Hello again!
Posting a little early in case ffn decides to stop working.
All my love to Fran and my prereaders always!
Edward
Four days.
Four days is all it takes for Willow Creek, North Carolina, to become my favorite place in the world.
Back in college, I decided to spend a semester abroad, thinking it would broaden my thinking of the world and bring me experiences I could only dream of. I was right – I had studied and traveled Europe as much as I could that semester, seeing things I had learned about in history books and lectures. I had walked inside the Colosseum in Rome, saw the remains of the people in Pompeii, and put a toe into the Mediterranean Sea. Still, it was Willow Creek, North Carolina – a little over four hours from home, where I found yet another, and easily the most amazing world wonder of them all.
Four days, a little sun and sand mixed in with some unpacking and organization, and a Carolina rainstorm was what led me to meet her, creating a butterfly effect that would change my life into something completely unexpected.
Lauren, the girl who made me swear off anything to do with women or relationships, was long forgotten the minute I caught the eye of the girl in the library.
I didn't wake up this morning with the intention of meeting someone. Hell, I'm barely settled into my new place, and work is my priority. Leaving notes for a girl in the library is not something I thought I'd ever do, especially now, when I'm so focused on getting my life back into some semblance of normalcy.
I left her a fucking note. Unbelievable. I feel like I'm twelve-years-old again instead of twenty-four, slipping something into a girl's locker instead of behind the front desk at the local public library. That in itself is something I'd never thought I'd say in my life, either, and I've gone twenty-four years without ever leaving anything for a girl inside of a library.
That would be because I, myself, had rarely stepped foot inside one of them, and here I am today, four days in a new town and leaving notes for a girl next to a pile of books she had reserved for me.
Who the fuck is this person I've turned into?
I've only known of her existence for a couple of hours, but I already blame Bella for this change in me. Our encounter today was brief, maybe a half-hour or so, and we've been separated longer than our interaction, but I can't get her out of my head.
So much so that I had spent the remainder of my day at work feeling antsy and uncomfortable; glancing at my watch every three minutes to see when I would be able to head home. I needed to get some proof of address for her so I would be able to go back to the library and hopefully again catch a glimpse of Bella.
Once I was able to leave work for the day, I had hopped in my car and thrown it in reverse, hoping she hadn't gone home yet for the day so I could see her. I knew exactly where my signed lease was, which was what I would need in order to get a library card so I would be able to take out the books I needed for the golf outing with my boss on Friday.
I had no idea if Bella would still be there or not, unsure of what time she went in this morning or how her schedule worked. I had no idea if going back there to see her was a good idea or not, but I at least had the decency to admit to myself that I could not have cared less about the books waiting for me. The real reason I was racing to get back there wasn't about the books anymore, but rather for the librarian that helped me find the books in the first place.
Librarian fantasy aside, it had been a long time since I even thought about a girl this way, let alone altered my plans just so I could see her again. It was a simple conversation, nothing more than a comfortable exchange of words two strangers say to one another to pass the time. But it made me wish I didn't have to go back to work. It made me want to continue the conversation, continue talking to her.
I didn't care what we talked about – I just needed to keep talking to her.
I ended up talking to Jessica instead, when I finally made my way back to the library later that evening, my lease in hand, ready to be the next owner of a public library card. It was then I learned that Bella's shift had ended, and she was no longer there. Jessica was pleasant enough to chat with as I filled out the necessary paperwork, offering me a warm smile as she slid the books across the desk for me once they had officially been checked out under my name.
But she wasn't Bella.
I didn't feel anything as I talked to Jessica as she finished with my books. She slid them closer to me, and I noticed my name scrawled on the white paper Bella had used to reserve them. The letters of my name, made with the pen she held in her hand earlier today, were now curled and flowing on the paper she wrote them on. Her handwriting served as a visible reminder that she was real, and my need to talk to her again, see her again, was too. So I snatched the paper before Jessica unknowingly disposed of it in the small garbage can beneath the desk.
"Can I borrow a pen?" I asked abruptly, deciding that shooting my shot and missing was better than not taking a shot at all.
"Oh, yeah. Sure," Jessica agreed, reaching next to her to hand me a black pen.
"Thanks."
