soaking core
" Hold on tight B"
He buries his face right where I need him and that's that last coherent thought I have. He has me floating on a cloud above us and there is no sign of coming down.
Edward licks from front to back and moans like im the best meal he has ever eaten or will ever eat again.
He adds one finger then quickly two than three, curling them in just the right spot as his tongue sucks licks and bites my clit. Im not going to last long and my orgasm starts barrelling though my body like I'm possessed. I can't be quiet.
" Ahh go... oohhh Ed.ed. edWAAAARDDDDDDD! starting in my toes tingling all the way up to the fire in my belly, I explode, and he keeps going, drawing out the most intense orgasm I have ever had in my life.
He has ruined me.
He slows down, bringing me down as he goes until I'm a literal mass of jelly. Panting, out of breath jelly.
Still holding my eyes tight shut I feel Edward working his way up my body with feather light kisses until he is at my ear.
Whispering " I'm not done with you yet B" he huffs an evil laugh at the end.
Have to leave it there my lovely people, but the next chappie is already well on the way.
Recs;
Drawn to the flame by Lozz.of.london
If your not already reading this you won't regret starting it, it is a WIP but oh so so soooooo worth it
"Bella Swan is privileged, sheltered and unknowingly naive. Edward Masen is tough, rugged and street-smart. Their worlds are so far apart, their experiences incomparable. But when there's a spark, it can become a flame; a flame a fire. Can they overcome their differences and learn from each other? Or are they destined to burn? AH."
A Woman of Conviction by Alycia
"Bella is a single mom of two boys trying to make ends meet. Edward is a successful business man. Can he help her? Will she let him?"