Chapter 16

The Reformed Menace

Having somehow gotten out of Hell and back into the factory, Marine opened a door to a room where the YouTuber, Elliot Swann sat on the floor injured. A pool of blood formed on the floor beneath him, although he had no visible injuries to bleed out from. But he did have an idea where the man was bleeding from.

Elliot called out to Marine, "Hey you." Marine approached him as he continued. "I remember you. You—" He was cut off by a few throat-destroying coughs. "You des—" More violent coughs. "You destroyed my computer.

Marine knelt in front of Elliot, his face displaying an apologetic look.

Elliot breathed with difficulty as he continued to speak. "You may have ruined my YouTube career, but I'll be able to forgive you if you can stop your sergeant from destroying everything." He winced in pain as he adjusted his sitting position. "He slapped my butt so hard that I'm dying. My buddy went after him. So if you ever find him, could you do me a favor?"

Marine nodded. He was all for fulfilling a dying man's wishes, so long as they were reasonable.

"Could you continue my youTube channel and maybe… I dunno, like…" He struggled to find words. Then he gestured towards his face. "You could remove my face. You could pretend you're me."

That sounded like the least reasonable demand Marine had ever received from a dying man.

"I mean, I'm totally fine with that. I'm gonna be dead soon anyway, so, like… yeah."

Marine had no desire to do such a thing.

Elliot adjusted his position again, the agony apparent on his face. "My butt hurts so bad. Yeah, I'm gonna die from that. You can die from butt injuries. Definitely."

Marine just about had enough of the weirdness that was going on in this facility, so he decided to leave Elliot to die alone.

"I'm-a sneakin'," Jack Campbell said as he sneaked through a series of hallways, looking for Butt-Slapping Bob. The halls were quiet and practically empty, save for a few tentacles growing out of the walls.

Jack spoke again, but much louder this time, almost shouting. "I'm being very quiet as to not alert the guards to my location!" Then he screamed at the top of his lungs, "I'm being quiet!"

"Okay, it seems I wasn't quiet enough," the voice of Jack Campbell said as Marine rounded a corner to find the man laying on the floor, a puddle of blood forming under his butt. Marine had been following the sound of idiotic yelling. Now he finally found the source: Jack, another victim of Butt-Slapping Bob's butt-slapping.

Jack took notice as Marine walked closer to him. "I'm trying to find your boss. He ate the chicken nuggets and he's evil now." The dying man pointed at Marine. "You must stop him. I'm gonna lay here and take a nap."

Jack laid his head down and closed his eyes. Unfortunately, instead of taking a nap, the older man had succumbed to his butt injuries, his breathing stopped, and his body stilled. Marine didn't feel anything for him, however, because he wasn't a particularly important character in this story. So he continued down the hallway and entered a large room.

There, in the middle of the room, was what looked like his boss, but he was mutated into something horrible. His body's shape was so distorted, it was hardly even recognizable. His torso was merged with what looked like the base of a tank, with the treads to fit. He reminded Marine of the Doom Hunter from Doom Eternal, which wasn't released when this dub was made, but Bob looked a lot uglier, like something out of Resident Evil.

The abomination waved his arms in the air as he shouted gleefully, "I've been reformed?" He lowered his arms. "I'm tired of slapping butts, and of being evil, so I'm gonna just lay here and take a nap." He slumped forward and instantly fell asleep.

Marine had a hard time believing that his boss had changed his ways. But seeing as he was out of jail, he decided to give him the benefit of the doubt. But he felt a little puzzled as he said to himself, "Geez, why is everyone so tired and wanna take a nap all the time?"