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BlerBlerBler [chapter 1]: Glad you're loving it! Many funny situations coming up.
elder441 [chapter 1]: I'm back to uploading on FF, hopefully, no more issues stopping me from posting.
CalvinHobbesGatsby [chapter 1]: Glad you do! Thank you!
Norevic Maghinay [chapter 1]: Yes, a new story for you all! And awh! I've got crazy guy friends, but they're all taken and I could never ask them to be my baby daddy if this happens to me haha.
"When I told you that I loved you..."
Mary places the dish of spaghetti down in the middle of the table, looking up at the blonde. "You've told me that many times," she says, turning to grab the bowl of tomato sauce as he places their plates and cutlery down.
"No, when you were sick," Francis corrects himself.
Mary purses her lips, furrowing her brows. She can't remember much, she was in a lot of pain, her body was overcome with the flu, she felt awful. Francis even had to remind her that he wasn't the father of Olivia's unborn baby.
She turns to him. "Sorry, I don't quite remember. Kenna hooked me up on the good stuff. Night Nurse and Lemsip," she replies, taking a seat.
Francis smiles wryly and takes a seat across from her, reaching to get the serving spoon for the spaghetti but she gets there first, their hands touching. "You first," he says.
She blushes and nods, serving spaghetti onto her plate. "Thanks," she replies. "Anyway, you were saying?"
He takes the spoon from her hand and serves himself. "I told you that I loved you. And you asked me in what way and I told you to think about it."
"Right," Mary says shakily, meeting his blue eyes.
"Well?"
"Well, what?"
Francis sighs heavily. "How do you think I meant it, Mary?"
Mary spoons some sauce onto her spaghetti and bites her lip. She knows he's trying to press her into revealing that she's always loved him and he's always loved her but it feels weird, somehow. Like it's new and raw and their relationship is never going to be the same again. That terrifies her.
"I love you like that too," Mary whispers. "We have to take things slowly-"
"Why?"
"Because we're best friends and jumping into a romantical relationship could ruin everything! We don't know each other like that, we've known each other for twenty-five years and we've never... changed our relationship. Even when we had sex in uni, we'd shove it under the carpet and laugh about it," she tells him. "And now, we're trying for a baby which may or may not be a thing-why did you take ages to produce the sample?"
Francis lets out an exasperated breath. She's changing the subject but she has a point. "I was uninspired, Mary."
"Why?"
"You know when you proposed the idea in the first place?" He asks softly, seeing her a nod a little. "I sobered up and wanted to take you upstairs and have my way with you so we could skip all of this IUI thing but I played it off. I've never felt anything this strong for any other woman than you, Mary. Even the women between the times I got back with Olivia, I'd choose black-haired girls, brown-eyed girls and imagine they were you."
"Francis..." Mary breathes out, eyes wide.
"And then Olivia is the opposite. She's blonde, blue-eyed, high-maintenance. And I thought you wouldn't want me so I went for her. Although she's not the only blonde I've been with... but I sure do have a type. You."
Mary bows her head, not hungry anymore. "Why were you uninspired?"
Francis chuckles wryly. "Because even though I tried to imagine you in order to give the sample... I realised I didn't want to put it in a tube. I wanted to put it in the host, herself."
Mary almost chokes on air. She thinks about Kenna's explicit remarks and starts sputtering, alarming Francis as he hurries to pour her a glass of water. What is with the people around her being so crude?! She is but in texts and stuff like that but speaking face to face where they can react to her words upfront? She wishes the world will swallow her up because those kinds of things might not go down well at times.
She gulps the glass down and feels Josie curl around her leg for comfort. "I'm good."
"Sorry, was I too honest?"
"No, just th-the right amount," she replies, laughing a little which sets him off too. "Wow. Wasn't what I expected to hear."
Francis smirks. "What do you think about that?"
Mary bites her lip. "We should still... take things slow. To adjust. This is all too quick for me considering I've been hurt before."
"I understand. You know I'm not like-"
"I know exactly the kind of man you are and I love you for it, Francis," Mary says fondly. "Let's wait. I can't deal with too much right now, so we'll focus on the baby and then see where that goes."
Francis nods and pours some sauce onto his spaghetti. "Okay. We'll see how this goes."
...
The day before the blood test, Mary gets her period, and if she said she wasn't hurt finding out, she'd be lying. She knows it will take a process, her body has to do its natural work but it makes her feel so small and weak. This one thing she wants, she can't do it. She's always been able to do the things she wanted but now, it's just getting more and more hurtful.
"You'd never know. I think Leeza got her period when she was pregnant with Bella," Francis tries to assure her when she's locked herself in the bathroom, sobbing. "It was only the first month and she was fine throughout."
"I'm tired, Francis. I just want a baby," she tells him.
"I know, Mary."
"I want to give you a baby."
"I know," he says softly. "But Mary, it's not the end of the world. This doesn't mean you won't get pregnant. We can try again next month and I'm sure Dr Diaz will have some advice for you."
Mary sniffles. "I don't think going in for the test tomorrow would prove fruitful-"
"Mary, go. I'll even call him for you and you can talk to him. Would you like that?"
She lets out a puff of air and sighs. "Yeah, go on."
After speaking with Dr Diaz, he still advises her to come tomorrow, just in case Francis was right. That gives her a little hope, but she is already planning for the third cycle which is days before she and Francis go to France.
"My mother's preparing a buffet for the Christmas party," Francis tells her. "She wants you to be a host after finding out you're coming."
Mary pads into her bedroom, which has suddenly become theirs because the habit of sleeping together has now come into play, and she strangely doesn't feel anything strange or excited about it. They've always tended to share beds, sometimes for sexual reasons, others strictly innocent.
