So a lot of shit is going to happen in this chapter and i would like to warn and have a trigger warning In this chapter I will be covering some very dark and deep scenes such as self harm bulimia anorexia and drug abuse even though its yin fen it still counts as drug abuse. I deeply apologise if you cant read this chapter because of the things it discussed. I would also like to say that some of these topics is incredibly triggering for me but I managed to do this and its very hard sometime to do so. Anyway thank you for reading this and on with the chapter. Also Im going to stop signing my name at the end of these A/N because I want to. Date start: 10/01/21 or 01/10/21 Date finished: 13/01/21 or 01/13/21
DISCLAIMER: I do not own Shadowhunters the mortal instruments either the book, the film or the tv series. I also do not own any songs, films or tv shows in this fic all I do own is Fallon Rose and Tian I also own Marcel. I don't own the originals either sadly Klaus and Elijah may be a little oc but they belong to the originals as I based them on the characters. Marcel is not based on the vampire on the originals.
After Simon had fed on her and given the name for the vamp she left to meet him. He was a fair pale colour and his hair was a shaggy brown, It made him look like a kid but even she knew he wasn't. It was pretty dark when they had met up but he gave her what she wanted and she gave him what he wanted which was money and blood. They finished after a while but she knew that her family was bound to know that she was gone by now, she grabbed her crystal pure adamas stele and created the rune that her mother created when she needed to get to Lake Lynn. When she went through the portal she left no trail of ever being there and made it to the institute where voices could be heard. One voice she could hear said,
"I don't care she is broken hearted and she needs to be found." Alec was the voice she could hear and when she entered the Institute the first person to notice that she was there was her mother, Clary let out a breath of relief before running to her and hugging her.
"Tian, thank god you're ok." Clary said rubbing her back, Tian drew back and spoke.
"I'm going to my room." But before she could make it to her room Jace grabbed her arm,
"Where the fuck were you?" Jace spoke calmly.
"Does it fucking matter. I'm 16 dad I'm allowed to do what I want." She said breaking her arm out of his grasp and going to her room.
"Klaus go with her." Alec said pointing to her room, Klaus obeyed this time. Tian was sat on her bed flipping a dagger in her hand when Klaus came in, he sat next to her.
"You ok?" He asked, she looked at him as if he was dumb, "Right stupid question sorry I asked, what about a drink?" Tian nodded and he left her alone. Tian grabbed her stele and drew a new blocking rune that conceals pain from Parabatai's but only a little bit. The dagger she had turned into a razor blade, she made a cut down her wrist before healing it and chucking on a long top to hide the scar that remains. Klaus came back seeing her with a new top on but thought nothing of it he passed her the glass of whiskey that he had gotten for her. She said her thanks before downing it.
Time jump -5 months
Tian continued to go down a destructive path, getting the Yin Fen from Simon and Marcel. When it came to eating she didn't even if she did, she would throw it back up only using the nourishment runes. She continued to hurt her self, the Shadowhunters in the institute noticed her getting thinner and thinner but did nothing about it. Izzy also noticed that she kept leaving the Institute looking pale then coming back looking much better and she knew something was up so she told Klaus who asked Tian but she lied to him saying she was fine. After she told him that she was fine Elijah came back from visiting Fallon and watched them train, Klaus and Tian were fighting with wooden sticks when they took a break and Elijah came in.
"Hey Elijah." Tian said whilst bending down to pick up her water bottle and taking a sip from it.
"Hey Tian. You're looking pale are you ok?" He asked worried about his 'sister'. He had always classed her as his sister since they were little.
"I'm fine." She responded before sitting down on the bench. Klaus walked up to Elijah and whispered in his ear.
"She's been like that since she woke up-" He was cut off by Tian speaking.
"You know I am right here and can hear you?" She rolled her eyes before continuing, "You ready to continue Klaus." Klaus nodded before grabbing the sticks that were on the floor, Tian got up of the bench but a little to fast and the lack of food she's had for months caught up with her, so she fell but before she could reach the ground Klaus caught her.
