AN: Here we are again! Thankfully this week I had no podcast to edit or game to make! I may or may not share the game since it is Naruto themed, maybe once this campaign I'm running of it ends and I can fine tune it! That tidbit aside, enjoy the chapter!
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After the events of fun Friday Iruka had admittedly avoided two of his three friends out of shame. The third friend had gotten too annoying for him to ignore over the course of the week. As they watched the students mill about outside for lunch Mizuki moved his chair to the other side of the desk and assumed a pose Iruka had learned to hate.
"Please tell me what happened" his tone had only grown more irritating the hundredth time.
"No idea what you mean" Iruka leaned back in his chair while eating some meat he'd skewered.
"Come on please! If you got some because of my outfit selection I earned the right to know!"
"Doesn't really ring any bells with me."
"Just tell me if you made it to Bone city population two please bro?"
"Only two?"
"WHAT DO YOU MEAN ONLY TWO?" Mizuki slammed his hands down on the desk. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN?"
"Beats me."
"I KNOW FOR A FACT IT DOES NOT!"
He had started taking a kind of sadistic pleasure in withholding the information. Given how badly Mizuki wanted to know and how he was reacting Iruka had decided to hold off on a real prank.
"I'd tell you if you helped me score" he sat back in the chair and pouted now. "Like any upstanding bro would."
"Oh is that all you wanted to know?" he instantly leaned forward again. "You were right, that pachinko machine by the ice cream shop is like really easy to win so I scored a free double scoop."
"GODDAMMIT!" he stood up so fast the chair got thrown over.
"While you're up can you tell the students to start heading back inside."
"You're the worst person I've ever had the displeasure of knowing" he sulked off towards the door.
"Love you too buddy."
The rest of the day passed without too much fuss. Mizuki would throw him mean looks whenever he could discreetly do so. When it came time for the students to head home he took up his new position just out of view so Rōzu wouldn't be able to spot him. He could acknowledge it wasn't the mature way to act following vomiting in their home, but he did not care.
"He's over here!" Iruka panicked as Choji pointed at him and shouted this to someone out of his view.
"Ah nice, thanks kid" Rōzu gave him a fist bump and walked over to Iruka, throwing finger guns his way.
It did not escape Iruka's attention that Mizuki had done a full turn to watch what was about to unfold. This would be the last day he did not prepare a log to swap with for every day of school.
"So listen, no sweat about what happened on Friday" as they said this Mizuki dove into a bush right next to them. "I mean seriously it happens to loads of people. Gosh I remember the first time I was with two people guzzlin-"
"SO ABOUT LITERALLY ANYTHING ELSE!" Iruka loudly stopped them at probably the worst part of the sentence.
"Oh shit right, like I said no sweat about that, but uh, what kinda moves have you guys taught Naruto?"
"Moves?"
"Yeah like, I know you mentioned you didn't really teach something till the last year? I definitely forgot cause boy did we get smashed after that talk."
"Oh uh" he watched the bush Mizuki was in shake as the furious sound of a pen on paper could be heard. "Yeah we don't teach them ninjutsu till then."
"Ah so like, he's got no school moves?"
"Still not sure what you mean by moves, but no we haven't covered any jutsu with him."
"Ah gotcha gotcha, now like" he didn't like where this question was going. "If you got suckered into teaching him some moves, what would you teach him?"
"Did you get suckered into teaching him some moves?"
"Yeah apparently Itachi teaches Sasuke cool moves, such as shooting fireballs? So like, is that a good one?"
"Uh" Iruka paused at that, he knew the Uchiha had their own methods, but that seemed very odd. "No probably not?"
"Cool cool cool, what about like, I dunno, a Water Clone?" Rōzu gave him an odd multi-shrug.
"Definitely no, he still hasn't learned the basic clone technique."
"Right right right, uh, what about, Snow beast assault? That seems pretty basic?"
"What? No! Well, ok I honestly have no idea what that jutsu is, but we don't really have snow here."
"Yeah I've noticed and pretty much all of my moves use snow. So I'm a little low on moves to teach him. Could you maybe help me?"
"I already am his teacher; I don't really have too many other things I can show him" Iruka felt a little weird about giving Naruto outside of school help.
"Please I have backed myself into a corner here!" they got uncomfortably close to him. "I can offer you like literally anything you want in return for help please!"
"I-" he put his hands up to try and ward them off and say no again, before a disaster occured.
"HE'LL DO IT!" Mizuki leapt from the bush and stood by his side. "After all, what kind of teacher turns down a student who wants to learn more? Or his parent who is literally begging for him?"
"That's not" Iruka did not like the way he said that. "It's not exactly right for me to offer him extra lessons and no other student."
"Says who?"
"Our contracts."
"Ok well what if instead you came to show me a move or two and then supervise while I teach him it?" Rōzu tried to find a loophole here.
