Chapter 8 - Don't You Worry 'Bout Me
Arizona, Callie, and Sofia are in New York for a week now. The first few days felt more like a vacation for them. Sofia has been enjoying the city really well. She particularly likes hanging out in the park. She had fun going to art museums, watching a Broadway show, visiting iconic places that they only see in movies. They did all these while looking for apartments around the city.
Back in Seattle, she usually goes back and forth between daycare, Grey-Sloan, Meredith's house, her school, her ballet class, and at home. Sofia doesn't get to see much outdoors. Having two busy surgeon moms makes it almost impossible to see both of them in the same room on any given day. In fact, since her moms' divorce, she didn't get to spend time with all three of them together. Well, having them together in a room without hearing them fight or argue over something - that's a whole different thing. To Sofia, having both her moms and their undivided attention, made her feel like being in New York is a utopia. Anytime her moms don't fight is a good day for her and being in one place altogether is the cherry on top.
Arizona knows that she only has two more weeks left to make the most of her time with Sofia. After that, the next time she'll see her would be on Christmas break. She doesn't even know yet how to make that work since holidays in the hospital usually are the busiest days. Pregnant moms and kids aren't spared from being accident-prone during those times. Arizona doesn't want to deal with those yet. She wanted her daughter to feel all the love she has for her while she's in the city. This is the first time they will be miles apart from each other for a long period of time. It's not going to be easy for her and it most certainly is not going to be a walk in the park for Sofia. As for right now, they are happy. Arizona is happy spending all her time and attention to Sofia. She wishes she could say the same for Callie.
"Okay, Callie? I have to say it." Arizona told Callie while they are both looking over the fliers and brochures of the schools they're going to check out this week. Arizona has been observing Callie since that afternoon when they came across Penny at the park. She noticed that Callie's with her and Sofia physically but her mind is somewhere else - or with someone else. Arizona knows Callie too well to be wrong about her.
"Say what?" Callie asked. Her mind is all over the place lately. She doesn't even know why. She is just trying to focus on what needs to be done so Arizona's stay won't be a waste. Thinking about Penny and what she meant when she said they need to talk makes her overthink. So it's better for her to get herself busy with apartment hunting and now looking for schools for their daughter instead.
"You've been acting weird. You know...since Penny talked to you...at the park." Arizona said while sitting across from Callie at the living room space in their hotel room. She quietly stares at the countless times Callie has sorted the brochures at the table and yet they still end up scattered.
"Wha...I'm not!" Callie whining told Arizona. It made the blonde titter because Callie is trying to avoid eye contact so she won't see that there is definitely something bothering her.
Arizona scoffs and rolls her eyes at Callie's response, "Come on! Talk to me. What's going on? What's wrong?" The blonde then grabbed and held both Callie's hands to stop her from pointlessly rearranging the brochures.
Callie groaned and said, "Ugh! I hate you." And then she exhaled sharply, feeling defeated by the blue eyes staring back at her with those charming smiles.
Arizona likes the feeling of winning and being right. At that very moment, she feels them both. Looking all cute and adorable, she said "Ha! No, you don't. Come on. Spill." And then she gently let go of Callie's hands.
Callie inhales sharply and lets it out quickly like forcing herself to just let loose. "She said that we need to talk. She's been asking me to since..you know...at the airport." She looks at Arizona, to see how she would react. Callie knows Arizona is being supportive to her but the blonde can only take so much especially on the subject of her love life.
"So why don't you two talk?" Arizona curiously asked. She signed up for this, to be Callie's friend and part of which is being there for her even when she is having problems with another woman. No matter how uncomfortable it is for her. If she's being honest with herself, she thinks that what she's doing is ridiculous. There could be people lining up for her but then here she is being a saint for her ex-wife.
"What? Uh! Because...you flew all the way here to help me and Sofia. It doesn't seem right to go date Penny while you and Sofia are...you know what I mean." Callie said finding it silly that Arizona is even asking why. Quite frankly, Callie really just wanted to avoid Penny all together. She's never been the confrontational type. She'll try to avoid talking things through for as long as she can until there's no other way but to talk. That's what she's trying to do - she's stalling until she runs out of excuses.
"You know you'll keep doing this..." Arizona gestures her hands all over Callie's body like she's pointing out all the weirdness the Latina has been doing. "...until you two get to talk." The blonde continues and nods like she's trying to make Callie realize that she's right because she is.
"If I were you, I'd go talk to her so I'd no longer have to be anxious about it," Arizona told Callie while wearing a crazed smile. She knows the Latina gets what she's trying to say. She also knows that she's winning this conversation by knockout.
"So why don't you…" Arizona continues as she hands Callie her phone. "...call or text her and tell her to meet you tomorrow for a coffee so you two could talk." Arizona then stood up to give Callie some privacy. And also, because she's not interested to hear them talk.
"I hate you!" Callie yelled out kiddingly and then started smiling at her phone in her hand.
The blonde yelled back while walking towards her room. "You know I'm right and I'm awesome."
