AN: Hello to all of you who I didn't scare off with last week's chapter. :)
I'm back at it again with some more angst, but things will probably start to lighten up after season one ends. This is more of a transitional chapter before the storming of the Fright Zone next week, but it has some nice character interactions for yall. First official appearance of the Horde Kids, anyone?
Enjoy!
Adora stumbled back to her barracks that night, holding her face with one hand and using the other to steady herself against the wall. She passed Bow and Glimmer's rooms, but both of them took one look at the blood rushing past her hand and said nothing, Bow's expression twisting up with guilt while Glimmer just looked away.
When she reached her quarters, she ripped a piece of her bedding off and fashioned a bandage for the wound. She headed to the mirror to apply it, but when she finally looked at her face, she stopped. There were three claw-like markings on the left side of her face, right where Shadow Weaver's fingers were when she gripped her chin.
Adora had thought it was a burn at first, but the wound was bleeding too much for that. The small dresser under the mirror, where she would place personal items if she had any, had a growing red spot on it from the blood dripping down Adora's chin. Blood just like what had dripped down Adora's knife in the grand hall of the Kingdom of Snows-
She shook her head, getting some droplets on the floor, and bandaged the wound, hiding it from sight. The more she looked at it, the more it started to look like the small claw wounds Adora had all over from when Catra was young and couldn't control her built-in weapons. Catra-
Everything hit Adora at once, so strongly that she stumbled to her bed and curled up in a ball like she could protect herself from the weight of what she had done. She knew she needed to prove herself and eliminate a threat to the Horde's mission. Deep down, there was a part of her that would never accept that, and that part ached like it was a wound, raw and draining her strength every second it remained untreated. Adora doubted the feeling would ever go away.
She cried herself to sleep, clutching Catra's blanket in her arms like it was all that mattered in the world. Its scent was long gone, but if Adora concentrated, she could still pretend that Catra was in the bathroom. Any second she would be back to sleep by Adora's feet and laugh that Adora had missed her so much after only a few minutes apart. Adora's dreams were filled with the delusion and she woke up feeling even worse than she had the night before, the warmth of her denial replaced by the Fright Zone's natural coldness.
Adora stumbled out of bed just as she had stumbled into it, wandering down the halls far too early in the day so she could shower alone. She didn't want to deal with any questions about her new wound or have anyone stare as she dripped blood down the shower drain. She'd go to the infirmary later and get properly patched up, but right then, she just wanted to wash the horrible night off.
"Morning, Adora." Adora stopped. Of course.
"Good morning, Bow." Adora offered as politely as she could manage. Bow beamed at her as he trotted down the hall to her left to greet her properly.
"I'm surprised to see you up so early. Most Force Captains sleep in since they aren't Cadets and don't have to do that crazy early training."
"I didn't sleep much last night," Adora remarked without thinking. Bow's smile melted.
"I'm sorry about yesterday." He said immediately. Adora frowned. "I said Shadow Weaver wouldn't mind that we didn't get the Sword, but she clearly did mind , so you were right and I'm sorry I dismissed your concerns." Huh. So that was what getting an apology felt like. It was nice.
"That's alright," Adora told him gently. "She didn't mind all that much. It was the secondary part of the mission."
"Um," Bow grimaced a little. "But your face-"
"Battle wound, from the target." Adora stopped him. "I'm sure you remember. She struck me in self-defense."
"Oh. Yes, right." Bow swallowed hard, all traces of the smile he had worn earlier now gone. Adora felt a little bad about that. "Sorry for the confusion. I'm glad Shadow Weaver wasn't too upset."
"As was I. I'm very lucky. Disobeying your commander's orders can have dire consequences. I'm fortunate Shadow Weaver was so forgiving." Bow's eyes went to the bandage on Adora's face before he faked a grin and went back to holding eye contact.
"Well, I won't keep you anymore. You're heading to the showers, I presume?"
"Nothing like a bracing wash to start the day." Adora nodded.
"Great. I'll see you at the noon meeting?"
"Yep."
"Be sure to head to the infirmary before then. That looks like it might need stitches." Bow waved a little and continued down the hallway towards his room. "See you in a bit, Force Captain."
"Bye, Bow." Adora smiled politely again and waved before he disappeared, and then she could let her face relax. Talking with Bow was nice enough – of him and Glimmer, he was definitely the preferred person to run into – but she didn't have the energy for a conversation. She was scraping the bottom of the barrel of her energy stores. She didn't have it in her to smile or feel happy about a pleasant social interaction. She'd be lucky if she made it to the showers and back without collapsing.
"You're up early." of course. Glimmer stood in the door of the washroom, pink hair dripping onto her fresh uniform. "Couldn't sleep?"
