It was a really beautiful day. It'd been quite long since the last time the edge was basked in such bright sunshine. It was pretty strange for a day in late autumn. Everything today screamed hope. There was this sweet zephyr slowly seeping in. The air inside turned soft and warm. It lured Hiccup to the door. The second he pushed it open, the wind rushed towards him and wound up in his arms with bright giggles.

A divine feeling was bubbling in Hiccup's heart. Zephyr. The fragrance of felicity tugged at the corners of his mouth. Zephyr. He turned around to look at Astrid. A beautiful fantasy hatched in his head. A little girl, running around and giggling just like the wind did. The warmth in his eyes was brimming over. The sunshine gave him a big hug and dissolved into the air around him. He stood there for a while in a glowing halo. Then he walked back to Astrid. The warm sunlight enveloped her, dancing on her hair. It held its cheeks in its little palms and watched her curiously.

Hiccup chuckled. That daydream's getting a little too real. He took his seat. Her hands were warm, in a good way though. It was reassuring, that she was going to be fine, literally fine. Hiccup knew better than anyone that in most of the situations she said 'I'm fine', there was a really big chance that she was not. She was just too stubborn to show her vulnerabilities in front of their friends. He wanted to spoil her, make her happy, and keep her safe. He wanted to wake up next to her, make her breakfast, keep her company so she would never have to be all alone in front of, well, the whole world--he closed his eyes. Everything added up to himself in the end. It always did, sliding fast to a heap of uncertain, unsettling nervousness. In an entire second before that, Hiccup always felt like he could foresee it. But the deadly part of this prophecy was that he couldn't control where it went. He just watched and hopelessly waited for the tiny ship of his mind to crash into an iceberg. Lately, this was his daily routine. He would never escape this devastating cycle of exhaustion. Part of him didn't even want to. It almost seemed like his own punishment. It haunted him for so long that it gradually became somewhat like a habit. He couldn't live without it. Whenever he wasn't feeling it temporarily, his mind started looking for it automatically. He couldn't control it. It just happened. He would fall into this dark swirl and lost his way. It could cost him such a long time to drag himself out of there and focus on the real world in front of him. He grabbed Astrid's hand to keep himself from falling into that abyss. He forced his focus onto her face, desperately trying to memorize the shimmering light on it. He got a little scared, that he was going to tumble into a cold swamp and sink to the endless bottom. At first, it was not like he was blaming himself for everything, but then it transformed into a chaotic storm of merciless accusations that trapped him inside. He was worried about nothing and suddenly he was worried about everything. He couldn't tell what exactly that "everything" was and didn't know what he was doing. He lost track of what he was panicking about. Not again. It was a mess and he got bludgeoned by it.

This same crash-and-burn had happened so many times in these two days. It just wouldn't leave him alone.

Toothless had been inside for a while. He decided to sneak in and maybe check on Astrid since Hiccup left the door open. He thought he smelled tension, the desperate kind, which didn't smell like Hiccup. It confused him. He traced it carefully and still ended up right behind his friend. It got a little scary for him. He warbled and nudged Hiccup's side with his nose nervously. It looked like Hiccup got woken up from the worst nightmare. His eyes flashed open in high alert. The alarm deflated when the dragon's big eyes appeared in sight.

"I…I'm alright." Hiccup felt a little detached from his voice. "Don't worry. ''

Hiccup was so grateful that his dragon knocked him out of the silent maze he was lost in. He needed distractions. But he wasn't sure if those would help at all because all the distractions in the world couldn't seem to keep him occupied for more than a minute. His nerves that lurked in the back of his mind would constantly whisper to him and remind him of his panic. He tried to ignore them, of course, but that wasn't very helpful, either. He would still get reeled back into that black hole within seconds. Toothless' forehead wrinkled as he tentatively tried to look into his rider's eyes. His eyebrows—where they usually should be except that he didn't have any--looked like a V upside-down, which Hiccup always found funny. He cooed and squeezed his big head onto Hiccup's laps under his arm. Hiccup sighed. He patted his dragon, feeling overwhelmed. It was impossible to shake off that deadly, suffocating weight right in his chest. He was almost getting afraid that he might be stuck with it for the rest of his life.

He didn't know how to describe it. He wanted to talk to Toothless. He didn't care if he would understand. It was just that he didn't know how to define it. What is wrong with me? He heard a playful voice in his head. It was Astrid's. A cup of exhaustion mixed with a tablespoon of fear and a few drops of, I don't know, desperation extract… equals you? And maybe a sad aftertaste of confusion and soberness that wouldn't let you go? There was a small laugh. I know what it feels like. I always do. The side effects of danger, if you ask me.

