Chapter Ten: Seeing Life On Top of the World
Chris: [narrating] Last time on Total Drama Reloaded, our six remaining competitors faced off in a race against an obstacle course that really tested their gumption, some more successfully than others. They raced through rings of fires, crossed over crocodiles, made their way through the perilous piranhas, and finally took a tumble while crossing the rope bridge to the finish line. On a different note, Jo being the last member of Team Punisher kinda put her in a bit of a hot spot, but she managed to form herself an alliance with Team Pulverizer's Rarity, as well as getting more than she bargained for with the fashionista being able to meet at her level. Now that's classy. Additionally, Emerald's still as nasty as ever as she made a list detailing the remainder of the competition left in the game, and what do you know, she managed to get rid of one of 'em...in the form of Balto, who was the last person to make it to the finish line...okay, so Emerald was technically the only one to cross the line while everyone...kinda fell into the trees below, but Balto was the furthest from the line where he landed, so I ruled him to walk the Dock of Shame, which he did like a good loser would. But I guess you could say he got a fair farewell with his alliance mates Steele and Rufus sending him off, don't ya' just love the sappiness in this? [chuckles] [on-screen] We're down to the final five, who will be the next one to lose their chance at a million big ones, and who will stay to fight another day? Find out right here, right now on Total...Drama...Reloaded!
[cue theme song, the episode continues]
[scene shows Jo, Rarity, Rufus, and Steele sitting by the campfire from the previous episode, each of them having different expressions on their face from contemplation, to annoyance, to anxiety, to tired]
Rarity: [sighs] Another chance at the spa hotel lost…[turns to Steele]...um...I'm sorry for what happened with Balto...it was such a shame what happened to him...he was a nice one, really…
Steele: [his eyes shift over to the fashionista with a half-lidded gaze] Yeah...he was...thanks, I guess…
Rarity: Um, yeah...sure…I apologize if I'm being rather skittish with my speech, it's just been a long day…
Steele: Hmph, tell me about it…
Rufus: So...what do we do now…?
Jo: Ain't it obvious, we gotta find a way to get Emerald off this show if that'll ever happen at this rate…
Rarity: Hmm...I agree, I guess it's also just so surreal to see her having so much...control as of late, back when we were on teams, she wasn't really all...that, perhaps rather authoritarian, but not to...this extent...now it seems she's an unstoppable force that can't be contained…
Steele: What I wouldn't give to show that bitch what for, especially for whacking me in the muzzle and then kicking me in the chest…
Rufus: Oh...you're not still...hurt, are you…?
Steele: Heh, I've been through some of the worst blizzards in history and came back alive, it's gonna take a lot more to take down this.
Jo: Ya' know, I've heard all about your record in being one of the top sled dogs, you got some real credit to your name in being able to carry the entire team on your back. Heh, just like I've been doing for the majority of my teams.
Steele: Yeah, I've heard about the way you carried the maggots back when the island had all that toxic waste, you weren't takin' s**t from no one.
Jo: Well, someone had to make sure those teammates of mine were kept in order, I mean, could you imagine any of them leading the team?
Steele: Heh, not a chance, kinda like how there was no one else on my team that could lead and carry them to victory like yours truly.
Jo: Heh, the way you were carrying their dragging behinds like they were light as feathers is some real gumption, and yet they thought you were disposable...pfft, they wouldn't know talent if they saw it.
Steele: Yeah...those f**kin' people…I can't really hold it against Balto for his little...stunt as he wasn't trying to beat me, just getting a little girl's hat...but those old bastards decided to snark about me right in my face like I couldn't understand them and s**t…
Jo: Ugh, you're tellin' me, I've had my fair share of dealing with bulls**t, the kind that really gets the blood boiling. I practically carried my whole team twice on my first run, and who ends up in the finale? A meathead who couldn't tell I was a girl for the majority of the competition and a bubble boy who I, and several others, carried to the finals by being all weak and spineless, Hell, I deserved that finale, who cares if I wasn't the nicest competitor, I didn't get to where I was by being all fru-fru girly and s**t, I'm gonna kick ass to get to the top if I have to.
Steele: Sounds like someone's speakin' my language, where have you been all my life?
Jo: Heh, same thing could be said about you...ya' know, regardless of all the comments I've made of you back when we were on opposite teams, I gotta hand it to you, you're not as bad as I thought you were, especially since it's a breath of fresh air to see someone who knows how to speak my lingo.
Steele: Yeah...you're right there, and I'll give ya' this, you really know to kick ass on the battlefield and never let anyone talk s**t to you. I respect that…[extends his hand out to shake]...truce...at least for now?
