"Okay," Regina sighs heavily as she steps into the living room where Ivy is waiting for her, waiting for the last of the guests to leave. "That was bad. I am so sorry, that was...well, I am so embarrassed. It's just that Emma makes me so crazy, she knows exactly how to get under my skin and push at all my buttons," she exasperates, still as aggravated as ever.
Ivy slowly stands, her eyes a little wet, drowning in sorrow. "Regina, if I fought with any of my ex's the way that you fight with Emma, maybe I would be married by now." Regina blinks, stunned as this woman takes her hand and smiles so softly. "Just one look at you two and I see the passion-"
"That's irritation," she growls, inspiring a sad little chuckle to escape Ivy's mouth.
"Maybe, but you don't feel that kind of desire, that passion, that irritation for me. You don't look at me the way you look at her. I don't have your heart, she does."
"I really do like you, Ivy. You are the perfect girlfriend. The girl I have spent my entire life searching for," she quietly reveals.
Ivy steps closer, cupping her cheek and stroking her cheekbone. "Until you stumbled upon the girl that sparked a fire in your soul. And nobody can hold a candle to her."
"I'm so sorry," she swears, her eyes pleading with this woman not to hate her. "I wanted us to work out."
"I know, me too," Ivy whispers, pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "Sometimes the world has different plans, but I do wish you all the luck."
"You too, Ivy. I hope you find someone who deserves you."
"She's out there, she's just figuring out that she's with the wrong person, too."
Regina offers a crooked smile and then she watches as Ivy slips out the door and out of her life. For good this time. And yes, her heart twists, knowing that woman is special, but the pain isn't nearly as excruciating as when she watched Emma walk out on her.
"Mama!"
Regina spins around, a depressing frown set into place as she peers down at Lennox in her pack and play. "I'm sorry baby, Emma isn't here," she coos, gently lifting Lennox up and placing her against her chest. She presses a soft kiss to Lennox's forehead, but this time she refuses to cry. "It's just you and me, but I know we will be just fine," she vows before carrying Lennox upstairs to start their bedtime routine.
She moves quickly this evening, feeling the weight of exhaustion slowly poisoning her from within, knowing she needs rest. She gives Lennox a quick shower, not wanting to waste too much time playing in the bathtub and then has the baby in her pajamas in record time.
She settles Lennox down on her queen size bed with her favorite bedtime story and begins to read. Lennox is enthusiastic tonight, slamming her hands down on pictures and giggling along as Regina changes her voice for each character. When Regina is near the end of the story, Lennox crawls into her lap.
"Momma," she sleepily says, snuggling in close against Regina's chest.
Regina freezes. Her eyes wandering around the room as she tries to comprehend what she just heard or if maybe she misunderstood, however, the rest of her body is paralyzed.
"Lennox, what did you say?" She softly whispers.
"Momma!" Lennox happily replies, perking up a bit, knowing she will receive praise for speaking.
"Oh no, no, sweetie, I'm Auntie Regina. Gi-na," she slowly emphasizes, but then Lennox places her chubby little hands upon Regina's face and smiles with her entire face.
"Momma."
And Regina stops for a moment, she really takes a moment to assess the situation. Yes, Kathryn is Lennox's mother and when she is old enough to comprehend, Regina will make sure her goddaughter knows who gave birth to her. However, Lennox will never remember Kathryn and in Lennox's eyes, Regina is the one who will raise her and be her mother for the rest of her life.
So, why is she pushing the whole Auntie thing?
She is Lennox's mom now. She spends every day taking care of her and loving her as if she is her own. She has full custody of her, she is officially Lennox's parent and she will spend the rest of her life guiding Lennox and looking out for her. So, why shouldn't she have that title?
"Momma!"
Regina gently takes Lennox's hand into her own and softly kisses her little fingers. "Yes, baby girl, I'm your momma," she whispers, her eyes filling with tears of joy from the acknowledgment. "And I love you with all my heart."
Her best friend gave her something she had always dreamed of, motherhood.
A few happy tears slide down her cheeks as she lifts Lennox into her lap and holds her close, holds her baby close. Tonight, she will allow Lennox to sleep in her bed, cuddled up close to her.
Tonight is a special night.
XXXX
"How about, please?" Regina asks, watching as Lennox dives her spoon into her oatmeal.
"Peas?" Lennox softly repeats, producing a grin across Regina's face that cannot possibly stretch any further.