Arizona came into the room that she shares with Sofia, and found her daughter looking out the window while holding her astronaut barbie. It's almost 9:30 pm and an hour past her bedtime. This concerns Arizona a little bit and wonders if something is bothering Sofia.
"Hey, little miss. Why aren't you sleeping yet?" Arizona asked Sofia. The 8-year-old looked at her mommy with sparkling eyes and a big smile showing off her dimples that are just like Arizona's. The blonde didn't give birth to Sofia but she did breathe life into the little one. Arizona's heart belonged to Sofia from the moment she heard her heartbeat for the very first time. She fell in love with her daughter, even more, when she first laid eyes on her tiny frail body in the same OR where her mama fought so hard to live for her. Sofia gave Mark the will to hold on for as long as he can so he could come home, and he did.
Sofia means wisdom and she sure did give her parents the wisdom they needed. The wisdom to think, not only about themselves and their desires but to also think about the people that they love and to desire only the best for them. To think not only of their own happiness but to give everything to make the people they love and care for their happiness.
Arizona climbed into bed and held Sofia in her arms. Sofia then opened up to her and told her how happy she is that they are all together in this big beautiful city. She told her how thrilled she was with her new roller skate. And all of a sudden, Sofia asked while looking at her mommy's eyes "Mommy? Are we going back to Seattle?"
Sofia thinks that her mommy will be staying with them in New York. Arizona and Callie haven't told her just yet. They wanted to enjoy being together and being in the present for as long as they can. But Arizona couldn't stall or lie into those big brown eyes.
"Sofia? Listen. You will be staying here with mama so she won't be sad and lonely, okay? And then I will go back to Seattle because...remember the tiny humans in their little incubators at work?" Sofia nodded. "They need me to save their lives so their mommies will not be sad and lonely too."
"But what about you? Wouldn't you be sad and lonely?" Sofia asks, now having her arm wrapped around Arizona. The blonde doesn't know how to answer this question. If she's being 100% honest, the thought of leaving Sofia feels like her heart is being ripped out of her chest. But the thought that she will see her again in a few months, and that she is with her other mom is comforting enough.
"I will be sad, sweetie. Thinking about it now makes me sad already because I will miss you all of the time. But I am not gonna be lonely. You know why?" Arizona holds Sofia's chin up so her face is looking up to her. "Because we can always facetime each other, and text, and I can fly here or you can come to visit me. You would be traveling just like me when I was your age. It'll be fun and exciting." Arizona tries to make the thought of her daughter flying back and forth between two different cities sound like an adventure. And that being in an airplane could be something Sofia can tell her friends about too. Sofia believes her mommy, of course. Arizona's optimism always makes a difficult situation seem a whole lot bearable.
Then out of the blue, Sofia asked her again, "Mommy? Will you miss mama too?"
"Of course, sweetie," Arizona said softly.
"Are you ever getting back together?" Sofia asked again.
Arizona sighed softly as she embraced Sofia closer to her. Her daughter's question isn't something that can easily be answered by a yes or no. Nothing about Callie and Arizona's relationship is ever just black and white. Life, for the most part, is grey. You cannot be right and not get something else wrong; you cannot be good at one thing without being bad at another; you cannot be a good person to everyone without being perceived as a bad person by at least someone. Humans are made complex. Thus, life is not always simple. It does not mean, though, that people cannot make it less complicated.
"Your mama and I have tried, honey. But your mama and my love for her, it's like...the sand. The more I hold on tight to a handful of sand in my palm, the more the sand falls off." Arizona explained as she leaned her head to Sofia while stroking her dark brown hair. "Mama has to stretch her wings and feel the air, and fly. If she comes back home - I hope she'll come back to where she truly belongs."
"Callie. Hi!" Penny greeted the Latina as she walked into the cafe. Callie paced in her room far too long and toasted every piece of clothing she had packed to find the perfect outfit for her date with Penny. At least that's what she thinks about them meeting for a coffee today. Penny seemed calm and pretty composed when Callie saw her. She was all settled at a cozy cafe seated at a table for two by the window.
"Hey! How are you? I know - I know I'm late. Sorry." Callie told Penny while putting her jacket on the back of the chair, and then finally sat across the redhead.
"No no no...it's fine. I'm doing great. It's my time off at the research center today. So perfect timing, I must say. How's everything going with you?" Penny said.
"That's great! Well, we've looked at some apartments and have narrowed them down into a few choices. But I think Sofia has already decided which one she likes. We're gonna look for a school next. What about you? How's Preminger research going?" Callie asked Penny while feeling that flutter again just by looking back at her. Her conversation with the redhead is something Callie loves about her. It's always smooth and easy with her. They never run out of something to talk about. And Callie misses that.
"It's - it's…. Uhm, Callie? What...are you doing here? In New York." Penny didn't really want to beat around the bush. She's always been straightforward and direct. There are times she couldn't find words to express how she's feeling inside but when she does, she goes right on it. That's one of the many things she has in common with Callie.