Jo: [extends her hand out] Truce...for now.
[the malamute and the human girl link their hands together to shake]
[static buzzing]
Jo: Heh, guess I had that Steele pegged all wrong. Nice to know that there's someone who understands the meaning of competition, it's all eyes on the prize, even if you don't happen to be all sunshine and rainbows. After all, it's called survival of the fittest for a reason, and I respect that. Ya' know, I wouldn't mind adding him to my options to go against in the final two if Rarity becomes unavailable. Either way, I'm not complainin'.
[static buzzing]
Steele: Does it suck that Balto's gone? You can bet that it does, but after that little chat with Jo, I guess you could say I needed someone who really understands what it takes to be the best, and I'd say we're not that different from each other in that regard. Girl's got grit, I've got grit. And that grit's gonna get me the gold, guaranteed.
[static buzzing]
Rarity: Well, look at you two, acting as if you were old friends.
Jo: You're not gonna pull that "friendship lesson" crap on us, are you?
Rarity: Oh, darling, I'm not just a caricature, you know, I was just making an observation is all. Still, it is nice to see a little friendly atmosphere amidst all this chaos. Especially since it's back to the old grind tomorrow…
Rufus: Yeah...makes me miss Reggie all the more…
Steele: Ya' know, I've got a question for you and him.
Rufus: Um, alright...what is it…?
Steele: Are you two...you know…?
Rufus: Hmm...we've experimented, but never gone farther than that.
Steele: Ah, I see...say, you don't suppose he'd mind joining us if ya' know what I mean?
Rufus: [blushes in surprise at this]
[scene cuts to the interior of the spa hotel where Emerald is seen in the library at the desk]
Emerald: Let's see here…[looks down at her chart with the names of the contestants still remaining in the competition]...Steele was a former team member, so that's already a mark against him…[pounds the pencil on the aforementioned malamute's name]...but Jo is open as the only member of the opposite team left standing...then, there's that Rarity, in spite of being noticeably weaker than the former two in terms of strength, she has the advantage of that horn of hers...meaning she'll go good for a third place boot...and then there's you…[points the pencil at Rufus' name]...seeing as you've got practically no physical strength in comparison to the others, I suppose I can spare you for the finals...where I will crush you in swift victory…[chuckles haughtily]...
[static buzzing]
Emerald: Unlike the rest of those weaklings, I don't need an ally. I can function perfectly on my own as I have the tactical advantage of mapping out my competition. Who needs to worry about who you can trust when the best person to trust is yourself. No need to worry about your position in other people's hands when you can turn the tables against them, and I'm going to keep it that way.
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to outside of the spa hotel as it shifts over to the cabins where the two males and two females are seen going inside their respective quarters. It then cuts to Rufus and Steele getting into their respective places on the same bunk bed]
Rufus: [sighs] Well, it may not be luxury bedding, but anything is better than having to spend another night with Emerald.
Steele: Hmm, I can imagine so. Heh, bet you wish you had me right by your side so that you could have had some proper company.
Rufus: Hehehe, well, you're not wrong there. Having you and Balto in the hotel would have made the experience of staying another night all the more worth it. But...seeing as Balto's gone and Emerald's in the hotel on her own...who knows what she's doing in there?
Steele: I reckon something along the lines of plotting our demise.
Rufus: ...Yeah, that sounds about it…just glad that at least I'm not under her angry gaze at the present time. It's like she was trying to set me alight with her eyes…[shudders]
Steele: Well, she continues pulling that s**t, she'll have me to answer to, mark my words.
Rufus: Ooooh...you don't have to put yourself in danger like that…
Steele: I ain't scared of that bitch. I can take anything she has to throw at me. And I mean anything.
Rufus: Ooooh...well, I appreciate your concern…
Steele: Hmm, no problem, after all, someone's gotta protect that cute lil tail a yours.
Rufus: [blushes profusely at this] Oooooh, stop…
[scene cuts to morning as the sun is only just peering over the horizon. It then cuts to the interior of the females' side of the cabins as Rarity is seen sleeping peacefully in her bed...that is until Jo hops down from the top bunk]
Rarity: [opens her eyes halfway] Wha…[yawns]...Jo...what are you doing…?
Jo: [while doing push-ups] Figured that old man Mclean was gonna give another rude wakeup, so I decided to beat him to the punch in gettin' a little early morning exercise.
