GNR LEVELER
PETTY OFFICERS MESS
THREE HOURS LATER
Well, he had survived. How? That was thanks to General Skywalker, who flew below him and Ahsoka, who used the Force to pull him into the back of the CR-20.
After the vulture was blown to bits by Hallena Devis, who was manning one of the ball turrets, which had knocked him out completely for a good hour or so from what he had been told, the medics cleared him with a very mild concussion an hour or so prior. Got to love helmets and armor.
Now he had a bottle of pure Mando'a tihaar on his left and a full shot glass sitting between his elbows which were braced on the counter of the bar, and sack of clone trooper rank/number tabs (each a quarter inch wide, one inch long) sitting in front of the shot glass, partially wetted with said tihaar. His head was resting in his hands with his now unloaded 15A leaning against the counter, his helmet, sporting a few new dents and scratches, perched atop the barrel. Chest plate, gauntlets, and shoulder plates stacked next to it, back plate melted beyond practical repair next to it all. He didn't even hear the footsteps of somebody approaching.
"Rex?" A female voice softly asked, hand on his right shoulder, stool creaking as they sat next to him.
He looked over and found Ahsoka, still in overalls, sitting next to him, her hand on his shoulder shifting to his lower arm, eyes filled with concern.
"You're too young to drink." Rex says with a quick huff of amusement.
"Says the person who is the same age as me. From a certain point of view." Ahsoka says.
Rex chuckled and let his arms drop to the counter.
"Do you ever have days where everything you thought you knew was gone, overturned, and you don't know where to start and make sense of it?" Ahsoka asks, placing her other hand next to the other.
"You bet. Happens a lot." Rex says, downing the shot glass and pouring another with his left.
"How do you cope?" Ahsoka asks.
"Good question." Rex says, tracing the rim of the shot glass.
"Do you cope?" Ahsoka asks.
"I'm still standing." Rex says.
"I'll tell you mine if you tell me yours." Ahsoka says.
"*sigh* Alright. *deep breath* I am a solider. Nothing more….or less. Don't know much, if anything, outside of combat. No blood family, apart from the troopers who surround me, though many others do and live or lived lives outside of constant warfare. Yes, I may be an adopted Mando'ade, but a lot of other troopers, like Ince, Vere, and a good chunk of these lot, weren't or never will. And they will never know anything else but constant warfare." Rex says, taking the shot glass in hand, gesturing to the bag of rank and number tabs before pouring the shot glass on them, refilling the glass.
"Nobody should die that young." Ahsoka says, spotting a few that had really low numbers.
"Whole battalions, regiments, legions, and corps of those I call my brothers will and already have. Maybe all of us. We all know this, but why do I, and my men, my vod'ika, feel….cheated?" Rex asks, Ahsoka grabbing his hand with both of hers.
"Is it true what Geith says? That we're guilty of using you? That we're all following orders blindly and not asking enough questions?" Ahsoka asks, staring at the tabs.
"*sigh* I don't know, Ahsoka. Slick, a clone you will never meet, thought the same on how we're being deployed and ordered. And he's why Christosis, and possibly Teth, was such a bloodbath. Although I've been following them for my whole life and never run astray. Well, not much. But there's been a few." Rex says, third shot down the hatch.
"You said that orders were there for a reason. That they kept us alive." Ahsoka says.
"That is very true. Same for regulations." Rex says.
"Jedi have them as well. Like no attachments. You've seen Callista and Geith. Master Altis lets his Jedi marry if they want. But they haven't fallen. So which is true?" Ahsoka asks.
"Remember what I said of the bigger picture. Sometimes you don't have it and get orders because somebody higher up has intelligence you don't. It is possible that's why your Order has it the way it is. It is possible that some Jedi end up in places meant to be, such as Master Altis' group. Those that can handle it find Altis, those that cannot stay with the Order, on what I believe, simply leave the Order." Rex says.
"*sigh* Master said the same thing. The world is full of attachment. I just don't know why it's wrong only for Jedi." Ahsoka says, hand still on his, tracing patterns on the armor plate covering the back of his hand.
"You think it would have been simpler to say it was only one woman stuck in Athar and that we shouldn't have gone in because it risked, and cost, more lives?" Rex asks.
