A/N: Well, Chapter 17 was a big party. You know what that means, don't you? This chapter is the after-party. The grim task of cleaning up. You know how it goes. Crushed taco chips all over the floor. Water stains on the coffee table. Seven-layer dip ground into the carpet. Salsa dripped all over the couch. An endless army of solo cups partially filled with who-knows-what. Stale beer and body odor stench permeating the air. Something in the kitchen trash can has achieved sentience and is trying to escape from said can, along with its gag inducing smell. And, good God, what did they do in the downstairs bathroom? You don't even want to know. All of that with Patton's Third Army marching around inside your head. So, please remind me, why did we have that party in the first place? This is a work of fiction. I have no personal knowledge of any such party at any time in my life.

Disclaimer: Well, my first two New Year's resolutions (wishes) have failed. I don't own Chuck and I make no money from Chuck. Let's hope the rest of my resolutions don't suffer a similar fate (Ed. – Too late. Writer's block arrived along with the new year. Things are not looking good for my resolutions this year (so what else is new?)).

Chapter 18 – Wait It Out

November 11

"That's great, Sarah!" Chuck exclaimed. "You must be so happy! I knew you'd get in. Never doubted it for a second," he smiled warmly at her, his eyes dancing with happiness.

"That makes one of us," Sarah chuckled, waving off the protest forming on Chuck's lips. He might have never doubted her, but she sure did. Now that was all over. His reaction pleased her to no end and she felt the warmth growing in her chest. Even her fingers and toes were tingling. "Anyway, I guess you're going to be stuck with me for another three years," she grinned at him. His smile back to her threatened to turn her knees to jelly.

After Zondra had brought the rest of the girls back into the room, Chuck and the CATS had quickly repeated his story to bring them all up to speed. As Carina had feared, Beca had snorted and shaken her head when they learned that Chuck had known they were following him around campus and wondered why they didn't just ask him what he was doing. They should have listened to me after all, she'd said to herself. For their part, the underclass Songbirds were equally stunned to learn Chuck's full story. There had been another round of foreign language tests, impressing all of them, including the CATS. They suspected he knew more languages than they were able to test him on, but they wisely refrained from pushing him about them.

They were all saddened to learn about his lonely childhood, bereft of friends, apart from Morgan. Alex's heart had swelled at the thought of how great a friend Morgan was. How great a guy. She knew she was lucky to have him. He had some kisses coming his way in the near future. A lot of them, in fact. After the revelation of Chuck's spotty dating history and lack of experience, Alex had been surprised, but pleased, that Morgan didn't take a backseat to Chuck in that regard.

The reality of it was, Chuck had told them so much that it was going to take them a while to process all of it. He'd told them that he'd answer any other questions they came up with. In fact, he'd looked relieved.

Now, Sarah had just told Chuck her news about getting acceptances for three of her applications to physical therapy schools, including Stanford. His happiness reflected her own and amplified it. The air around them was buzzing with electricity. The rest of the girls felt it, too.

"Gag me," Carina whispered in Zondra's ear. "Are you ready for three more years of these two and their nauseating antics?" Zondra snorted, but when she looked at Carina, she could see that the redhead was smiling.

"Yeah, I am," Zondra admitted. "They both deserve a chance for some happiness. And it's obvious that each of them makes the other happy. I plan on doing everything I can to help."

"Oh, well," Carina grumped. "I guess that means I'll have to help, too." The two friends looked at each other and giggled.

Amy wandered over and commented, "The next three years are going to be interesting. You'll have to keep me up to date when I'm out there slaving away in the real world." Her two rolled their eyes, but all three shared knowing smiles.

"I've got to get to practice soon," Chuck mentioned to Sarah. "Is it OK for me to show you what I brought and give you your presents?" He looked at her hopefully.

Sarah smiled shyly. "Of course, you can, Chuck. But you really didn't have to do anything for me for my birthday, you know."

Chuck looked at her with mock horror. "Sarah, how can you say that after the wonderful birthday surprise y'all gave me last week? That was the best birthday that I've ever had," he blushed. "I might not have your singing talents or dance moves, but I had to do something for you. Come with me." He reached over and took her hand in order to lead her over to the desk where he'd left his surprises. They each felt the charge and snap when their hands met. After a few seconds of staring at their joined hands and then at each other, Sarah permitted Chuck to lead her where he wanted. When they arrived, their hands parted, reluctantly, it appeared to the observant singers. Chuck opened the bag and pulled out the CDs. Turning back toward Sarah, he held them up for her, and the rest of the girls, to see.

"I made these CDs for you. If you don't have a way to listen to the CDs, I have all of the song files and can load them on your phone or wherever else you want," Chuck offered. Sarah just smiled at him, her eyes shining. "There's two of light classical music and two of light jazz. No voices. Just instrumental," he said, handing them to her.

"Is this the music that you listen to when you're studying?" Sarah asked softly, taking the discs.

"Some of it, yeah," he nodded.

"So, when I listen to them, I'll learn even more about you, won't I?" She bit her lower lip and looked at him through her lashes.

A slow smile spread across his face. "I hadn't thought of that, but yeah, I guess you will learn more about me. In a way."

"Thank you, Chuck. They're wonderful. I can't wait to listen to them," Sarah smiled, then looked him straight in the eye. "I know I'll like them." Chuck's face wore a happy grin, but he missed the look in her eye and failed to grasp the significance of the extra emphasis she put into her comment. She pointed to the last CD in his hand. "What's that one?"