"Good job, sweetie! Nice talking," Regina proudly praises, running her fingers through Lennox's hair.
The moment is interrupted of course by a firm knock at their door. Lennox pops her head right up, her gaze locking onto the front door, just like Regina.
"Ut-oh."
Regina laughs, shaking her head in amusement. "Do you assume it's someone I don't like?" She muses, reaching into the high-chair and removing Lennox. "I wonder who is at the door. Can you say, who is it?" She babbles while her daughter simply giggles in return.
She quickly unlocks the door and swings it open to discover the last person she needs barging into her life right now.
"Ms. Kelly."
"Miss Mills."
She tries not to sigh heavily in this woman's face as she steps back and gestures for her to enter. "Please, come on in."
"Much more inviting than your regular doorman," Zelena sasses, waltzing right into their home as if she owns the place. "Speaking of, where is Miss Swan?"
"Oh, well, actually," Regina stammers, softly closing the door behind the woman. "She received a great job offer in Phoenix, wonderful raise and promotion."
"I see," Ms. Kelly says, but her face unexpectedly falls from the new tidbit of information. "And where does that leave her relationship with Lennox?"
"Oh, she's been FaceTiming with her every day and she has made arrangements to come back once a month to visit. She was actually just in for Thanksgiving," she cheerfully divulges, praying that her voice doesn't sound too perky to mask the heartache that is still tormenting her.
"So, you two are trying the whole long distance thing?" The woman investigates, yet, she doesn't sound like their case worker anymore, but more like a concerned friend.
"No," she confesses, subconsciously holding Lennox closer. "We decided it would be best if we just co-parent. Less complicated," she vaguely states, waving off the subject of conversation before she breaks down crying all over again.
"I see."
"It's easier this way. No huge calendars dictating our lives. No fighting over what's best for Lennox. It's simpler," she defends, yet Zelena is still observing her closely and Regina's just going to pretend that she doesn't see the sympathy in those piercing blue eyes.
"Alright, shall we begin?" Zelena asks.
Regina nods, leading the way into the kitchen where she was having breakfast with Lennox. She knows her little one is still hungry, so she sets her down in the high-chair and smiles when Lennox dives right back in.
"So, this is our last meeting, correct?" Regina verifies, settling down in the chair directly across from Zelena at the kitchen table.
"Yes, this is all standard protocol, but I have to be here today and follow up, even though I have no doubt in my mind that you are the best option for Lennox."
"Thank you," she whispers, feeling that overwhelming sense of pride bloom in her chest. "Even if I'm alone?" She skeptically inquires, needing a little bit more proof before she can internally do a happy dance.
"Yes, of course. There are plenty of single mothers out there. That should not take away from how much you care for this child and help guide her. Look at the little bean, happily eating a well-balanced meal, all on her own I might add," Zelena compliments and it's like a choir singing its praise to Regina's ears.
A goofy grin slides into place and she can't help but feel so proud in this moment. And then comes a flicker of a memory, when she was struggling to get Lennox to eat anything and if Emma hadn't been there to help coax the little one, she is sure Lennox would have starved.
"Did I say something wrong?" Ms. Kelly questions when she sees the far off look in Regina's eyes accompanied by a pitiful pout.
"Oh no, I'm sorry," Regina shakes her head, trying to rid her mind of the first time Lennox ate her food and she leaped into Emma's arms because she was over the moon. "I-well, I just feel that I need to share some of the credit with Emma."
"Alright, either way I won't hold it against you."
"I know, I-Emma helped so much. I mean, we shared the responsibilities. It was never like Lennox was mine and I was doing all the work and Emma was just around to babysit or anything. Lennox was ours."
"Okay, I'm not really sure why you feel compelled to elaborate," Zelena states, squirming in her seat just a little. "I see how happy Lennox is and I know with or without Miss Swan, you are an excellent caregiver."
"Thank you," she mumbles, persuading Zelena to nod curtly while she decides what her next question regarding the child should be. "It's just-Emma kept me calm, she talked me down a lot in those moments when Lennox wouldn't stop crying. I am always so nervous and overthinking, but Emma always kept her cool," she proceeds to ramble, much to her own mortification.
Zelena narrows her eyes, her lips pursing as she closes Lennox's file and leans into the table. "Are you trying to sabotage this last meeting?"
"Oh no, no, I'm sorry, I-"
"Have Emma Swan on your brain?" The woman deadpans, generating a deep blush to paint Regina's cheeks. "I am no love expert, but I'm also not blind. It's obvious you aren't handling your breakup with Miss Swan quite as well as you thought."