"Go get help Elijah." Klaus commanded checking her pulse, Elijah does what Klaus said and got Alec. It was lunch time so Alec was with Clary and Jace so when Elijah said,
"Somethings wrong Tian's fainted." They followed him to the training toom, Alec had gone to get Katerina whilst Klaus was activating Tian's Iratze rune which just kept fading away. (A/N so I feel like I need to clarify Tian can fully die till she turns 17 so when she turns 17 she cant fully die. She's not invincible because if she was so would Ithurel but Lilith killed him in the show so Tian might be invincible to normal Shadowhunter weapons but not Uriel blades and she can feel pain in fact she feels pain more than every Shadowhunter does. She can die for now but after she turns 17 she can't die from eating disorders or self harm.) Katerina came in with a stretcher, Klaus lifted Tian onto it and helped Katerina take her to the infirmary. Jace Izzy Klaus Elijah and Alec were waiting on the infirmary chairs whilst Clary was pacing but Jace stopped her and held her as she sobbed into his shirt. Tian was drifting in and out of consciousness as Katerina noticed scars and vampire bites along her arm, Tian was mumbling Fallon when Katerina also noticed how thin she was. Katerina leaves her alone hooked to an IV that was helping her to stay alive,
"She's stable for now and she keeps slipping in and out of consciousness. She keeps mumbling for someone named Fallon?" Katerina said, Klaus and Elijah looked at each other communicating telepathically before Katerina continued, "Clary, Jace could I speak to you alone please?" They both nodded before getting up and following Katerina. "So I've noticed somethings that you may not want to hear." Katerina finished sighing.
"What do you mean?" Clary asked, tears forming in her eyes.
"When I looked over her and put her into a gown, I noticed self-inflicted wounds, vampire bites and I could see her ribs. She can't breathe on her own and she looks like she hasn't been eating for months, I only know this because there are scars of nourishment runes on her body as well." Katerina said, Clary fell to the floor as her heart sank, she felt like she was losing Jace all over again. Jace quickly joined her, trying his best to calm her down by hugging her. He felt her tears soak through his shirt but he couldn't care less, he was also crying -The boy who never cries was crying- but he wasn't going to let Clary know that. One of his tears fell onto Clary's head, Izzy Alec Klaus and Elijah we looking at them clearly knowing that something was wrong.
"I don't know when she will wake, I'm so sorry but you are allowed to see her." Katerina said before moving back into Tian's room
"This can't be happing Jace. I've failed her I've failed being a mother." She sobbed, Jace looked at her seeing the pain in her eyes.
"Never say that Clary. You've not failed her. You have not failed being a mother. We have raised a strong woman who will change the world, every time I look at her I see you. You gave her the best parts of you, your stubbornness, your beauty, your grace, most importantly you taught her not to put her self first always put others first. So don't you ever say you failed her." Jace said moving a lock of hair out of her eyes. Klaus was the first person to go in and see her. She was lifeless, her skin was pure white as if she were a ghost. He saw all the machines that were keeping her alive and he ran, not being able to see her looking like that. Elijah followed him knowing exactly how he felt when Haley his Parabatai died. Elijah loved Haley they were Boyfriend and girlfriend thanks to Tian but then Haley got killed after a demon attack.
"She will be okay Klaus." Elijah spoke not even believing his own words.
"I can't even feel her Elijah, and our sister needs to be here in case-" Klaus couldn't even bring himself to say instead he kicked a cabinet causing it to smash, then he punched a wall.
Time jump - 3 days later? I dont even know anymore
Katerina rushed into Tian's room after the EKG (I think thats what its called idk) started to beep and Tian's body started to rapidly shake. This had been happening every day for the past 3 days. Katerina tried to give her the morphine to stop her from shaking but couldn't.
"I need some help in here." Katerina yelled, Jace was the one who came to help because he had told everyone to go sleep and Clary he had put in their room because she had fallen asleep.
"What's wrong with her?" He questioned.
"She's seizing I need some of the morphine. Hold her down for me please." Katerina asked, he held Tian down as Katerina administrated the morphine. Tian eventually settles down but is still convulsing, Jace stood there looking at his daughter's body.