Chuck's grin grew wider. "This last one had zydeco music on it. Creole music from Louisiana," he said, handing her the final CD.

"Do you study to that music, too?" Sarah's eyes widened.

Chuck laughed, "Oh no, that is definitely not studying music." He shook his head. "No, that is kick back and relax music. Or get up and dance music, if you want to. Maybe, eat some food. Music to have fun to. Good food, good people, good music. Good times."

Sarah turned the CD over in her hands, opened it, and looked at the list of songs he'd neatly printed on the inside of the front cover. Looking at him again, she spoke. "So, more music that you like that'll teach me more about you." It was a statement, not a question. He ducked his head, but smiled and nodded, when he realized she'd mentioned learning more about him twice now.

"Thank you, Chuck. Thank you for taking the time to pick out these songs and make these CDs for me, " Sarah enthused. She pointed at the box. "What's in there?"

"Oh, that might be the best surprise of all, because everyone gets to share in it," Chuck said with a flourish, spreading his arms theatrically. He picked up the box and opened the lid, so Sarah could see. "It's a double chocolate cake with black velvet icing." The chocolate was so intense Sarah could smell it as soon as he opened the box, so could the rest of the girls. A collective groan went up from the gathered Songbirds. Before they could react further, Chuck turned back to the desk and took the cake out of the box. He opened the bag and took out the plates, forks, napkins, and the cake cutter. With everything in readiness, he cut the cake into thirteen perfect slices and began to slide cake slices onto the paper plates. After adding a fork and a napkin, he handed the first slice to Sarah and proceeded to repeat the process to the other eleven girls, saving the last piece for himself. Picking up his plate, he turned back to Sarah.

"Happy birthday, Sarah. May this next year bring you nothing but happiness and success." He noticed that all of the girls were waiting on him. Blushing, he said, "Dig in, please. Let me know what you think." The only responses he got were groans and moans, which, if he'd been another person, would have embarrassed him, but since he didn't have the context, he merely beamed at their reactions.

"Oh my God, Chuck. Where did you get this cake?" Sarah exclaimed.

"Well, I got some help from Ellie," Chuck shrugged.

"I take back everything I said before. I love your sister," she gave him a chocolate grin. Murmurs of agreement were heard around the room. The only other noises were the sounds of plastic forks on paper plates and appreciation from the girls.

When the plates had been scraped as clean as possible and all traces of chocolate removed from the forks, Chuck went around with the waste can collecting everyone's trash. Putting the can down, he ducked into the men's room to wash his hands. Checking his phone, he knew it was time for him to go.

"I've got to run or I'll be late for practice," Chuck announced apologetically. "I'm sorry that I took up all of your practice time today," he said as he looked around at the girls sheepishly. He picked up his backpack and moved toward the door. Sarah followed close behind. He stopped and turned toward her, again, when she spoke.

"Don't worry about it," Sarah said, waving her hand in a brush-off motion. "One day won't hurt us one way or the other. Besides, you needed to tell us what you told us and we needed to hear it." While they were talking, the CATS split up with Carina moving to the right a bit behind Chuck, so she could watch Sarah's face. Amy and Zondra moved a bit farther left to do the same with Chuck's. He put his backpack down on the floor.

"Thank you, Sarah. Truly. I'm glad I told you all of that stuff," Chuck said sincerely. "I hope you enjoy the music and I'm glad you liked the cake. Happy belated birthday, again." He finished speaking and fidgeted awkwardly. Sarah tried to hide her amusement, but quickly took pity on him.

"Is there something wrong, Chuck?" she asked softly.

"Yeah… Uh… yeah, there is. I don't know what to do," he shrugged. Sarah gestured for him to continue. "You're my friend and … um … I haven't been to … ah … to too many birthday parties or anything. Especially not since I was a little kid. And those were boy parties. I've never been to a boy/girl party before." Sarah worked hard to keep the shock from showing on her face. "I guess I should call those co-ed parties now. Since I am nineteen at this point." Chuck shoved his hands in his pockets and looked down at his feet. "What do you … ah … do when you leave a party? Just leave? Shake hands? Or something else? I don't know," he looked back up at Sarah and she could see that his face was reddening with embarrassment. She felt a strange mix of warmth in her chest and a pang of sadness from her realization of the source of his embarrassment.

Sarah blew out a breath. "Well, you could give me a hug," she offered. "If you want to, that is." She was so totally focused on Chuck that she didn't notice Carina and Zondra pull out their phones and begin to record her discussion with Chuck. They weren't close enough to hear clearly what they were saying to each other, but they could read their body language just fine.

When Chuck processed what she had just said, he stilled and took his hands out of his pockets. A shy smile sprouted on his face. "Yeah, I'd like to give you a hug." Sarah smiled back at him. Before he could think any more about it, he stepped toward her and enveloped her in a tight hug. There was an immediate crackle of electricity that left Sarah stunned. It felt like he was a drowning man and she was a rescue float that he was holding onto for dear life. Slowly, her arms encircled his torso and she hugged him back with everything she had. To the surrounding girls, they seemed to melt into each other. The looks on each of their faces were both wonderful and painful to watch.

After a few moments, Chuck came back to himself. "What is the proper length of time to hold a 'happy birthday, friend, but I've got to go' hug?" he murmured into Sarah's ear. She shivered at the touch and movement of his lips and the warm breath that tickled across her ear and down the back of her neck. She swallowed nervously.

