Makino-sensei: I understand that you're now training to become a hero. However, I would appreciate it if you could write me beforehand when you are planning on not attending a lesson.
Izuku lets his head plop down onto his pillow. He'd completely forgotten about his parcours lesson after his... second strange experience in less than two days. It's the stress that's surely getting to him, he guesses. Also, he doesn't think he even could have appeared as he'd been too tired to have his eyes open for long and his body was aching still when he'd lied down on his bed. Heaving himself up into a sitting position, he risks a look at his mobile phone's inbuilt clock. Eleven at night.
Izuku: I'm sorry, sensei! It won't happen again. he types out fast in response.
He listens to the crickets chirping outside his window, lets himself be lulled by their never-ending monotonous song as he massages his slightly aching head with clammy fingers. The night is stifling; he wonders how he'd even slept in the heat of his room whilst wearing the majority of his school uniform. Sweat pearls roll down his back. Izuku quickly pulls off his white dress shirt and puts it aside. The pants come next. And then he's sitting on his bed half naked. Just sitting. Nothing more. His eyes are unfocused and... he doesn't think. For the first time in... well, he doesn't know how long it's been but he doesn't remember when it had last happened... for the first time in forever, his head stays empty. There's seemingly nothing inside but a big and silent void. Izuku doesn't want there to be anything in its stead. The thoughts he'd have would revolve around those weird occurrences and he'd rather remain a shell for a couple of seconds. He drifts. More than a few seconds.
A single conscious but hazy gaze leaves him with an impression of his kitchen. Then he's eating a bowl of cereal. Maybe the taste of chocolate filling his mouth slightly pulls him back to reality. "Didn't know I could do that" he thinks, staring still somewhat absentmindedly at the slowly browning milk. "I didn't do it. Not by myself. It just happened" he adds internally. Like so many things nowadays tend to happen to him. Like the man on the train and the... the...
The bowl shatters on the floor.
Izuku's hands have abandoned him. They're shaking, shaking, shaking and can't do anything else. Helplessly, he sinks down on his knees, trying to reach for the larger shards. But his hands don't work. They tremble instead, harsher at the memory of a soulless eye rolling towards him; harsher at the memory of the feeling that had befallen his body in the train. Izuku swallows although his throat's painfully dry.
The Midoriya's ears don't acknowledge the nearing shuffling footsteps of Inko's bunny-themed slippers on the hallway's tiles. "Izukkun?" Inko asks into the room.
He laughs; it's a borderline hysterical thing. "Oh, mom! Um, had a little bit of an... accident here." Forcing his hands into obeying, he collects the shards. Since when does he let himself be intimidated? His fingers cease their unwanted movement. Calmness settles in, gaining strength with each further deep breath he takes.
"Are you sure everything's alright?" His mom doesn't sound convinced in the slightest. There's a tiny waver in her voice, which festers guilt on his tongue that tastes like the bitterest coffee in existence. Izuku brings himself to smile. "Yeah!" he quips, internally wincing at the faux cheerfulness, "I was just a bit clumsy... I don't know, maybe my muscles are still a bit overtaxed. Heroics sure are exhausting, I can tell you that!"
His mother's shoulder sag down – a sign she believes him (he's gotten quite good at lying over time). "Oh, well then." she sighs in relief, "Just don't stay up too late. Try to catch some sleep, dear." With that and a quick hug, she retreats back to her bedroom.
Izuku's still working on breathing without falling into that overwhelming feeling of dread. It's hard. Harder than it should be. He should be fine. It was just a dream. A really weird one, mind you, but still. And – And! The man on the train? Like he'd already put together: That was probably just a guy who, even in his old age (or maybe because of his age), can't control his fear-based quirk. That's it. That's it. Yes.
The tiles are comfortingly cool under his sweaty palms. He's sat down once more on the floor after having disposed of the shards and remaining cereal. Izuku rests his hands on the tiles that have little specks of light grey mixed into their creamy white. It grounds him. It steadies him. He feels a bit like a cloud threatening to be swiped away by the slightest hint of wind. Or like a misty fog lying heavily on a open field. Both at the same time. Airy but dense and choking.
