In the car, Adam leans back on the passenger seat breathing heavily. Michael speeds off immediately. For minutes, they both stay silent. Michael is panting equally hard as he drives, probably breaking all the speed limits but neither of them care. Adam's head is spinning with the thoughts still rushing in his mind and his heart racing wildly. He tries to focus on just inhaling and exhaling slowly to calm himself down a bit.

What just happened?

The mental question brings a flood of new thoughts, images and memories to him. He remembers the last two months or so and even he can't believe it himself. Did he really quit his work of two years at a whim, after a fight of which he lived through everyday? Did he really brush off Crowley, Kevin, Benny and everyone else who tried to warn him? Did he really move in with Zachariah, watch idly as he divorced his wife, accept his proposal and even go to the ceremony to actually go through with it? Was he really going to become Zachariah's husband? What was he thinking? Did he really believe those manipulative whispers in his ears and the promises Zachariah kept reciting as if telling a bedtime story to a toddler? Did he believe he could have a life married to a man like that? How?

Never once have I judged you for what you had to do to survive, brother. But this time, I think you are doing this purposefully. You are tormenting yourself. You have spent your life being bent. Now you are trying to break yourself just so you can finally be allowed to give up fighting. Was Benny actually right when he said all that? Was Adam really dragging himself into a situation like that in his suffering? Was he really… self-destructive?

Even the thought makes him tremble all over. He looks down at himself and realizes that somehow the flowers stayed in his hand after their great escape from the church. He takes a deep breath and presses on the button to roll down the window before throwing the bouquet out. The air washes over his face, messing his perfectly styled hair. Honestly, it relieves Adam more than it probably should. So when he leans back again, he lets the window stay open and doesn't care at all as his hair slowly turns into a messy, knotty pile on his head and his suit gets wrinkled from the leather seat he presses himself to. Right now, he wants nothing more than to get this ridiculous attire off himself. The only thing he can do is to loosen the tie with shaking fingers as the adrenalin in his system finally starts to run out and the panic catches up.

"Michael! You came to get- You-" The slap never lands. Adam notices he screwed his eyes shut and opens them to see Zachariah struggling to free his wrist from the strong fingers pinning his hand in the air. Michael caught him. "-You touched him."

Adam is wide eyed and almost breathless with the excitement from the moment. Michael's fingers squeeze the wheel for a second than the older man relaxes again. "Honestly, I don't know how I did that myself. Are you okay, Adam?" The car slows down having made it to the familiar streets of the neighbourhood Michael lives in. The green eyes looking at Adam are tender and filled with concern. Not pity. Concern. And that on it's own is foreign. No one else ever looked at him like that. They were either genuinely pitying Adam or plotting to manipulate and use him somehow. Of course there was Benny but the man never let Adam see this look on his face fearing Adam would confuse his affection and concern for pity and react ferally. Now that Adam thinks, he would. So it's a total first that he is able to recognize what he sees reflecting in the seafoam green he is searching.

"I- I am okay, I guess. I just- Things are happening all around and fast. And I can't- I don't think I understand anything right now. I feel like I have been run over by a truck. That's probably the adrenaline rush coming down but my head is heavy too. Michael I- The last time I saw you- Then you came. You came. How? And Benny… We left Benny there." The last part comes to him at an instant and his heart leaps with something akin to fear for a second. He doesn't even know why he is afraid. Sure Zachariah is an influential and rich businessman but what can he do to Benny? Sure they interrupted his wedding and technically left with the groom but- But Adam shouldn't think about those things. Not now at least.

"Don't worry, Adam. Benny knows the address. He will come to my flat after us. I am taking you there by the way. It's okay right? We can talk once we get there. You can rest a bit, gather yourself and then we will see what we will do afterwards." Adam nods a second after Michael finishes. What else can he do now anyway? Where else can he go? He moved out of his own flat. His things are at Zachariah's. Hell, he only has his cellphone and wallet in his pocket and the clothes on his back which he wants to be rid of as soon as possible. He doesn't feel like forcing himself on the streets like this and finding a hotel or a room to spend a few nights. He is probably- God he really lost everything he has.

Once again, he has nothing. Or rather he is nothing. He-

He realizes what Michael said. We. Him, Adam and Benny.

After everything, despite everything, he still feels lighter now.

Once they make it to Michael's flat, Adam immediately throws himself on the familiar sofa and removes the white jacket along with the tie. When he leans against the cushions, he finds he is aching everywhere except his feet. The best thing he did today was gonig with the converse shoes after all. Michael comes with a big glass of water and two mugs of coffee on a tray. Adam only notices how dry his throat and lips are as he gulps down the water.

