Only two hours to go until midnight and the New Year's Eve party in apartment #19 had hardly gotten going, when Monica realized she had to do something, anything, just to avoid having a nervous breakdown still this year. The stress and the frustration especially, could just no longer be borne. She briefly considered getting drunk, like on her thirtieth birthday, but although that had worked quite nicely then, with Chandler taking care of everything, today, it just wasn't an option. Not when there was still so much to do and take care of. No matter that it had seemed like a good idea at first to have the New Year's party at #19 for a change. Not her own idea, though – even if it was true that meanwhile it was almost a tradition to celebrate the New Year in her apart-, no, her and Chandler's apartment, and that it was high time the others got a chance to be the host to such an important event and take over all the work and trouble it entailed, she would never in a million years admit it. Especially not when she didn't really mind all the work, actually enjoyed it even. She loved being the host. Always had. And furthermore, never, never in a million years would it have occurred to her to have a party on such an important date in the small and cramped – and smelly to boot - neighbor apartment to her own. What used to be the 'boys' apartment and was now home to Rachel and Joey who, as wildly different as they were, yet seemed both equally indifferent regarding order and cleanliness. She was quite sure that they hadn't even bothered to clean the bathroom! True, Monica would never risk using it anyway, not if her own gleaming, squeaky clean bathroom was just across the hall, but it was the principle of the thing. If you invited guests to a party you made sure your bathroom was clean … actually, that everything was clean. And tidy. And well stocked. And sweet smelling. Everything her – well, Chandler's and hers – apartment was. And Rachel and Joey's wasn't. Not even close.
Unfortunately, there had been no other options. Ross still wasn't on good enough terms with his mean neighbors to invite them, and Phoebe was still redecorating her newly renovated apartment after the fire. And both Rachel and Joey had fairly jumped at the chance of having a party at their place. So much in fact, they hadn't even let her help, and though she had at first been quite content to wait her turn, she was now slowly but surely getting desperate to do something. Preparing snacks, stocking up beverages, adjusting decorations, cleaning even – by now she would fairly jump at the chance to clean the bathroom – or anything at all, just to stop her having to worry some more about her new New Year's resolution and if she really needed a new one.
A new resolution to replace the one she had kept so faithfully throughout two years now. Two years during which that resolution had proven itself on numerous occasions, but failed to help her achieve the ultimate goal. Chandler and she had built up a wonderful relationship, weathered countless crises and obstacles; they were now living together, and it looked as if nothing could ever separate them again, that nothing could break up that wonderful harmony they had worked at so diligently and maintained so carefully. Absolutely nothing. Except for the fact that Chandler still hadn't proposed marriage to her.
When she had first resolved on that resolution two years ago, she had estimated that it would take them two years maximum to achieve the final goal, the high point of their relationship that would also mark the beginning of a new phase – the one in which they were married and starting a family. And now, two years had passed and they weren't even engaged. In fact, if you faced the facts – as she'd had to do more and more often in the past months – their relationship seemed to stagnate ever since they had moved in together; ever since Vegas where things had still looked so promising. They had even been on the verge of getting married there. She was fiercely glad now that they hadn't gone through with it, but the fact that it had been Chandler's idea had made her more than optimistic that he would also take the next step and propose, in good time, if she gave him time to arrive at this point by himself.
That's what her resolution had been about two years ago. To hold back and restrain herself from pushing him, taking the lead and directing him in any way, in short to foreswear all her natural instincts and act quite contrary to the way she had in previous relationships. And it had paid off. At least, for some time.
There had been numerous occasions when she could have, well, if not broken but maybe stretched her resolution a bit, occasions when she could have gently nudged him into the right direction, with a remark maybe or a subtle clue. But she hadn't; she'd kept back, reined herself in, bravely and determined, and now here she was with nothing to show for it. For more than a year now, it seemed to her that they were just going through the motions, treading water without going anywhere. True, they were having fun with it, lots of fun and good times. Their sex was still unbelievably good, even after more than two years of nonstop practicing. The memory of Chandler doing her in the Santa costume still had her break out in goosebumps. But that was all it was – just fun, nothing more. They lived together like an old couple with no thought of the future, just enjoying themselves. And Chandler was putting on weight. And Monica found she could no longer keep those doubts at bay.
What if she had told Chandler about the Morgan Chase museum and what a beautiful place for a wedding it would be? Or if she even had put her name down as Rachel and Phoebe suggested? Would it really have made a difference? Chances were he would never even have heard about it, but still she hadn't been able to do it. It had seemed too – risky somehow. Like challenging fate.
