A/N: This is it! The conclusion of this sweet story! I hope you've enjoyed reading it as much as I've enjoyed writing it! Leave a review, please! I love hearing from my readers!
The next morning, I woke very suddenly, jerking out of my dreams and breathing deeply to steady myself. When a pair of arms tightened around me, I couldn't control the surprised yelp that surfaced from my throat, and I fought away from the person in my bed. Their hold was broken willingly, and I backed myself against the headboard, clutching my shirt over my heart as I tried to figure out what on earth was going on. My heart only insisted its unrelenting racing when I found the man lying on the other side of the bed.
"Krad! So, it wasn't…" I trailed off when my voice cracked. I pressed the heel of my hand into my eye and shook my head. "It wasn't a dream," I muttered the rest of my sentence as I continued to rub the sleep from my eyes.
"That was amusing, to say the least," Krad teased, stretching his arms up toward the ceiling and then folding them behind his head. To say he was more relaxed than usual was an understatement. Sometime in the night, he must have gotten uncomfortable, because he had changed clothes, into…
"Wait, are those my clothes?" I demanded. He donned a loose maroon t-shirt and sweatpants that didn't quite fit correctly.
"They are. Though, I must say if I'm going to be living here permanently, I'm going to have to get my own. Our statures aren't identical," he observed. It was such a mundane topic of conversation coming from someone that I didn't even know was capable of pleasant interaction that my brain actually stuttered for a moment before I could reply.
"Yes, those pants are about two inches too short on you," I agreed. I had to stop and admire him, though. His attire was always one of the questionable things about him. I had never really agreed with his fashion choices, though the fact that he regularly found new ways to torture me was more heavily the issue. In more casual garb, he was only proving the change he claimed. He had completely destroyed every animosity he had ever held toward me. "So, I'm still fighting with the fact that you're here. In my bed. Wearing my clothes. And smiling at me like that. How could all of this happen in less than twenty years? How did you spend three hundred years with no conscience and then so easily let go of all of the hostility?" I asked him, averting my eyes from the tame expression he was giving me. Krad chuckled.
"It wasn't easy. When I came back to you, part of me did want to kill you. But I realized quickly that I couldn't. My strength was as drained as yours was. When I felt that, it all hit me so hard I could barely think. So many things came to my mind at once. You were so weak, not to mention the fact that you were alone. And then I started actually observing you. You had a job, even if it was a dull one. You were functioning fairly well. And you were thirty-six years old. The rest of your ancestors died by the time they were thirty. That was when I realized how strong you really are. The fear you had as a child was gone. Even when you realized my presence, it was more an annoyance than a horror. Still, I wanted to hold onto my pride. I wanted to continue on as though I hadn't started to admire you. But I couldn't. The first time the transformation began to trigger and you fell to your knees, I buried my presence as quickly as I could. I wanted to hold you and tell you I was sorry. You didn't deserve anything I ever did to you. You deserved to live, and I'm glad you did," he spilled his heart to me, and I listened, staring at the wall across the room and trying to fathom these emotions coming from Krad. I laughed a bit at his assessment of me, though.
"Thank you, but I believe you're speaking much too highly of me," I told him. Without warning, he sat up and wrapped his arms around me, pulling me to him and burying his face in my neck from behind. "Could you warn me before you do things like that?" I demanded. The jolt in my heart from such actions still wasn't exactly pleasant. He chuckled into my skin and shifted to look at my face.
"Why? You don't have to worry about transforming. I think you can handle some romantic spontaneity now," he reminded me. I smiled, knowing he was right.
"Still, that feeling doesn't exactly bring back good memories," I pointed out. Suddenly, he took my chin in his hand and wrenched my eyes to his, taking my lips in a suffocating kiss that almost knocked the air from my lungs. He pressed against me until I gave in, letting him push me down onto my back on the mattress. I was considering pushing him away just as he released me, hovering over me with the ends of the shorter segments of his hair tickling my face.
"I want it to start creating good memories. Don't ever hold back loving me because you don't want to feel it," he whispered, his golden eyes piercing my indifferent façade.
"I never said I love you," I shot back with a haughty smirk.