They are both awkwardly silent for a small while. Adam takes the time to look around the flat and sees all the framed pictures with Dean in them are gone. Also the grey paint on one spot of the wall is cracked rather badly with a few pieces fallen to show the previous coat of white underneath. Michael follows his gaze and sighs. "I was very angry when I found out. And let me tell you the process of 'finding out' wasn't pretty itself. I went to his house, used my own key and caught them in the bedroom. I… was a mess for a long while.-" Adam snaps his head so fast to face Michael that he almost gives himself a whiplash. Michael saw them? Dean and- "-He was my doctor, Adam. My doctor of all people. And you know what his apology was? He said they dated back in highschool before me and when we started to drift apart- Hell, Dean probably saw him when he accompanied me to a few sessions in the first months. So since then…" Michael trails off with a tired exhale at the end. Adam simply blinks at him not knowing what to say at all.

"I- Dean is… I am their half brother. Our father was married to Sam and Dean's mother when he had… an affair which got, well, me here. His wife forgave him for what he did. He was quickly back in his home with his family and life. We were, mom and me, alone. When he found out about me, I was already twelve. Then-" He doesn't even know why he is telling these things to Michael. Why did he even start from the very beginning of his pathetic story? Still, Michael is listening intently with his eyes fixed on Adam's so he thinks he should finish what he started at least. "-mom passed away before I got into highschool. So I went to some kind of boarding school where I lived at ten months a year. In the summers, I would go to my aunt's and work at their diner. My father sent me money regularly and saw me a few times when he got away from home but that was it. I didn't really have a father. I had no one. Absolutely none after he died when I was eighteen. Officially, I wasn't even his son. I got nothing left to me from his will. I was at college, and broke. I was about to fall to the streets when- when I met Crowley through a friend. That's how I started there. Sam for himself tried to help me a few times but he too was a college kid then so he could never do anything other than meeting me for coffee if he could convince me, texting me occasionally and inviting me to family christmas or something. As if I could go. On the other hand, Dean hated me because I was the proof that his happy family wasn't so happy. His father cheated on his mother who he loves more than anything. I was- I was a forgotten child no one wanted. I had to find some way to look after myself. I had to become a doctor. It was my dream because my mom was a nurse. I- Anyway that's it. I spent two years working at that agency before I quitted."

This time, Michael is the one staying silent. Adam doesn't really mind even though he wonders what Michael is thinking about him now. "I immediately found myself another doctor and a therapist. Jo, my new therapist, told me to find you and apologize because she knew I was feeling guilty over the fight we had. I didn't even tell her everything but I knew she was right the instant she started to talk. I was confused at first. I didn't have your number, address, nothing. So I went to the agency. They didn't even let me in. I learned I was blacklisted. That was the one place I could find you but I wasn't allowed in. I… didn't give up. I went to that street for days afterwards. I was waiting for you to come to the agency or leave for something. I was hoping I could see you there because our sessions were five days a week and I was guessing you would need to drop by there for something at some point if your working hours were still the same. For days, I waited in the car just watching the people. I was about to lose hope when Benny found me. I think he too went to the agency to look for you and one of your friends there pointed out my car for him and gave him my name when they noticed I was there every day. Benny said you told him about me then- Well, that was yesterday. He said you were getting married to some old pervert because you were having a rough time and he used that to get in your head. I- Adam I was afraid. We went to see this Crowley together and literally begged him for an address we could find you. He gave us one when a friend of yours there backed us up. This morning, we saw the house was empty. Benny remembered a second address Crowley didn't deem necessary to write down. When we went to that other house, we saw two women there. This man's ex-wife and daughter lived there apparently. The lady told us about how her ex-husband was abusive. She too was a victim so she gave us the wedding invitation she somehow got and told us to stop the ceremony before it was too late. Benny and I rushed there and you saw our grand entrance at the end."