I flipped the pen between my fingers for a moment or two, staring at my name written in Bella's handwriting, before turning the paper over to the other side. It was waiting for my words, waiting for some slick pick-up line to grace the page, but truthfully, I had no idea what to say without coming across like an absolute tool. I'd been in a relationship with someone for two years, single for the last thirteen months, and was a little out of practice by choice. But I finally convinced myself that it wouldn't necessarily matter what the words on the page said.
It was the fact that I had acted on impulse to write a note at all that mattered most.
That act alone spoke volumes – to me, and hopefully to Bella.
At least I thought so.
The rain is still falling continuously from the sky as I head home from my trip to the library. For the time being, my note for Bella is in Jessica's safe hands until she gives it to her tomorrow when she comes in for her shift.
Jessica had casually slipped Bella's schedule into the conversation in the same subtle way I had asked her to give my little thank you note to her for helping me with finding my books. Speaking of books, I glance at them sitting next to me on the passenger seat, realizing with a smirk that there's no way I can concentrate on reading when all I can see is the librarian that had given me the books in the first place.
It's hard to believe it was just this morning that I had been flipping out over golfing with my boss this Friday; instead of stressing over my success on the golf course, it's Bella's face I see when I open the books later on that night.
Instead of learning about when to putt and when to swing like Happy Gilmore, I see a hint of a smile on a beautiful face. When I take a sip of my beer and turn the page to see a picture of perfectly manicured green lawns, I see warm, brown eyes swirling with amusement instead. When I pull up an interview on my phone to listen to some words of wisdom from Tiger Woods, I hear her voice; a hidden drawl curling her soft words every now and then on certain pronunciations.
Fuck, I think to myself, rubbing my eyes as if that will blur the image of her from my mind. She's everywhere I look, everything I hear, and everywhere I want to be.
In the time between ending things with Lauren a year ago and meeting Bella today, I hadn't exactly been living like a monk. Brady and I would go out to the bars, meet a few girls along the way to pass the time, but none of them ever crossed my mind again after the evening was over.
Maybe it's because I wasn't ready back then, and I am ready now; I'm not sure, but something inside of me came alive again after seeing Bella this afternoon.
If I want to avoid it, avoid a mess that can happen between people once they truly get to know one another, it seems as if I don't have a choice.
The alternative to seeing Bella again is to not see Bella again.
The thought of that seems nearly impossible.
Without explanation, as if she's calling my name—calling out for me in the darkness, I feel compelled to be with her again, sooner rather than later.
"You don't think it's too much?" Brady questions me the next day through the phone on my lunch break as I squint the Carolina sun away from my eyes. "You just met the girl, what? Yesterday?"
I nod in agreement even though he can't hear me, waving goodbye to some of my coworkers as they head across town to grab a bite to eat. I keep walking and turn in the opposite direction as the rest of them. "It probably is a little too much."
It doesn't stop me.
"So, you're not going?"
"Oh, I'm still going."
I round the corner and see the library in sight.
"You are?" Brady asks in disbelief, obviously having a hard time coming to terms with the sudden change in me.
"Yeah, I'm here now. Talk to you later."
Unlike yesterday when I had entered the library in a work-induced panic, today I'm walking in there like I'm reaching for a cold glass of water and seeing her is just as refreshing.
The doors swing open as I make my entrance, today's being a little more toned down than the way I made my appearance yesterday. Today I don't bring the weather in on my feet with me, as the rain is already forgotten, and the sun proudly takes its place. It's a little less crowded today yet still just as quiet.
My eyes scan around the open area, landing on the circulation desk with a guy standing behind it at one of the computers. There are books next to him in a small pile on the desk, and he reaches for the pile one book at a time without looking up from his screen as he scans them back into circulation.
I look over to the children's section, notice it's full of tiny spectators as a small group of them listen intently to a story being read by another member of the library staff.
No sign of Bella.
I bring my eyes over to the other side in the direction I had gone yesterday, wondering if that section was her preferred area, and my eyes stop short when I spot her sitting behind one of the computers in nonfiction. There is an eager girl behind her, and the two seem to be working together to find an answer to whatever the patron needs.
Not wanting to stand in front of the door forever just so I could watch her, I drop off my books from yesterday and head over towards the New Arrivals, not far from where Bella is, but close enough so I can watch her from a distance and take her in.
