Author's Note:

I am so, so, so sorry this is ridiculously late in updating. I had some writer's block/depression that zapped a lot of my creative energy. I've gotten caught up with Supernatural and have seen the last episodes. SPOILER WARNING: I'm still deciding where I want this story to diverge from the series, but until I write a flashback or something to explain in detail, assume that instead of destroying Chuck's powers, Jack is simply more his equal which has been keeping Chuck "in-line".

Disclaimer:

I don't own the characters of Supernatural, only the OCs.

Chapter 16: Memories

Castiel stood frozen for a moment as he watched his best friends abandon him. He enjoyed the idea of being "Uncle Cass" but he was also very unsure of himself alone with the two of them. Nephilim were very powerful when they wanted to be and he was acutely aware that these two were what humans considered cute. He wasn't entirely sure how susceptible he'd be to that quality.

"Uncle Cass?" Gracie's voice broke through Castiel's thoughts and he turned to her.

"Yes?" he asked, hoping it wasn't a complicated question. Children often asked complicated questions.

Gracie walked over to the sink and put her plate in it. "What do you want me an' Jack-Jack to do?" she asked.

Castiel had to think for a moment. He knew he could prepare for a hunting trip on his own, but he wasn't sure how to adjust for the presence of the nehiplim. "Can you wash your dishes?" he asked.

Gracie nodded and then frowned. "As long as the water doesn't have to be too, too hot," she said. Then she grinned. "It'll be like they do on T.V! C'mon, Jack-Jack, I'll wash and you dry." With that, Gracie was pulling out the step stool and starting to run the water.

Castiel watched her carefully. "Don't fill the entire sink," he told her. "Just use enough water to wash your dishes and your cups."

Jack joined Gracie at the sink and nodded to Castiel. "We'll do it perfectly," he promised confidently.

"Alright," Castiel agreed. "After you're done with that chore, go to your rooms and put clothes in your suitcases. Dean said three or four days worth."

"Got it, Uncle Cass," Gracie agreed as she squeezed some soap onto the dish sponge. It looked like a lot of soap, but it was too late to stop her so Cass let it go.

"Where are our suitcases?" Jack asked curiously as he got out a fresh towel from the drawer.

"Sam put yours on your bed," Cass told him. "I believe Dean put yours out as well, Gracie."

Gracie just nodded, focused on scrubbing the dish. It seemed like overkill since they'd only had toast. The dishes weren't covered in grease or a sticky sauce. He didn't want to be discouraging, though, so he didn't say anything.

"I'm going to start packing supplies," he told them. "When you're done packing your clothes, play quietly and try not to make a mess." With that, he left the two of them to their chore. He went first to the supply room and started pulling out the basic ingredients for various magickal effects including exorcisms. He and Dean had talked about the evidence available online and Dean was fairly certain it was a vengeful spirit, but Cass liked to be prepared for a variety of spellwork and rituals. He took the ingredients and headed out to the garage.

Dean and Sam had gone house hunting in Sam's new truck so that Cass could pack the Impala. He popped the trunk and opened the compartment specially added to hold such ingredients. As he was methodically putting them away he sensed someone enter the garage.

"Uncle Cass, which toys can we bring?" Gracie called to him.

Cass stopped and leaned around the trunk's lid to look at her. "I'm not sure," he answered honestly. "What do you usually take on hunting trips?"

Gracie frowned. "Small stuff," she told him. "And coloring books."

"Then you should bring that," he told her. He trusted that the other world's Dean had been selective about toys for a good reason.

"Can't I bring Rapunzel and Flynn?" Gracie asked hopefully.

"Can I bring my animals?" Jack asked, poking his head into the room as well.

Castiel felt torn. On one hand he wanted to tell the children they could bring whatever they wanted. Having happy children around seemed like the best goal and toys certainly seemed to make them happy. On the other than, he knew there wasn't enough room in the impala or the truck to bring all of their toys. It also didn't seem practical if they were only going to be gone for a few days.

He closed up the arrowroot container and joined his young charges at the door. "I believe it would be alright to bring whatever will fit in your backpacks."