So they are trading stories now. Well, Adam can do that. It's better than being asked lots of questions at once. Part of him says it's better for Michael too and as someone getting psychological treatment, the older man learned a few things not to hurt them having this talk. What surprises him isn't that but the part about Benny and Michael meeting, teaming up and doing all that just to help him. About Benny, Adam expected for him to try something drastic along these lines to stop him. He has been waiting to be stopped by Benny for a long time now, he knows deep down. Ever since they had that first talk when Adam broke it to the man that he was quitting the agency to found a family and actually wanted Benny to not allow him to leave like that. Benny is-

Benny lost his wife Andrea years ago. For two years, Adam listened to all the tales of the woman, saw the pictures Benny still kept and ate at the diner they founded together when they first got married. He knows so much about the late woman that he feels as if he was friends with Andrea herself as he is with Benny. The older man has so much pain in him about her. He is done grieving but part of him still loves Andrea a lot. When they first met, when Adam was just eighteen and in his first weeks as an escort, Benny took one look at him and decided he was going to be all caring and protective with the young man in front of him. He immediately understood Adam had lived through a lot by that point and he was trying his best with life. Just like that, Benny became Adam's first regular client. He had hired from Juliet&Angels before but never saw the same escort twice. They had immediately found a connection. Benny was the friend, even family, Adam lacked and Adam was the supporter Benny needed to finally move on. To anyone else, this is plain unhealthy seeing as how Adam was getting paid for everything he did there and how the two of them comforted each other in both emotional and physical ways. Sometimes, they would almost pretend they were a real thing, more than friends to be more precise. Adam knows it wasn't professional too but he could never help himself.

In the two years, they slowly learned every bit about one another. They had disagreements but never fights where they hurt each other in any way. They had good days where they celebrated Benny opening a second diner, Adam passing his most important class with an A, their birthdays and every other silly thing they could think of. They had bad days where one of them was in bad shape like when Adam was slapped by a client and threatened the first time, the anniversary of Andrea's death, the anniversary of Adam's mom's death and what else they got to be sad for. They had idle days when they saw each other off the clock to simply hang out doing nothing in particular. They had busy days when Adam was helping Benny move to a new place or when Benny agreed to be the subject of an interview Adam had to do for a psychology class as the final project. They had the little moments to bring them close.

When Adam woke up alone in bed and saw Benny sitting at the kitchen table with a framed picture of him and Andrea on their wedding day, it crashed on him. He wasn't surprised. He should have been but- What he did was quickly going back to bed and getting under the covers again to pretend he never witnessed that private moment. If Benny saw him, he never said anything. And as time passed, Adam became sure that Benny thought he didn't know. But he does. Benny has… feelings. For Adam. At some point, Adam was afraid he too would turn out demanding things Adam couldn't give and he would have to leave Benny for good but the older man is something else. He never pushed anything on Adam, always asked for consent, always put Adam's wellbeing first, always supported him, was always tender. And they never 'made it weird' like they agreed from the start. What they had was something to enjoy and cherish but it wasn't binding them. They were both in need of something like that, someone like one another. That was it. It probably wouldn't be deemed right by people but it felt right. It did them good, so it was good.

Now, Adam really isn't surprised to hear Benny who has loved him for quite some time would do all that. He is thinking more about Michael. "I don't see my brothers. Just, they found a box with my name among our father's stuff in the attic. Sam asked me to go to their house and get it. I was waiting in the car for him to bring it out when I saw Dean and- and your doctor. They kissed. I couldn't do anything, couldn't move, couldn't think. I was already in shock since I learned your mysterious fiancé was Dean. I was debating whether to tell you but I was afraid of Dean trying to mess with my life. So when Sam brought me that box, I immediately left and tried to come up with something to do. In the end, I had no choice but to tell you." Michael tilts his eyes down for a second. Adam can see regret written over his face. And it's so unbelievable that he almost wants to ask. He is used to people hurting him, intentionally or not but not them feeling remorse over it. This is… new.

"After we talked, I went back to the agency to drop Juliet off. That was a regular thing. Crowley was usually very busy and we took Juliet to walks between ourselves. When we made it, both of us were… unsightly. Juliet was sensing my sadness and growling at anyone trying to protect me. I was- Well, I was crying a little. I fell down and cut my cheek too so I am sure I was truly pitiful. They- Crowley asked what happened, why I didn't call security on you and whether he should blacklist you. I told him why I was feeling bad and made sure he knew you didn't really hurt me physically. After that, I prepared to go to my next client. I was going to stay with Zachariah all night. I had seen him once before. I knew what he liked and what he wanted. Honestly, I was trying to forget the fight we had. I was feeling humiliated and I wanted to- I wanted to prove it wrong. I wanted to feel wanted, loved, beautiful. I- Zachariah was infatuated with me from the first moment he laid his eyes on me. Actually, I knew he was- I knew he would be one of those clients who turn violent when they can't get what they want but… Michael, he was so convincing. I was vulnerable. He was whispering in my ears, holding me close, being all gentle and almost worshipping. I felt- I thought I felt good with him because he looked at me with awe and he wanted me. He wanted everything that I was. I broke the rules too. I drank with him and obviously let myself be fooled. That night, he asked me to quit the agency and become his."