"This is your place, your safe place." he suddenly hears Aizawa-sensei's voice, describing to him the sunny forest inside his head. He's right. It's his safe place.
In the shadow casting light of the kitchen, he lies down with only his boxer briefs on and shudders as his sweaty hot back hits the cold stone. Here, he can almost think of the light as the sun above him when he closes his eyes. There are no rays of warm sunlight but he'll make do with what he has.
A sunny forest. It smells fresh, so fresh. The tree trunks are lined perfectly – just chaotically enough to be natural but close together and yet giving one another space to grow. Lush green grass pops out from a couple of spots near protruding roots. Otherwise, he lies in a heap of fallen leaves of various shades of brown. Izuku's almost astonished at the peace this place harbours. Almost. Before he remembers he chooses this peace. It's his. His place and his peace. Nobody and nothing – no strange old men nor any odd rotting deer – is going to destroy what he has here.
Mentally, Izuku reaches for the sun that shines through the crowns of the trees. And, simultaneously, he reaches for the few clouds in the sky. There weren't any the last time he'd been in here. He knows why but doesn't want to think about it. Instead, he lets his ears perceive the chirps of those two robins.
Izuku is at ease.
The deer is gone.
...
"You, good Sir" Mu says, dropping her lunch in front of Izuku's bento box, "look like absolute shit."
Somehow, Shimiru and Mu have managed to carter him off to the cafeteria even though today's probably the worst day for something like... the existence of noises, in general. That's what he gets for passing out on his bed like a big old noodle and waking up in the middle of the night. Izuku's head is beating like a jungle drum (da-rum-tum tum-tum-tum-tum) and the eyes of a million thousand hundred billion UA students stick on him.
"Oh? A whole million thousand hundred billion?" the blue haired girl quips dryly. Oh, that's what Izuku's wanted – his habit breaking out at random again.
"Yes. A whole million thousand hundred billion. And I know I look bad." he grumbles into his carrots.
"Like a damn corpse, Kiwi. A Kiwi-Corpse, if you will." Mu sagely nods and Shimiru hides a grin. She's really not that great at pretending she doesn't find the snake girl funny. It's kind of cute, really.
But Izuku's not in the mood for anything right now – other than his soft and comfortable bed at home, naturally. Until he reaches his destination, he'll have to endure another hour of (ugh) English after lunch. Incredible. Just what he needs to make this day absolutely perfect: An hour with Present Mic.
Mu grunts between bites of her chocolate croissant: "I dunno what you have against Mic."
"I'm also rather at a loss on why you dislike him." the starry girl adds after taking a sip of her fruity tea.
"It's not that I hate him." Izuku defends lamely, "It's just... I told him to shut up right in front of his own class and then he left me to the wolves. We started off our relationship just as weirdly. Have I told you about my classroom? Mic's decorated it. And he doesn't stop. I thought he was done when I met Aizawa-sensei there yesterday but today I came in and found a statue of liberty by the door. Like, at least as tall as Otakebi. Scared the living daylights out of me when I came in. And there was a Christmas tree in another corner of the room and a bunch of other stuff I couldn't even identify. He's sending out strange and conflicting signals, is what I mean." he finishes with a sigh.
"Oh, yeah. That does sound like something he'd do. He's passive-aggressive as fuck, no joke. I sometimes listen to his podcasts online, yeah? Last time he'd invited a hero who made a very not-okay sexual comment and-"
"You mean Ayo-Dine?" Izuku interrupts.
Mu nods. "Exactly that one. The whole podcast was just Mic-sensei passively ripping the guy to shreds. He even had to have a smoke break at one point. You know what Mic did during those five minutes? Dude just goes ahead and covers I Can't Decide by the Scissor Sisters. What I wanna say is I know he's weird, totally, but also kind of a savage and I'm living for it, not gonna lie."
Shimiru raises her eyebrows at the story. "Really? And here I thought he was just innocently excited – like a... yipping puppy."
"No, no. That bitch's all bark all bite. He once got into a fistfight with a villain who had claws and sensei won without his quirk." Yellow eyes look at Izuku. "That's why I know Kiwi's gonna be terrifying some day."
Said boy blinks tiredly up at her, having nodded off a couple of times.
