Lamp Entertainment presents…

Chapter 9: Frosty the Snowgem

On Homeworld…

December 9th.

Yellow Diamond was annoyed like you wouldn't believe.

Scratch that, "annoyed" wasn't the right word. It was more like a cross between a sort of annoyed anger and utter bewilderment.

"Explain yourself," she said through gritted teeth. "What is this?"

Someone let the kindergarteners listen to Frosty the Snowman. Not a sentence that would fill most humans with a sense of impending terror. But these weren't humans. These were gem kindergarteners; Scientists whose expertise was in bringing inanimate rocks to life as gems. A bunch of bored scientists whose expertise was in bringing inanimate rocks to life as gems.

"This is Frosty!" the head kindergartener said proudly. She was a tall Era 1 Peridot that previously belonged to Yellow's own court. Peridot ST3-1N. From certain angles, if the light hit it right, you could spot a streak in her hair that looked a bit like a lightning bolt. "Frosty the Snowgem!"

She gestured enthusiastically towards the… thing. Several other kindergartener gems stood behind her, giving thumbs up.

The… creature was… well, it certainly was something that existed. It resembled what most people on Earth would call a snowman. Three large snowballs stacked on top of each other, the biggest one underneath and the smallest one on top. There was a large ice crystal sticking out of its "torso." Several pieces of gem technology were sticking out of it at various places as well. It had a pair of limb enhancer arms and two dark camera lenses for eyes. Its nose was a large red button that looked like it had been ripped straight from the console and jammed into the snow. It had a large Santa hat on its head. A few wires and a couple of sharp edges visible under the fabric hinted at some undoubtedly haphazardly constructed machinery underneath. The entire construct was floating about a centimeter over the ground on top of a small hover tray. Hover trays were usually used to hold tools or other things, but some gems had taken to using them for flying around with after that Crystal Gem Peridot's little show on her trash can lid.

The being was moving slowly, looking around with its dark camera eyes. It moved its floating arms and fingers, seemingly unaware of how to use them.

"How?" Yellow demanded.

"With science!" Peridot ST3-1N exclaimed.

"Science!" the other gems behind her called in unison.

"Care to elaborate?" You could have ground lesser diamonds to dust between Yellow's clenched teeth.

"Well, first we took some of your Diamond Essence…" Peridot ST3-1N started explaining.

"You what?" Yellow interrupted her.

"We took some of your Diamond Essence…"

"You stole it, is what you mean," Yellow corrected her.

"We stole some of your Diamond Essence and mixed it into some water which we froze to make an ice crystal," Peridot ST3-1N said without missing a beat. "Then we placed it in some cold water, added a few bits of technology, and boom! We have created new life!"

Yellow had to take several deep breaths to keep herself from poofing all of the beaming and proud-looking Peridots in front of her.

"Why?" she asked. "Why did you feel the need to create this… this thing?"

"His name is Frosty," Peridot ST3-1N said, missing the point by about seven lightyears.

"Besides, you Diamonds create life all the time," another gem, Peridot FR4N-K3N, said loudly. "So why can't we?" The other kindergarteners nodded in agreement.

"And, ah… so when you created this new life… was it really necessary to run around the entire building screaming 'It's alive! It's alive!' at the top of your lungs over and over again?" Yellow inquired calmly.

"Yes!" Peridot ST3-1N said. She wasn't joking.

A very long minute passed by as Yellow contemplated the best course of action.

"You know what?" she said finally. "Maybe I'm overreacting." She leaned down and looked "Frosty" in the camera eyes. "Hey. How's life so far?"

No response.

"Oh, right!" Peridot ST3-1N said. She hurried up to Frosty and stuck something that might've looked a bit like a pipe to an Earthling into the snowgem's face. "The translator," she explained. She smiled at her creation. "Hello Frosty. Welcome to life."

"Li-liiiife," Frosty mumbled. Its voice was slightly mechanical and cold. Fitting, Yellow supposed. Peridot ST3-1N clapped her hands excitedly.

"You can speak!" she exclaimed. "Good work, Frosty, mommy is so proud of you!" Behind her, the other kindergarteners joined in her excited hand clapping. They were so proud of their baby!

"Speeeaaak?" Frosty said. "Mo-mom…?"

"Say 'mama!'" Peridot ST3-1N said. "Can you say 'mama?'"

"Mama?" Frosty said.

