The relationship that Jonny had and that filthy piece of wood transcended the common sense of anyone in the cul-de-sac. You just watched them 'talking' and immediately drew some really fascinating conclusions: it used to be thought that Plank really had a life of his own, or even more, that Plank was the brain that ran Jonny (his body).
Bullshit. Sarah wasn't in the mood for such nonsense, nor did she have the time.
"Are you sure, Plank? Isn't it risky?" He asked his friend, while tapping his ear, obstructing his little crayon mouth.
"Johnny, how can you be so stupid? Boards have no life."
The boy just turned his ear away from his friend and turned to her, with a reproachful look.
"Plank says you'll never get a boyfriend with that attitude." One punch and the boy and his board flew off at high speed, crashing into an oak tree, collapsing at his feet and being crushed by a large number of acorns. And Jonny understood what his mother always repeated to him at every opportunity: if you had nothing good to say, it was better not to say anything.
Sarah walked over to him and took him by the shirt.
"Do you think we're playing, jackass? Jimmy was kidnapped by Eddy or who knows what evil being living around here and you're..." Sarah suddenly stopped, gasping. Something had come to mind.
'…evil being…'
Jonny could have sworn to have visualized a spotlight go on over Sarah's head.
'…living around here…'
He turned to Plank, to see if he had any idea what she could have thought.
What had at first been a grimace of surprise had now briefly changed to one of fury. Just like yesterday in front of the Eds, she again blew smoke out of her ears like a kettle of boiling water. Suddenly the girl let go of Jonny's shirt, dropping him, and then shot off in one direction, speeding up. She knew where she was going, that's for sure.
Jonny, still fearful, got to his feet, took Plank, and followed her.
It was true. An idea had popped into Sarah's head. Eddy wouldn't do such a thing as kidnap Jimmy. For what? It would be absurd. There would be nothing to gain from that. And discarding the other boys, there were still them... How could she not think about it before? They were chasing one of her stupid "boyfriends" and by now they should know it.
So there they went.
"Men are all the same. Always trying to show your alpha dog image and..."
"Blah, blah, blah, blah"
'Women are such a pain. Will they ever be silent?'
Kevin walked around looking at the floor, thinking about how sometimes an argument could be won (or survived) simply by keeping quiet. It was an effective and inexpensive way, although quite impolite and even rude, but he was not exactly a polite person.
They had walked the forest for what seemed to be an hour or two, while the clouds in the sky moved slowly. They tried to have a friendly conversation, about trivial things, whatever to pass the time while they explored, but Nazz had to bring out her judgment about Kevin's alleged machismo. And of course, he never gave her another chance to kiss her.
He heard nothing but whining. So when she suddenly screamed in horror, he was violently expelled from his small consciousness. He was startled and put his hand to his heart. The high-pitched female scream nearly shattered his eardrums.
"What?! What happened?!"
"Look!" Nazz pointed to a spot in the bushes. An almost lilac blue pants could be seen peeking out.
"Jeez, Nazz! You almost scared me to death!"
She apologized and scolded him for not listening to her. They both walked over and pulled the guy out of the bush. It was Ed. He was lying face down, completely still. They turned him over and found him snoring. Nazz and Kevin looked at each other.
"Do you think he's okay?" She asked intrigued. They both thought the same thing.
"There's only one way to find out," he said. Again, through his gaze, he indicated to his partner that he would do the hard part.
He lifted Ed by the shoulders using almost all of his strength. The boy's head hung from one side, and a friendly trickle of drool fell from his mouth. Then he started shaking him while Nazz slapped him.
"Wake up!"
He did.
"Ow! What-when-how-where?!"
Ed looked around, trying to rearrange his memory. He wondered why he wasn't in his dirty bed, full of snacks, gravy, bread crumbs and chicken pieces, with some movie from the Mega Monster Slaughter trilogy on TV. Suddenly, a whirlwind of images, one after another, was updating his memory: the events that happened with Eddy, with the others, when he let him escape, him walking through the streets, and then ... he had gone with Double D, to ask him for help.
"Ed, are you okay?" Nazz put a hand on his shoulder. She could tell that even half asleep, he was upset.
