A/N Not normally angsty – I like them snogging too much. Hope you enjoy!
Jilytober – 7th Year Angst.
"So when are you going to tell him Lils?" Dorcas asked whilst lounging across the seat on the Hogwarts Express.
Lily, Marlene and Mary sat across from her together and Lily raised her eyebrows.
"Tell who, what?" she replied, feigning innocence.
Marlene scoffed " Oh please Lily, we can all remember the drunken confession from Saturday." she stood, "Why do you have all the space Dor? Shove over." Dorcas obligingly lifted her feet and Marlene slid under them settling herself comfortably down. She selected a chocolate frog from their heap on the table and eyed Lily shrewdly.
"So, Lils? You haven't answered," She opened her chocolate frog, waiting expectantly.
Lily blushed and looked to Mary for help, who shrugged her shoulders in reply. She sighed and chose her words carefully.
"Well if I were to fancy a friend of ours, and I'm not saying I do mind, but if I did... well I figured I will just wait for said friend to ask me to the Hogsmeade weekend. You know, as usual," Lily looked around the room for approval. Marlene grinned.
"Sound plan, he will definitely ask you."
The conversation drifted and Lily was only half listening, she held a warm feeling in her chest. Hold the prefects meeting, organise the first years and then the feast and at the end of the feast, James would walk her to the common room and then as he had done for the past three years he would ask if she wanted to go to Hogsmeade, and this year, this year she would say yes.
Lily slid into her seat in the Great Hall just before the sorting began. Marlene leaned in close to her, squeezing her hand.
"Have you seen Jamie?" she whispered conspiratorially.
"Yes, did you know?!" Lily hissed back.
"Of course, he told us on Sunday at lunch before we came back," Marlene smiled slyly.
"So you've known for 24 hours and at no point, after our conversation on Saturday night did you think to tell me that the Head Boy this year was James bloody Potter? How am I going to do this Marley? I couldn't even think straight in that meeting..." Lily trailed off to smile at James as he slid into his seat further up and then frowned at Marlene.
"I just wanted to let you sweat," and Marlene turned to face Dumbledore who began his speech.
Lily and James escorted the first years up to the Gryffindor Tower, giving them little tidbits of history as they went. Lily was bringing up the rear of the excited group and used the time to admire his hair and his broad shoulders. Had he gotten broader over the summer she wondered? She snapped out of her daydream as she realised, he was talking to her.
"Sorry what?"
James looked a little irritated, "I said, have you got the password, Evans?"
"Oh yes, sure I do, it's humdinger," she smiled back at him as he turned to portrait hole.
A short while later they had settled them into the dorms and Lily came back down the stairs and joined the seventh years who had graduated to the best seats in the house by the fire. James was already playing chess with Sirius and Dorcas was braiding Marlene's hair.
There were two empty seats, one beside James and one opposite Mary. Marlene gave her an encouraging smile and nodded to the seat next to James. "Hold still!" hissed Dorcas.
Lily slid into the seat next to James, thinking for sure he must hear her heart beating out of her chest as their thighs touched. He didn't look up.
"Evans!" Sirius greeted her jovially "How are you feeling about working with James here all year?"
Lily laughed, "Oh I am sure I will get used to him. I just hope he doesn't add to my workload, or you! I hope you have turned over a new leaf?"
"Lily dearest, I turn over a new leaf every Monday," Sirius grinned and then whooped triumphantly as his Queen took James' King. James huffed and leant back. Lily thought her heart would literally stop as their shoulders now touched too. After what she was sure was an age he turned to her.
"Evans," he greeted her, "Did you get your firsties settled in?"
"Yeah, I did, they were excitable, but they are unpacking their trunks now." She smiled and he nodded.
A moment passed, and Lily waited expectantly, face upturned towards his. James smiled his lopsided grin and then stood.
"Well lads, and ladies," he mock bowed at the girls. "I am going to set an excellent example here and turn in." He turned to Sirius, who in surprise stood also, "Yeah, actually, so am I," appearing baffled Sirius threw his arm around James' shoulder and they moved off. Remus and Peter made their excuses and the four of them retreated up the stairs.
Lily's heart sank a little, he hadn't even started up a conversation with her. She turned to the girls, who were all staring at her. "Oh don't give me that, I don't need any pity," she huffed and turned in her seat. Marlene stood and moved to sit beside her, "Didn't ask you then?"
"No he did not," Lily searched her friends face, "He always asks me, he asks me here in the common room on our first night back, and then I say no, and then he smiles and says, next year Evans," Lily looked around bewildered, "why didn't he ask me, Marley?"
"Oh honey, I don't know, I expect he still will" She pulled Lily into a hug and Lily felt the pricks of tears behind her eyes begin to start. She swiped furiously at her cheeks and stood to leave. The others watched her a little sadly. Dorcas grabbed her hand, "Lily don't go, we can catch up more,"
"No, I ummmmm, I have a headache," Lily turned and fled the common room, taking the stairs two at a time she headed into her dorm, looking for her trunk before remembering she stayed in the Head's room now. Feeling foolish and cross she turned with a sigh and fled back down the stairs.
She made her way straight across the room, out of the portrait hole and across the corridor to her new dorm, not stopping despite the girls calling for her.
Their small joint study space was empty, "Good, no sign of Potter," she announced to the room and then jumped as his door opened.
"You say something Evans?" he asked concern etched across his face.
"No Potter, anything you want to say?" Lily bit back.
"I think I'm good," he ruffled his hair, and then turning back towards his room, he paused then turned around again "Evans?"
"Yes Potter?" she looked over at him leaning casually on the door frame. Irritated that he made her stomach swoop, she added more brusquely than intended "did you need something?"
"No, don't reckon I did. Sleep tight, don't let the nifflers bite," James said softly with a grin and turned in.
Lily groaned in exasperation and went into her room, shutting the door firmly with a click. She slid down onto the floor and let the tears that were threatening her fall. It would appear James Potter was over Lily Evans.