The following day was particularly sunny for a Scottish fall afternoon. Unfortunately, you weren't going to be able to enjoy it. Having skipped out on actually studying yesterday, you decided to head to the study hall to make up for it. To your surprise, it was quite packed. Perhaps everyone was cramming in last minute homework for classes the following day.
You found a section at one table with no one nearby and made yourself comfortable. You were most struggling with Herbology. It was an interesting subject, but not as interesting to you as any of your others. You made a mental note to yourself to ask Neville for some help.
You opened up your textbook, Flesh-Eating Trees of the World, as you would soon be studying dangerous and carnivorous plants in class.
You had barely written two paragraphs of notes on Venomous Tentacula before you felt hands clutching at your ribs and someone yelling, "Boo!"
Your startled yelp gained the attention of everyone nearby. But you weren't the only one they were looking at. When you finally turned around, you realized it was Draco.
"What is wrong with you? You nearly gave me a heart attack," you scolded. You continued to look around the room as more and more eyes fell upon the two of you.
Draco laughed softly before sitting on top of the table, placing his feet on the bench.
"And can you not sit like an asshole?" you chided. A bit more laughter from Draco before he gave in.
"Fine, fine. Anything for you." The last line was spoken at a low rumble, probably to not draw in more attention.
Draco sat appropriately in the spot next to you, leaned in over your work, and asked, "What are you working on?"
"Herbology. I'm failing. Miserably."
"You? Failing a class? No way," replied Draco unconvinced.
"Well, not technically failing. But if I don't keep up, I will be. I'm hopeless in Herbology. I just can't stay interested."
"I can think of a plant you're interested it. Though, I suppose, a stick's not a plant, is it?" joked Draco as he elbowed you.
Annoyed at his playfulness, and annoyed at yourself for liking it, you closed your Herbology book and gave him a small smack on the arm with it. "The hell was that for?" he asked incredulously.
"For being extremely annoying. And annoyingly handsome. Now go away. I need to study. I missed out on a whole day of studying yesterday."
Draco's smile illuminated the whole room. People were still staring. You were certain, given his reputation, almost no one had ever seen him smile this much.
Draco stood up and bowed down to your ear. "Can't tell me it wasn't worth it." He started off towards the door but then turned around. "Can I borrow a piece of parchment and your quill?" he inquired. Indifferent to it, you obliged. You watched Draco scrawl something on the paper and then carefully blow on it to help it dry quicker. When he was satisfied, he folded it it half and gave it to you along with your quill. With that, Draco turned and left.
You opened the paper discreetly under the table, already growing flustered as countless eyes still hadn't left your area.
There was only one line written. "I needa private, secluded, space with you." You weren't sure what he meant. Your first train of thought led you to think that he was simply asking for some alone time. But then upon rereading, you realized the word "need" was written in cursive and underlined.
You pondered back to yesterday and tried to recall the myriad of conversations you had with Draco all afternoon. It then dawned on you. He eventually told you what the Room of Requirement was: A room fit for the seeker's needs.
He wanted you to meet back there but in a specific type of room. The clue he gave you, you thought, was what he wanted you to think while passing by. Smiling to yourself, you refolded the note and tucked it away in a pocket.
"Hello? Are you okay?"
Startled, you looked up and found Ginny and Dean standing over you.
"Ye-yeah? I'm fine. What makes you ask?"
Ginny and Dean both shot doubtful looks at each other. Dean started first. "We've been standing here for a good minute trying to get your attention."
"Yeah, we came in and saw Malfoy sitting next to you, but he was smiling? So, we were confused and just hung back. We came over to make sure you were okay once he left."
You hadn't realized you spaced out that hard while thinking of Draco.
"Oh, sorry. I just didn't sleep well last night." Lies. It was the first good sleep you've had since you arrived at Hogwarts. "I just spaced out, I guess." Not a lie, but you still felt a pang of guilt.
"Right, so is everything okay? With Malfoy I mean," inquired Ginny.
"And what was that note?" pressed Dean.
"Oh, that was nothing...Just, you know...A note from Professor Snape. Wants to meet with me...Something class related. And Draco doesn't seem as bad as everyone says."
Ginny snorted. "Please. His father knowingly gave me Tom Riddle's Diary at the start of my second year. I nearly died because of it."
"Not to mention all the people he's terrorized in the last, oh I don't know, six years," chimed Dean.
Anger boiled up inside of you. You knew this was your friends just trying to look out for you. Granted, they have spent six years with him, but did they really know him? "I'm sorry, Ginny, for what happened to you, but Draco's dad isn't Draco," you spat out.
Ginny's face did not hide her pain well. "I suppose that's fair. He's still made fun of my family and me for being poor. And others for being muggleborn."