"Probably, a shorter time than we've already been hugging," Sarah admitted. Chuck released her and stepped back. She had to struggle to keep the pout off of her face.

"I'd better go," Chuck smiled crookedly at her. Picking up his backpack, once again, he half turned to the girls behind them and waved. "Bye, y'all. See you after a while at dinner." Facing back to the door, he opened it and stepped out. Before the door could close, he looked back at Sarah and mouthed 'Bye' to her. The door shut and Amy ran over and waited for a few seconds, then she slowly pulled the door open and looked out. Chuck was jogging away in the middle distance across White Memorial Plaza. He looked like he was talking on his cell phone as he ran. She shut the door and gave the all-clear signal.

Every girl in the room, apart from the CATS, yelled, "HOLY SHIT!", at the same time. Sarah stood silently staring at the closed door, tears glistening in her eyes, her hands held up to her mouth as if she was praying. She'd never been hugged with such aching need in her life before. The last twenty-four hours had been like riding a roller coaster in the middle of a tornado. It would take her a long time to process everything that had occurred and everything that Chuck had told her. Everything that she felt. She pulled out her phone and texted Ellie. 'Chuck told me his story. It's a lot to process. I might need to talk to you later, is that OK?' A few seconds later, she received a reply. 'Sure. Anytime.' Putting her phone away, she heard her name being called. She turned and her roommates walked up to her.

"You need to see this," Zondra said as she held up her phone. Carina was right beside her with her own phone. What the hell?

Chuck was jogging across campus toward the baseball field, but his mind was focused back in the practice hall and everything that had transpired from the moment he propped the door open and entered all the way to him hugging Sarah and leaving. He'd told them a lot. Not everything, but he wasn't hiding anything now, he'd just run out of time and they'd not thought to ask him some questions. Besides, he hadn't really volunteered to continue, because he was more interested in giving Sarah her birthday surprises.

Chuck felt both lighter and more at ease, now that they knew the truth about him, but somewhat tense and uncertain about how they would deal with that knowledge once they had time to process all of it. On top of that, he was worried because he knew that the clock was now ticking on him talking to his baseball teammates and he had no idea how to broach the subject with them. Maybe he'd talk with Coach Graham about it after practice today and see if he had any advice that could help him. He also needed to let his family know before word trickled back to them via their Stanford grapevine.

Suddenly, he saw the 'Twilight Bark gossip chain' scene from the One Hundred and One Dalmatians cartoon in his head. He barked out a laugh as he ran, garnering him some amused looks from the people he passed. Figuring the best defense was a good offense, he fished out his phone and asked the voice assistant to 'call Ellie'. His sister must have had her phone right at hand since she answered on the first ring.

"I told them, El," he said, without preamble.

"And hello to you, too," Ellie replied. "You told who what?"

"I told Sarah and the other Songbirds my story."

"What!? When did this happen? How?" Ellie was getting excited.

"Just now at their practice. It took a while. Sarah kind of demanded I talk to her." Good for her, Ellie thought. Finally.

"I need details, little brother. Details!"

"I know, El. I know. But I can't now. I'm on my way to practice."

Ellie snorted. "I couldn't tell."

"HA! Pfft! Talk to you later? OK?"

"I'm expecting a call. Don't let me down, Chuck."

"I won't. Gotta go. Bye!" He disconnected without waiting on her to respond and continued to run toward his practice and disappointment.

"Bye!" Ellie said to the dead connection. Rude, she thought. Just then, her phone vibrated with an incoming text. It was from Sarah Walker.

'Chuck told me his story. It's a lot to process. I might need to talk to you later, is that OK?'

Ellie replied automatically. 'Sure. Anytime.' After sending the message, she immediately dialed another number. "Mom! Guess what!"

When Devon entered the apartment, he saw Ellie on her phone. She looked like she was vibrating with excitement. Her teary eyes found him at the same moment she ended her call. Thinking quickly, he managed to cover his ears before her squeal began. It would be a while before he learned the reason behind Ellie's reaction.

And so, it was that Chuck, himself, unknowingly, alerted the Stanford grapevine. After Ellie called Mary, Mary turned around and called Stephen. While he was calling Langston Graham, Mary called Diane Beckman who, in turn, passed the word on to Roan Montgomery. The news would reach other ears as time went on, but the universal response was "It's about damn time." There was a common question that followed that response. With the burden of keeping his life secret lifting from his mind, what would Chuck Bartowski be able to accomplish now?

"What are you talking about, Z?" Sarah asked, as her suitemates surrounded her. She gestured toward the phone Zondra was holding in her hand.

"You need to look at this video I just took," Zondra commented, putting her phone in Sarah's hand as she spoke.

"Why were you taking a video of me talking with Chuck?" Sarah challenged.

"Just look at it, please? Then, if you want, you can yell at me," Zondra offered.

Sarah snorted and shook her head, then she pressed 'play'. The video showed her conversation with Chuck just now. She couldn't see her face, but she sure could see his. The sound was muted due to the distance between where Zondra had been standing recording them and where they had been talking. She saw him mouth the words 'Yeah, I'd like to give you a hug' and then step toward her and wrap his arms around her, followed by her, slowly, hugging him back. All of this she already knew from having just experienced it. What she wasn't ready for was the expression on Chuck's face while he was hugging her. He wore such a pained expression that it seemed he would have had to be feeling it physically, but as the hug went on, his expression changed. Bit by bit, his pained expression smoothed out and softened into one of quiet contentment. Sarah was surprised. Pleased, but saddened even more at his reaction to their hug. She was blinking back tears when she handed the phone back to Zondra.