The group of kindergarteners practically exploded witch excited squees and chatter. Several of them were jumping up and down and clapping their hands.

"Very good, Frosty!" Peridot ST3-1N said. "Do you know who mama is? Can you point to mama?"

Frosty slowly raised one of its… his arms. A shaky finger hovered in the air for a moment, indecisive, before finally pointing at Peridot ST3-1N.

"That's right!" Peridot ST3-1N said. "I'm your mama!"

"Wait a minute!" Peridot FR4N-K3N yelled. Suddenly, the group of kindergartener gems seemed a lot less excited than they had only moments before. "I'm his mama too!"

A shouting match erupted faster than most volcanoes.

"I'm his mama too!"

"Me too!"

"No way, I'm his true mama! I made his gem!"

"So what? I made his body!"

"I stole the Diamond Essence and the gem shard dust! Without me, there'd be no Frosty! I'm his true mama!"

"I gave him his hat!"

"Big deal! I gave him his limb enhancers and his eyes!"

While the kindergarten gems were busy shouting at each other, their baby stood on the floor, utterly confused. For the first time in his short life, he felt sadness. There was a small spark behind his camera eyes and a few snowflakes melted into a tear that rolled down his face. It froze quickly again.

"Tsk, tsk, tsk," Yellow tutted. She reached out towards Frosty and let him jump into her hand.

"Frosty…" he mumbled through his translator. "Frosty… I… don't like… when mamas fight."

"There, there," Yellow said and patted the snowgem's head, very, very carefully. "Granny Yellow will make them stop."

She cleared her throat.

"SHUT IT!" she yelled, making the entire building shake with nothing but her voice. The kindergarten gems all froze in place. FR4N-K3N and ST3-1N were lying on the floor, wrestling with each other. Needless to say, they all shut it.

"Is this really the extent of your Christmas spirit?" Yellow chastised them. "This is supposed to be a time for generosity, family, and love. Yet here you are. You have just created a new being together, new life. And the first thing you do in front of your baby's eyes is fight. Pathetic." The kindergarten gems all looked down at the floor in shame.

"Now, you better get your shit together," Yellow said. "You're all gonna have to share custody of Frosty. If you behave yourself, you can all celebrate Christmas together with Frosty. But if you're incapable of acting like civilized gems, we'll have to find another arrangement. So what's it gonna be?"

There was silence for a few moments before some of the kindergartener gems started mumbling apologies to each other.

"Sorry I hit you."

"Sorry I called you a clod."

"I'm sorry I said you weren't really Frosty's mama."

"Maybe…" Peridot ST3-1N said slowly. "Maybe… Frosty can have more than one mama?"

"Yes…" Peridot FR4N-K3N said. "Perhaps… we can all be Frosty's mama?"

"Yeah… that'd be nice," Peridot ST3-1N agreed. "Well, only if he wants us to be…"

The group of kindergartener gems looked up at Frosty where he stood in Yellow's hand.'

"What do you say, Frosty?" Yellow asked the snowgem. "Do you wanna give them a chance?"

Frosty nodded.

"If you say so," Yellow said. "But be sure to call me if they start fighting again, okay?"

"Yes, granny Yellow," Frosty said.

Yellow let him down back on the floor. He stood by her feet for a few moments. He and the group of kindergarteners both looked unsure of what to do now.

"Hey Frosty," said Peridot 1G-OR. She held out her arms. "Do you wanna give us a hug?"

Frosty nodded and started moving towards them, clumsily floating on top of his hover tray. He was embraced by about a dozen gems all at once.

"Well, that just happened," Yellow muttered to herself. "I'll leave you to it," she said out loud to the very strange family in front of her. "Good luck when he reaches his rebellious years. I hope it goes better for you than it did for us Diamonds." Nothing like a little dark humor to wash away the sweet taste in her mouth.

No one responded, so Yellow decided to withdraw. Hopefully, the strange family would find some way to make it work. Had she been her normal cynical self, Yellow would've scoffed at the thought. Things rarely worked out as well as you wanted them to. But for some reason… a feeling in her gut area… Yellow felt like it might really work out.

Yellow shook her head in disbelief. Only during Christmas. Only during Christmas.

AUTHOR'S NOTES

This is one of those ideas that I got while working and jotted down on a piece of cardboard. Really, it was just the name of the chapter and the "someone let the kindergarteners listen to Frosty the Snowman."