Chapter 8

Neville sighed and ran his hands through his hair, pushing his chair back from the microscope. He hadn't been able to concentrate on his work all day and he was fairly certain he'd made a number of mistakes in his research notes. He decided to call it a day and head back to the cottage, although he was a little apprehensive about what he was going home to.

Draco had been quiet and withdrawn since the party and Neville didn't know what to do to bring him out of it. He was so wrapped up in the past and Neville couldn't blame him; there was so much baggage for him to carry but Neville worried that the weight of it would crush him.

He entered the cottage and was surprised to hear voices coming from the living room. He recognised them as Harry and Luna's immediately and wondered what they were doing there and if Draco was aware that they were there. He made his way through and found his friends sitting on the sofa, Draco in the armchair opposite.

"Hey guys," he said, relieved to see that things appeared amicable.

"Hey Nev," Harry said with an easy smile. "Been busy?"

"Um…yeah. Just trying to get some research done. What um…what's going on?"

"It's an intervention," Draco said with a wry smile, which came as something of a relief.

"Just so," Harry said, mirroring the smile.

"We're here to convince Draco that the past should stay where it belongs," Luna said softly, "and offer him some ways to do that."

"Oh?" Neville said, perching on the arm of Draco's chair. He resisted the urge to put his arm around the man's shoulders, unsure if Draco wanted the others to know about them.

"Draco can't move forward for a number of reasons and one of those is that he has no qualifications and therefore no way of getting a job, but we can do something about that," Luna said with a smile. "He's expressed discomfort at the thought of working in the wizarding world so muggle qualifications are the way forward."

"But that's not really feasible is it?" Neville asked. "I mean – "

"Don't interrupt. It disrupts the flow of my thoughts." Draco and Harry both sniggered and Luna continued, "In recent years the Ministry has set up a department that liaises with its muggle counterpart to provide people like Draco with the necessary paperwork to use in applying for educational courses."

"Yeah," Harry said, jumping in. "They'll give him GCSE and A-level results, a national insurance number, all the kind of stuff that proves he's an actual person with a paper trail."

"Wow, that's incredible. And you're up for this?" he asked Draco.

"Yes, yes I think I am," Draco said with a nod of his head. "As much as I love Annie I don't want to work in the village shop forever and it would be nice to feel that I have a purpose, something to work towards. I can't go back to…to what I was," he said, frowning and looking down at his hands.

"That won't happen, I promise," Neville said and rested his hand gently on Draco's upper back. "There are so many things in the future, you just need to start looking ahead."

"It's been pretty hard to do that up until now but I'll try."

Harry braced his hands on his knees and said, "Let's go and get your weekly check-up done and dusted."

Draco stood and said, "Are you going to cup me while I cough?"

"If you play your cards right, sure," Harry replied with a grin before wincing and doubling over slightly.

"Are you ok?" Draco asked, concerned.

"I'm fine," Harry said, straightening up. "She's just kicking extra hard today. I reckon we have a footballer on our hands. Here, do you want to feel?"

Harry reached out and took hold of Draco's hand, placing it gently on his abdomen. There was a moment's pause before Draco's eyes widened and he said, "Oh wow! I can feel her. That's amazing."

"Pretty neat, huh?" Harry said with a smile. "You can so tell it's a Weasley in there."

Harry led Draco off up the stairs and Neville watched them go with a smile. He knew how excited Harry was about the baby, whom they had all started calling 'her', and it was nice to see Draco looking so enthused about it.

"He'll be a great father," Luna said, absent-mindedly twirling a lock of hair around her finger.

"Oh for sure. Well, he's already a dad to Teddy, isn't he?"

"No, I meant Draco."

Neville choked on air and tried to catch his breath, thumping his chest and saying, "What? What are you talking about?"

Luna smiled benignly at him and said, "Not for a while of course, he has a long way to go first, but he had an incredible amount of love to give. Yes, I think he'll make an excellent father."

Neville cleared his throat and said, "Well…I'm sure you're right."

"Of course I am," Luna said with a shrug. "He has a lot of love to give you too, you know."

"Well…it's early days," he replied, not bothering to question how Luna knew. He didn't know what his feelings for Draco were and it was too early to examine them anyway. He'd never been in love before and he wasn't sure he'd recognise it if he were. He had to hope that he and Draco could muddle through things without too much emotional turmoil.

"How did it go with Harry?" Neville asked Draco later when Harry and Luna had left.