"Now take a look at my video," Carina demanded softly.

Sarah took Carina's phone and watched the second video. This one showed her conversation and hug with Chuck from her perspective. She watched her reactions to what Chuck was saying and her face when he hugged her. During the hug, she saw her face change from a look of shy happiness to one of painful realization. She gave Carina her phone back and the tears, she'd been fighting, began to slide down her cheeks.

"He's the little match girl," she whispered.

"What?" Carina asked.

Louder. "The little match girl," Sarah said. "He's totally aware of what he's missing. He's standing in the cold freezing to death as he sees the joy and happiness others are experiencing. Things he can never have." Her crying intensified.

"What did he tell you before he hugged you?" Amy asked. "He seemed uncertain and hesitant."

Sarah began to sob. "He … He didn't know what to … to do. How to l—leave a party," she choked out. "He even called it a boy/girl party. Then he corrected himself." Sarah took control and forced herself to stop crying. "He'd never been to a co-ed party before. Hadn't even been to a birthday party since he was a kid. A little kid, at that." She put her hand to her forehead. Her eyes widened as she looked at her friends. "I didn't get it. I didn't understand, at first. When he told us before? Oh my God!" Her hand moved from her forehead to cover her mouth in astonishment. Sarah looked around at the other girls. Her eyes widened even further and she put both of her hands on her head. "Ohmygod! Ohmygod! Ohmygod! OHMYGOD! OH! MY! GOD!" she shouted.

"WHAT?" Carina yelled back. Sarah stood there speechless for a few seconds.

"What is it, Sarah?" Zondra asked, putting her hand on Sarah's shoulder. That seemed to break her out of her trance.

"I don't think he's ever been hugged before," Sarah said, stunned.

"Oh, come on, Blondie! What are you talking about?" Carina demanded.

"I mean it," Sarah confirmed. "I don't think he's ever been hugged like that ever before. Family? Sure. Guys hugging him, like after a baseball game or a swimming race or swim meet victory? Yeah. Maybe even a few perfunctory hugs from other people here and there. Friendship hugs like the ones we've given him this fall? Of course. But a hug with a girl? A hug with emotions? A hug with someone who likes him? Any kind of affection or attraction? Nope! Never," Sarah spoke with conviction. She looked around and saw the skeptical looks she was getting from the singers. "I'm not kidding. Think about it. You saw his face. How he reacted during our hug. I'm right. I know it." The girls all quieted and thought about what he'd told them, what they'd witnessed a few moments previously, and what Sarah had just said. It wasn't long before girls began to nod. More and more of them, each passing second.

"You could be right, Blondie. You could be right," Carina admitted. "The question is, what do we do about it?"

Sarah shrugged, "I'm not sure." She looked around at the rest of the group, but didn't see anyone offering an answer.

Amy piped up. "Don't do anything different. Just keep doing what we've been doing." She looked around the room, too. "Be his friends. Treat him the way we've been treating him. Like a human being. A human being that we like having around." Her eyes held Sarah's gaze. "The question is, Sarah, what are you going to do about it?" Amy smirked. "After all, you're the one who just admitted you liked him. Again." No one had missed what Sarah had said earlier. Or how she had said it.

Sarah blushed. "Bite me."

"You should have told him that before he left, Blondie," Carina grinned. "He might have obliged you." Sarah's blush intensified.

"More likely that his head would have exploded," Zondra chimed in. "Either that or he might have bitten you for real." Chuckles could be heard around the room.

Sarah's face fell and she glared at her friends. "Don't say that." She looked around the room. "Don't say that again. Ever. It's not his fault he doesn't know those things. He can't help the way he is. He didn't ask for any of it. You say, be his friends. Fine. Be his friends and don't make him the butt of your jokes." There were tears in her eyes. Whether they were tears of anger or sadness they didn't know. Neither did she.

"You're right, Sarah. Sorry about that. You know that I didn't mean anything by it," Zondra was contrite.

"Yeah, I'm sorry too, Blondie," Carina said.

"Sorry, Sarah," Amy joined in.

"Yeah, I'm sorry, too. Sorry for biting your heads off. It's just a lot. You know?" Sarah admitted and her friends nodded. She spoke louder. "OK, on that note. Let's call it a day and come back tomorrow ready to get back to practice. We'll see you guys later at dinner." Sarah walked over to gather her things. "Whew! What a day!" That elicited chuckles and agreement from many of the Songbirds while they were picking up their own purses and bags and heading out the door.

The CATS were subdued during their walk back to the dorm, each of them thinking about what Chuck had told them. They were all trying to reconcile the new things they knew about him with the image they'd had of him before. The funny, awkward, caring, smart guy (who looked great in a small, tight swimsuit) that they'd come to know. And like a lot. Or love, in one person's case, at least. If she would just admit it to herself, since the rest of them could see it plain as day. When they arrived back at the dorm, Sarah announced that she was going to take a walk. She changed into leggings and a tee-shirt over a sports bra. Putting on her running shoes, she picked up her phone and earphones, along with her room key and wallet with her student id. She filled her water bottle from the sink and began to walk out of the room.