"I think we both know better than that," he replied, returning my expression. He bent to kiss my cheek before sitting up, leaving me lying back on the bed. I sighed, staring up at the ceiling for what felt like several minutes before I caught Krad looking over his shoulder at me.
"What?" I asked, sitting up to level our gazes.
"I was convinced that you were never going to accept me. I had done too much to you for you to ever think I was worth your affection. I figured you would rather die alone than let me in. I'm so glad I was wrong," he replied. I had to admit I was still a bit cautious to truly open up to him. The man already knew everything about me, but that was the least of my worries. I didn't want to show weakness to him any more than I already had, and initiating romance was very much my definition of vulnerability.
"You look ridiculous wearing those clothes. Put yours back on and we'll go shopping," I suggested. He began to immediately pull my shirt over his head, and I jumped up from the bed, hurriedly going to the door. "At least let me leave the room first," I insisted, looking to the doorknob as I turned it.
"Oh, Satoshi, don't be that shy. We're both adults. And you do know I've seen you naked before, right? We did share a body for a few years, not to mention those few weeks recently," he pointed out. I felt the heat rising to my face, and I swore I was probably twelve shades of crimson. His laugh as I retreated from the room proved me correct, but I didn't even hesitate. Krad certainly hadn't lost his straightforwardness, even if it wasn't in the context of a superiority complex. I sat on the couch and took several deep breaths to calm my embarrassment, but before I had cleared my mind, he was exiting the bedroom, only dressed in part of his usual ensemble. Thankfully, he had skipped the outrageous overcoat and cuffed gloves, opting for just his white pants, apparently deciding after he had already taken it off that my shirt fit him well enough to be decent in public.
"If I am to blend in, this will suffice, I'm sure," he commented, shoving his hands in his pockets and standing before me for approval.
"Yes, it's fine," I replied, really just to appease him. He chuckled and bent to my eye level, giving me a smile that admittedly melted my heart. But I was far from telling him that.
"Teasing you is as easy as ever," he jeered, leaning forward to kiss my forehead before straightening his posture again. I was absolutely baffled by how affectionate he was. Perhaps he thought he needed to make up for lost time, and still maybe he was copying what he had seen of human interactions. Whatever the case was, I wasn't going to tell him to stop. Suddenly, a knock on my door arrested my attention. My eyes darted to the clock. It was nearly noon, and Daisuke had left me in a questionable state two evenings ago.
"Daisuke," I muttered, looking up to Krad while I tried to consider what to do. Hide him? Pretend I was still miserable? I shook my head against both of those possibilities and rose to answer the second round of knocking. Perhaps after hearing what had happened, he would actually be happy for me. I was about to find out.
"Hey, Satoshi," Daisuke greeted me with his usual bright smile, walking past me when I gestured that he come inside. However, just as I expected, he stopped in his tracks when he saw Krad standing in the middle of my living room. He whipped back around to me, and I sighed. I took the food from his hands, fearing that he would drop it, and led him to the couch as Krad backed away to lean on my desk. "Is that… that's Krad," Daisuke stuttered as he fell onto a seat of the couch. Krad's expression was neutral, and I was glad when he didn't speak.
"Yeah," I replied, letting Daisuke take it in slowly.
"But how? I thought he was sealed with Dark," he muttered, still staring at the man across the room.
"May I explain?" Krad requested. I nodded, more than willing to give him this one. "Satoshi gave me life through his painting," he began, gesturing to the canvas that still sat on the desk. "I was half of The Black Wings until he created a piece of art that didn't contain Dark at all. It gave me the opportunity I needed to escape the bondage of The Black Wings, and I was able to find my way here through his artwork," he completed his thought, much more eloquently than I would have managed given the circumstances.
"That's great!" Daisuke exclaimed, but his grin fell when he looked to me. I was still somberly contemplative. "Right? That's a good thing," he asked.
"It is. Just, can you keep this a secret, too? I mean, eventually Kioko may find out, but I'd rather her not know just yet. She and Krad don't exactly have the greatest history," I requested.
"Of course. Yeah, I get it. So, you're alright now?" he inquired. I looked to him and smiled, and just that small thing made him relax.
