Kaba-Bunraku

"You think we can catch him if we trick him into doing a puppet show?"

Mon couldn't help but let his curiosity build and grow inside him as he and his brothers carefully looked down from the rafters below. Carefully scanning the wooden performance stage below, the guys were hoping to catch some faint glimpse of the mutant they came to find.

"Sure, if he likes his puppets as much as his own pet," Hoku answered his little brother's question on behalf of his other two elder brothers. "Finding his hobbies is as easy as finding a hippo in a lacquer shop."

"Haha, funny! I wonder what hippo that'd be!" Basho gave a mock-laugh with a roll of his eyes and a slacked smile, not really amused but humoring his younger brother anyway.

Having headed over to Osaka Shochikuza Theatre after getting a news report of professional entertainers going missing within its surrounding areas, the guys only had one clue to go on. The first entertainer to vanish was cited as a stage magician who performed with large animals, and ever since that happened, similar entertainers who performed with any sort of critters, big or small, pet or loaned, were being snatched away too. Their most obvious clue, fortunately for them, was the fact that the news compiled bystander accounts to sum up the one responsible as having the appearance of a hippo walking on two legs.

"Okay guys," Hiro readied himself on a rafter to jump down. "I guess we should get this show started." He took a moment to primp himself until he was nice and fluffy inside his goofy mascot suit. "Gotta look good for the big guy."

"Oh, just one more thing," Mon cut in energetically. Fishing out a small bottle of a pink liquid from his shell, he held it up to Hiro and squeezed a ball attached to a tube to spray the substance all over him. He sprayed several times to get the tailor-made fragrance all over the snapping turtle's hippo costume. Hiro, on the other hand, breathed it all in with a dreamy look on his face, as if he were relaxing in a bed of cherry blossom petals. Once he felt he was ready, Hiro leapt right down and landed on the stage with his own two feet.

"Time to put on the rosiest show Osaka's ever seen!" Hiro smiled and gave himself a confidence boost before placing the clunky hippo mask over his head.

At the same time, the other three turtles jumped down from the metal rafters that held the nearby stage lights and landed next to their brother. Standing in the center of the shining light, the three of them were clad from neck to feet in single tight black suits, the whole of the fabrics hugging their entire bodies.

"Puppet ready?" Basho asked Hoku and Mon with relaxed determination, carefully paying attention to his double-checking for his brothers' preparation for their plan that was currently in operation. The blue and orange-masked turtles answered him by raising the body-sized puppet they held together in front of them and twiddled the sticks attached to its limbs, making the marionette move its limbs in a handwave in accordance. Basho lightly shook his head at his brothers' antics, though he wasn't displeased. Though for him personally, this operation would've been a lot more entertainingly poetic had their target planned to strike at the National Bunraku Theatre instead.

There was nothing unusual about the puppet being as big as it was instead of being hand-sized, nor was there anything weird about the way its turtle puppeteers were dressed. This was, after all, going to be an actual hands-on demonstration of the bunraku art. Basho, Hoku, and Mon were dressed up in all-black body suits and would soon don full-headed mask-hoods over their heads, completely obscuring their bodies in black. They would then hide behind the life-sized puppet they had hand in hand, manipulating it with the sticks attached to its limbs to effectively play-act once their hippo target finally arrived on the scene.

Hiro, of course, was still the main event, wearing the hippo costume and having been sprayed with the scent of a female of the same species. Once he got the hippo guy's attention, he would keep him in a stupor long enough to get close to him and slow him down personally so that the rest of his brothers could get an opening to neutralize him themselves. But in case that approach didn't work immediately, then Basho, Hoku, and Mon would prepare themselves by spraying the puppet with the scent of an opposing male hippo, in which the scent would make him feel competitive enough to get distracted by it while all four would jump him.

Basho got behind the puppet with Hoku and Mon to get into place, with all three of the puppeteers donning their full masks. At the same time, Hiro braced himself for the imminent arrival of their target, knowing it was going to happen very soon. After all, it had been hours since they transmitted that fake broadcast concerning a 'new upstart entertainer with the best trained pet' making his debut at Shochikuza. All they had to do now was wait.

They waited. The stage was empty, dim with the exception of a spotlight or two, and plainly dead silent except for the tapping of feet.