"I don't think that's any of your business." Adora said back. Glimmer narrowed her eyes.
"Regardless, I have to say I am surprised you were able to go through with the initiation. From Shadow Weaver has told me about you, you're incredibly loyal and annoyingly self-righteous." Glimmer continued.
"She talks about me?" Adora had always known Shadow Weaver had other students but until Adora and Glimmer met, she assumed her mentor would keep her the progress of her pupils to herself. It never occurred to her that Glimmer may already know much more about her than she knew about Glimmer.
"Never shuts up, more like. 'Be more like Adora, she just aced her explosives exam.' 'Adora learned this fighting maneuver in less than an hour, it should not be taking you days.' 'Even Adora's little pet can fight better than you.' She's obsessed with you." Glimmer grumbled. Adora flushed with embarrassment. "I hated you so much when I was little."
"That's not my fault. I work hard and I see results."
"Oh please. I've had to cast spells until my veins turn purple and my hands shake. You pass an exam and everyone thinks you're some kind of hero." Glimmer started growling. "You think it's so tough, killing traitors. I bet you cried all night."
"I repeat, that is none of your business."
"How are you ever going to sack villages when you can't take down one Beast without turning it into a sob story?"
"I didn't sign up to sack villages, Glimmer. Being a Force Captain is about restoring order to Etheria."
"And you think you can go through your entire tour as an officer and never be responsible for a little violence? This is war , Adora. You need to toughen up. I lost my father in a battle when I was eight! People die, get over it."
"And what, you've killed people?" Adora challenged. "With your own hands?"
"Yes, I have." Glimmer's tone lost some of its anger. "When I was still a Cadet, Shadow Weaver sent me on a mission to the town of Elberon. I was a medic, but my job wasn't really about healing. They had more qualified people to do that. My job was to take care of the unsaveable soldiers."
Adora wasn't expecting that.
"What happened?"
"Let's just say I kept the Horde from wasting resources on a burial." Glimmer said.
"Oh."Adora suddenly felt sick.
"The point is, you need to just get over it. If you're really the little-miss-perfect everyone thinks you are, I don't think it'll be an issue."
"I've never had to kill someone before. Let alone a friend."
"Well good news. She's not your friend anymore. She's a dead rebel." Glimmer pushed past Adora and started to walk off.
"Wait." Adora called. Glimmer stopped and didn't turn around. "Last night. You said every Force Captain has to undergo the initiation."
"Yeah. I'm actually surprised you'd never heard about it before." Glimmer her voice was surprisingly even. "Rumor has it Force Captain Juliet had to interrogate her own bunkmate because of suspected treason. Grizzlor fought his squadmates to the death for the position."
"What did you do?" there was silence for a long moment.
"I don't think that's any of your business." she kept walking.
…..
Shadow Weaver knew. There was no other explanation. She had to know what Adora was doing last night because when she returned to her quarters, the blanket was gone. Suddenly reinvigorated, she went back to her old barracks to see if it had been returned there and found her squadron was already training. Gods, being a Force Captain for a month had made her forget just how rigorous cadets' lives were. She sometimes missed the structure, especially now as she desperately looked for ways to escape her own thoughts.
She searched the bunks, but every blanket was the same, and the scent had faded a long time ago. Still, Adora only stopped searching when she came across the little drawing Catra and she had made as children. They looked so happy. Had she smiled like that since Catra defected?
"Still think we'll always be friends?" she asked, her voice a whisper. The little cutout didn't respond.
"Hey, I didn't want this. I just wanted you to come back." Adora accused. "You were the one who was being stubborn. You always run away, but you've never stayed away. Now I guess you're not coming back at all." The little drawing was silent, judging her.
"Don't look at me like that!" she screamed. "You should have come back! You should have never left me! We made a promise!" Adora pulled the still-red knife from its sheath and slashed it against the drawing, showing it who was boss. There was a quick moment after she felt the relief of releasing anger, and before she felt the sting of regret. Adora chased that moment, slashing several times in quick succession before the guilt hit her hard. She dropped the knife on her bed – their bed – and brought her hand to the carved image of her face, running it along the clotted wound.
With trembling fingers, she picked up the knife and drew the scar onto her picture. There, now it reflects both of our failures , she thought sadly.
"Adora?" Adora threw her head in the direction of the sound and saw that her squad had returned, sweaty from the training. Everyone stared, but only Lonnie was brave enough to speak. "You good?"
"That's Force Captain Adora to you, Cadet." Adora straightened and sheathed her knife as subtly as possible. Given that Lonnie's eyes followed her hand motion, Adora figured she wasn't very subtle at all.
"Ok, Force Captain ." Lonnie sighed. "Are you good?"