"Some day." Mu emphasizes, swinging her water bottle at Shimizu when she huffs out amusedly at the ironic imagery.
All of a sudden, someone shouts: "THAT'S HIM?!" and half of the cafeteria stills in gossipy interest.
At first, Izuku doesn't think much of it. Why should he? He hasn't done anything to warrant a yell, for sure. His mistake. Obviously, he's meant. Who else? Literally anybody else other than him? No. Izuku's the target of everything, including the aforementioned loud exclamation. Before he knows it, he's staring at three upper year students. One of them is hiding underneath the nearest table but the Midoriya immediately recognizes him. Shit. It's the guy whose nose he's broken. That combo of elf ears and indigo hair is unmistakable.
Izuku sits up straighter. Mu and Shimiru have stopped their Present Mic banter and instead warily eye the large blond pony tailed student whose face remains deceptively friendly. "So, you're the one who broke Tamaki's nose?" he asks Very Politely.
"Izuku-kun would never do something like that." Shimiru answers coldly.
Mu glowers at him. "Kiwi wouldn't." she agrees.
And Izuku wants to disappear.
Hesitantly, under the guy's scrutinizing gaze and his friends' wrongly deserved back-up, he stutters out: "U-Um. Yeah. About that."
Shimiru and Mu whip around to face him. "What?!" both of them say at the same time.
"See, I didn't do it intentionally!" Izuku tries to explain.
The third stranger student, a girl with light blue hair, tilts her head confusedly. "Huh?" she asks not unkindly but certainly curiously, "You accidentally broke Tama-kun's nose? How do you accidentally break someone's nose? How weird!"
"Yes. How. Weird." the blond one enunciates with a false smile, each word dripping in venom.
"M-Mirio..." the victim of Izuku's extreme jazz hands whispers, "I... I think he might have done it a-accidentally, like he says."
"But how? Ho-Ow?" the girl questions in the background, again and again whilst bouncing slightly from left to right and right to left.
Izuku's so, so tired. God. Everyone's watching. Everyone. The only reason he hasn't already fled to his secret hideout (also known as the boys' toilets) is that his mind is too mushy and sleep-deprived to conjure up enough anxiety. Whether that's a good or bad thing is yet to be decided. For now, he gesticulates with his nose-breaking arms during a badly murmured retelling of the event: "SoIWasLikeMindingMyOwnBusinessAndListeningToMusicRight?AndWhat'sHisName?Tamaki,IThink,WantedToAskForTheTimeAndI'mTurningAroundSoFastCuzI'mStartledAndThenIaccidentallybrokehisnoseohgodimsosorryiwantedtoapologizeandhelpbuthewasalreadyrunningawayfrommeandhewassofastandicouldntcatchuptohimsoi-"
"OOOOH! That's where I know your voice from! You were the guy having an existential crisis on the toilet yesterday!" The pony-tailed student – Mirio – declares triumphantly and hits his own palm with his other hand's fist. Undoubtedly, a great mystery has just been solved.
"I want to die." Izuku says to no-one in particular with Shimiru patting his back comfortingly.
"On the toilet? An existential crisis on the toilet? You're a silly little man! And a miserable little man!" the older girl tilts her head once again.
Mirio's expression shifts, becoming gentler. "I believe you about your accident with Tamaki. You obviously have a lot of problems."
"What's that supposed to mean?" Mu grumbles half-heartedly but Mirio doesn't pick up on it.
"If there's anything I can do for you, come to me. I'm from class 2-B, Toogata Mirio the name!"
Bury Izuku. Bury him far out in the woods where nobody will ever find his body. Mirio has fallen into a saving-people-state. Because he probably thinks Izuku's a madman or riddled with suicidal fantasies about becoming the earth itself... or both.
His manners kick in before he can stop them: "I'm Midoriya Izuku, class 1-A."
"Ah, so you're the infamous single student of 1-A. That explains it, I guess."
"..."
The bell rings.
"Oops, well, as I've said, come to me if you have any troubles!"
"..."
Mu drags him into English and Shimiru keeps sending him worried glances. He honestly doesn't care anymore.
Izuku is absolutely done with this day.