It had been years since Lorelai had to concern herself with school schedules. She'd forgotten how packed May and June were with graduations, award ceremonies, and sports banquets. The Stars Hollow Nursery School tried hard to avoid conflicts with older siblings by putting on their end-of-the-year program in early May, even though they wouldn't say goodbye to their students for another month.
On the night of the program, Rory was excited, while Jess maintained his aura of cool indifference to anything that didn't have a firetruck involved. She hopped up the steps to the church's front door in her new twirlable dress, electrified by the fact that they were entering the building after dinnertime instead of just after breakfast. Her whole world had been turned on its head.
"Easy there," Lorelai warned, putting a protective hand on her daughter's back. "I don't want to have to put a bandage on your knee before your big on-stage debut."
"No, Mommy!" Rory protested, shaking off Lorelai's hand. "I can do it!"
"I know you can," Lorelai said, but she stayed close behind Rory anyway.
"We've got to take the kids down to their classroom," Liz told Luke and her dad. "Do you guys want to go save us some seats?"
When they got downstairs, they found the three-year-old classroom bursting with barely controlled enthusiasm.
"Hello, Jess! Hello, Rory!" Miss Lulu said, checking their names off her list. "Go take your seats, and as soon as everyone else arrives, we'll practice our song again."
Lorelai looked over the animated preschoolers, their shrill voices rising to fill the room. "Would you like me to stay, to give you a hand?" she offered.
Miss Lulu gave her a kind, tolerant smile. "Thanks, but I've got it," she said. "We'll see you after the program."
Although Lulu Bell was young, petite, and pleasant, she ruled the three-year-olds with an equitable firmness and was universally adored. She taught nursery school during the day and continued to take classes for her teaching degree at night. Lorelai wasn't the only parent hoping that Miss Lulu would someday be teaching their children at the elementary school level.
Back up in the church, Liz stopped so suddenly that Lorelai almost ran into her. "Lorelai, holy cow! Isn't that your parents?"
Lorelai regained her balance and looked over Liz's shoulder. "Yes, it is," she said somberly.
"What are they doing here?"
"I invited them."
"You did what?"
Lorelai sighed. "They've respected my boundaries and haven't pushed about seeing us more. I thought that maybe tonight would provide a less invasive way to get together." She sighed again. "Of course, I didn't really think that they'd come."
Liz raised her eyebrows. "The Spanish Inquisition surprises you again."
"When will I ever learn that lesson?" With a grim smile, Lorelai walked over to greet her parents. "Mom! Dad! Rory's going to be so happy to see you."
"Hello, Lorelai. Liz." Richard Gilmore nodded at his daughter and her friend. "This church is certainly…rustic."
"If by 'rustic' you mean old, then yes, it certainly is," Liz said with a smile.
"It does have its charms, I suppose," Emily observed.
"I don't think anyone cares about charm, as long as it's useful." Lorelai waved towards one of the pews. "We're sitting up there. Would you like to join us?"
"Well, look who's here!" Will stood up to greet the Gilmores when they approached the end of the pew. "What a nice surprise!" As everyone settled into their spots, he gave Lorelai a look that plainly asked if she was okay with them being here. She smiled and shrugged, grateful as always for his fatherly concern.
Emily found herself next to Luke. "No Rachel?" she asked him.
"Not tonight. She's battling a deadline this week."
"What a shame. I'm sure she's going to miss an evening of scintillating entertainment."
"She's watched the kids practice at home for a couple of weeks. I think she knows exactly what she's missing," Luke said dryly.
Liz had been scanning the entrance, and now she jumped up and ran back to the big double doors. She returned beaming, pulling Oliver along with her. She made quick introductions as they sat down on the end of the pew.
Just as the lights dimmed and gentle organ music began to play, Mia appeared in the aisle. Normally she was a woman well in control of her emotions, but her head reared back in shock as she beheld the Gilmores sitting there.
"Mia! Hi!" Lorelai said, giving her an apologetic look.
"Goodness! A full house," she said, recovering quickly.
Everyone scooted over to make room for her, and Lorelai found herself wedged between her father and Oliver.
"Sorry it didn't work out with Ben," Oliver said quietly, bending his head her way. She glanced at him and saw that he was completely sincere. Apparently, Ben hadn't told him the truth about what had happened.
"No hard feelings on my end," she told him, smiling gamely. "We're all still friends, as far as I'm concerned."
"Ben's an idiot," Oliver told her.
No, I'm the idiot, Lorelai berated herself. In so many different ways.
The music stopped and the Reverend Skinner took his place at the front of the church. "Welcome! We're so happy that you could join us here in celebration tonight." He took a moment to smile at the families gathered in the pews. "One of the things that our teachers do so well is to help the children name and understand their emotions. As I'm sure you see demonstrated every day, they ping from elation to anger to sadness in a matter of minutes. Along with learning their letters and numbers, we hope that their time in our classrooms helps them to develop some insights into why they feel the way they do and give them the words they need to explain how they're feeling." He smiled again, apologetically this time. "As adults, however, we know that's easier said than done, so maybe all of us could use a few days back in nursery school, to help us remember to use words instead of actions when we're distraught." He looked over those assembled again. "Tonight, I feel a lot of emotions. I'm excited to see all of you. I'm grateful that you have allowed us to care for your precious children. And I'm happy for you to have this chance to see how much your boys and girls have developed during the course of a year." He motioned for a woman to join him up front. "At this time, I'd like to turn the program over to our nursery school director, Beverly Adams."
Lorelai had passed the bubbling blonde woman in the basement hallways many times, but she hadn't realized she was the director.
"We've had a great year!" Beverly proclaimed. She clicked on an overhead projector and numbers filled the screen hanging in front of the altar. "We welcomed twelve new students to our classes and we were able to hire another teacher's aide. We have even bigger plans for next year. We're looking at the possibility of adding an afternoon class, or at the very least, some sort of before school/afterschool care for elementary age kids. If any of you are interested, please stop by to see me. We'd like to gauge the community's interest in such a venture." She gestured with her hands and the children began to file down the aisles, to sit in the front pews reserved for them. "Here are the real heroes of our preschool, the teachers! Miss Lulu Bell with the three-year-olds, Josh Walters with the fours, and Bridget Sanders with our afternoon fours. Please give them a hand!"
After an enthusiastic round of applause, Beverly then turned on a slide projector, and someone standing at the side of the sanctuary dimmed the lights. "We know that not all of you are able to go along on field trips and can't always stop by to see what the kids are up to on a regular basis. So here's the favorite part of my job, which is tagging along on the trips or sticking my head in the classrooms and snapping pictures of everyday life at nursery school. If you ever wonder why your children come home dirty or tuckered out, here's why!"
The presentation immediately generated oohs and awws and chuckles. The children squealed and pointed at the screen as they recognized themselves and their buddies.
"Who's that young lady?" Richard asked Lorelai, as a slide of Rory blissfully squeezing the daylights out of a tiny Korean girl filled the screen.
"That's Lane Kim," Lorelai whispered back. "Rory adores her! Sometimes I think it's because she believes Lane is just a big doll who can walk and talk. They've become fast friends."
Richard smiled and chuckled quietly.
A few minutes later, a slide showed Rory and Jess sharing a picture book, their dark heads nestled together companionably.
"Just like at home," Oliver commented. "Inseparable."
"Born readers," Richard proudly stated.