But maybe that's what she should have been doing? Taking a risk, facing the challenge? She'd never before balked at that. On the contrary, throw a challenge her way and she would snap it up, ignoring all risk with her eyes only on the prize. Except when it concerned Chandler and their relationship. This was something she would never even consider putting at risk, guarding and protecting it instead almost by instinct, and all out of a deep, unreasonable fear of losing Chandler, or even worse, scaring him away. Making him run.
She had even avoided meetings with her parents where it was only the two of them attending, and when Janice had turned up so unexpectedly in Allessandro's kitchen, she had somehow managed to fend her off without even mentioning Chandler once. The anniversary dinner had been the last straw. They'd gone out to celebrate their anniversary and run across Kathy and Nick of all people. Monica, at first, had just gaped, frozen to the spot and then completely overreacted, laughing hysterically and gesturing wildly, and, naturally, caused Kathy to notice them all the more quickly. And Chandler too had been too surprised not to acknowledge them. Afterwards, Monica never could really explain how it happened that suddenly all four of them had shared a table and spent the rest of the evening together, regardless of the awkwardness. Or was it only her who'd felt awkward? Had Chandler really only been polite and distant, or had he warmed a little to his ex as the evening wore on? The more she thought about it, the stranger it seemed to her that he'd even been able to bear the sight of her. And of Nick, the very man she'd cheated on him with. Well, it had been over two years. Almost three. And maybe Chandler felt safe with her at his side and magnanimous too. Maybe. And Kathy had seemed truly happy with Nick. Granted, she was an actress, and a good one too, but Nick hadn't seemed as if he felt uncomfortable either. More like oblivious and trusting and so very obviously devoted to Kathy; almost pathetically so. Monica felt sure that Nick wouldn't need much encouragement to pop the question. Maybe he had even planned to do it on that day and she had unknowingly spoiled it?
She would never know, and to be honest, she didn't really want to, not if it meant meeting Kathy and Nick again. Much better to let sleeping dogs lie and avoid all potential trouble. Like when she had seen Richard in her restaurant one day and hid in the kitchen until he had left. Who knew what could have been triggered if she had talked to him on that day?
But she hadn't, she'd kept safe and true to her resolution and now here she was, all alone among the party guests, at a New Year's eve party with less than two hours to go until midnight. She didn't even know where Chandler was. He had seemed nervous and preoccupied all day, and she'd thought it wiser to leave him alone. She couldn't quite bring herself to hope, but maybe, possibly, he was planning to propose to her tonight after all? Shortly before midnight, when the countdown started and they could seal it with a kiss? What better time could there be? It would be the perfect moment for them, how could he not see that?
All at once Monica decided to quit worrying. Either he would or he wouldn't, there was nothing she could do about it. If he would propose, fine. Great. Wonderful. If he didn't - well, then she would implement a new resolution. She would become active, take every opportunity to push him, try out every chance. If the worst came to the worst, maybe she would even take the matter in her own hands and propose to him herself.
So she determinedly turned her back to the bathroom door and walked to the counter that now doubled as a bar for the party to get herself a drink. And at that exact moment the phone started to ring, almost inaudible among the noise and the music, but very noticeable for her. She also noticed that the answering machine was turned off and was just debating with herself whether to answer it – she just hated it when phones kept ringing with nobody answering them – when Joey suddenly popped up behind the counter and got it, covering his other ear and screwing up his face in his effort to make out whatever the caller was saying.
"What? … Who? … Yeah, he's here, just a sec – who's this again? What? Really, how is – oh, okay, here's Chandler. Chandler! Hey! It's for you!"
She hadn't seen him come in, but suddenly Chandler was standing next to Joey, looking puzzled as he took the phone from him. "Chandler Bing – yeah. Huh? I don't – what?! Really? You have – oh. Wow. Yeah. Sure. No problem." He glanced at his watch with a slight frown. "Okay, right. What was that? Okay … so what does she think?" Suddenly he grinned broadly, and Monica, for no reason at all, felt as if she'd been punched in the gut. She? Who was she? Don't jump to conclusion, a voice in her head advised her, in that reasonable calm tone that's never really convincing. At least now it wasn't.
"Well, if she really wants to … I'm on my way!"
The moment he hung up, Monica ducked behind the corner, for no reason she could say, just because it felt like the right thing to do. She knew only too well that he would immediately see it on her face that something was wrong, and she just couldn't let him. If there was one thing she just couldn't bring herself to admit, even to herself, it was that she was feeling jealous. Or even concerned, for lack of a better word, whenever Chandler was in contact with another woman, no matter how innocuous and harmless. She just couldn't stand it, period.