"He's pleased with my progress," Draco said as they sat at the kitchen table eating dinner. "He reckons it'll probably take a full year to undo all the damage I did but I'm getting there."

There was silence for a moment as Draco patted his mashed potatoes with his fork, saying eventually, "He said that George's brother, Bill might be able to help with removing the Mark."

"Oh?" Neville said, surprised.

Draco nodded, continuing to prod his dinner. "Something about his work with curse-breaking, he might be able to undo the magic in it…or at least know someone who can."

"Well that's good news, right?" Neville asked, wondering why Draco wouldn't look up.

"I suppose so," Draco said, throwing down his fork and apparently giving up on his dinner. "It's just…I don't know if I deserve to have it removed."

"Draco – "

"No I'm serious. Shouldn't it stay there as a reminder? Shouldn't the world be able to see how wrong I got it? And Bill Weasley helping me? I'm the fucking reason the man's scarred for life."

"Hey, Bill rocks those scars, he thinks they're incredibly sexy."

"Doesn't change the fact," Draco said with a huff.

"Are we going to spend the rest of our lives going over all this? I know you have guilt and shame, and I know I can't begin to understand it all but we've talked about moving forward."

Draco wrapped his arms around his slim torso and said quietly, "Harry wants me to see a mind healer."

"I think that's a good idea."

"Logically…yeah, but having someone root around in my head…laying bare all my problems…I don't know if I'm ready for that."

"You need help, and I'm not saying it unkindly. You have a lot of stuff to work through and I don't think you should do that alone."

Draco gave a resigned sigh and said, "You're right, I know you're right. It's just difficult. The thought of it is so overwhelming."

"Well then just keep it as a thought for now," Neville said gently. "When it seems less overwhelming…then you can think about it."

Later they sat cuddled against one another on the sofa in the living room, the windows open, letting in a pleasantly warm spring breeze. Neville let his fingers card through Draco's hair and listened to the noises his colleagues were making in the greenhouses. Spring was always a busy time in the world of Herbology and Neville enjoyed the activity it brought.

"Have you given any thought to what kind of course you'd like to do?" he asked Draco as the man's hand trailed patterns over his chest.

"Luna left me some literature to look through. I think…I think maybe something where I could help people, people who have been through the same kind of things I have."

"That sounds amazing," Neville said, pressing a kiss to the top of Draco's head.

"There are lots of options for finance as well, student loans, that kind of thing. For the first time in a long time I feel really hopeful. And…if I could help someone who's lost their way…well, it would make up for a lot of the harm I've done."

Neville knew better than to try and argue Draco out of that attitude. There were dark clouds that hung over his head that no fancy words would dispel and it almost felt like an insult to try and negate what he felt. It still hurt to hear the man's harsh thoughts against himself and he fervently hoped that he would consider seeing a mind healer.

A few days later, Bill Weasley made an unannounced visit. Neville was in the middle of making a pot of tea, discussing Fleur and the kids, when Draco arrived home from his shift in the shop. He stopped in his tracks, looking as though he'd like nothing more than to turn and run. Instead, he stood rooted to the ground, his eyes darting between Bill and Neville.

"Draco, good to see you," Bill said affably, getting up and offering Draco his hand.

Draco took it, looking uncertain, and said quietly, "Hi. Bill, right?"

"That's right. Oldest and best-looking Weasley sibling."

"Told you he thought he was gorgeous," Neville said with a snort.

"You're not denying I am, surely?" Bill said with a grin and Neville rolled his eyes. The truth, of course, was that he'd once had a very big crush on the man. He'd spent a lot of time with the Weasleys after the war, Bill included, and he'd enjoyed getting to swoon over him. The crush had faded after a few months but he couldn't deny that Bill was a very handsome man.

"So Draco," Bill said, accepting a cup of tea from Neville, "Harry tells me I might be able to help you."

Draco's hand went instinctively to his covered arm, his shoulders hunched as he said, "I um…I don't know. Have you…done this kind of thing before?"

"Not specifically with the Mark but I have been able to extract dark magic from a tattoo or scarring on a person's skin. It can be a complicated procedure and it's not without its risks but I can certainly see what I can do."

"What would I have to – "

"Let's just start with an examination, mm? Shall we go into the living room?"

"I'll leave you to it," Neville said, preparing to head out to the greenhouses.

"Would you stay?" Draco asked softly.

"Of course," Neville said with a smile.