After the year in pictures review, the three-year-olds were led to the front of the sanctuary and put into a line. As Lulu read "The Very Hungry Caterpillar," the kids followed along with different hand motions. Jess stuck his hands in his pockets and seemed uninterested, until Rory inched down the line to stand next to him. She nudged him in the ribs, and he then began to flutter his hands in a vaguely butterfly sort of way, too.
Liz couldn't stop giggling. "Again, just like at home."
"Little boss lady there," Lorelai agreed.
Next, they sang – practically shouted – a song about shapes. This time, everyone was very enthused about making their hands into circles or triangles or hearts.
"That's the one they've been practicing forever," Luke said to Mrs. Gilmore.
"Very good, class!" Lulu told her charges, helping them return to their seats amongst fervent applause.
The other two classes took their turns up front, singing and performing small skits. At the end, all three classes clustered at the front of the church to sing "This Little Light of Mine," complete with more hand gestures. The song was obviously a favorite, as each child took pleasure in belting it out. They favored volume over hitting the correct notes, which made for an interesting interpretation of the song.
Afterwards, everyone went downstairs to see the classrooms and to admire the talented artwork taped to the walls. The more Lorelai introduced her parents, the easier it got for her to accept their presence in her town.
When it was time to leave, Richard paused on the church steps outside. "As I recall, the proper ending for a night like this is ice cream. Is there somewhere we can go and get some close by? My treat, Will, to thank you for the wonderful meal at your house."
"Weston's has a small selection of ice cream, and they also have a good choice of baked goods. It's just on the opposite side of the square," Will said, pointing.
"Thanks, Dad," Lorelai said. "That will be the perfect nightcap for the kiddos."
"Unfortunately, I need to get back to the inn," Mia said. She hugged the children quickly and waved at everyone else. "Thanks for the offer. It was wonderful to see you both again," she said to the Gilmores, and then walked away in relief.
"Weston's?" Richard looked intrigued. "That's where the pie came from, correct?"
"It did," Luke confirmed. "They might not have lemon meringue tonight, though. I don't have their daily specials memorized, the way some people do."
"Today's butterscotch pie and cinnamon rolls," Lorelai said immediately.
Luke caught Richard's eye. "As I said, certain people have the menu memorized."
"I've no doubt," he said, smiling fondly at his daughter.
"You all go on ahead, and save us a seat," Will suggested. He took Jess's hand. "Jess and I have a small errand to run, but we'll be right there."
"Dad?" Liz looked confused.
"No big deal." Will began to turn Jess around and they started off in the direction of the hardware store. "We'll be there before you can even miss us! And get me a cinnamon roll if they still have some. If not, I want a dish of the cookie dough ice cream."
They crossed the square and went inside to place their orders. It was such a nice evening, they decided to find seats outside. They were just pushing two small tables together when Will and Jess returned.
Jess walked up to Liz and shoved a big bouquet of daffodils and tulips into her arms. "For Mom!" he proudly declared.
"Oh, my goodness! Jess! What's this for?" Liz looked astonished. She looked at Will. "Dad?"
Will hung his head for a moment. "I'm proud of you, Lizzie. I'm proud of the woman you are and the mom you've become." He paused, long enough to take a considered breath. "I was never shy about telling you what I thought you were doing wrong. It seems only fair that I let you know when I think you're doing everything right, too."
"Aww…Dad!" Liz put a hand against her cheek, overcome with feeling. She hugged Jess, then came over to throw her arms around her dad. "Thank you," she said, the flowers looking a little bit worse for wear after being smashed against Will's back. "This means an awful lot," she told him.
"You're very welcome," Will told her, hugging her tightly. He looked over her shoulder at Lorelai and gave her a small nod, thankful that she had recently clued him in about his daughter's feelings.
Rory had quickly gobbled down the two iced sugar cookies she'd been permitted, and now she was circling the table, trying to discern what everyone else was eating. "What you got?" she asked Richard, staring at the shiny footed bowl he had before him.
"It's called a tin roof sundae." He tilted the bowl her way, so she could see. "Do you want to try some?"
Rory nodded and immediately allowed herself to be lifted up onto Richard's lap. He helped her get a bite of the chocolate ice cream and caramel sauce. "What's that?" she wanted to know, pointing at the sauce.
"Caramel," he told her, watching as she tried it out. "Do you like it?"
She nodded again and opened her mouth for another bite.
"Watch out Dad, she'll finish that off for you," Lorelai warned him, taking a big bite of her own hot fudge sundae.
"What you got?" Rory asked Emily, trying to see into her cup.
"Raspberry sorbet. Do you want to try it?"
"Yes! It's pink!" Rory slid off of Richard's knees and eagerly went over to join Emily, who absolutely beamed as she lifted the little girl onto her lap.
But the first bite wasn't a hit. Rory shuddered and hit her fingers against her mouth, making everyone laugh. "I bet that tasted sour, after the sweet caramel sauce," Emily guessed.
"His is better," Rory agreed, and abandoned Emily for the tin roof.
As soon as the treats were finished, it was time to head for their respective homes.
"Thank you, Lorelai, for suggesting this." Richard put his hand on her shoulder, giving it a squeeze. "This has been a most delightful evening."
"I'm glad you could come," Lorelai said, and to her surprise, discovered that she meant the words sincerely.
"It was nice to meet you," Oliver said. "And thanks so much for the ice cream."
Emily, no longer feeling like such an outsider, scooped Rory up in her arms to hug her. "Rory, I loved seeing you tonight. You did so well up on stage!"
"OK, Em'ly Lady." Rory patted her grandmother's cheeks, still not quite managing a gentle touch. "Bye-bye. Be good!"
Everyone was laughing as they parted ways.
As they walked back to the Danes home, Liz sidled up next to Lorelai and bumped her shoulder into hers. "Not a bad night, huh?"
"Not bad at all," Lorelai admitted. "Didn't need to use my Spanish once."
Three weeks later, Lorelai looked at the heaping pie plate on her counter. She'd borrowed the serving dish from the inn's kitchen, but the culinary creation threatening to fall off the edges of the plate was all her own. Tonight they were celebrating Luke's last day of exams. The celebration was a surprise, and, as an even bigger surprise, they all had agreed to make something for dinner on their own, so that for once, Luke didn't have to cook.
Lorelai's choice was 7-Layer Taco Dip. It required no cooking, only a small amount of chopping, and it looked remarkably tasty when she got done. She was justifiably proud of herself. She'd almost left off the chopped green pepper, not being a fan of most green vegetables, but then she remembered she was making this for Luke and added them in anyway.
Mia poked her head in the potting shed's door. "Ready to go?"
"Yeah, just gotta find a way to transport this."
"That looks yummy." Mia came over to admire the appetizer. "And here you say you can't cook!"
"I didn't cook. I mixed things together, spread them on the plate, and added cheese. All well within my wheelhouse."
"Mia!" Rory suddenly realized they had company. She came bounding over and hugged Mia's knees.
"Hello, sweetheart. Ready to go to Jess's house?"
Rory nodded eagerly, but then pointed at Lorelai. "Mommy made food!" She sounded amazed.
"Hey, I've fed you before," Lorelai grumbled. "I'm very good at putting things in the toaster."
Mia chuckled while helping Lorelai ease the platter of dip into a Tupperware container. They picked up everything else needed for the party and loaded it all into Mia's car. Lorelai grabbed the extra bags of chips and Rory's car seat, and soon they were on their way.
Everyone was proud to display their cooking talents when they got there. Mia had prepared a beautiful bowl of fruit salad. Liz was stirring a pot full of sloppy joe. Will, with a flourish, brought forth a big pan of brownies.