"Min'na, yametenka!" Hiro tried to say from inside the hippo mask, though it came out considerably muffled.

"Kan'nin'na, nīchan.Kōhatsu-sha o mattoru tte ki wa shaanai," Basho answered from underneath his tightfitting mask, his voice coming out slightly muffled as well.

"Nan?" Mon asked from under his own mask, apparently not having understood what his older brother had said through his mask.

*CRASH*

The turtles' attention was swiftly caught by the sound of doors being smashed open and apart at the end of the performance hall, way at the back of all the seats sitting below the stage. The dust kicked up from the interruption then cleared, unveiling the intruder to be a rather large top-heavy man. He wore a purple dress suit complemented by a pair of brown dress shoes and a white dress shirt underneath his jacket with the collar secured by a red bowtie. He also wore a light purple turban on his head, but it was his head itself that told the turtles that their mark had indeed finally arrived: he had the face of a dark grey hippo, only endowed with a curly black moustache and traces of black hair under his turban.

"Mysterious new entertainer! It is I, Kabatsukai!" the bipedal hippo man announced loudly, his voice traveling across the theatre hall. "Prepare to have the shortest career of any performer in Osakan history!"

Hiro stood in place, waiting for and hoping his brothers would pick up the cue to begin the charade. Basho, Hoku, and Mon began manipulating the sticks, moving every body part of the mannequin-sized puppet to start acting. But of course, it wasn't enough to merely play the puppet – the three also had to make it talk. If only the guys actually planned, or at least agreed, on who would be the voice…

Fortunately, Hoku was a born entertainer, or at least the most naturally compulsive as far as entertainers went. "Why hello there, kaba-han! I see you have astounding tastes in showy entrances, since you did so to see my show." Basho and Mon sweated a little from how stilted and wooden Hoku's delivery of those words was. "I am the great fire puppet 'Kugutsu-chi', and today, I will show you the birth of a new dance!"

The hippo-man Kabatsukai snorted, taking wide steps forward down the aisle towards the stage, brandishing a pair of palm-sized metal rings in his hands. "Well then, by all means, let's dance, because I got a new style that's going to blow you right off this stage!" He flicked his wrists to clink the metal rings together into an interlinking chain, which made the turtles gawk a little at how the guy did that without physically splitting the rings.

The guys had to act fast to avoid giving the hippo-man any chance to get suspicious. After all, they did say there was going to be an opening act, so it was time to start acting.

Mon was the first to move the sticks he was holding, causing the puppet to move its legs underneath the lower half of the kimono draped over it, though it did seem a little odd that he would move the legs in a manner that implied a seductive dancer (The other three turtles made a mental note to check on what Mon had been watching on TV once they were finished here).

Hoku then manipulated his puppet-sticks to move the arms, making them wave in circles in a way meant to be mystifying.

Basho manipulated his part of the puppet to take control of its head, not simply moving the neck but also its facial features, which were each its own moving part. Basho tweaked the little parts to make the face raise its eyebrows, open its mouth, adjust its cheeks into a smile, and even blink.

Hoku continued to play out the character despite trying to hide the nervous timbre in his voice. "Well, I sure hope you came with 'moderately low' expectations…" he wrestled through a pause to scramble his brain for a good line, "…because…prepare to have them…strung up?" Everyone was biting their lip.

Fortunately, the plan began to kick in once he got close enough. The scent of female hippo that was sprayed on Hiro's hippo suit earlier had enough time to travel through the air and reach the hippo-man's nose, causing him to pause and take a deep-breathed sniff. The effect was instantaneous.

"Maido, misshī," Kabatsukai greeted suavely, zipping over to Hiro in his hippo suit and making him fall into his arm back first in a dipping position. "Didn't take you for the stage life. Did you know I'm a magician?"

Hiro was feeling nervously tense about how the hippo got up close to him so fast, so apart from how awkward the hippo's reaction was making him feel, he didn't want to give himself away by talking either. He shook his head, making the hippo mask he wore do the same.