"I'm sorry, this is very inappropriate. We should be focusing on Lennox," she apologizes, her cheeks morphing into a deeper hue of embarrassment.
"We should, but there really isn't anything of importance that we need to discuss. You own a very clean home, Lennox is healthy, properly fed and bathed every time I come. She has learned to walk and talk since I have started coming. She's obviously not neglected. You are a successful woman, who owns her own business. I mean you're a bloody baker for God's sake, you scream homemaker. Although, you did slap a brownie out of my hand, so obviously you are not great with sharing." Regina chuckles at this, while the feisty redhead flashes a wicked little grin. "My job here is done. However, I do suggest tracking down Miss Swan and revealing your true feelings before it's too late."
"She's most likely at the airport already," she says reflexively without truly thinking.
"Well, then I suggest you get a move on and go get your girl."
"Absolutely not. This isn't some ridiculous rom-com movie where I throw away hundreds of dollars on a plane ticket that I will never use and goes completely to waste, just to get me to the gate to find out the plane has already left. Not to mention security, trying to get through O'hare Airport and through security takes at least two hours. It's really quite foolish and not at all believable," she scoffs, moving quickly to clear the table as a distraction, tossing most of her breakfast away because she has suddenly lost her appetite.
"You don't sound bitter at all," Zelena quips under her breath, gathering her papers and standing from the table.
"Not bitter, just...realistic," she corrects, nodding firmly to persuade herself into believing the lies she tells.
"Alright, well, we are all finished here."
"Okay, I will walk you out," she politely offers, swooping up Lennox into her arms again and heading straight to the door, ready to move forward in her life and put all of this in the past. "Thanks for everything."
"You are more than welcome and I wish you and Lennox so much happiness," the case worker kindly says, holding a genuine smile.
"Thank you," she replies, yanking the door open, and instantly jumping back when she discovers blonde bouncing curls and a red leather jacket decorating the front porch. Emma's hand is paralyzed mid-air, like she was just about to knock.
"Hi," Emma sheepishly says, shrugging her shoulders and offering the most adorably crooked grin.
"Miss Swan, you missed the meeting," Zelena sasses, provoking green eyes to double in size. "Luckily, Regina is responsible and her manners are far more appealing than yours," she continues, breezing right passed Regina and Emma. "Good luck you two," she smugly adds on before she disappears in her green car and peels out of there.
"Emma," Regina gasps, nervously hiking Lennox higher on her hip. "What are you doing here?"
"I'm an idiot."
"Finally, something we can agree on," Regina retorts dryly, but then Emma is smirking at her and it forces her stomach to do a somersault and she is suddenly grinning back at the blonde.
"Can this idiot come inside?"
"Mommy!" Lennox squeals, reaching for Emma, causing the woman to blink in surprise.
"Did she-"
"She calls me momma," Regina softly admits, pressing a kiss to Lennox's temple. "It seems she is certain that we are her mommies."
Emma rushes forward, stealing Lennox away and kicking the door closed behind her. "You crazy little thing," she laughs, kissing Lennox's forehead. "So, are you correcting her, or what?" She inquires, slightly breathless from the glee coursing through her body and stealing her breath away from being called, mommy.
"I don't really see the point any longer. We are raising her, she doesn't know anyone else and for the rest of her life we will be her mothers, correct?"
Emma slowly peels her eyes away from Lennox to find the warmest set of honest brown eyes blinking back at her. She swallows, holding Lennox just a tad closer.
"Regina, we need to talk about yesterday."
"I couldn't agree more," she concedes before pivoting and leading the way upstairs. "Lennox can play in her room while we speak," she suggests, but Emma is already following in her shadow.
When they enter the bedroom, Emma sets Lennox down on the floor, who happily runs to her toy box to pick out what she wants.
"So," Emma awkwardly announces, slapping her hands against her thighs.
But then Lennox is back with a doll and yanking on Emma's hand to persuade her into sitting down. She laughs at the little pout peering up at her and easily caves. She settles down on the ground, folding her legs like a pretzel and accepting the doll Lennox offers. Regina smiles at the two green-eyed beauties and she finds herself sitting directly across from Emma. It isn't long before Lennox hands her a stuffed puppy.
"So," Regina repeats, nervously holding the stuffed animal close. "I thought you would be halfway to Arizona by now."