"From scratch," he bragged. "Not from a box."
"Who knew we could do this?" Lorelai said. "We're amazing!"
They arranged the food on the buffet and then went out front to decorate. Liz had a long banner that spelled out "congratulations" and about a dozen helium-filled balloons.
"This is going to embarrass him," Mia warned, helping to hold the banner across the porch while the girls taped it in place.
"That's kinda the point," Liz chuckled.
"We do embarrassment just as well as we cook," Lorelai agreed.
They didn't expect Luke to pull up right at that moment. He was earlier than they thought he would be. The last few pieces of tape were placed hurriedly.
Lorelai grabbed the kids. "You remember what to do, right?" They both nodded seriously.
Luke got out of his car, already scowling at them. "What's this?" he asked, sounding cranky. But Lorelai thought he was secretly pleased, behind the scowl.
"Surprise!" they all shouted. The kids shouted it over and over again.
"What is this?" he asked again, standing with his hands on his hips.
Liz ran over and threw her arms around him. "We're proud of you, Big Bro!" She gave air smooches to his cheeks. "You made it through a whole semester of school."
"Not that big of a deal," he grumbled. But then he looked around and couldn't hide a smile.
"How'd it go?" Will asked eagerly. He'd joined Liz and Luke on the sidewalk, and now he placed a hand on Luke's shoulder.
He shrugged. "OK, I think."
"That's what you said every other night," Will complained. "What does OK mean?"
"It was OK. You know. No problems. I studied, it went OK."
Will sighed and rolled his eyes.
"Well, come on in, then," Lorelai suggested. She held open the front door for everyone.
Inside, Luke immediately saw the feast spread out. "What's this about?"
"We cooked," Liz told him.
"So you don't have to," Will added.
Rory bounced up to him and grabbed his hand in excitement. "Mommy made food!"
"Yes, apparently that is the most amazing thing ever," Lorelai deadpanned.
"You cooked?" Luke asked her doubtfully.
She pointed at the taco dip.
He stared at it. "You made this?"
"Yes, I made this."
He turned his gaze her way. "Are you sure Tanner didn't make this for you?" he questioned, a little snidely.
"No, Tanner did not make this for me." Occasionally, Liz teased her about the inn's sous chef, but this was the first time that Lorelai realized she'd also mentioned him to her family. "Here, try some." She opened one of the chip bags, took out a chip, and scooped up some of the dip on it. A slice of black olive fell off, and she almost left it, but then she remembered Luke would happily eat black olives, so she put it back on. She aimed the loaded chip at his mouth.
He took it away from her, smelled it distrustfully, then popped it in his mouth. "Not bad," he said, crunching. He loaded up another chip, and Lorelai wiggled her shoulders with pride.
"Where's Rachel?" Mia asked.
"Said she had something more to do before she headed over. She'll be here," Luke said. "Of course, that was before I knew there was a – a thing going on here."
"It's a party, Luke. It's OK to say it," Lorelai told him.
They chatted and laughed together for about fifteen minutes, but when the kids began whining about being hungry, they decided to go ahead get started on the meal.
It was another fifteen or twenty minutes before Rachel showed up. "Sorry," she said, sounding as cranky as Luke usually did. "I got stuck in a never-ending meeting." She plunked a box of carry-out chicken on the table. "And I didn't have time to fix anything."
"Not a problem," Will said, trying to smooth things over. "You know I love fried chicken." He quickly opened the box and snatched a thigh to put on his plate.
Rachel sat down at the empty place next to Luke. With his mouth full, he gave her a one-armed hug. They all passed the dishes to her, and as she ate, her mood seemed to lift.
As always, the conversation flowed around the table. Rory even had stories she wanted to tell from nursery school. They were mostly incomprehensible, but they listened to her respectfully.
Next, Will brought over his brownies and proudly cut them up into huge portions.
Meanwhile, privately, Mia tried to get Luke to talk about school. Since she used more finesse than Will had, little by little she was able to draw out more details from him.
"I had a 4.0 before finals," Lorelai thought she heard Luke say.
"You what?!" she interrupted, stunned by what she'd heard.
Luke ducked his head, not intending for that to be common knowledge.
"You have a 4.0?" she asked again. "Luke, that's fantastic!"
He shrugged, clamming up now that everyone was listening.
"Luke, I had no idea," his dad said. "Why didn't you let us know?"
"No reason to. Not a big deal," he grumbled.
"No wonder you want to take more classes," Mia happily observed. "I think you've found your calling."
"You're taking more classes?" Liz asked.
"That's wonderful!" Will chimed in.
"Good for you!" Lorelai exclaimed, clapping her hands.
"What?" Rachel said, a second later, in a deadly, cold voice.
All other conversation stopped.
Luke looked down at his plate. "My advisor contacted me today and wanted me to stop by. He urged me to get signed up for more classes. He was so…" Luke glanced over at Rachel and stopped talking when he saw the displeasure on her face. "He was appalled that I hadn't already committed to continuing. So I did it. I'm signed up for two over the summer and another full load in the fall." He gave her a firmer look. "This all just happened, OK? He was so gung-ho about my grades that I guess I let him talk me into it. I'm aware that it's something we should discuss."
It took several long seconds before she replied. "Yes. We should." She speared her piece of brownie angrily.
After that, it was hard to get back to light-hearted table-talk, although Will and Mia, Lorelai and Liz all tried. And failed.
Eventually Will stood up. "Tell you what, since this is your night, Luke, why don't you and Rachel get out of here, go for a walk or something? I'm sure the rest of the crew will be happy to do clean-up."
Rachel stood up, too. "Unfortunately, I've got to get back to the paper."
"Rachel," Luke began, also getting up.
"No, I've got to go. That meeting messed with my darkroom time. I'm on deadline." She moved to pick up her purse and headed towards the front door.
An unhappy Luke followed her.
The other four gave each other significant looks, then put their heads down and did the best clean-up job possible. By the time an obviously pissed-off Luke returned, most of it was done.
Mia hung up a dishcloth and came over to him, insisting on a hug. "I've got to get going too, I'm afraid. Nothing as exciting as a newspaper deadline, though. I promised Tobin I'd be there tonight when he comes on duty, so we could go over a few things."
"Thanks for being here," Luke mumbled.
"I'm so proud of you, Luke." She smiled as she lightly touched his face. "I'm so proud to see the progress you've made in the past few months."
After Mia left, they went into the living room and tried to resume one of their normal nights, but a definite cloud hung over them, colored by Luke's mood.
"All right, it's time to fully induct Lorelai into this family." Liz went over to the front hall closet. On tiptoe, she pulled a box down from the top shelf. She turned and presented it to the room at large.
"No," Will said firmly.
"Hell no," Luke added, forgetting that the kids were within hearing range.
"It's the only solution," Liz argued.
Lorelai walked over to the table, where Liz was placing the box. She looked at the worn container curiously. All four corners were held together with masking tape. The box looked as though it had been kicked, sat upon, and had possibly survived an arson attempt. A large rubber band held the lid on. Lorelai read the few words visible on the top. "Match the Bunnies. A game for –" She stopped reading abruptly and looked up at Liz, then back over at the guys sitting across the room. "For ages three and up?" Again, she searched Liz's face. "Are you serious about this?"
"Oh, am I. This is the most serious thing the Danes family ever does."
"Match the Bunnies?" Lorelai tapped the lid in disbelief.