"Hey, big guy, where are the other dorks?" Kevin asked.
Mind that Ed had slept... how long? Several hours, more or less. The heavy sleep helped a little to get him to sleep peacefully, and now that he was awake, there was no need to interrupt him while he stretched. He continued with the protocol of every morning: he prepared his little finger with his own saliva and inserted it in his ear. He rubbed very deeply, making sure everything inside was shiny, and withdrew his finger, which now had… debris. Kevin and Nazz turned the other way and held back the urge to vomit. Ed repeated the sequence with the other ear.
"Done. Now tell me, how can I help you?"
"I was telling you if you didn't know where your dorks friends were. Well it doesn't matter, you're going to help us find your friend the traitor, whether you like it or not." And he made him stand up holding him by the ear, much like his mother did whenever Sarah accused him baselessly.
Apparently they were looking for Eddy to punish him for... for stealing from everyone. And he, as a faithful good friend, had given him a hand by letting him escape; because something inside him told him that he was innocent. Everything had happened in less than ten seconds, in which he had been able to see the innocence in his eyes, which, horrified, cried out for help. And after that he had gone looking for Double D to save his friend.
"What were you doing lying on the floor, Ed? Eddy did that to you?"
'Double D'
Ed was still getting pictures. This time it was both heroically going through the woods, through the dense morning darkness, and Double D napping. He only had to watch for five minutes, which ended abruptly, when some force (probably exhaustion) defeated him. And then he woke up in that bush.
"Double D! Where is Double D?" Ed asked.
Kevin and Nazz looked at each other strangely. They recognized that everything had been very confusing in the last hours. At first they had managed to put together a team among all the kids in the cul-de-sac, and then they separated as the night progressed, each one on their own. They didn't know where the others were. They didn't know where they were themselves. They were sure of only one thing: that Eddy was the thief and a son of a bitch.
"What? You don't know either?" Kevin asked suspiciously.
Last night he let Eddy get away was the last time he'd seen him. Since then, he has not heard from him, so getting information out of him — through torture and whipping, as was often done with heroes — would be useless. And Double D... He tried to bring the image of his friend back to his mind, seconds before he lost consciousness. Double D had taken a nap while he watched, and he couldn't remember anymore. Yes, he had fallen asleep and woke up almost in the same place, but that did not explain what had happened with his friend. Perhaps he had moved him to that bush and left him there, to prepare to continue alone. Or maybe some mysterious, evil, otherworldly force kidnapped your noble friend and left him lying there in the open. For someone like Ed, either hypothesis could have occurred.
As Kevin held him by the ear like a mother to his spoiled little one, Nazz could see that Ed had a small swelling on the back of his neck. Curiosity made her feel it a bit. Ed howled in pain and jerked, causing Kevin to let go of him.
"Oh, sorry, Ed. Did I hurt you?" She asked as she quickly withdrew his hand.
"What's the dork got?"
Nazz told him that he had hit himself in some way, much to Ed's surprise since not even he was aware of it. They thought that by finding him, they would find many answers in turn, but they only found more questions. At least that's how it was for Nazz, because Kevin was only interested in getting to Eddy. Ed had already let him slip away, a few hours ago, but it might not be the same now. A little coercion and threats and loyalty should reach its limit, or so he hoped.
"Ed, are you sure you don't know where Double D is?" Nazz asked.
Kevin kept wondering why Ed had a blow to the head. They had found him asleep, or unconscious, lying there drifting. It made perfect sense to think that someone had beaten him up and then hid him in the bushes. But who? And where the hell was Double D? Maybe he was with Eddy, looking for his friend, or running away, or hiding, or neither. Maybe they were caught by the same person who hit Ed, and so he was wondering who? There were many possibilities and only he could answer some of their questions.
"It's obvious he knows. Dorko, for your own good you better cooperate."
"I don't know... I just remember that... me and Double D were..."