You inhaled sharply and realized the weight of where your words could go.
"I'm sorry, Ginny. I don't mean to make light of your experiences. But people can change, right? Understand new things, acknowledge faults?" You were desperate for their understanding. A part of you wanted to know they would approve.
Ginny leaned in and put her head on your shoulder for a moment before speaking. When she did, she lifted her head and turned to look at you. "You have a very kind heart. You see good in people, and I would never want to take that away from you. I think-I think people can change. But I'm just not sure Malfoy has it in him."
You blinked back tears at her conclusion.
Dean expressed similar sentiments. "We just don't want you to get hurt. Malfoy has never been on the right side of the tracks."
You smiled a half-smile and reopened your Herbology book. You continued where you left off. Ginny and Dean began on some homework, but had continuous side conversations that were drowned out by your thoughts.
Deciding you wanted have some time alone to sort out both perspectives, you used the excuse that it was time for your meeting with Snape. As you were in the process of gathering your items, a white-bellied owl with tan feathers on its wings flew into the study hall. With a letter in its beak, it landed on the table in front of you.
Panic bubbled in your stomach and up to your throat. Disquiet sank its teeth into your chest. Owls only delivered mail at breakfast time unless it was an emergency.
It was well past breakfast hours.
"You alright?" Ginny asked. "You look like you've seen a ghost," she finished.
Your mouth was too dry to answer. All you could do was reach out and take the letter. You dreaded opening it, for you feared it held the worst. You breathed in fortitude and resilience as you opened the envelope and took out the paper. It wasn't enough.
You saw your name addressed at the top of the letter along with words like, "unfortunately," "inform," "sorry," and "peaceful." The words all muddled together into a blob of ink. You started to hyperventilate, and the shouts and questions from your friends were muted. Everything around you grew faint. The last things you remember before hitting the floor were your guttural screams and pleas of denial.
Three hours later
Your eyes fluttered open slowly. Your head hurt. A lot. You saw the school's healer, Madam Pomfrey, at the foot of your bed, as well as Ginny and Dean on either side of you. They both had their hands clasped around yours.
Ginny gasped and squeezed your hands while leaping out of her chair. "She's awake!"
Pomfrey shooed her out of the way to come around and check on you. "Alright, dear, how are you feeling?"
"My head hurts," you said.
"Ah, I worried as much. I gave you a Calming Draught for the nerves and a Wiggenweld Potion for your head. I'll come 'round with another dose for it," she explained. "Unfortunately, I used the last of my stock. I've been asking Professor Snape for weeks now to brew me some more, but does he ever listen?" she continued as she threw her hands in the air. "I'll be back after I give him a right piece of my mind." She scurried off while muttering something about teaching Snape a lesson he'd never forget. You wished you could see that.
You were glad that your friends were here with you. "Thank you for being here. It means a lot to me," you professed.
"Of course we're here. I'm sure Neville, Luna, and Seamus would be here too if they knew. We hadn't had the chance to tell them. We came with you and haven't left," said Ginny.
"Plus, we weren't sure how it'd feel having five people staring you down as you woke up, even if they were all your friends," added Dean.
"It would make me feel like a freak. I suppose, though, I did a great job of making myself out to be one anyways. How bad was it? I kind of blacked out..." you cringed.
Dean and Ginny exchanged quick glances of concern.
Ginny was the one to answer. "It wasn't pretty...But most everyone was just concerned. Dean grabbed the letter, though, to make sure no one was able to read it after all the chaos."
Dean reached into his front jean pocket and took out the crumpled letter. "Sorry I couldn't preserve it better," he said shamefully.
You closed your eyes as a few tears dripped down your face. "It's okay, Dean. Thank you for grabbing it and protecting my privacy."
Ginny began to nervously fiddle with her fingers as she averted your eyes.
"What is it Ginny?" you asked with bated breath.
"Please don't think ill of us. I was so concerned for you. I've never seen anyone in such hysterics. I couldn't imagine what was on the letter, so I read it. Dean did as well." Ginny's voice wobbled with apprehension.
You nodded your head slightly, trying to surmount the probable questions and consequences to come. You turned your head towards Dean and then to Ginny.
"It's okay. I know you were just worried. I couldn't ask for better friends. Now that you know things, I'll have to confess some stuff." Your voice trailed off in dread.
"You don't have to tell us anything you're not ready to," comforted Dean.
"No, I need to. I need to own up to what I've done. And once I tell my story, you might find that you won't want to be my friend anymore anyways." You sighed heavily before continuing. "The real reason I transferred was technically my parents. But it's more than that. My parents always lived this happy, idyllic, and loving life. They had the perfect marriage. Or so I thought. Things started to spiral especially when I received my acceptance letter to Ilvermorny. My parents knew there was magic deep in their bloodlines and that it was a possibility. But our whole lives were turning upside down."
