the following is a non-profit fan-based parody, dragon ball z abridged is own by team four stars, please support the official release
"characters talking"
-show talking-
the day had finally come the girls were in Twilight's room and we're ready to watch the saiyan showdown
"I'm so ready for this," said Rainbow Dash
"c'mon Pinkie start the video," said Applejack
"right on it," said Pinkie pressing play
The following is a fan-based parody. Dragonball, Dragonball Z, and Dragonball GT are all owned by FUNimation, Toei Animation, Fuji TV, and Akira Toriyama. Please support the official release.
(scene opens up at Kame House with Bulma, Master Roshi, Oolong and Puar watching a telecast of Yamcha's death)
-And there you have it, folks. That man is dead. Very, very dead.- said Mr. Kent
-Mr. Kent, if you had to come up with a word for how dead he is, what would it be?- asked Jimmy
-"Cadaverific!"- said Mr. Kent
"poor Yamcha," said Fluttershy
-Yamcha! No! I was saving myself for him!- said Bulma breaking down crying on Master Roshi's chest
-Bulls*t!- said Master Roshi
[OPENING SEQUENCE]
(scene shifts to the battlefield with Krillin being struck with grief over Yamcha's death)
-Yamcha! Yamcha! Yamcha was our friend...and you bastards killed him! Don't worry, Yamcha, I'll avenge you!- said Krillin
"yeah go Krillin show them what happens when they mess with your friends," said Rainbow Dash
-Oh right, you're going to avenge him? The five-year-old over here is stronger than you are!- said Piccolo
"I mean he is not wrong," said Sunset
-But I-- said Krillin
-Face it, you're pretty much here as a meat shield.- said Piccolo making Krillin extremely angry
"they just don' like Krillin," said Applejack
-Ha! Look at him, Vegeta. He's like the Raditz of their group.- said Nappa
-That's it! I can't take it anymore! I can only be pushed so far!- said Krillin
(HUD from Final Fantasy VII appears at the bottom of the screen, selecting "Krillin" and "Limit")
"with the power of a game reference," said Pinkie
(Scatter Shot appears at the top of the screen)
-KRILLIN LIMIT BREEEEEAK!!!!- screamed Krillin shooting his scatter shot
(Battle music from Final Fantasy VII plays as Krillin uses Scatter Shot to kill three Saibamen; Victory music from Final Fantasy VII plays after Krillin's rampage)
-That was...for Yamcha.- said Krillin catching his breath
"nice one Krillin I knew you could do it," said Rainbow Dash
"he took out three Raditz maybe they have a chance," said Rarity
"maybe," said Twilight looking at her notepad
-Congratulations, you've just destroyed the equivalent of three Raditz.- said Vegeta
-That's right! What now, you son of a bi-- said Krillin
-Nappa here is worth five Raditz.- said Vegeta
"that didn' last long," said Applejack
-I-- uh... What?- said Krillin
-And I am worth fifteen Raditz.- said Vegeta
"This is not going to end well," said Fluttershy
-I... Oh...- said Krillin disappointed
-Aw, come on, don't get so down on yourself. At least you've proven that your Raditz is still stronger than our Raditz.- said Nappa
(scene shift to Raditz)
-I...hate...all of you!- said Raditz
"I don't blame him," said Sunset
(scene shifts back to the battlefield)
-So in short, good for you. Oh, by the way, you missed one.- said Vegeta
(one Saibamen pops out from hiding and tries to attack Gohan, only to be grabbed by Piccolo)
"Gohan lookout," said Fluttershy worried
-Yeah, no.- said Piccolo
(punches the Saibamen in its stomach and throws it in the air before blasting it with a mouth blast)
"let's go, Piccolo," said Rainbow Dash
"That was incredible," said Pinkie
"well I guess it was cool," said Fluttershy
-That was incredible, Mr. Piccolo!- said Gohan
-Yeah, way to go!- said Tien
-But, what about-- said Krillin
-Well, you can all learn a thing or two.- said Piccolo
-But I just killed three of them-- said Krillin
-Nobody cares, Krillin!- said Chiaotzu
-Aww...- said Krillin
"they really hate Krillin," said Sunset
-Well, Nappa, looks like it's your turn to teach them a lesson.- said Vegeta
-Yeah, right out of Saiyan University.- said Nappa walking towards the z-warrior
-Hold on, you went to college?- asked Vegeta
"he went to school?" they all said in shock
-Yup.- said Nappa
"then why is he so dumb?" said Twilight
-What the hell could someone like you possibly major in?!- asked Vegeta
-Child Psychology.- said Nappa
"that sound interesting," said Pinkie
-Wow, That sounds really interes—- said Gohan
-With a minor in Pain!- said Nappa dashing towards Tien and severing his left arm in one punch making him scream in absolute pain
"I get it," said Pinkie
they all winced at that scene
-Looks like he's been...disarmed!- said Vegeta
(silence as the wind blows)
-I get it!- said Nappa
"I get it," said Pinkie
-Shut it, Nappa.- said Vegeta
(Tien leaps in the sky)