Rarity: Uh-huh...well, seeing as I'm awake as well, I might as well get ready for the day…[gets up from her bed and heads over to the mirror to brush her mane] You know, I guess I should thank you for the unexpected wakeup call. I've had just about enough of Chris waking us up with-
[at the moment, a loud screeeeeech sounds through the camp as the loudspeaker comes to life, the sound causing both Rufus and Steele to abruptly wake up wide-eyed as they then groan with the former covering his head with a pillow while the latter covers himself with the blanket]
Loudspeaker: Wakey-wakey, final five! Today's challenge isn't gonna torture itself! [chuckles] Time to meet outside your cabins to see just what fun activities we've got planned for you today, something I know you'll enjoy!
Steele: [muffled from underneath the pillow] UGH, f**k you…[delves into incoherent mumbling]
Rufus: [groans as he removes the blanket from his face] I hate that man...so much…
Steele: [muffled] You and me both…
[scene cuts to the contestants standing outside of their respective quarters]
Jo: [looks at Rufus and Steele still trying to wake themselves up] Huh, looks like someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning.
Steele: [yawns] What I wouldn't give to be back in said bed…
Rufus: [groans as he stretches] I concur…
Emerald: Hmph, figures that you two would be so ill-prepared at this time of day.
Steele: [his eyes shift coldly at Emerald] What's that supposed to mean, genius?
Emerald: Well, it's really no surprise that the likes of you and Foxy over there would still be as organized as a pair of amethysts after fighting each other. Tsk-tsk, really, unlike me, I'm always organized at any time.
Steele: Sure, sure, now would you happen to be organized in the case of, oh, I don't know, losing?
Emerald: That's ironic coming from you. [pokes at his nose pointedly] If I'm not mistaken, you're not one to take defeat lightly, something about getting rather...defensive.
Steele: [his eye twitches] Is that so...sounds rich coming from the green spazz who can't catch a few "impure gems".
Emerald: THAT'S UNDER THE INCOMPETENCE OF MY STAFF!
Steele: Mmm-hmm, sure.
Rarity: [looks away exasperated] Uuuuugh…
[static buzzing]
Rarity: I honestly just cannot deal with noise like this so early in the morning, and there they go. [puts a hand on her forehead] What I wouldn't give for a massage from that spa hotel right about now.
[static buzzing]
[Chris approaches the contestants amidst Steele and Emerald continuing to squabble. While they're distracted, he pulls out an air horn and presses down on it, causing the contestants to hold their ears as they try to regain their senses]
Chris: Thank you, now that I have your full and undivided attention, it's time for you to conquer today's challenge. In Steele and Emerald's case, it might as well be seeing who can conquer one another. [chuckles as the two aforementioned contestants glare at each other] Anyways, follow me!
[scene cuts to the contestants, Chris, and Chef standing below a familiar looking rockface that spans high into the sky]
Chris: Today, you'll be climbing up the familiar site of Mount Looming Tragedy to see which of you's got the strength of a mountain man.
Jo: Heh, no sweat, I climbed that rock several years back with barely a scratch, I can handle a little rerun of what was supposed to be my team's victory.
Chris: And if I recall, your team didn't make it all the way to the top first, only you. [chuckles as the jockette scowls at him] Anyways, today's challenge may look like a retread of the one done back in Revenge and X-Treme, but this time, I decided to add a few surprises to make things a little more interesting.
Steele: Let me guess, the person who arrives last is the one getting eliminated, yeah, I think we get it at this point.
Chris: I see you got a sharp eye, Steele, which is why I figured you'd say that. So, instead of the last person completing the challenge being the one to automatically get the boot, tonight's elimination ceremony will be someone getting voted off. Happy?
[the contestants all glance at each other, all with uncertain expressions on their faces]
Chris: Heh, so surprised, they're all speechless. [chuckles with Chef] Also, to make things more difficult for you and more funny to me, you'll all be carrying heavy packs up the mountain, and I expect you all to keep them for the entire challenge. Anyone who removes their pack is instantly disqualified, no ifs or buts about it.
[the contestants are each handed a pack by Chef, each of them grunting as the weight of their luggage is already prevalent]
Rufus: Ugh, what's in these things?! Bowling balls?
Rarity: Ooooooh, I'm going to give myself a hunchback carrying this!
Chris: Well, it's either hunchback or lose out on a million big ones. Your choice.
Rarity: [scowls disdainfully at the host] Mmmmmm…
[static buzzing]
Rarity: You know what? I've made it to the final five and I am not about to squander my progress! One way or another, I'm getting to the top of that mountain!
