The Ultimatum

Mike in LA

"If you go back to ball, I'm out." Rachel grabbed her purse and car keys off the table. She was gripping her keys so tight I could see her knuckles turning white. But this didn't scare me. It also wasn't a surprise. I wasn't going to let her talk me out of it.

"Well, I don't know what to tell you Rach. Baseball is part of me. It's basically the only thing that has ever fulfilled me."

"Really?!" Rachel shot back.

Shit! That was not what I meant to say. She clutched her purse under her arm and whipped her hair as she turned and headed to the door. Her hands were shaking as she griped the doorknob. "Well, let me get out of your way! I'm soo sorry these last few years of your life have been soo underwhelming!"

"Rach!" I quickly made it to the door just as she began to open it. I closed the door leaving my palm against the frame preventing her from opening it again. She didn't let go of the doorknob and stood defensively with her eyes aimed anywhere but at me. "I don't mean it like that! I'm happy with you! It's being this old, retired car dealer. It's pathetic." I placed my hand over my chest. Hoping to covey to her that I'm speaking about my soul. "I need the game. Nothing has been able to fill that void. I can't turn down Coaching the Padres. This is saving me from a complete psychotic break."

Her eyes now sharply peer into mine. "No, Mike! Baseball consumes you. I absolutely do not want that life with you." Her thin lips tightened with each word as she spoke each word with hyper emphasis and precise articulation. "When you're in the game, you are nonexistent. Everyone on that team and all their problems get all of your time and attention." Her voice softened a little and her eyes dropped to our feet. "You don't even come home some nights. Every other player goes home to their wives and family. Not you." A tear feel as she returned her gaze with mine. "That God damn team is your family. So, what do you need me for?" I exhaled. I didn't even realize I was holding my breath. I was such an ass. She was right about every word. I put my team first every time. I thought she would have forgiven me by now. Now that we just spent the last two years together where she was always first. "You need to choose. A life with me or baseball."

I released the door. I stood there looking at the floor with my hands on my hips. Trying to digest what she just said to me. I can't believe she is giving me an ultimatum. I didn't want to lose her.

"Well, I guess I got my answer, Goodbye Mike." Rachel slammed the door and before I could put together a comprehensible thought, she was speeding out of our LA driveway.

I closed my eyes and took a deep breath. The sad part is how I wasn't surprised this had gone down the way it did. The only reason we were working out was because I retired from baseball and was able to be the shiny man on her arm for her reporter events. Rachel had become a real star on her LA talk show as a co-host on The Buzz. All I did, was check in on my dealerships and work on promoting. The last 2 years was everything she ever wanted. It was also the most boring years of my life. I could now see how it felt for her being a ball player's wife. She hated sitting in the stands listening to the MLB wives and their gossip. She desired to be out in the world reporting real news. Why couldn't she allow me to have that same passion with ball. I love Rachel. Do things have to be so impossible? It never really went back to normal after the divorce. Neither one of us opted to marry each other again. A committed relationship was a good enough title.

I picked up the phone and dialed Oscar. He was still the manager of the Padres. "Let's set this meeting up. Yes, I'll be in San Diego by Monday. I'll give you an answer by the end of the meeting.

Mike in San Diego

I dropped my bags in the doorway of my old house in San Diego. I never sold it as Rachel and I used it as a vacation home. It was also very convenient for short stays after checking in on my San Diego car lots.

Everything was still in place as if time never passed. Tall windows for walls. Black leather sofas and chairs. It was the opposite of the warm soft home Rachel had created for us. I stopped to think about why that may be. My cold minimalistic home. Most of my time here was when I was alone. Aside from the few weeks Ginny had spent here. I gazed out toward the pool where I had shared a deep long heated kiss with her. Something that often played over and over again in my mind. Shaking the image out of my head, I turned the tube on and immediately saw my picture with headlines. "Will Lawson be the new Coach for the Padres?" It was the talk of sports news.

Petco Stadium

"Mike! So good to see you again. I hope you're here to tell us good news." Oscar greeted me outside Petco Stadium. His smile beaming and his arms outstretched ready for a very anticipated pat on the shoulder of his favorite player.

