-Present-
"No car again, huh?" Will greets when he finally gets home early Saturday morning after staying up all night waiting for his boss and taking him home, barely escaping the airport. He sounds exhausted and cranky, which probably means picking up his boss wasn't a cover.
Delphine is lounging on the couch, nursing a headache. "I was not in a state to drive," she mumbles.
"That would explain a lot," he sits next to her tiredly. "You were a bit vulgar last night".
"Filters tend to malfunction when you're intoxicated," she replies, unwilling to delve deeper.
"How's your friend?" Will ignores her reluctance.
"She's fine".
"Maybe I should come to Martell with you next time you go. See what all the fuss is about," Will suggests. She can't help thinking he sounds like a protective father.
"You want to meet her?"
"Would that be so bad?" Delphine sighs and shakes her head. She doesn't see there being much of a problem, but she doesn't like her worlds mixing.
William eventually goes to bed, fatigue taking priority. Delphine watches him drag his feet up the stairs and waits for the sound of the bedroom door closing to take out her phone.
Delphine: This is Cosima, non?
She presses send before she's able to be overwhelmed by anxiety. She doesn't usually have the privilege of a blank memory when she gets drunk, and today is no different. She said a lot last night while she was under the influence that she wouldn't have chosen to say otherwise.
Cosima: Oui oui ;)
Delphine smiles and rolls her eyes. Repositioning so she's more comfortable, her phone takes up her full attention.
Delphine: Have you stolen my car yet?
Cosima: Yes. I drove to florida while you were sleeping
Delphine: I suppose I have no need to retrieve it then
Cosima: But I could drive it back to its original parking spot in front of my apartment…if you really want me to
Delphine: You've probably gotten it all dirty from the drive. I'll just buy a new one
Cosima: Too late, I already drove it back and went through a luxury carwash on the way
Delphine: Well, since you went through all that trouble…I guess I should accept
Cosima: Do you have a ride here? I don't think I'm qualified to actually drive that thing more than a block…an empty block…a four-lane empty block…
Delphine: I believe that. I'll get a cab
A feeling of uneasiness hits her as she remembers the tail-end of last night's events. Cosima never got around to actually kissing her – aside from her cheek and a small portion of her neck – but the course was headed in a direction she wasn't prepared for. At least, she thought.
She felt unprepared after Madeline returned and talked to her, that is. When it was just her and Cosima, the trajectory of their activity may not have been verbally announced, but it was obvious where things were going, and Delphine felt fine. She felt highly motivated. She felt no fear, no hesitation. This could all be due to her drinking, though. Maybe it was for the best that Madi interrupted them.
Still though, thinking about it over and over as the cab zigzags through the streets to Cosima's place, she can't seem to make herself feel that same dread – only the anticipation. Again, the frustration and tension and stomach-knots. Perhaps, then, it was the alcohol that made her scared in the first place rather than the other way around. Maybe not…
"Miss?" Delphine is brought back to the present when the driver shrugs toward the apartment building that they're parked in front of.
"Sorry," she hands him some cash and steps out of the vehicle. Cosima's window isn't on the front side of the building, so she can't attempt to peek into her life before knocking on the door.
She climbs the stairs, Cosima's unit only being on the third floor, and goes over everything she said to her last night (again). She opened up more than she should have. It didn't feel like a game, like their typical flirtatious banter. It was far too real. She stops on the second floor, wanting to run, but knowing she can't.
She knocks on the door and leans her back against the wall next to it, half-hoping Cosima doesn't answer.
Cosima answers right away.
"Hey, you got here quick," she greets with a warm smile. "Come in, gimme just a sec. I should probably put some pants on".
Delphine follows the woman inside, closing the door behind her. Cosima is drying her hair with a towel, headed towards her open bedroom in nothing but a tank-top and tight spandex shorts. Delphine can already feel herself buzzing. She looks away. Cosima pulls a pair of loose sweatpants over her legs, both relieving and disappointing her company.
"So," she starts, throwing her towel in a hamper by her bathroom. "I'll give you your keys on the condition that we talk first".
"That doesn't sound unreasonable," Delphine hears herself say in her typical flirtatious voice. It's unbelievable how unconscious it is. It's just the way she talks to Cosima. Seductively, mysteriously, flirtatiously.