Kabatsukai spoke again after getting his answer. "Well, lovely to make your acquaintance, mam. I am, or was, Mezmer-Ron, the acclaimed stage magician of Osaka's central theatre chain, my fame stretching across Chuo and Tennoji," his voice rapidly dropping into a low mutter, "until recently…"

The hippo-man momentarily reminisced on how well his stage career once was back in his days as Mezmer-Ron, how it flourished with his own theatrical flairs until a lone green-glowing mosquito had drifted in, landed on him, and stung him. It was already unfortunate enough for him to happen while he was in the middle of performing a levitating act on his four-legged assistant, a hippopotamus which he had affectionately named Kumi. What became of his body after that was instantaneous and painful – warping, twisting, enlarging every part of him until he looked like some twisted version of his beloved Kumi herself. To rub salt in the wound, he realized he ended up hurting Kumi in his transformation once he came to his senses, to the point that she no longer moved. That scene would haunt him as much as his newfound magical powers would toward his victims.

But now wasn't the time to be daydreaming. His nose twitched at the whiff of a second new scent, one that set off his newly ingrained territorial aggression. Kabatsukai turned to face the source of the foreign male hippo scent to find himself staring at the tall human-sized kabuki-like puppet standing before him, with its three puppeteers hiding behind it and controlling its every movement. "So then, Kugutsu-chi, not only do you compete against my royalty on the stage, but also in the mating season!" He initially looked like there was going to be bad blood between him and the puppet, but instead of the expected angry look, his face instead lightened into one of casual relaxed superiority. The terrapin puppeteers sans Hiro wondered why he chose to totally subvert expectations when they noticed him shortly pull out his metal rings again. "Why don't we settle this with a dual performance, one where I cut your wood down to size?"

"That's not gonna raku-go, much less fly," Hoku whispered under his breathe, feeling tempted with an urge to sweat if not say what he whispered out loud to the hippo-man's face.

Kabatsukai, on the other hand, was simply more content with letting his metal rings fly anyway. With a wave of his hands, the chain of distinguishably sharp hoops clinked against one another while floating in the air, spinning at the speeds of chainsaws. Hoku, along with Basho and Mon, had a feeling that a simple 'dance to the beat of the drum' wasn't going to work out, so they figured moving fast would be better. The three leapt in the air to land on the next corner of the show stage as the first ring flew at them and embedded itself in the wooden flooring. Kabatsukai compensated by scattering some more flying metal rings at the puppet, making them roll in the air and skate across the stage flooring again, leaving deep scratch marks all over the wood as they wove through the air to get at the puppet. In a last-second act of improv, Hoku, Basho, and Mon all jumped into the air and assumed a ninja posture, which led to them mimicking that same pose on the puppet, making the puppet look like a ninja master. Kabatsukai threw a couple rings up at the puppet, making the three turtles manipulate the puppet's parts to dodge the strikes and even deflect a few of them as though the puppet itself was doing the fighting. The puppet landed right in front of him, which led to the two exchanging a tango of flourishing moves as they tried to land a hit on each other.

Hiro thought this was a good time to try and get the jump on the hippo-man, so as he carefully watched his brothers continue to distract the guy with the puppet, he tiptoed around the edge of the fray until he had a clear beeline shot for the magician. He bent his knees and tensed his leg muscles, getting ready to pounce on him when…

*ZING*

Hiro doubled back, nearly falling onto his behind, when an oncoming strike from Basho's rocket-powered staff swooped in an arc in his direction. Hiro would have most certainly lost his footing if it weren't for Kabatsukai briefly sniffing and turning around to notice and then slide over to the hippo-disguised snapping turtle, extending an arm to catch him back first. It was a repeat of the same dipping pose from when the magician first arrived, only this time, he was kneeling.

"Ikeruya nen, koibito!" Kabatsukai said to Hiro reassuringly with a mock-hero's tone. "I wouldn't have known you needed my rescue if it wasn't for my powerful nose…" he leaned in closer to whisper, "…and your lovely scent."

Hiro gagged silently. "Okay. Let's get on with this!" he mentally huffed. Unlocking his hippo mask, Hiro then slipped under and away from Kabatsukai while the magician was busy planting smooches all over the aforementioned mask.

The hippo-magician's eyes were closed as he did so. It was after a few seconds of that smooching that he noticed his would-be missus wasn't responsive. He cracked open an eye to take a peek, then snapped both wide open when he realized he was smooching only a hippo head in his hands.

