"What do we have?" Meredith asked, flipping through the chart as she and April headed to the room.
"Elias Waldon, twenty-three, unexplained seizure at work. No known history. The patient is currently unconscious." April said as she pulled the curtain around.
"Okay, I want him in four-point restraints." Meredith said.
"Thats not the protocol," April whispered, seeing Meredith visibly shaking.
"I dont care what the protocol says," Meredith started. "I want him in at least two-point restraints at the very minimum." April nodded her head as she headed to grab the restraints. Even though it wasnt protocol, she understood that Meredith wanted to make sure her life and her babys life wouldn't be in jeopardy again. After April came back with the restraints, she and Meredith placed them on the patient. Meredith walked forward, checking Elias's pupils for a reaction, her hand shaking.
"Okay, pupils are equal and reactive," Meredith choked out, grabbing his wrist to check his pulse.
She didnt have time to react before she was being pulled up by her shirt. She felt as her body hit the wall, sliding down.
She shook her head, trying to push her thoughts away. Hes restrained, he cant hurt me, she thought to herself. Okay, get him to C.T., Meredith ordered, pulling her gloves off. She blew out a breath, heading out of the room. April followed, concerned for her colleague and friend.
She closed her eyes as her hair was pulled and she was sent sliding into the trauma cart on the other side of the room.
Flashbacks ran through her head as she leaned her head against the wall, trying to remind herself she was safe.
"Meredith, are you alright?" Aprils voice startled her.
"Um, yeah." Meredith said as she cleared her throat. "We need to rule out possible stroke, possible brain tumors or lesions. Tell me more about his history."
April nodded, not wanting to push the issue and make Meredith upset. She looked down at the patients chart. "So, he has no history of alcohol dependency, his blood sugar looks good, hes not on medications nor has he ever been drug dependent. We called his wife who was listed as his emergency contact and she said he has no history of seizures."
"Alright, well see what the C.T. shows and if the scans come back clean, I would like to do a spinal tap to rule out meningitis." Meredith said, starting to walk away as April gently grabbed her arm.
"Are you sure youre alright? I could have someone else take over. Its no problem." April spoke softly.
"No, Im a doctor and this is my job." Meredith smiled softly.
The results came back a little while later and as Meredith looked them over, she shook her head. "Okay, nothing is signifying anything obviously wrong. Hes not showing signs of meningitis but I would do a spinal tap just to rule it out." They both headed back into the room and Merediths heartbeat quickened. "Why have the restraints been removed?" She asked.
"They must have removed them in order to do the C.T.," April muttered. She got to work putting the restraints back on before Meredith fully entered the room.
"Meredith, Im going to grab supplies, Ill be right back." April said. She peaked around Meredith, seeing Callie at the desk.
"Callie," April called, ripping her gloves off as she exited the room. Once the door closed, Merediths breathing started to become heavy. She backed herself up against the wall, glancing around for something she could protect herself with. She frantically reached into the drawer next to her, taking a scalpel out as she held it to her side, her knuckles turning white as she gripped onto the blade.
She had barely managed to get to her knees before another blow was delivered, this time to her ribs. A blow so hard that she swore she could feel the rib break.
"Meredith?" She heard her name be called. "Mer, are you alright?" Callie asked as she slowly approached the blonde, her eyes flickering between Meredith and the blade. Slowly she reached out, taking Merediths hand into hers that was holding the scalpel.
"Meredith, hand it to me," Callie ordered gently but firmly. Merediths face was dripping sweat, her eyes unfocused as she looked around. Her chest feeling like all the air was being sucked out of her.
"I-I have to get out of here," Meredith choked out.
"Okay, I can help you. Just give me the blade, Mer." Callie ordered once again. With one swift move, Meredith deposited the scalpel into Callies hand before bolting out of the room.
"Alex," Callie called.
"Hey, whats up?" Alex smiled lightly, unprepared for what Callie was going to say next.
"Alex, you need to check on Meredith. She and April had a patient with unexplained seizures and shes having flashbacks. I walked in on her holding a scalpel in self defense but the patient was in four-point restraints. I should report this to the chief but Im not going to because I cant say if I went through what she did I wouldn't react the same. But please, keep an eye on her. I dont know where her mind went, Alex. She looked terrified." Callie said sadly.
"Alright, Ill find her. Thanks for telling me," Alex said. He walked away in search of Meredith. He checked every room but was unable to find her.
Meredith was sitting on the floor in a supply closet. Her knees were drawn up to her chest as her breathing became heavier with each passing moment. She couldn't shake the feeling she had. Hopelessness, fear, terror. It was hard to pinpoint which one.
A knock at the door made her gasp as her eyes squeezed shut.
"Mer, you in there?" She tried to reply but nothing was coming out. As she opened her eyes, she could see the light illuminating in as the door slowly opened. "Mer? You alright?" Alex asked, shutting the door behind him. He got down on the ground beside her, pulling her into his side as she struggled to catch her breath.
"I-I cant," she sobbed. "I-I thought I was over this."
"Hey, youre okay, Mer." Alex soothed. He rubbed his hand up and down her back, trying to get her to take a breath. "Everything is okay," he whispered. "Its over, youre safe." He reached behind him onto a shelf and grabbed a bag, handing it over to Meredith. He watched as she inhaled and exhaled using the bag, her breathing slowly evening out.
"I thought I was past this, I thought I was okay." Meredith sobbed.
"Its okay to not be okay, Mer. Its going to take time." Alex said. "You gotta calm down for your baby's sake, Mer."
"I'm trying," Meredith whimpered. She laid her head on Alexs shoulder, blowing out a breath. "Thanks for being here for me, Alex."
"Always, Mer. Ill always be here for you." Alex whispered.