-Oh, I love this game! Tag!- said Nappa chasing Tien and kicking him towards the ground-No tagbacks.-
"oh no Tien is being beaten up," said Fluttershy
"and that guy thinks is just a game," said Sunset a little angry
-Agh, damn, this guy's strong. Maybe it would be best if I just took Chiaotzu and-- thought Tien noticing that Chiaotzu is gone -Wait, where is he?!-
(Chiaotzu is seen latched onto Nappa's back)
"What is he doing?" asked Rarity
-Vegeta, the Pokémon's on my back.- said Nappa
-Chiaotzu! No!- said Tien
-Aww, I can't get it off, Vegeta! Here, I'll use Rock Smash.- said Nappa smashing his back into a rock, causing Chiaotzu to whimper in pain
"oh no," said Fluttershy
-Chiaotzu, you get down from there this instant!- said Tien
-No! I have to do this, Tenshinhan! For all the people of Earth, our friends, and especially you!- said Chiaotzu telepathically
"is he...?" asked Sunset
"I think he is," said Twilight
-But Chiaotzu...!- said Tien
-Don't worry, you can just wish me back with the Dragon Balls! Now, goodbye, my friend!- said Chiaotzu telepathically
"oh yeah there is no need to worry," said Pinkie
-That won't work, Chiaotzu! We already wished you back once with the Dragon Balls; we can't do it twice!- said Tien
Pinkie widened her eyes at that and looked at the screen and Twilight wrote that in her notepad and quickly looked back at the screen
-Wait, wha--?- said Chiaotzu telepathically before exploding
-N-No! No! Chiaotzu!CHIAOTZUUUU!!!- screamed Tien
they were all sad for Tien and were almost crying while Twilight crossed Chiaotzu's name
-Oh, my God... He blew into more pieces than Yamcha!- said Krillin
"Krillin!" they yelled
-Krillin!- yelled Tien
-What?- said Krillin
"too soon," they all said
-He was my closest friend! I... I loved him.- said Tien
Tien's confession only made them sadder
-As a memorial to Yamcha: gay.- said Krillin
-At least your sacrifice wasn't in vain, my friend.- thought Tien
(Nappa is revealed to be alive, leaving Chiaotzu's sacrifice to be in vain)
"oh what the fu..." said Rainbow Dash
"How is that even possible?" asked Sunset
"is the immortal or something?" asked Rarity
-Aww, dang it, Vegeta. He used Self-Destruct. I hate it when they do that.- said Nappa
-DAMN IT!- said Tien
-Awwww, I think I made him mad, Vegeta. Should I talk to him about it? The first step to working out your problems is healthy communication. And-- said Nappa landing near a grieving Tien
"I hate this guy," said Sunset while the rest of the girls agreed with her
-HUAAAH!- screamed Tien trying to punch Nappa only to hit a boulder instead
-Hey, that was very rude! I was talking to VEGETA!- said Nappa punching Tien, launching him into a boulder
-Should-- shouldn't we help him?- asked Gohan
"you should," said Fluttershy
-Can't you see he has to fight this battle on his own? He's fighting for the honor of his fallen comrade.- said Piccolo
(Nappa is seen beating Tien to a pulp)
-HELP ME, FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, HELP MEEEE!!!- said Tien getting hit with every word
-Like a hero.- said Piccolo
-Mr. Piccolo, help him!- said Gohan
-Oh, fine! Krillin, go!- said Piccolo as the both of them jump into the air to help Tien
"please beat him," thought Fluttershy
-ForPONY!!!!!!!!- said Nappa before being hit by Piccolo-UWAGH! He hit me!- said Nappa before being hit by Krillin-GAH HA! He hit me too!-
"for what?" thought Sunset
"that's right hit right in the face," said Rainbow Dash
(Nappa is seen flying towards Gohan)
-Gohan, hurry up and blast him with all your strength! Before he has time toDOOOOODGE!- said Piccolo
("dodge" echoes traumatically in Gohan's head, causing him to scream and run for cover)
"I can't believe he traumatized Gohan," said Fluttershy angry
-Damn you, Pavlov!- yelled Piccolo
(scene goes static and switches to a news reporter)
-For those of you who don't know who Pavlov is, allow us to take a brief moment to explain. Back in 1904-- said the news reporter
"no one cares," said Rainbow Dash
-Get back to the fight!- said Oolong hitting his hand on the tv
-Annnnd back to the fight.- said the news reporter
(scene goes static and changes back to the fight, with Nappa recovering from Piccolo and Krillin's surprise attack)
-Hey, not gonna lie. Dick move, guys, dick move.- said Nappa
-Piccolo, do you have a plan?- asked Krillin
-That depends; can you get him in a Full Nelson?- asked Piccolo
"that is Goku's ultimate technique no one else can use it," said Pinkie
-Any plans that don't involve killing me?- asked Krillin
-Well, there is the multi-form technique.- said Piccolo
"the what?" said Twilight ready to take notes
-But doesn't that cut our power levels by-- said Krillin
-Plan A or Plan B, Krillin!- said Piccolo
-Plan B! Plan B!- said Krillin
