Shards
A/N: This chapter is really just a setup for next chapter, and only the very last part is important. So skip to the last chunk if you don't fancy reading a written version of something you've already experienced.
The afternoon began the same as many past and many to come, and the hosts let out a 'Welcome ladies!' to all their guests.
It was a mostly normal day after all, but club was outside for a flower viewing reception.
While Haruhi, Mori, and Hunny, had worn more tradition Japanese clothing, Tamaki, Kyouya, and the twins, had opted for a more western take with outfits resembling that of waiters.
After all, in Tamaki's words, what were they if not servants to the whims of love?
(A few girl were close to fainting before they even took their seats)
Frivolities ensued among the many wealthy students, but Haruhi was too busy entertaining some girls to scoff at Tamaki asking a guest which teacup she wished to use (they all would have held tea just the same). Kaoru spilled tea on himself (It was hardly any at all), and Hikaru insisted on kissing his finger better while Kaoru stared at him through thick eyelashes. Kyoya managed to sell pictures of the hosts to some very... frustrated girls. The pictures were surely taken without anyone in the club knowing, but money was money. Interestingly enough, there was no Kyoya album.
This went mostly unnoticed though, as Haruhi was sitting with Mori and Hunny, watching the the miniature senior pulverize what remained of the former food he had been attempting to mix*. There was hardly any left, and Haruhi furrowed her brows.
'Is someone going to tell him? Should I tell him?'
The girls he was entertaining would surely not, they were far too invested in the sheer gusto with which he approached a usually mundane act.
Before she could decide, Mori spoke up.
"Mitsukuni." He leaned forward toward the bowl, and consequently Hunny "You overdid it."
'He said it!' Haruhi watched in amazement.
Hunny looked more shocked than anything, and hardly reacted besides ceasing his movements. Then his eyes began to fill with tears, and his guests panicked. The girl nearest to him quickly grabbed the abandoned bowl and brought it to her lips.
The farther girl spoke for the two of them.
"It's just the right amount for the both of us, how'd you know? Any more would've been too much!"
"Really?" The blond perked up immediately, and there was no sign of his former sadness.
Haruhi let out a sigh of relief.
When she finally had a moment of peace, Haruhi stood and stared at the falling sakura petals. She took a moment to simply breathe.
This was interrupted by Tamaki's overly romantic nonsensities, delivered with far too much confidence for someone who thought themselves the recipients father.
"Haruhi, how are you doing? Are you having a good time? The flower viewing is going over quite well."
His back was toward her, and she was sure he was modeling it after some shoujo manga. No doubt the girl had many handsome men after her, and was completely oblivious to it all until she read some love quiz from one of her few female friends magazines.
Bah, like that would ever happen.
"Even so, it's rather daunting spending more time doing the admiring then being admired."
Though he was clearly trying his darndest to deny this reality.
"Wow senpai, you're really blooming in more ways than one."
"You noticed! Yes, my beauty is in full bloom today!" He smiled "In fact, I'm sure you'll fall for me soon."
'This guy is so oblivious to the world.'
Yet any other ridiculous things that might've some from him were interrupted by the twins. Hikaru had pulled her closer to his chest by the crook of his right arm placed across near her breastbone, and Kaoru was gently holding her wrist.
"Have you decided your elective courses for this term?" They asked in sync
"How about conversational french?" Kaoru suggested
"I'm not sure."
"I think the three of us should take it together." Hikaru agreed "It makes perfect sense."
Then the two redheads turned to face Tamaki and finished in unison.
"We are in the same class."
Something the blond was quite sensitive over (what wasn't he sensitive over?), sending him to a fetal position at the base of a tree.
"Mommy dear?"
Haruhi's mouth formed a small 'oh' of confusion.
"Mommy?"
"Based on club standing, I would assume that is me." Kyoya explained without facing any of them "What is it now, daddy?"
"I have a theory. Of course, it's just my hypothesis, but it seems that by being in the same class Hikaru and Kaoru are able to spend more time with their sister than I do. They might get close to her, and if that happens-"
"You just now realized that?"
