December 24
Shego woke up feeling surprisingly cold. She stretched and realized the space next to her was empty. She opened her eyes and blinked, looking around the room. Both Drakken and the dog were gone.
She sat up in confusion, and then caught sight of a note taped to the headboard above Drakken's pillow.
'We went to buy milk. Cuddles is tied up in the kitchen. I didn't want him to wake you. Breakfast is in the fridge.'
"We...?" Shego said aloud, and then realized he must have meant his mother.
She pulled the blankets higher on her lap against the unusual morning chill and undid the brace on her wrist. The brace was an incredible relief on the sprain, but after wearing it for a day and a night her skin had begun to itch terribly. Once she had it free, she scratched at the sensitive skin liberally and took another look around the room.
The dog crate was still by the door, but it was the only sign that the dog had been there. The animal had not in fact barked in the night that she had heard. And if it had made any messes in the room, they were either where she couldn't see them or Drakken had already cleaned them up.
She put the wrist brace back on and carefully slid her injured leg off of the bed. It didn't hurt so much as long as she wasn't moving.
She was gathering the resolve to stand up, when she suddenly spotted the missing crutch leaning against the headboard. She realized Drakken must have gotten up early to find wherever the henchmen had hidden it. As she stood up with the help of the crutch, she glanced back at the alarm clock. It was only a little after eight.
When did he have time...?
Shego went through her morning routine a bit more briefly than usual, given that her leg bandage wouldn't allow for a long shower or a relaxing soak in the tub. She dressed in black track pants and a baggy t-shirt, knowing that with her leg the way it was she was poised for a day of sitting around, whether she wanted to or not. And after brushing her hair and pulling it up into a loose bun she slowly picked her way to the kitchen on her crutch.
She had forgotten about the dog until she heard it barking before she even rounded the corner. Stepping into the kitchen, she saw the dog's leash looped through one of the chair rails, effectively confining it. It jumped in excitement as it saw her.
A glance at the dog's bowl showed her he'd already been fed, for which she was relieved. The dog's food smelled worse than it did. She wondered if she could get Drakken to take the time to invent some doggy breath mints...
She got the prepared plate of a yogurt parfait out of the fridge and sat on one of the barstools at the counter to eat. It was easier on her leg than the chairs at the table, and it kept her out of range of the dog's attentions.
Of course, it didn't stop him from barking.
'Arf! Arf! Arf! Arf!'
"Why do you like me? I don't like you."
The dog wagged its tail and dropped its tongue out of the side of its mouth.
Shego lightly flared her hand, and the dog only paused its excited wagging for a moment.
"I've tried to hurt you. Several times. But you were more scared of Drakken's stupid petals."
The dog strained on the leash trying to get to her, but she had about a foot's clearance. She smirked. For once, the dog wasn't being a complete torment.
She turned to the breakfast of yogurt with granola layered on the bottom and fresh fruit sliced on top. She considered making coffee, but her stomach still felt a bit queasy and she knew the acidic drink wouldn't help. Maybe after she ate.
'Arf! Arf!'
"Quiet, Shorty. I'm not letting you run around here."
She dug into the breakfast and considered the previous evening. She had been really tired and irritated, but she didn't think she had done anything that would have deliberately put off Drakken's mom. In fact, she had been as silent as possible during the hover car ride just in case she said something inappropriate.
Maybe his mom preferred a lot of chatter?
Shego spooned another bite into her mouth as she considered that. She had never really liked the 'girl talk' thing, but with an older woman it might be all right. The jokes would be different. Maybe she would even enjoy making fun of bimbos with her. Considering how straight-laced the woman seemed, she just might.
Shego's stomach turned again as she realized—she didn't even know Drakken's mom's first name.
"Oh..." she groaned quietly. She'd have to find out before any attempt at bonding.
'Rrarf!'
"You said it, Shorty."
Shego finished the breakfast and put her bowl in the sink. She decided she could use the opportunity of the empty lair to wrap her presents for Drakken and his mother. As she hobbled out of the kitchen the dog began yipping frantically and pulling hard against his leash.
"Fine, okay!" she said, turning back and undoing the leash from the chair. The dog's entire body wagged as Shego considered... If she put the leash on her good wrist and the dog yanked it suddenly, she might lose her balance with the crutch and fall. But if she put the leash on her bad wrist, she might risk re-injury.
With a sigh, she simply dropped the leash. The dog ran out of the kitchen to parts unknown.
"This is a mistake," she groaned as she headed toward her room.