The tall man put a finger to his chin and rambled a little. Kevin thought that, like Ed, Double D should also be a loyal friend, and surely he wouldn't spit the information out. Still he had to try to find it. They might threaten Ed to throw Double-D down a gutter he sure wouldn't get out of without a bolt or two loosened. Or simply hold the two of them, to send the older rat a message, demanding that he come forward on his own if he didn't want to see his friends sacrifice themselves for him, assuming he still had friendship codes. When you were furiously indignant, your moral judgment was stretched to unimaginable levels. And just thinking about the possibilities...
"We were in the woods looking for Eddy, and suddenly we fell asleep." And then he fell silent and raised both hands.
"Nothing else?" Kevin asked.
Ed shook his head.
"So you also don't know where's..."
"Nooo!" Kevin dropped to the ground and clutched his head.
"What? What, Kevin?"
The boy pointed forward. A few meters in front of them, an imperfect path, one and a half meters wide, began to be drawn, which moved up to a block ahead and there it disappeared. There was the neighborhood. They were back where they started.
"We will never catch that dork!" The boy dropped to his knees and punched the ground with his fist.
That damn clock kept ticking. Its rhythm penetrated the ears of Lee and May, who could not do anything but wait there, static, where they had been trapped.
Tick, toc, tick, toc...
And the older one had the urge to go get something to throw on it. Why didn't she order Marie to release them before going after that thief?
'Because you told her to be good for something and to go after him, don't you remember, you dope?'
And from where she was standing she could imagine her taunting both of them while chasing him. The wind that came through the broken window on the couch and hit them both... Soon the temperature was going to drop, and along with it her mood, if Marie did not return soon. And to all this, has she caught the stranger?
'Order? She's your sister, not your slave.'
"Lee, I wanna go to the bathroom!" And she remembered she had another sister. Hearing May complain was usually irritating, but it was definitely better than continuing to wander in the monotony of her consciousness, muddled with the ticking of the filthy clock.
'No, she's a spoiled brat.'
"Don't even think about it, May, we just scrubbed the floor," she answered without thinking about it.
It had been cleaned yesterday, but to them the day before meant just about now. Poor May would have to wait for Marie to come back so she could go to the bathroom.
Now, for the love of all the gods, who the hell was that guy who took Eddy? He was clearly taller than him. Lee wondered if it was Ed or Double D. Like on that occasion when Ed suffered an episode of sleepwalking and invaded everyone's houses, destroying their food and stealing some things, like their ship in a bottle, maybe this time the same thing had happened, but with Eddy. That fool could have gotten out of control and they had no choice but to intervene for him, rescuing him from the trouble he got into. Looking at it that way, one of the Eds had to be the "masked one."
"May, don't you think that...?"
Very familiar voices were heard through the broken window. Someone on the other side slammed the door a few times, sending what few remaining glass it had to shoot all over the place. That's just what they needed. More trouble.
Sarah broke into the house, kicking the door to the floor. She was carrying a loaded ketchup container with which she threatened to shoot. Jonny came in behind her, holding a similar container but of mayonnaise; the shaking tip of which reflected his terror. Apparently, he was the only one who detected an unpleasant smell in the environment. They were both panting, as if they had run a marathon.
"Where is he?!" The youngest asked hysterically as she shielded her weapon. "Where's Jimmy?!"
Once again, the Kanker sisters received another unexpected visit. They looked at each other, understanding absolutely nothing.
"What the hell are you talking about? Can't you see we're glued to the ground?" Lee snapped, surprised.
Sarah approached her, closing the distance between her weapon and her upturned nose, just enough so that she wouldn't slap it away. The little girl was shaking with rage.
"Don't play dumb. I know Jimmy was kidnapped early this morning. You are the only ones who'd do it. If you don't give him to me, I'll-"
"What?! What are you going to do?!" Lee answered defiantly.
"But we didn't even leave..." May interrupted, but Sarah silenced her. Jonny stayed in line behind Sarah, covering her. Seeing that they couldn't move, he managed to calm down a bit. It was so easy to threaten someone when they were attached to the floor.
"Jonny! Check the whole trailer, I'll keep an eye on them!" she ordered him. She still wasn't sure if they were really immobilized or if it was just a trap.
"Alright. You go upstairs, Plank, I'll look in the kitchen." And he threw his friend upstairs. It landed on the other end. Sarah just rolled her eyes.