"Possibly. But that wouldn't have been the right thing to do." Ahsoka says.
"Now that's the decision of an officer, like us, have to make all the time. We make the orders to call a halt or retreat because risks outweigh the gains of lives saved. Remember when the General, you, and I talked about that after Teth?" Rex reminds Ahsoka.
"Yes, I remember. I argued with Master about it as well. He was the one who said he would never abandon anyone." Ahsoka says.
"General Yoda faces the same with your Order. It is possible the Jedi found out long ago that it was easier to make the tough calls without any, or minimal, emotional involvement. From what I've been taught, a cold distance makes the decision easier to make and live with them afterwards. That's also Command." Rex says, fourth shot down, slid the shot glass to a droid, capped the tihaar bottle, and tucked it along with the rank tab bag into a semi-armored satchel next to his decimated armor.
"Do you understand the dark side?" Ahsoka says, placing her hand back on his.
"No. Not really. Although it made me….curious in the….abilities of the Force after that….hairless harpy attempted to rifle through my head like an open data card." Rex says, becoming suddenly uncomfortable.
"Neither do I." Ahsoka says.
"What's the difference between a Jedi who falls to the dark side and a Jedi who diverts from their duty?" Rex asks.
"I'm still trying to figure that out myself. I won't let anything happen on my watch, though." Ahsoka says.
"Like letting a trooper fall to their death?" Rex asks, smirking.
"Yeah. Like letting a trooper fall to their death." Ahsoka says, smiling back.
"Thanks, Ahsoka. You'll make a good Jedi." Rex says, patting her hand and getting up, slinging his satchel, grabbing his helmet and chest armor.
"Need any help?" Ahsoka asks.
"Sure, why not?" Rex says, handing her his gauntlets and smaller sections of armor.
Within a good ten minute walk, they were in Rex's temporary cabin and were setting his things inside of a larger semi-armored bag.
"Do….do you have any attachments, Rex?" Ahsoka asks, sitting on the edge of his desk.
"Yes. I was adopted, as mentioned before, by a Mando'ade who was a trainer. Then there's the brotherhood all clones, regardless of template, who are in military service share across the Republic. We all know, roughly, what the other has gone through. Without that connection, we wouldn't make the sacrifices we do. If we all stand, fight for our brothers of blood and arms if nothing else existed, we still won't fall easily." Rex says.
"But you mentioned this clone Slick. What happened?" Ahsoka asks.
"*sigh* He wanted freedom from the Army. In order to do so, he chose to go aruetii, traitor, and got many of his brothers killed before, during, and after in his attempt to do so. He sabotaged the majority of our weaponry in an attempt to escape and collect on a promise made to him by that Dha'Jetii, Ventress. From what he told me, and what she later attempted with me, was the promise of freedom for him all his brothers if he, or me, helped her. Slick became affected by his choices and faltered enough for capture." Rex says, sitting in the desk's chair.
Ahsoka seemed to zone out for a bit, staring at the wall.
"'Soka?" Rex asks, bringing her back.
"Sorry. Zoned out a bit." Ahsoka says.
"You alright?" Rex asks.
"Back to what I said about using you and your brothers. I feel like we are." Ahsoka says, tearing up.
"Ahsoka. For a definite fact, you and General Skywalker are not. The others see it the same as I do. You fight at the front, not at the back, which shows you care about us. And because of that, the 501st will go anywhere and do anything for you and the General. Authorized or not." Rex says.
Ahsoka then slid off the desk and gave him a hug.
"If I ever get the chance, Rex, I will make everything up to you. One way or another, you and your brothers will know something else than war. I don't know when or how, but they will." Ahsoka says, looking him in the eyes.
"*sigh* You don't need to do that. The thought is enough for me. But thanks, 'Soka." Rex says as she got up and headed for the door.
"No, thank you, Rex." Ahsoka says, smiling as she reached the door.
"If you need to talk, you're more than welcome to come to me. Door is always open." Rex says.
"Same with me. Oh, one last thing. Master Skywalker says that we'll be stood down and on patrol duty for resupply and reinforcement. Thanks again, Rex." Ahsoka says, leaving the cabin, a soft and warm smile still present.
"Not a problem, 'Soka." Rex says as the door slid shut.