[static buzzing]
Jo: If I can make it over a dumb piece of rock once, I can do it again. A little extra weight on my back is nothing, the key is to stuff any kind of weakness compiling inside of you and crushing it into dust.
[static buzzing]
Chris: Alright then, first player to reach the top wins invincibility and a night at the spa hotel, the rest of you will be on the chopping block and pray that it's not your sorry butt on the Boat of Losers tonight. Ready...set...GO! [blows the air horn]
[the contestants then start to try and climb up the mountain with Jo taking an early lead, followed by Steele with Emerald behind him, while Rarity and Rufus struggle at the back]
Rufus: [panting] Haaaa...haaaaaa...okay...just gotta...get to...this bit…[stops on a ledge as the camera pans out to reveal that he's barely several feet from the ground]
Jo: [looks down briefly at the others] Hehe, what'd I tell ya'? This challenge is in the-[as she grabs onto another ledge, she's instantly shocked by an electric wire]-GEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! [she then dangles by one hand as she tries to regain her senses] Whasaaa…?
[scene cuts to Chris watching from above]
Chris: Hehehe, didn't I say there'd be surprises? [chuckles heartily]
Emerald: [notices that Jo has stopped in her tracks and sees the opportunity to overtake Steele] Out of my way, mutt! This race is mine! [shoves at the malamute as he grunts]
Steele: Aaaah, no ya' don't! [grabs onto her right foot, causing the green gem to squirm]
Emerald: AGH! Let go of me, earthling! [tries to kick at Steele, but can't make a direct hit at the risk of coming loose herself]
Steele: Gah! No way in hell!
Emerald: GRRRRRRRR…[finally manages to give a decent enough kick to cause the malamute to slightly slip down the mountain] Ah, much better.
Steele: [manages to grab onto a ledge before he falls too far] GUF!
Jo: [as she blows at her hand before scowling up at the top] That's it, McLean, you're just begging for an ass kicking! [resumes to furiously climb up the mountain just as Emerald begins to close in on her]
Emerald: DOOOOOOOOOH, BLAST IT!
[scene cuts back up to Chris]
Chris: Well, looks like Jo and Emerald are really battling it out down there, but which of the mighty titans will be the first to arrive at the top and which of them will fall from grace? Find out when we return on Total...Drama...Reloaded!
[scene cuts to black, the episode continues]
[scene shows Steele trying to make his way back up as he grabs onto a ledge]
Steele: Haaaaa...damn stupid Emerald...how the hell does she keep screwing me like that? [his ears suddenly perk up to the sound of feminine panting and looks down] Well, fancy meeting you here.
Rarity: [panting] This...is so...undignified…
Steele: Hmph, ya' tellin' me…[looks down further to see Rufus only just barely behind Rarity, looking thoroughly exhausted]
[static buzzing]
Rufus: Okay, so maybe I'm not the fastest at climbing mountains, but can you blame me? I felt like I was carrying an elephant on my back!
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts back to Jo and Emerald only just neck and neck with each other]
Emerald: Give it up, human! There is no chance of you beating me to the top!
Jo: Says the little green gremlin who can't outmatch this! [begins to climb faster up the mountain, leaving Emerald with a shocked expression on her face]
Emerald: What?! GRRRRRRRR! [begins to climb faster to try and catch up with Jo when just a few inches below her, an explosion shoots out from the mountain, causing to spring up slightly and dangle on her current ledge] YIP!
Jo: [stops briefly and looks down] WHOA! Dynamite?!
[scene cuts to Chris]
Chris: I had some leftover explosives from the mines, so I figured I use them to my advantage.
Emerald: ARE YOU INSANE, THAT COULD HAVE BLOWN ME TO KINGDOM KOM! [growls as she continues to furiously make her journey up the mountain]
[static buzzing]
Emerald: That disgusting excuse of human material is going to regret trying to destroy me!
Loudspeaker: [off-screen] I sincerely doubt it, Emmy. [chuckles as Emerald scowls darkly]
Emerald: How dare you, it's Emerald, not Emmy! EMERALD! [punches the confessional wall which causes a hole]
[static buzzing]
[scene cuts to Rarity making her way up the mountain when she suddenly comes across a ledge with a large snake looking down at her. She freezes, petrified as she stares back with her pupils shrunken]
Rarity: [gulps] N-N-Nice snake...good little snake...d-don't mind me, I'm just...climbing u-up the mountain...n-now if you could just-
[the snake suddenly hisses at her, causing the unicorn to shriek and spark a burst of magic from her horn out of fright, hitting the ledge and causing the snake to fall down as it just misses her before it settles down on a ledge just several inches away from Rufus' current ledge]
Rarity: Sorry!