No longer reluctant, Will joined them at the table. "We play it a little differently."
"This is true," Liz agreed. "We play it like the Allies storming Normandy." She looked over at her brother. "Luke, come on."
"Isn't this supposed to be my night? My celebration? I say no."
"Come on, you're the best at it!"
"No."
"You just don't want me kicking your butt when I take the moo-cows away from you."
"Moo-cows?" Lorelai repeated incredulously. She still thought it all had to be a joke.
"I'll go put a movie in for the kids," Will said, suddenly fired up. "And those moo-cows are mine."
"In your dreams, old man," Luke said, still sounding indifferent, but he approached the table anyway.
Liz winked at Lorelai as she took the rubber band off the lid. "Moo-cows are the big draw."
"Well, sure. Of course," Lorelai said, giving up. She sat down at the table.
"Here's how this works." Will sat down too, and helped Liz pull the pieces out of the box. "There are six sets of matching cards. Bunnies, chickies, puppies, kitties, duckies, and moo-cows."
"OK," Lorelai said, giggling.
"And the point is, you want to get a full set before anyone else does," Luke explained, shuffling the cards.
"So we deal them out, and then you have to decide which set you want to go for," Will continued.
"You calmly ask the other players for what you want. Like, 'two chickies,'" Liz said. She put a desk bell in the middle of the table. "When you get a full set, you ring the bell. And you need to do it before the time runs out." She placed a game-sized plastic hourglass on the table as well.
"Each set is worth so many points." Luke showed her a card, with a bunny and the number four on it. "Whoever gets to 30 points first wins the game."
Lorelai nodded. It all seemed straight-forward enough.
"Ready?" Will asked, rubbing his hands together.
"Ready," she agreed.
Luke dealt, then they all took a moment to look at their hands and get them in order. Luke leaned forward and rang the bell, signaling the start of the trading.
Without warning, the Allies stormed the beach.
"Three duckies! Three duckies! Three duckies!" Will screamed, standing up.
"Two moo-cows! Two moo-cows!" Liz yelled, leaning forward.
"Two bunnies, two bunnies, two bunnies," Luke growled.
Lorelai's mouth dropped open as she watched these people she knew and loved morph into moo-cow monsters.
"Lorelai, come on!" Liz urged her.
"Trade!" Luke demanded, holding two cards out to her.
"Um…OK." She held out her cards. He threw his to her, then snatched the ones out of her hands.
"Two bunnies!" He immediately shouted, the cards he'd traded for not helping him.
Rory and Jess abandoned Lady and the Tramp and came over to see what was going on. They began shouting too, and hopping around the table, adding to the bedlam.
Will yelled and slammed down his six matching duckies. He rang the bell multiple times.
"Dang." Liz recorded his points on a raggedy notepad she pulled from the box. "OK, let's go again." She grabbed the cards and started to shuffle.
"You'll get the hang of it," Will told Lorelai, patting her hand. "Just speak up! Don't be shy!"
"You've got to trade faster," Luke advised her.
The second round was similar to the first. As was the third. And fourth. And fifth.
On the sixth go-round, there came a time when Will was standing up, shouting hoarsely, "Three moo-cows! Three moo-cows!" over and over again. To shut him up, Lorelai handed him the three moo-cows she'd been hoarding.
"Yes!" Will yelled triumphantly. But then he looked at his cards and sat down. "Oh. I don't need these. I meant bunnies." He stood up again. "Three bunnies! Three bunnies!" he yelled, waving the cards around.
And Lorelai lost it. Completely lost it. She laughed so hard she went limp. She slid down in her chair, and then, when the debilitating laughter wouldn't stop, she slid out of the chair completely, onto the floor, where she writhed and laughed, praying she didn't wet her pants. The kids ran to her and plopped down on top of her, which made her laugh even harder.
"Get up here." Luke lifted the kids off of her and then reached down and grabbed her hands, pulling her upright. "You've got to keep trading or we can't keep on playing."
"This is playing?" she protested, but she sat down and took her cards back up. Eventually she just started yelling out random numbers and trading with anyone who asked for anything.
"Done," Luke announced, with no fanfare. Calmly, he leaned forward and hit the bell.
"What do you mean – oh." Liz added the points to his total. "Yeah, that gives Luke 32. He wins." She stuck her tongue out at him. "As usual."
"Let's go again," Will said, reaching for the cards.
"Are you kidding?" Lorelai objected. "You want to do that again?"
"Gotta regain my crown," Will said shortly, slapping the cards around.
"One more game," Lorelai said. "Then I've got to get Rory home."
Will put the last card in front of Luke, then pointed at him. "Prepare to lose, sucker!"
"Prepare to lose, sucker!" Rory shouted, jumping up and down, feeding off the excitement of the adults.
"Thanks for that," Lorelai said, glaring at Will.
"Two duckies," he replied clearly.
"I'm taking the girls home tonight," Will said, jiggling the keys to his pickup truck.
Liz looked up from where she was sprawled out on the couch. "Are you sure, Dad?"
"You bet. You just relax. Get Jess ready for bed."
"I'll go get the car seat in the truck," Luke offered. "I think Mia left it on the front porch."
Will picked up a compliant, tuckered-out Rory. Lorelai followed with everything else. She placed the backpack and the empty Tupperware in the bed of the pickup, while Will waited for Luke to finish up with the seat installation.
"That's got it." Luke turned to his dad, his arms outstretched to take Rory from him.
Will raised his eyebrows. "A little greedy, aren't you?"
"What are you talking about?"
"You just get out of the way. I've got Rory," Will advised him.
Luke rolled his eyes but did as he was told.
While they were waiting for Will to buckle Rory into place, Lorelai bumped her arm against Luke's. "Congrats again, Luke. You did great."
He shrugged, still downplaying his success. "I'd still be waiting for inspiration to strike if it wasn't for you."
"Ooh, does that mean I'm your muse? 'Cause I've always wanted to be a muse!"
Another eyeroll. "Right, because culinary students definitely need a muse."
She nodded vigorously. "I'm glad you agree. I can be your dessert muse. I think I'd be good at it."
Will turned to help Lorelai up into the truck, and even though she could have hopped in without any trouble, she gracefully put her hand into his. She waved goodbye to Luke as she waited for Will to take his place.
The old truck started the well-worn route to the inn. Rory leaned her tired head against Will but frowned as he kept having to move his arm as he drove. She gave up and settled against her mother instead.
Lorelai put her arm around Rory, cuddling her against her. "I had the best time tonight."
"I'm glad you had fun."
"It was more than fun, Will. It was the best time I've ever had."
"Right," he said, grinning, used to Lorelai's exaggerations.
"I'm serious here. That was the best party, best night, best everything," Lorelai insisted. "I'd heard about game nights, about how families played games together. I thought it was some sort of myth. You know, some sort of old-timey legend that only existed in movies or hokey TV shows. I didn't know it was true."
Will glanced over. "Your family never played games?"
"Us? Are you kidding? Never." Lorelai stopped and thought it over. "Well, I guess Mom did shanghai me into being a fourth at a bridge table a time or two, when one of her set had to call off. But I don't think that counts, do you?"
"No," Will said somberly, "it doesn't." He stared down the road and sighed. "I'm sorry, Lorelai, about everything you missed growing up."
"It's OK." She leaned past Rory and patted his arm. "I'm making up for it now. And I'll make sure that Rory has a good, solid background in family fun. And that's all thanks to you."