"You sure you don't want some company?" Carina asked. "You know, to keep an eye out for nefarious pinecones?" She laughed when Sarah frowned and gave her the finger.

"Nah, I'm good. Probably, won't actually run. More likely that I'll power walk a bit. Just to be safe. Build back up to running over the next few days." She looked at her fellow CATS. "I'll see you later." With that Sarah left the room and closed the door behind her. As soon as she was out of sight and earshot of her roommates, she called Ellie.

"Hi Ellie, it's Sarah. Do you have time to talk?" she said.

"Hi Sarah. Sure, I do. Do you want to do it over the phone or meet someplace?" Ellie replied.

"Could we meet and go someplace and talk? I've got about an hour or so before I need to get back and get ready for dinner with my friends, including Chuck."

Ellie smiled when she heard what Sarah had said. "Sure. I'll come get you. Where are you?"

"I'll be at the intersection of Santa Teresa Street and Governor's Avenue in just a few minutes."

"OK, I'm grabbing my keys and leaving now. See you in a few. Bye."

"Yeah, see you soon. Bye, Ellie." Sarah ended the call and walked out of the front of Roble Hall. When she reached the street, she turned left in the direction of Governor's Avenue. While she walked, she thought about what she wanted to talk to Ellie about. Back in the dorm, her three suitemates were talking.

"Why do you think she didn't want us to tag along with her on her walk?" Amy asked. "We could have talked about all of the stuff Chuck told us."

"Sometimes I don't understand her at all," Carina grumped.

When Zondra didn't immediately chime in to the conversation, Amy and Carina looked at her. She was squinting her eyes and tapping a finger on her pursed lips, deep in thought.

"Did any of you notice what Sarah was doing right after Chuck left and we were walking up to her to show her the videos we'd shot of them hugging?" The other two girls shook their heads. "Didn't either of you see her texting someone?" Again, two headshakes.

"Who would she have been texting at that particular moment, anyway?" Amy asked. The three friends were silent for a moment.

"Ellie!" Carina exclaimed. "I bet she was texting Ellie." Her eyebrows almost reached her hairline when her eyes flew open in realization. Zondra was right there with her.

"Son of a bitch!" Zondra groused. "She did it again. She's not going to run, walk, or crawl anywhere. She's going to go talk with Ellie. The little sneak." She twisted her lips to the side and shook her head. "She'd make a good spy."

Carina snorted. "Pfft. No, she wouldn't. She can't keep a straight face around us where Chuck is concerned. How could she ever be a spy? They have to keep all of their emotions bottled up and have the best poker faces in the world. Sarah can't do any of that. She'd make a terrible spy."

"Maybe so, but that 'terrible spy' put one over on us anyway," Amy observed.

"Yeah, well, we'd make worse spies than her, apparently," Zondra commented.

"Besides, we're too damn good looking to be spies. We always make an entrance and nobody forgets us," Carina said. "You can't be very good spies if you stand out in people's memories like we do," Carina laughed. Zondra and Amy soon added their laughter to hers.

Sarah only had to wait a few minutes until Ellie pulled up on her side of Santa Teresa Street. She hopped in the car and Ellie pulled away, even as she was still fastening her seatbelt.

"Why don't we head up to Starbucks at the Stanford Shopping Center? It's not too far and we can both grab something to drink while we talk." Ellie suggested.

"That sounds great, Ellie. Thanks," Sarah said gratefully.

"How's the ankle holding up? Everything OK?"

"Yeah, it's doing great. I'm walking more and still doing the exercises they gave me to strengthen it. I'm doing a little power walking and plan on starting to jog a little in the next few days. Then work up to running."

"What you need to do is practice looking for pinecones. And, maybe, rocks, too." Ellie teased, guiding the car north through Stanford's campus, before turning on to Quarry Road and heading toward the shopping center.

Sarah snorted. "Gee. Thanks. Why didn't I think of that?" She retorted, sticking out her tongue.

Ellie laughed, before turning serious. "Are you OK? Did Chuck freak you out too much?" She glanced over at Sarah as she spoke to try and gauge her reaction.

"Oh, Ellie! I don't know where to start. It was amazing and terrible. Wonderful and heartbreaking. All at the same time," Sarah's eyes looked like saucers when she looked over at the brunette. "I can't imagine what it must be like inside his head. What he has to do to even function day by day. What he goes through." She shook her head. "Then he does all of those amazing things. He does so much. All at once. Then the baseball stuff. And the swimming."

"You've seen him swimming?" Ellie asked as she glanced at Sarah. "In one of those racing suits of his?" Sarah couldn't keep from blushing and Ellie noticed. "Uh huh. That would be a yes on the suit." Ellie grinned cheekily at the younger woman. "Not bad, huh?"

"Ellie! He's your brother!"

"I know that. So what? I may be his sister, but I'm not blind. He's a good-looking guy. In very good shape, too. All of those brains in a very nice package. With a very nice package."

"Ellie!" Sarah sputtered, while Ellie laughed. "I can't believe that you're perving on your brother. Your little brother."