"Gah!" he yelped loudly at the sudden sight, driving him to look the head over in all directions, simultaneously turning the empty mask and scanning with his eyes at every angle of the mask. It was after he took a look at the clean hole at the bottom and then over to the now unmasked Hiro standing alongside his black clad brothers who revealed themselves from behind the puppet. His face morphed from shock to disappointment. "Aw phooey! The old false Ginny trick got pulled over my eyes!" he commented out loud in a harrumph, then sighed. "I gotta say that this has been the worst mating season all year." Without any further fuss, he went back to unleashing more of his magically levitating rings. "Oh well, not like you were Kumi anyway!"

"Now that is one fine-dressed and gentlemanly mutant!" Hoku resumed his signature compulsion for quipping. The four turtles were stoked for a smackdown at that point.

"Alright guys, let's smash this big-snout!" Hiro rallied his brothers before they all dashed to take a swipe at the magician.

The four then made their first move, with Hiro reading his Tonfas and the other three still operating the bunraku puppet. Learning from fighting the puppet earlier, Kabatsukai flourished a trio of rings that made a swirling motion around the puppet that culminated in an erratic tornado-like dance of flying audible dings. The guys were only able to make the puppet fend off just two ring strikes when they were rapidly overwhelmed, forcing the three to split and leave the puppet to be eviscerated to pieces by the rest of the metal rings. They took advantage of the magician's concentration on destroying the puppet to try and deliver some of their signature moves.

Mon spun his Kusari-fundo chain to try and ensnare the hippo. Basho activated an electric-powered stun feature in his staff to deliver an attempted taser attack. Hoku came down with his sword over his head to slash at any flying rings in his way, plus the hope that he could knock off the magician's pink turban. Hiro went with the good old-fashioned smash-and-dash with his Tonfas.

The hippo-magician proved remarkably adept at paying attention to his foes' attacks, as if that was any surprise at all. He only had to surround himself in his flying metal rings that acted as his own blades to shield himself as he took a bit of time to get a look at all his blind spots. He did some jumps and backflips of his own as he dodged the turtles' hampered strikes, even fitting in a few midair spins. Apart from slapping away Hoku's sword strikes and Basho's electrified staff swings with his intercepting rings, he made a carefully timed jump just when Hiro smashed a magic-charged Tonfa punch into the planked floor, shattering the wood until there was a splintered hole in the middle of the stage. When the chain from Mon's weapon managed to find its mark and coil around the magician's large body, Kabatsukai only got on one foot and did a ballerina spin in the opposite direction of Mon's chain, making the chain widen just enough for him to jump out of the fiery loop, doing a graceful pose in the process.

Mon felt a little miffed at how the hippo got out of his trap so cleverly, so after spotting Hiro's discarded hippo mask at the rear corner of the stage, he leapt over to seize it with the intent of slam-dunking it on the magician's head like a double-ironic blinder. He prepped himself by jumping onto the set pieces that stood at the back of the stage, no doubt left over from the last performance staged by the theatre's human performers. He made it to the top and jumped off in the hippo's direction.

At the same moment, Kabatsukai took aim at the turtles coming at him from all sides. He smirked, since as a magician, he still had one card up his sleeve, one that he had kept hidden up to this point. Opening his hippo maw wide open, he let out a loud and drawn out shout that sounded like a hollow echo, saying, "MEZMER-ROOOOOOOONNN!" The turtles were stopped in midair by the magician's resounding voice, briefly expressing bewilderment at how this was happening before the pupils in their eyes were replaced by psychedelic swirls. As soon as that happened, the guys instantly fell into a hypnotic trance, helpless before the hippo-man.

Kabatsukai gave a malicious victory laugh as he looked upon the turtles' defenseless state, feeling the rush from now getting to take his time with them. "Now then, which one of you should I do my half-and-half trick on first?" He examined his potential victims carefully. "Should I go with Playful Purple?" he mused out loud while pointing at Basho. "Baby Blue?" he then pointed at Hoku. His hand moved away from Hoku and past Mon, who was holding the discarded hippo mask in both hands in front of his face, until his attention rested on Hiro who was still dressed in the rest of the hippo costume. "Oh yes," he sneered with a twisted grin, "I think I'll start with you, Big Red, or should I call you, Ugly Trickster?" Kabatsukai flicked out one extra metal ring from his sleeve and held it next to Hiro's neck, the sharp hoop of metal spinning rapidly with an intent to fatal cut and slice as its wielder slowly inched it closer and closer to the hypnotized snapping turtle's jugular.