-Kage Bunshin no Jutsu!- said Piccolo and Krillin making three clones of themselves
"oh cloning power," said Twilight writing it down
-Vegeta! I can't..."believe it".- said Nappa receiving an annoyed groan from Vegeta
"now that is a reference worth a Hokage," said Pinkie making the rest of them let out a groan
(the three Piccolos and Krillins attack Nappa, who dominates them with his superior strength)
-Hrgh, he's dodging every hit! We can't lay a finger on him! What kind of incredible mental discipline has this guy gone through?- thought Piccolo
-Patty cake, patty cake, baker's MAN!- said Nappa punching a Krillin clone-Bake me a cake as fast as you CAN!- said Nappa punching a Piccolo clone and eventually launching all three clones towards the ground
"really pattycake?" said Applejack
"It is really fun to do," said Pinkie
(Krillin slams onto the ground, followed by his two clones, causing him to groan in pain)
Krillin Owned Count: 5-7
(Piccolo also hits the ground, followed by his doubles, which knocks him down)
-Good effort, but I'm the Patty Cake champion.- said Nappa
-What?- said Piccolo
-But, at least you didn't uselessly self-destruct like that Pokémon.- said Nappa
Sunset let out an angry groan at that
-You stupid...ugly...son of a bitch.- said Tien getting up from the beatdown and charging a blast-His name...wasCHIAOTZU! KIKŌHŌ!- screamed Tien firing a spirit tri-beam at Nappa
-Yeah, that Chiaotzu--OH, MY GOOOOOD!- said Nappa getting hit directly by Tien's attack
"Yeah that's right Tien," said Rainbow Dash
-Right here... Right behind you, Chiaotzu.- thought Tien falling on the ground, dying from using up all his energy
"Tien no," said Rainbow Dash
"at least he managed to defeat that monster," said Sunset while Twilight crossed off Tien's name
(Nappa again survives the attack, this time, losing some of his armor)
"ok now that is just bs," said Rainbow Dash
"that guy just doesn't die," said Applejack
-Aha, pointless.- said Nappa
-We're gonna die, aren't we.- said Krillin completely terrified
-Yep!- said Nappa before charging towards them but suddenly he stops in midair and looks at Vegeta
-Vegeta!- said Nappa
-What?- asked Vegeta annoyed
-I can fly...!- said Nappa
"I don't even..." said Rarity
-Yes, Nappa, yes you can.- said Vegeta after stammering for a little bit
-You know, you're gonna be in a lot of trouble once Goku gets here!- said Krillin
"yeah he is going to kick your sorry butt," said Rainbow Dash
-Who?- asked Vegeta
-Goku! He's stronger than all of us combined!- said Krillin
-Well then, I guess we better kill you before he gets here.- said Vegeta
"that I not how it goes," said Pinkie
-W-Wait, I mean...- said Krillin
-But Vegeta, I wanna meet the strong guy!- said Nappa
-Nappa just kill them first and-- said Vegeta
-But I want him to see us kill them!- said Nappa
-Oh, God, there's no arguing with you. Fine, I'll give you three hours tops. After that, I'm killing all of you.- said Vegeta
"Please come quickly Goku," said Fluttershy
-Yay! And now we wait.- said Nappa
(Thirty seconds later...)
-Is he here yet?- said Nappa
"oh please no I thought this was over," said Rarity
-No.- said Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin
-Is he here yet?- said Nappa
-No...!- said Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin
-Is he here yet?- said Nappa
-NO!- said Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin
-Is he here yet?- said Nappa
-NOO!!- said Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin
(long pause)
-...Is he here ye--?- said Nappa
-NOO!!!- said Vegeta, Piccolo, Gohan, Krillin
-Goddammit, Nappa, just go do something! Go have fun-- I don't care how.- said Vegeta
-Oh boy! This is gonna be my best...day...ever.- said Nappa
(scene shifts to Nappa destroying both naval and air forces, laughing while doing so, while Peewee's Pocket Circus plays in the background)
"so many people," said Fluttershy in shock
(scene shifts back to the battlefield with the Z-Fighters waiting for Goku until Vegeta's scouter beeps)
-Well, time's up-- time to die.- said Vegeta removing his scouter and throwing it at the ground
"Goku didn't get there in time," said Sunset in shock
-So, where's your friend-- said Piccolo
-I'm back!- said Nappa elbowing Piccolo in the head
[ENDING SEQUENCE]
[STINGER]
-Nappa, where did your armor go?- asked Vegeta
-I had a hell of a day, Vegeta. I sank their battleship...and their whales.- said Nappa
(scene shifts to the remains of a navy ship floating in a bloody ocean, presumably the blood of the whales Nappa indirectly murdered)
"How could he, the whales had nothing to do with this," said Fluttershy incomplete horror
-Nooo...- yelled Aquaman
"so ready for the next episode," said Pinkie trying to bring up the mood but it didn't work so she just hit the play button for the next episode.