"There's nothing little about Chuck, Sarah," Ellie chuckled at Sarah's discomfort. "And I'm not perving on him. It's just that he'll make some lucky girl very happy someday. That's all I'm saying," she shrugged, but also noticed the secret smile on Sarah's face before she schooled her features once more. "I've got my guy and I'm happy. He gives me all I can handle. In all sorts of ways. Sooner or later Chuck will find his girl." She eyed Sarah as she was speaking. "At least, I hope so. He deserves it, if anyone does." By this time, they'd arrived at the shopping center. The conversation lagged while Ellie found a spot. They got out and Ellie locked the car, before joining Sarah to walk over to the Starbucks. They got their orders and went back outside to find a table where they could talk. It was a nice day, but there were some tables available. They chose one that was a bit removed from the others and would give them some privacy for their talk. Taking their seats, each sipped their drinks.

"He and I had a terrible relationship when we were younger," Ellie confessed. "If I'm being honest, it wasn't until we both got up here that it began to really improve. We've come a long way in only a few weeks."

"What changed, if you don't mind my asking?" Sarah asked.

"No. I don't mind you asking, at all. I think what changed is we're around each other finally. And talking with each other. After each of us has grown up some. My graduating high school and going through college showed me what he was doing. How much of a challenge it was. And he did it at a very young age. With no friends. I grew up past my jealousy and began to see things from his point of view. Put myself in his shoes, so to speak. Then I felt awful. His life was shit. And I hadn't helped. At all. For a long time. And you know what he did?" Sarah shook her head. "The big jerk forgave me. Told me that we were immature kids back then who did and said stupid things to each other. Asked me to forgive him for being a brat." Elie shook her head in disbelief. "What an asshole," she chuckled.

"Such an asshole," Sarah agreed, grinning. Both women started laughing.

Ellie sobered. "So, tell me what happened. What did he tell you?"

Sarah blew out a breath. "Whew! Where to begin?" Ellie smiled her encouragement. "I guess the place to start was yesterday, my birthday." She proceeded to recap the discoveries that had occurred the previous day that led them … her … to confront Chuck a few hours ago. Ellie frowned at Sarah's description of how they cornered Chuck figuratively and his breakdown. She put a hand on Sarah's arm when she faltered in her story, letting the younger woman know that she was OK and wished for her to continue with her tale. Sarah described everything Chuck had told them … her, all the way through his cutting the discussion short in order to give her the presents and cake he'd gotten for her birthday. How thoughtful he was for making the CDs for her and bringing such a delicious dessert for everyone to share. "Thanks for helping Chuck with that cake, Ellie. It was a big hit with everyone."

Ellie smirked and nodded. "Yeah, I helped Chuck with that."

"I'd love to get the recipe, if I could," Sarah said.

"No problem. I'm sure Chuck and I can make that happen," Ellie replied. "Now, what else happened?"

"Well, I did tell him about getting acceptance letters from three of the PT schools I'd applied to, including Stanford. He was very happy for me, although he told me he knew I'd get in, because he had faith in me. When I told him that I intended to go here to Stanford, he gave me a huge smile. I guess he was happy to hear I'd be in school with him for three more years." Sarah blushed at the memory.

"I just bet he was. Congratulations, by the way," Ellie grinned at her. "Anything else happen?"

Sarah thanked the older woman and went on to describe him trying to leave and their good-bye/thank you hug. Ellie listened to her 'little match girl' theory and about the videos her roommates had taken. Then she interrupted.

"I'm not sure if his description of himself as the 'boy in the bubble' or your 'little match girl' is more accurate," Ellie commented. Sarah looked at her in confusion. "I do think that you're right about him getting hugs from girls. Or not, as the case may be. Affectionate hugs, that is. But, I'm not sure he really knows what those emotions are." Sarah was staring at her. "He definitely has emotions. Strong emotions. Underneath all of those brains, he is human, you know." Sarah snorted. "But Chuck doesn't have the context, the framework, to fully understand them. I'm pretty sure he's had crushes before and some of what you've told me kind of confirms that for me. Chuck likes people. He knows that much, but beyond that? I don't know. It could be uncharted territory for him. Most likely is. He's dealing with not having any of this in his life up to now and now being exposed to all of it. It's the farthest thing from the math, programming, and engineering that he's so knowledgeable about. And comfortable with. It's going to take him time to process it."

"It sounds like you've talked to your mom about Chuck and this stuff before."

"Oh, yeah. That's for sure." Ellie admitted. "The other issue, for Chuck, is how do all of these emotions work inside that brain of his. How does his having hyperthymesia affect his emotions and vice versa?"

"What are you saying, Ellie?" Sarah asked, apprehensively.

"I'm saying that it might take him some time to learn how to deal with all of that …" Ellie paused.

"Are you saying deal with all of his emotions in light of his headaches and 'episodes' from hyperthymesia? Do you think he's afraid of what those kinds of emotions may do to his brain?" Sarah asked, before hurriedly speaking again. "Maybe not afraid, but worried? Concerned?"

"Yeah, that's sort of what I'm saying," Ellie shrugged. "He's a scientist. He's going to test everything out from every angle. Go slow. Be safe. It's almost an experiment, except that he's both the observer and the test subject. And he knows what the consequences are if he makes a mistake or fails somehow. Those episodes of his," she shuddered, before opening her eyes and looking pointedly at the younger blonde woman.

"You're giving me a look, Ellie. Why?"

"Sarah, come on. You have feelings for my brother," Ellie gazed at her softly. "You like him. Maybe more than like him. I could tell that the first time I met you and we talked on the way back to your dorm after we dealt with your sprained ankle. I can see it on your face right now. Your body language. I heard it in your voice when you were telling me what happened yesterday and today." Sarah started to protest, but the older woman held up her hand. "Don't worry. I think it's great. You seem like a wonderful girl. Chuck likes you. I'm sure of it. Maybe even likes you a lot. He's changing since he came up here. Part of the reason for that change is you."