The light that was sitting next to him watched him quietly. It looked concerned, too. It reached out its small, glowing hands and patted Hiccup's. Hiccup felt it. It felt so real. Warm and gentle. Even Toothless seemed to feel it, snuffling in its direction. There was a poof. And it disappeared. Hiccup already gave up trying to figure out what was with all the things he could see and hear. Maybe they were all my hallucinations. Or not. He couldn't afford the effort to think about them. But the good thing was, her voice calmed him down. Now he was so busy carving what she said into his brains that he miraculously forgot about the trap he set for himself. He usually could realize it, after a while, that something was keeping him from that trap. But not this time, surprisingly. Her voice always made him feel safe.

"Ah!!" there was a loud crash outside followed by a curse, "Stupid dragon!"

"Hiccup?" Snotlout asked, his voice like a thief asking his cohort not to wake up the vicious guard dragon. If it wasn't for his high-pitched scream before, Hiccup probably wouldn't hear him at all.

"You know you can walk right in, Snotlout." Hiccup chuckled. This unusual Snotlout was amusing.

Snotlout tiptoed in, looking nervous. Hiccup couldn't figure out what he was nervous about. It was the middle of the day. He didn't need to worry about waking anyone up at all.

"Hey." Snotlout came up with one word after standing at the door for almost like a minute.

"Anything I can help you with?" Hiccup pinched the bridge of his nose, thousands of possible disasters involving Snotlout and the twins flashing through his mind.

"Nothing." The guy said quickly. "Just came by to say hi. And, uh, how's your leg?" The last part seemed to have some trouble getting off of his tongue.

Wow, first time without any mess I need to clean up. Hiccup thought to himself. " Great." He replied, a little rigid. He wasn't used to Snotlout acting so…considerate. "It's very nice of you to ask."

They each remained in their spots for a while. It was getting awkward. Finally, Hiccup broke the silence. "You wanna come in?"

Snotlout immediately grasped at the straw. "No, I'm good." He looked relieved getting an opportunity to get out of here. "I'm just about to go…help with…something." He turned around, ready to leave, and then turned back again as if remembering something. "Lunch?"

"Yeah, sure." Said Hiccup. This is all too weird, considering what Snotlout usually was like. Hiccup tried to sound more natural. "So, uh, Ruff is the chef today?"

"No." Snotlout finally got to a point between "normal" and "weird". "Fishlegs is cooking today. At least something that doesn't taste like rotten fish." His eyes suddenly widened. " Oh my Thor is that what she put in her casserole?"

Hiccup chuckled again. Now that's the normal Snotlout. "Just save me some of, well, whatever is available. I'm gonna stay here."

"No problem. I'll get you some right now." Snotlout jumped on his saddle and flew away. "In a minute!"

Fishlegs did do better at cooking. Most of the time it was him and Hiccup who took turns preparing food for everybody. The twins would think of countless ways of creating the uncanniest combinations of food in the world, and Snotlout was just disgusting tossing everything he had in his hand into the pot, sometimes including the dirt he unconsciously pulled off of his boots, and Astrid, whose cooking could actually poison someone, was always coaxed away from the kitchen by her boyfriend. It was obvious why everybody was so happy every time Heather was around.

Hiccup yawned. That all-nighter started to catch up on him. He checked on Astrid once more. She still looked fine as she had been in a while, so he decided to take a short nap. He just bent over the edge of the bed and laid his head on his arms. It didn't take more than a minute for him to fall asleep.

--

Astrid found herself in glowing warmth. The space around her flowed in an amber light, like a jar of honey. She looked around, eyes following the cheerful light. There was this tiny, sweet laughter filling up the space that made everything feel like a summer afternoon. Astrid tried to locate it, but it danced around and was mischievously hard to catch. So she gave up, just standing there, with a smile on her face.

Then it hit her. It jumped into her arms with faint giggles and Astrid felt something stumble and fall into her heart. Warmth filled her chest. Then she saw something. It clung to her heart and hugged it. And it had Hiccup's smile.

The amber glow slowly came together, into the form of a little kid. It held Astrid's hand. Astrid felt it. Small, joyful, and shy. She let it lead her way. They walked on the shimmering softness of the light toward a halo at the end of the space around them.

The little buddy scampered happily, making Astrid's arm swing with its. Something bubbled in her heart. What is it? She found it hard to name it. She dug so many words out of her head, trying to define it, or at least describe it. And finally, she reached the bottom and saw the right one.

Beautiful. It's beautiful.

They reached the end. The halo was right in front of them. The small figure stopped. It giggled shyly, then disappeared. Astrid looked back one last time and stepped into the halo.

--

Well, it's getting a little sci-fi.

I don't know why I plot it this way. The idea feels so natural to me. And it turned out so cute!!

Think of it as a little angel trying to find itself a perfect family? So it can have the parents it likes when it wants to come down from heaven?

Enjoy!