"Alright, have a seat," Cosima motions to a stool by the small breakfast bar in the kitchen. Delphine sits and Cosima takes the stool next to her. She notices that Cosima doesn't have her glasses on, but her eyeliner is still perfect, apparently taking precedence in her morning routine. "Now, I've had plenty of drunk nights that I pretend never happened. I've been with women who wake up next to me and prefer to disappear and never be heard from again. At this point, it doesn't really bother me. I just want to know what you want. Just a courtesy". She sounds embarrassed or nervous.
"I didn't wake up next to you," Delphine smiles, trying to get out of answering. She doesn't have an answer. She doesn't even quite understand the question.
"I know that, smartass," Cosima rolls her eyes. "Things happened though, at least in my memory they did. We don't have to talk about it, I just want to know if I'm supposed to remember last night or not".
Delphine still can't pick out what the girl means. Their not-so-light-hearted conversation? The…physical contact? "You may have to be more specific," she settles with, noticing her stare frequently falling on Cosima's lips. She has to get up. Delphine stands next to her stool, keeping it between Cosima and herself, and leans against the counter.
"C'mon, Delphine. You know what I'm talking about," Cosima crosses her arms.
"I won't tell you what you do or do not remember," she finally comes to an answer. "I remember all of last night, up until the moment I fell asleep in my bed at home. Do you ask this question often?" She turns to an accusatory tone.
"Yeah…people seem to prefer it," Cosima replies, a bit of attitude peeking through as well.
"You should hold people accountable, Cosima. Otherwise, they can get away with nearly anything. Your guests should be held responsible for their own actions. This is just an indirect way of asking whether someone regrets it or not," she criticizes in a cruel voice. She didn't mean to sound so bitchy.
Cosima glares at her with irritation. She stands and pushes the stool that stood between them out of the way. Delphine watches, terrified, as the woman approaches her, trapping her against the counter with her hands grabbing the countertop on either side of Delphine.
"So, that means you want to be held accountable for shoving your hands up my shirt, touching me – another woman. You want to be held accountable for letting me kiss you," she asks in a voice that's caught somewhere between hostile and seductive.
"You never kissed me," Delphine holds her ground, but her weakness is evident.
"Yes, I did. Just not where you wanted me to," she glances at Delphine's lips, raising her brow.
"Hm, I'd have to disagree," Delphine tries to take back some control, to lead the conversation into a more flirtatious zone. It may not be ideal, but it's safer.
"So, you wanted this?" Cosima reclaims Delphine's neck, exploring further than she had the night before. The blonde allows it without question, somehow enjoying it more than when she was intoxicated. "And this?" Cosima pauses to take a sharp inhale, grabbing Delphine's hands and placing them just under the hem of her tank-top, exactly where they began their journey less than twelve hours ago.
Against her will, Delphine continues her inspection of the woman's body. She feels the tautness of her stomach, still damp from a hot shower, and travels upward to her ribs until she meets the bottom of her bra. Cosima moves to the other side of her neck, intent on leaving some kind of mark. Delphine finds the dip of her spine and descends to the small of her back. Without thinking, she feels herself pulling Cosima closer to her – an unwise decision since it only feeds the fire.
"So," Cosima pants next to her ear, "You don't regret last night, then?"
"I…" Delphine can't seem to concentrate, even though most of the activity has stopped, Cosima's breath on her neck is distracting. "I regret saying some of what I said, but…nothing else".
"And you still don't want me to forget anything? Not even to save face?" Cosima moves her head back a few inches so she can look into the woman's eyes – the woman who's still holding her as close as she possibly can.
"I'm not really one to deny the truth. I prefer keeping that principle intact," she can barely concentrate on anything but Cosima's lips and she feels like a fool for it, as though she's still drunk.
"Well, if you like telling the truth so much, tell me…" Cosima smirks, obviously noticing what's been diverting her guest's attention. "Do you want to kiss me?"
"The truth and the reality of what will happen aren't the same," Delphine dodges.
"Not at all what I asked," Cosima's smirk grows with the knowledge she has more control right now.
"Yes," Delphine gives in. She makes no move in her direction, though.
"Yes, what?" Cosima slides her hand up to Delphine's neck, reminding her of that first night Delphine came to her apartment and she passed up the opportunity to kiss her.
Cosima is only adding more disruption, her thumb moving gently against her jaw. "Yes…" she tries to finish, but Cosima is inching forward ever so slowly. It's purposeful and Delphine knows that, but it's still heart-stopping.
"Mhm?" Cosima's smirk grows as she prompts Delphine to continue.