Gracie grinned. "I bet I can fit a ton in there!" she declared and turned to head back down the stairs. "C'mon, Jack-Jack, let's see how much we can take!"

"Okay!" Jack agreed enthusiastically and turned to follow her down the stairs.

Castiel sighed, realizing Dean and Sam wouldn't want them running in the bunker. "Do not run, please." he said.

Gracie stopped at the bottom of the stairs and looked up at him. "Didn't Daddy want us to hurry?"

Castiel nodded. "But you know how he feels about safety," he reminded her. "I believe the rules still apply even when he's not here."

Gracie frowned, clearly disappointed. "Okay, we'll walk," she agreed and led Jack back into the dormitory wing.

Once they were out of sight, Castiel let out a relieved sigh. He was worried she'd challenge his authority and he didn't really know how he would handle that. It felt odd giving Michael's child instructions. Michael had given him permission, though. During their debrief after the Brigite incident, Michael had been adamant that Castiel would need to be an authority figure for Gracie so she should trust and obey him without hesitation. Michael hadn't said anything in particular, but it had been clear the incident in Sioux Falls made him extremely nervous about Gracie's safety. They still hadn't tracked Brigite down, and that was making the archangel cranky.

Castiel finished packing the car with supplies and then went to the library to collect a few books they might want access to while on the road. As he was selecting a tome that Sam often used for reference, he suddenly felt light-headed. His vision started to blacken from the outsides in. He was reaching for his phone to call Dean or Sam when it felt like a boulder landed on him and everything went black.

It felt like a moment or two later when he heard Gracie's voice from somewhere very far away.

"Daddy, he won't wake up!" she was saying in a panicked voice.

"Ask my dad if this is an emergency," Jack told her insistently.

"It is not an emergency," Castiel managed to croak out as he opened his eyes.

He was on the floor, flat on his back, and the two children were bent over him. Gracie looked pale and terrified.

"Daddy, he's awake!" she exclaimed, relief evident in her voice. She threw her arms around his neck and held on tightly. "Are you okay, Uncle Cass?"

"Cass?" Dean's rough voice could be heard through the phone in her hand – Cass's phone.

Cass gently prodded it out of her grip and held it to his ear. "I'm alright, Dean," he said as he sat up, Gracie still attached to him. He got a good look at Jack and saw the boy looked almost as terrified as Gracie. He might have been on the verge of crying.

"What the hell happened?" Dean asked.

"I'm not sure," Cass answered honestly. "If I were a human I'd say I fainted. But I am not and I don't faint."

There was a short silence from the phone. "We're on our way back, probably five more minutes," Dean said. "Just sit tight and don't do anything strenuous until we get there."

"I'm fine Dean, " Cass told him firmly. "I'll finish packing for the trip. We'll see you when you get back." With that, he hung up the phone. He knew it was abrupt, but he wanted to be clear that he was fine. He certainly didn't want Sam and Dean to think he couldn't handle a simple bout of babysitting.

"We thought you were attacked or something," Jack told him quietly.

Cass got to his feet cautiously, but genuinely felt normal. "I'm sorry," he told the children. "I'm not sure what happened, but I wasn't attacked."

"Are you sick?" Gracie suggested.

"Angels don't get sick," Jack refuted.

Cass shook his head in agreement. "No, we don't." Slowly, though, Cass began to realize that he had new information in his head. When he looked at Gracie he felt a bit different, like he knew her better. "Your favorite animal is a dolphin or a beluga whale," he told her, surprised that he knew that. They'd asked her a lot about her favorites in the days since she'd arrived, but somehow they'd never gotten around to animals.

Gracie nodded, also looking a bit surprised.

He turned and took Jack in. He was momentarily struck with immense grief as he saw Jack, adult Jack, consumed by Amara. "What the . . ."

Jack looked confused and a little afraid. "What? Is something wrong with me?"

Cass closed his eyes again and shook his head. "I . . ." but he couldn't finish his thought because he was met with a vision of Sam in a hospital bed suffering from some sort of illness, and again, he was hit with a deep, penetrating pang of grief.

