She had been acting very much like the warrior, in the alternate universe. She seemed unaffected by his touch; cold, withdrawn, distancing herself from him. All week he had been finding himself comparing his wife to the warrior he had met in another world-a woman who had stolen his heart, as if it was still there waiting for her.
The princess was loyal, and sweet; and Shrek admired that. She was supportive and nurturing. She was a fantastic mother. But in a world where they were in love, she had been ashamed to be an ogre; yet in a world where she didn't know him, she was proud of it.
Had he become disenchanted with her? He could still imagine her standing on that hilltop, hair flowing, eyes glinting. Lately the memory of her lethal attacks did more for him than the princess he married-a princess who kept everything tightly controlled; from her behavior, to her hair. And as a warrior, she took pride in who she was and didn't ask for anyone's approval. It hadn't bothered Shrek when he was in that world, but now it felt as though, perhaps, she had benefitted more in a world where they never met.
It was very unflattering. Now after all they had been through-after all they had been through that Fiona was aware of-she was here, actually trying not to touch him as they shared a blanket.
They had been on the road for three days, returning home; and she had been very quiet. At the kingdom he had practically begged her to tell him what was on her mind, and yet he had done most of the talking. His thoughts were whirling around in a messy vortex when suddenly he saw something that made him bring the carriage to an abrupt halt. Fiona looked mildly annoyed as he noisily let himself out with all the grace of a bull in a china shop. She peered curiously as he walked to the bushes, bent down and picked something up; and when he turned around she gasped in recognition.
Shrek turned away, trying to glimpse into the foliage. "Puss?"
There was no reply. Taking the hat with him, Shrek let himself back into the carriage.
Fiona took it from him, and Shrek gathered the reins. "Where's the rest of him?" she asked.
"I don't know."
"I knew something happened. I've had a bad feeling all week." Fiona began biting her nails.
Instead of trying to calm her down, Shrek let her worry; hoping it would give them something to discuss in length. But as the ride continued, Fiona regressed back into a state of silence, staring out the window and utterly ignoring her husband. Alternating between twiddling her thumbs, biting her nails, biting her lip, playing with her hair, tapping her fingers and sighing; it didn't take long for her antics to get on Shrek's last already frayed nerve. "Hey, would ya stop that?" he finally snapped.
She spared him a brief glance out of the corner of her eye, then tightly interlocked her fingers, sat up straight as a board and pointed her eyes to the view, shaking her head in quiet annoyance.
It took another tense hour before the waving greenery changed to mud and slime. Shrek inhaled, savoring the promise of home. But then the wind shifted and brought a nasty stench that had both ogres forgetting their feud.
"Ugh! I told you not to have the bean burrito!" Fiona exclaimed in disgust, as she wrinkled her nose and wafted fervently.
"I didn't make that!"
Fiona didn't look entirely convinced. Soon the carriage rolled through the forest, and Shrek slowed the horses down to a gradual stop as he and Fiona looked on in disbelief. The entire forest was black and barren. The trees had all fallen, and past their bare branches, they could see a pile of dark rubble where their home used to be.
Fiona put a shaking hand over her heart. Her eyes filled up with tears.
Shrek's eyes were dry, but wide as he took it all in, shaking his head in denial. He spluttered non-sense, unable to think beyond what he was seeing. Suddenly, startling Shrek and the horses, Fiona kicked the carriage door open, got out, and began to climb over the trees. Shrek let himself out and hastened to catch up to her. Fighting through branches, they stepped over countless felled trees before finally reaching the remains.
Shrek kneeled, picking up the pieces of what he thought had been furniture. "This can't be happening," he said shakily. "This can't be real. I-I-I've fallen asleep, or...or we went off a cliff and I'm in a coma..."
Knowing otherwise, Fiona dropped to her knees and wept. Hearing her passionate cries, Shrek deeply bowed his head and willed himself to wake up. But he couldn't.
Sensing Fiona's presence moving, Shrek opened his eyes. She was on her hands and knees, rummaging through the debris.
Suddenly Shrek knocked the black clumps out of her hands. "Why did you make us go? Why did you trust them?" he shouted. "I told you this was a bad idea! Someday you are going to have to start thinking of others!"
He got up and walked away, and Fiona sat frozen in the wreckage, blinking back tears. Fiercely wiping her cheeks, she finally surged unsteadily to her feet and looked around. Locating Shrek, she walked over to him. "Forget about that. We have got to find them."
"What makes you think there's anyone left to find? I don't even know what any of this is! For all I know, this-" He scooped up a pile of dust and let it trickle through his fingers "-was Dragon!"
Fiona's winter eyes narrowed dangerously. "Shrek," she said, in a dangerous tone. "If you're not even going to try...I don't want to be with you."
Unable to look away from the raw pain in her eyes, Shrek slowly stood up. Rendered speechless, he walked numbly after her as she fought her way back to the carriage.
Sitting down in the passenger seat, she slammed the door and picked up Puss' hat, clutching it closely and quelling her tears.
Hovering above the hut, Bananas turned in a circle and finally caught sight of an onion rolling through town. Angling his body, he flapped his wings harder and flew with purpose toward the ogres' unmistakable carriage. Catching the next thermal, he straightened out his wings and let it carry him. When he began to sink, he dipped further and continued flapping. Though quite young, he professionally swooped down and landed in the box of their carriage, causing his shadow to pass in front of Fiona. Both ogres flinched and turned to look at him.
"Hey! What are-what-what happened to the swamp?" Shrek demanded.
"Is everyone okay?" Fiona asked breathlessly.
"Umm..." Bananas folded his ears back. "Uh, almost everyone."
"Oh dear," Fiona murmured, and closed her eyes. "What happened?"
"I'm not...exactly sure. I was outside," Bananas admitted. "We're all going to...oh, what was it called?" he added helpfully, screwing up his face in concentration. "Um...oh, right, we're going to Far-cry's castle."
Fiona and Shrek looked at each other in realization.