-Flashback-
The day Tian was born
After Clary named her and they had spent a few hours with her Tian struggled to breathe, Clary screamed for Jace who came running towards her noting the distress she was in. Tian had stopped breathing and Katerina ripped her from Clary's arms causing her more pain Jace just stood there holding onto Clary's hand as she wept for Tian. Tian laid there lifeless as Magnus and Katerina tried to get her to breathe. Clary was screaming for her child with tears freely streaming down her face, Jace was holding her as she cried. Eventually after multiple tries Magnus was able to let her breathe. They took her out of the room attached her to a machine to help her breathe better, Clary eventually fell asleep from crying in Jace's arms. The way she looked was pain staking and Jace would never forget the look on her face as Tian was ripped from her arms.
-End of flashback-
Jace was pulled back into reality by Katerina talking to him.
"Sorry, what did you say?" He asked.
"She's stable for now." Katerina repeated. Jace nodded before moving back into the infirmary hallway, where he was met with Alec who saw the tears that were in Jace's eyes and hugged him.
"What's wrong with her Jace?" Alec asked pulling back from the hug.
"Katerina found scars and vampire bites along her arm and she was so thin, she hadn't eaten anything for months. Clary feels like she failed her just like I do and I just keep remembering what happened the day she was born." Jace said brokenly. Alec sighed.
"I'm so sorry Jace." Alec said sitting down in one of the chairs. Jace followed the action by sitting in his own chair.
"Clary is exhausted shes hasn't slept since she found out, Tian's barely alive even if Clary did sleep, she would wake up because of nightmares like the ones when we were looking for the mortal mirror." Jace sighed,
"I know but all we can do now is wait." Alec said, he watched his niece as she laid still with machines coming out of her and connecting her to bags of nourishments and other stuff. "There is something we might be able to do Jace." Alec spoke breaking Jace out of whatever trance he was in.
"What is it Alec I'll do anything to help her." Jace said frantically.
"We could get Magnus to look at her because if we took her to Magnus she might not-" He was cut off by a familiar voice that came from the infirmary doors.
"Nope she remains under the institute control no downworlders in the institute."
"Dad." Alec scowled, Robert however looked pleased. When Tian was born he had made sure that he would never be her grandfather and that she was a abomination because she was half angel half demon.
"I think the best thing we can do is pull the plug and let her die, she's not fit to run the down world she never was." He laughed. Jace glared at him,
"You stay the fuck away from her, she's my child not yours." Jace glowered. Robert made a face that was a pouting face,
"Aw poor Jacey. Your acting like a fucking child she needs to die." Robert snickered,
"I'm the head of the institute and she rules the shadow world not you; you just want her out of the way so you can have more power." Alec said fuming
"Maybe I do maybe I don't what's it to you, all you are is a week Shadowhunter letting emotions cloud your judgement. To love is to destroy after all." Robert said before Maryse opened the infirmary doors.
"Robert shut up she is amazing, but you never cared that you had a granddaughter because you thought she was an abomination just because she was half angel half demon."
"She is! She's been getting Yin Fen from a vampire I can tell you who that is. No angel is half demon!" Robert yelled.
"I don't care Robert." Jace spoke with exhaustion. Robert grabbed his seraph blade from his belt and ran into Tian's room, before he can do anything Alec uses his own seraph blade and stops him. Alec stabs Robert in the ribs, knocking him out but on the way down he pulled some wires that were connected to the machine keeping Tian alive. She stopped breathing and none of them cared what vampire gave her the Yin Fen, all they cared about was her getting better. Katerina rushes into the room and fixes the machine but Tian still doesn't breathe. Jace collapsed to the ground as he realises that she's gone, he no longer held the shell that he used to hide his true emotions. Maryse hugged him as he cried and after what felt like hours for Jace, Tian finally started to breathe again. Alec didn't leave her side for the next few hours and Jace had finally fallen asleep, Maryse was the one to put him in his room next to Clary. Magnus had joined them in the infirmary to see if he could do anything and he couldn't, the only thing that he could do was make her feel more comfortable. Alec and Magnus fell asleep after a few hours and Jace had woken up and read, only to be startled by Clary waking up screaming.