Then he saw, or rather felt, himself caught up in a battle with Dean. They were fighting demons. There were air raid sirens in the background. Three demons got a hold of Dean and Cass tried to get to him, but there was suddenly a white hot, searing pain in Cass's chest. He was in so much pain, he could swear there was an actual angel blade sticking out of him. He even looked down to verify that he was imagining things.

"Something's wrong," Gracie asserted with a frown and reached for Cass's phone.

He pulled it away, though, shaking his head. "I'm alright," he assured them again. He shook his head, trying to shake off the images he'd seen and the pain he'd felt, the pain which was ebbing as quickly as it had come upon him. "I'm just getting a lot of . . . visions?" He wasn't sure what he was seeing, but it was more than a little overwhelming. Gracie was only going to call Dean again, though, and there was nothing he could do as long as they were still on the road.

"You're seeing the memories of the other Castiel," a voice said calmly from behind him. He turned and saw Michael standing in the foyer of the bunker.

"Papa Michael!" Gracie squealed happily. She ran to him and wrapped her arms around his waist.

To Castiel's surprise, Michael returned the hug, albeit very briefly. "My daughter."

"Castiel's sick or something," she insisted, taking Michael's hand and dragging him towards Castiel.

Michael allowed himself to be taken to Castiel, but he shook his head. "He's not sick, Grace. He's getting memories – memories that your Castiel had."

Castiel was confused and then he remembered what Michael had said about how he'd learned about Gracie's existence. He looked suddenly at Michael with alarm. "Does that mean . . .?"

"Yes," Michael agreed with a nod.

"What about Dean?" Castiel wondered with a little worry. "Will he experience this as well?"

Michael frowned and shook his head. "I don't think so. Humans don't appear to be affected the same way."

Jack frowned. "Why didn't Uncle Cass feel it when Chuck killed the other worlds and the other Castiels?" he asked skeptically. The little boy seemed to have picked up on what was happening and looked worried.

"Good question," Castiel agreed, looking to his Captain for an explanation.

Michael gave a bit of a shrug. "I think you may have, just not as strongly. I've been wondering the same thing about my own experiences. I think we feel the changes from that world so acutely because it is so similar to this one. The divergence was really only a few decisions wide," he explained. "Otherwise they were twin worlds – so close that Father didn't destroy it with all the others during his rage."

Castiel had so much to process but Michael's presence was more pressing. "Did you need me for something?" he asked, allowing himself to settle into the old, comfortable feeling of serving Michael that he'd known for millennia. He wasn't going to follow blindly again, but so far, their interests paralleled and so far it wasn't too bad being on Michael's team again.

Michael shook his head, the faintest smile on his face. "I appreciate that you're so eager, Castiel. Truly, but I'm here to answer your questions and make sure nothing takes advantage of the situation. When I realized it was happening, I thought you might be affected and might need assistance."

Castiel blinked in surprise. That was not like Michael. Castiel assisted him as needed, not the other way around.

Michael seemed to read into Castiel's uncomfortable surprise and chuckled a little. "I'm trying out a new management style," he said with a casual shrug. "We'll see how it goes."

"I don't get it," Gracie finally said with a pout.

Michael and Cass exchanged a look and mutually decided not to tell her what triggered Cass's blackout.

Unfortunately, Jack didn't seem to get the message. "Your other world got destroyed," he told her bluntly. "And the other Cass died so now our Cass is getting all his memories." It wasn't a taunting delivery of the facts, but in true Jack style, it was a simple, emotionless report.

"Jack . . ." Castiel said, trying to stop the boy from crushing his cousin with this revelation, but when Castiel turned to Gracie it was obvious the damage was already done.

Gracie's mouth hung open in mortified shock. She looked at Castiel and then up at Michael and back to Castiel. "You died?" she cried in disbelief.

Michael squat down in front of her and shook his head. "Grace, listen to me," he said firmly, but with kindness. "This is why you're here now. Dean and Cass sent you here because they weren't going to live very much longer, remember?"

Gracie's horrified shock melted into sobs. "No, no, they're still there!" she argued.