Her hair is pulled up today, off her back and shoulders in loops of curls and waves. It's not messy by any means but still comes across as extremely natural and laid back. Her hair being up today means her neck and ears are exposed, a pair of earrings softly dangling as she continues her animated conversation with the other girl.
Pointing at the screen and writing down the information they see, I watch as Bella moves to rise, the chair sliding soundlessly against the carpet as the two of them disappear down a row in search of the desired book. I take note of the dress she's wearing, respectable in short sleeves and falling to a length appropriate for work but just enough to make me wonder about the mystery beneath it. A pair of sandals at the end of long legs and tanned skin almost has me reaching for the first book I see so that she can check me out.
I'm patient, or so I think I am, as she finishes up with the patron. She spots me as she comes back up the row they disappeared down, her steps slowing with a knowing smile when she sees I'm not bothering to hide that I'm here for her.
"Wow – finished already?" Bella motions behind me, pointing towards the guy at the front desk who is scanning in the books I just dropped off. I turn back and return the smile she's giving me.
"Couldn't put it down; you found me a real page-turner."
"Not my first time," she answers modestly, her head tilting towards the books behind her. "Interested in more?"
She has no idea.
But the way she leans her body against the bookshelf makes me think she absolutely has an idea and knows what she's doing to me. She even looks like she's enjoying it.
"Show me the way."
It isn't a far walk today, not as far as it was yesterday when she had brought me over to the books I had been looking for. When we're standing in front of the golf section again, she stops and opens both hands towards the awaiting selections.
"Have at it," Bella tells me before adding, "I don't think you'll find what you're looking for, though."
I don't move to look at any books just yet; her choice of words hold more meaning than some book on the shelf, and now I'm generally curious. "Why do you think that?"
She shrugs her shoulders and continues. "Well, I think you're focusing on the wrong thing. I mean, I agree that a day with your new boss is a big deal; however, maybe you should focus on strengthening your relationship with him instead of perfecting your golf swing."
I know she's right. I know I'm not truly as bad at the sport as I think I am, but confidence is key, and I like to be prepared.
"He's a great guy; I've known him for a few years now just from seeing him at company functions or parties."
"Then what's the big deal? You think he's going to forget everything he knows about you because you can't make a putt?"
"He doesn't seem like that kind of guy," I admit, "but I just don't want to embarrass myself, that's all."
Bella offers me a small smile and a shake of her head before she tears her gaze away from me, the heat from her stare evaporating in a single instant.
"You won't," she replies, eyes now wandering across the names of the books on the shelves. "Where's he taking you?"
"Some country club around here, I don't know," I answer casually with a shrug of my shoulders. "He loves it, though."
"Must be Hanover," Bella murmurs, returning her face to mine. "It is beautiful; I'll give him that."
The word beautiful becomes an understatement as I look at her in a private row of our own.
"You've been there?" I ask.
She nods. "Just for a few weddings. The banquet hall overlooks the eighteenth hole."
Intrigued, I pull out my phone to Google the images of where I'll be spending my day on Friday. Maybe seeing where I'll be playing will help put me at ease.
"Hanover Country Club…" I mutter under my breath as I view the pictures of the course on my phone, nodding in approval. "Wow, you're right. That course does look pretty amazing."
I turn my phone a little in her direction, and she takes a step so she can get a better look. A step is all that's needed in our little row for her to be closer to me than she was before; close enough that I can smell a faint wisp of her invading my space in the best possible way.
She talks like she has no idea of her effect on me.
"A lot of people prefer that course over some of the other ones we have around here." She's close enough that she has to take a step back so she can see my face. "Just a couple of water spots around the eighth hole or something."
I see the water in the pictures on my phone just as she's telling me this. I close it and place it in my back pocket.
"That's a useful bit of information, Bella. Not something I could have learned from a book."
"Maybe not," she agrees but still turns away again to peruse the shelf in front of us. "There's always something you can learn from a book, though. In your note, you said you wanted to check out some more. Try this one."
"Thanks," I say, taking the book from her hand without so much as looking at the cover. She could have handed me a book on how to watch paint dry, and I would have taken it home with me. My heart stammers in my chest when she mentions the note I left for her last night. "So Jessica gave you the note, yes?"