In the minute it took her to walk down the hall the dog had reappeared at her side. She hoped it hadn't desecrated or destroyed anything in that time. But considering the terror it had caused in mere seconds the day before, she felt her stomach twist in concern.
"If you destroyed anything, I'm putting you back in that crate and melting the lock."
When she opened her door the dog ran past her. She frowned at her own lack of awareness as she stepped inside. The dog ran in circles around her small room, finally stopping to sniff at her tanning chair.
"Don't lick it. Tanning oil is probably bad for a dog."
'Arf! Arf!'
"Oy..."
She headed toward her dresser where she'd left the shopping bag with the robe for Drakken's mother. But...it was gone. She stopped in the middle of the room and began looking around. The bag was nowhere to be seen.
She narrowed her eyes at the dog.
"Did you get in here somehow and steal it?"
The dog only wagged its tail, still sniffing at the tanning bed.
"No... Drakken wouldn't have let you in here. The henchmen aren't stupid enough to come in here."
She sat down on her bed and picked up the phone extension, dialing Drakken's cell number. She wasn't in any condition to search the lair, and it wasn't practical anyway. Although why he would have moved the bag was beyond her.
"Hello?"
"Dr. D., did you move the present I bought for your mother?"
"Shhh! Ah, h-hold on."
Shego rolled her eyes and leaned on her hand. She heard him making some vague excuse and his mother's protests before he obviously moved to some place where she wouldn't overhear him.
"Shego?"
"Uh, doy. Who else? So did you move it?"
He hesitated. "I wrapped it and put it under the tree yesterday."
Her brow rose. "Oh. Uh...thanks."
"Should I not have? Did you have some special wrapping in mind that I—?"
"No, that's... Thanks."
"...Ah, you're welcome. Was...that all?"
"Yes. No. When are you coming back?"
"Probably...in about an hour. Mother is buying you a present."
Shego's brow rose. "That's a surprise."
"Mm. Yes."
Suspicion suddenly caused Shego to frown. "...Did you tell her to buy me something?"
"Ah..."
She hung up the phone and rested her forehead on her hand, shaking her head. This was going to be the longest two days of her life.
She carefully sat on the floor and reached under her bed where she'd hidden her present for Drakken. An hour would give her plenty of time to wrap it.
'Arf! Arf!'
The dog ran and put its paws up on her leg and began sniffing the cube-shaped, mug-sized box. She glared, but didn't push the animal away.
"You think he'll like it? He went on about it long enough... He'd better."
She carefully stood back up and clutched the box under her arm while she used the crutch to walk back down the hall toward the living room.
"And it wasn't easy to get either. He'll be happy whether he really wanted this or not."
'Arf!'
Shego's eyes shot open.
I'm talking to a dog...
Frowning, she entered the living room and dropped the small box onto the couch. She blinked in surprise when she saw the presents already under the Christmas tree.
'Rrrarf! Arf!'
As the dog ran by she bent over and grabbed its leash. Its happy run toward the tree was halted suddenly by its collar, and it yelped in surprise. Shego hopped toward the tree, pulling the leash closer until the dog was at her side, whimpering.
"Oh no you don't."
Holding the dog firmly, she narrowed her eyes at the four packages sitting on the green tree-skirt. They varied in shape and size, the smallest looking like a shoe box and the largest like a small dress box. Those two were rectangular, and the other two were closer to cube-shaped, but not quite. They fell between the other two in size.
Shego squinted and saw that the largest package was addressed 'To Mama Lipsky from Shego.' She considered the tag. She had called his mother that a few times in the past... Drakken paid more attention than she thought.
He had obviously put the robe and slippers in a box and wrapped them in a festive, snowflake-themed paper and done it up with numerous shiny, curlicued white ribbons and a large bow.
I hope this doesn't set a precedent...
Her brow rose as she saw that all three of the other packages were labeled 'To Mother from Drew' with a little heart after the word 'mother' on all three. He had gotten her three gifts, all wrapped differently. Would the woman be bothered that she had only gotten her one? Shego worried about her choice of gift briefly, but there was nothing to be done about it now.
She stared at the four packages and sighed. Then one corner of her mouth turned down. Where was Drakken's present to her?
Probably keeping it hidden in case I open it...
She smirked. He knew her well. She was sorely tempted to open his mother's presents too, to see what besides a robot vacuum he'd gotten her. Maybe an improved version of his voice-activated toaster...
Next to her, the dog whined and put its paws high up on her leg.
"Ugh, get down," she said, shaking the leash. The dog didn't comply, so she backed up until she could sit down on the couch. She tied the leash to the leg of the coffee table.