As he approached the kitchen door, Jonny felt the foul smell intensify. Wondering the reason for that scent, he stepped inside.
As he had imagined, it was definitely a disaster. The window was also broken. The refrigerator was open. The table and chairs on the floor. The cookie jar was thrown away, almost empty: they were all scattered all over the floor, and the ants were already doing their thing. And that unpleasant smell invaded most of the kitchen. It was not very difficult to find the origin.
"And what the hell would we want that momma's boy for?" Lee protested.
"Yeah! Leave us alone! Just look at us! Don't you think we've had enough?"
"Next even the rain's going to be our fault too!"
Sarah didn't believe any of their words. She well knew that those snakes loved to use anyone for their own amusement.
"He's not here!" The boy reported.
"Plank's been calling you, it looks like he did find something," Sarah told him. There's likely something relevant upstairs, and somehow Jonny had to be handled. The boy went upstairs and she headed back to the Kankers. "Do you think I'm stupid? I know you have hidden him somewhere. You got tired of my brother and his stupid friends and that's why you decided to come for us, right?!"
"I swear, if I were free I would give what you… deserved!" Lee was struggling against her own trap, and for a moment she had the feeling that she was going to slip away.
She was trying to aim at both of them simultaneously. May covered her hair every time the container was pointed at her. She and her sisters hated when someone touched their hair for something other than a caress.
What strange relationships those three had... Ed, Double D, Eddy. And these sisters... Lee, May, and...
"Wait! Where's the other one?" She asked as she stopped aiming them down to go back to every corner of the room. She assumed that they had been stuck to the floor. What kind of trap could be done that way? None as far as she knew. Where did she hide?
'You sure are a fool, Sarah.'
"You mean Marie?" May replied, with a small voice. "She's..."
"Zip it!" Lee exclaimed.
Sarah noticed immediately what that might entail. She raced up the stairs, three at a time. Lee took the opportunity to tell May what was going on.
She found Jonny in the bedroom. He crawled under the Kanker bed. When he heard her arrive, he stuck his bald head out, shoving several pairs of shoes out.
"Be careful, I think Marie is around here," she warned, pointing to all corners.
"Don't worry, Plank has us covered. He'll be done with her in seconds." Jonny pointed to his faithful companion, who stood at the foot of the bedroom door, wearing a camouflage helmet and a small cardboard sword. Sarah covered her face with her hand, fighting the urge to hit him and throw him out the window. She was grateful that at least someone was helping her in her search, but this was a difficult situation and she had no time for bullshit.
They went through the entire room several times, turned all the furniture, then went through the bathroom, and there was no place to look. Upstairs had been more rowdy than the kitchen, and those Kankers would go crazy as soon as they see that mess they'd made. They returned to the living room, with the sisters, with no choice but to agree. Jimmy was not at home, they were glued to the floor. They definitely had nothing to do with it.
"Let's go guys, there's nothing here for us," said the younger one in frustration. They no longer had anything to do there.
"Hold it! Ain't you gonna set us free?" Lee protested.
"And why would we do it?"
"I have information, of Eddy. You guys are looking for him, right?" said the older one.
That was not entirely true. They were now looking for Jimmy, and they planned to find him and then follow Eddy, however, they still didn't quite rule out the fact that the latter had something to do with it.
Although that didn't make much sense to them; it was believed that they would side with the Eds every time the cul-de-sac kids chased them, like that last time... So why would they turn Eddy over? Unless they had somehow fought… Eddy hated them, so that was possible. The two of them thought about it for a few seconds, and concluded that they would lose nothing if they listened to what they had to say. In "exchange" for their freedom.
"We captured Eddy at noon today because we thought he had stolen from us too. We tied him up and questioned him and then-" Lee began.
"A masked guy came in to play hero and glued us on the floor with a gun that shot our rubber cement. He got us all but not Marie," May continued.
Jonny looked down at the substance. It was a kind of slimy material that became hard when it hit the floor. There was no smell down there.
"And then that thief took Eddy... and Marie went after them. And that's it."