"I am. And if I'm ever not, I'm not alone anymore," I told him, turning to Krad, whose indifferent mask broke into a grin just from my eye contact with him. Daisuke nodded and stood.
"Alright, well, I'm glad you're happy again. Really, I am," he said gleefully, practically skipping back to the door. "Bye, Satoshi," he threw over his shoulder as he left. I shook my head, a wistful smile still on my lips.
"You know, I don't know that I would have been able to stand having a tamer like that," Krad admitted. I laughed outright at the comment and stood from the couch, going to him and taking his hand.
"Let's go. You're not wearing my clothes forever," I reminded him. He chuckled and went to the door with me, only stopping me for a moment to press his lips to mine before we went out onto the streets. The day was so casual I began to doubt that I wasn't just dreaming again. It was too much to think that I was clothes shopping with Krad. I stayed out of his way, though. I certainly wasn't going to dote over his every selection like a hormonal teenager pining for his attention. Though, that was exactly how the shop employees reacted. I rolled my eyes every time one of them would give him special attention, their eyes floating with juvenile infatuation just from looking at him. He paid them no mind, though. I knew Dark would have. That peacock would have strutted through the stores relishing having every woman wrapped around his finger. But not Krad. He spoke to them politely, but past that he completely ignored them. After making several purchases, he changed out of the improvised outfit he had put together at my apartment and donned a pair of form-fitting dark-wash jeans and a light blue t-shirt with a white denim jacket to complete the ensemble. He was incredibly handsome, but I kept my comments to myself.
"I feel a bit guilty spending your money," Krad commented as we walked between shops. I laughed and shook my head. Yet another sentiment that I wasn't sure had actually come from the demon that used to live within me.
"I had enough money to retire when I was twenty-five. Everything I've made since then has just been extra," I assured him. He nodded, but still seemed thoughtful.
"Speaking of which, what about your job? Isn't it Tuesday?" he realized. My heart leaped into my throat at the subject change.
"I… I quit a couple of weeks ago," I muttered. Krad cast concerned eyes down to me, but I avoided his gaze. I could practically feel the 'why?' that was coming. "When you and Dark were sealed, I couldn't think straight. I kept missing work just because I had no idea what day it was. And when I was there, I couldn't function. Even the students were looking at me like I was crazy. They offered to give me temporary leave, but I decided to resign. I didn't need the money anyway. I was just doing it to keep myself busy," I explained before he could even ask. Thankfully, we entered the next store, and I took up a position against a wall, scanning the sales floor with very little interest. But when I saw Krad approaching a rack that was also being browsed by a much-too-familiar woman, I held back a gasp. She wasn't supposed to find out. There had to be something- No, he was already brushing past her, and she had already looked up. I rushed over to prevent the impending explosion, reaching Kioko just in time to slap my hand over her mouth before she screamed. "Kioko, calm down. Don't you dare scream in this store. No one is going to hurt you," I growled into her ear. I felt her breath slowing against my hand, and she finally pulled my hand from her face, still staring up to Krad.
"What is going on?" she demanded, turning to face me, evidently convinced that the tall blonde behind her wasn't going to harm her.
"That's… a long story. Really, really long," I warned her. She glanced at her watch, her eyes showing no mercy. She was going to make me explain.
"I'll text Daisuke and tell him to go get Kimiko from school today. I have a feeling he knows something about this, because he was acting very strange when he got home from checking on you today. You're telling me everything," she commanded. I nodded, waiting the few seconds it took her to send a message to her husband. "We're going down to the coffee shop. Don't even think of bailing on me. It wouldn't be hard to track down a man with blue hair and another one with a blonde ponytail down to his ankles," she threatened. I had never seen her like this, though we were only close for a few months, and most of that time was spent with her pitying me and fearing Krad. So, I figured I had likely missed out on much of her personality.
"She has changed from her youth. Perhaps I was a bit hasty in driving her away from you," Krad muttered into my ear as we followed her out. I jabbed my elbow into his side and shot him a glare that only made him chuckle. When we arrived, I was glad that the place was empty other than the employees. We settled at a table in the corner of the shop and ordered drinks simply to be polite. I certainly wasn't actually interested in having anything. The anxiety of spilling the contents of the past weeks to Kioko was eating at me.