"There. You can't move that."
The dog was smiling and wagging its tail again, glad for the freedom. It leapt up onto the couch next to her and started sniffing at the box that held Drakken's present.
"Ohhhh no." She picked up the box and tucked it beneath the cushions at the far end of the couch where he couldn't reach it. "You're not touching that. And don't destroy anything while I find the wrapping paper."
The dog cocked its head at her as she hobbled back down the hall and toward his bedroom. That was the most likely place for the wrapping paper to be, all things considered. But a search of the wardrobe and closet and even a painful search under the bed only turned up clothes, various magazines and tools, and dust bunnies.
She leaned against the bed after finding nothing under there and sighed. She would have to talk to Drakken about the tools and circuit-bits laying in the closet and under the bed sometime. She rose on her aching good leg and started toward the lab. He must have wrapped the presents in there.
Another search through cupboards with tools and more pieces of robot parts than she knew he had again turned up nothing, and she tiredly sat in his chair in the lab. Where on earth could he have put it? He hadn't used it all by any stretch. Unless...he was terrible at gift-wrapping and had wasted most of it?
No, she had seen him wrap gifts before. That wasn't it.
She wiped her dusty hands on her t-shirt and carefully got up. The leg-injury had gone past frustrating to full-on infuriating. But she knew from the previous day that putting weight on her leg was only going to make both the pain and the healing-process worse. She grabbed the crutch again from where she had laid it against the desk and leaned on it with a sigh.
Maybe he put the wrapping paper downstairs?
That, or hidden in one of the many guest rooms were the only other possibilities. And she wasn't about to search any of those places.
She made her way back to the kitchen and grabbed one of the brown paper grocery bags from her shopping trip two days prior that Drakken had folded and tucked away for later use. Then she pulled scissors and tape out of the junk drawer. Tucking the items under her left arm, she made her way back to the living room.
The dog greeted her with repeated yips and jumps of happiness until he had gotten himself tangled in his leash. He began whimpering, and Shego chuckled as she sat down on the couch again.
"That's what you get," she said.
She laid out the bag, scissors, and tape on the coffee table and then pulled the present from where she'd hidden it and set it in the bag.
"I know I've heard some song about gifts being wrapped in brown paper..." she muttered as she stared at the task before her. How did one turn a bag into wrapping paper?
The dog's whimpering suddenly turned into panicked yelps, and she turned to see that it had gotten itself trapped up against the leg of the coffee table with part of the leash wrapped around its neck. She slid down to the floor and undid the leash from where it was tied around the table and started unwrapping it.
"Hold still!" she complained as the dog wagged its whole body in advance thanks of her saving it. When she finally had it undone she slipped the end of the leash onto her wrist. The dog jumped into her lap.
"Get. Off!" she said, shoving it away. It tried to climb on her again, and again she pushed it away with her left wrist as she pushed herself back up onto the couch with her right. "You are nothing but trouble."
The dog didn't bark, but wagged its tail and lolled its tongue.
"Ugh."
She turned back to her box and the paper bag. Maybe if she just...cut the bag open at the creases, and then wrapped it around the box? That wouldn't look good.
An idea struck her and she started cutting the bottom off of the bag. The dog jumped up on the couch and tried to get into her lap again. She shoved it to the floor with her elbow.
Once the bottom of the bag was removed, she cut down one crease to turn the bag into one big piece of paper. That was a much better starting point.
The dog jumped up and tried to crawl in her lap again. This time she elbowed it to the side and flared her hand. It took a cautious step back, but didn't jump down.
"Why aren't you more scared of me? I don't like you, and I'm not going to like you."
The dog wagged its tail harder knowing it was being addressed, and she rolled her eyes. She set about wrapping the box very slowly, not knowing if or when the dog might decide to jump up on the table instead. But for once, it seemed to take the hint. It sat down on the couch about a pillow's-width away from her and watched, tail still wagging every few seconds.
About ten minutes later she had the box wrapped with uneven folds and a haphazard tape-job. She grimaced and wished she could have found the pretty paper. The lousy job she'd done wouldn't have shown as much on that.
Now I need a pen, and a bow...
She pulled open the drawer under the coffee table and was relieved to find a pen there. She tapped the end of the pen on her chin for a moment as she considered what to write. Writing straight on the package was fine, wasn't it? Or would he be disappointed that there wasn't a fancy, festive tag like the ones on the packages he had wrapped?
She sighed. She wouldn't be able to find the tags anyway, and she wasn't about to go through the pain of another search.