You paused for a moment to take the hits of anguish that came with reliving your story.
"The arguing happened more often. It was worsened by my absence because to them I wasn't there to endure it. I-I-I..." Your voice shook so much that you weren't sure either of them could understand any of your words. You took a deep breath in to steady yourself.
"I tried to brew a Draught of Peace. To make them stop fighting. I just wanted them to be happy and in love again. To talk to each other without anger and yelling. But it's a difficult potion to brew. The tiniest of mistakes could cause drastic and irreversible effects. As for me, that's what happened. I'm still not sure exactly, but I think it was the Hellebore. You need seven drops, and I think it's possible that I put one too many without realizing. The big, bad, and permanent side effect is-i-is..." Sobs wracked your whole body, rendering you unable to continue.
"An irreversible sleep..." finished Ginny for you.
You nodded and mustered up some more spirit to continue.
"I was too ashamed to finish up my schooling at Ilvermorny. I reached out to Dumbledore immediately for a transfer request."
"And now the healers back home have reached out to tell you that they passed..." added Dean.
When the realization hit you, you were gutted, smashed, and broken beyond repair.
"I killed my parents," you croaked out.
You flung your hands to your face and wailed. Ginny and Dean continued to sit by your side, unwavering and dedicated to supporting you. The sobs maintained consistency but lowered in volume. Ginny was the first to speak up.
"You were wrecked with pain and guilt. You tried to bring joy and passion back into your parents lives. I'm sure they harbored no ill will towards you. Only adoration for a daughter with so much compassion for others."
Dean's face betrayed the conflict he was facing. "I can't lie. That's heavy stuff, mate. But I can't say I wouldn't have tried the same in your shoes. My father abandoned my mum and I when I was just born. He was trying to protect us from Death Eaters. He was later killed. For years, she never even knew he was a wizard or the lengths he went to protect us. I would have done anything to ease her agony. I'll take your secret to the grave, and my respect for you will go beyond that."
Ginny gripped your hand with comfort. "The same goes for me. I'm not going anywhere."
The elation from seeing how not alone you were, how loved you were, made your body convulse with more weeping. You became incoherent and inconsolable, but Ginny and Dean stood by you as promised. Even after perhaps half an hour of crying, they didn't leave.
Time felt empty and meaningless. You weren't sure how much had passed. Between your wailing and moaning, you heard the infirmary doors open. You thought it was Madam Pomfrey, until Dean shouted out.
"The hell are you standing there staring for, Malfoy?!"
Draco? You wanted to turn and look for yourself, but your chest was so tight that you couldn't bring in any air. You just wanted the pain to stop. You didn't want Draco to see you like this. It felt like the ventricles of your heart were contracting and expanding. The pain shot through your entire chest and into the pit of your stomach.
You knew your face was probably severely red and puffy. You thought you looked like a monster. It would be fitting. You felt like one.
An irate Ginny briskly moved to Draco in a firestorm of fury. When she was a woman with a mission, you never wanted to be in the direct path. "Bugger off, Malfoy. You're a spineless, gutless, heartless, cowardly mountain troll, and the last thing that she needs right now."
Note to self: do not ever piss of Ginevra Molly Weasley.
It was difficult to make out for sure with your tear stained eyes, but Draco looked hurt. You heard his voice crack as he uttered out a small, "Please."
Ginny was many things. Loyal, dedicated, fierce, and determined were a few that always came to mind first. Being the youngest of seven siblings, the other six all being boys, the last thing Ginny was was a doormat.
Maybe it was the convictions you voiced earlier in the study hall, or the fact that Ginny, like yourself, looked for the good in others. Perhaps it was the fact that Draco's voice oozed with urgency, and he made no attempts to fire back at Ginny's insult. Whatever the reason, she let him pass.
Dean stood up rather abruptly and got into Draco's face.
"Malfoy I swear to god if you-"
"Stop, please," you managed to spit out between sobs.
Dean looked down at you puzzled. All you could do was mutter out another "please." His expression remained baffled, but he stepped aside and granted your request. He moved to stand over with Ginny, and they both watched on, ready to pounce at anything they didn't like. It seemed your friends would learn more than one secret today.
"Dra-co," you hiccuped out.
"Sh, sh. It's okay," he cooed. One hand held yours tightly while the other brushed away hair that clung to your forehead from sweat.
The last thing you heard before passing out from the unequivocal misery of the day was Draco whispering, "I'm here. I'm not leaving."