Adam laughs, more like chuckles bitterly, at his own tale. Michael takes a slow breath to calm his nerves. Yet the older man still doesn't say anything knowing Adam's tale isn't over yet. Adam glances at the white suit jacket and tie he carelessly dropped on the rug. He continues as Michael's gaze follows his to the garments. "Funny really, that was exactly what everyone warned me against. Crowley asked me if I was really going to become an old bastard's kept man. He said I could give him a call when I changed my mind. Benny said I was purposefully tormenting myself because I was tired of everything and needed just a bit more to be able to end myself. Kevin and everyone else from the agency tried to stop me with words, hugs, everything they could do. I didn't listen to anyone. Zachariah got in my mind so easily. I was letting him do whatever and lying myself. I thought I would be a normal person with a family, a home and a respectable job soon. I was never going to be looked down on again. I was going to be happy. I wanted all that, I did but not with Zachariah. That was what I couldn't see. I thought it didn't matter. He got divorced so fast. We applied for a licence immediately and before I knew it, I was at that church. I tried so hard, Michael. Whenever I got doubts, questions, I silenced myself. I wanted someone to love me. I thought Zachariah did and no one else would like he did. I- I was trapped. I helped him trap me. I can't thank you and Benny enough for what you did there. You were just on time. I see everything clearly now."

Michael takes another deep breath and awkwardly clears his throat. "I am sorry, Adam. I reacted violently when you were only trying to help me. I said things I shouldn't have said. I am not proud of what I did there. I realize how much pain I caused you. Maybe all this built up in you and I threw you off the top. Because of me, you nearly got yourself in something horrible. I apologize. I know it doesn't mean much but I promise I will help you fix this situation. I will repent if you let me. I- I want to be by your side with everything you will face now. I- You are not worthless. You are not an object. You are bright, witty, talented, brave and really nice. You are a good person. You helped me so much when I needed it the most. You tried to warn me against the biggest betrayal of my life. What I did in return was plain wrong. Please try to forgive me. I want to be your friend again."

To say that Adam is stunned at what he hears is a mere understatement. He opens his mouth in a silent gasp and almost drops the half empty coffee mug in his hand. "Michael… I was- I think I was never truly angry with you. I- Thank you. That means much, it does. I want to be your friend too." He doesn't even know how he managed to blurt that out in his state. Michael looks almost as shocked as him but not in a bad way. They simply look at ach other's faces soon with mirroring grins.

The doorbell is what interrupts them.

"That would be Benny." Michael rises on his feet and goes to get the door as Adam decides to carry the empty mugs and glass to the kitchen sink.

That evening, Adam stays at Michael's even though Benny invites him over to his own place. He doesn't really know why he chose that but he feels they might still have some things to talk about between the two of them. As always, Benny quickly gets the message and changes the topic. Adam has his car keys, debit cards to his accounts and his phone with all his contacts. Tonight, he will rest. Tomorrow, he will go see if he can rent his old flat back or find a similar place. He will shop for some clothes and his most necessary books. He never wants to see Zachariah again so he is leaving all his stuff. That's an easy decision to make. He can put everything he buys in his car if he can't immediately get a new place. A chunk of his savings will go to all that but at least he isn't desperate like he was two years ago without a dollar to his name. It could take up to a week or two to find a flat if he has to hunt for a new one so he might go to Benny's tomorrow then get himself a room somewhere. A few days shouldn't cost all that much, he knows. Hotels are something he learned about with the countless clients who took him to one in the two years he worked as an escort. It should be simple enough. He will focus on school for some time even if it makes him lose savings not working. He will think up about jobs later once he is all better.

Benny leaves promising Adam to come over at once if he so much gives a call or texts. Adam returns the smile he gets then closes the front door after him.

"I guess these will be a little big on you but they should fit. Tomorrow you can borrow some jeans and change in the store once we get you a few new stuff." Adam nods and thanks Michael as the older man leaves a pair of sweatpants and an old band t-shirt on the bed with a towel for him. The flat has one bedroom, another one turned into a study and two bathrooms. Unfortunately, the one joined to Michael's bedroom has the shower so Adam has to awkwardly try not to look at any personal item all the while Michael rummages his closet for something to lend Adam then goes to get him a pair of warm slippers afterwards.