He got extremely close to doing something bad to Hiro's neck when he was suddenly startled by the sight of something hollow being slam-dunked over his head, rendering his vision completely black. "Wha–!?" he cried, now flailing his hands around in confusion. "Donata-han ga akari o keshi-tachi ~yuu wakeya ka?"

It didn't take long for him to find what was around his head, however. He grabbed at the thing over his head and yanked it off, returning his vision to the theatre stage he stood on and finding in his hands the same hippo mask he handled earlier. To his chagrin, he also noticed the little orange-masked turtle – Mon – clambering onto his still-hypnotized and levitating brothers, trying to shake then by their faces to make them come back to their senses. "You're not hypnotized?" Kabatsukai exclaimed with a loud shock, "But…how!?"

"Uh…" Mon held his voice as he tried to answer.

It took a second of gathering his thoughts, but Mon remembered having felt the wavy and kinetic magic energy surrounding him when Kabatsukai sounded his hypnotizing voice. He acutely remembered that power being enough to hold him up in the air when he was in mid-jump, but he most certainly was having clear thoughts. When he turned his head to look around in order to make sense of what just happened, he had a really good idea of it upon noticing his brothers looking rather loopy, both in how their eyes changed into spirals and how slackjawed and quiet they were. It then dawned on him that the reason he was like that was thanks to the hippo mask he held right in front of his face at that moment, which not only protected him, but also reminded of his intent to plonk the thing onto the mutant hippo from the very beginning.

"Well, I guess I will say that you're definitely the slippery one," said Kabatsukai, who prepared to unleash another set of flying rings, though he levitated then between his hands for the moment. "Chikara o kanjiru junbi o shina hare!"

Mon, at that moment, felt absolutely sure that he was going to need a new plan of his own, and it was going to need a little bit of time. He dashed as the rings began flying at him, unable to do anything but play keep-away with the hippo magically for the time being. He did recall on the fly that he escaped being hypnotized because he didn't see Kabatsukai when he attacked, so he looked everywhere the hippo wasn't. But then things started going south for him when his path was intercepted by a metal ring that zipped by in front of him so fast that he almost fell backwards. He looked all around to find that the hippo had surrounded him in rapidly moving rings, forcing Mon to stay in place lest he make a move and get cut by any one of the rings.

"Jikkō yaru basho ga hen, little orange," Kabatsukai taunted Mon as he slowly closed the circle formed by the rings, making it smaller and move closer to the littlest turtle. "Get ready for my next trick where I make you disappear." With that said, he got ready to slice up the box turtle in an increased speed.

But Mon did the one thing he could think of, which was to fling the chain of his Kusari-fundo upwards at the stage rafters and grapple it on one of the metal beams, then pull himself up and out of the ring trap, ascending into the scaffolding and perching himself high above the magician's reach. Mon would have resumed panicking over what to do next, but he thought of something once he took notice of the spotlights hanging on the framed beam he perched on.

"Time to put some space between you," came Kabatsukai's arranged pre-mortem one-liner, flinging a set of three rings right at Mon above.

But just as the rings arced and zeroed in on the little turtle, Mon had already gotten a hold of a couple spotlights. Mon did a jumping flip when the rings came and dinged along the metal-framed beam and landed back down on it. As soon as he did, he whipped the chain ball of his weapon directly towards an electrical wall panel down below, flipping a light switch. The spotlights flashed on, shooting a pair of intense and concentrated beams of light directly into the hippo-mutant's face, making him yelp painfully as he stopped what he was doing to shield his eyes from the blinding light with his hands. As he preoccupied himself with that, he didn't notice Mon swooping back down to retry his binding trick on him, this time successfully winding the chain around the magician's large body and throwing him up into the air before slamming him down onto the red-cushioned audience seats just at the foot of the stage.

Kabatsukai recovered from the mess of shattered seats he was lying down on to face the orange-masked turtle standing on the stage above him, looking down on him with a smug look on his face. Seeing that made him mad.

"That's it!" he yelled as he got back on his feet, stomping on a shattered backrest as he took a deep snort-rumbling breath and shouted, "MEZMER-ROOOOOOOONNN!" Just like before, the hypnotizing soundwaves flew out of his mouth towards his target with the intent of putting him in a trance alongside his brothers.