He glanced over again, taking notice of Rory's fluttering, sleepy eyes. "I have been wanting to talk to you alone for a while now. I wanted you to know that I tried to get Luke to admit to what's going on with him."
She shook her head, not following. "Admit what?"
"About…" He faded off, looking not just uncomfortable, but sorry that he'd brought it up at all. "About…well, you."
"Will!" She leaned forward, displacing Rory, who let out a half-hearted wail. Lorelai stifled her agitation and comforted her daughter. "You promised me!" she hissed at him.
"I didn't bring up anything you told me. This was all from me. Things that I wanted to talk to him about. I assure you, everything you told me in secret has stayed a secret."
She rubbed at her forehead, feeling crabby. "I don't know that's much better."
They drove in silence for a while. "I had to, Lorelai. I had to find out what's going on with him."
"Why?" She drew in a breath, then answered her own question. "Because of that day in the kitchen."
He nodded. "Because of that day in the kitchen."
She closed her eyes and groaned. "I am so sorry about that. It was just something that…happened. We were just talking, and then in an instant it turned into…something else."
"Something honest."
Lorelai was ready to disagree, but Will had said it so solemnly that it made her pause to consider. "I guess…that's one way to see it."
"And that's what I wanted him to think about. I wanted him to be honest about it, at least to himself."
Lorelai tried not to ask, but she couldn't help it. "Was he?"
Will reluctantly shook his head. "Not really. I think he feels like he's stuck, sort of the way he was before he started taking classes; back when he didn't know what to do with himself. He feels like he's the one who got himself in the position he's in, and if he tries to change direction now, then he's shirking his responsibility."
"To Rachel," Lorelai said quietly.
"That's right."
Lorelai worried her hands together. "I don't want this. I don't want to get in-between them. They're together, and they're trying. I don't want to be the reason Rachel gets hurt."
"I agree. But is it fair to Rachel, to have Luke stick with her if he's in love with someone else?"
Her cheeks flamed up. "He's not in love with me."
"Really? Let's remember who saw who, that day in the kitchen."
"Will, stop. I think you're giving that little scene way too much importance."
"Maybe so, but don't forget what we all saw at the dinner table tonight. Those two have some major differences about what they want out of life. Rachel was obviously upset that Luke wants to take more classes. And he's doing his usual terrible job of communicating. I'm not convinced that either of them are truly committed to this relationship of theirs."
Lorelai shook her head. "But it's their lives. Their relationship. Their decision."
Will waved a hand in the air. "All I want is for him to think about what he's doing, and why he's doing it. Like I said, I want him to be honest with himself. I told him that I'm stepping out of it. It's all up to him, now." He looked over at her. "But Lorelai, if he ever does wise up and come to you, you need to be honest, too. If he ever asks how you feel, you've got to tell him the truth."
Lorelai couldn't imagine that ever happening, so she felt confident in her reply. "Sure. Of course. If he ever dumps Rachel and appears on my doorstep, I'll be completely honest with him."
Will nodded, satisfied. "That's all I ask."
He stopped at the end of the lane and pulled the parking brake on the truck. "Let me take the sleepy princess in."
Will gently unbuckled Rory and carried her into their tiny home. He tried to put her into bed, but she clung to him.
"No, Paw-Paw, stay," she demanded sleepily.
"Maybe Mommy would say it's OK if I stay for one bedtime story?" He looked hopefully at Lorelai.
"Sure," she said. "One story."
He read three, but no one was really keeping count.
The next morning Lorelai was still under the influence of the sillies from the night before. She kept giggling as she cleaned the rooms. She'd remember the way Will had yelled for moo-cows, or the calm way Luke had claimed his victories, and she'd break out in a fit of laughter again. It wasn't Liz's morning to work, so she was alone with her giggle hangover.
Around ten o'clock, Lorelai was in the midst of cleaning her third room, when Connie, the maid who'd scored the Cabbage Patch dolls, stuck her head through the door. "Hey, Lorelai – Mia's looking for you."
"Oh, OK," she acknowledged, but continued to straighten the room, thinking she should complete that task before she went to see Mia.
Connie stepped further into the guestroom. "Hon, I think you should go now."
"That's OK, I'll just –"
"Go now," Connie said firmly, but then she pressed her lips together, looking hesitant. "Lorelai, I think…I'm pretty sure she's been crying. Go now, OK?"
The dusting cloth fell from her fingers as she stared at Connie. "What?"
"I'm not sure, but…something's wrong. The sooner you go check on her, the better."
Lorelai almost tripped over her own feet, trying to get to the door. At the last second she turned back, not sure about leaving her cart.
"It's OK," Connie said, with urgency in her voice. "I'll take care of it."
Lorelai nodded her thanks, then dove out of the doorway. She walked briskly, remembering how they'd been instructed to never run through the corridors, for fear of upsetting or bumping into their guests. But then Lorelai thought about Mia crying, and what terrible, horrible unknown thing would have had to occur to make Mia's composure shatter. She flew down the hall, her feet barely touching the carpet.
She grabbed hold of Mia's open door when she got there, trying to catch her breath. Mia was standing in front of her desk, her back to Lorelai. She knocked against the wood, letting Mia know she was there.
Mia spun around and Lorelai could see that Connie was right, she had been crying. When she spied Lorelai, the tears started again. She held out her arms to her.
In absolute terror, Lorelai stepped into the office, automatically closing the door behind her. She went to Mia and wrapped her arms about her.
For the first time, Lorelai noticed how much taller she was than Mia. How much sturdier her young bones were than those of the fragile woman crying against her vest. For three years Mia had been her rock; her champion; her guardian against all that could go wrong. In one overwhelming moment, that sense of order flipped. The mantle of protector passed to Lorelai's stronger shoulders.
"What's wrong?" she asked breathlessly, in the throes of fear. She steeled herself for the answer. Please, not Rory. Please, not Rory. Please…
"Oh, child." Mia pulled back and wiped her face, a useless motion since the tears kept coming. She grasped Lorelai's upper arms in a painful grip. "I'm so sorry to have to tell you this."
A tremor shuddered through her. "Just tell me."
Mia nodded, and took a shaky breath. "It's Will. He's…he's gone."
"Gone where?" Lorelai asked stupidly. It was stupid because she already knew. Of course she knew. She understood. But she couldn't admit it. Her heart couldn't yet risk accepting the news. It needed a few more seconds to catch up with the painful truth her brain had instantly processed.
"I'm so sorry, Lorelai. I'm so sorry." Mia sobbed again, clutching Lorelai tightly as the grief rolled through her.
"But – last night." Her mind was reeling, unable to reconcile her vibrant memory of him with the fact Mia had just presented. "I was just with him last night. We had so much fun. How could he…He drove me home!" she pointed out insistently, as if that was enough bona fide truth to reverse what had happened since. "He can't be…He can't be…" She looked pleadingly at Mia. "Gone? That's not possible. He was fine last night!"
Mia brushed the tears away again and took a deep breath. "He didn't open the store this morning. Customers were lined up, waiting outside the door. Someone finally went to the house. Luke came back with the extra key and went inside to check."
Whatever strength Lorelai had crumbled away. She had to lean against Mia's desk to remain upright. She could imagine it all so clearly. Luke opening the door with the extra key always left hanging in the kitchen at home. The dim light inside the store. Calling out for his dad but getting no reply. Searching through the aisles until –
"No," she whispered. She hunched her shoulders and covered her face with her hands, her heart pounding. "Oh, no, no, no. Oh, Luke. Poor, poor Luke," she gasped out, anguish roaring through her. Dozens of images flashed through her head, of Luke and Will together in their mutual admiration society. Luke revered his dad; that was obvious in everything he said and did. How could he ever get over such a loss? How could he ever get past the horror of this day?