Once he closes the door after himself, he finds a new toothbrush with the packaging and all on the sink along with an unopened disposable razor and a new bath scrub with the price tag still on. He sighs to himself and gets under the water immediately. For a few minutes, he does nothing but to stand under the stream and think. He was going to get married today. He probably would be in bed with a sixty-years-old man right now. Sure it is nothing he never did before. He had lots of 'mature' clients in the past. But now, even thinking about Zachariah touching him makes him want to vomit.

As the hot water almost burns him, Adam scrubs his skin hard trying to get everything left from that house and that man off himself. He stays rather long in the bathroom doing just that. Physically and mentally cleaning up as best as he can.

It's probably more than an hour later when he steps out to the bedroom with the towel around his waist and goes to the clothes on the bed. He notices that the sheets have been changed while he was taking his shower and can't give a meaning to it. As he runs a hand over the freshly washed fabric, the door opens behind him. "I- Sorry, Adam." He turns around to face Michael who was about to retreat with the newly filled bedside jug and something small that resembles a bottle of painkillers in his hands.

"It's no problem. Michael, what's all this?" He asks, gesturing to the big bed behind him. The other man looks confused at that. He tilts his eyes down to the items he holds and pointedly avoids looking at Adam as he answers.

"It's the only bedroom in the house. I can't let you sleep on the couch on top of everything. It will be a busy day for you tomorrow. You need a good night's rest, Adam." What? Michael is giving his room to Adam? That one fact bothers Adam more than it should. Yet before he can say anything else, Michael quickly places the jug and the pills on the dresser next to the door and leaves in a hurry.

Only when the older man disappears from his sight does Adam realize he is still in the towel with stray droplets of water sliding down his neck, chest and legs. Weird, he is used to being nakes in front of other people. Hell knows how many men saw him like this before. Time taught him not to get affected by that. So why does he feel hot on the face now?

When it's finally bedtime, Adam doesn't let Michael leave with the blanket and pillow he got from his wardrobe in the bedroom. "It's a queen size, Michael. You're not letting me take the couch and neither am I now. Come on, we are both adults. We can put pillows between us. I won't touch you. It will be okay. You held my hand for minutes today."

Michael shakes his head quickly and makes another move to walk past Adam. "I really can't. I know it's a big bed but- Look the couch is fine for me. I am used to spending the night there anyway. I work on case files until late hours and fall asleep there at least once a week. It's really alright."

Adam has none of it. "It's not alright. That couch is narrow. You have a session with your therapist tomorrow. It will be busy and tiring for you too. An aching back won't help you Michael.-" He explains and manages to pry the pillow from the other man's arms. "-Look, if you feel even slightly anxious, I will let you go to the couch. But let's try. Three people can comfortably fit on there. Maybe there's no need for you to suffer on the couch in vain, huh?"

After that, Michael doesn't say much else to object. As promised, Adam puts two pillows between them and they use separate sheets. Before long, he feels himself starting to drift off. And Michael doesn't really seem like he is on the verge of a panic attack so it's good he guesses. There is a huge gap between them and no possibility to touch each other through the pillows anyway.

When the morning sun shines down on his face, Adam turns on his side and snuggles the comforter around his shoulders. He is too warm, too comfortable. He almost doesn't want to get up with nothing bothering him. Except-

He hears that noise again. Is someone shouting?

"-on the newspapers! You bastard! What was he thinking!? What were you thinking!?" Instantly Adam bolts awake and gets out of the bed. The door of the bedroom is wide open. Through there, Adam can see Michael trying to shush the other man out there. With sleep replaced by adrenaline, Adam runs out and sees-

Dean.

"Okay, I made a mistake! That doesn't give you the right to involve him! You can't go get in bed with my brother just to get back at me! Adam, get away from him now!-" Dean takes a large step to take a hold of Adam's arm but Michael gets in between them. "-I can't believe you Michael! I can't! What happened to your phobia!? Were you pretending!? Adam- You have no idea. He did this to spite me! We will go together. We will talk about that wedding and sort it out, okay? I'm getting you out of-"

"Enough.-" Michael says the word in such a harsh and threatening voice that even Adam feels a shudder go down his spine. "-Not everything is about you, Dean. I am not some stalker who found your brother, of whom you never told me about by the way, and used him to hurt you. You are nothing to me now. Adam and I have nothing to do with you. The world doesn't go around you! Leave my house this instant."

As the two men fight each other, Adam backs away to the wall and watches everything with wide eyes. His breath was knocked out of him the moment Dean mentioned-

Wedding.

Newspaper.

Adam can't breathe.