"I...aah...I - I came here...for you." Callie laughed awkwardly. She is surprised by the way Penny asked.
"Callie, I'm involved now. I'm seeing someone. I - I figured that when you broke up with me and stayed in Seattle...I thought you didn't want to be with me anymore. I - I didn't think that you'd come here." Penny explained. At this point, the smile on Callie's face instantly meltdown into a frown. The brunette didn't hear the rest after Penny said she was seeing someone. It's like someone poured a pail of ice water on Callie.
"Oh! Okay! That's - that's great. Great! I...I think I...I have to - I gotta go." Callie stammers, gathers her stuff, and gets out of the cafe as fast as she can.
Callie could not believe what just happened. "Did I uproot my whole life and my family's life for nothing? How did I end up here? How can I be so messed up? Did I move too fast? Again?" All these thoughts came flooding into her mind as she walked around the city. She doesn't know where to go. She doesn't even know anyone in New York. "God, what am I gonna tell, Arizona and Sofia? This is - this is...oh! What am I gonna do?" Callie thought to herself while standing on a corner street.
Suddenly, Callie's phone rang. It was Meredith. The Latina answered the call almost immediately as soon as she saw Meredith's name. She told Callie that she needs help in finding a lawyer. Mer knows that Callie's mom owns a law firm and that she could get someone for her.
"What? Wait? Why would you be needing a...what did you do?" Callie asked Mer. She told the Latina that it wasn't for her. Alex needs a lawyer to represent him in court. Meredith told the whole story about Karev finding De Luca on top of Jo, who was drunk, which made Karev blacked out and beat up De Luca so badly that he's bedridden with half an eyesight. Now, De Luca is pressing charges against Karev and he could go to jail. It is that bad and thus, the need for a lawyer - a good one.
"Oh god! Alex. I'll make a call and then I'll call you right back." Rattled, worried, and overwhelmed by what she just heard, Callie immediately dialed her mom's secretary at the law firm. As soon as Callie got the details, she forwarded them to Mer and called her right back. It was then Callie knew that the charges would be given by tomorrow morning. Good thing Callie's mom owns the firm and the lawyer that the secretary provided would not be able to refuse an urgent request for the child of the owner.
As soon as Callie got off the phone with Meredith, she saw Arizona's text telling Callie to meet her and Sofia at the Kempner Playground. So she went there by foot to shake the nerves from everything that just happened for the past 30 mins.
Arizona was taking pictures of Sofia playing while waiting for Callie to get to where they're at. It's kind of a double purpose. She got to take photos of her daughter that she can show off to the folks back in Seattle, and she has something to look at when she misses Sofia. After a few minutes, Arizona noticed Callie approaching them. The Latina does not look as thrilled and enthusiastic as Arizona expected her to be after finally talking with Penny.
"Hey! How was it? Is everything with Penny okay now?" Arizona took her eyes off from watching Sofia and greeted Callie, all smiles and chirpy.
"Uhmm. It was...It was… You know what? Why don't we take a seat? Okay?" Callie said, having no intention of talking to Arizona about what went down with her and Penny.
"Listen, I've spoken to Meredith," Callie told Arizona looking at her eye to eye. The blonde's face gradually became serious and the smile she was wearing slowly vanished. "You were right about Karev. He did beat up De Luca and now De Luca is pressing charges." The brunette continued. Arizona could not form a word as she was so shocked about what she heard. She didn't want to be right.
Before Arizona was able to put her feelings into words, both ladies suddenly heard Sofia scream. The young Latina sounded hurt that Arizona and Callie jolted. They both quickly stood up from the park bench and hurriedly looked for their daughter.
"Oh god! Oh god! I took my eyes off of her for two seconds! Two seconds!" Arizona said worriedly, talking out loud while looking for Sofia who's now crying in pain.
"SOFIA!" Callie yelled out as soon as she saw the little one sitting up on the ground crying so loud, with blood streaming down from her forehead down to her cheek. Callie is in panic and so worried as she tries to ask Sofia what happened without sounding the same way as she feels inside. The Latina needs to sound and look calm so Sofia won't be any more scared than she already is.
Arizona didn't know what to do. She froze at the sight of Sofia. Callie needed to yell at her to call 911. The car crash came flashing back to Arizona's mind: Callie has gone through the windshield, laying face down on top of the hood of the car, covered with broken glasses and gasping for air; Sofia's tiny fragile body with no heartbeat and barely breathing. Arizona's heart started pounding so fast as she dials 911, her gaze fixed at Sofia.
"SOFIA! SOFIA!" Callie kept yelling. Sofia stopped crying and suddenly fell into Callie's arms, unconscious. Callie suddenly felt her hand was damped. Her daughter is bleeding from the back of her head.
Author's Notes: I am loving all your comments/reviews and I'm not even kidding. I am with you all. I have some more exciting stuff coming your way. So hold on tight! :) And as usual, give me all your feelings and thoughts about this chapter.