Sarah looked at Ellie with a shy smile. "I do like him. A lot." She blushed. "I can't believe I'm saying it out loud and to his sister, no less." Ellie chuckled. "What do I do? What does he need from me?"

Ellie thought for a minute. "He needs you, Sarah. It may take a while. He's got a lot to learn and process. A lot to understand. You already know that he'll do absolutely anything for you. He's proven that. Be with him. Talk to him. Let him know that you'll be there, no matter what. Be his friend. His good, close friend." Ellie nudged her. "Be ready to take it slow and please don't get frustrated with him. That's all I ask. Remember, in many ways, he really is a 'stranger in a strange land'."

"I'll do everything I can, Ellie. I promise. He's worth it," Sarah said with conviction.

"He's absolutely worth it," Ellie agreed. "Especially when he's wearing his tiny and tight swimsuit." She cackled when Sarah's face turned beet red.

Sarah could clearly see the slump in Chuck's shoulders when he and Morgan came out of the serving line in Lakeside dining hall later that evening. Was he having second thoughts about revealing his secrets to her? Had something happened at baseball practice? Was something wrong with one of his seminars? One of his tests? She had no idea. Her first impulse was to run over to him to find out what was wrong, but she steeled herself to wait for him to arrive. From the look on his face, and Morgan's, she figured that it wouldn't take very long before he was explaining what had him so upset. By the time the duo arrived at the Songbirds' normal tables, most of the girls had picked up on the uneasy vibe they were giving off.

"Hi y'all. How's everybody doing tonight?" Chuck greeted the tables wistfully. Morgan took his seat next to Alex. She gave him a look, but he just shook his head. Meanwhile, Chuck moved around the table to take his accustomed seat next to Sarah.

"Chuck, what's wrong? You're not sorry you talked to us, earlier are you?" Sarah asked with a bit of trepidation.

Chuck was lost in thought, so it took him a moment to respond. "What? No, I'm not sorry for telling you my stuff," he shook his head and sighed. "No, the coach told us that we're starting full on-field team practices tomorrow afternoon."

"What does that mean?" Sarah wondered.

"It means that instead of three practices, like we've been doing, we'll only have two. Weightlifting in the morning before class time and regular baseball practice from 1 pm until 5 pm each day, seven days a week. We'll play our inter-squad games on a couple of those days in that time window," he looked sadly around the table. "That means no more hanging out with y'all at your practice for this year, from now until school is over after spring quarter. No more football games unless they're going to be played on Saturday evening after we're done with our practice. The good news is I'll get a much better idea of what winter and spring quarters are going to be like for me, juggling practices and games alongside my academic workload. It'll allow me to make any adjustments to my daily schedule, if I have to, before I'm up to my neck in the middle of it."

"Will you still be able to eat with us or are you starting that training table … thing … you were telling us about?" Amy piped up.

"No, the training table won't start until we get back after the new year. But that will be over at Branner dining hall, unless something changes between now and then," Chuck said.

"That's not a problem, Chuck. We might come over to Branner and join you for dinner. Who knows?" Sarah smiled.

"Training table is all three meals, though, isn't it, Curls?" Zondra asked.

"Yeah, it is," Chuck confirmed. "So, Morgs and I will be making the trek over to Branner every day. Not as convenient as Lakeside, but we don't have any choice. And the dining hall will still be open for non-athletes to eat there, so you could come over there and eat with us, if you wanted to. They'll be giving us a training table orientation right when we get back on campus after the holidays. A nutritionist will be on staff in the dining hall to direct and monitor our eating during the run up to the season and throughout the season."

"That's all a good thing, right?" Sarah asked.

"Yeah, it's all good," Chuck nodded. "I'm just going to miss hanging out with y'all at practice is all," he shrugged.

"And we'll miss having you there, too, Chuckles. Doesn't seem right for our mascot to not be there to watch us practice while he pretends to be studying," Carina winked at him to let him know she was only teasing. Chuck gave her a crooked grin. By now, he knew it was pointless to try and set the record straight. He really did spend his time with them studying, but Carina had to get her teasing in. Chuck had learned to let her have a few of them, from time to time.

Sarah pointed at his food. "You better start eating before your food gets cold. If you're going to be having baseball practice every day, you'll need your strength." Chuck smiled softly at her and turned his attention to his food, so he missed the bemused expressions some of the girls around him wore.

Alex took the opportunity to lean over and whisper in Morgan's ear, "Did Chuck tell you that he told us a bunch of stuff about himself earlier this afternoon?"

Morgan nodded, "Yeah, he told me the whole story on our way back here from practice. You guys put him in a tough spot, but I'm glad he's finally told you all his story. Keeping it a secret has been tough. Especially from you."

Alex squeezed his bicep and kissed him on the cheek. "I'm so proud of you for being such a good friend and keeping his secrets for him. That's a lot to hold in. I know it was hard for you."

"Not too hard, though," Morgan joked. "He's my best friend, but I really, really don't like making him mad. Keeping his secrets is easier than dealing with him when he gets mad."

"Well, nevertheless, I plan on rewarding you for your loyalty later, after dinner," she grinned saucily.

"Oh boy!" Morgan swallowed.