It seemed Kyoya had come prepared with two pie charts to show where the just how large a difference class time made for those scoundrels, and to show how easy it would be for them to corrupt her.
Tamaki's paternal instincts kicked in and he took Haruhi by her shoulders.
"Listen Haruhi, I want you to stop spending time with those shady twins! We can't go on hiding the fact that you're a girl any longer!" Righteous stream of tears flowed down his flawless cheeks "Daddy wants you to return to the girl you used to be, and surround yourself with girl friends so you can have a wholesome life!"
"No need to rush anything, she'll be found out soon enough." Hikaru stated
"Physical exams are the day after tomorrow." Kaoru explained
"Physical exams?" Haruhi questioned
Physical exams meant taking off their shirts, and she was sure the girls would be flocking to see that.
"Oh yeah, I forgot. No doubt about it then, guess they're going to know I'm a girl." She mused
The hosts were less indifferent.
After all, Haruhi was there secret princess, and no other boys would be allowed to know of her sheer adorableness.
The large yellow dress shows just how small her frame is, and Tamaki smiles.
She's looking oh so cute while she stands there with a small braid made from a bit of her hair.
"Were you waiting long?" He asks
The sparkles, oh the sparkles!
He runs a hand through his hair
"What's the matter? You look a little down."
"Th-They're all staring at me... It's just so embarrassing."
A strawberry blush fills her cheeks.
He pulls her close by her waist and tilts her jaw toward him. For this, she would need to look into his eyes.
"They're looking at you because you're lovely. Don't you worry, I promise to protect you no matter what."
"Oh, senpai."
"He must be having a great day dream!" Hunny smiles
"He's kinda creeping me out."
"Envious Hikaru? It's all part of my strategy, while you've wasted time blinded by jealousy, I've forseen the outcome of this charade." He stood before continuing "This anime is obviously a romantic school comedy! Haruhi and I are the main characters, so that means we're love interests?"
"What about us Tama-chan?"
"You boys are the homosexual supporting cast!" He somehow drew a line on the floor with a stick ("Where did you even get that?") "Please make sure that you don't cross this line."
"Listen boss,"
"I don't think you get it." The twins chimed
"If word gets out that Haru-chan is really a girl, then she won't be able to be in the host club anymore."
Tamaki froze
"I bet if Haru-han wore girls clothes she'd be even cuter than she is now!" Hunny gave Usa-chan a happy squeeze.
Kyouya was unfazed as he delivered the killing blow.
"I'm not entirely sure all of you understand either. The schools Haruhi attended during middle and primary did not offer any basic swimming lessons, which are compulsory at Ouran. Despite only needing the most basic of abilities to pass, Haruhi would have to go in the water. Suppose we managed to sneak her through the physical exams, someone will eventually notice that blank box of hers and ask to test it. She'll be exposed as female no matter what if that happens, and goodness knows there might be some unsavory figures out there who would be so interested if they found out had a mermaid, considering they're thought to be extinct."
Ah, yes, that might be an issue.
Really though, how insensitive of him to point out the part they'd all been avoiding.
A/N: Death.
When I typed Kyoya saying Daddy I swear I felt it in every crevice of my being, and it hurt. One does not simply say 'daddy' if their name begins with J and ends with Michael Tatum.
*Does anybody know what that was? I couldn't figure it out because I'm a dummy who doesn't know how google works. I could ask my Mother because she might know, but my communication skills are non-existent.
A few colleges and high schools in certain countries do actually have compulsory swim lessons. Google told me that if a school in Japan has the facilities, it will give them in primary school usually, as high school is not actually required. I'm just going to assume most kids opt out with a note from their private swim couch at Ouran, and it's really just a formality.
The swim thing wouldn't even be a big deal, but we're going to assume Ouran gets it's kids into good colleges based on not only money but also great education, and passable physical abilities.
Is it cliche and should I not have done it? Probably, but it's not going to be changing.
Word count for the story part is 1,481 words.
-Lucas_Gilbert