"Yeah, yeah. Let's go over the terms." I downplayed.

After a lengthy negotiation of salary and prohibitions, I spread a big smile on my face and accepted the job.

"Good man!" Oscar praised as he eagerly shook my hand." It's going to be the best decade yet. I feel a world series brewing. But first," Oscar reached down below his desk and pulled out a gift bag. "Here's a little something special for you. I wasn't going to take no for an answer." I took the SD labeled bag and pulled out a pressed white jersey. On the back, it read Lawson with the number 36. "We have been reserving that number with the intention of you coaching one day. Number 36 will retire with you for the San Diego Padres."

I gripped the shirt with a bit of sorrow in my heart. I had never meant to retire so early. My body just wouldn't let me continue. It was even harder to accept a job that indefinitely assured the world my days as catcher were over. Even though my knees were as good as new after my double knee surgery. I was fit enough now to play even better than I had the last 5 years of my career. "Thank you." I fist bumped Oscar with my jersey still in hand.

"Let's go talk to the team." Oscar announced rubbing his hands together with excitement.

In the locker room, the players all turned as I walked in. "Boys!" I shouted with open arms.

Blip gave a side smile and welcomed me in with a big bear hug. "Why didn't you tell me as soon as you got in?"

"I didn't want to spoil it for you." I replied with the little breath I had left after he squeezed most the air out of me.

Oscar cleared his throat, "I am pleased to announce that Lawson here has accepted the position as your coach!"

Everyone cheered and began giving me congratulatory shoulder slaps and fist bumps. It felt like a homecoming. I was right where I wanted to be. In that moment of celebration, my heart contracted a sharp pain of sorrow. This new chapter in my life would begin with the closure of my life with Rachel. I guess I had chosen.

I gave a speech about how I was looking forward to working with such great players and how sorry I was to have to step in after the death of Al. I paused to remember the wake. Everyone had gone to the wake, including Ginny who has been gone for 3 years now having been traded before I retired. It had always been my intention to follow through with my feelings for Ginny once I retired, but when I finally did, she was in another state playing better than she had ever played. I could not imagine showing up in the middle of her stardom and proclaiming my love for her. Besides, she wasn't calling me either. We didn't really speak to each other at the funeral as Rachel was on my arm. Ginny gave a quick condolence and wished us well. I had been keeping up with her career as I did with all players. She was famous now and a few more women had joined the major leagues since she began. None compared to her by a long shot.

I was setting up my office when Oscar came in. "Big news! Guess who else is coming back?" Oscar sat on my new desk, again rubbing his hands with excitement. I leaned back in my chair shrugging my shoulders in response. "Ginny Baker." Oscar announced with his hands in the air motioning like he just served the news on a silver platter. I felt my eyes pop and I suddenly lost all ability to form words. I also found I had forgot how to breath. "You're welcome." Oscar continued.

"What?"

"You're welcome… for bringing you America's hottest player of 2019. Don't ask me what I had to do to get her." I remained speechless. "The board wants to fill those seats and now that their most beloved catcher is the coach, they wanted to bring San Diego's second loved player back. Ginny Baker. San Diego's dream team is back!" He shouted. "Well, a little different than before because you were her catcher before so now, we had to bring in a new catcher because Livan wants more money so we had to trade him and …" Oscar was rambling.

"Why didn't you bring this up before?" I scoffed.

"I'm telling you now, cause now you're Coach. What do you mean before?" Oscar was confused.

I thought about it. Why would Oscar have to tell me before? Would it have changed my decision? No. I needed to be back in baseball. This had nothing to do with Ginny. But this was not going to be as glorious as I had thought with her around. Just fucking great.

Oscar looked concerned.

"Look, I know it's going to cause some friction with some of the guys getting to know how to behave with a girl on the team again, but that's why It's soo great having you as the coach. Who knows better how to handle this than you?"

I rolled my eyes. Of course, Oscar and everyone, except Blip and Evelyn, knew nothing about what had really happened between me and Baker and I needed it to stay that way especially now that I am coach.

"When will she be here?"

"In a week maybe?"

"Ok good. I have an idea. We need an architect here now."