"She will even put forward money to buy a whole new outfit. We all must match," he continues.
Mary turns to face him. "I'm not even fam-"
"You've known us for twenty-five years, I think you're more than family," Francis cuts her off knowingly. "So, what do you say? We can get some great food and dance and let loose for Christmas at my family's expense."
She chuckles. It's cheered her up, alright. "Go on, then," she replies.
"I'll let her know you're coming and start arranging for a cat hotel for Josie to go to," he says. "I don't want to risk her throwing up everywhere all over again."
Just before he goes, she calls him and sighs. "If I don't ever get pregnant, what will happen to us?"
Francis frowns. "In what way?"
"Like, you want a kid just as much as I do. If I can't give it to you, Francis, where would that put us?" She asks him.
Francis walks up to her, cups her cheeks and presses a soft kiss on her forehead. "I'd rather have you than not at all," he whispers. "I'm not flushing two decades of loving you down any drain, children or not. Don't worry about it. We are going to have a baby, Mary. I promise you."
She looks up at him with watery eyes. "You can't promise that."
"I can and I have. Now, get some rest, I'll sort dinner out and call you when it's done," he replies.
"Okay."
...
"...try for a third cycle. The test came up as negative," Dr Diaz said. "Do you wish to try for another cycle or do you want to take a breather or stop the process overall?"
"We can go for a third go," Mary says quietly.
Dr Diaz nods. "We have therapy if you need it."
"Not this time. I knew it would take a good few cycles," she says, giving Francis a quick smile.
"What you are feeling is completely normal but don't forget your chances of getting pregnant increase with each cycle done," Dr Diaz reminds her.
She nods and smiles widely. "I know and I'm ready to try again. It was just a little shock as last time, my period hadn't started until after the blood test so... I'm okay, honestly and I'm rearing and ready to prepare for my next cycle."
"Okay," Dr Diaz smiles before continuing with her appointment and letting them go when it's finished.
They decide to make a stop at the supermarket to grab some stuff for dinner and to let Mary walk off her blues by selecting chocolate-filled doughnuts and chocolate chip cookies for dessert with Ben & Jerry's ice cream.
"We should probably start eating healthier," Francis laughs when she puts three different flavours into the trolley.
Mary grins. "We do! This is just to cheer me up."
"Yeah, cheer you up," Francis snorts. "I'm not dealing with your sugar rush, Marie."
"Don't use my government name!"
"You use mine."
"Yeah, when you annoy the shit out of me," she replies, coming to stand beside him and poke his nose.
Biting his lip, Francis eyes her own lips. "Why don't you say that right to my face?"
Mary narrows her eyes knowingly before moving in and quickly turning at the last second when she catches a glimpse of rocket ice lollies. "I loved these as a kid! Mum would complain whenever I let them melt."
"This is way too much ice cream for almost Winter," Francis laughs, blushing at their earlier moment.
Mary shrugs. "I don't play by the rules, Francis. You know this."
"You so do."
"Yeah, but when it comes to ice cream, hell no!"
They laugh and stop by the alcohol aisle to grab some sweet wine for Francis and another bottle for Claude as it's her birthday soon and they probably should see her and arrange plans.
"I wish I could drink," Mary mumbles, eyeing Francis put the bottles into the trolley. "But I don't want to risk anything."
"Even when you do get pregnant and have the baby, you still probably won't be drinking for a good amount of time," Francis replies.
Mary furrows her brows. "In what sense?"
"You will... breastfeed... right?"
It dawns on Mary and she glances down at her moderately average breasts. "I've never ever thought about a baby breastfeeding from me," she says, eyes wide. "Wow. I wonder how that will feel."
Francis chuckles. "You've got friends to ask," he reminds her.
"Thank God," she replies, eyeing the second floor. "Hey, let's go upstairs. I need some gloves, I keep losing the ones I have."
Scanning through the endless options for gloves, Mary sees the baby section from the corner of her eye and bites her lip. She chooses a pair of black, leather gloves and looks around for Francis, spotting him heading into the books section.
Curious, she heads to the baby section and starts looking through the baby clothes from pinks to blues to neutral colours and she imagines herself and Francis selecting and choosing the cutest ones for their baby. She's about to go but she finds an onesie that says 'Mummy's Little Star' and she can't help the 'awh' that comes out of her mouth as she takes it.
She decides to take it.
She might as well start somewhere, right? She needs to prepare for a baby, it's going to happen any month now and it's good to start small. Engage the brain into positive thinking to make it real. She can feel it, despite her period being a setback, she still knows that she will get her baby. It's a matter of when.
"All done?" She asks Francis who has picked two hardcover books.
"Yeah. Got these for light reading on the plane," he explains as they head back downstairs to checkout.
Mary snorts, eyeing the books. "'Light reading'," she scoffs. "Those could take me a week to read. I've not been able to do reading quickly since we were in secondary school."
"Yeah, having no time to spare is a pain in the arse as an adult," he replies.
When they start offloading their shopping onto the conveyor, Mary tells Francis that she forgot to get ketchup and asks him to grab a large bottle for them which he does dutifully as the cashier starts scanning their items. She quickly shoves the onesie to the front and the female middle-aged cashier smiles knowingly, scanning the outfit as Mary hurries to quickly bag it along with the snacks before continuing to offload the trolley.
By the time Francis returns, there is a quarter of shopping left to be scanned and Francis adds the ketchup at the end, seeing the cashier scanning another bottle.
"Oh, baby brain already?" He jests in kind, pointing to the ketchup she now puts in a shopping bag.
Mary chuckles, rolling her eyes. "I forgot, okay?" She laughs nervously as he comes around to help her.
That was close.