"Boom our contracts don't mention anything about us teachers assisting a parent do they?" Mizuki ganged up on him.
"Oh my god fine, I will help you and supervise as you show Naruto" he would never be able to give a seminar on resisting peer pressure again. "But just this one time!"
"Yes oh my god thank you so much!" Rōzu pulled him into a quick hug, making him groan as Mizuki flashed him two thumbs up. "You are literally a life saver right now."
"Does that count if I hang myself later" he grumbled this, knowing Mizuki was only going to get more annoying now.
"Is there like a sign out sheet for training grounds or something? Should I just bring him here later or what?"
"Just meet me here in an hour or so" Iruka didn't feel like showing them the sign out sheets today.
"Alright, again, thank you so so much!" with that they rushed off to grab Naruto and head off.
"DUDE" Mizuki grabbed him by the shoulders the second they were out of sight. "GUZZLING? YOU GUZZLED SOMETHING?"
"I really need more friends" he tried to wrap up the rest of his duties for the day while Mizuki continued yelling things like that.
"Like literally anything, bro" Mizuki grabbed him again. "That means literally only one things ever!"
"If you say sex I'l-"
"IT'S SEX DUDE!"
"Of course it is."
"And like what's better than this dynamic huh?" Mizuki moved behind him and put his arms over Iruka's while he tried to finish filing some papers. "When they mess up on the hand seals you guide them through it like this and boom. Straight shot to bone town."
"Mizuki."
"Yes?"
"Please let me go."
"I dunno man, I think you could use some hands on guiding for filing these papers."
"If" he couldn't make it through the full sentence without a sigh. "I play along, will you help me get this work finished up?"
"Yeah."
That final hour of work would somehow take the cake for the worst hour of his life. He made a note to apologize to his head parents later, but being "guided" through how to file papers and clean a glass room made him want to die. Whatever higher power existed took pity on him, as Rōzu and Naruto showed up ten minutes early.
"Go get em tiger" Mizuki gave him a hard pat on the back.
"I will be late tomorrow as I'll be drinking to forget all of this" Iruka took a deep breath to prepare for the Uzumakis before heading outside.
"Ugh Iruka is showing me a move?" Naruto seemed very unhappy about that. "You said it was someone who knew tons of cool moves!"
"And I'm sure Iruka does!" Rōzu had swapped into their workout outfit, something he knew Mizuki would bring up the next day.
"I am a chuunin Naruto, they don't give just anyone these vests you know."
"Fine, what move are you gonna show us?"
"The clone technique."
"BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO" Naruto was clearly very happy to hear that.
"It is a fundamental technique that all ninja should know!"
"It's lame! Sasuke's learning the Fireball jutsu!"
"Well I'm sorry he's learning that from his brother and not me!"
"Ok how about" Rōzu stepped between them both. "We do the clone one and then a cool one?"
"What's the cool one going to be, I want to know before making any kind of deal, otherwise it's entrapment."
"Where did you learn that?" Iruka was surprised by his sudden, but correct, outburst.
"Mom."
"Why?"
"I like my boy to be prepared in any kind of deal scenario."
"Uh huh, well, the cool one will be, uh" Iruka didn't actually have too many jutsu, and none that Naruto would find cool.
"The Waterball jutsu!" Rōzu threw a technique name out. "Which will be super cool since it beats the Fireball jutsu."
"Hm" Naruto pondered this while Iruka gave them a panicked look. "Acceptable."
"Of course, you might not be able to get the clone technique down in one day" Iruka tried to cover this now since he really didn't want to help Naruto learn a technique that was actually dangerous. "So the Waterball one might come another day."
"Fine, but I wanna see it today at least."
"Yeah of course sure thing no problem" Iruka really hoped Rōzu knew that jutsu, since he didn't. "But for now, the floor is Iruka's."
"The clone technique is one of the most basic techniques out there" Iruka quickly flashed through the three handseals for it as two more of him appeared. "The clones aren't tangible, so it's mostly used for distractions."
"This seems really easy, the Waterball jutsu will be mine today!" Naruto poorly went through the handseals and created a poof of smoke.
"I'm not so sure about that" Iruka looked at the one Naruto that was there after the smoke cleared. "Ok, I'm going to show Rōzu how to do it now, then you can learn from them."
"Fine whatever I wasn't even trying that time" Naruto sat down and sulked over his failure.
"Don't sweat it kid, not everyone is a natural genius like me" Rōzu also went through the handseals and made a cloud of smoke.
"Well, genius might not be the right word" he looked at the part of a clone they produced. "How'd you get it to only make feet?"
"I wasn't even really trying so this is like a really good result" they tried to save face in a very familiar way.
"Just, watch me again" he went through the three seals slower this time. "Ram, snake, tiger."
"Raaaaaam, snake, tiger" they followed along after him.
"Good, now just put some chakra into it."