However, what he wasn't paying attention to was that Mon, in that same instant, had raised a couple of spotlight lenses he had popped off another pair of neighboring spotlights earlier. He held the two curved pieces of glass together as one in that short time it took for the magician's voice to reach him. In that same moment, the traveling soundwaves collided with the lens and bounced off of it, sending them back the exact opposite direction of their source, returning to their sender.

Kabatsukai didn't know what hit him, not that he could. The hypnotic voice that was sent right back at him put him right into the same trance as the other three turtles he had done it to earlier. His knees buckled and he fell right down onto a sitting position, his eyes swirling in complete unawareness as he fell victim to his own hypnosis.

At the same time, the hypnotic trance that Mon's brothers were under vanished instantly, awareness completely returning to their vision as their eyes reverted back from spirals to iris and pupils. It also had the additional effect of ceasing their immobilizing levitation, allowing them to set their feet back down onto the planked stage floor.

Basho was the first one to find his voice again after coming back to his senses. "Huh? Now what happened here?"

"Yeah! Did we just win?" Hoku joined his brother's inquiry.

Mon nodded his heads while giving a victorious grin with his hands on his hips. "Uh-huh, and you're welcome, by the way."

Hiro was quick to congratulate his littlest brother. "Yōya sooya de ~e, Mon! Couldn't have made it without you!" He went over and have Mon a heartfelt pat on the shoulder, to which Mon received warmly. Hiro then went on to fiddle with the hippo suit still around his person. "Finally! I can get out of this thing! It's gotten so hot in there!"

"Hey wait, Hiro!" Hoku interjected before Hiro could go further with undressing. "I don't think that costume's so bad on you." He stepped closer to the snapping turtle to look over the costume. "If anything, it makes me proud I got your size just right."

"Yeah. Not to mention it does a good job keeping all your emotions in," Hoku cut in jokingly.

"Hoku, come on!" Mon huffed disappointedly, with Hiro showing a face of similar dismay behind him.

"What?" Hoku held up his hands in surrender, "Is it wrong that I don't want to smell what Hiro's feeling all the time?"

None of the three other turtles had time to idle and come up with a retort when the distant and muffled sounds of a crowd of humans reached their ears, making them trace the origin of the voices to the back of the auditorium, which was where the main entrance and lobby of the theatre was.

"Guys?" Basho spoke up in time to see the humans rapidly peek through the hole Kabatsukai had made to see the turtles still standing on the stage.

"Look!" came the calling voice of one human who pointed at the turtles for the others to see. "It's gotta be the mysterious new entertainer that's been shown on the internet!" The guys were then bombarded by another unexpected question. "What are you guys showing?"

"…" The guys exchanged tensed wordless glances with each other, rapidly beginning to sweat all the more intensely. Luckily, Hiro always made a plan. "Uh…Actually," Hiro yelled over to the approaching humans, "Show's over! You missed it! Sorry!" He made sure to give a polite, though awkward smile, which his brothers imitated in turn.

The humans at the back appeared to look a little disappointed. "But…" one of them began to object.

"Guys! Smoke bombs!" Hiro hurriedly exclaimed to his brothers. This time, none of the guys fumbled on that part of the plan. Before the humans could step inside the auditorium and get closer to the scene…

*POOF*

The humans were speechless, astounded at how the turtles vanished from the stage the moment the smoke clouds dissipated. But despite the initial confusion, they showed no hesitation in drawing out their phones and texting everything they saw as they walked back out the theatre and talked among themselves.

No doubt Uzuki was going to be talking to the guys about this…

New mutant: Introducing the hippo stage magician and hypnotist, Kabatsukai (カバツカイ|カバ使い), Osaka's – and Japan's – very own 'Hypno-potamus'. Back when he was a human stage magician, he went by the stage-name 'Mezmer-Ron' (メズマロン) who performed with his pet girl-hippopotamus Kumi (久美), who is the counterpart to Doug. Together, they were an inseparable magical duo, at least until the magician's mutation. His new name is a portmanteau of the terms 'kaba' (カバ 'hippo') and 'mahōtsukai' (魔法使い 'magician/wizard').