Mia placed firm hands on her shoulders. "Listen to me, Lorelai. I know we're hurting. But somehow, we've got to push our grief aside. Liz and Luke need us. We've got to take care of them right now. How we're feeling comes second. We need to be there for them."
Lorelai wrenched her thoughts away from the silent, sad hardware store. She struggled to her feet. "Right. You're right." She understood that what Mia had just said was as much for Mia's benefit as it was for her. "What should I do?" she then asked, helplessly.
"I've already talked to the kitchen. They're getting some sandwich platters together, making some pastry trays. I told them to add some coffee urns and whatever else they can think of and put everything into the van. I want you to take the van to the house and be there with Liz. People will be stopping by all day, I'm sure, and we can provide something to eat and drink. It's not much, but people find having something in their hands to be comforting when they can't think of what to say." Mia paused for thought, seeing a schedule in her head. "I'll be there as soon as I can button up everything here, but until then, you'll take care of them, right?"
"Right," Lorelai repeated, not at all sure she was up to being the adult in charge. "Liz is at home?"
"Yes. Luke…he called her. And she then called me."
Lorelai nodded her head, trying to put the pieces together. "I should…go now?"
"Yes. I want you to get over there right now. I'll be there soon, I promise."
"OK." Lorelai looked over at the door, but her feet refused to take a step. Because as soon as she moved, everything was real. Right now she could still almost pretend that nothing had changed.
Suddenly Mia collapsed against her again, her shoulders shaking from another bout of tears. "I'm the only one left."
"What?" Lorelai asked gently. She tenderly brushed the back of Mia's head, the dear head that barely reached Lorelai's shoulder. Her fingers glided over the beautifully groomed white hair. For the second time in ten minutes, she was forced to accept that Mia wasn't invincible. She didn't stand ten feet tall. She wasn't ageless. It was Lorelai's turn to be in charge; her responsibility to face the ogres of grief waiting for them outside the inn.
"We lost Katie. Then my John. Now Will." She pulled in a breath. "I'm the only one left."
"Oh, Mia." Lorelai hugged her as tightly as she could, all at once able to see beyond her own despair. "I'm so sorry."
Mia disengaged and patted Lorelai's arms. "Don't listen to me. There'll be plenty of time later for my laments. You just get going." But then she hugged Lorelai again. "I love you, my dear."
"I love you too, Mia."
Somehow Lorelai made it down the corridor to the maid's room. She took off her nametag and grabbed her purse but didn't bother to change.
In the kitchen, Tanner the sous chef was stretching shrink-wrap around a platter of cookies. "We're almost ready," he told her.
One of the kitchen helpers, Ashley, was putting an assortment of Styrofoam cups, plastic utensils, and packets of powdered creamers and sugars into a cardboard box. She stopped and came over to embrace Lorelai. "Give Liz a hug from us, all right?"
"Of course," Lorelai said, still feeling dazed.
Rudolph, the always-imposing chef, snatched the van's keys from a peg and approached her with them. "You can drive, can't you?" he asked disdainfully.
"Yes, I can drive," she answered, taking the keys from him. At least, she thought she knew how to drive. With any luck her addled brain would remember how. Hopefully it was just like riding a bike.
Rudolph stepped back, giving her permission to go. "Give the family our sympathies," he stated, revealing a human side she didn't know he possessed.
"Yes, thank you." She looked around the kitchen, at all the activity. "Thank you all."
A filled box was pushed into her arms. They trooped out the kitchen door, to where a couple of the porters were fitting everything into the back of the van. The hatch slammed shut and the sliding door was pulled closed. She got into the driver's seat and started the engine.
The driving helped, because she had to concentrate on it. She followed the long lane to the road and then turned towards town, her attention focused on feeding enough gas to the engine, learning how to turn the steering wheel slightly to the right to keep the van lumbering down the center of the lane. She checked the rear-view mirror occasionally, to make sure nothing was getting jostled too badly in the back.
She drove through the center of town, heading towards the Danes house. But then, she stopped in the street. And looked to her left.
At the hardware store.
Barely conscious of what she was doing, she parked the van and hopped out, jaywalking across the street.
Liz. Yes, Liz. But first, she had to check on Luke. She had to.
Had to.
She saw her hand on the doorknob, almost as if it was someone else's hand. The sign said closed but it wasn't locked. She opened the door and stepped inside.
It was just as she'd imagined it. The space was dark. Silent. Her heart was beating in an anguished, grief-stricken rhythm she didn't recognize.
"Luke?" she tried to call out, but her voice wobbled.
Hesitantly she walked towards the counter, her footsteps echoing in the empty dimness. She turned her head from side to side, wondering if she was completely wrong.
But she sensed something. Someone. And then, she knew where he was.
She walked to the side of the store, where a curtain separated the public space from the private. She pushed it aside and looked at the stairs that led up to Will's office.
The door was ajar.
She ran up the steps and then paused before the door. Tentatively, she pushed it open further, peeking in as she did so.
Luke was sitting in the middle of the floor, bent over in sorrow. In a flash, she was there on the floor beside him. He looked at her, almost without recognition, grief having hollowed him out. She could see he'd been crying.
"Oh, Luke. Luke." She remembered the times he'd held her, and how much comfort and strength she'd taken from him. She put her arms around him, protecting him. Fiercely daring the demon of death to try and do its worst to him, now that she was here. She stroked his head and encouraged him to lay it against her. She rocked him gently, as if he was Rory. As if he was someone who also lived in her heart.
"I'm so sorry, Luke. So sorry." She rocked and hugged and whispered every soothing thing she could think of. She murmured how much she loved Will; how much she knew he loved Luke. She talked about what a wonderful dad he was; what an amazing grandfather. She didn't think about what she was saying, she just turned her warmest memories of Will into words. She sent the stream of soft whispers into Luke's ear. She held him even tighter when she felt him cry again.
She lost all track of time. She didn't notice the ache from where her knees were pressed against the old wooden floor. She wasn't aware of the muscles in her arms screaming to be released from their awkward positions. She held Luke and comforted him. And that was all she knew.
Then the front door opened, jarring her from her mission of compassion. "Luke?" someone shouted downstairs.
Gently, she put her hands on Luke's face and turned him to see her. She ignored the pins and needles of pain shooting throughout her body as she moved. "Rachel's here," she told him, her voice still soft, but taking on more authority. She shifted him slightly, to make sure he was focused on her. "Do you understand? Rachel's here now. I'm going to have to go."
His dull eyes were on hers, but he gave no sign he understood what she was saying. Nevertheless, she had to go.
She tilted his head downwards and came in closer to him. She kissed his forehead, holding her lips to his skin for several long seconds. Seconds that she couldn't afford to squander, but neither could she tear herself away from him just yet. At last she pulled back, again trying to see into his eyes and judge whether he was cognizant of anything, let alone that it was her.
She caressed his face, then hugged him one last time. "Rachel will take care of you. I'll see you soon."
Groaning, she got to her feet, then staggered to the top of the stairs, forcing her legs to work again. "Rachel!" she called out. "Up here!"
She heard the other woman's footsteps, heading towards the curtain. At the foot of the stairs, Rachel looked up at her, and once again, Lorelai caught the worry/suspicion/jealousy combo that briefly splashed across her face.