"Right, just gotta put chakra into it" they stuck out their tongue a little in concentration and went through the seals again.
"Well" Iruka looked at the floating arm they made this time. "It's an improvement I guess?'
"Listen it's been awhile, save your judgements ok!" they tried again.
"Two feet this time, keep it up mom!" Naruto was surprisingly encouraging as he said that.
After forty more attempts they had managed to produce the entire lower body of a clone. Iruka was finding it increasingly harder to believe they were once a higher ranked ninja than him.
"Are you putting enough chakra into it?"
"I am putting an amount of chakra into it."
"Have you tried putting in more?"
"You know, I hadn't thought of that" they gave him a quick glare before being obscured by smoke.
"That was actually worse than the last attempt" he looked at the knees they produced.
"Listen, this is much harder than it looks!"
His only reply was to create two clones of himself once again and look them in the eyes.
"Ok well, shut up."
He rolled his eyes as they grumbled at him. He couldn't believe they'd spun him some stupid story about being a body guard to a princess and he'd eaten it up. Thanks to his sudden cynical spiral he failed to notice the two extra handseals they did before the clone jutsu. As they were engulfed by a much larger cloud he paid attention once again.
"There we go" they were surrounded by five copies of themself. "Damn, does this shirt really have a stain on the back?'
Iruka blinked in surprise. As the various clones of them goofed around in front of him he tried to figure out what could have changed between these attempts. As they turned to say something to Naruto he noticed some black marks that began to fade by their right shoulder.
"See easy peasy, I just messed it up so you won't feel embarrassed."
"Well I only messed up so you wouldn't look dumb messing up" Naruto hopped up to his feet. "I bet I can do it in like five tries."
Iruka watched Rōzu help Naruto with the jutsu. Those marks didn't show up again while they worked with him, but he didn't take his eyes off them. It took him close to a hundred tries before he managed to make a full clone. Of course this clone looked dead and couldn't move.
"That so counts!" Naruto pointed at the clone. "It's a full clone!"
"Naruto, my baby boy, my sweet child" Rōzu pressed their hands together. "I don't think a clone like that would do shit for you in any situation."
"Ugh you just don't wanna teach me the Waterball jutsu so you're making excuses" Naruto folded his arms indignantly. "I bet you can't even do it!"
"Uh first of all, we had a deal and secondly" they held the tiger seal for a moment before blasting a large ball of water into a nearby tree.
Iruka just kept staring. Whatever issues they'd had with chakra before had clearly ended, and he was sure it was related to that mark.
"I feel we should probably call it day for now, Iruka probably has other stuff to do right?' Rōzu said this while Naruto furiously kept trying to make a living clone behind them.
"No way!" he was surrounded by more smoke. "I gotta get my hands on that move!"
"I think your mom's right Naruto, you probably shouldn't try and make clones this many times in an hour."
"I can so keep going watch this!" he tried it once again and made an even larger cloud, as it faded there were now two Narutos face down on the ground.
"Well, it is more convincing when you do it that way" Rōzu's hand phased through one of them.
"This is generally why we hold off on teaching them ninjutsu" Iruka moved to help them grab the real Naruto but Rōzu picked him up surprisingly easily. "Well you seem like you're more than fine after all that."
"Oh uh, yep, totally fine!"
"After all that struggling to make some legs, but you really good at the Waterball jutsu it seems."
"I mean, really good might be a stretch, I'd say pretty good for sure though."
"So I can assume you were just pulling my leg before?" he let his annoyance slip into his tone. "Did you have a good laugh?"
"Maybe tone it down a little there bucko, I just had my limiter on still."
"Your limiter?"
"Yea, so no sensory types can find me by my chakra, they make me weaker though. Gonna be a real pain in the ass to put this one back on though."
"Why didn't you just take it off to begin with?"
"Because I am vain and didn't think I'd need to, but apparently they are very good at making me weak."
"Seriously?"
"Yeah why would I lie about this?"
"I'm really just used to you lying to me about literally everything."
"Well that's not fair, I didn't lie about everything, I just didn't share before."
"That is like the most technical of technicalities and you know it."
"Yeah well, shut up. I still don't know anymore about Naruto's family and aside from Kakashi you're the only person here I actually kind of trust."
That made Iruka stop in his tracks, both figuratively and literally. Considering all he'd really done for them was lie about Naruto being a Jinchūriki, it felt odd to hear them say that.
"Thank you."
"Oh shut up" this got him to stop once again. "I just said I trust you, don't think I'm falling in love with you or anything corny like that. 'Thank you,' what a lame thing to say."
He decided to let them head off alone after that, partially because he felt offended from what they said, and because he felt bad. Against all odds they had actually opened up to him, and he wasn't even willing to tell them probably the most important thing about Naruto that he knew. It left a sour taste in his mouth. He'd already been planning to drink today, but maybe he would get a few extra for the guilt.