As it turned out her caution was unnecessary. After a brief, but very intense, exchange with Joey, Chandler left hurriedly without looking back. Monica's alarm grew when she saw Joey standing lost in thought, scowling at the phone. When she spoke to him, he fairly jumped.
"Where's Chandler gone? Who was that?"
"What? Huh? Ahm, nobody!" Joey immediately turned all out defensive. "Chandler? He'll be back soon. Don't worry!"
"Joey …" This came out more sharply than she'd intended, but Joey's exaggerated denial had her fear the worst. "Who was that on the phone?"
"I don't know, just some guy." By now it was obvious that he was hiding something, and Monica suddenly felt panic rising up from inside her. What if Chandler didn't come back in time? It was less than two hours to midnight. What if he didn't make it back until then for them to kiss at midnight? …and for him to propose..? a treacherous voice in her mind whispered.
…what if he doesn't come back at all? Another added, even more poisonous.
It was no use. She had to know who had called Chandler and got him to leave in such a hurry or she would tear herself to bits in two minutes flat. So she leaned over the counter and snatched up the phone, entering the callback number and pressing the phone to her ear before Joey even realized what she was doing. When Joey lunged for her, it was too late, there was already the answering machine's message playing that had her gasp for breath.
"Hi, this is Kathy's. Oh, actually Kathy and Nick. That's right, we're the Ka-nicks! You know what to do."
Monica stood frozen with the phone pressed to her ear, oblivious to Joey's beseeching and protestations. Kathy had called Chandler. On New Year's Eve Kathy had called Chandler and caused him to run out the door pell-mell without even telling her where he was going. Well, how could he if he was going to her? He knew how Monica would react. There was absolutely no harmless and reasonable explanation she could think of. And only one thing she could do.
She needed to go after him. If she stayed and waited, she would rip herself to shreds long before he returned. If he returned.
She knew it meant she had to break her resolution, but couldn't care anymore. She had waited long enough. Now it was time to get active, get out there and fight. Fight for Chandler.
Except as soon as she ran to the door and out into the hallway, Joey lunged for her and barred her way.
"Where do you think you're going?"
"Joey …." Monica immediately saw that it was no good. Joey would always take Chandler's side and shield him no matter what. He would stop her at any cost, so there was no way she could pass by him and leave the building by the stairs. But as soon as she realized that, she had an idea.
"It's okay, Joey, I'm not going after him. I just wanted to get some more snacks."
"Snacks?" Joey frowned, but was visibly swayed. "What kind of snacks?"
"Oh, all kinds. Mostly crab cakes."
"Really?" Joey's face all but lit up as he hurriedly stepped aside to let her enter apartment 20. Once inside Monica quickly locked the door and, snatching her coat, hurried to the window that gave on the balcony, climbing quickly out and over the railing on to the fire escape. It was cold with a hint of rain in the air, and the stairs were old and rusty and occasionally quite slippery, and she had to force herself to slow down and descent at a reasonable pace, cursing the fact that she lived so high up. There was a sticky moment when the ladder at the last landing wouldn't budge at first, seemingly stuck until it at last gave way and rattled down, screeching horribly. Then it was finally done and she dropped off to the sidewalk, home and free. Without even taking the time to clean her hands, she walked off briskly down the street. For a short horrible moment on the stairs she had almost panicked when she couldn't remember Kathy's address, but then it had suddenly popped into her mind just as she was wondering if there was a place open where they still had a phonebook. She felt quite lucky that Kathy's place was not that far, just three or four blocks, so she wouldn't need a taxi. Chandler had probably walked too: maybe she would even overtake him before he arrived there? She knew it was hopeless but still quickened her steps until she was almost running. There was very little traffic and almost no other pedestrians while every house seemed to emanate party noises with people dancing or standing at the windows and on the balconies, watching some early fireworks. It was so unfair, Monica thought bitterly. By any right this should have been their first New Year's Eve together as an engaged couple. They should be together with their friends at her – at their place, dancing, watching TV, drinking champagne, kissing at midnight and marveling at the fireworks. Why oh why didn't he propose yet? What was he waiting for?
Maybe something changed his mind, the treacherous voice in her head whispered. Or … someone...?
Finally she arrived at the building where Kathy lived and entered the lobby when she found the door open. There seemed to be a party in almost every other apartment, and people kept passing her as she slowly ascended the stairs, all of a sudden feeling apprehensive. How would Kathy react? Would she deny everything? Or just laugh at her? Suddenly, Monica felt quite sure that Chandler's attitude had changed after they'd met so unexpectedly at their anniversary dinner. Had that made him change his mind? Had he fallen for Kathy again? Their breakup had hit him really hard. She knew it better than most. Hadn't she been there when it happened and seen it with her own eyes, the despair in his eyes, how he'd spent weeks in his sweats, unshaven, listless, depressed, a walking wreck? Jus as bad as she herself had been after her breakup with Richard. What if Kathy had told him she still wanted him?