Rachel quickly ascended the steps, and Lorelai braced herself for what she needed to do.
"I'm so glad you're here," she said, throwing her arms around Rachel. She hugged her tightly, and after the smallest instant of uncertainty, Rachel hugged her back. "Luke's in bad shape. Now that you're here, I can go to Liz."
She felt Rachel relax in her arms, and then pull away. "How bad?" she asked grimly.
"He hasn't said a word," Lorelai told her, and Rachel nodded. She started toward the office door, but Lorelai grabbed her for one more hug. "I'm so sorry," she whispered to Luke's girlfriend. "What a loss."
Rachel patted her back in mutual sympathy. "God, this is an awful day," she agreed mournfully. With a sad smile, she broke away and went to comfort Will's son.
Which was exactly what she should do. Comforting Luke was Rachel's job. Her place. Her role.
Lorelai closed her eyes and focused solely on what she needed to do next. She went down the stairs, walked across the dark, silent store, and stepped out of the door, ignoring the bells that chimed over her head.
Stupid bells, that didn't recognize that life had changed. Not understanding that their cheerful notes would never be needed again.
She drove the van over to the house and parked in the back, between the house and the garage. Nervously, she tried the back door and found it open.
Liz was sitting at the kitchen table. Lists and slips of paper and address books were spread before her. The phone was in her hand, but she wasn't using it. She was just holding the receiver, looking as though she'd never placed a phone call in her entire life.
"Liz?" Lorelai slid into the chair next to her. "What are you doing?"
"I should…I should do something." Liz looked over at her. "Luke will have enough to do. I can at least make phone calls."
"That's a great idea," Lorelai praised her, but at the same time, she gently extricated the phone from her clenched hand, and replaced it back on the base. "But you know what? I can do that. You tell me who to call, and then leave it up to me."
"I…I don't know." Liz gestured towards the papers scattered before her. "I don't know who to call, and I don't know what to say."
"Not a problem," Lorelai assured her. "Let's take a couple of minutes to think about it, then. Let's talk about how you are instead." She held her friend's hands in hers, trying to warm them up, because they felt like ice. "What can I do for you? How about a cup of nice hot coffee?"
Liz's whole face quivered. "My dad's dead."
Even though the words were said bluntly, Lorelai could tell that Liz hadn't really accepted the reality of them. "I know. I'm so sorry." She squeezed Liz's hands again.
"He – Luke went to the store. And found him. Dead."
"Liz, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
"He was just gone. They said there was nothing they could do."
Lorelai pulled her chair closer to Liz, then leaned over to hug her. "It's so terrible. I wish I could think of something better to say than I'm sorry, but that's all I've got right now. I'm so sorry."
"Do you think he knew?" Liz asked wistfully, leaning against Lorelai.
"Knew what?" Lorelai asked cautiously, nervous that the conversation was headed into some uncomfortably spiritual space.
"About me. That I loved him."
Lorelai felt tears spring to her eyes, but she batted them away. "Of course he did!"
"I've never been real good about saying it."
"No one is. But think about how happy he's been, having you and Jess here. He loved you unconditionally."
"I've been such a screw-up. Ever since Mom died. Poor Dad, he tried so hard with me, but he never really knew what to do."
"Hey, I'm looking at the result. He did great."
Liz sighed, then brought her focus back to Lorelai. "You really think he knew?"
"Liz, remember last night. Think about the fun he was having. He knew, sweetie. You bet he knew."
"He's been so fed up with me, for so long."
"Was, Liz. Was. If he was, it was in the past. Think about a few weeks ago, at the nursery school program. Think about what he said to you. He was proud of you. He loved you so much. You made him so happy."
"And…he knew, right?"
"He absolutely knew."
Liz groaned softly, sadly, and laid her head against Lorelai, letting Lorelai hold and comfort her. After a few minutes of camaraderie, she roused herself. "I should at least call Louie."
"Louie? Your uncle, right?"
"Yeah. He should know right away, don't you think?"
"Maybe?"
Liz flipped through the address book and found the right entry. She reached for the phone but stopped. "I just really don't know how to begin. What do I say?"
Lorelai put her hand over Liz's. "Why don't you let me place the call? I could break the ice. You can jump in any time you feel up to it."
"You'd do that?"
"Of course I would. Do you want me to call now?"
Liz nodded, and pushed the address book Lorelai's way.
"OK," Lorelai said, trying to sound much more confident than she felt. She inhaled, telling herself to be brave in front of Liz. She dialed the numbers carefully with her shaking finger. "It's ringing," she whispered to Liz.
"Hello?" A man's gruff voice answered the phone.
"Hi! Um, hi. I'm looking to reach Louie Danes."
"You got him, sweetheart."
"Oh, OK! Uh, Mr. Danes, you don't know me, but –"
"Louie."
"Right, Louie. You don't know me, but my name is Lorelai Gilmore, and I'm –"
"Oh, you're Will's girl!"
Something sharp stung Lorelai's eyes and heart. "Yes, yes I am," she practically whispered, in total agreement. "Listen, Mr. Danes –"
"Louie," he reminded her again.
"Liz asked me to call you, she wanted me to tell you –"
"Is Lizzie OK?" he demanded abruptly, suddenly sounding worried.
"Yes, yes, she's fine. She's right here." Lorelai sucked in another deep breath of air, preparing to dive in. "Mr. Danes – Louie – it's Will I'm calling about."
Silence on his end. Then, "Tell me," he insisted, his voice already breaking.
"I'm so sorry, but Will passed away this morning."
Another few seconds of silence, as the news settled. "Dammit," he muttered. "Hell, no. That can't be…that can't be right. He's…he's my baby brother."
"I'm so sorry," Lorelai whispered.
"What happened?"
Lorelai tried to convey the little she knew. "He went to the store this morning, like normal, but never opened the door. Luke went over to check and found out that…he'd passed away."
"Ah, no. Not Luke. Poor kid. Damn it!" Louie exploded into curses, railing at the universe. "Was it his heart?" he asked, when he'd regained some calmness.
"Um, that I don't know. I haven't heard anything yet about the cause." She looked at Liz.
Liz put out her hand, indicating she wanted the phone.
"Here's Liz, she'd like to talk to you now."
"Lizzie, sweetheart, you OK?" Lorelai heard Louie ask as she passed the phone over.
"Louie," Liz said, as she began to cry, but she was smiling, too. "I'm not OK, but I'm trying to cope." She sniffled, and Lorelai got up to find tissues. "It's good to hear your voice."
"You, too, kid," she heard Louie say, as she sat the box of tissues in front of Liz. She listened for a while, idly straightening up the counter next to the sink. When she realized that Liz was settling in, taking comfort from talking with her uncle, she decided to go out and start bringing in the supplies from the van.
She was on her third trip when she heard someone walking up to her. Before she could turn to see who, Miss Patty's strong arms and a cloud of Calvin Kline's Obsession enveloped her.
"Lorelai, darling, I just heard." Patty gave her another crushing hug before releasing her. "It's true? About Will?"
"I'm afraid so."
"Oh, you poor thing. Those poor kids," Patty lamented. "What a shock." Patty looked at the supplies still in the van with a seasoned eye. "What can I do? Let me help."
"Could you hold the door open while I bring in some more stuff?"
"Of course. And here, I can take a box, too." She picked up the box filled with coffee essentials and headed to the back door.
