Here comes the angst!

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Poe checked the chrono one more time. The countdown to reversion from hyperspace to realspace was almost ready to begin. He checked his fuel level and decided he better have the X-Wing filled up before he headed back. He wondered briefly how the other fighters he had launched with were doing, but assumed everything was going as planned. They had been heading out on a minor raid of one of the Traagmol's bases; harassing them back for once. He had departed the Organa with them, flying an unmarked X-Wing (his was too recognizable), but his hyperspace jump had taken him to different coordinates than theirs.

He was going home.

He was giving himself 12 hours to see his new son. Skyler had been born three weeks ago under some very stressful conditions. Apparently, he had been a breech, but the doctor from the village had managed to give Rey a drug that relaxed her muscles enough that he had been able to physically turn the baby externally, ensuring his head would come out first. Rey's labor had then taken almost 40 hours before Skyler finally made his appearance, screaming at them all, letting them know exactly how he felt about his undignified entrance to the world. Poe felt himself smile as he recalled Finn's description of the event. In the end, everyone was okay, if very tired.

Poe had planned his escape right after hearing about the birth, but it had taken this long for him to feel comfortable doing it. It wasn't that he didn't trust the rest of his officers, but even they would admit that it had been Poe more than anyone else who had gotten them through some sticky situations of late. As he had told Finn, Poe was convinced at least some battle plans were getting to the enemy. However, Poe always had a Plan B, and so far, all his Plan Bs had won the day. It was to the point that his pilots and crew expected something to go wrong in battle and for Poe to immediately tell them to try this or that maneuver or that tactic and suddenly they were winning again and the Traagmol would slither away back to their lines near the Western Reaches. Word had it they were getting frustrated and angry.

Poe was starting to wish they would just send their whole fleet in at once and get it over with; he was confident the Republic was ready for them.

Within the last couple of weeks, the Traagmol had started taking prisoners. It hadn't taken long to figure out what they were doing with the prisoners, either; apparently, human flesh had become a delicacy to the Traagmol. Poe was now requesting only his non-human troops to fight on the ground; the Traagmol didn't take non-human prisoners. Poe had also begun begging the Republic and other private organizations for funds to send weapons to planets in the Mid Rim, giving the residents of those planets the ability to defend themselves better. Many of the beings that had come to aid the Resistance at Exegol were also stepping up to help the worlds that were being attacked by the enemy, and a few had even asked permission to officially join the Republic fleet. Poe welcomed every one of them.

Things had been somewhat quiet for the last couple of days, though that was about to change. The raid a dozen of his pilots were now executing against one of the Traagmol's bases was only the start of what Poe hoped would be the beginning of the end to this war.

Finally, it was time to exit hyperspace. Yavin's huge orange/red shape appeared in front of him, taking up almost all of his view. He dipped the ship down toward the lush green world beneath him, and almost immediately was hailed. "Unidentified X-Wing, please state your business."

Poe smiled grimly. He knew it was the wee hours of the morning at the base, but the fact that someone was awake and ready to challenge him made him very happy indeed. The skeleton crew he had left here was doing their job well. He sent his clearance code, keeping quiet.

"General?" It was Shane Mackie speaking; he recognized the voice. Shane's sister Stevie had been with Rey when their ship had been sabotaged and crashed on Kolbe several months ago. Stevie had not come home from that event, but Shane had remained committed to the Resistance and had become a valuable member.

"Ensign Mackie," Poe responded. "Are you the only one awake down there?"

"No, sir," Shane said, and Poe could hear a smile in his voice. "Sargent Innisfree is with me."

"Permission to land?"

"Granted, sir!" Shane said happily. "Welcome home!"

Poe brought the X-Wing down at the edge of the landing field. Both Mackie and Innisfree were there to meet him when he popped the canopy, Innisfree bringing a service ladder. Poe hopped out and climbed down, already breathing in deep the fresh, moist air of Yavin IV. He had spent very little time planet-side since this war began, and that mostly on Naboo, so the healthy dose of fresh, cool oxygen made him almost lightheaded. He faced the two men as his feet hit the ground. "Gentlemen," he told them. "I am officially NOT here. Please have the ship fueled up and ready ASAP." He noticed Shane looking at the astromech droid in the socket of the X-Wing with confusion. "Yeah, it's from the droid pool. No conversational skills whatsoever. It was a really boring trip." He started walking off the field. "Is Rey at home or at my dad's?"

Shane, who had grinned at Poe's words about the droid, answered. "She's at your house," he said. "Rose was staying with her for a while after the baby came, but I think it's just her and the kids, now."

"Thanks!" Poe acknowledged without slowing down. The walk in the dark invigorated him, and before long he was there. He moved carefully and quietly, but not surreptitiously; sneaking up on a Jedi was a bad idea. D-O, the little droid they had acquired on Pasaana, was in the living room, alert and focused on him. Poe was a bit surprised, as the little guy always seemed more comfortable in the command center. He raised his index finger to his lips, and D-O recognized him and respected his request to stay quiet. Poe moved toward Shaina's bedroom first.