No. Monica clenched her teeth as she started up the stairs. This couldn't be true. Chandler loved her. He had long since forgotten Kathy, just as she had forgotten Richard. Richard meant nothing to her now, and she was sure that Kathy meant nothing to Chandler anymore.
And here was apartment 10, with her name under the bell. The apartment seemed very quiet, too quiet for her liking. What if Kathy and Nick had gone out? But she had to try at least, so Monica rang the bell and waited, shaking inside, not sure if she still wanted to confront Kathy or not. Almost immediately she heard footsteps approaching the door.
"Hey, forgot your keys … again?" Kathy stared at Monica in surprise. "Wow. Monica? What are you doing here?"
Monica swallowed. "Where is he?"
"Who? Nick?" Kathy looked even more confused. Well, she was an actress after all, so it still could be an act.
"Chandler!" Monica almost spat. "Is he here?"
Kathy shook her head. "No. But come on in." Stepping aside, she let Monica pass by her into the small and comfortable living-room with a big yellow couch. Both doors to the kitchen and bedroom respectively were open, and it was very obvious that nobody else was there. But just as she wanted to apologize, Monica saw the bottle of Yoohoo on the table and fairly pounced on it.
"Yoohoo? And what's this, a cigarette butt? Ha! You can stop pretending right now. Missy!" She wagged her finger in Kathy's face, fully expecting her to back down, except that Kathy's expression of confusion didn't change. "You had your chance, and you blew it! Now I've got him, and I won't let him go! Never! You hear me?"
"Yes, I do. Loud and clear." Kathy winced. "But I don't understand. You seriously think, me and Chandler – Wow. No. You can't be serious."
"Why not?" Monica had meant to sound all assertive and sharp, and was dismayed to find her voice trembling and weak. "Why did he come here if not –"
"Beats me." Kathy shrugged. "Not for me he didn't."
"What? But you called him!"
"No. I didn't call him. That was Nick."
"What?" But Monica suddenly realized it was true. Joey had said "some guy" when he'd passed Chandler the phone. Would he even let Kathy talk to Chandler? All of a sudden her knees seemed to give out, and she dropped on the couch.
"And for what it's worth, I've absolutely no idea why Nick called him. You'll have to ask him. They left together ten minutes ago. Nick's probably planning some surprise or other. He always does that."
"Oh. That's ... nice."
Kathy pursed her mouth. "Not really."
"Oh? Maybe … what if he wants to propose?"
"Propose?" She frowned. "You mean, at midnight, get down on his knees with a ring and all? Ugh, I really hope not."
"Why not? Don't you want to get married?"
Kathy looked uncomfortable. "Maybe sometime. Not now. It's not a priority." When Monica stared uncomprehendingly, she smiled a little wistfully. "I really don't want to get tied down right now. Not while there are – other options."
"Such as?"
"Oh – I don't know. I would rather concentrate on my career now. Maybe land a part in a big TV series someday. You know, something really cool. With weird crimes and serial killers, with me as some kind of agent. Something like that." Then with a shake of her head she seemed to return to the here and now. "Anyway, I'm sorry I can't help you with Chandler. He's probably gone back home. Only half an hour to midnight."
"What?" Panic stricken Monica looked at her watch and jumped up as if catapulted out of her seat. "Half an hour? Oh my god!"
She raced to the door and only remembered her manners when she almost in the hallway. "Oh, and – well, thanks. I hope you get that part. I'm sure you will!"
"Good luck, Monica." Kathy smiled. "To you and Chandler both. Happy New Year."
Then Monica was flying down the stairs in a white-hot panic to get home, almost stumbling a few times and catching herself on the bannister. Just as she had arrived in the lobby, the door was thrown open and Nick stormed in, passing by her without noticing and singing something on top of his voice and so out of tune that Monica was already outside and halfway down the street when she finally placed the song.
"Aruba, Jamaica, oh I want to take ya - Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama…"
Monica laughed to herself. So that was the 'big surprise' Kathy had talked about. Not a bad idea actually. The Beach Boys tune was totally catching too, and soon she found herself singing. At least she could carry the tune much better than Nick.