They made their way into the living room and Neville sat on the edge of the sofa while Draco took the armchair and Bill perched on the footstool in front of him. "Roll up your sleeve for me," he instructed, and Draco complied.

He looked away as Bill examined the Mark, holding his arm carefully before he extracted his wand and performed a series of spells. Draco's face was pale, his jaw clenched tightly, looking as though he would rather be anywhere else at that moment.

"It's a tricky one, no doubt about it," Bill said, pocketing his wand again.

"Does that mean you can't do it?" Draco asked hesitantly.

"Not necessarily. It might just take a slightly different approach than I'm used to using." He paused for a moment, looking thoughtful, then said, "I think I'll do a little research, consult with a few colleagues and get back to you in a week or so. I'm hopeful though."

"I can't…I won't be able to pay you," Draco said awkwardly.

Bill gave him a kind smile and said, "There's no charge on favours for friends."

"We're not friends," Draco said, confused rather than nasty.

"Friends by association then," Bill said, unperturbed. "Either way, no charge."

"We were thinking of heading to the pub for dinner. Want to join us?" Neville offered.

"Thanks but I have to get home. Victoire has a school play tonight…unfortunately."

"The trappings of parenthood," Neville said with a wry smile.

"Don't gloat," Bill warned, "it might be you one day. I'll be back in a week or so, let you know what I've come up with."

"Thank you," Draco said sincerely. "I appreciate it."

"No problem. I enjoy a challenge." He gave them both a salute and apparated from the spot.

"Well, that seems promising."

"Yeah, yeah maybe. I guess we'll have to see," Draco said, and Neville was pleased to see that he actually looked quite hopeful.

He decided to leave the topic alone, at least until they heard more from Bill. They took a lazy stroll into the village, the spring evening warm. Neville was glad that the bad winter weather seemed to be behind them, if only for Draco's sake. The poor man couldn't take the cold, although it did lead to some very nice cuddling sessions on the sofa.

The pub was a lively hub in the village centre and most people gravitated to it on a Friday or Saturday night. Neville knew most of the people there and he said friendly hellos to most of them as he and Draco made their way to a nice little nook in the corner.

Deciding not to mention the meeting with Bill, Neville stayed on neutral topics and they mostly spoke about his current struggles with his research. Conversation came easily between them and the rest of the pub seemed to fall away and Neville focused only on the man in front of him.

For a rural place in the middle of Hampshire, people were surprisingly open-minded when it came to more 'cosmopolitan' things. Neville knew barely anyone would bat an eyelid if he reached across the table and took hold of Draco's hand but he didn't know how that would be received. He didn't know if Draco was ready for things to progress outside the world of their little cottage and he didn't want to overwhelm him.

He wasn't even sure what it was they were. Were they a couple? They hadn't told anyone what was going on between them, not even Harry, but things were so tentative that Neville supposed neither of them wanted to rock the boat. They needed baby steps, and Neville was more than prepared to accept that.

They finished their meal and migrated to the bar. A few of the locals believed Neville was some kind of gardener and they always took the opportunity to pick his brains over their horticultural issues. He answered their questions over a pint while Draco stood by with an indulgent smile.

"And are you in the trade?" Sid, the landlord asked and Draco coughed into his lemonade.

"He's a friend from school," Neville said.

"Currently between jobs," Draco added.

"Have you done any bar work?" Sid asked, and Draco smiled.

"Plenty. Sadly nowhere as nice as this place."

"One of my bar staff handed in her notice a couple of days ago, left me in the lurch a bit. Fancy some shifts?"

"That would be brilliant, thanks."

"Face like that would certainly pull in the punters," said a middle-aged woman who as perched on a stool in the corner.

"Cool your heels, Pam. Poor lad doesn't need you salivating all over him."

Sid took Draco through the nuts and bolts while Neville continued to impart gardening advice to the others. It was clear that Draco was at home behind the bar and his confidence seemed to grow as he stood there, his hands on the pumps, smiling at Sid.

"So that's two jobs now then," Neville said as they strolled leisurely back to the cottage.

"Not bad, eh?" Draco said with a smile, tucking himself into Neville's side. "Things are looking up."

"I should say there are."

They made it back slowly, stopping to exchange kisses along the way that had Neville giggling like a schoolboy. Draco was so responsive and Neville had never been kissed the way Draco kissed him. He didn't properly register that they had made it inside and up the stairs until his back hit the bedroom door.