Morgan and Alex had made their excuses and rushed off at the end of dinner. The remaining Songbirds had cleared their trash and had gone their separate ways to their evening activities. Chuck was walking back to the dorm with the CATS. They were talking quietly, but Chuck could feel their curious glances aimed his way from time to time. Finally, he sighed and stopped walking.

"Please don't do that," he pleaded.

"Don't do what, Chuck?" Sarah asked.

"Please don't look at me like I'm some sort of … I don't know what," he shrugged.

"Chuck -," Sarah began, but Amy jumped in.

"You're a freaking genius who can do all sorts of amazing things! It's hard to ignore," Amy exclaimed, forgetting her earlier comments about treating him like a regular person.

Chuck shook his head. "Don't look at me like that. Please, don't think about me that way." He held his hands out while he pleaded with them. "That stuff isn't who I am. It's only what I can do. When I'm not doing that stuff, I'm just a guy. A nineteen-year-old guy attending Stanford. I'm the same guy I was before I told you about my secrets."

"I don't understand, Chuck. What do you mean? How are you separate from what you can do? You're the one doing those things. Not somebody else." Zondra asked. Sarah stayed silent and watched.

Chuck thought for a second. "OK, what about this?" He looked from girl to girl. "Y'all are beautiful. All of the Songbirds are. Different, but each of you is beautiful. And you sing like angels. But is that how you see yourselves? Is that how you approach the world? Are you strutting around campus being like 'Hey, I'm beautiful and sing like an angel, what's everyone having for lunch today?'" The CATS were giggling.

"Well, that is the way Carina acts all the time, but not the rest of us, no," Zondra snarked.

"Bite me, Z," Carina said, trying to sound upset, but her smirk won out.

"No, Chuck, you're right. You're right," Sarah admitted. "We're not being fair to you. We'll try and do better. Focus on you, our friend, and not the stuff you can do in the classroom or laboratory or on the baseball field."

"Thank you. That's all I ask," Chuck nodded. "It's that old line about putting my trousers on one leg at a time, like everyone else."

"We've got your back, Chuck. No worries," Carina assured him. Chuck was surprised to hear Carina telling him that.

As the group neared the dorm, Chuck slowed down, again. "Sarah, do you have a minute? I'd like to ask you something," he said hesitantly. The elder CATS shared a look.

"Sure, Chuck," she walked over to where he was standing. "What's up?"

"Uh … A lot happened today …," he began.

"Yeeaah, it did," she agreed.

"Well … um … I was thinking about taking a walk to kind of clear my head …" Chuck was shuffling his feet and looking down at the ground.

"OK?" Sarah was confused, but she thought that she had an idea of what was coming. Her stomach did a little flip.

"And I was wondering … ah … I was wondering if you … if you would … um … what I mean is …" He stopped talking, but kept his eyes on the ground.

"You were wondering … what?" Sarah asked gently as she fought to keep the silly grin, she was feeling, from showing on her face. She focused on willing him to have the courage to say what he was trying to say.

Chuck took a deep breath and blew it out. His head came up and he looked into her eyes. Her heart skipped a beat at the intensity she saw there. "I was going to take a walk and I was wondering if you would like to walk with me," he rushed out. She began to smile at him. "And, maybe, if you have more questions, you can ask them. And I will answer them. Would that be OK?" He bit his lips nervously.

"I'd like that, Chuck. Very much," Sarah smiled, her chest filled with warmth. This was a first step. Both small and huge at the same time. Her smile grew. She was proud of his courage. Chuck rewarded her with his full eye crinkling, nose wrinkling, Bartowski smile as he gestured for her to start walking.

"After you, Sarah," he said softly.

Sarah looked over at her grinning friends. "We'll be back after a while. See you later." She wiggled her fingers at them. As the pair walked off into the distance, the remaining CATS shared wide-eyed looks.

"This had been a momentous day," Carina shook her head in wonder. Amy and Zondra voiced their agreement. "And it's not over yet," the redhead observed.

A/N2: Chapter title comes from the song by Imogen Heap. We all know this song from the TV show. Not using it as a sad song here, but for the uncertainty of where everyone stands relative to Chuck and how does everyone deal with his revelations. Particularly, the lines 'Where do we go from here? How do we carry on?'

A/N3: I don't usually give hints in my A/Ns, but chapter 17 didn't reveal everything. Of course not. What do you take me for? An amateur? Well, yeah, you're right. I actually am an amateur, but nevertheless, there are more reveals coming at some point. One hint: do the math, there's something missing.

A/N4: Full disclosure. I made a mistake or an oversight in the story. I had the baseball team begin their fall inter-squad games before I had them begin full on-field practices. In reality, the events in this chapter dealing with the change in practices would have happened back in October (in the story) and not in November. I did it the way I did so I could engineer the two birthday celebrations. And the big reveals, of course. Please don't revoke my artistic license.

A/N5: Many thanks to WillieGarvin for sticking with me while I tried to deal with my latest round of writer's block. He's always offering advice and encouragement to help me come up with more story for you nice readers out there. It helps me to connect the dots, so to speak. Thanks, WG.

A/N6: Thank you for reading. Please drop me a PM or leave a review. Let me know what you think. For those of you who have left reviews or PMs previously, thank you. I appreciate each and every one of them.

A/N7: If you enjoy Chuck fan fiction here on the fanfic site, go over to Facebook and join the Chuck Fanfiction group that's there. You'll find nice folks who share your interest in our favorite spy couple. You are not alone.