"Well? Who's going first? Start talking," she demanded as soon as our server had retreated from the table. I glanced to Krad, who took up the mantle willingly.
"I suppose it started when I reappeared after my eighteen-year absence," he began. He told her every detail that he had shared with me, and her wide-eyed disbelief never waned when he reached the part of the story containing his feelings for me. I avoided her eyes entirely, intent on staring at the small chip on the ceramic saucer under my coffee cup. He concluded with the events immediately preceding his sealing in The Black Wings, and I finally looked up. Kioko's hand was held over her mouth, completely floored by everything Krad had said. That was when I picked up where he left off. I was well aware that I was about to tell both of them this for the first time. I hadn't fully disclosed how I felt when I came back home after Krad had confessed to me.
"After that, I couldn't think straight for weeks. As you know, I quit my job. I don't know how much Daisuke told you, but I wasn't eating. I wasn't sleeping. More often than not, I was crying when no one else was around. I hated myself. To think I was weak enough to just fall apart like that because of one stupid, well-spoken confession. But it was real. I knew it was. And that just made it worse. Knowing there was someone out there that loved me, and I couldn't have them back. I guess I have Daisuke to thank. He told me that studies showed that expressing emotion through art could help you cope. I didn't want to do it. Nothing good has ever come from Hikari art. But it was the only way I was ever going to have closure, because my memories just weren't enough. So, I painted Krad. Just him, standing in front of The Black Wings, giving me one last smile before he disappeared. Apparently, giving him his own work of art made him able to separate from The Black Wings and use that medium to travel back here," I explained. Kioko dropped her hand to her lap, but still she seemed unwilling to accept what was happening.
"So… the two of you are…" she lifted her hands from her lap and brought her index fingers together as if to imply a relationship between us.
"No," I replied just as quickly as Krad said "yes." I scowled at him, and he only tossed me a smile. "Not… officially," I revised.
"I slept in your bed last night. I figured that made it pretty official," Krad muttered, grinning mischievously when Kioko's mouth fell open.
"Nothing happened," I swore. She giggled at my insistence and shook her head.
"It's okay. I'm just glad you're happy. It's been a long time since I saw you relax," she admitted. Before I could reply, though, Krad was putting his hand on top of mine on the table, drawing my eyes up to him. He wasn't looking at me, though.
"Well, Kioko, are you satisfied?" he asked the woman across the table. She glanced at our hands before looking up to him.
"Not yet. If you ever hurt him again, I will find a way to destroy you. Slowly and painfully, just like you did to him when he was a kid. You better be glad he's giving you a chance, because you certainly don't deserve it," she told him, her eyes stone cold as she spoke. Krad only gave her a gentle smile and nodded.
"I am, and I already swore to him that I would never do anything to harm him again. I intend to keep that promise," he replied. Kioko still seemed like she was having a hard time with the sensitive things he was saying, but she gave him a swift nod. "Also, I'd like to apologize to you, Kioko," he added. He seemed a bit hesitant to admit it, but he kept eye contact with her.
"For what?" she asked. I knew she hadn't forgotten. She just didn't want to bring it to mind again. It was rather traumatic.
"For using you to get to Dark. I didn't mean any of it. It was just an opportunity to hurt someone I knew he loved. I'm sorry," Krad admitted. Tears filled Kioko's eyes, but she wiped them away before they could fall.
"Thank you. I… I forgive you," she replied. Not long after that, she rose from her seat, and Krad and I followed her lead. Once outside, I saw Kioko take a deep breath before turning to us. "Take care of Satoshi," she told Krad, who smiled to her and nodded. I wanted to retaliate, firmly against the idea that I needed to be taken care of, but I quickly remembered that I hadn't shown much mental or emotional fortitude lately. Perhaps I needed someone more than I admitted.
When we arrived back at home, Krad stashed his purchases in the bedroom and then hurriedly caught my waist before I could sit down. He held me against him with one arm, bringing the other hand to my chin to keep my eyes on him.