Sarah listened carefully to their words. Those witches didn't give them any guarantees. Their word was worth what that potato lying there on the floor. Apparently there was someone else; someone dressed as a thief other than Eddy. It may well be true, but that didn't prove his innocence. Did that erase the fact that he had been at her house, dressed in black, trying to get something? Maybe that was his accomplice. But after all, that was already Kevin and Nazz's business. What they were interested in now was finding Jimmy.
"Nice story, but none of that helps me. Let's go," she declared, and walked out the door she'd broken down.
"Hey! Baldy, free us!"
Johnny stopped short, and turned to see them.
"Please!" May begged him. "Hot water melts the glue, and I want to go to the bathroom. I can't take it anymore!"
Jonny froze in place, watching the sisters. The image was already very humiliating: they had received a little of their own medicine. Indecisive, he went again to his companion, good ol' Plank.
"Yeah. You're right, buddy." Jonny turned to them, who were looking at him expectantly. Sarah just watched from the outside. "Plank and I think you guys are merciless stinky witches who love to bully others and-"
"Yeah, yeah, thanks for the compliments. Now can you set us free or what?" Lee demanded impatiently.
"But he also says that in life you have to have a word." And he went to the kitchen for some water.
"Seriously?" Sarah said, shocked. She couldn't believe they were wasting their time on these sisters. May "jumped" with joy.
"Now that's a real man," Lee commented admiringly.
The immature and lunatic Jonny, who was expected nothing more than tricks with his imaginary friend, was finally showing signs of good sense, and in a more demanding sense, maturity, and the two girls were witnesses of this. Sarah was still too young to understand - and even more, to appreciate - all that about the principles, so her insipid personality only limited her to throw a tantrum at the boy demanding that he finish with heroism and that they get out of there at once.
As expected, Jonny freed the Kankers, Lee went to bookshelf to grab a book and throw it at that crappy clock, and May was gone in a flash, an instant before the door above was heard slam shut with a "bang". And Jonny knew he had done the right thing.
Outside again, the two kids went back into the forest. Jonny with his head held high, proud. Sarah was a bit relieved to have someone help her, but it was going to take more than that to get any other expression out of her than her eternal face of bitterness. If Jimmy was not found in the forest, it was very likely that there would have been no kidnapping and that he would simply have lost himself there, deciding to return home to await the others. It was just a possibility, of course. It was not a concrete fact, as it was that roar that escaped from the stomach of both.
"I think I'm hungry... are you hungry, Plank?"
That was followed by another like it, but from the girl.
"Damn!" She exclaimed. But she has to admit, they hadn't eaten anything in hours. Sarah said it was nothing.
"We both heard it, Sarah. You're not hungry?"
"Well..." Angry, she had to say yes.
"Luckily we have something here." The boy produced a putrid cube of stale cheese, more green than yellow, which gave off its sweet aroma the moment it was released. Sarah covered her nose and dropped to the floor. She coughed a little, struggling to get some fresh air.
"Ewwww! Oh my God, Jonny! Where did you get that gross thing?"
"I found it in the Kankers' kitchen."
"Well, get it away from m- What?"
Jonny told her how he had found it: in one of the corners formed by the refrigerator and the wall, next to some cookies, and as by nature, the ants kept away from that putrid cheese. It was as if that bite contrasted with the rest of the kitchen, even if this was the Kankers' kitchen. At the time, he didn't know what that entailed, but for some reason he decided to take it anyway.
And Sarah knew instantly what that meant. But of course, who in the cul-de-sac usually forgets their sandwiches in their pockets, especially stale cheeses? This is how all the threads were tied simultaneously, in a succession of conclusions. The person who freed Eddy was his accomplice, and that same person had an expired cheese in his pocket, which he dropped at the crime scene.
Gathering all the energy that she harbored somewhere in her soul, the girl screamed the name of her older brother with all possible anger, shaking the trees of almost half the forest. Jonny had to cover his ears to cope with the booming voice. Some birds that had rested on the branches of those trees immediately left the place.
They all heard the wild roar of the girl. Ed and Eddy, who were running away from the angry Kevin. Even Double D heard her, minutes after leaving his house. It was time to use his next card.