The door was cracked and Poe opened it just enough to peer inside. His daughter lay sprawled on her belly, her thick hair spread about her head and face, deep in sleep. He smiled and moved to the other bedroom door. It was also cracked, and Poe opened it with care. He glanced at the bed and Rey's sleeping form before moving to the crib near the foot. Skyler, unlike his sister, was curled in on himself, his mouth moving in sleep as if he was nursing. Poe smiled as he took note of the head full of dark curls. Dameron hair. He almost touched the baby, but stopped himself. Dawn would be here soon enough, and who knew when the baby, and the others in the household, had actually fallen asleep? He could wait.

He sat in the lone chair in the small bedroom, his eyes roaming the space. Nothing much had changed since he had been gone, at least nothing that he could make out in the dark. He focused on his wife. She looked so small and vulnerable in sleep. He could see dark circles under her eyes, and like the baby, she was curled in a fetal position. Remembering Shaina when she was a newborn, he could imagine Rey wasn't getting too much sleep right now, especially since he wasn't here to help out. Of course, his dad was probably over every day, feeding her and Shaina. He took a deep breath, remembering the dreams that had been plaguing him during his short hours of sleep lately. They had not been shared dreams like he used to have with Rey. In fact, even now he couldn't 'feel' Rey like he used to. A part of him felt bereft upon realizing this, but another part felt happy. After all, the dreams he had been having had brought about a revelation; once free of the influence of Rey's Force energy, he felt like he was becoming himself again. And he hadn't even realized he had lost himself.

He had had Rey as part of his life for over four years now. He had always been drawn to the Force energy he could feel from her, and he had never questioned why. When she had finally started reciprocating his attraction, he had felt like the luckiest guy in the galaxy. The last Jedi wanted him! Everything had happened so fast after that, it was almost a blur. Marriage, a baby, moving to Yavin IV, another baby on the way, the war… He never really stopped to wonder. Why him? Why had she chosen him?

He knew she had been attracted to Ben Solo (he refused to say that other name). The idea disgusted him, but he had tried his best to ignore the thought of Rey with Solo; she claimed it was a connection in the Force, something that had not been her doing. That their connection had been so strong and so unique that they had actually been able to not only talk over great distances, but touch. Solo had died, but Poe knew for a fact that he had made contact with Rey through the Force at least twice, now. Maybe more?

Poe shifted in his seat, thoughts he didn't want to think about running through his head. Had Solo come here, to this house, since the war started? Had he made contact with Poe's children? They were both extremely powerful in the Force, just like their mother. It was something that made him equally proud and frightened. What if Solo was reaching them somehow? Teaching them?

What would have happened if Solo hadn't died?

Poe had often asked himself that question early on in his relationship with Rey, but he had never let it bother him too much. Rey had done a masterful job in making sure Poe felt special. Felt loved. But had it all been an act? Rey hadn't expected Solo to come to her rescue that day on Exegol. She hadn't planned on him giving his life for hers. What had she planned? A future with him? Children with him? Once dead and gone, had she set out to find the next best man? Had Poe, who had been smitten with Rey almost from day one, been duped into believing that Rey would love him forever, when all she really wanted was someone to father her Force powerful children? Was that all he was? A stud?

His brain ran wild with thoughts like these, and his logical side tried its best to shut them down, but it wasn't working. The longer he sat there looking at his sleeping wife, the more images of her and Solo popped in his head. He felt rage boiling up inside him. Had he really been that blind? Had him leaving for this long a time finally freed him enough from her Force bond that he was able to see clearly?

He shook his head, trying to get rid of the unwanted images, only to see Rey stir in her sleep. She was having a dream, he thought. And not a good one.

But Rey didn't dream, his logical side reminded him. She had visions. Was she with him?

Rey suddenly woke, her eyes full of fear and pain. She sat up and looked at him, and he could see in the grey light of the room when the emotion in her eyes turned to shock. "Poe?" she whispered.

He sat looking at her, still feeling the anger that had built up during his vigil.

She took a couple of deep breaths, then threw off the sheet covering her and rushed to him. She fell onto him and he couldn't do anything but catch her. Her arms were wrapped tight around his neck as she settled on his lap, and he could feel the wetness of her tears on his neck. He wrapped his own arms around her, almost involuntarily, then turned his face into her neck and breathed her in. Suddenly, all the anger and frustration and jealously faded away, as if it had never existed. He squeezed her harder. She had gained more weight during her pregnancy with Skyler than she had with Shaina, and she had yet to lose it. He appreciated the softness, knowing it wouldn't last long.

"Oh, kriff. You're really here," Rey whispered into his neck.

"I'm really here," he responded, stroking her back through her nightshirt. He closed his eyes and just held her.

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