It takes a moment for the blonde to realize that Cosima thinks she's in control, and as much as she wants to kiss the woman, she won't let her be the one in control. She won't be controlled by anyone but herself, and it gives her the strength to forego her own needs. She takes a deep breath and relaxes her tensed body. "Yes, Cosima. I want to kiss you," she admits with a smile, pushing the smaller woman back by her hips. Her hand slides off of Delphine's neck. "But not as much as I want to be right," she smiles again and leaves Cosima in the kitchen. She told Cosima that she most definitely wouldn't be the one to give in first. It would be Cosima to give in. She's not forfeiting this just yet.
"Seriously?" Cosima scoffs, following close behind. "That's more important to you?"
Delphine shrugs, wandering around the living room, stepping around the mess of pillows. To get from one area to another in Cosima's apartment is no more than a few steps. "It appears so," she replies in that same tone that she uses at the bar. This evasive, mysterious Delphine is who she's more comfortable being. At least around Cosima.
"What if I kissed you? Would you kiss me back?" Cosima struts toward her, making Delphine back away, careful to avoid the many obstacles on the floor.
"You'll just have to find out," she stops retreating when the backs of her legs feel the frame of the bed. She crosses her arms instead.
"I want you to tell me," she argues, stopping when she's half a foot from Delphine.
"Why would I give away the answer? So that you don't feel like you're taking a risk?" she tries to maintain her assertive voice, but it falters every time Cosima glances at her lips. "What do you predict I'll do?"
"I don't know, Delphine. You strike me as a kind of evil person. Maybe you've strung me along this far just to reject me and accuse me of forcing adultery upon you," she takes another step toward the blonde, only a few inches between them now.
"Based on your experience with me, what do you think is going to happen?" She repeats.
"You want to know what I think?" she grins dangerously, and Delphine shrugs. Cosima grabs her wrists and throws her arms down, uncrossing them, and then shoves the woman back so she's sitting on the edge the bed. She waits until she's crouched over the blonde, confining her, before continuing, "I think you are dying for this. And I think that, if Mads hadn't scared you off last night, you would have woken up next to me. I think the excuse that I have to kiss you first so that you don't have to lie is pathetic. And I think you're totally right: I am really bad at self-control, and I won't be able to deny myself," she surprises Delphine by pushing her back again until she's completely flat on the bed, and then diving down to kiss her.
Of course, Delphine kisses her back. There was never a doubt about that. She holds onto Cosima's arms on either side of her head for support. The initial crash subsides, and the kiss turns slow and drawn-out. Both women rob and relinquish dominance, alternating as inconsistently as possible. Their tongues dance around each other, teeth nip at skin. It isn't until Delphine's hands move down to Cosima's torso that their kiss halts. Cosima sits up for a moment, grabbing both Delphine's hands and pinning them above her head.
"Delphine, I need to know what you want," Cosima states with a plain expression.
"Why," she sighs, closing her eyes for a moment.
"Mostly so that I can know what to do – or not do – but also because you seem so opposed to telling me," she smiles when Delphine opens her eyes.
"What about what you want? Is that not relevant?" She continues her attempts at evasion, the rising anxiety becoming clear in her voice.
"It is, but I don't imagine your wants would exceed my limitations, whereas my wants may exceed yours".
"Presumptuous," Delphine shrugs.
"You're stalling," Cosima relaxes for a moment, laying half-beside and half-atop Delphine. "Do you want to stop?" she asks seriously. Delphine bites her lip and shakes her head. "Okay, then what's making you hesitant to tell me – mechanics or morality?"
"What? Mechanics or–"
The vibrations of Delphine's cellphone interrupt them, yet again. She knows by now that Cosima won't continue a conversation until she answers it.
"Hello?" Cosima watches the woman's stomach move up and down with her breath while she listens to Delphine's half of the conversation. "I haven't had a chance yet. Let's meet soon. Maybe you can give me some direction," Cosima notices her using that flirtatious voice she's accustomed to. "Privately, Benjamin," she smiles and chuckles airily. "Friday?" She looks at Cosima and grins, "Do you know Martell Lounge? … Look it up. I'll see you then".
She hangs up, but her grin only grows. "You and Benji seem tight…"
"Is someone jealous?" Cosima's cheeks go pink as Delphine examines her face.
"I don't get jealous," she scoffs.
Delphine giggles and maneuvers herself on top of Cosima. "Mm. Tell me another lie".
"Ugh, I hate you," Cosima groans, slapping her hands over her face.
"Well, that lie is a little too obvious," she smiles to herself and kisses the back of Cosima's hands where her lips should be.
Cosima reveals her tinted face and embarrassed grin, "Is Benji…I thought you said you've never done this before…"
"What?"