In the kitchen, Liz was just hanging up the phone. "Elizabeth, I'm so sorry." Miss Patty threw her arms around Liz, giving her an all-encompassing hug, too. Lorelai could see that Liz found the embrace comforting, so she left the two of them and went out to the van again.
She was still loading up her arms when Mia pulled in next to the van and quickly got out. "Here I am. How are things?" she wanted to know.
"Liz is…coping, she says. Miss Patty is here. We just called Louie."
Mia had been reaching for a platter of sandwiches but paused to purse her mouth. "Well, it had to be done eventually, I guess."
"You don't like Louie?"
"Let's just say that Louie is an acquired taste," Mia said tactfully, but Lorelai knew what that meant in Mia's vocabulary.
Once again in the kitchen, Mia put down the platter on the table and rushed to Liz. Seeing that Liz was well cared for, Lorelai made another trip outside.
Mrs. Dalton, the Danes' neighbor, had just returned home and was walking up her steps to the front door. Lorelai had chatted with her numerous times and appreciated the way she never minded when the kids shrieked during outdoor playtime. "Mrs. Dalton?" she said, hurrying over to catch her.
"Hello, Lorelai! Another party today?" She smiled, pointing to the food she could see in the van.
Lorelai went still, unable to believe that they had been partying, just a few hours ago. Before the world forever changed. "No, I'm afraid it's just the opposite."
"The opposite?" She frowned, not comprehending.
"I guess you haven't heard yet. Will passed away, early this morning."
Mrs. Dalton's eyes went wide. She dropped the mail that had been in her hand, and they both bent to pick up the envelopes and flyers.
"Oh, no. Oh, no," she kept murmuring. "Oh, Lorelai. I'm so sorry." She reached out and took Lorelai's hands, crushing the mail they both held. "What can I do?"
"Maybe you could let the other neighbors know?"
"Yes, of course. Oh, God, this is terrible. Just terrible." She glanced at the Danes' house. "Don't hesitate to come get me if you need me. I'd be happy to watch the kids, or anything else. You just let me know."
The kids. Lorelai hadn't even thought about the kids' place in this heartbreak. "Yes, I will. And once any arrangements are made, or if there's other news, I'll let you know."
"Thank you, yes. Please don't hesitate to come get me at any time." She squeezed Lorelai's hands again. "I'm so sorry. This is going to devastate everyone."
Lorelai nodded and turned towards the van. Devastation pretty well summed it up.
Inside, she found plenty to do in arranging the coffeepot and other things Mia had the foresight to order from the inn. She kept an eye on Liz and busied herself with what needed doing. She watched over Mia, too. It wasn't long before neighbors began to drop by. She accepted their condolences and offered drinks and snacks.
Mia caught her in the kitchen. "Where's Luke?"
"He's still at the store. With Rachel."
Mia didn't ask her how she knew that, and Lorelai didn't offer any further explanation.
"Well," Mia sighed, "he needs to come home soon. He and Liz need to talk about what's to be done." She sighed again. "Poor boy."
Lorelai nodded and went off to make another pot of coffee.
Finally she looked at the clock and knew she couldn't put it off any longer. She went over to Liz. "It's time to go pick up the kids."
Startled, Liz also looked at the clock. "Oh, gosh, it is, isn't it?" She turned to face Lorelai. "Do you want to take my car?"
"No, I'll just walk." She swallowed hard. "Do you want me – should I tell them what's happened?"
Liz's eyes opened to their limit, and Lorelai knew she hadn't thought about it, either. "I…I don't know. I guess…yes?" She looked around the living room, full of neighbors and sadness. "As soon as they get here, they'll know something's wrong, won't they?" She leaned against Lorelai. "But I hate to put it all on you."
Lorelai licked her lips and tried to sound courageous. "Why don't I kind of play it by ear? I'll do my best to prepare them, but I wish…I wish I knew how to tell them."
"I know." Liz put her arms around Lorelai. "Just bring them home, and we'll figure it out."
"OK. I'll be back soon." She smiled as reassuringly as she could at Liz, and then left through the back door, not wanting anyone to ask where she was going.
She walked the few blocks to the church with her head down, panicking over what she was going to have to say to them.
Down in the church basement, she collapsed onto an extra pew stored in the hallway, which served as a bench for waiting parents. Often she and Liz cut it close when picking up the kids because of their work schedules, but today she was a few minutes early. Other moms and dads and caregivers were milling about, talking and laughing as they waited for the classroom doors to open. She could hear goodbye songs being sung behind the doors, and reminders being given by the teachers.
Rev. Skinner bustled through the narrow hallway, greeting those who were waiting. He paused a moment in front of Lorelai. She raised her head, automatically trying to smile, but her lips felt frozen together. Immediately he sat down beside her.
"You look distressed, Lorelai. Is there anything I can do?"
Oh, was there. "I don't think many people have heard the news yet, about Will?"
Lines of concern deepened on the minister's face. "No. Oh my, what's happened?"
Lorelai found that the sentence was getting easier to say each time she repeated it, although she was no closer to accepting it. "He passed away this morning."
He gasped, then closed his eyes briefly and clasped his hands together. When he opened them, he looked at her with profound kindness. "I am so sorry to hear that. This whole town will grieve along with the family. He was such a beloved member of the community."
"Yes. Yes, he was." Lorelai choked, feeling tears tickling her throat.
He looked over at the classroom door. "The children don't know?"
"No, it happened after they'd left this morning," she quavered.
"How can I help?" He put his hand on top of hers, and it was warm and steady.
"I don't know what to say to the kids," she admitted. "Will they even understand, if I try to tell them?"
He nodded thoughtfully. "The most important thing you can do is to reassure them. They pick up on their parents' worries so easily. They'll know at once that something is wrong, that their world is out of whack. They'll sense that you are sad. Tell them it's OK to be sad. Let them know that no matter what, they'll be taken care of. Let them know that they are loved and that you are there for them, and will continue take care of them, even in the midst of sadness. They need to hear the message that the core of their world will not change, even with the loss."
"That makes sense," Lorelai said, feeling a little bit better. "But will they understand? About death?"
"Well, we've had to touch on it. Jamila's grandmother passed away before Easter. We lost a gerbil in the four's class. We've discussed the seasons, how leaves and flowers die." He sighed. "But yes, it's a very weighty topic. Don't be surprised if you think they understand one day, but the next they come right back with the same questions again."
Lorelai did better with her smile this time. "I might be the same way."
"As are all of us," the minister agreed.
The door to the middle classroom opened and a dozen little voices raised into a roar.
As they stood up, Rev. Skinner quickly turned to her. "Would you like me to help you break the news to them? We could go into my office."
Lorelai almost wobbled in relief. "Yes, thank you! I would be so grateful for that, you have no idea."
The door to the three-year-old classroom opened. Almost instantly, Miss Lulu spotted them standing there, and seemed to sense that something was wrong. Unobtrusively, while telling all of the other children goodbye, she got hold of both Rory and Jess, and walked them across the hall to Lorelai and Rev. Skinner.
He bent down to their level. "How would you like to go see my office? Mommy Lorelai is going to come with us."
"Yes!" Rory said.
"Sure," Jess shrugged.
Before they walked away, Lulu smiled compassionately at her and patted her arm, apparently able to read the adults' faces as easily as she did those of her small students.
Lorelai turned and followed the minister to his compact office, where she braced herself to do the saddest thing she'd ever done.
Author's Condolences: I too am heartbroken. A lot of you sensed that this was coming, but it doesn't make it any easier. I love all of you, so much.