'To Dr. D. love Shego,' she finally wrote on top of the box in one corner. She thought the 'love' might make up for the lack of pretty wrapping. She capped the pen and dropped it on the table, and then pushed herself up with the crutch.
Admiral Cuddles jumped down from the couch with a bark, wagging his tail. She expected the pull of the leash on her wrist, but it didn't come. The dog was standing at her side, looking up as if waiting to see where she was going.
"Hmmm."
Setting the box down, she picked up the discarded bottom of the bag she'd cut and crumpled it into a ball. The dog's whole body began to wag, and he barked joyfully. She dropped the end of the leash off her wrist and pitched the paper ball she had made down the hallway. The dog took off like a rocket.
Shego smirked as she hobbled toward the tree with her box, setting it out of sight behind the large white box that was her gift for Mrs. Lipsky. She would take care of a bow later, when she could drag out of Drakken where he'd hidden the wrapping stuff. Not that a bow mattered, since it was only decorative and didn't actually secure the package...
She rolled her eyes. What was the point of the holiday, anyway... So far it had been nothing but trouble.
The dog returned at a happy trot, the paper ball held between its teeth. It dropped it at her feet and looked up expectantly.
"Yeah...maybe later."
Shego stuck the end of the leash on her wrist again and picked up the scissors, tape, and other scraps before hobbling toward the kitchen to get rid of them. She didn't want Drakken knowing what she'd been up to when he returned. Especially since she'd done such a sad job of wrapping.
'Arf! Arf!' the dog yipped at her side.
She leaned against the counter after she'd put everything away and looked down at the dog. It was looking a bit anxious.
"You don't have to go out, do you?"
The dog turned in a small circle, stepping over his leash as he did so.
"Well, I'm not taking you. Let me get a drink and then we can watch TV. Drakken should be home soon."
She poured herself a glass and let the leash go. The dog had minded its manners so far... And now she had a trick to keep it occupied, should it get any ideas. After drinking the whole glass she made her way back to the living room. Admiral Cuddles traveled obediently at her side.
She sank into the couch and put her feet up on the coffee table and began flipping the channels. Everything was either a daytime soap, a Christmas special, a kids' show, or news. Absolutely nothing of interest.
It occurred to her that she could try to finish that movie that Drakken insisted was so important to his mother. Although she wouldn't have time before they got back from shopping... She could at least get a few more minutes of the black-and-white boredom under her belt.
She was thankful the VHS with the recording he'd made was still in the player and used the remote to get it started.
'Arf! Arf!'
The dog had its paws up on the couch and was holding the crumpled paper ball in its jaws.
Shego glanced between the dog and the TV screen, which had already begun boring her.
"Yeah...you're right, you're more interesting. Give it here."
She took the paper ball and tossed it next to the TV. The dog yipped in excitement and quickly brought it back, walking at the same pleased trot it had before. Shego repeated the action, and the dog did the same.
"Maybe you could be useful if you learn not to destroy anything..." she muttered. This time, she tossed the ball across the room toward the stairs.
The dog's leash dragged behind it on the floor as it scampered after the ball, and when he brought it back this time Shego noted it was getting just a bit slobbery.
"Okay... We're gonna need a new game soon."
She unfolded the paper and re-crumpled the ball so none of the slobber-contaminated parts were on the outside, and then tossed it all the way into the kitchen. The dog disappeared in a flash, claws clicking on the stone floor.
Shego yawned and leaned her head back. When the dog returned this time, she just dropped the ball on the floor. It picked up the ball again and set its paws on the sofa like before.
"Sorry, I'm done. Not interesting enough."
The dog stayed that way staring at her for several minutes as she stared at the TV screen. The lead character in the movie was giving away money as some sort of panic was going on in his town.
What a sap...
Admiral Cuddles finally dropped the ball and jumped up onto the couch. He tried to crawl in her lap, but she shoved him away hard. After a moment of staring and tail-wagging, he walked in a circle like a cat and sat down again about a pillow's width away from her and laid his head on the sofa cushion.
One corner of Shego's mouth went up in a smirk. "Now you're getting it."
She scratched the dog's head briefly, once, before folding her hands in her lap. At least it was a clean dog.
The movie went on. There was some sort of voice-over about the man not getting to do anything he wanted. As Shego shifted her leg, she felt she could sympathize. After only twenty minutes her eyes started feeling heavy...until...
"I just don't understand, sweetie. It's not logical."
Shego turned off the TV and straightened up, putting her feet on the floor. She moved too quickly and her leg stung beneath the bandages. She listened to Drakken's mother continue as the pair bustled through the door.