He broke away from Draco, the man's arms around his neck, his lips beautifully swollen. "Do you want to?" he asked gently and Draco nodded. Neville turned the handle and backed them into the room, kissing Draco again as the candles sprang to life.

He pulled the man more firmly into his arms as his tongue insinuated itself into Draco's mouth, revelling in the feeling of electricity that pulsed through him. His hands travelled the length of Draco's back and he could feel the man tense under his touch. He pulled back and saw how uncertain Draco looked, his concern spiking immediately.

"I'm sorry," Draco whispered. "I'm sorry but I can't, I don't – "

"Ssh, it's ok," Neville soothed, moving his hands to rest lightly on Draco's waist.

"No it isn't. I knew this would happen," Draco said, looking desolate.

"It doesn't matter," Neville assured him.

"Yes it does," Draco insisted, wrenching himself out of Neville's hold. "What kind of relationship can we have if I can't even – "

"Draco, sex isn't the be all and end all. I doesn't matter to me if you can't – "

"It will matter though, won't it?" Draco said agitatedly. "Six months down the line when you're frustrated and wondering why you're bothering with someone who can barely be touched."

"Well it's nice to know what you think of me."

"Oh come on, Neville. You're a bloke."

"And you're what? A table lamp?" Draco scoffed and Neville said, "Do you think I'm some kind of caveman incapable of controlling my urges?"

"No, of course I don't but it's madness to pretend that this isn't an issue."

"Well maybe I think it's madness to make it this much of an issue. Do you really think that's all I'm interested in? I very happily dated an a-sexual bloke for months."

Draco made a noise of frustration in the back of his throat and said, "Well as you're still not together I'm guessing the lack of sex became a problem."

Neville sighed and said, "No, the fact that we had very little in common and were both too caught up in our jobs led to it fizzling out. Sex had nothing to do with it."

Draco gave a disbelieving shake of his head and Neville said, "You're doing me a disservice thinking that I'm the sort of person who'd treat sex this way."

Draco gave a relenting sigh and seemed to deflate a little. He ran a hand through his hair and tucked a few strands behind his ear. "And I think you're being naïve to pretend it doesn't matter."

"Ok, we're obviously not getting anywhere like this tonight and I'm not prepared to keep going around in circles."

"Fine," Draco said, heading for the door.

"Ah ah, I'm not done yet," Neville said, reaching out and grabbing Draco's arm. "Stay the night with me."

"What? But – "

"Just sleeping. I think it's about time you learnt a little something about intimacy when it's separate from sex."

"I – "

"I'm not going to force you or insist on it. I'm just going to go and use the bathroom and…if you're here when I get back then great. If not…I'll see you in the morning."

Neville spent a good five minutes in the bathroom, wondering whether he'd done the right thing or not. Things were complicated, that was for sure, but he was certain that this thing with Draco, whatever it was, was worth the effort. He changed into his joggers and toyed with the idea of putting on a t-shirt but he couldn't sleep that way and so stayed bare-chested.

He held his breath as he made his way back to the bedroom and couldn't help but grin when he found Draco sitting in his bed, propped up against the headboard. "Hi," Neville said with a smile.

"Hi," Draco said, his eyes going to Neville's torso. "You doing that on purpose?"

"It's how I sleep."

"You couldn't be a bit less gorgeous? Maybe even have an embarrassing tattoo or something?"

Neville laughed and sidled into bed beside Draco, maintaining a little distance between them. Draco looked sideways at him, back rigid, and said, "Now what?"

Neville gently slid his arm around Draco's shoulders and tucked the man carefully to his side. "Is this ok?" he asked, and Draco nodded.

They sat in silence, Neville running a hand up and down Draco's arm while Draco slowly nestled in closer and closer with each passing minute. The tension slowly started to leave his body and Neville smiled as things began to feel more natural. They snuggled down eventually into a lying position, Neville on his back with Draco lying cuddled into him.

"This is nice," Draco whispered, his voice muffled slightly.

"It is," Neville agreed. "Sex might come, it might not, but it would kill me if we couldn't have this."

"I don't think I've ever met anyone like you, Neville."

"Well that's good. Less chance of someone coming along and stealing you away from me. I'm kind of fond of you."

There was silence for a moment, their quietly mingled breathing the only sound in the room. Eventually, Draco nestled in tighter and said softly, "I'm kind of fond of you too."

AN: The interview went really well! I find out tomorrow if I got the job :) I hope you all enjoyed the chapter, please leave a review and let me know.