"I was just removing some graffiti from a public area." Adora bluffed. All three of her squad members looked at the defaced picture. None of them seemed convinced.
"The art that you made?" Kyle asked hesitantly.
"This graffiti ," Adora corrected harshly. "Was made by a now deceased defector. I was simply removing it to purge these barracks from acts of defiance against Horde rules."
"Do you need to talk? You're kinda freaking me out right now." Lonnie offered. "I imagine you had a pretty rough night after what happened with Ca-"
"Silence!" Lonnie stopped immediately. "I do not need your help or your pity, and it would serve you well to watch how you speak to your commanding officer!" Adora commanded, cringing internally at how much she sounded like Shadow Weaver. The three cadets seemed to hear it too, collectively taking a step back. "Now get out. You're wasting your shower time."
"Adora-" Kyle tried again.
"Get out!" she snarled, slamming a fist into the wall next to her. Rogelio picked up Kyle and carted him out of the room by the shoulders while Lonnie lingered for another moment.
"Why are you treating us like this? We're your friends."
"I don't have friends. I have subordinates. Subordinates who aren't heeding my orders." Adora flexed her hand and held back a wince. "Friends are for the weak."
"You didn't always think that." Lonnie narrowed her eyes.
"I grew up." She put a knife through her childhood less than a day ago. She felt a decade older but no stronger or smarter. Just more world-weary and distrustful. More tired.
"I see." Lonnie closed the door behind her as she left, leaving Adora alone with the graffiti. She looked down at the picture of Catra with Xs scratched into her eyes, alongside the little Adora who shared real-Adora's scar. Adora didn't remove the drawings like she said she would. She left it there. Maybe the next owner of that bunk would learn something from it.
Maybe they would learn to grow up before the world forced them to. It was something Adora wished she had done.
…..
"How's your battle wound, Adora? Healing alright?" Shadow Weaver asked when Adora stepped into the Moonstone Chamber. The bindings on it itched, but otherwise, the pain had faded into a low throb, a perfect distraction. It helped that Adora had also sprained her hand punching the wall.
"Yes, Shadow Weaver. They said in the infirmary that it would scar." Adora told her commander.
Adora and Shadow Weaver silently agreed that referring to her injury as a battle wound from the target she eliminated was the best course of action. Everyone who knew Adora had been on that mission and seen that she had not received it there, but no one pushed her when she insisted that's where she received the three scratches. They certainly looked like an injury Catra might have caused. Adora wondered if that had been intentional.
"That's a shame." Shadow Weaver said sweetly. She hadn't looked up from her casting bowl since Adora arrived. Adora felt unworthy of her attention and angry at herself for feeling that way. Shadow Weaver was a busy woman. She was probably doing something important.
"You summoned me for a mission?" Adora asked, steering the conversation.
"Not exactly. I received word from officers protecting the Fright Zone's borders that a skiff has entered our territory. It appears the Princesses have arrived to rescue our captive."
"I'll send the order to increase security around the jail wing." Adora offered immediately.
"Already done." She waved a hand dismissively, still glued to her bowl. "Tech Master Bow is increasing the cybersecurity of the cells, and my apprentice has cast several deterring spells around some of the main entrances. However, these measures are simply for show. The Princesses are going to breach the compound. That's why I've summoned you."
"What can I do?"
"Your enthusiasm is admirable, but I will urge you to let me finish while I brief you, Force Captain."
"Yes, Ma'am. I'm sorry." Adora bowed low, even though Shadow Weaver wasn't looking.
"It's quite alright." Shadow Weaver finally looked away from the bowl and turned to Adora, who stood straight again. "What I need from you is simple. Once the Princesses enter, I need you to keep them from leaving. Battalions will be all over the Fright Zone, but Princesses are slick. They'll avoid large groups. You should be able to locate and stall them long enough to set off an alarm and summon a battalion to your location. Then we will have five captured Princesses instead of one."
"How will I know where to find them?"
"These Princesses have a rudimentary understanding of the Fright Zone. They'll likely waltz right through the front door, where no one will stop them besides a few guards I added for appearances. I doubt they'll even disable the door sensors. Once one goes off, head to that location immediately. They'll likely try to exit through the same door they came through. You can cut them off easily."
"Yes, Shadow Weaver."
"You're dismissed, Adora. Good luck, and I hope that wound heals up quickly." Shadow Weaver called as Adora left. She ignored the comment. She needed to thicken her skin if she was going to survive.
AN: Alright, there you go. You've got some sad Adora, Glimmer being over Adora's angst factory, and Bow being best boy. (A YouTuber I like calls him Male Katara and I can't unsee it) Also Kyle exists. The next chapter will have more action but at this point, I don't think many of you are here for that.
Preemptive thanks to everyone who comments on this one. You guys rule. Until next time.