"Key Largo, Montego, baby why don't we go, oh I want to take you down to - Kokomo ... We'll get there fast and then we'll take it slow, that's where we want to go, way down in Kokomo …"
We'll get there fast and then we'll take it slow. If only she could. If only there was time enough for her to get back home in time to kiss Chandler at midnight. Nothing else mattered now. It was the only thing that counted. How could she have been so stupid to run after him? How on earth could she have suspected him of cheating? Now that she knew she'd been totally wrong, she realized too how absolutely inconceivable it was.
Just when she thought she would never make it, that it was too late for everything, she finally turned into Bedford St. and arrived at her building. At the entrance she almost panicked when she thought that she'd forgotten her keys, but then found that the door was open, which probably was because all the other tenants seemed to be up and about and partying in nearly every apartment she passed on her way up the stairs. She didn't dare look at her watch anymore and only concentrated on running up the stairs, finally making it to the 5th floor, panting and nearly swooning. The door to #19 was open, and the noises from the party spilled out across the hallway. And here was Joey, closely followed by Rachel.
"Monica? Oh, thank god you're back! Did you find Chandler?"
"What?!" Monica had to support herself against the wall. "He's not here yet?! Where is he?"
"He said he'd be back before midnight. I told you to stay put!" Now Joey looked genuinely worried. "Didn't you catch him at – um, ah –"
"No, he wasn't at Kathy's." Monica suddenly felt close to tears.
"What's going on?" Now Phoebe came out into the hallway, followed by Ross. "Where's Chandler?"
"Not at Kathy's apparently," Rachel said dryly.
"Kathy? Who's Kathy?" Phoebe screeched.
"Kathy? The actress? My girlfriend?"
"Which one?"
"The one Chandler stole from me?"
"The one Chandler went into the box for?" Ross added helpfully.
"Stop it!" Monica held her ears. "All of you!"
"Monica, calm down." Rachel put an arm around her. "I'm sure he'll be back soon."
"But it'll be too late!"
"No, it won't. There's still time. Why don't you phone him?"
"I left my phone in the apartment …" Monica said dully.
"Then go get it!" Now Rachel and Joey together almost pushed her at her door. For a moment she resisted, because she somehow couldn't imagine that phoning Chandler would do any good. But it was better than waiting in the hallway and tearing herself up while midnight came and went without them kissing. Better if she was alone where nobody would see her anguish.
So she opened the door to her – to their – apartment and came to a dead stop on the doorstep, with one foot already raised in the air and her jaw seemingly coming unhinged as she took in the scene before her.
The apartment was dark except for a large number of candles, mostly tea lights that had been placed on the floor in such a way they seemed to mark a path that wound its way along the kitchen into the living-room and then further back and up the step to where the lit Christmas tree still stood in front of the big window, ending at Chandler's feet where he stood just beside the tree, his arms stretched wide and grinning.
"Oh hey, there you are! I really thought I'd have to do this without you."
Still unbelieving Monica turned her head. The others were still crowding the doorway, grinning goofily and elbowing each other. When she stared at them unbelieving, Joey winked at her and closed the door, or at least tried to against Rachel's and Phoebe's muffled protests. But Monica didn't care anymore because as soon as she looked at Chandler again, he slowly, almost ceremoniously went down on one knee, accompanied by muffled ooohs and aaahs from the audience at the door.
Still unbelieving, one hand clapped on her mouth and feeling as if she was dreaming, Monica slowly went forward, following the path of the candles. In passing, she noticed that the tea lights were swimming in water in all kinds of bowls and soup plates, apparently half her tableware had been recruited for the cause. When she arrived at the big couch, she noticed furthermore that the TV was on with the sound turned so far down that the noise from Dick Clarke's Rockin' Eve was barely noticeable, and that it was five minutes to midnight. And finally, at the step to the alcove, she noticed that Chandler was wearing his best suit, the one she liked especially because it brought out his eyes, and he was now reaching for the inside pocket of his jacket.
"Oh my god …" she whispered. "Chandler, what is this …?"
Then she was standing in front of him and looking down at him and his hand as it went behind his lapel and came out again, holding a small box, which, as he opened it, turned out to contain a ring.
A ring. No. The Ring. The most wonderful ring she had ever seen. It had a diamond with at least one carat, probably two, and the most beautiful sapphires on either side. It was perfect. And Chandler was holding it out to her, with that mischievous smile on his face.
"Monica, I –"
"Yes!" she said wildly, her voice almost breaking. "Yes! Yes, I will marry you!"
Chandler stared at her open mouthed, looking a bit confused.
"Honey, we've been over this. I have to ask first, and you need to hesitate and stare hard at me and the ring while the silence gets unbearable, until at last you say –"
"I don't care."