"Clary are you ok?" He asked her, Clary didn't notice that Jace had spoke. "Clare are you ok?" She nodded at him,
"Yeah just another bad dream it reminded me of when she was born and how straight after she was born the Clave had taken her away from me." She responded. Jace lent down and kissed Clary on the lips letting his tongue touch hers. As they kissed Clary had gotten up and wrapped her legs around his waist pushing him against the wall. His arms slithered around her waist holding her up, they quickly stopped when they heard a knock at the door it was Luke he had come to see how Clary and Jace were doing Jace quickly held Clary as she unwrapped her legs from Jace he helped to steady her.
"Luke thank god you're here." She sighed in relief, before going to hug him.
"Hey Kiddo, hey Jace." Luke spoke, Clary broke the hug and moved back to where Jace was. Jace just nodded at him. "She got any better?" Luke asked, Jace shook his head,
"Don't really know, Clary and I have been here sleeping till I woke up and then Clary woke up." Jace shrugged,
"Ok. Oh by the way I'm taking Robert with me to Alicante call me if anything changes." Luke says before leaving the two alone.
"Why is he taking Robert to Alicante?" Clary asked Jace, spinning round to look at him. Jace's shoulders sagged as he recalled what had happened,
"He tried to kill Tian but Alec stopped him luckily." Jace said,
"Oh." Clary looked down at the floor. Jace lifted her chin so she was looking at him, he gave her a quick kiss before handing her his shirt and grabbing his own clothes. Clary switched out of her clothes from last night, quickly removing her bra and putting Jace's shirt on. She smirked when she saw Jace looking at her when she took her bra off.
"Looking at me now are we?" She questioned, he smirked back at her before kissing her and holding her hand. They headed to the infirmary to see Magnus sleeping beside Alec, Jace smiled at his Parabatai's sleeping face and the fact that he didn't leave his niece alone. Clary's smiled dropped when she saw Tian with more colour and breathing on her own, she started to cry happy tears. Jace woke Magnus and Alec up and told them to go back to their room and sleep, they hesitantly walked to their room but before they do Clary hugs Alec.
"Thank you." She whispers in his ear, he pulled back and gave her a smile. Magnus and Alec walked through the infirmary doors as Jace and Clary sit watching their daughter. Clary's vision starts to go as she thinks of a new rune and when she clearly has the image she asked Jace,
"Jace I need your stele." She looks at him as he raises an eyebrow at her as if saying 'why' "Trust me?" She asked, he nodded and passed her his stele. Clary walks over to where Tian was laying and drew the rune on her forearm. All of Tian's runes lit up before Tian's eyes slowly fluttered open, she saw her mothers green eyes and smiled weakly. "Tian." Clary whispered.
"By the angel I'll go get Katerina." Jace does as he said and got Katerina who asked a bunch of questions,
"How did this happen?"
"I had a vision of a rune and drew it." Clary stated, Katerina nodded before removing Tian's breathing tube with a mask.
"This is just a precaution." Katerina spoke, Tian nodded as Fallon stepped into the room.
"Tian you're ok thank the angel." Fallon let out a breath of relief, Tian looked passed her parents toward her dead girlfriend's Parabatai. She removed her mask, Tian struggled to speak but Fallon knew what she said.
"Put your mask back on and rest." Fallon told her before looking at Clary and Jace. "Mrs and Mr Herondale."
"Fallon how many times call us Clary and Jace." Clary said before going to hug Fallon. Jace had left the room to get the rest of the gang. Clary moves to where Tian is and passes her a note pad before kissing her head and sitting down. Tian wrote one the pad 'I'm sorry' Clary tilted her head in confusion,
"Why you've got nothing to be sorry for?" She asked, Tian wrote 'yes I do' before she started to cough, Clary grabs the water bottle and unscrews it as Tian removed her mask. She drank some before putting the mask back on and wrote 'thank you' on the pad. Fallon was now sitting next to Tian's bed on one of the chairs.
"I'm so glad your ok Tian." Clary said before hugging her daughter again, Tian's ears started to ring so she grabbed the stele that was sat next to her bed and activated her Iratze. Tian wrote on the pad 'Where's dad?'
"Gone to get everyone." When Clary finished speaking, Tian started to see black spots and was struggling to breathe, she continued to cough before Clary spoke
"Tian are you ok?" Tian pointed towards her throat before finally giving into the darkness and blacking out.