"I don't know. Whatever this is," she shrugs.
"I haven't. Benjamin…that's about fucking someone over. Not simply fucking someone," she smirks. Her language takes Cosima by surprise.
"So, is that what this is? Fucking someone?" Cosima asks hesitantly. She would prefer that to being fucked over, but, so far, Delphine hasn't been entirely clear about what's actually happening.
"I would hope so," she nods and takes a quick glimpse at Cosima's lips before swooping down to capture them. After her fleeting conversation with Benjamin, she's feeling practically giddy and much more confident and her nerves have died down to an easily overridden level. There's no new information, but Benjamin's reminder of an ongoing situation eases her, makes her happy even.
"I don't suppose your improved mood would like to tell me what you want?" Cosima tries for one last shot at transparency.
"Cosima," Delphine exhales, irritated that she paused the kiss, but still willing to comply. "I want to take your clothes off and stay in this bed all day long with you," she declares with a surprising level of enthusiasm.
"Wow. Fucking over Ben really changes a person," she lets her hands ride up Delphine's back under her shirt.
"Benjamin is not the target. He's just assisting," Delphine clarifies between kisses. "However, he did say he was talking to my husband right before he called me. That means Mr. Delphine is awake and I need to go".
"What? No, why?" Cosima holds her tight, not letting her escape. "To hell with Mr. Delphine. You'd rather be with him right now?"
"Aren't you adorable when you're jealous," Delphine relaxes for a moment, in no rush. She, in fact, would not rather be with William right now. "You know, he wants to meet you".
"Oh God, that should be fun," Cosima rolls her eyes. "I'm a terrible actor, so you know I won't be able to make him believe I have no interest in his hot wife". Delphine nods, shrugs, and makes another getaway attempt. "No, no, no," she squeezes tighter yet. "You can't just come here, make out with me on my bed, tell me you want, you know, nakedness, and then leave. That's so cruel".
Delphine smiles and bites her lip, pleased to see their roles have been restored. "It could be worse".
"I think even homeless starving children would feel sorry for me. I seriously doubt life gets any worse than you leaving right now," she whines.
Delphine smirks and raises her brow. She dips down as slowly as possible to kiss Cosima sweetly, waiting only a moment before sweeping her tongue over Cosima's lip. One moment more and she gently slips her hand down Cosima's stomach and under the hem of her sweatpants and underwear. Stretching her arm, she feels her fingers come in contact with the slick texture she's not used to feeling on anyone but herself. A discreet whimper escapes the smaller woman and provides Delphine ample energy to explore.
Aside from the angle, it's not much different than when she takes care of her own needs. There's still insecurity because of her inexperience, but the rest of her nerves are absent. She's sure it's not as enjoyable as it could be, her fingers picking up no real pattern or pressure, but that's not the objective. Trying her best to keep her hand in place, Delphine lures Cosima into a sitting, and then standing position, their kiss remaining connected for the whole transition. Delphine carefully steps forward, forcing Cosima to move back and does this until Cosima's back hits the wall next to her bed. When they're both still again, Delphine's hand moves with more purpose, every broken breath of Cosima's pushing her further.
Cosima's head spins and her brain feels numb. Seeing as Delphine probably hasn't had any kind of this experience in the past, Cosima figures her skill must come from personal gratification. Before she can ponder much farther into the matter, her head spinning comes to an abrupt halt with the retreating of Delphine's lips and ceasing movement of her fingers. She opens her eyes just as Delphine is pulling her hand from Cosima's pants.
"Told you it could be worse," she says with a grin, nodding towards her free hand. Cosima, out of breath and confused, sees Delphine holding her car keys. She must have swiped them from the nightstand while Cosima was distracted by her wiggling fingers.
Cosima stares for a second, not completely understanding, until she feels Delphine's warmth disappearing from the front of her body, walking backwards toward the front door with that same evil smirk. "Ugh, what?" She shouts, following the blonde. "You really can't go now. Don't tell me you aren't turned on, just a little," she desperately hopes the answer isn't silence and a smile.
Delphine turns back toward her, "Extremely," she says with a slight widening of her eyes, and then kisses Cosima once more. "But I have a husband I can go take it out on".
"That's so unfair," she pouts. But seeing Delphine's cocky expression makes her glare. "You know, you'll just be thinking of me the whole time," she warns, hoping it plants a seed in her head. Delphine turns and walks to the door, waiting until it's open and she has one foot outside before responding.
"No different than usual, then," she bites her lip briefly, purposefully, and closes the door behind her.