"It was in my mailbox," Bella explains with a smile, her eyes never leaving mine, "but I had a feeling Jess had something to do with it."
I can tell by her tone that Jessica amuses her.
"You really helped me out yesterday. I was a little on edge, being new in town and the new guy at work. I just wanted to say thank you, and Jessica helped me last night since you had already left."
Bella nods in understanding. "Yeah, yesterday was my early day," she responds, comfortably leaning back against the shelves again.
"You don't have the same schedule every day?"
"It's similar, but not always," she answers with a shake of her head. "We all kind of rotate shifts around here."
I think about her and the other staff members I've seen and the way they all move around here with such ease and comfort.
"It seems like you've been working here for a while."
"A few years now," Bella says before fixing a book that is out of place on the shelf. "Feels like forever, actually."
"You don't look like you mind it."
"I don't. I love it here," she replies with a sigh, looking around at the books surrounding her. She looks so peaceful.
"I can see why," I offer, my eyes trailing at the books the way hers did. "Granted, I haven't exactly visited a lot of libraries in my lifetime, but I think I like it here, too."
My decision is, without a doubt, swayed by the girl in front of me.
"Libraries aren't for everybody. Some people come in here with a specific book in mind – "
"Like me?"
"Yes, like you." Bella shoots me a look that makes us both laugh quietly together in our row. "Other people come in here and let the books find them."
"Which kind of person are you?" I ask her the question even though I think I already know the answer. I can tell she cares by the way she helps people; as if each book has its own history to tell aside from the words on the page.
"Both, I think?" She scrunches her nose in thought. "I like to think so, at least. I like waking up each day and seeing where the day takes me. Which section, what genre, it doesn't matter. I like to be surprised."
Noted.
"Hmm. Surprises in a library. Never thought of those two words together," I tell her honestly, and her little laugh gives life to this tiny section of this tiny library.
"It doesn't always happen. But when it does," her words trickle slowly, coming to a pause as her eyes find their way to mine again, "it's worth the wait."
"I know what you mean," I reply, my voice lower than it was a minute ago; the implication in her words not going unnoticed by either of us.
"I think your boss is in for a big surprise on Friday," Bella says with a clear of her throat. "Still think you're going to hit him in the head with a golf club?"
"Not anymore," I laugh, realizing it won't be the end of the world if I lose a round of golf. Her words remind me of a different matter entirely. "Plus, I have to have clubs in order to throw any his way. Any recommendations around here?"
She nods and starts to make our way out of the row, the change of topic an indication that the book I have in my hand is the only book I'll be checking out.
Today.
"Mike's family owns the sports store around here," Bella tells me when we're almost back at the circulation desk.
"Mike?"
"Mike," she confirms with a nod to the guy who was checking in the books when I arrived. "I'll get you a card on your way out. Directions are on there, even though you can't miss it on 78; biggest store in town."
"I think I saw this on my way in, actually." I think back and can almost see Newton's in my head. "Head south about two miles or so?"
"I'm impressed. You've only been here a few days, and you already know your way around."
She doesn't waste any time making sure I have the book I need for the day, even making sure to hand me one of the business cards from Mike. I thank her for the card and the books, wishing I had something that actually required us to sit down together and research something.
Just as I'm about to leave the desk with my new book in tow, I feel a hand reach out and touch my forearm. The touch of her hand on my skin is almost hotter than the midday sun in July, here in Willow Creek.
"Call me if you get lost."
The smile she gives me when I turn the card over to see her phone number written in her perfect handwriting makes me forget where I'm supposed to go in the first place.
I love reading your thoughts on where this is going and how these four will meet. I'm excited for that moment, but until that can happen, I need to fill in some gaps with Masen and Mary and their past so we better understand their interactions with Edward and Bella, who are just establishing the beginnings of their own relationship.
Join my Facebook group, Lily Jill Fics, for teasers and discussions. I've been dropping teasers for my holiday sequel, Pursuing the Proposal, a sequel to Pursuing the Proposition. I plan on posting one new chapter a day between Christmas Day and New Year's Eve, so if you haven't yet read the original Pursuing the Proposition, get on that before the sequel starts posting!
I'll see you next week!