"Fair enough." He cocked an eyebrow at her. "But I had that whole beautiful speech prepared and now you tell me it was all for nothing?"
She opened her mouth and then shut it again, all at once remembering her new resolution two hours earlier. Then she slowly got on her knees facing him, their noses almost touching.
"I'm afraid so. I'm sorry for your speech, but all that matters is that you're asking me to marry me, at this perfect moment. And because it's the perfect moment, I'm now asking you, Chandler: will you marry me?"
For a second, it looked as if a quizzical remark was rising in him and immediately got pushed down again. Then he held up the ring between them so their eyes met in it and simply said:
"Okay."
There was some audible moaning and cheering from the door, but Monica didn't hear it. She only stared at the ring as Chandler slid it on her finger, watching it catch the light from the Christmas lights on the tree. It fit perfectly, as if it had always been there, and she already vowed never to take it off. Then Chandler cleared his throat.
"That's so funny what you said about the perfect moment. Because that's what I was going to say. That I was waiting for the perfect moment."
"I know" she whispered, almost inaudibly. Somewhere, deep inside, she had always known. This was it. Their time. The magical moment when a window opened on their reality and they arrived at a point where everything was possible and nothing mattered except that they had found each other, over and over again.
She only realized that someone had turned up the sound of the TV when she heard the countdown being shouted from the audience on time square.
"Thirty-three! Thirty-two! Thirty-one!"
Looking up, she saw that the others had come in and gathered in front of the TV, as well as some of the party guests, who had strayed from #19 to them and were now holding up their glasses and cheering. But so far, everybody was taking great care to keep their distance and give them their privacy. She looked back at Chandler and down at their still joined hands and laughed, blinking away the tears that threatened to spill out.
"But when?" she whispered. "When did you decide –"
He smiled wryly. "Beginning of September."
"What? But –"
"I know."
"Twenty-seven! Twenty-six! Twenty-five!"
"When Phoebe told me about the waiting list at the Morgan Chase museum and that you'd wanted to put your name down, but decided against it – I knew. I knew how hard it must have been for you to let that go. And then I found the ring. The perfect ring."
"Twenty! Nineteen!"
"Then why didn't you –"
Chandler winced. "Yes, I found the ring and then I lost it again. I'd forgotten my credit card, and when I came back to the store, it had been sold to somebody else. I kept searching for it, but couldn't find the new owner. Then the clerk at the store told me the buyer had wanted to give it back, but they couldn't refund him the whole price, so he sold it elsewhere –"
"Thirteen! Twelve! Eleven!
"Well, to cut a long story short, tonight Nick phoned me to tell me the ring was in a pawnshop, and he had the ticket and gotten the shop owner to open for us and let me redeem the ring."
"Nick?! You – and he … "
Chandler grinned. "Yeah, turns out he's quite a good guy. So I got the ring, and he got the tickets to the Caribbean cruise a colleague of mine sold me."
"Oohh. So that was why – oh my god."
"Eight! Seven!"
"Seven" they repeated, their heads leaning together and laughing at each other.
"Six! Five! Four!"
"I love you so much!" she told him, and they laughed again when they realized he had said it at the same time, exactly matching her words. When she felt his arms go around her, she clasped him to her, tucking her body into his.
"Three! Two!"
"ONE!" They said it together as their lips met and fused, exactly on the stroke of midnight, while the world around them exploded into fireworks and cheers.
"Happy New Year! Happy New Year!"
Monica was dimly aware of the shouting and the cheers and the noise of the fireworks and crackers going off, but only as something that happened far away, far removed from where she and Chandler were kneeling with their arms wrapped tightly around each other and welded together by their kiss. At some point, she seemed to have closed her eyes, and when she opened them again, her vision was filled with lights in all colors of the rainbow exploding over and over against the dark night sky and reflecting in the glass of the big window and the shimmering Christmas balls on the tree, and also in Chandler's eyes as he looked at her.
And also in the stones on her new ring. White and blue fire mixed over and over with shifting colors and shadows, flickering as if it had a life of its own, growing brighter and brighter until it nearly blinded her, and when she reflexively closed her eyes against the glare, the lights still played against her lids, swirling and turning, and then she began to see images in it, figures of people amidst the whirls of light and color. Two people, always two people, holding each other and kissing, repeated endlessly, and as soon as she observed them, she knew who they were, realizing too that she had always known. There was one version of themselves, her and Chandler, kissing in the middle of a throng of people partying around them in the great hall of some hotel or other, then another where they were kissing as the fireworks above them mingled with snowflakes falling gently on them where they stood in a yard in front of a big house, and another where they were in front of a big fireplace with a Christmas tree just beside them. In this one, Chandler's hair seemed to have gone quite gray...