Castiel was at a loss. He'd seen Dean comfort her plenty of times since she'd arrived, but he didn't feel equipped to do it himself. He peripherally knew that his other self would have been able to help at least a little, but he wasn't confident he could be anything close to a Dean substitute yet. He hoped Michael would know what to do, as her other father.

"Grace, calm down," Michael tried, but his voice didn't carry the same weight that Dean's did. Castiel could tell it wouldn't be enough.

She was inconsolable. "Take me home," she demanded. "I want to go home right now."

Castiel joined Michael and bent down to Gracie's level. "This is your home now," he reminded her as gently as possible. "Remember?"

"But Daddy's hurt," she told them. "Like Uncle Sam!"

Michael shook his head. "Dean, the other Dean died very quickly. He didn't hurt," he promised, although based on what Cass saw he wasn't sure if it was entirely true.

"Your new Dean is just fine. He's on his way here. He'll be here any minute," Cass added.

"I'm sorry," Jack squeaked from behind them.

Cass turned to see that the little boy was crying and crumpling the hem of his t-shirt in his hands with worry.

"I didn't mean to make her cry," he added before turning and fleeing down the dormitory hallway.

"Cass?" came Dean's thunderous voice as the door to the garage opened.

"We're down here," Cass called up.

Dean ran down the stairs two or three at a time. "What's going on? What happened?" he asked with an angry frown as he saw Gracie in hysterics.

"Perhaps you should do the Daddy thing," Michael suggested, standing up and giving Dean room.

Dean didn't wait for any additional explanation and scooped his daughter into his arms. "Hey, hey, Little Bit. What's wrong? Tell Daddy what's wrong."

"Cass, where's Jack?" Sam asked, clearly a little worried at his son's absence from the rest of the group.

"He ran off to his bedroom, I expect," Cass reported. "He realized he told Gracie something upsetting and then got upset as well."

Sam nodded. "Got it." He headed down the dormitory hall his son had just fled to.

Cass sighed, feeling that this simple baby-sitting episode had somehow spiraled out of control. He turned back to Dean and Gracie as Dean was rocking her back and forth in his arms.

"Baby girl, it's okay," Dean said softly in her ear. "Cass and I are right here. And now Cass is like 2 Casses in one." Evidently Michael had given him the short version.

Cass wasn't sure he'd describe it that way, but if it would help calm Gracie, he was willing to play along.

For her part, Gracie continued to cry, clinging to Dean's neck with all her might.

Michael looked a little sad which was an expression Cass had never seen on his face before – any of his faces – ever.

They both backed away from the father and daughter, opting to let Dean do the comforting thing. It seemed to Castiel that he was getting pretty good at it. Gracie usually responded positively to his low, gentle voice.

Michael sighed. "I wish I could have that with her," he lamented quietly.

Cass frowned in confusion. "Have what?"

"I wish I could be comforting to her, but that is not in my nature. She wouldn't feel my love for her."

"Do you love her?" Cass asked, surprising himself with such a bold question to Michael.

Michael frowned and thought for a moment. "I'm not sure I know what love is exactly," he told Cass. "I know what it looks like, but I do not know what it feels like. I have affection for her. I would move Heaven, Earth, and Hell to protect her." He paused. "But is that love for her or just a possessiveness of what I made? I just don't know."

Castiel nodded. He'd gone through a similar questioning of his own feelings for the significant people in his life. "Love is complex," was all he could offer.

"Uncle Cass?" he heard a little voice ask and Castiel realized the crying had subsided into pitiful, hiccupping sobs.

"Yes, Gracie?" he asked, taking a step toward her and Dean.

"You're okay, right?"

Cass nodded confidently. "Very okay," he promised. "And your dad is right, now I have memories of the other Cass so it will be like he's here too."

"You do?" she asked, clearly a little skeptical.

"I do," he replied and tried to come up with memories he could use to prove it to her. "I remember going to the diner to have waffles on Saturdays. I remember you drawing with sidewalk chalk at the park across the street from the diner. I even remember sending you through the rift to this world."

Gracie continued to calm down slowly.

"Do you remember?" she asked Dean hopefully.

Dean shook his head. "Not right now," he told her apologetically. "But I'm learning just as fast as I can. I'll get the pigtails figured out before you know it."