"You know, this isn't going to work if you keep pretending not to like me," he teased. I scoffed and tried to fight out of his grip. "Satoshi, please," he whispered, the begging in his voice stopping me in an instant. I turned my gaze to him again, and seeing the concern creasing his brow broke me down. It was like my brain was still somehow interpreting this as a dream. Something that was going to disappear again, just like he did the first time. Like if I showed any emotion, it would shatter this image my mind had created. But he was real, and he wasn't leaving.
"I'm sorry," I said quietly. I relaxed in his arms and brought my fingertips to his forehead, pushing the hair back and tucking it behind his ear. My hand rested on the back of his neck, the other sneaking under his jacket to feel the soft fabric of his shirt. I looked over his face for a moment, taking in the calm in his eyes before pulling him down to meet his lips with mine. Fire ran in my veins, and I wasn't afraid of it this time. I only pressed in harder, drinking in the admiration of Krad's wandering hands. His touch was slow, trailing from my shoulder, down my side to my waist. He continued only a bit further, hooking his thumb on my pocket and spreading his fingers around my hip. I broke our kiss, my hand going to his as a caution. I couldn't deny the desire that coursed through me, but I didn't know if I was quite ready to give myself to him.
"I won't go further. I'll wait for you," he assured me, pressing his forehead to mine. He tilted his head to endow one more kiss to my lips before backing away. "Satoshi," he said, taking my waist and lightly holding me against him.
"Yes?" I prompted when he didn't continue.
"Will you be my boyfriend?" he asked. I couldn't help but laugh at the juvenile question. "Well, apparently you need this to be official, so I'm officially asking. A formal proposal," he responded to my laughter. When I calmed my mirth, I looked up to him.
"Yes, I will. But nothing changes, understand? This doesn't mean I'm ready to go any further physically," I warned him. He smiled and brought his hand up to smooth the hair away from my forehead.
"Of course. Whatever you want," he promised. After dinner, which was the first meal I had prepared for myself in going on three weeks, Krad and I settled on the couch, his arm holding me to his side as though he never wanted to let go. His incessant touch wasn't at all unwelcome, but it was confusing.
"Why are you so affectionate toward me? I feel like it would have taken some practice for you to really be good at expressing attraction for someone," I observed. Krad shook his head and chuckled lightly.
"I've been alive for over three hundred years. I've seen people kissing and hugging and the like. And you must remember I had a connection to Dark. He has actually engaged in these actions before. Surely there was some transfer in experiences," he pointed out. That observation made me stiffen under his hand. "Don't worry. That doesn't mean he ever felt this way for you, or that I ever had any attraction for anyone he did. It's just a matter of muscle memory, I suppose," he assured me. I nodded, but didn't relax.
"But you've never actually felt this way before, have you?" I inquired.
"No, but that doesn't mean I don't know what I'm feeling," he replied.
"I know, because I've never felt this way, either, but love is hard to mistake," I muttered. His hand twitched on my shoulder, and I only realized what I said after it had already left my mouth. Less than two days and I was already letting my mouth run far too much. I sighed and looked to him, pressing a gentle kiss to his cheek. "Yes, Krad. I love you," I whispered. He smiled and roughly kissed my mouth for only a moment.
"I know. I was just waiting to hear you say it," he teased. I shook my head and settled back into my seat. This man, a man I had once considered a demon and a curse, had somehow brought happiness into a life that had been rife with chaos and pain. Pain he once inflicted. He had reversed my entire perception of him in no time at all, and all it had taken was a reality check for both of us. If we had lowered the walls between us eighteen years ago, who knew what would have happened? When I began to doze off on the couch, I felt Krad lift me into his arms and carry me to the bedroom, but I didn't have the consciousness to protest. He lowered me gently to the soft mattress and lay down next to me. He kissed my forehead so tenderly I hardly felt the contact. "Good night, Master Satoshi. My everything," he whispered. I rolled onto my side to face him, though I was still much too asleep to open my eyes, and he took my hand in his. I had spent most of my life dreading the moment when he returned, but when he did, I found myself unable to live without him. Finally, there was peace, and I never wanted to let it go.