She only opened her eyes again reluctantly when Chandler released her mouth again and they stared at each other wordlessly for a long moment. She wanted nothing more than to tell what she had seen and ask if he had too, but knew there was no need. Of course he had. This was their moment, their very own, all across time and dimension.
"Happy new year, Chandler," she whispered instead and felt a surge of pure happiness rise in her as he smiled widely at her at this.
"Happy new year, Monica," he said tenderly, his voice low and warm with no trace of mockery in it. When he shifted his shoulders a little she caught sight of the ring again. Her engagement ring. HER. RING.
"I'm engaged!" she screamed, suddenly unable to hold back. "I'm engaged!"
"Yeah, you are!" Chandler agreed, grinning as he got up and helped her to her feet. Now the others crowded in, shouting New Year's wishes and congratulations and cheering when she flapped her hand with the ring on it at them and held it high.
"Aw! My little sister!" Grinning goofily, Ross enfolded her in a bear hug. "I'm so happy for you!"
"Let me see your hand!" "Yes, lets' see it!" Phoebe and Rachel grabbed at her hand to exclaim over the ring in wonder. Phoebe peered at it closely, examining it from all angles while Rachel made a big show of sniffing and wiping at her eyes.
"Oooh, Monica, it's soooo beautiful! I'm so happy for you! And not jealous at all!"
"Are you sure it's the real one? Looks like a fake to me. I'll give you ten dollars." Phoebe told Chandler while surreptitiously trying to tug at the ring. Monica folded her fingers around it just in time.
"Don't worry, Pheebs, when you're ready I'll make sure you get one that's worth at least eleven dollars." Chandler replied while wincing under Joey's heartfelt thump on his back.
"That's my boy! All grown up! Oh man!" Joey looked ready to burst into tears. When Ross tactfully offered him a napkin, he sniffed at it suspiciously.
"Crabcakes? You said there weren't any crab cakes! Where are the crab cakes?!"
"Who's playing at your wedding?" Phoebe demanded to know.
Monica smiled at her. "If you do it for free, you're welcome!" And before Phoebe could sputter something in return, she waved her arms above her head until everybody around her fell silent.
"Everybody – I just want to say – I just can't tell you how much that means to me. That you did this. Made this possible."
"Would have been a lot easier if you hadn't run out on us," Ross remarked dryly.
"Yeah. Alright. Anyway, I'm so happy you're all here for my special – for our special night – whew, close one, Monica – and I just, I just wanna say – um –" She turned to Chandler, who just smiled at her indulgently and then mouthed the word 'thanks' to her. "Yes! Thank you! Thank you all!"
"Aw. We're all so happy for you too, Monica. And still not jealous! Alright, maybe a little bit." Rachel sniffed again.
Then Joey reappeared in the door. "Hey! The champagne's ready! Come on over! Let's celebrate!"
"Champagne?" Monica asked, and Chandler grinned.
"Yup, got two cases all cooled down and ready already yesterday. I planned everything. Why do you think the party really was at Joey's? If I had hidden anything here, you would have found it right away. And everything worked out perfectly. The only thing missing was the ring."
"Oh my god. What would you have done if Nick hadn't called?"
Chandler shrugged. "I'd proposed anyway. Couldn't miss that perfect moment, now could I? Now come on, we need to celebrate! Your special night!"
"Our special night," She corrected him. "I want this to be your special night too."
His expression softened, and he lowered his head to kiss her. Monica threw her arms around his neck and pressed against him. They had just gotten good and going when Joey came back in.
"Hey, none of that now! You've got all the time of the world for that! Now come on, the champagne's getting cold- um, not cold. You know what I mean!"
"We're coming!" Monica shouted, all of a sudden overwhelmed by fresh excitement, and striding by Joey almost ran across the hallway to #19, where, indeed, a pyramid of champagne glasses filled to the brim were waiting on the counter, with her friends and the other guests waiting around it and cheering her as she came in. Gunther gave her one of the flutes from the top, and she held it out.
"I'm engaged!"
.
"Yeah, you are!" Chandler agreed, smiling at her with his face so close to hers their noses almost touched. His hair was standing up in sleep spikes and he was sporting his usual morning stubble. "It's a new year, but you're still engaged. And still to me too!"