Osaka Shochikuza Theatre (大阪松竹座) is a theater in the Dotonbori district of Osaka that first opened in 1923. Its design is meant to emulate a Neo-Renaissance style, modelled particularly after the Teatro alla Scala in Milan, Italy. When it was first built, it started out as both a movie theater and a venue for musicals. Today, it's known for staging classical Kabuki drama, along with new contemporary dramas, musicals, comedies, and opera.

The National Bunraku Theatre (国立文楽劇場) is an arts venue that opened in 1984. It was built specifically to host and preserve the traditional bunraku art. It is not only an entertainment venue, but also has both training facilities for performers and a museum/archive for historical materials rolled in one. It is, for all intents and purposes, a cultural heritage center.

Bunraku (文楽), also known as Ningyō-Jōruri (人形浄瑠璃), is a form of traditional Japanese puppet theatre, combining puppet-acting with chanting and instrumental music. It's basically what you get when you combine a run-of-the-mill puppet show with larger-scale stage aesthetics. It was invented in Osaka at the beginning of the 17th century when the playwright Chikamatsu Monzaemon (近松 門左衛門) did a collaboration with the chanter Takemoto Gidayu (竹本 義太夫). The term "Ningyō-Jōruri" is such because the combination of chanting and shamisen playing is called 'jōruri' (浄瑠璃) and the Japanese word for puppet is 'ningyō' (人形), which is synonymous with dolls. In bunraku, there are 3 kinds of performers: the Ningyōtsukai/Ningyōzukai (人形遣い｜人形使い - puppeteers), the Tayū (太夫 - chanters), and shamisen musicians (The shamisen -三味線- is a traditional Japanese string instrument that's based off the Chinese lute). All but the most minor puppet characters are controlled by 3 puppeteers, who are completely visible to the audience. These puppeteers generally wear black robes, though in most traditions, they also wear black hoods over their heads. There are a few exceptions, such as in the National Bunraku Theatre, who leave the main puppeteer unhooded. This is a performance style known as 'dezukai'.

Dialect Phrases:
Min'na, yametenka (みんな、やめてんか): "Everyone, stop that!" | Standard: Min'na, yamete (みんな、やめて)
Kan'nin'na, nīchan (堪忍な、兄ちゃん): "Sorry, big bro." | Standard: Gomen ne, nīsan (ごめんね、兄さん)
Kōhatsu-sha o mattoru tte ki wa shaanai (後発者を待っとるってきはしゃーない): "I can't help it when waiting for a latecomer." | Standard: Kōhatsu-sha o matte iru toki wa shikataganai (後発者を待っているときは仕方がない)
Nan (なん): "What?" | Standard: Nani (何)
Kaba-han (カバはん): "Mr. Hippo" | Standard: Kaba-san (カバさん)
Maido, misshī (まいど、ミッシー): "Hey there, Missy" | Standard: Kon'nichiwa, misshī (こんにちは、ミッシー)
Ikeruya nen, koibito (いけるやねん、恋人): "It's alright, my sweet!" | Standard: Daijōbudesu, koibito (大丈夫です、恋人)
Donata-han ga akari o keshi-tachi ~yuu wakeya ka (どなたはんが明かりを消したちゅうワケやか): "Who turned out the lights?" | Standard: Dare ga akari o keshita nodesu ka (誰が明かりを消したのですか)
Chikara o kanjiru junbi o shina hare (力を感じる準備をしなはれ): "Get ready to feel the power!" | Standard: Chikara o kanjiru junbi o shi nasai (力を感じる準備をしなさい)
Jikkō yaru basho ga hen (実行やる場所がへん): "Nowhere to run" | Standard: Jikkō suru basho ga nai (実行する場所がない)
Yōya sooya de ~e, Mon (ようやそーやでぇ、モン): "Great job, Mon!" | Standard: Yoku yatta, Mon (よくやった、モン)

* Hoku's puppet name "Kugutsu-chi" is a pun on "Kagutsuchi" (カグツチ), the primordial Shinto god of destructive fire. Hoku also makes mention of "rakugo" (落語), which is Japanese stand-up comedy that involves the comedian sitting down (Ironic!) in the middle of the stage with only a paper fan and hand towel for props in both hands while telling a long-winded, complicated, but funny story.