Cass grabbed a box of tissues from one of the reading tables and offered it to Gracie.

"You promise he didn't hurt?" she asked Michael as she took one of the tissues from the box.

"It was very quick," Michael reiterated. "Not like Uncle Sam at all."

Gracie took a big deep breath and let it out slowly. "I'm tired of sad stuff," she told them with a little pout.

Dean laughed and hugged her. "I'll bet you are, Little Bit. And we're going to try to keep the sad stuff to a minimum from now on, okay?"

She nodded and wiped her face with the tissue.

"Ahem."

Cass turned to see Sam standing just inside the library with Jack on his hip. Jack looked miserable.

"Jack would like to say something to Gracie," Sam explained, and gently bounced Jack to prod him into talking.

Jack took a deep breath. "I'm sorry I made you cry, Gracie. I didn't mean to tell you that stuff."

Gracie nodded. "It's okay," she told him before laying her head on Dean's shoulder.

Dean gave her another tight squeeze and then set her on her feet. "Go splash some water on your face and then bring your suitcase and backpack to the bottom of the stairs," he told her gently.

"I wanna stay with you," she whined a little.

Dean smiled and kissed her nose. "We're going to have a whole car ride to hang out together," he told her. "Now scoot." He pointed her towards the dormitory stairs and gave her a gentle swat to the seat of her pants.

"Okay," she agreed grudgingly.

As she passed Sam and Jack, Sam set Jack on his feet. "You too," he instructed gently.

Gracie reached out for Jack's hand and they disappeared down the dormitory hallway together.

Sam joined the three of them with a deep sigh. "Not even lunch time and there's already been some exciting drama today," he said.

Dean nodded, frowning. "You sure you're okay, Cass?" he asked with worry.

"Yes," Cass answered confidently. "But I know why Gracie was so preoccupied with Sam's health yesterday."

Sam and Dean raised a questioning eyebrow simultaneously.

"I saw the other Sam in a hospital bed, very ill. I remember now that he was the victim of a spell I couldn't heal. Jack had already been killed by Amara, so there was nothing any of us could do." As Cass explained, he felt the echo of grief again. At least it wasn't as overwhelming as before. "That's how Sam died in the other world."

Sam and Dean looked at each other for a moment and Cass could see Dean set his jaw.

"There is no reason to believe that is how he will die in this world," Michael said calmly. "Here, that moment in time has come and gone. Jack and I are still alive and in the equation. Jack is even stronger now than he was when the other Jack was consumed by Amara."

Sam nodded slowly. "Well I guess that's a little reassuring."

"A little," Dean agreed with a frown.

There was a pregnant silence that Michael finally broke. "I only came to help Castiel with the surge of memories and protect the children while you were away," he explained to Sam and Dean. "I think I'll be going now. Heaven is a complex entity and I shouldn't be away too long."

"Are you acting as God now?" Dean challenged, clearly still in a defensive mood. He always got like that when he thought a loved one was in danger.

Michael smirked. "Definitely not. I'm just in charge of the angels until the new God arrives. Father's available for emergencies, but he's definitely an outgoing CEO as it were."

"New god?" Sam asked.

Michael just smiled at them. "In time."

And in the blink of eye and rush of air from angel wings, Michael was gone.

"Well that was enigmatic," Dean said shaking his head.

"Very," Sam agreed.

Cass heard the sound of something rolling down the hall and looked over to see the children emerge into the bunker's foyer. They each had an overstuffed backpack and were rolling their suitcases behind them. The suitcases also seemed overstuffed. In their free hands, they each carried a teddy bear they'd made in Sioux Falls.

Dean laughed. "Three or four days, kids," he said walking over to them. "Not years."

"Uncle Cass said we could bring whatever would fit in our backpacks," Gracie explained.

Jack nodded. "We made a lot fit."

Dean, Sam, and Cass all laughed and the tension felt like it had finally broken. They loaded up the truck with the bags and, after a bit of arguing about being split into different vehicles, got the kids settled in their booster seats. Cass joined Dean and Gracie in the Impala and they were finally on the road to Texas.