For a moment everything seemed completely unreal, as if nothing fit together. She was lying down instead of standing and clinking her glass with everyone present; there was a pillow under her head and a coverlet over her lower body. For a split second she thought she was naked, then she realized she was wearing a very thin filmy wisp of a nightie – one of those she kept for special occasions. Occasions like just now, or rather yesterday. Right, it was morning judging by the light filtering through the blinds, so they were in bed where they had ended up after last night's celebration -
Celebration. Special night. The perfect moment. All of a sudden, the memories crowded in, so fast she couldn't keep track. The New Year's eve party, the fireworks, the phone call from Kathy - wait, Kathy? - all the candles, Nick bounding up the stairs, the countdown, Chandler under the Christmas tree, Chandler and her kneeling facing each other, the story of the ring –
The ring! Monica shot up as if stung and stared at her hand. There it was. The ring. The perfect ring. Still there. It hadn't been a dream. Chandler had proposed to her and given her this wonderful ring, the one so much worth waiting for –
"Are you okay?" Chandler asked. "It almost looked like you had a nightmare, but you kept screaming 'I'm engaged!'"
"Well, I am engaged!" Monica flopped back, a huge smile on her face. "Finally! I really think it will take some time to get used to this. Yes! It finally happened! I'm going to be a bride!"
When she turned to him almost breathless with joy, Chandler was looking at her very oddly.
"Um – honey, I'm very happy for you, but – finally? Get used to it? Still? Am I missing something?"
"I think yooou aah-are!" she sang out. It must be a joke, her brain insisted. He's having you on, of course he is. He can't have forgotten, unless … "Looks like someone had too much champagne last night!"
"Did you have too much maybe?"
"Noo! Well, maybe. But not so much that I could forget what happened! You proposed to me under the Christmas tree, and it was sooo –"
Chandler's brows rose almost to his hairline. "Under the Christmas tree?! Wow, I wish I'd thought of that. They're hard to get in September, though."
Monica stared at him. "But you did, you waited there for me, when I thought you were still out looking for me, and you had the ring-" Upon seeing his now carefully neutral expression, her memories of last night suddenly seemed to fade away, becoming as insubstantial as the sunlight reflecting in her mirror. "Last night. Just before the countdown. At the window …"
"But we weren't here last night. We were at the Plaza, remember? And honey, you took that tree down after Christmas. Because it was shedding already?"
As Monica's jaw dropped, he smiled. "Any chance this may have been a dream? It sounds terrific though."
For a long moment, there was a sense of loss, and something that felt almost like grief for something irretrievably gone from her mind. Something hauntingly beautiful, a memory shimmering in all colors of the rainbow, dissolving in the light of reality and vanishing forever. A dream, nothing but a dream, beautiful and wonderful, but just a dream.
"You're right. It was a dream. But – it felt so real!" Suddenly she laughed. "So crazy too! Can you believe it? I dreamt we met Kathy and Nick at dinner."
Now Chandler's jaw dropped. "Kathy? But – but … didn't she leave for Los Angeles?"
"Yeah. I know. She said – in my dream, she said she wanted a part as an FBI agent in a series with weird crimes and serial killers."
"Oooh. You had me at FBI agent."
"And Nick wanted to take her on a cruise."
"Wow. Oh, like the one my coworker had tickets too?"
"What?"
"Yeah, he wanted to sell them to me, but you said you didn't want to go. Remember? …Aruba, Jamaica, oh I want to take ya, Bermuda, Bahama, come on pretty mama…"
Monica had clapped a hand on her mouth as the final piece fell into place.
"I never said I didn't want to go! I said I couldn't go, not with all the planning for the wedding. And – a cruise? Really?"
Chandler wrinkled his nose. "You're right. On a floating city the size of this block and even more crowded? But still, the Caribbean!"
"We can still go there. On our honeymoon!"
"But didn't you want to go to Paris?"
"Nah." Monica cupped her hands around his head to kiss him. "We'll always have Paris."
.
A/N:
So here we go again! I feel really blessed that once again the muse didn't let me down and I managed another chapter of this series that I've grown so fond of over all those years. Now thanks are in order once more for everybody who supported me in some way on this board, even if it was just by reading my fics. First of all Fictionwriter91 for betareading and adding a ton of much needed punctuation, plus for reaffirming my faith in this chapter, to Oldreruns for all his support and fun talks, dito to CamilleCM, to MissRoxy87, Starbuckmeggie, Boris Yeltsin, Simplymondler, Likat1234, Sadie E Mcbride, Matteney, Chrisi2503, Soumi97, SpiralnebulaM31, and all the other people who PMd, reviewed, or simply read my stories and did not lose patience with me.
Thank you all and have a very happy and above all HEALTHY NEW YEAR 2021!