"Yeah, me too," Emma mutters under her breath and shrugs anxiously again. She inhales sharply and then finally lifts her gaze to meet Regina's. "Regina, I wanted to start off by saying, I'm so sorry. Yesterday was bad. That...well, I guess that was one month of bottling up our true feelings and exploding."
"I agree and I would like to apologize too for things that I said. I was angry, hurt and caught up in the moment."
"Yeah, I know. But Regina, everything I said, I meant," she confesses, her voice wavering from the admission as her eyes become misty. "I am so in love with you and just because we fought like cats and dogs when we were first met, doesn't mean that I didn't learn everything about you over time and fall in love with the person I know now."
"Emma-"
"No, please let me finish," Emma pleads, scooting across the plush carpet until her knees are kissing Regina's. "August and Kathryn saw something in us that we couldn't see because we were both too damn stubborn. But with Lennox, we were able to set aside our differences and put her first. We love her, and our love for her fused together and showed us how we can love each other. We make sense, not just you and me, but the three of us," Emma states with conviction as Lennox crawls into her lap. "We are a family and we are only whole when we are all together."
"Why did you leave?" Regina blurts out, her mind lost in the moment.
"Because I was scared and ever since I was little, if I was scared of a home, I ran. But I'm done running, I swear," she pleads, her green eyes shimmering from the thick wetness clinging to her eyes.
"You told me you would never leave us and you did. You swore you just needed time and space. Why didn't you come home after our fight in the street?" She softly whispers, trying to keep the break out of her voice from the sob swelling in the back of her throat.
"I thought you were kicking me out. When you told me to take the job, I thought it was an easy way for you to kick me to the curb, an easy out to end things between us. So, I ran."
"I waited for you, I waited all night for you to come home," she croaks out, choking on her own words as her vision blurs.
"I'm so sorry, Regina." Emma rushes forward, practically squishing Lennox between them as she cups the back of Regina's neck and connects their foreheads. "I was so stupid. That promotion means nothing to me. You and Lennox were the first things on my mind when the job was offered to me. And it scared me so much that something I worked my entire career for, wasn't important anymore. I wanted to decline the offer, but I thought I would regret it or maybe even resent you after awhile, but my priorities in life changed. You and Lennox are my number one and nothing could ever come before you guys again. You two are my world and nothing else compares," she confesses, sniffling through her speech as a few tears fall between them.
And Regina can't suppress her emotions any longer. She chuckles, because if she doesn't laugh through the moment she will end up ugly-crying all over Emma. She sniffles, but a few of her own tears are dribbling down her cheeks.
"Regina?"
"Yes?"
"Can I please come home?" Emma implores, her voice wet and wobbly from all her crying.
"Yes," she breathes out a sigh of relief, brushing her lips against Emma's in the process, motivating Lennox to crawl out from their laps and grant them a private moment. "This will always be your home," she whispers into the gentle kiss. "This will always be the place you can run to, not from."
Emma grins from ear to ear, tugging Regina into her lap before she delicately captures those plump lips once again. Regina drapes her arms over her shoulders while Emma's hands possessively latch onto her bottom.
"I love you," Emma murmurs.
"I love you too, Emma," she confesses, burying her fingers into a mess of golden curls.
Emma slowly breaks the kiss and rests her forehead against Regina's chest. "I guess you need to break things off with Ivy and I'm going to put my two weeks notice in and then I will come home again, okay? And we can have a second chance at this?"
"Ivy and I ended things last night," Regina murmurs, gently massaging Emma's scalp as the blonde beams back at her. "And as for the second chance?" Regina muses, yanking on a fistful of hair to lock eyes with the woman she is madly in love with. "I believe this will be our third attempt together."
"No," Emma confidently rebuttals. "We had our blind date and that didn't really work out, but then we got a second crack at a date and that went surprisingly well. We decided to give us a try and I kind of screwed things up, so now we are having a second chance at being a couple again."
"You sure know how to twist things, don't you?" Regina deadpans with an unamused expression, but Emma just grins wildly at her.
"Momma," Lennox says, slithering her way into Regina's lap.
"I had a feeling she wasn't calling me, Emma, she was trying to say, momma, all this time."
"I suppose you are right," Regina concludes, holding Lennox close in her lap. "And I suppose we are Lennox's second chance at a family."
"We definitely won't screw it up this time," Emma vows.
"To second chances," Regina whispers, pressing a kiss to the top of Lennox's head while Emma holds them especially close.