Rufus: Huh? [looks to his left to see the snake not too far away and his pupils shrink in fear] YIP! GOTTA GO! [begins to furiously scratch up the mountain away from the snake]
[scene cuts to Jo and Emerald almost at the top of the mountain as the two glare at each other as they climb]
[static buzzing]
Jo: Emerald's conniving. Mean. Deceitful. Usually, I would classify that as my kind of competitor, but with her? No way I'm touchin' that.
[static buzzing]
Emerald: I know that if I don't win this challenge, I'm the one those peasants are going to target, so of course I wasn't going to let Jo win. And it seems my calls were heard.
[static buzzing]
[Emerald roughly grabs at Jo's arm and the two begin to squirm about in place]
Jo: ARGH, hands off, dirtbag!
Emerald: GRR, I refuse!
[at that moment, Steele begins to approach the two tussling females]
Steele: Well, looks like I just found me an opening. [begins to make his way around the two when all of a sudden, the ledge he tries to stand on break away, leaving him to hang onto the wall with his bare claws] GAH! Damn!
Emerald: [looks to her left and notices the malamute] What the-AH! [feels Jo finally break free from her grasp]
Jo: Nice try, but not good enough!
[scene cuts to the top of the mountain]
Chris: And it looks like Jo is gonna be the first one to the top!
[scene cuts back to Jo]
Jo: Heh, I knew there'd be nothin' to-[the ledge she grabs onto suddenly breaks, causing her to gasp as she falls several feet down the mountain]-OH NO! [lands on a ledge with a hard THUD] OOF!
Chris: Or, maybe not.
[scene cuts to a pair of hands reaching the edge of the mountain...the pair of hands reveals to be...]
Chris: And we have our winner...Emerald!
Emerald: [panting] I...I made it...oooooh, eat your hearts out, you common…[plops onto the ground on her back due to the heavy pack]...oh, get off me!
Chris: [as the scene shows the remaining contestants in various locations along the rockface] Now, as for the rest of you, I'd be feeling pretty tense right about now. While Emerald's safe...again, you're all still at risk for elimination, which will be decided at tonight's campfire ceremony!
Jo: Ugh…
[scene cuts to Rarity and Jo sitting on the steps of the cabins]
Rarity: Well...that was a disaster…
Jo: Hmph, don't need to tell me twice…
Rarity: So...who do we vote for now…?
Jo: Hmm...to be honest...I'm not really sure…
Rarity: Hmm...same…
[scene cuts to Rufus and Steele standing by a river]
Rufus: So...I guess that happened…
Steele: Another victory swiped from my claws...f**king hell…
Rufus: Yeah...um, who do you think we should vote for…?
Steele: If I'm gonna be honest, I have no idea...this just f**king sucks…
Rufus: Hmm…agreed…
[scene cuts to black, at the Campfire Ceremony]
Chris: The final five, soon to be the final four. As you're all aware, Emerald cannot be voted out due to having immunity, but the rest of you...it's best to say your prayers now and hope that you'll be safe...except one of you. [chuckles]
[static buzzing]
Steele: Honestly, what really sucks that I'm voting for someone I wouldn't mind seeing stay around...like, no disrespect, I'm just at my wits end.
[static buzzing]
Chris: Alright, the votes are in. The following players are safe: Emerald [catches the marshmallow]...Steele [catches the marshmallow]...and Rarity [catches the marshmallow]. Which leaves Jo and Rufus...one of you has spent their final day of competing...but which of you is it…[Jo and Rufus glance at each other]...without further ado...the final marshmallow goes to…
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Rufus!
Rufus: [breathes a sigh of relief as he catches the marshmallow]
Jo: [sighs and stands up] Guess 5th place is my "lucky placement" or something…
Chris: Jo, the Dock of Shame awaits you.
[scene cuts to the Dock of Shame with the remaining contestants standing at attention as Jo boards the Boat of Losers]
Steele: Hey...sorry about that back there…
Jo: [pauses and then sighs] Ya' did what ya' needed to do...still, I respect someone who gets me, ya' know. Also, make sure to kick Emerald's butt for me, won't you?
Steele: Heh, no doubt about it...take care, Jo.
Jo: You too...Steele.
[the Boat of Losers departs from the dock and sets off into the night before disappearing into the horizon]
Chris: And then there were four, can they handle any more? I say...yes! It's gonna be two down, two to go...to the finals and the million! Next time on Total...Drama...Reloaded!
[scene cuts to black as the episode ends]